Author's Note: This one is a bit shorter than the others, but it was a really good place to stop. I am so glad that people seem to be enjoying this. I hope that it's not dragging on too badly. I'm still getting a feel for these characters, so this is exciting for me. I do hope that you continue to enjoy! Let me know what you think!
Quaritch is pleased with that, enough to let Jake go. Despite how calm his voice was, how crisp his nod was, when Quaritch dismissed him, Jake felt numb. A loud ringing in his ears accompany the pounding of his heart. But he doesn't outwardly react. He knows that men like Quaritch - men like him - thrive on the weakness they illicit from their prey. It's a song and dance that he knows very well.
But as he turns to leave, Quaritch smiles once more, like a secret shared between the two of them. Jake took two steps backward, a part of his brain reverting to an animal mindset. Never turn your back on a predator. He's fallen for a smile like that, many more times than he'll ever care to admit. And it has always come back to haunt him in one capacity or another.
Yes, definitely a game that he knows very well.
But he eventually turns and keeps walking, stiff and eyes darting around frantically. Like even though he left Quaritch behind, sitting on the bench, one hand on his thigh, leaned over with the other one dangling between his knees, a part of Jake somehow expects him to just pop up in front of him after every corner he rounds. Like leaving Quaritch behind was just the other man's attempt to get at Jake when he wasn't paying attention.
Yet somehow, he remains in a state of half calm. He recognizes this feeling. He is familiar with its grip on his throat, and a twisted part of him is relieved to have it. It's a familiar feeling. A cage that he knows well. Quaritch isn't exactly the same, but he is enough for Jake to recognize the confinement.
So long as Jake feels this grip on his throat, then Tommy doesn't.
A sigh of relief pulls from his lips and unbidden, his shoulders relax. His body comforted but his mind still races. Watching every corner. Straining his hearing for heavy footsteps following him. That tingle in the back of his neck whenever he draws near, like years of sensitivity has made Jake evolve to always know. To always have a sense of when he's near.
Or, maybe that is evolution recognizing a predator.
Jake made his way back to his room, discarding all of his things and stripping down to shower. He stands under the spray, frozen, staring at the stark white walls in front of him as the water hits the top of his head and slides down his body in rivets. The water goes from cold to hot to scalding to cold again before he blinks out of the dark grip on his mind. His body is shaking and his shoulder is now pressed against the chilled tiles, but he barely felt any of it.
Jake looks down at the prunes on his fingers and toes, frowning. It feels like he was in here for only a moment. He smooths his wet hair back, washing his body and hair quickly before getting out. He wraps the towel around his waist, not even bothering to look at his reflection in the mirror beside him as he steps out of his bathroom and into his room. He looks up at the window as soon as he steps into the room and stops.
The floating bulbus thing is hovering outside the window, dancing around on the outside sill. He slowly steps closer to the window, leaning over the desk slightly to stare at it through the glass. It dances a bit before slowing to tiny bounces in front of his face.
Once more, Jake leans close, staring into its body. Once more, it's like he's being pulled in. Like falling into the stars, glowing brighter and brighter and brighter. But they were also shifting and fluctuating. Jake feels himself falling, slowly. Like all of his weight is pressed onto the tips of his toes as he falls deeper into the light. His mind slowly starts to clear. His thoughts, his feelings, it all slowly falling away. Like water slipping through his fingers.
Eyes drooping, mind freeing.
It's like falling into stars, and the further he falls, the more his body relaxes. His shoulders loosen, his mind clearing more and more. It's like the blinking, shifting lights are growing brighter and brighter, taking on a life of their own. At the edge of his mind, Jake feels something. A warmth that runs along the back of his head and down his spine. It feels like every nerve ending in his body starts to tingle. More and more, until his body is vibrating. Pulsating on its own.
And then, there is a pounding. A deep, thumping that at first feels like it's at the edge of hearing. But gradually it grows stronger and stronger, until Jake's skin is vibrating with the thumping. His heart matching it, pounding as hard as it until it feels like the entire planet at his feet is echoing this sound, this thumping... this beat. A pulsing in his skin, and in the skin of the planet around him.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
The lights pulse. The bulbus body dances. His heart pounds. And then everything goes black.
Jake opens his eyes to find himself laying on the floor of his bedroom on his back. Nothing hurts, thankfully, but it feels like he fell backwards. He's lucky that it doesn't feel like he cracked his head on the corner of the desk or hit the ground hard enough to concuss himself. Once more, nothing hurts. No headache. No pounding of his heart. He feels fine. Just groggy.
His skin is dry, but his hair is still damp. Jake sits up slowly, rubbing at the back of his head. Still no pain. Although there is a strange feeling in his brain, like he fell into a deep sleep for too long to be a nap, but not long enough to be proper sleep. He feels heavy, lethargic. That's not too different from how he's been feeling - especially without sleep. Or at least proper sleep. But still no pain.
Cautiously, Jake climbs to his feet, picking the towel that unraveled around him at some point, and looks out the window to see that the bulbus little thing is gone once more. He leans in closer to look around. He can see people milling about, walking the perimeter, observing the fence. Watch towers without their bright beams of light shining off into the forest - it's too bright for that now. Tending to what looks like a garden off on the far side, almost out of his view. It appears peaceful.
Jake jolts, realizing that he's running out of time. He needs to get to the cafeteria and get something to eat before he makes his way to the labs. He doesn't want to be late, but he also wants to try to be as prepared as possible. He can already feel his anxiety spike once more. He quickly pulls away from the window and heads for the small dresser, getting dressed as quick as possible. Grabbing everything he needs - and coming back after taking three steps out of his room to grab the manual just in case - he heads out.
Jack races to get lunch, noting that he had spent almost forty minutes between the shower and whatever little nap - nap? - that happened to him, forcing a few bites, feeling lethargic and weakened. He's not necessarily not used to this feeling. It all brings him back to that place. To that house. With that man. But he survived back then, and he can survive this.
Jake knew he was a lot of things, but more than most of the other things that he knows that he is, he knows that he's a survivor. And he knew that made him strong.
Tommy needed him to be strong, so he was. He would fight through heaven and earth, walk through fire, brave the wonders and terrors of Pandora, for Tommy.
Because Tommy was worth it. Without question. Without complaint.
So, he snarfed down what he could stomach of lunch, throw away the rest, before following the directory and signs written on the walls to the science labs on the opposite side of the complex from where he usually operates. No wonder he never just runs into Tommy during the day.
Norm and Tommy were right inside the main lab to greet Jake as soon as he stumbled into them, dazed and turned around in the maze that led him here, with panic in their eyes and a shake of their heads.
Jake's eyes widen and he shakes his head back at them, arms spread in confusion. "What? What's wrong?"
"Please tell me you read the manual," Norm says quickly.
"Uh, define 'read'?"
Norm pales slightly while Tommy smacks his forehead with the palm of his hand in a painful crack. "Did you even bother to open it up at all?"
Jake nods, cringing at the sound that Tommy's forehead made. "Of course."
"Did you read any of it, then?"
"I... looked at the pictures. Does that count?" A pause then, "Maybe I skimmed a little bit, too."
"Maybe?" Tommy echoes, lowering his hand to reveal a red mark on the center of his forehead. "What does that mean?"
Jake hesitates, eyeing the mark. "It was a lot of words in a very small font."
"Jake!" Tommy groans while Norm rubs at the back of his neck. The two of them share a look that makes Jake very self-conscious because he doesn't understand it. On one hand, it's nice that Tommy is making a friend that he's close with - and even the bare minimum amount of time that Jake has known him, Jake does like Norm well enough, he seems like a nice friend to have - but on the other hand, he hates that he has no idea what that look means. Aside from the guess that it's probably disappointment.
Feeling that he has to offer something to his own defense, he says, quietly, "I've had a really long last few days. I'm sorry." He rubs at his forehead, shamed. "What's wrong?"
"Children!" A woman snaps when Norm opens his mouth. He snaps it shut immediately as a tall, red headed woman rounds the corner. Her dark eyes finding the three of them immediately. She comes to a halt, annoyance written across her face as she crosses her arms over her chest.
Norm flinches while Tommy offers a little wave. Both of them carefully greet, "Doctor Augustine."
A slightly shorter man steps up next to Grace, offering all three of them a friendly smile, sympathy written across his face as he looks back at Grace.
"We sort of knew this was coming," he offers placatingly.
Doctor Augustine glares at him. "It is bad enough that they send me fresh faced college graduates who spent the night before coming here out drinking with their 'bros'," she throws her voice and makes air quotes. One of the young technicians behind her flinches. "But now they send me actual children. Two seventeen-year-old boys?"
"Tom has been with us since the drop," the man says kindly, seemingly used to handling Grace. "And he's brilliant. I'm sure his brother is the same."
Jake flinches at that, willing to be the first to admit that from being the furthest from the truth, while Tommy is quick to jump to his defense. "Jake is brilliant, Doctor Augustine. Just give him time to prove it to you."
Hearing Tommy defend him while Jake looks extremely guilty, Grace frowns, eyes homing in on the identical twin of the young man that just started working for her, the only distinguishable difference between them, aside from clothes, is Jake's hair is shorter. Otherwise, they are completely identical. It has been many years since Grace herself has seen twins in any form, identical or not, and never on Pandora.
"Not much to say, do you, Sully?" She asks, leaning back on her hips.
"Plenty," Tom says, frowning.
"No, ma'am," Jake says at the same time. Both brothers look at one another. Tommy displeased while Jake just shrugs it off.
He's happy that his brother is defending him and all, but it's pointless. Jake is very clear on how this is all going to go. He has no delusions or misconceptions. He is going to offer himself as manual labor and that's about the extent of his contribution to this whole thing.
Grace huffs, shaking her head. "Have you logged any lab hours? At all?"
"I dissected a frog once?"
Grace stares holes through him. "Are you asking me or telling me?"
"...telling?"
Tommy and Norm both flinch, the man beside Grace smiles at him, still with sympathy, while Grace groans, running her hands through her hair in frustration.
"I wanted time, Max," Grace says, turning to the man next to her. "I wanted to build my school and be able to get closer to the Omatikaya before the RDA come and screw it all up!"
"They aren't screwing anything up," Max protests kindly, and Jake can't help but like him. Even if it's only a little bit. Maybe not everyone is bad here. Even with her attitude and annoyance, Jake doesn't dislike Grace either. She seems like she's just annoyed and stressed out since no one seems to be telling her things that obviously matter. Jake can understand the frustration.
Plus, Jake doesn't have problems with women. In his life, at least, women have never been his problem. It's always been men. Thankfully, most of the security seems fine - ish - and Jake doesn't mind Norm or this Max-guy yet. Maybe he just had another rough start.
"They probably didn't ask to be put in this situation," Max says, placatingly to Grace. "Besides, you were going to need to introduce the kids to our own youth at some point."
"It's only been four months since I was able to get the approval for my school," Grace sighs. "Four months isn't a long time. They are all still adjusting. Sure, the older kids are picking up English pretty quick, but they are all still so ignorant to us - as we are of them. I want to keep them preserved for as long as possible."
Tommy stares at her, contemplatively. "We aren't going to screw up anything for you, Doctor Augustine. Besides, between Jake and I, there isn't any need to preserve anything. We're good."
Grace doesn't look at all convinced. She just groans again, shaking her head. "We have to get you two into your Avatars and make sure everything is running smoothly, anyway. We will see just how much a pain in my ass the two of you will be."
"Doctor Augustine?"
Grace sighs, turning around to face the Sully boy in front of her. It takes her a moment to place that this was Tom's brother. Not Tom. But she doesn't remember his name. Barely remembered Tom's.
Unlike Tom and Norm who are staring in wonder at the tanks with their avatars inside - two, side by side that are identical copies of one another - the other brother barely spared them a glance. His face is even and smooth, not wide-eyed and glowing like his brother. This brother, his entire body seems... small. His shoulders are rolled back, posture rigid, but pulled tight. He's keeping form, but almost trying to compact himself as much as possible.
Even his voice is lower, softer than Tom's, which was rising higher in pitch with his excitement over this brother's shoulder. He slapped at Norm's shoulder, talking about what he's excited to see in his avatar form - him and Norm, both glowing in excitement. This brother is much more somber and quiet.
Guess Tom was the radiant of the two of them.
"What?" Grace asks, still annoyed once more about the higher-ups just sticking their noses where they don't belong. Max sighs to her side, silently reminding her that it wasn't the Sullys faults that they were here.
"I know we still have to practice and learn about our avatars and stuff..." the brother says slowly, eyes landing on her cheek and staying there. "But I was really hoping to not go to the school."
Grace blinks in surprise, not having expected that. "Oh?"
The brother nods. "Yeah, Tommy will do good. He'll be able to help with whatever you need in that."
"And what will you be doing?" Grace asks, curiously, crossing her arms and really looking at the young man in front of her.
He won't meet her eyes - or anyone's. He's quiet and demure. And he looks... exhausted. There are purpling marks under his eyes, and now that she's staring at him with clearer eyes, she can see a paleness to him that doesn't appear to be from lack of the sun. He should be tanner than his brother, and he does appear to be... but there is something akin to sickness about him. But he had to go through scans to get here and it would have pinged if he had a cold. These are sterile environments.
"I was hoping for... labor?" The brother says quietly. "I can actually do that."
"Where you... not good in school?" Grace asks slowly, staring at the even expression of the young man in front of her. Warning bells in her head going off. Max glances at her, noting the slight softening of her tone.
"I was fine, not like Tommy," the brother says.
Grace stares at him, hard, trying to decipher the feeling that is building in her chest. "You know we aren't going through college courses, right? Most of it is elementary and middle school level. At least for now. The bulk of my kids are very young, the handful that are older than ten still need to learn those basics. It's not like it's going to be anything too difficult."
The brother hesitates, eyes lowering to the floor, like looking at her face has become too hard for him. "I know. I just... would rather not be there."
"Are you scared of the Na'vi?" Max asks. Normally, Grace would be annoyed by that question. She knows that people are - a lot, actually - but this was their home! Humans were the aliens. But watching Jake closely, his demeanor didn't even slightly shift. His face remaining calm and even, and his eyes on the floor.
"No, sir," the brother says. "But Doctor Augustine is right. I'll screw this up for you. Tommy won't, though."
Grace stares at him, trying to fight the coiling in her chest. Those warning bells blaring now at those words.
"You can't know that," Max says, kindly. "Besides, this is new for everyone. Growing pains are expected."
The brother doesn't respond, just stares at the floor until Tommy turns, calling out, "Jake! Come and see your avatar!"
"Okay," the brother - Jake - says to the floor, slightly turning toward his brother and Norm, both of which are watching him. He turns slightly back toward Max and Grace. "Just... think about it," he says, before turning and heading over to the other two boys. Jake stops next to Tommy, quietly listening to his brother and Norm ramble on and on, his eyes vacantly staring ahead, almost unseeing.
Someone, on the other side of the room, drops some with a loud clang, making most people in the room jump. Except for Jake. He stands, unmoving, eyes lowered to the floor, eyes closed. His shoulders, slightly tense - or tenser than they were earlier - relax back to that slightly tense state once more. He opens his eyes and nods at the muttering that Tommy sends his way.
Grace frowns at that, glancing over at Max, who is already making his way over to the source of the noise, seeing if there was something he could do to help. Grace glances back over at the Sully brothers and Norm. Jake's eyes are open once more, his expression smooth and his gaze is distant. If Grace wasn't actively looking for him, it's almost like he could disappear into the space, unnoticed.
And Grace wondered, in that moment, if he would disappear altogether as soon as she turns away.
"Don't be scared," Tommy says, half glancing over his shoulder as they walk.
"Okay," Jake says back, trailing behind his brother.
Tommy rolls his eyes. "We are just going to check to see if we can even make the jump into our avatars. Maybe even get to walk around outside or something. Wouldn't that be cool?"
"I do that every day," Jake says, following behind Tommy and Norm who were on Max's heels as he leads them through to the transfer chambers, where all their pods are waiting for them.
Tommy sends him a droll look. "Don't rub it in."
They're killing time while their avatars are being removed from the vats and placed on medical gurneys in one of the further rooms. Thankfully there was no test that Jake had to take in order to get into the avatar, but he felt awfully lost on how they were supposed to pilot them until Norm leaned in close while Max was explaining something about mind referencing and something about Jake and Tommy needing to go separately just in case something goes array, to tell him how the pods work. As they have never had two genetically identical people jumping into an avatar and they just want to take every precaution until they have some better understanding.
Apparently, the pods are calibrated for the avatars, but they don't seem to want to take any sort of risk, despite that. That's okay. Jake doesn't really mind. He's not as excited as Tommy and Norm were.
"Okay, so we have another few minutes," Max says stopping by a bunch of the pods, clapping his hands together. "Any questions?"
"Yes," Tommy says, giving his hand a little wave, to which Max smiles giving a slight nod for him to continue, "Is there anything we should be looking for? I mean, I know we can't do a lot in the transfer itself, but I imagine we are going to feel differently as avatars, but anything we should be looking out for or anything?"
Max's eyes brighten. "That is an excellent question, Tom. Yes, it's important to communicate. Transferring between your body and your avatar should be seamless and near instantaneous. A bridge has already been formed through the machine, but you'll need to foster one in your own neural network and for many people, that first transfer brings about headaches, nausea, nose bleeds, and even dizziness and vomiting. So, make sure you're aware and keep communications with the care techs open. They are there to help you. The first time is always the hardest, but it gets easier after that."
"Are these symptoms common?" Norm asks, leaning up against a rail between Jake and Tommy.
Max nods. "Most of the time it's headaches, but we have seen the others. Every person is different. But some people make the transfer without any sort of issue at all. And you don't have to worry. I'll be here monitoring your brain activity the whole time to ensure that you're doing okay. If anything dire starts to happen, I can pull you from the link. I don't recommend it as it can be quite traumatic, so if you can pass back through the link yourself, I would recommend that instead."
"And it's as simple as clearing your mind?" Tommy reiterates, and Jake is grateful, especially when his brother sends him a knowing look.
"Yep," Max says, nodding. "Any other questions?"
While Norm and Tommy ask a few more questions, Jake glances around the room, watching as people bustle back and forth. On monitors around the room, Jake can see people in the machines, eyes closed but twitching. Like they were deeply dreaming.
He spots Grace making her way across the room to her own pod, speaking with the tech for a moment before climbing in and pulling a rack down across her chest while the tech latches it in place and closes the lid on her. The monitor next to her lights up with her image, eyes closed, and vitals start appearing beneath her feed, mapping what appears to be blood pressure, heart rate and brain activity. Jake has no idea what is what but has spied on enough medical shows to at least guess.
"Okay, Jake," Tommy says, pulling Jake's eyes back over to him. "You want to go first, or me?"
"You can, if you want," Jake offers.
Tommy grins brightly, face morphing into joy. "Perfect! I'll see you in there, okay?"
Jake nods. "Good luck."
Tommy claps his hands together in excitement before following after Max to one of the beds, hopping in and listening to Max reiterate instructions. "Head down, close your eyes, clear your mind." Tommy obeys and disappears when the door closes over the top of him. Max waits for the machine to start humming before glancing over at the monitor. Tommy's face, eyes closed, appears, and so does those vitals. There is a subtle dip and then it stabilizes.
Max smiles, pleased, mumbling, "Transfer sequence, ten seconds. Good," before moving to the next one to help Norm in.
Once Norm was latched in place and the lid closed, he did the same. He watched the monitor, the vitals, before nodding again, pleased. Once more, quietly, and if Jake wasn't standing right there, he probably wouldn't have heard him, Max says, "Even better. Four seconds." Then he turned to Jake, smiling.
"You ready?"
Jake nods, following him over to the pod on the other side of Norm, slowly lowering himself into the cold gelatinous interior, his skin prickling at the feeling. Max smiles sympathetically at the sight of his goosebumps.
"It'll warm up quickly, promise."
Jake nods again. "Okay."
Max brings the rack down across his chest before pausing. He purses his lips for a second before turning his dark eyes down to Jake. "Listen, Jake, I'm sorry about Grace. She didn't really mean what she said."
He highly doubted that. Grace doesn't appear to be the type of person who pulls her punches. "It's okay," Jake says instead, though, offering a little shrug. "She has the right to be upset."
Max's smile softens a touch. "Thanks for saying that, but really. She shouldn't have laid that on you guys. She's stressed, but that isn't an excuse. Don't let her get to you, okay? She means well, even if it doesn't always seem like it."
Yes, Jake's first impression of the man appeared to be right. He certainly knew how to deal with Grace. They must have been working together for a long time. Or at least long enough for him to know how to handle the after-effects to her actions. Her words. How to read her actions. How to soften the blow left behind. Regardless, Max didn't need to apologize to him. He understood.
But instead of all of that, Jake simply says, "Okay."
Max's smile strains for a moment before he asks, quietly, "You really don't have a lot to say, huh?"
Why does everyone always ask him that? He feels like he talks too much most of the time. That's why it's easier with Tommy around. Tommy can draw all the attention and effortlessly work it, like he was born to. Jake just stumbles and tumbles his way through a conversation. It's just better if Tommy does all the talking.
But, same as always, Jake responds, "No, sir."
A look flickers across Max's face for a split second, before it clears and he nods, smiling again. "Well, I'll see you on the other side, okay? Just keep your head down, close your eyes and clear your mind. Good luck, Jake."
"Thanks," Jake says, watching the hood of the machine come down over the top of him, bathing him in near darkness, with just faint blinking lights around him. Jake looks around, wondering how someone would be able to do this if they were claustrophobic. Then again, it's either overcome your fears or not do it, he supposes. The blinking lights kind of remind him of the bulbus thing that keeps appearing outside his window. At some point, he's going to have to pull Tommy aside and ask him what it is.
"Are you okay, Jake?" Max asks from outside the pod.
"Yes, sorry," Jake says, closing his eyes and clearing his mind. At first, there was nothing but darkness and the sound of his own breathing. And then, at the furthest reaches of sound, beneath the soft beeping of machines and the chittering of scientists and techs, beyond the hum of the machine he's in and the ones around him, and even the beat of his own heart, there is a soft pounding.
Thump.
Thump.
Thump.
Calling like a siren to him. And behind Jake's eyelids, he sees stars. And he falls up into them.