After Zeke invited Melody, Truett, and me to Golden Gate Park with C.J. and him, he texted me the information. I texted him once or twice to ensure he was OK with the party and didn't need help, but that was it, which was fine in my book. The less contact we had, the easier it was to keep my guard up, and the happier Sharpay would be too.

Zeke texted me the day of the party with pictures and videos. A warm feeling filled me watching the videos of my friends hanging out like we used to. It was great hearing their voices and seeing everyone together. Everyone was happy, and knowing I was a part of the why gave me the best feeling.

Troy handed Aspen the piñata stick, "OK, A, whack it as hard as you can."

Aspen took the stick from Troy and happily started swinging.

I chuckled, watching Aspen attack the pinata. A part of me wished I was there in person with my friends laughing and celebrating.

Knock Knock Knock

"What are you watching," Javier asked, peeking in.

I paused the video and looked up from my laptop. "Just some of the videos that Zeke sent me today. Most of them are uploaded onto my laptop; I'm uploading the last of it now, along with the pictures."

I scootched over and made room for him on the bed. He peeked at my screen when he took a seat. "Aspen sure has grown."

I looked back at the screen, and my spirit fell a little, "she sure has. Zeke says she's a dynamite now. Funny, active, and full of spirit."

"Three years is a lot of time for someone to change," Javier noted, "You've changed too."

I sighed, "It's just I always knew when I decided to leave, I'd be missing out; until I ran back into Zeke, I didn't realize how much or that I'd miss it all as much as I do."

Javier lay on his stomach next to me, "and every time you feel like you're ready to let them in, you chicken out at the last second."

I nodded slowly, "yeah, every time. They're my friends, and I should trust them as much as I trust Teagan or Blakely, but I don't."

"That kind of trust doesn't come so easily, but you have a lifetime, so I know you'll get there one day," Javier encouraged, "in the meantime talking to one of your friends again is a step forward."

"Then why doesn't it feel that way," I grumbled, "why do I keep second-guessing myself, and why does it feel like I'm making one giant mistake after another and everything will blow up in my face?"

Javier chuckled, wrapping me in a comforting hug, "Because, my sweet baby sister, you lack self-confidence and let your fears get the better of you."

I scrunched my nose and shut my laptop, "is there a fix?"

"There's no magic wand or potion, but it gets a bit easier each time you face your fears."

I sat up and placed my laptop on my desk, "speaking of fears, I didn't cancel on Zeke like I thought about doing. So are you and Rosie really OK with me taking True to Golden Gate Park tomorrow?"

Javier sat beside me, "Rosie isn't mad at you; she just thinks that maybe you should tell Zeke the truth, and so do I. Zeke might have made his own assumptions, but that doesn't make it right."

I blew out a breath and pulled my knee closer, "I don't want to second-guess who my friends are. I've done enough of that to last a lifetime."

"Aren't you kind of already doing that every time you question if you could let them in," Javier reasoned.

I rested my chin on my knee, "I guess."

Javier brushed a strand of my hair from my eyes, "Sounds like either way, you'd have the same problem. So why not take a chance; you may be surprised."

A yawn escaped me as the day's events started catching up with me. I leaned closer toward him and laid my head on his shoulders. My body relaxes, and I shut my eyes before whispering. "I wish I had your courage and confidence."

Javier wrapped his arm tight around me in a side hug, "you are so much more than you give yourself credit for."

I could barely hear what Javier was saying when I felt myself starting to drift off, feeling completely safe in Javier's arms. The last thing I remember was Javier wishing me a good night before sleep took over.

I was too sick to be nervous the following morning. My morning sickness started kicking in recently, and Tuesday just wasn't one of my better mornings. I knew Zeke would understand if I canceled. But since neither Truett nor Melody attends daycare, they don't get to meet many other children their age that they aren't related to. This was something that would be good for them, and I was looking forward to meeting C.J. in person.

We were running late when I finally arrived at Golden Gate Park with Meldy and Truett in tow. Zeke was already there with C.J., waiting for us. Melody recognized him right away and started repeating his name.

I felt like I was throwing myself into the lion's den again as I walked over to him. Taking a breath, I reminded myself it was OK, and I didn't have to tell Zeke anything I wasn't ready to. Burying my anxious thoughts deep inside me, I put an extra spring in my step before Melody and Truett started squirming, and keeping them on my hip became impossible.

"There are two of my favorite twins," Zeke greeted, approaching us. He greeted me and hugged me hello, "You two must have gotten bigger since the last time I saw you."

Melody and Truett giggled, shaking their heads. C.J. started imitating them, giving us both a laugh. When they stopped, I got a really good look at C.J. for the first time. I had expected C.J. to look like Chad from the pictures that Zeke had shown me, but to see how much they looked alike in person was different.

"You little munchkin must be C.J.," I shook his tiny hands, "I'm glad to finally meet you."

C.J. grinned, showing me his little basketball, "bwet bwall."

"I see he didn't only get Chad's looks, but his love for basketball too."

Zeke agreed, "not to mention the talent. He's pretty good for being only two."

"So, is there a grand plan for today?" I adjusted Truett on my hip.

Zeke shook his head, "Nah, I just figured we'd walk around. If they make it to the park inside the park with energy left, they could burn some energy there. Maybe we can even take them for a spin on the carousel."

I didn't see any problems with that idea, "sounds good," I agreed.

Zeke and I set the kids down to let them start burning energy out. The second we did, C.J. immediately took Melody's hand and toddled off as fast as his little legs could carry him. I couldn't hold in my happy chuckle watching them. They were so cute, and I could envision them being best friends, just like their dads.

Melody quickly grabbed Truett's hand, tugging him behind her. For a couple of two-year-olds in a human chain, they were moving pretty fast. Zeke and I had to make an effort to keep up with them.

"I'm surprised that C.J. is getting along well with Melody. It's like she's his best friend," Zeke noted, watching C.J. chatter away with Melody. "He's not usually such a chatterbox."

Guilt struck me hard as I watched C.J. and Melody. If only Zeke knew the truth, he wouldn't be so surprised. I wanted to tell him the truth, but nothing came out when I opened my mouth.

I shut my mouth and racked my brain for a topic I was interested in. "What's C.J. usually personality like?"

"C.J.," Zeke repeated, looking at him, "shy and quiet. Picture the opposite of what you're seeing now, and you've pretty much hit the nail on the head."

Curiosity replaced the guilt I was feeling, turning my gaze to them. They were so sweet together and reminded me so much of what my parents were like and what my siblings and in-laws were like. Could C.J. and Melody be sole mates, I thought, watching them together.

"That's quite a change," I noted.

"Yeah, Taylor and Chad tried putting him in a playgroup just before he turned two, and it was an epic fail," Zeke went on, "are True and Melody in a playgroup?"

"Not yet," I answered, "Melody's not quite there."

Zeke raised a brow, "and True?"

I bit my lip searching for a way to explain, "Javy's considering it."

"And you're not," Zeke was still trying to understand.

"We talk about it," I answered, "I just feel I should listen in this case."

Zeke nodded, "mind if I ask if it's easier for you not to worry about playgroup since the twins always have a playmate?"

I glanced at Melody and Truett, "yeah, the fact that both have so many cousins to play with does have its perks."

Zeke looked at me like I had just spoken to him in a different language, and I realized I had spoken out loud. I was sure that Zeke wanted me to elaborate, but I didn't dare to make a move. I waited to see a cue from him. I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding when Zeke moved on, walking faster so he was right next to Truett.

I walked a little faster to catch up with him. "So, uuuhhhh, I wanted to say thanks for sending me those videos and photos of Sharpay's party; it uuuuhhhhh…..it really meant a lot."

Zeke shoved his hands in his pockets and relaxed, "Of course, the party wouldn't have been possible without all your help. Since you couldn't be there in person, it's the least I could do."

I kicked the pebble in front of me, "is Sharpay still mad at you?"

"She was," he admitted, "but she mellowed out since I told her you were married with kids."

I opened my mouth to protest but shut it again when I lost my nerve. I glanced at the kids, who were still playing like they were best friends. "Let's take them to ride that carousel," I suggested, "I think they really enjoy it."

"Sure, but any idea how to get there," Zeke asked, stopping C.J. from going ahead. "I've only ever been here a handful of times, and I've only heard of the carousel. I've never actually been there."

I looked around the park at the scenery and people passing by us, trying to figure out exactly where we were in the park. Maybe if I knew, I'd know which direction we needed to go. I wasn't having much luck, though.

Mimi used to bring my siblings and me here all the time growing up. We would beg her to let us ride the carousel at least once when she brought us here. But that was years ago, and now I wasn't sure I remembered where it was exactly.

I ran a hand through my hair. "I'll check the map; you OK to keep an eye on the kids?"

Zeke nodded, "go for it," he agreed.

I glanced up from the map I was studying when I heard Melody giggling. Zeke had C.J.'s basketball and showed the kids moves that got them pumped and made them laugh. I couldn't hold back a laugh as I watched Zeke fake a shot.

Sounds like either way, you'd have the same problem. So why not take a chance; you may be surprised.

Melody's giggle turned into all-out laughter when C.J. started pulling them around in a circle like they were playing a ring around the rosie.

Zeke turned away for a second and glanced in my direction, "You ok?" He called over.

I was about to answer him when I noticed that Melody was turning pale and froze where she was. I frowned, realizing a more significant problem when C.J. continued to pull Truett and Melody.

"No!" I cried, reaching out when C.J. stumbled backward, "Zeke, behind you!"

"Huh," Zeke turned in confusion.

Zeke's eyes bugged out, but before either of us could do anything, all three kids went down like dominos. Knowing we'd need medical assistance, my hands automatically went to my cell phone as I ran for Melody and Truett.

"Hey Elly, what's going on," Javier picked up when I got to Truett and Melody.

"I need medical assistance," I blurted out, trying desperately to remain calm but failing when I realized all three were cold.

"What happened," he asked, confusion and worry in his voice, "Why do you need medical assistance?"

I sighed and took a breath before trying again, "The kids all fell when they were playing and are now out cold."

"I'm sending some ambulances," Javier replied, "Meet them outside in five minutes if you can. If not, have Zeke meet the ambulance outside so he can guide them."

"Javy," I whispered, hating having to admit that something could be wrong with Melody, "Melody was having trouble breathing and turning pale just before she fell."

I could hear Javier whispering and talking on the other end of the line, "OK, I'm on my way with Bridge in one of the ambulances. In the meantime, see if you can slow the bleeding by tieing a piece of clothing around the area they're bleeding from before trying to meet us outside."

I nodded but quickly realized he couldn't see me, "OK."

I handed Zeke the scarf in my hand as I ended the call. Swallowing the lump that formed in my throat, I related Javier's instructions to Zeke. Zeke quickly tied the scarf around C.J.'s head and helped me with Melody and Truett's injuries.

Zeke tied the final knot around Truett's cut knee, "OK, I think that about does it. So, how are we going to get them outside?"

I glanced at Melody again and realized for the first time that C.J. was holding her hands. A slight feeling of warmth edged in with the concern and anxiety. "Uuuhhh, we can carry them; you take Melody and C.J., and I'll take Truett."

Zeke didn't protest and quickly followed behind me. As soon as we were outside, Zeke called Chad to let him know what had happened. I held onto Melody and Truett's hands as I muttered to myself. I was so focused on my fears I didn't notice Zeke approaching me.

I jumped, startled by Zeke's touch, "Taylor and Chad are meeting us at the hospital. Everything is going to be OK; accidents happen all the time."

The thought of the worst-case scenario shook me to my core. I appreciated Zeke for trying but didn't understand how serious this could be for Melody. I said a silent prayer, hoping Zeke was right. I barely finished my prayer before Melody's breathing turned shallow, like she was struggling to breath. Melody was taking a turn for the worse.

Bridge, Javy, please hurry. Melody needs medical assistance now.

The sound of sirens approaching was music to my ear. Bridgette emerged from the first ambulance and quickly took control of the situation, instructing everyone on what to do.

Javier dropped to his knee beside Melody and dug in a medical bag, "Bridge, is True stable?"

"He has a deep cut and probably hit his head, but he's stable for now." She answered.

Javier tilted his head back, groaning in frustration, "I need help intubating Melody; I can't get the tube down her throat."

Bridgette took the stuff from Javier and ran the tube down Melody's throat again. After a long moment, Bridgette said, "OK, Bud, I'm in; start bagging her. I'll check on C.J. while you get her into the ambulance."

The EMTs wrapped everything up, and we piled into the ambulance. Zeke stayed with C.J. in one ambulance. Bridgette and I were with Truett in another, and Melody was with Javier in the last ambulance. Why didn't you say something the second you noticed Melody was sick? Maybe you could have prevented this.