This chapter's for Hurricane Horse, because Garcia annoys me too.
Dave rolled out of bed, being careful not to wake the woman beside him. The pillow wall was on the floor and Erin's arm was thrown around his waist, which is what he expected when he built the pillow wall in the middle of the bed. He picked up his watch from the nightstand, 6:30 on a Saturday morning. Already, the early morning sunrise cast a light through the curtains, leaving streaks of warmth across the mattress, framing Erin's face in pretty glow. He leaned over, tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead.
Her eyes opened slowly, "What time is it?"
"Shh…" he pressed a finger to his lips. "It's still early. Go back to sleep."
"Carlo," her voice was thick and husky with sleep.
"I got it."
Carlo was still asleep in the bassinet beside the bed, Dave made a bottle of formula, then picked him up and fed him. "See?" He sat down on the edge of the bed. "All good, Babe. Go back to sleep."
"Thanks," she smiled a little and closed her eyes. When Carlo was finished, Dave helped him burp and laid him back in the bassinet. Then he slid his feet into his slippers, grabbed a baby monitor off the dresser and padded downstairs, for coffee and eggs.
Usually, he would use this time to let Mudgie out the back door and start breakfast, But Mudgie and Bridget were wreaking havoc on Derek Morgan and Penelope Garcia. As he stepped off the last stair, he heard the faint gurgling noise of the coffee maker and a soft voice.
"You're up early." Mrs. Rossi was seated at the counter with a steaming mug of black coffee in front of her. She shuffled a deck of cards and dealt out a game of solitaire. She was fully dressed, her naturally dark hair was lightly streaked with silver, pulled into a neat bun at the back of her head.
Dave went to the counter and got a mug down from the cupboard, pouring himself a cup. "I'm always up this early." He said, pulling up a chair beside her.
She patted his arm affectionately and raised her mug. Giving him an appraising look. "Are you doing okay?"
He glanced down at his mug but didn't get lost in thought. For some reason, it seemed like a loaded question.
"It's not a test." Mrs. Rossi squeezed his arm. "You've been through a lot. It's natural to feel a little…" She shrugged, "Well, you know." She clicked her tongue, shaking her head. "My son…the FBI Profiler."
"I'm fine, Mama." He got up and grabbed the carafe of coffee, topping off their cups. "Erin's on the edge though." He thought about how she wouldn't let Carlo out of her sight, she wouldn't sleep until they were in the same room.
"I don't think it would hurt either of you to talk to someone…" Mrs. Rossi said.
"Talking to each other would be a good start," Dave took a sip of his coffee, then got up. This wasn't a conversation he wanted to have with his mother. She didn't need anymore ammunition to use on Erin and it wasn't fair to talk about her when she wasn't in the room.
He went to the refrigerator and rummaged through what little was in there. Then went out to the garage, where they kept an extra freezer. Pre-cooked breakfast casserole would have to do, until he could go to the store.
"Are you going to do that, some time today?" His mother sat her cup on the counter and spread her hands wide. "Ya know…talk to her."
"If the opportunity presents itself," he said, preheating the oven. If he kept busy, she would stop interrogating him. "It's too early in the day for this kind of conversation." He said, topping off his cup. "Did you make this?" He took another sip, it was different than the usual grocery store faire. "It's delicious!"
Carmelina nodded and pointed to the canister on the counter. "I brought it for you, from Italy."
"Thank you, Ma." He smiled and kissed her withered cheek. "That was nice of you." It was a nice gesture, which he appreciated. "I'm surprised the TSA didn't hassle you over it."
She shrugged, "It fit in my carry-on."
When the oven beeped, Dave slid the casserole inside and set a timer. "Is your room okay?" He gestured down the hallway that led to the bedroom.
"Of course," She nodded and sat back down at the counter.
"Good," Dave picked up the baby monitor and watched it. Carlo and Erin were still sleeping and he almost wished they would get up and hang out with him. If he were lucky, the smells of fresh coffee, eggs, sausage, cheese, potatoes and gravy, would waft up the stairs and get Erin's attention. Unfortunately, that didn't happen.
Another 20 minutes passed quietly, Dave sipped coffee with his mother, but they didn't have too much to talk about. When the timer dinged, he donned a pair of oven mitts and pulled the casserole from the oven and laid it on a pot holder on the counter. Then took some plates down from the cabinet and checked the baby monitor.
"What do I do here?" He asked, digging into the casserole with a serving spoon.
Carmelina judged by the way he checked the baby monitor that he was trying to decide whether to wake Erin with breakfast or eat without her. "You let her sleep as long as she wants. As a matter of fact," her thick Italian accent slipped out, "go upstairs and get Carlo so he doesn't wake her."
Dave shook his head, "and scare the shit out of her? No thanks, Mama." Erin would probably take up Cocaine and he didn't like the idea of little white lines on his kitchen table. Not to mention the conflict of interest. He looked towards the stairs and picked up the baby monitor again. "We'll wait it out."
She stacked the cards and shuffled the deck. "A game?"
"Only if it's Poker."
"Do you have chips?"
He beamed, and brought the set down from the tall cabinet. "Boy, do I!"
An hour later, Dave tossed down his cards and added an I.O.U to the pile of coins on the table.
"Isn't there a rule against cleaning out your kid?" Dave shoved his pile towards Carmelina. They'd put the poker chips back in the cabinet and were now betting with quarters from the swear jar.
"Better throw some coin rollers in the pot," she scraped the pile off to the side of the table. "I'm gonna need them."
"We'll get them from the bank, Ma." He said, getting up. He brought her a zip top bag from a drawer in the kitchen. He'd get a few rolls of quarters too.
"What's this for?" She raised a dark eyebrow at him.
"To the victor, go the spoils." Dave answered, picking up the quarters.
"I'm not keeping them!" She said, aghast. "You just had a baby, I'm not taking your money."
"There's $50 here, Ma." Dave said.
"Which you took from the swear jar."
"We're potty-mouths," He shrugged, "and you won it, fair and square."
"We?" She raised an eyebrow.
"Mostly me. Sometimes Erin."
"Alright," she picked up the cards and started shuffling them. "New rules. Five rounds, winner takes all."
"Just take the money, Ma!"
"We're not playing with money," she went to the drawer and grabbed a notepad and pen.
"What are we doing?"
"We're playing with…" she laid the notebook in the middle of the table. "Feelings, in the only acceptable way."
"You want me to bet my emotions?"
She nodded. "Write it down, throw it in the pot. We'll get rid of it at the end of the game. But," she gave him a stern look. "You can't use an I.O.U."
He nodded, this wasn't his favorite way to play but he'd give it a shot. It might help. "Are we reading these?"
"Oh hell no," she tossed a handful of quarters back into the jar, with a jangle. Then handed him the deck. "You deal."
He shuffled the cards, easily tenting his hands like a professional. Then began to deal the cards. Mama Rossi shoved the notepad and pen in his direction.
He shook his head, "You first. No, I.O.U's."
She took the pen, tore off a slip of paper, wrote a few words then neatly folded the paper and laid it in the middle of the table. "Your turn." There was no getting out of this now. Short of getting up and walking away, but he couldn't do that to his mother. He thought for a minute, then wrote something down, folded it tightly, and added it to the pot.
They had played several hands, there was a mountain of paper notes on the table. They'd eaten and their plates and forks sat on a far corner of the table. On habit, Dave checked the baby monitor, he got a good view of Carlo, sleeping peacefully in his bassinet. He glanced at the clock on the oven, they'd been playing for nearly four hours. Dave's knees were starting to ache and his ass was tingling. "Alright, Ma, last round." He decided, dealing out the cards. "I need to stand up and…" he checked the monitor, Carlo was starting to stir. "I'm going to get the kid."
"What happened to not wanting to scare Erin?" Mama Rossi asked, as she added another piece of paper to the pot.
Dave held up the pad, "I'll leave a note on her pillow."
"That's fair," She laid down her cards in a Royal Flush.
"Damn," Dave whistled lowly and laid down his hand. "Four of a kind. I'm almost glad we didn't play for money this time."
Carmelina grinned indulgently, "I'm sure you are." She said as he got up, stretching his legs as he bagged the notes in an old grocery bag.
"I'm going to get Carlo." Dave said, scrawling a note on a piece of paper.
Carmelina beamed, rubbing her hands together, "wonderful!"
On habit, he grabbed the grocery bag and headed upstairs. When he got to his bedroom, he could hear the shower running. He knocked twice on the doorframe, even though the bathroom door was wide open.
Sweetly scented steam wafted into the room, telling him that this was one of Erin's long, languid showers, where she did mysterious things with many fragrant and good-smelling products.
"Good morning!" He called out, as Erin shut off the water. "Breakfast is ready downstairs, I'm grabbing Carlo."
"I'll be there in a minute!" Erin called out and Dave caught a glance of her shadow in the walk-in shower as she balanced one foot on the built-in shower bench, shaving. He smiled, "Take your time."
Just then, as if listening in on the conversation, Carlo made himself known from the bassinet beside the bed.
On habit, Dave tossed the bag of notes into the wastebasket on his side of the bed, then scooped Carlo into his arms and nuzzled his neck. He smelled sweet, like milk and baby lotion. "Good morning, my boy." Dave said, Carlo blinked at him and grinned sleepily. "Want to see your house?" Dave whispered, changing the baby. "We gotta clean up first." He said, pulling baby wipes from the container and removing the dirty diaper. Carlo whimpered when the cold wipe touched him.
"Yeah, I know." Dave mumbled, "it's cold."
Once Carlo was clean and dressed, Dave strapped him to his chest and took off downstairs, Erin was still in the bathroom.
Stepping off the last stair, he handed the baby over to Mrs. Rossi, who had washed her hands and already had a bottle waiting for him.
10 minutes later, Erin came down. She was dressed in yoga pants and a t-shirt. Her hair was still wrapped in a towel, but she had finished her makeup.
"Want some breakfast?" Dave dished out some of the casserole into a bowl, he'd left it warming in the oven.
She glanced around the room, the chest carrier was tossed over the top of a chair at the countertop. Her stomach clenched as she shot a look around the kitchen and into the living room, finding Carlo with her eyes and her chest loosened a little. Carmelina had him, they were on the sofa. Everything was fine. "Thanks," she took the bowl and sat down at the countertop. "Is there coffee?"
Dave nodded, topping off a cup, and slid it towards her. "Are the kids coming home?"
Erin dug in to her food. "Later. Maybe tomorrow. Peter's taking them to a water park."
"Fun!" Dave said brightly, "they'll like that." He thought back to Allison, who kept hassling them for a swimming pool. "Allison will have a blast."
"I'm not a fan." The idea of her kids getting lost in the crowds made her nervous. "Pete's not the most observant." She said, moving her casserole around with her fork. "I told him I didn't like the idea, but he didn't listen." She took a sip of her coffee. "I can't say I'm surprised."
"They'll be fine," Dave squeezed her hand across the marble counter. "And they'll be home before we know it."
"When are the dogs coming home?" Erin asked, changing the subject. The house suddenly felt empty without the persistent noise of her children and Mudgie.
"I don't know," He plucked his phone off the counter and checked his messages. "I guess I should let Derek know that we're home and ready for them." Dave wasn't keen on the idea of bringing home a basket of puppies, but Erin wanted to keep Bridget and Dave wanted to keep Erin. He would learn to live with the puppies.
"Thank you…" she took another sip of the coffee, "for taking Carlo this morning."
Dave nodded, "I think he likes it here,"
"Who wouldn't?" Erin finished her food, picked up the bowl and almost put it on the floor, then remembered that Mudgie wasn't home. She took the bowl to the sink, rinsed it and stuck it in the dishwasher. Then made a beeline for the living room.
"You know," Carmelina raised an eyebrow as Erin sat down in a plush, oversized chair across from Carmelina and Carlo, "my grandson is perfectly content right where he is."
"I know," Erin offered her mother-in-law a small smile, still uncomfortable being without her baby, even though he was just across the room.
"How did you survive the hospital?" Carmelina asked, shifting Carlo so he laid against her chest.
Erin crossed her legs at being put on the spot. "It wasn't easy, They only allowed one parent in at a time, Dave kept me updated with pictures and videos." She glanced across to the kitchen, where Dave was busy cleaning up the mess from breakfast. "He gets it."
Carmelina nodded, "That's because he feels it too." They all did. The unmistakable fear of another loss.
The baseball game played in the background, the Saint Louis Cardinals were up against the Toronto Blue Jays. With the Jays in the lead, but nobody was paying too much attention to the game. Carmelina was still cuddling with Carlo, but Erin wasn't too far away, on the loveseat across the room.
"Derek and Penelope are on their way with Mudgie and Bridget." Dave put his phone back in the pocket of his jeans and picked up his coffee mug. He had his arm around Erin, holding her in place on the living room sofa. If he let go of her, she would pounce on his mother and go hide upstairs with Carlo.
Erin glanced down at her hands, playing with her engagement ring. "I don't want to sound like a bitch." She said, tucking a stray curl behind her ear. She had changed into a short-sleeved cotton turquoise shift dress that fell to her knees and her hair was curled, twisted into a claw clip.
Dave raised an eyebrow, he wasn't sure where this was going. "Then… don't. Just say what you mean, Erin."
"Well.." Erin spread her hands wide, "could you ask Penelope to please tone it down a little with the glitter and perfume?"
Dave stared at her, "I didn't know we had a dress code to come visit." He said, without heat.
"She'll want to hold the baby and I don't want to hurt her feelings. I just thought…" she couldn't shake the idea of Carlo's tiny lungs taking in a giant whiff of cloying perfume or specks of glitter landing his eyes or mouth. "She'd never hurt him on purpose but the glitter…"
"I'm not telling Garcia how to dress," Dave said, squeezing her hand. "I promise, Carlo will be fine."
"I'll keep my eye on him," Carmelina said, patting Carlo's back. "No glitter is getting passed me and no one will deny the grandmother. I don't mind hurting someone's feelings if necessary." She gave Erin a wink, as if to let her know that she was on her side.
"It's not necessary," Dave said, standing up. "We can't treat Carlo like he's made of glass. He has people in his life who love him and I don't want to deny him that."
"We just made it out of the hospital," Erin got to her feet. "I don't want to cheat our kid out of his community, but waiting a day or two isn't going to hurt him."
"But it will hurt our friends-"
"Your friends." Erin pointed out, "I'm along for the ride."
"Well it's a good thing we're a package deal," he said, kissing her lightly on the lips.
"Get a room!" Carmelina groaned, she couldn't pass up a chance to heckle them. "I'll babysit."
They separated, Erin still held Dave's hand. "No thanks!" They said in unison.
"And I'll try not to take that personally," Carmelina complained and poked her tongue out.
"But you still don't agree with me," Erin said, turning her attention back on Dave.
"No," Dave shook his head, "Babe, I don't think visiting with our friends is going to hurt him…they know better than to kiss him and I'll make sure everyone washes their hands."
"And I'm allowed to hide upstairs."
Dave kissed her forehead. "You're allowed to do whatever you want. Go get a manicure and a three hour massage, if you want, but Carlo stays with me. You can give the team their gifts." He said, not that tickets to a concert or the reservations they'd made for a 'family dinner' would ever make up for the BAU finding Carlo, but it was the least they could do.
She nodded, "I'm not leaving the house and you'll come get me if he needs me."
Dave made a two finger salute. "Scout's honor."
"Don't let him fool you, Honey!" Carmelina interjected. "My son didn't last two weeks in the scouts."
"That was an accident!" Dave argued, shaking his head. "How many times do I have to say that?"
Erin's shoulders shook with laughter, she took his wrist, holding him in place. "What did you do?"
He smiled and threw her a wink, "That's a story for another time."
"Whatever," Erin brushed passed him and into the kitchen and started a fresh pot of coffee and added an array of snacks onto a tray. A small bowl of mixed nuts, apple slices and an unopened package of prosciutto. She laid the thin slices delicately on a plate.
"What are you doing?" Dave came up behind her and added cheese cubes to the tray.
"You're the host with the most," she sliced up an apple and added it, then arranged a sleeve of crackers artfully on a plate. "You know what they say… behind every great man…"
"Is a better woman," he finished the thought.
"Exactly," She smiled, "I'm just helping you look good." She handed him the tray. "Go set this out."
"Thanks," he pecked her cheek and took the tray. Just then, they heard gravel crunching up the driveway, Hotch's sensible SUV followed Derek's pickup truck with an extended cab. "just in time."
Erin relaxed a little, because Aaron would balance out the dynamics of the group.
Dave met everyone at the door with hand sanitizer and a lint roller, to catch any stray glitter or dog hair. Normally, he wouldn't care what was on their clothes, but Erin was right, even if he never said it. They had a new baby to look out for. Just as the thought crossed his mind, the doorbell rang. The clicking of Mudgie's paws on the porch caught Dave's attention as he opened the door.
"Mudgie!" Dave opened his arms for the 80-pound dog, who ran to him at full speed, nearly knocking him over. "Easy, Boy!" Dave scratched his black velvety ears and turned his attention to his friends. He offered Morgan a pump of the sanitizer and passed it around. "Come on in!" He said, taking Mudgie's leash in one hand and put Bridget's around his wrist, freeing his right hand.
"I for one," Penelope rubbed her hands together gleefully, "cannot wait to get my hands on the newest member of the BAU family."
"Just…" Dave pulled the door closed, "don't say that too loud." Thankfully, Garcia had kept the makeup to a minimum. She opted for brightly colored eyeshadow, fake lashes and artificial gemstones on the corners of her eyes. Erin would have a conniption.
"What's wrong?" Hotch balanced three large bags of groceries in one arm. Which Dave would pay him back for.
Morgan balanced a cardboard box in his hands. The puppies inside whimpered and cried. While Bridget stared eagerly at the box, pawing nervously at the ground.
Dave made an offhand gesture, the pushed the door open. "About the same thing happening with Bridget right now."
"I can hang onto the puppies and Bridget, until they're weaned." Derek offered.
"Are you sure?" Dave opened the door and held it open for the group.
"Sure," Derek sat the box down on the floor of the foyer and Bridget made a beeline for her puppies. She immediately inspected them, licked them and then crawled into the cardboard box. "I'll put it on your tab."
Dave clapped him on the shoulder, "thanks," he pulled a face. "I really wasn't looking forward to owning a zoo."
Derek grinned, "I know. You're gettin' too old for all this youth in one house."
Dave pulled back dramatically, "who are you calling old?"
"Watch it Morgan," Hotch repressed a smirk, sitting the grocery bags on the countertop. "Dave will put you on your ass and saddle you with that box of puppies."
"Boys," Penelope cut in, with her hands on her hips. "Who's going to show me that baby?"
"I will," Dave offered her a second pump of hand sanitizer. Then took her aside, feeling oddly protective. No one came before Erin, but he wasn't going to toss Garcia to the wolves either. "Erin's on the edge and she'll eventually relax, but I don't see the mama bear, calming down any time soon."
Penelope nodded, "of course, after what we've all been through…." she let the sentence hang.
"But Carlo is her baby." Dave hoped she got the point. "She'll let you hold him, but if he looks at her the wrong way, don't be upset when she swoops in and takes him upstairs."
"I got it," Penelope said. "Lead the way."
With that in mind, Dave led the group into the living room. Carmelina finished feeding Carlo then helped him burp before passing him to Dave.
"And you said Strauss was being overly protective," Derek teased, watching Dave inspect the baby. He pulled out his handkerchief and wiped Carlo's face with it.
"I'm not overprotective," Dave said, balancing Carlo against his shoulder.
"You're not any better than I am," Erin said, balancing a tray of coffee and various accouterments. Including, creamer and sugar, and a limited edition Starbucks tumbler filled with ice, for Garcia. The mugs rattled against the wooden tray as she sat it on the coffee table. She had thrown an apron over her dress, making her look like a housewife, circa 1950. Dave frowned at the idea. He didn't like that, not at all.
"Don't let Dave fool you," Erin teased. "He's a father-hen."
"I'm surprised he's not handing out face masks at the door," Hotch cracked a rare grin.
"Or medical gloves," Erin supplied, "Go ahead, Honey." She squeezed Dave's arm. "Hand him over….whenever you're ready."
Penelope wasn't paying attention to them, she was busy planning the perfect cup of coffee.
"What's this?" Penelope's face brightened as she noticed the cup that didn't match the black stoneware mugs on the tray. It was bright pink, with the phrase PG-13 bedazzled in various shades of purple. She peered inside the cup, seeing ice and the array of syrups for the coffee, on the tray. She beamed, "I feel so seen!"
Erin shrugged, opening her hands wide. "I didn't know how to thank you for your help… if you check your emails there should be floor seats to the first day of the NBA for each member of the team and their families."
"That's very generous," Hotch said. "Jack will be thrilled."
"That was the idea," Erin offered him a smile, "the BAU found my baby, basketball tickets were the least we could do. Dave bought them-"
"I wanted to take Paul," Dave supplied. "The girls too, if they wanted to go."
Erin shook her head, "I'll do something else with them that day."
"Dave… are you going to let someone else hold him or just stand there all day?" Carmelina asked, from an armchair beside the couch. Dave's eyes panned down to the floor, Penelope's four-inch heels made divots in the Italian rug but that could have been his imagination. Either way, he didn't have a 'no-shoes' rule and starting one now, would make his friends uncomfortable. "If you sit down, I'll hand him to you." He suddenly felt diplomatic, maybe Erin was onto something? Either way, it was too late now.
Penelope made herself comfortable on the sofa and Dave handed her the baby. Carlo didn't seem to notice.
"Hotch," Dave motioned towards the kitchen, "come on in here and I'll pay you for the groceries."
Penelope watched as the group filed into the kitchen, leaving her with the baby and Mrs. Rossi.
"He's a real sweetie," she gushed, adjusting Carlo so he laid on her chest.
"You're good with him," Carmelina said. She kept a sharp eye on her grandson. "If you get tired of him you can pass him over."
"Who could get tired of his sweet face?" Penelope resisted the temptation to squeeze his cheeks. He was warm and the soft weight of his body was oddly comforting. She could sit there all day. Just as the thought crossed her mind, Carlo squirmed on her chest. She patted his back, hoping he would fall back to sleep.
That didn't work, Penelope held Carlo so his head rested in the palm of her hand. His body lay down her arm and she could look at him. When the light shone just right, glinting on his cheek, just under his eye, was a bright pink plastic gemstone. "Mrs. Rossi." Penelope squeaked, "help."
Carmelina jumped into action by coming over to Penelope and assessing the situation. "It's really stuck, isn't it?" She clicked her tongue, running her index finger over the gem, trying to pry it loose.
"This is awful," Penelope said, biting her cheek.
"It's okay," Carmelina snagged a wipe from the diaper bag and sat down beside Penelope. "We'll get it off him and no one has to know."
Penelope bit the inside of her cheek, "Strauss is going to flip her lid. She'll probably never let me in the house again." Penelope said.
Carmelina smiled, "my daughter-in-law isn't that bad, but you'll be lucky to get within arm's length of this kid." She winked, just to let Penelope know she was kidding. She wiped at his cheek with the baby wipe, praying that the gemstone would come off easily.
Carlo scrunched up his face, squalling blue murder as Carmelina scrubbed at his face. The sticker didn't move.
"What is going on in here?" Erin flew from the kitchen with her hands on her hips.
Just then, Mudgie wandered into the fray. He sniffed at Penelope's legs and let out an almighty sneeze, spraying the group.
Erin swooped in, "let me have the baby."
"He's alright, Erin," Carmelina said quickly. "We got it."
"He's not," she snapped, "Otherwise he wouldn't be crying like that."
"He's fine," Penelope said. "I promise, my gemstone landed on him and we're trying to get it off."
"It stuck to his face?" Erin felt like she was speaking to one of her teenagers.
"It was an accident," Carmelina said. "She's good with him."
"Give me the baby," Erin reached for Carlo. Before Penelope could react, Carmelina stepped between her and Strauss.
"He's fine, Erin." Carmelina insisted, "Let me get the sticker off him, then I'll stop bothering him and he'll calm down."
"Move out of my way and give me my baby." Erin's voice was louder than before.
From the kitchen, Dave looked at Hotch. World War Three was going to break out in the living room if they didn't act fast. Apparently, they had the same thought at the same time, because Hotch said, "I'll take Erin, so it doesn't look like you're taking sides." He grabbed a paper towel and wet it with olive oil.
"Fine," Dave said, rushing towards the living room. "I don't want to bail Erin out of jail."
"Or plan Penelope's wake." Morgan said.
"Erin's going to eat them alive," Hotch said. The three of them rushed into the living room.
"My mother's playing Keep-Away, with the baby. I hope Erin would eat her alive." Dave said, stopping at the entrance of the living room.
"Jesus, Ma!" Dave watched Carmelina stand between Erin and Carlo.
"Give my son to his mother." When she didn't do it right away he added, "right now."
Carmelina huffed, threw Dave a dirty look, and did what she was told. "I did successfully raise David, you know."
Erin glared at her mother-in-law. She balanced Carlo in one arm, against her shoulder and held up her index finger with the other. her voice shook slightly with anger. She spoke in a tone that could send snow flurries to Satan's doorstep. "You will never, keep my child from me. The two of you are playing with fire."
"Erin," Hotch walked calmly into the living room, with a paper towel soaked in olive oil. "Can I help?" he came closer as Erin held the screaming baby against her shoulder. Fat, wet tears rolled down Carlo's face.
She looked at Hotch cautiously, "what's on the napkin?"
"Olive oil, from your kitchen."
She nodded and Hotch stooped down slightly. Carlo chewed on his hands, making smacking noises as Hotch spoke to him in a low, soothing voice. "Everything's okay… just a light touch…." In half a second, he swooped his finger under Carlo's eye, leaving the gemstone sticker on the napkin. "Uncle Aaron's got it."
Morgan hummed the theme song to Indiana Jones.
"Thank you," Erin's shoulders relaxed as he put his arm around her shoulders for a second. "I'll take him upstairs."
Dave glanced at the clock on the wall, and walked her to the staircase. "He's probably getting hungry."
"He's wet, too." Erin said.
"No wonder he's upset," Hotch said, very gently ruffling Carlo's hair. "Can't blame a guy for pissed off over wet pants."
"I'd make a joke about being pissed off versus pissed on, but I don't think it'll work here." Dave said.
"Do you want to take him for a second?" Erin offered to Hotch. "I need to bring another box of diapers upstairs."
"Sure." Hotch sat down in a leather armchair across the room and held out his arms.
When Erin was out of earshot, Carmelina spoke her disapproval.
"Why did she let him hold Carlo?" Carmelina threw an ugly look at Hotch, who couldn't care less if he tried. "She screamed at Penelope and I."
"He hasn't had a turn," Dave deflected.
"Neither has Derek," Penelope pointed out.
Derek shook his head, "I'll take the next round when he's got a full belly and dry pants."
"You hugged her," Penelope said, aghast. Seemingly betrayed. "You didn't turn to stone."
"Granite understands marble." Dave said.
"I'm really trying not to take this personally," Carmelina nagged on.
Hotch looked up from Carlo, who was decently content to suck his own fingers. "Maybe," Hotch said, annoyed with the conversation. "She handed him to me because I brought solutions to the problem. She trusts me because I let her stay in control."
"And-" Dave threw in, "he didn't make her feel like crap for wanting to take care of her baby."
The group went silent as Erin came back, took Carlo in her arms and kissed Dave's cheek. Before she headed up the stairs, Mudgie following behind her.
"She's off her rocker," Penelope said. She gave Rossi an imploring look, with tears in her eyes, praying he would believe her. "I would never hurt that baby."
"I know that," Dave laid a hand on her shoulder. "Erin knows that too. She's just…" He glanced towards the staircase. "Carlo's her last baby and I don't blame her for being upset."
"All due respect, Mrs. Rossi," Morgan said, turning to Carmelina, with an expression of shock and being genuinely impressed by her nerve. "Do you have a death wish? Strauss pulled my gun on her mother, when we were looking for Carlo."
Carmelina's mouth opened slightly. "That really happened?" She asked Dave.
"It happened," Dave answered, "and I don't think she regrets it."
"J.J. was never so territorial about Henry," Garcia said.
"Erin acted like we were torturing him," Carmelina snapped. "Goddamn it." She rounded on her son. "Why aren't you more upset about that? I'm your mother and Penelope's your friend. You can't let Erin treat us like the enemy, David."
"Henry wasn't kidnapped at the hospital," Dave said sternly. "J.J. wasn't abducted by her bodyguard when she was pregnant. Erin has every right to want to protect her baby. Nobody should be upset by that." Dave got to his feet, "I'm going to check on them."
Erin sat down on the bed and flipped through the channels of the TV, keeping the volume down low. Carlo seemed to relax immediately against her chest as he ate. She'd changed him into a teal and red outfit that complimented the teal color of her dress.
Maybe she overreacted and removed him from the situation prematurely. Still, he was little and easily overstimulated. The idea made her feel better about herself. Finding nothing on the TV, she laid Carlo in the bassinet, when the plastic bag in the wastebasket beside the bed, caught her eye. Where did that come from? She picked it up and opened it. The pile of folded paper piqued her interest, she grabbed one and unfolded it. She read Dave's tight handwriting.
'Glad to be home.' She tossed it in the wastebasket, he wasn't the only one. Out of curiosity, she grabbed another one, opened it and threw it on the floor. Carmelina's wide, loopy handwriting.
'Carlo was healthy before he was kidnapped. I blame his mother.'
She grabbed another note with numb fingers. Carmelina's handwriting again, 'He wouldn't have been kidnapped if she included me.' Erin laid it to the side and grabbed another, pages and pages of notes. Most of them in her mother-in-law's handwriting. Some were written in Morse code. Erin knew it couldn't be good, if Carmelina felt she had to hide behind a series of dots and dashes. Erin knew she would be better off not knowing, but if she didn't confront it, it would fester and bleed into their lives like an open wound. Carmelina lived with them, she wasn't going away. If there was an unspoken issue, Erin needed to know about it.
She grabbed her phone and pulled up a translator. 'David said she's a drunk…I can see why.'
Erin dropped her phone with her heart in her throat. Just then, there was a sharp knock on the door. Erin's head snapped up, as Dave walked inside the bedroom. "Everything okay in here?" He stepped over to the bassinet to look in on Carlo.
"What is this?" Erin shoved the bag onto the floor, the paper notes fluttered onto the carpet. "Why is your mother writing terrible things about me in a little notebook?"
Dave's mouth went dry. "What do they say?"
"They're bad enough that she wrote it in Morse Code!" She threw a glare at him, "I'm not putting up with this," she got to her feet, shoving the paper in his pocket. "I thought we turned a corner-"
"My mother loves you-" he tried to argue. "This isn't what you think-"
Nobody noticed the baby monitor on the dresser.
Downstairs, Hotch and Morgan milled around the house, nobody was too surprised that Dave had gone upstairs to check on Erin and Carlo and the team was comfortable enough to stay.
Carmelina snatched the baby monitor off the counter and brought it to the living room. Gesturing for the group to gather around the coffee table.
"Does she?" The words came out hot, Erin's throat burned. "Read her fucking notes!" She snatched a pile of paper in her arms, tossing them in the air like confetti. "I can't live like this David, not in my house. If she hates me, I'm fine with that, but she can't hate me in my own home. I knew that you would write about Carlo's abduction. I told myself that I could handle that because that's how you process things, but this-" she grabbed a handful of notes and crunched them in her fist. "All the vitriol, out in the open…" There was a chink in her armor and she didn't like it.
"What?" The mattress dipped as Dave sat on the edge of the bed. "Come sit down and talk about it."
"We shouldn't be listening to this," Derek reached for the baby monitor, ready to turn it off.
"Speak for yourself," Penelope swatted his arm.