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by CrazyBellatrix13

Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

48. 81 Avatar

Zuko was often surprised by the number of things that went unsaid between him and his closest friends. Going so long without friends had been hard for him growing up, especially when he was a teenager, his only real goal was one of revenge and pain. Even Jet, when he had met him in Ba Sing Se, was almost an afterthought to Zuko. It wasn't until he was picking up his pillow and moving to the group cuddle pile at the Western Air Temple, planting himself squarely in the middle so everyone could leech off his body heat, them immediately grabbing for him, Toph's crazy hair tickling his neck and Sokka's snores resounding in the amplified space, did he really understand the wordFriend.

The meaning had changed for him over the years, arguably. It had gone from being "someone who fights in a war with you" to "someone who helps you destroy half your dad's old shitty beach house in anger" to "someone who genuinely? Cares about you? And your wellbeing?" to "someone who is there for you, no matter what, no questions asked." To Zuko, it was the most beautiful thing in his life besides the turtle-duck pond that rested easily in the middle of his mother's garden. He cherished his friends and everything they were.

He ached for them when he was alone in the Fire Nation, the weight of the world and his family's mistakes heavy on his shoulders. He had gone so long without friends and now that he had them, he struggled to let them go be their own people. Eventually, everyone had left on different missions, even the Kyoshi Warriors who had pledged themselves to his service, bidding him farewell and good luck now that there had been four years into his reign and his Fire Nation guards could be trusted implicitly.

Aang continued to travel the world as a nomad. Katara was joining him half the time she wasn't working on the Southern Water Tribe and the new batch of Southern waterbenders that had been newly born. Toph was out causing chaos, sometimes visiting him for brief amounts of time before disappearing once more into the depths of the Earth Kingdom. Suki was training new Kyoshi warriors on her home island and when she wasn't, she was traveling around giving fighting demonstrations and lectures.

After five years, only Sokka remained a constant in his life. At first, he was splitting his time 3:1 at the Southern Water tribe rebuilding and planning and the other part in the Fire Nation with Zuko. Slowly his time moved to be 50:50, helping Zuko pick up on many of the duties that he struggled with alone, his ministers and advisors none the wiser to his inadequacy because he wouldn't let them near. It was only after Zuko realized that Sokka had missed his fourth ship out of the Fire Nation and had spent every bit of ten months with him, that he decided to appoint Sokka with the official Ambassador title. To be fair he had already been doing most of those duties of his free will, Zuko trying (and failing) to offer Sokka some form of pay for the work. Zuko told him in no uncertain terms that if he didn't get on the next ship for his home, he would be getting an Agniforsaken paycheck as an employee, or Zuko would fry him alive. Sokka, stubbornly, stayed in the Fire Nation and attended the banquet where several (rather confused) officials and fellow Ambassadors greeted him with open arms. Zuko assumed their confusion came when they realized he had notalreadybeen an Ambassador. After all, he was taking over more than half of Zuko's meetings forfun?

As the fifth year anniversary of the end of the war came, Zuko was practically vibrating with anticipation. He had Sokka plan months in advance. It wasn't like he hadn't seen his friends in a long time. They had just recently met for Aang and Katara's wedding, only a year ("it was two, actually," Sokka said to him during their planning, sitting on the arm of his chair and leaning over Zuko's notes) prior and everyone had been together forthat. The difference was that the wedding had a lot of tradition from both Aang's Airbender roots and Katara's Water Tribe customs, and after all the fanfare was done Zuko realized he had spent a total of an hour at most actually talking with his friends where he didn't feel like he was being tied to a steel rod.

They spent plenty of time writing letters. Hawkey was Zuko's third favorite person and Sokka let him borrow him all the time, even though he had Firelord official hawks that may have been faster. But every time he used Hawkey, Sokka swore he had to give the bird a kiss goodbye, and sometimes he went out of his way to write extra letters just to spend that extra minute with Sokka.

This time, in person, Zuko was determined to have a good time. Originally he had been hesitant, sure that it would be like any other festival the Fire Nation held. But the more he planned with Sokka and got the details out (and they spent alotof time, late at night, pouring over plans and maps and schedules) the more he got really, truly excited to see his friends. Sokka, ever the plan guy, made sure to take into account every possible thing that could go wrong. His plans had plans. Their friends were expected to come a week before the festival and stay atleasta week afterward, with plenty of wiggle room for them to stay longer if they wished. The festival itself was around three days (symbolic of the amount of time between Aang leaving Ember Island and defeating Ozai) and had a parade, countless food stands, displays of bending and reenactments, and even a ball. The ball was a formality with all of the royal leaders, but everything else was sure to be much more relaxing. Even when Zuko voiced his concern about having to be the presentable Firelord in front of everyone during the whole thing, Sokka assured him (with a brush of his fingers through Zuko's long black hair) that they would have plenty of timearoundthe festival regardless.

So yeah. Zuko was excited. His excitement seemed to be amplified by Sokka, who loved taking any opportunity to see his sister. Zuko reasoned that the siblings had never been apart from each other in their lives until after the war. Now they spent a shocking amount of time away from one another, but he guessed that came with the territory when one of your siblings found their person.

He was talking about Katara of course. The love that radiated off of those two was almost lethal.

There, standing on the great steps of the Dragon Palace, Sokka stood next to Zuko and waited for the steadily growing sky bison to touch down.

A loud groan sounded from Appa as both of the men ran down the steps (gracefully. With pride. With dignity) to meet them. Zuko's head cocked to the side as he realized there were four people in the saddle, not two. Toph immediately catapulted from her place in the saddle, landing face-first with a big kiss onto the stone palace courtyard. Suki followed, laughing behind her, leaning over the side and flipping out to stand next to her. She was in normal Earth kingdom clothes- a fitted tunic and some plain pants rather than her usual Kyoshi uniform. Zuko didn't doubt it was with her bags.

Aang airbended himself out of the worn leather saddle, getting into position and offering a hand to Katara, who leaned over in preparation, a big smile on her face. Once she was down, Aang catapulted at Zuko first, opening his arms. He was, unfortunately, taller every time Zuko saw him. He towered over Zuko by at least 5 solid inches now. He put his head on Zuko's chin. Zuko grumbled and Sokka laughed from between his sister's arms.

Appa didn't hesitate to stop their hugging with a giant, wet, sky bison lick all over Zuko's Firelord robes. As he jumped back in disgust and tried to wipe it off of him, he looked between all of his friends. They laughed at him, of course, but he could have almost cried from the warmth that surrounded him, having nothing to do with his inner fire at all.

"Sokka I will give you your weight in gold if you come up with a bison saliva remover," Zuko remarked absently as he tried his best to fix his clothes. Toph got up from the dirty ground and grinned at him.

Sokka's face changed to his thinking face, his tongue sticking out for a moment despite the wide grin that spread his features wide. "You know, I did have some plans for that with all of my old stuff. I think I made my first draft of it after I got attacked by Appa in front of Yue at the North Pole. I did the second one shortly after you joined us because I felt bad."

Zuko gave him a soft look at this. He got a little warmer. Absolutely everyone noticed this but said nothing, probably because Toph couldn't see it to call him out.

"Well you're in luck, Zuko," Katara laughed. "We were clearing Appa's saddlebags-reallyold stuff in there, how we hadn't cleaned it in so long really surprised me- and I found this old satchel with some of your papers, Sokka. I'm pretty sure those plans are still in there.

"I did go through them briefly and saw a few things you probably want to keep, as well as some… other things," she saidother thingsin a tone that clearly suggested he might not want the group to know about what she found. Which only made Zuko assume it was embarrassing. He was almost surprised Katara didn't tease him about it so openly, which was usually her go-to. Zuko immediately got intrigued, but instead took the high ground to ask Sokka about it later.

Sokka looked at her confused for a moment before realization dawned on him and he got incredibly red, the blue Fire Nation robes he wore looking stark on his brown skin. "Y-yeah I'll just. Get that. From you."

Katara reached up into the saddlebag, procuring an old green satchel with a green circle on it and gold trim. It was filled to the brim with folded and tightly wound scrolls practically falling out of the sides. At the bottom of the satchel, it was distended, like it was filled somehow more tightly at its base. She got a devilish grin on her face as she handed it to him, putting a hand on her hip. "I'm just surprised you left it. Yourplansare…very important to you."

Sokka sputtered at her. "I must have forgotten about it, okay?! It's not like I ride Appa anymore!"

Toph cackled in his direction. "Oh man, Sweetness. You have to tell me what is in there later. His heart rate is through theroof."

Suki looked Sokka up and down a moment. It was a calculated look. She smirked at him and said, "I knowexactlywhat is in there."

Zuko, looking at Sokka's red and disgruntled form, took pity on him. He looked at between Toph and Suki. "Weren't you guys supposed to take a balloon?"

"We offered it to some… others who wanted to come to the festival. Aang said he'd come to pick us up. We'll tell you later," Suki put a hand on his arm comfortingly and smiled.

He couldn't stop the hesitant smile that spread on his lips in return. "Alright, then."

And with that, Zuko was asking a few of his servants to have his friends' bags brought to their suites in the palace and made sure that dinner would be served for them soon. He let them settle in for a few hours, going back to his own bedroom and changing into slightly less formal robes. Sokka was constantly reminding him that those clothes weresewnwith stiffness and pain in mind and to change as often as he could so he felt normal again. It was little things like that that reminded Zuko that there wasn't anyone else in his life who knew him the way Sokka did.

At dinner, they all ate together, thick bowls of seasoned stew and grilled octo-squid that steamed from their place settings, and Zuko felt like some of his missing pieces were back. Sokka sat next to him, digging heartily into his meat and giving him furtive, happy looks. They shared a quiet understanding- they were all together. Their work paid off.

Work that, apparently, would need to be altered.

"What do you mean the Earth Rumble guys are coming?" Sokka squeaked. He looked equal parts ecstatic and fearful, probably for the additional planning he would have to do to accommodate such a large number of new guests.

"Well, The Boulder said he justcouldn't bareto miss seeing you, specifically, Sokka," Toph said around her food with a grin.

Sokka got pink at this, especially in his ears. "Come on, Toph."

Her smile only widened. "I'm sure you'll be happy to see them."

"Earth Rumble?" Zuko spoke up despite how truly entertaining andcuteSokka's flushed face was. "What's that?'

Both Sokka and Toph got matching faces of shock at this, Sokka's just a tad more angry and indignant than Toph's. "What do youmeanwhat's Earth Rumble?"

Zuko looked at him flatly. Sokka continued.

"It's only the most amazing and intense fights between Earth benders-"

"Oh, so like a bending academy?"

Toph scoffed, loudly. Aang and Katara wore similar looks of disbelieving amusement at the ridiculousness of their friends. "If bending academies were underground betting grounds for grown men instead of little girls."

"Youwere a little girl when you competed-" Sokka pointed out from behind his bowl. It couldn't save him. The earth moved under his seat and he went face-first into the stew, choking. Zuko couldn't help himself from laughing and grabbing his napkin, wiping Sokka's face on impulse.

Sokka carefully took the napkin from him, their hands touching for the briefest of moments.

And okay, Zuko and Sokka had touched hands before. More recently during some very harrowing meetings about removing the homosexuality ban where Sokka took his hand under the table in a sign of allegiance. And yeah there were sometimes when Sokka just reached for him and Zuko let him. It didn'tmeananything.

At least not the way that this brief hand-hold was met by their friends. Aang looked delighted, staring at it like he just found out there was a hopping-llama circus in town. Katara on the other hand looked knowing, half of her face contorting in whatlookedlike sympathy. Suki looked tired, her lips folding inside her mouth and her eyes rolling. Toph was the only one who didn't change much, the grin she had when she threw Sokka only growing impossibly so.

Zuko tried to steer the conversation before they could say or do anything he would regret inviting them to Caldera for. "So it's a secret Earth kingdom fighting ring."

"Yup," Toph said, folding her arms.

"And youcompeted? Asagirl?"Zuko clarified, pointing with the stick hanging out of his octo-squid.

"Watch it, Sparky, or you'll get a face full of stew too, Firelord or not."

"I meant that you did it as a kid," Zuko said testily. "And I'm pretty sure dunking my head like that is an act of treason or war, your pick."

"Treason," Toph agreed, unimpressed. "But yeah. I was the Blind Bandit back then. I won all my matches except one."

Zuko was incredibly interested in this. Mostly because if there had been an underground ring to fight in when he was a kid, he would have been thrilled to let his anger out.

"That one she lost was with Aang anyway," Sokka chimed in. Toph looked like she was about to throw him across the room for a moment and he continued quickly. "She totally would have beat him if she knew he was an airbender."

Everyone nodded at this, even Aang who seemed to have no qualms about Toph's ability to kick his butt.

Toph sighed around a noodle coming to her face. "I do miss having the alter ego, sometimes. It's nice when no one knows you. Simple."

Zuko could relate to this. He said as much, a smile playing on his lips. "There weren't many times I felt like I could be myself outside of the Blue Spirit."

The silence that spread through the room was deafening. He nervously looked to see if any of the kitchen staff were nearby despite him shooing them away earlier to be alone with his friends. They weren't.

Every one of them except Aang had silent, shocked looks on their faces. Zuko wished he had a portrait maker in the room with him to keep it with him for all eternity. Aang just looked excitedly nervous, obviously watching how this bomb affected the group.

Zuko looked at Aang, puzzled. In Zuko's hesitance, all he said was, "Did you not know that?"

"You'rethe Blue Spirit?!" It was Sokka. For some reason, his face was as red as a cherry-tomato and his hands were up.

Zuko took this as Sokka upset that there was, surprisingly, one thing he didn't know about Zuko. He immediately went to reassure him. "Well yes, but I gave up the persona in Ba Sing Se-"

"Butyouwere the Blue Spirit?"

"Yes," Zuko said in a condescending voice. "You can't tell my court, though. There would be a lot of… complications."

It was Katara's reaction that gave Zuko the most pause. At first, she had just been baffled, just trying to process the information that Zuko was the notorious thief and vigilante, the Blue Spirit. Then, inexplicably, Katara started laughing. It was light at first but then grew louder the longer it went on until she was clutching at her side and tears were coming down her eyes. Some of the others laughed as well like it was infectious. Zuko gave a few half-hearted chuckles of his own. Sokka, however, who Katara was staring at through her tears, had somehow gottenmorered and looked to be on the edge of a panic.

If Zuko hadn't been sitting right next to him in their usual spots, he wouldn't have heard it. Hewassitting next to Sokka though, and he heard something that strongly resembled "of ducking doors" muttered under Sokka's breath.

Toph's face moved towards Sokka, an evil glee in it that Zuko couldn't get out of his mind. He got the distinct impression he was missing something.

"Any other secrets you're hiding from us, Sparky?" Toph asked, her face not moving from looking at Sokka.

The Ambassador for the Southern Water Tribe couldn't look anyone in the eyes, not even Zuko.

"That's my main one," Zuko thought carefully. He was in a good mood. He was thankful for it. "Most everyone else knows my history, including the reason behind my banishment, so-"

His mind worked furiously to recall a time when he had told his friends the truth about him. He realized a split second too late the truth.

Katara's eyes peeled from Sokka's still-flushing face over to his in confusion. "Reason behind your banishment?"

Zuko's heart rate picked up a bit when he recognized his mistake.

And yeah, some part of him would never want to tell the story, to anyone. Some part of him loved that they had never learned- that they never used it as a reason to pity him.

But the other part of Zuko was comfortable in his own skin, finally. He was confident in his abilities and his choices. He was a very different person from a thirteen or even sixteen-year-old banished prince.

At Katara's questioning gaze, Zuko raised his brow-bones and explained. "When I was thirteen, I begged my uncle to let me join in a war meeting my father was holding. I wanted to be the perfect prince and future ruler of the nation. I saw this as a good step towards starting those duties. He made me promise not to speak out, to only listen."

Any laughter that his friends had on their faces completely died. In its stead was earnest, raw, and uncovered. Sokka was the only one who did not have this expression. He looked instead like he had been kicked in the side, obviously listening but appearing to regret doing so. Zuko got the feeling that in his many months in the Fire Nation, he probably heard the story. In the back of his mind, Zuko wondered why Sokka had never brought it up.

"During the meeting, one of our generals talked about a plan to attack the Earth Kingdom. He wanted our 41st division to attack."

He looked up at them, unafraid. He spent a long time in his life regretting what he had done, only realizing much later that it had been the right choice.

"But to do so would kill the entire division. Everyone in it was a new recruit with little practical combat experience. In my anger, I spoke out against the general and his plan. I insisted that those people defended their nation and they would be cow-lambs for the slaughter."

He sighed and closed his eyes against the slowly horrified looks on his friends' faces.

"In challenging the general, one of his trusted advisors, I had inadvertently challenged my father, the Firelord. This made him extremely furious. There is only one way to resolve matters of disrespect in that way. We call it an Agni Kai."

Katara flicked him a knowing look quickly. That was exactly what Azula and he had done to end the war.

"Tradition states that two parties meet at sunset in a fire duel. We have a special courtyard for this not far from the palace, which I had decommissioned early into my reign. I thought that I would be challenging the old general and was unafraid. I was the Crown Prince. I had my good breeding, descent bending, and a heart full of determination."

The tension could have cut like a knife, but Zuko continued. His voice was soft in a lull as he told his story.

"When I turned around for my duel, I was faced not with the general, but with my father."

There was a gasp from Aang. The others looked outraged.

"My uncle would explain it to me much later, but because I had spoken out about the plan in the Firelord's war room and did not give him the chance to speak out either for or against this plan, I had disrespectedhim. I would have to face my father in the fire duel."

He gathered himself before continuing. "The problem was this: if I fought against my father and lost, I would probably have been imprisoned for the shame if he decided to show mercy and let me live. If I fought my father and won, I would become the new Firelord but would kill my father in the process. At thirteen."

"So if you won," Suki interrupted angrily. They had let him speak alone until this point, but he wasn't against the clarification. "You kill your dad. But if you lost, your dad would kill or imprison you?"

"Yes."

Strangled gasps and growls resounded around the room. Katara looked murderous. Zuko continued.

"I knew the law and had studied it for ages even before entering that room. I knew there was no way out. I knew I had to fight. But Ilovedmy father. I couldn't fathom hurting him. I knew I had done wrong.

"Instead of fighting, I knelt on the floor and asked for his mercy. I told him that I wouldn't fight him. I told him I was sorry. He got angry that I wouldn't fight back. It made him look weak, that his teenaged son would not fight him."

Here it comes. The moment of truth. They'd never look at his face the same.

"I'm never going to forget his words, probably til the day I die. 'You will learn respect and suffering will be your teacher.'"

Everyone in the room looked like they had been drenched in Katara's water. Even Sokka, who up until this point had been listening regretfully. Zuko was not sad about it anymore. He wasn't angry or lost. He was strong. Proud.

"My father placed his hand on my face and burned me until he was satisfied and I passed out. I will spare you the details since we have just eaten. When I woke up, my uncle informed me that I had been banished for forfeiting the duel. In the Fire Nation, our duels are sacred. Breaking our traditions means that you do not wish tobeFire Nation. My uncle said that I was smart and lucky."

When he looked up at them, his friends, he realized that most of them, even stone-cold Toph, were crying.

Sokka was the first one to grab him from the back of the collar and pull him into a tight and warm hug. He gripped him with both strong arms, his breathing labored against Zuko's chest. Zuko hesitantly wrapped his arms around Sokka, feeling the tight muscle and comfort. He spoke from Sokka's shoulder. "It doesn't bother me as much as it used to. I know I did the right thing- the kind thing. It was the first time someone in my nation had shown any care for other soldiers, especially from a royal. Many of the generals who were in that room would later tell me that they agreed."

Sokka hadn't let him go when the rest of his friends got up from their places and surrounded him in their embrace as well.

It was Katara's voice that would ring in his head later, never letting him forget this moment. "We love you, Zuko. We're so proud of you."

So yeah, maybe after that he needed some time alone. He knew he wouldn't be able to avoid the cuddle pile they were planning in Sokka's bedchambers, with him probably in the middle as their own personal heater. It was an almost funny thought that they were going to Sokka's chambers since the man in question hadn't actually been in there himself for the last month other than to get clothes. He'd been passing out in Zuko's bedroom instead when all of their late-night planning for the festival left him exhausted and wan.

Sometimes Zuko would leave him curled up in the comfy armchair by the fire, making sure to keep it nice and high for him. Other times Zuko would do his best to lift the other man and deposit him in Zuko's own bed, trying as he might not to think too hard about the fact that he looked perfect in it.

He went back to his bedroom, closing the double doors behind him and gazing at the mess in his sitting area. His suite had several rooms that he rarely spent time in as Firelord; a large sitting room with several chairs and a low table, a wide bathroom with a large gilded sink, a deep and cavernous closet that his servants loved picking his outfits for the day, and his bedroom with the (frankly criminally) large canvas bed with red silk sheets. Everything of which was currently laden with Sokka's scrolls and belongings. His sink held Sokka's brushes and oils. His bedroom was scattered with Sokka's discarded clothes. His shelves were filled with Sokka's spare and precious weapons. The table in the sitting room did not have a single millimeter of space, covered in scroll and ink everywhere.

Zuko's purpose for being in his room was to rearrange something in the festival plan to accommodate a few public matches for the Earth Rumble fighters. He would make it a surprise in case he couldn't work it through enough, but he'd be the first to ask Toph if she would reprise her role as Blind Bandit. Perhaps if he asked her nicely, he could join the ring himself. He wasn't sure how his advisors would take his losing a fight to a very powerful, blind earthbending master. Would she automatically get the throne?

He was stopped in his musings when he reached for the paper where the bending demonstration concept charts had been just this morning and found instead the green satchel overflowing with scrolls from Appa's saddle.

Zuko was the first person to account for privacy. He had a serious dislike for his privacy being leaked, let alone the disrespect of others.

But man if there wasn't something that Katara had made clear that Sokka had hidden in there. And he could always play it off as looking for the Bison repellant plans! It wasn't like Appa was going anywhere while they all holed up in the Fire Nation palace. He would very much like to see if Sokka was on to something there.

So he dug through the scrolls for a bit, keeping his good eye and ear on the door to make sure he could hear any movement.

At the top of the stacks were mostly war plans. There was a map of Azulon's gate, of the path to the Fire Nation palace littered with Sokka's messy scrawl. There were a few stacks of actual notes that looked more like musings from Sokka to himself- things like "Armor, Appa?" and "Earthbenders on the ground, rock barrage" so Zuko knew this was most likely the plans for Sokka's defeat on the Day of Black Sun. He had heard very little about it since the war ended, but it was all Sokka could talk about before they defeated the Firelord. Zuko sometimes wondered who got overwhelmed with work more- Sokka or himself? Clearly, this was a consistent pattern for Sokka. Folded around neatly was the flier from the show they saw on Ember Island. He grimaced at the memory.

He sorted through a few more scrolls on top, actually finding the Bison saliva repellant plans (which were little more than doodles for some sort of roundish brush) before digging deeper into the bag, retrieving a folded piece of parchment.

Which, upon Zuko's horrified realization, was a really terrible drawing of Sokka with a man who was holding his face who… was that Zuko's Blue Spirit mask? And leaning forward to (he assumed the little bow-like thing were lips) kiss him.

Zuko went numb all over. It was a picture of Sokka kissing the Blue Spirit. More like the Blue Spirit kissinghim. He's seen Sokka's abilities with a brush. This was his doing.

His eyes were as wide as dinner plates as he reached into the bag and brought out a very thick stack of folded-up parchment that was tied with a piece of fraying twine. Were these more pictures?

When he carefully withdrew the first one, he almost wished ithadbeen. Instead, it was more of Sokka's writing in slanted lines. Zuko couldn't stop himself from reading.

"Super Awesome Blue Heroes

Chapter 1

I was a ruthless, amazing hero. I walked the streets of Ba Sing Se like I owned them. The citizens waved and smiled at me as I past them. I was there hero. But I was not there only one.

There was another that I knew of, a strong daring hero who I wished to meet. One night on patrol, I finally got the chance.

"You are the Blue Spirit." i said to him.

"I am" he replied in a husky voice. "You must be the great amazing hero Sokka."

"You have heard of me?" I asked him surprized.

"Of course." He drew closer, his firm, black gloved hands landing on my waste. "I have heard your amazing and very funny."

I drew closer to him. He lifted the mask off of his face. He closed the distance between us and sealed our lips together. He was incredibly muscular and handsome.

His hands moved from my waste to my butt, cupping firmly. "Let us be amazing together. Come with me."

He took my hand led me on to an empty cart. I didnt care if it was someones. We would only need it for a few minutes.

He laid me back on it and we kissed hungrily. I put my legs on either side of him while he leaned forward on top of me."

Zuko had to literally stop himself from reading any further because he was choking on his spit, clutching the sheets of parchment with white knuckles.

It was obviously unedited. And it was also obviously porn. Abouthim.

As he lowered the paper to count how many chapters there were- and spirits it looked like a lot of them with the stack that big- he realized his door was open.

Standing in the doorway with his hand on the door, probably to tell him to come to bed with him, was Sokka. Who looked just as horrified at red as he had when Katara had mentioned the scrolls earlier. And how red he looked when he realized Zuko was the Blue Spirit.

This wasdefinitelywhat she was talking about.

Zuko literally couldn't speak. He felt his face hot and knew he was probably blushing just as bad. Nothing came out of his mouth. He realized that he had left the drawing open on the table as well, further adding to the embarrassment. He figured Sokka knew exactly what he was reading since the satchel was open haphazardly on the table still.

"I-" Sokka sputtered, obviouslytryingto saysomething. "You-I-it's-I didn't know-I would-"

Sokka's brain had clearly stopped working, which Zuko was fine with since he didn't think his was working either. He realized he was still clutching the parchment and dropped it like it had burned him (he wished it had).

Eventually, Sokka got over enough of his embarrassment to mask it with anger. "That was private!"

"It was- on," Zuko struggled out through his lungs. Comeonwords, get out! "We're inmybedroom!"

Sokka sputtered, rushing forward and shoving the papers into the satchel so hard Zuko was sure he heard a few tears in it. "Notthe point- totally private-no one's eyes- Katara, nowyou-"

He looked up at Zuko dead in the eyes then, only centimeters away from him where he was bent down, and whatever skin he had that had started getting only pink went back to being bright red. His eyes went to be balcony behind Zuko like he was going to jump for it. Zuko wanted to beat him to it.

"This isvery veryold, you heard Katara," he spoke very quickly, standing backward, the satchel clutched desperately in his hands. "Before I knew you, old!"

Because Zuko absolutely loved digging his own grave, his mouth said, "I wasn't the Blue Spirit until after I met Aang at the South Pole."

Sokka blanched, eyes wide and blinking. "We didn't-I didn't know you were Zuko- that Zuko is you- that the Blue Spirit is-"

Zuko literally couldn't stop the laugh that started escaping him in maniacal fits. After a terrified moment, Sokka relaxed a little and chuckled despite his embarrassment.

"It's- it's okay," Zuko said once he'd calmed down somewhat. He didn't feel the flush rise back and hoped that was a good sign. Sokka was still red, though. "Seriously it's fine."

Sokka smacked a hand on his forehead. "I really am such an idiot."

"I just can't believe you had a crush onthe Blue Spirit," Zuko said, some crazy (truly) part of him wanting togiggle. Because look where they were now?

Sokka looked almost hurt. "That's the part that you can't believe?"

"Well yeah because that's ridiculous."

"Is it?" Sokka asked. He was blinking quickly at Zuko, no longer red in the face. He now had the satchel over his shoulder like he would run with it any moment, hand gripping tightly to its long strap. "Why is that ridiculous?"

"Because- because-" Zuko struggled for a minute to put it into words. Because Sokka was the hero, not him. Even as the Blue Spirit he had done what was in his best interests. Because Sokka really was amazing and funny and smart and out of anyone he could have wanted,Zukowould be the laughable choice. "Because the Blue Spirit is me! That's ridiculous."

Sokka almost looked hurt. This was spinning uncontrollably the wrong way. He wanted to ease the tension- tell Sokka it didn't matter, that everything was fine between them, even if he would probably never get the physical or mental images out of his mind so long as he lived. "T-the Blue Spirit was important to me. I saw the good he was doing- you were doing."

He was explaining himself to Zuko, apparently trying to make him see. Zuko wanted to stop him but he found he couldn't. He needed to see where he was going with this.

"A-and yeah it was just something I was using to get my frustrations out, but it doesn't make itridiculousto be in love with you-"

Zuko's next words stuck in his throat like hot rice. "You were in love with me?"

Sokka closed his eyes, still clutching tightly to his green satchel, looking pained in the middle of Zuko's sitting room.

"I'minlove with you."

Zuko's mouth opened but just like earlier and no words came out but this time it was for a very different reason.

"I've been in love with you for years, Zuko." He gestured to the scrolls sticking out of the satchel. "Clearly I've been in love with you much longer than I realized."

"You're in love with me," Zuko parroted weakly.

This was a dream. It had to be, right? They'd spent so long dancing around each other that Zuko had gotcomfortablewith it. Neither of them saying it. He wasn't sure Sokka even felt that way about him- he was sure he had been giving enough signals for it to have been obvious that he was interested, but every time it was almost like Sokka shied away from him.

Sokka still looked pained, his face scrunched up, and eventually, he dropped it when he realized Zuko wasn't going to yell at him or tell him to leave. Which Zuko would never have done.

"Look, I get it that you have your Firelord duties. I'm thelastperson to tell you they aren't stressful and overwhelming. I don't want this," he gestured to himself and the scrolls. "To mess up what we have. I never have. That's why I… waited so long to tell you. I know that you're busy and I'm not going to force you-to- to-"

There he was at a loss for words again.

Spirits, Zuko really was in love with him too.

"I'm in love with you, too," Zuko said, standing so they were level. He realized he had moved to stand in front of Sokka, the blue of his eyes shining brightly.

There was a deep unadulterated hope in his eyes, looking between Zuko's eyes and face to make sure he wasn't kidding. He wasn't. "I think some part of me has always…"

Always been in love with the boy with the plans. Always been in love with the one guy who never failed to make him laugh. Always been in love with Sokka.

And Sokka put his arms around Zuko's shoulders, closed his eyes, and kissed him.

The press of his lips was soft and slightly cool. They were plump and wet where he had been worrying it before. Something singed in Zuko's veins at the pressure and the altogetherrightnessthat he felt. Sokka slid perfectly against him, their noses on either side, one hand pulling into Zuko's black hair and the other cupping the back of his neck and part of his jaw. Zuko reciprocated by pulling Sokka by one hip, the other going to rest at the base of his neck where his undercut was, playing with the velvety pieces there. Zuko got lost in the passion of the kiss- feeling Sokka's breath as he puffed out through his nose, feeling breathless himself. They broke apart once, twice, only to go right back again.

The next time they did that, Zuko tasted salt. He opened his eyes in shock to find Sokka crying against him. He pulled away with a lightsmackas their lips broke apart. They didn't move either of their hands though.

Sokka shuddered out his breath, a smile coming on his lips immediately. "I can't believe this is my life. This is real."

"It's real," Zuko said, kissing each of his tear-stained cheeks. "It's real."

They stayed like that for what could have been a few moments or a few hours. Sokka's chest was heaving as he struggled to take in breaths. Zuko was no better.

When they finally calmed down, Zuko couldn't help himself. "Better or worse?"

Sokka gazed into his eyes, irises churning like a summer sea. "Better or worse..?"

"Better or Worse than fiction?" Zuko clarified.

Sokka laughed a rough, low thing. "Much much better than fiction."

As he grabbed the giant silk comforter from his bedspread and Sokka grabbed his pillows, Zuko thought about how much unsaid went between him and his friends. He thought about how much love was shared in the spaces and things they didn't say and he thought about the love in what they did.

He buried himself in the middle of the pile, once more, feeling as Toph's cheek found his thigh and Sokka's arm went around his chest and Katara pillowed herself between Aang and Zuko's arms and he felt, deep down, what it meant to really call someone a Friend.

And as he looked at Sokka, his eyelids getting heavy with sleep, his hair out of its usual tight wolf tail, his smile wide as he thought about the festival to come, Zuko knew what it meant to call someone a loved one.

Mmmmmmmmmmmm... Mm mm m... Mmmmmmm... Mmmmmmm... Mm

Toph was the first one to notice water rising a few layers deep underground. It froze almost as quickly as it had come up, but she found her footing on a collection of rocks without more than a wobble and was quick to retaliate the attack with a hunk of soil that rocketed Katara's way.

Aang pushed himself up in the air but was very nearly caught in the crossfire. He had been distracted enough to be surprised by the thick sheet of ice under his bare feet, slithering and flailing for several seconds, the Avatar nearly ended up face-first on the ungiving surface. He caught himself on sore palms before moving upward like a leaf in the wind.

Out of the four of them, Zuko seemed the most off-guard. By the time he got back on his feet, Toph had already despaired of the ice around them, pulling blocks of earth from the ground to throw at her opponents at the first - fair - chance. But Aang was out of her sight now and Katara launched a counterattack, whereas Zuko went down again unprompted. It's been less than a minute since Katara's offensive sent everyone tumbling, but their fight was a fast one, so it wasn't very surprising that Sokka - who kept a safe distance - was the first to notice. He took an instinctive step closer as Zuko groaned and fumbled for leverage to pull himself up again, trying to rejoin the ongoing training match. It wasn't like him to flounder like this - being a skilled swordsman as well as a firebender, meant he was quicker on his feet than his opponents anticipated. Usually. A few feet from him, Toph shielded herself from Katara's incursion and, in a fluid motion, turned towards Aang, redirecting the water his way with a floating aqua duct. He managed to evade it just in time, twirling around. He fumbled for a second and his brows narrowed. Without another glance at the girls, Aang hastily thrust his palms out. A gush of air forced the Toph and Katara backwards.

"Time out!" The sudden shout froze his opponents mid-action. Even Sokka felt his muscles tense. It was still novel to hear him command attention in such a serious manner. Everyone's eyes were on Aang, including those of Appa and Momo who were lounging in their camp not far from today's training ground.

Katara was the first move. She dropped a gallon of water and straightened out her back. Concern laced her voice: "What's wrong, Aang?"

Sokka's eyes wandered the woods, his ears perked, instinctively he looked for any sign of an intruder. Nothing. His gaze crossed the cluttered battlefield as his brain played catch up trying to figure out what exactly was amiss. (It hadn't been easy to follow a fight with four skilled benders who all went up against each other simultaneously.) But there. His breath hitched in his throat. Zuko still crouched on the ground, cupping his nose, staring at Aang too. Probably wondering the same things Sokka was, judging by the deep pull of eyebrows and shadow over his eyes. The former prince shifted his weight and a muffled grunt of annoyance escaped through the hand covering part of his face. That's when Sokka realised Aang was looking at him too.

"Dude, what happened?" Sokka yelled, jogging up to the firebender. Zuko wasn't one to stay down for long in his experience - if he went down at all. Even Toph seemed confused and she should've been able to keep track of their messy battlefield with ease, right? Whatever sent Zuko to the ground, she must've felt it. Or maybe Toph thought it'd be unfair to keep up with her opponents in detail. Either way, it looked like none of them had witnessed the assault that left Zuko still grounded and rubbing his face with a pained expression.

"I slipped", he groaned with an eye-roll. "'s fine."

"Yeah, we all slipped", Toph quipped, even though she had been the only one to evade Katara's attack. "And then we got up again."

"Yeah", Katara took a step forward, her voice was careful and uncertain, showcasing the growing guilt she no doubt felt. Sokka wanted to reassure her but Aang was faster. He put a hand on Katara's shoulder.

"Why aren't you getting up? Are you hurt?" Instinctively, Katara pulled moisture from the vial on her belt. Sokka gulped. Sure, the fight had looked intense - which is why he stayed far, far away - but no one was supposed to get seriously injured. They had all been alert to the possibility, what with how messy it was to fight four against four, that was part of the exercise. It should've been fine.

"No." It took a moment for the prince to speak up again. He was rubbing life back into his pale cheeks, having resigned himself to staying seated on the ground for now, head lowered on his knees. "I just- I hit my head. I think. It's fine."

"That was your head?" Toph almost squealed. She had definitely felt the impact but had been unable to decipher it in the rush. "Man, I thought maybe Sokka tossed us a melon as a distraction or something. I was like so confused how he'd managed to pick up something that heavy. I just didn't have time to check with Kataras attack and all."

"Hey-", Sokka protested, pulling at his short sleeves. He had gained some muscle in the last few weeks thank you very much. Mainly because he's been training with his sword and boomerang so much, but trying out some endurance exercises too. He was about to say more when his eyes fell back on a groaning Zuko, who just pulled his hands away from his face for the first time since his fall. Sokka screeched. "You're bleeding!"

Zuko looked down at his hands, a second or two passed before realisation set in, his face pale again. Paler than usual that is. Sokka thought he saw the guy falter for a second but when he spoke up, Zukos's voice was as steady as ever: "It's fine."

Katara, now right by his side, reached out slowly. Knowing eyes fixed on the older boy she hesitated. Just by looking, Katara could tell what was wrong. "It looks like your nose is broken, Zuko."

Ouch, that oughta hurt, it sure looks pretty bad. Sokka thought. He'd only ever broken his arm before, he couldn't imagine having something like that in his face of all places.

Before Katara could even hover her small hands above his face, Zuko backed away, dodging her touch expertly. The move looked similar to his evasion tactics while sword fighting, just that he was seated. And that he was trying to get away from the healing touch of a waterbender. Katara looked a little irritated but remained close with increasing conviction. This was her fault, sort of, so she was going to fix it.

A steady flow of thick red dripped from Zuko's nostrils and something about the angle of his nose bridge didn't look quite right. Was it turning blue already? Still, Zuko seemed mainly unfazed. "Don't worry about it."

"It's not that difficult. I can fix it for you. Here, just let me..." Katara trailed off and twisted her wrist to cover both her hands in a thin film of cool water. She had a look of concentrated determination set on her face like she wasn't bothered by the sight of all that blood at all. She probably wasn't, not anymore. Not after everything they had seen since the Avatar hatched out of an iceberg right in front of them. Back then she wouldn't have known what the hell to do about a broken nose, but now it seemed like one of the easier ailments to cure.

"It's fine." Zuko insisted.

"It's no bother at all, I don't-" Katara smiled sweetly and followed his movement when Zuko turned his face away from her.

"It's. Fine." Zuko repeated more firmly, enunciating clearly. His expression shifted from total indifference to blooming irritation when he skidded backwards, putting distance between himself and the watertribe girl, and Katara followed without missing a beat. The blood from his nose dripped from his chin and stained Zukos Jinbaori.

"Don't worry, Zuko, it's just a little pressure and then you'll be good. I can stop the bleeding, too, and give you something to coo-"

"Are you deaf? I said it's fine!" Zuko spat the words like acid and glared a thousand daggers at Katara. His usual facade of nonchalance crumbled fast. Zuko was tense all over and looked uncomfortable as hell the way he leaned as far away from Katara as possible, without laying flat on the ground.

"I don't want or need your help. Bother someone else, will you", he hissed and the sight made Sokka think of a wounded animal. The way his teeth were exposed and his muscles visibly shook from exertion - Zuko looked about ready to attack and bolt. Just like back then, before he started growing out his hair and joined the gaang. Angry and erratic. It made him wonder what kind of life the former prince had lived back then - if his core was something more peaceful or along or if this was the real Zuko. No, the latter didn't make sense anymore.

"Can you just leave me the fuck alone?"

Katara finally took a step back: "Fine." She echoed back his edge with noticeable irritation - all she'd done was try to help someone she wasn't particularly close with.

"It's your nose that's gonna end up all crocked, see if I care. Just try not to bleed all over our stuff!"

She turned around on her heels with a loud huff ready to storm off. Katara's more hot-headed side didn't come out often but with Sozin's Comet approaching they were all a bit high-strung, she couldn't be faulted. And even though the air between her and Zuko had mostly cleared after their little (nearly murderous) field trip, it was reasonably hard to leave all that build-up resentment behind in no more than two days.

Aang and Toph both gazed at Zuko with a certain sense of unease.

"Well, that turned out awesome", Toph whistled, "Great going Sokka. Hope your plans for the comet are better than this one!"

"What? How is this my fault?" Sokka flailed wildly.

Toph snorted and crossed her arms, "It was your idea, idiot."

Sokka gasped for air like an elephant koi on dry land, waving his arms around: "I literally said you guys should work out a better training plan because you can't all train at once. How is that suggesting you all train at once? Huh? How? I repeatedly stated that this was going to end badly. REPEATEDLY."

"Whatever," the earthbender kicked away a sizeable rock and nodded in Zuko's general direction. "Sorry, I got you in the face. I'm sure you're still very pretty."

Sokka rolled his eyes, even though Toph was right regardless of whether or not she knew what Zuko looked like. Nothing could disfigure a face like that - most certainly not a nip in the nose. Even though it did look like a horror show right now. Sokka was kind of nervous about being unable to see the full extent of the damage. There was just so much blood smeared across half of the older teen's face. Zuko's futile attempt to wipe it away had only made it look much, much worse.

"It's not your fault," the teen muttered, eyes fixed on nothing in particular. He looked a little calmer now that Katara had left, but Sokka could still tell that he was tense as hell. It wasn't natural how little Zuko's body moved even when he let out a heavy breath.

"Sure. Still." Toph shrugged. "Although... I guess that kinda makes us even now, right? A foot for a face?"

The teasing merriment in her voice managed to briefly soften Zuko's expression. It wasn't a secret that he still felt bad for burning her feet when he first tried to join Team Avatar. Toph's total lack of a grudge towards him was unprecedented for the prince, or so he had mentioned off-handedly.

Aang cleared his throat. "Are you sure you're okay?" He took a tentative step forward: "It really doesn't look so good, Zuko. There's a lot of blood, maybe if Katara-"

The scowl was back and tighter than before. Zuko sat up straight fast enough to sway for a second and wiped at his nose - breath hitching in the back of his throat. He tried to play it off but the others noticed.

"No." Zuko cut him off sharply. "I'm fine. I don't need anyone poking around on my face, got it? I'm fine."

Aang paused. The more he repeated those worse, the less believable they sounded. But Zuko didn't leave much room for discussion when he finally pushed himself off the ground and stood - in the loosest sense of the word. For a moment there he wavered enough for both Aang and Sokka to rush to his side. Ready to catch the older boy. But Zuko remained upright at last. Barely. But he did. And he looked mostly unfazed doing so - which was almost more impressive.

"I'm fine", he said with finality and staggered away carefully. One step in front of the other. Sokka saw him glance down without tilting his head like he didn't want the others to notice how he had to look at the ground while walking, just so he didn't fall. "I'm going to clean up."

Aang let out a long sigh as Zuko vanished between the trees, heading towards the river. They had picked a good spot for this week's hideout. The Airtemple wasn't too far and neither were lush forests and clean water sources. Sokka's gaze stayed fixed on the spot where Zuko's form started to blend in with green leaves and bushes. He tried to wrap his head around the other boy's strange behaviour. The harsh way in which he had brushed off Katara's attempts to help and ran from his friends. It was almost like none of their bonding had happened. Zuko was defensive and rude. A jarring contrast to the awkward turtle duck trying a little too hard to redeem himself. Especially since Katara and Zuko had been getting along just fine recently, and Zuko gradually warmed up (ha!) to the group as he became part of it. The sudden distance between them pulled at a set of heartstrings Sokka hadn't previously associated with the guy.

Like a wounded cat owl , Sokka thought again.

"Sokka?" Aang spoke up carefully, glancing between the woods and the teenager. "I don't think Zuko's as fine as he says." Sokka could just about refrain from rolling his eyes all the way to the back of his head. Yeah, duh. If Aang noticed his face twitching he didn't say anything. Instead, he shot the older boy his very best impression of a responsible Avatar about to deliver some serious balance. "Would you mind going after him? I don't think he'd let me or Toph help, you know? But you two seem to get along pretty well. I don't think he's gotten as close to anyone else. Maybe you can change his mind about accepting help."

Sokka opened his mouth to protest because obviously, Aang spent a lot more time with Zuko, quarrelling and roasting marshmallows or whatever. Although, they probably didn't talk much. Sokka and Zuko talked. Sometimes. Well, mostly it was just Sokka. But Zuko seemed relaxed enough when he was bombarded with thoughts and unrequested details of their past journey. Something about finishing a good training session made Sokka extra talkative.

Despite their rocky start something akin to trust and quiet understanding grew between. Boiling Rock was part of the reason why. Having to rely on each other during a life-or-death situation is a real trust builder. Slowly, they were expanding on that. The other guy was good company and Sokka relished in having someone his age around.

Sokka nodded a quick yes, looking thoughtfully at the forest. Thinking about Zuko did something unexpected to his guts. "Huh. I guess you're right. Okay. Well, I'm going to go check on him then."

"Thank you", Aang smiled widely. "I'm glad you two hit it off."

Somewhere in the back, Toph let out a snarky laugh followed by a quiet curse that coincided with Aang swatting away a spider wasp. (That's what he was doing right? Waving his hand around? Even though Sokka hadn't seen any insects around. If Toph got a face full of leaves that was no one's fault.)

Determination bloomed within him. Zuko wasn't fine and Sokka was his only hope. At least in regards to his - objectively - pretty face. Maybe he could talk him into accepting help after all. Even if Zuko didn't fully trust Katara yet, Sokka would vouch for her.

"Hey, can you maybe talk to Katara while I'm gone?"

"Me?" Aang stuttered: "Uh, yeah, sure! I'm happy to. Do you think she's upset Zuko snapped at her? She was just trying to help. But he's probably not used to teammates like that."

Sokka shrugged, but Aang didn't wait for a reply as he ran off towards their camp, yelling the older girl's name. Oh boy, he had it bad. Sokka shook his head and made his way into the forest.

Not even fifteen minutes passed by the time Sokka caught up to Zuko. For some reason he had expected him to go further down the river, maybe so far that they wouldn't find him for days. Or ever. Even though everything Sokka knew about Zuko at this point told him that the guy wouldn't just bail on them, not over a broken nose and an overly helpful waterbender at least.

Sokka sighed when he saw the Fire Nation prince sitting hunched over by the river. Not looking any better - worse, actually. Sokka could've sworn there was some colour left on his face before he left. Even his scar appeared paler than before. The picture of blood running down Zuko's chin and shirt was already burned into the back of his eyes, he'd hate to see him faint too.

Slowly, but with loud and heavy steps Sokka closed in. Bracing himself to get his head bitten off by the angry tigermonkey Zuko was impersonating. With only a few steps left between them, his presence still went unnoticed, and Sokka caught on to why the former prince looked worse for wear. Zuko was pressing - weakly - with the heel of his left hand against the bridge of his nose. Wincing at the pain and unable to apply the pressure it would take to straighten out his nose. (Was that even possible? Sokka wondered.)

Sokka almost gagged as he watched Zuko take a deep breath and grunt at another attempt - he downright whined when he couldn't bring himself to go through with it and Sokka's heartstrings twisted painfully. It was an absolute horrorshow. You'd have thought Zuko would've at least made use of the spring water to clean his face before he went to town on his nose.

As another attempt was unsuccessful, it was the nearby fish who had to bear the brunt of his frustration. Literally, as Zuko grunted and a burst of fire came from his fists, effectively frying a fish or four in the river to his feet.

Considerably more cautious now, Sokka coughed loudly and awkwardly. "Hey there, pal. Man. Buddy. Zuko. How's it hanging, how's it going? Everything alright?"

Zuko (hadn't he heard Sokka's before?) turned around with a start. Staring wide-eyed, for just a moment before his face tightened back up, hiding golden eyes in near-black shadows of hair. He twisted his body away from the other boy and crossed his arms in a way that hid the bloodstains on his hands. "What is it, Sokka?"

Before Sokka could come up with an answer that wouldn't be met with immediate defiance, he added: "I'm not going to see Katara about this."

Well, there went the honest and direct route. Sokka knew he couldn't make Zuko do anything he wasn't comfortable with but he didn't understand what the big issue was and he really would love for someone - anyone - to wipe the blood off Zuko. Fixing the very likely pain in his nose would be a bonus; it should probably be Sokka's top priority as a friend, but the sight in front of him was just so bad.

"Sure. That's cool. All your decision, buddy. Honestly", Sokka sat down a few feet away from him and briefly considered toeing off his shoes to dip his feet in the cool water below. But first things first. "I'm not here to convince you, I swear. Besides, I wouldn't let Katara anywhere near my face either. So I get you. Who knows what she'd do to this work of art? She's a good healer, but eh... she's also still my little sister. You know how it is. They can be super mischievous."

He glanced at the other boy and was met with a frown. Which part was it that irritated Zuko? Sokka's tongue had slipped and the words came out without much thought, but Azula and Katara were nothing alike. She'd probably disfigure a guy for real.

"But that's just me, I'm sure Katara would be perfectly nice to you."

If Zuko accepted Katara's help, he'd already be up and steady on his feet again. Add a bit of flaming stew and Zuko would be right as rain in no time. Even if the hit to his head had loosened a screw or two. Katara could probably fix that too. But Zuko had decided to run off instead. Which was a completely normal reaction to a little nosebleed, of course. Not really, Sokka thought.

"Zuko?" Sokka cleared his throat and pulled back his shoulders when he didn't get a reply. There had to be something he could say or do. There had to be. "You don't have to tell me, but, why won't you let Katara help?" His voice was quiet this time and Zuko's expression softened a little at the lack of force behind the question.

"Isn't it obvious?"

Sokka blinked, trying to materialize the camelephant in the room that he'd missed so far. "It is?"

"You really can't tell?" Zuko looked at him with surprise and Sokka took the moment to study his face. The blood was distracting but the flow had eased. Some of it had dried by now, so it didn't look as gorey anymore. His nose looked, well, broken and a bit blue. But then there were Zuko's piercingly golden eyes - bright as the sun on any other day, right now they looked like a desert storm. The life reflected in them tended to distract Sokka.

Zuko's soft (by the looks of them anyway) lips were pressed into a thin line and his eyebrow narrowed under the surveillance. Some of his face was obscured by the jet-black hair that had grown out messily. And of course, there was the scar too. Sokka had no idea how Zuko got it, but he could tell it was caused by fire, so he assumed it must have been a training accident. Maybe it happened when he first started to firebend and couldn't quite control his strength yet? Sokka could imagine a small and overeager Zuko training and playing and tripping into what always seemed to come so naturally for him.

Overall, as he let his eyes wander across Zuko's face - his well-trained body, too, for just a second - Sokka noticed how attractive he was. It's insane. Of course, he's noticed it before, countless times. The stark contrast of strong features and soft edges defined Zuko's character as much as his looks. Sokka had a lot of unspoken admiration that he didn't care to explore and rarely even indulged in, but he could easily admit the obvious.

"Are you worried about your good looks? I told you, Katara would probably not do you dirty like that. She's not actually that vindictive."

"Hah. Funny."

"I try", Sokka shrugged with half a smile, but Zuko didn't reciprocate. "Hold on, which part?"

Zuko's piercing sandstorm eyes were set on Sokka's face with a sudden intensity like he was looking for something. It made him hold his breath as he tried not to squirm. Zuko did that sometimes, staring at him like he didn't understand the very matter that made up Sokkas existence - which was fair, because Sokka talked a lot of shit, especially after training when he was tired and hyper at the same time. It made his stomach twist to be looked at with so much vigilance.

A few silent beats passed before Zuko looked away, choosing to stare holes into the river instead and Sokka relaxed a little. Whatever the other teen had been looking for he must not have found.

"You think I'm good-looking?" Zuko asked eventually, words slow and cautious.

"Well, yeah? You've got that whole heartthrob thing going on", Sokka shrugged, vaguely aware that he ought to be walking into a trap right now. Zuko didn't need to know just how attractive Sokka thought he was. But then again, it was so obvious that denying anything would make him look dumb.

Zuko was quiet again.

"I don't know about that", he said eventually and Sokka wished he'd turn towards him so he could properly decipher the look on his face. His voice was tighter than before. "But no. I'm not worried about looks, okay? I know better than to care about something like that."

"Okay?" Doubtful, but sure, Sokka was willing to let the subject go in light of more important matters, like why Zuko was trying to fix his goddamn nose by himself like a dumbass. "So? What is it then?"

More quiet. Which was to be expected. Sokka was trained in patience by now, at least for the time being. He was grateful to even be allowed around a Zuko who seemed miles more vulnerable than usual, therefore he best not fuck this up. Zuko cleared his throat, and finally, some blood rushed back to his cheeks. He gestured weakly towards the left half of his face.

"I just don't like anyone touching my face. Okay?"

Oh. Oddly enough that made a lot more sense than the vanity angle Sokka had tried to work. So much so, that he was downright embarrassed of not having thought of this first. Although Sokka still didn't fully understand. So, without thinking, he blurted out: "Why not?"

"Wh-", Zuko looked at him, but the disbelief on his face made Sokka avert his gaze. He let out a sheepish laugh and tugged at his ponytail.

" Why ? There's a scar across half of my face and you're asking why I don't like people touching my face?"

Sokka pursed his lips and looked up. "Is it like, really sensitive? Does it hurt when you touch it?"

Zuko shook his head. "That's not it."

"Are you", and Sokka couldn't believe he was about to say these words, because he didn't believe them one ounce: "Embarrassed?"

Zuko huffed a laugh and it almost sounded amused. He shook his head and, in a likely subconscious gesture, moved careful fingertips across the lower edge of his scar. His and Sokka's eyes met again. "I told you, I'm not that vain."

You could be , Sokka thought. It would be warranted.

For maybe the first time ever he really, really, truly looked at the fleshy pink scar tissue that stood out unevenly against Zuko's skin. Some of it was considerably darker than the majority, either because the heat that had damaged the skin there had been hotter than elsewhere, or because it was naturally thinner. Like his eye, which was partly obstructed and looked almost swollen from the thickness of the scar tissue. Whatever accident had led to this kind of lasting mark would've been incredibly painful and most definitely required a lot of medical attention. Like a lot, a lot. Sokka's face fell in silent realisation. That was it, wasn't it? It wasn't Katara, and it wasn't vanity or embarrassment that had made Zuko back away from getting help.

"Figured it out?" The right corner of Zuko's lips was pulled upwards by half a smile. One that didn't reach his eyes and made the dried blood move stiffly along. "Guess your head is good for more than just decoration, hm?"

Sokka didn't say anything. He didn't want to prod, he still wanted to help. But not at the expense of making Zuko feel even worse.

"After the Agni Kai..." Zuko turned away, and Sokka could feel the distance he was creating between them as he steadied his voice and pulled back his shoulders. "The burn had looked a hell of a lot worse then. When it was still fresh. So it needed a lot of attention that I didn't care for. I didn't trust the palace healers and they didn't like me much. I had lost all honour when I refused to fight my father and none of us wanted to be there. So it wasn't fun, to say the least." He took a steadying breath and Sokka realized he was holding his own. "The honour thing... That's just what I thought back then. But everyone in the palace agreed. Obviously. Everyone but Uncle. So they weren't gentle. Not that I thought I deserved special treatment, but it was- it was a difficult time for me. So, no offence to your sister, but I don't think she'd manage to snap my nose back unscathed. I can't guarantee how I'd react if she tried. And I've already hurt enough people. I don't want to add her to that list."

With every word, more questions had bubbled up inside Sokka. The scar didn't look new, but Zuko made it sound like it's hardly been any time since he got it. Like the memory was still fresh and raw inside him. One thing Sokka understood was that the healers had been rough with the teen and his - honestly traumatic-looking - wound.

Still, he couldn't piece together how Ozai or Zuko's honour fit into the picture either. (Did he get burnt while looking for the Avatar? But how- What was that about a fight?)

Sokka's head was smoking with thoughts and theories. Processing what Zuko had said. He wasn't stupid, but there was a lot of information missing. If he asked the right questions though, Sokka was sure he'd be able to make sense of it, although part of him didn't want to know any more.

"Agni Kai? You mean, like the dance?"

"The-", Zuko looked at him and blinked slowly. The confusion evident on his face replaced some of the tension between his brows, but only for a few seconds. "It's not a dance. What- why would you think that?"

"Oh", Sokka gulped and glanced away, laughing quietly as he thought about the fire nation tales Gran Gran's friend Hokuri had told them. With how isolated their tribe had been during the war it wasn't much of a surprise that not all the facts were just that. According to Hokuri, whose grandfather had lived in the fire nation for a while, there was a special couples dance involving fire. In her version, the Agni Kai was a method of clearing a lover's dispute between firebenders and reigniting their flame of passion. Come to think of it, the story didn't make much sense after all. "Just guessing. So, uh, what is it then?"

"It's", Zuko brushed a hand through his messy locks and hesitated. His eyes drifted back to the water. "It's a traditional firebender duel."

"Okay?" Sokka waited a few seconds to see if Zuko was going to explain further, but the other boy stayed silent. It gave him time to slowly slide the puzzle pieces together. A fight had caused Zuko's scar. He had refused to fight his father. He lost his honour and the healers were unkind. Suddenly understanding dawned on Sokka's face. "Oh."

"An Agni Kai is meant to resolve the conflict between two firebenders and it always ends with a nasty burn, at best. It's all about honour. I never even dreamed I'd have to fight one, so when my father-" Zuko stopped suddenly, biting his tongue like he only just realized where he was going.

Sokka was caught between the fuzzy feeling of knowing Zuko somehow felt comfortable enough to talk to him and the nausea of understanding what exactly had happened to Zuko's face. It couldn't have been an accident if he had refused to seriously fight against his own father. Firelord Ozai was even more of a sick fuck than Sokka had expected.

"How old were you?" When your father melted off a third of your face, Sokka thought with clenched fists. He willed himself to stay calm, but it was nearly impossible. No wonder Zuko had been running after Aang like a headless chicken all that time, it was massively surprising that he turned out as well as he did. With that kind of paternity, he could've been an absolute maniac. Could still be an absolute maniac.

"Thirteen."

"Th-", Sokka almost yelled, and only stopped when blue met gold and he noticed a lack of the expected turmoil on Zuko's face. Like he wasn't bothered by the past at all. Worse, even, Zuko let out a breathy laugh.

"What? Like it would have made a difference if I had been any other age?" Zuko shook his head with a sigh when Sokka was about to protest. "It's been a long time for me. Don't worry, I know that it's messed up to challenge your thirteen-year-old kid to a fight when you're the most powerful firebender in the world. I'm not that brainwashed." There was an unspoken 'anymore' on his tongue that was so obvious that Sokka could hear it loud and clear in the wind rushing past.

Somehow Zuko had managed to become a loyal, kind and seriously accommodating person with an ever-growing sense of justice. And not just despite his faults, but despite the entire shitty world around him. The thought made Sokka's heart flutter with admiration. But he couldn't just shake off the horrors of what he'd just learned. And there was still the matter of blood smeared on Zuko's chin and under his crooked nose. All in all, it was a bit much. Sokkas's lip quivered as he tried not to let out a comically loud sob. He didn't want Zuko to feel like he had to console him, but he felt for the guy. A lot.

"You're so much cooler than I thought", Sokka blurted out when he couldn't think of anything else. Gulping. He gestured widely: "The way you just- And then. And now you're here? With us? Helping Aang bring balance and whatnot and it must've been really fucking hard."

Blinking slowly, Zuko stared at him. His face didn't look so closed off anymore, on the contrary, there was something akin to wonder there. And surprise. Zuko looked surprised. His cheeks heated up with a faint flush and the air between them got a little warmer. Hadn't team Avatar told him that he'd done good, changing sides, yet? Had anyone?

"You're amazing", Sokka boosted, "not just all handsome and strong and cool and all that, but freaking amazing!"

He averted his eyes at the compliment. Zuko was kind of speechless but tried to brush Sokka's words off with a murmur. Sokka wouldn't have it. He pushed in closer and, without thinking, grabbed Zuko's face to turn it back to him.

"No, I mean it. You're amazing. You're amazing. You're amazing." He took a deep breath, staring into those wide ember eyes with sturdy determination. "You're so strong, Zuko, not just like physically, which we all know from first-hand experience. But like, the things you overcame to get here. And now you're making friends with everyone and I know your uncle isn't here right now but from what you've told me he'd be so proud. I'm proud, too- to- to be your friend and all that, I mean. And proud to have you as part of our little ragtag team."

With Sokka's hands still holding Zuko's cheeks in place, he couldn't do much besides listen and stare and give the faintest little nod.

"Thank you, I- thanks," Zuko whispered a few beats later and Sokka beamed at him. "You can let go of my face now."

As he spoke, Sokka's eyes drifted down to Zuko lips, lingering for a second. He was so overwhelmed with feelings - somewhere in the back of his head he was reminded that Zuko hadn't flinched or pulled away from his touch the way he should've expected him to and that added a whole new sensation to his emotions. Zuko trusted him. Part of Sokka wanted to lean in and press a kiss to those blood-stained lips, to get some of those feelings overwhelming out of his system. It was a strange and sudden urge that Sokka barely managed to restrain. He'd have to examine that one later. For now, he let his admiration wash over the hurt he felt in Zuko's place. He wanted him to know how far he'd come.

"Oh, right. Sorry, man." He just let go of Zuko's face, but his fingertips remembered the soft skin so vividly that he wasn't sure he'd pulled away at all. Sokka's thumb had brushed against the scar and found it to be even softer than the rest. What was he supposed to do with that kind of information? "Thanks, uh, for not burning my hands off just now."

"Maybe", Zuko swallowed and looked at the river, hesitating before he went on, "you could help me clean up."

Sokka's mouth fell open wordlessly.

"Only because, just now" he flexed his shoulders nervously, Zuko hadn't even looked this awkward when he was talking about his medical trauma. "I didn't mind when you touched my face. And I'm being too careful with my nose, so I don't think I can get it done right."

"I'd love to!" Sokka cringed instantly at himself. "Not love to, but you know, happy to help. Besides, can't let you back to camp like that. You might scare away the children."

Zuko huffed a laugh, "I'm sure it's not that bad."

"Oh buddy, you have no idea." He smiled and Zuko smiled back and Sokka thought 'Yes, this feels right'. Something fundamental had shifted in their friendship when Zuko opened up. Sokka wanted to lean in again, press their smiles together and bask in the flutter of his heart. He was almost tempted to try when a wet piece of cloth hit his face.

"Better get to it then."

"Oh, you're bossy, huh? Should've guessed." Sokka pulled the piece of fabric away from his nose and scooted impossibly closer. "Alright, my liege, I'm gonna scrub that crusty blood off you now. And afterwards, I'm gonna ask Katara if she can show me what I can do to help your nose, deal?"

"You mean, if I don't accidentally burn your hands off now, I'll get another chance to do it later?" Zukos's tone was mostly playful but he didn't manage to hide the nervous tremor underlying every word. Sokka could see the tension building on his face too.

Gently, he put his left hand back on Zuko's jaw, thumb stroking his cheek in a shy attempt to calm the other boy down. Starting at his chin, Sokka got to work. He worked his way up carefully and in small circles. Most of the blood washed off with ease, but Sokka had to rinse the tissue a few times before even reaching Zuko's nose. The faint blue tint of a blooming bruise made the break look worse than it was, Sokka hoped.

He had never been so careful in his life, but Sokka managed to clean Zuko's nose without even a spark of fire coming from the teen. Granted, he was tense all over, trembling with tension and his eyes clenched shut with pain here and there, but Zuko remained still and quiet while Sokka murmured praises. Before long Zuko looked like a person again, as opposed to a flesh-eating monster.

"Much better." Sokka pulled the piece of cloth away and marvelled at his handy work. He bit back another comment at how handsome he found Zuko to be. "See, that wasn't so hard, was it? Guess you're not as traumatized as you tho-"

The interruption came in the form of wet lips pressing down on Sokkas. His brain couldn't play catch up as quickly as necessary and by the time Sokka fully realized what was happening why his lips were tingling and his cheeks burning hot - Zuko was kissing him, on the mouth with his lips, that's what was happening - Zuko already pulled away.

"I'm sorry!" He pushed himself away from Sokka, a panicked look on his face. "I don't know why I did that. Shit. I'm sorry, Sokka. It won't happen again, can we just forget about this?"

It had been a while since Sokka felt this warm, fluttery feeling in his stomach that spread out like a cat owl's wings. He remembered it vividly though. The skips of his heartbeat when Yue first held his hand and the way his brain short-circuited whenever she looked at him with fondness. The spark of adrenaline from Suki's undivided attention. Zuko frantically looking away and trying to come up with excuses for the kiss felt like that, too. Maybe Sokka didn't need to set time aside to evaluate what caused his stomach to happily twist and turn whenever he was around Zuko, after all. Maybe he just had to rush in after Zuko, grab his face again, kiss him fiercely, hase after the feeling that filled him from ponytail to toe.

Zuko yelped loudly, breaking their kiss instantly and roughly. "Ouch! Sokka! What what you're doing-"

"What? Oh shoot, I'm sorry, are you okay? Did I bump your nose or something-"

"Clearly", Zuko's hand hovered over his nose to protect it from further injury. He took a steadying breath to calm down and sort his feelings.

"So I guess I shouldn't try to kiss it better, either, right?"

"I swear, if you try that I will actually burn your entire head off."

"Dramatic."

"Well..." Zuko's face flushed pink at Sokka's smirk, "just, just be careful, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah", Sokka pulled Zuko's hands away from his face with a gentle grip on his wrists. "Just to clarify, that was an invite to try and kiss you again, right? Cause I really wanna kiss you again, man."

Slowly, using all his strength to pace himself, Sokka leaned in again. He got the angle right this time and Zuko moved in closer, kissing him back. This third attempt of a kiss was much better than the first two. Soft and slow and still anxious but sweeter than honeydew, warmer than fire, better than air - Sokka had never kissed anyone like that.

"Damn, you're even good at kissing", Sokka murmured when they pulled apart.

"Just wait until I don't have a broken nose anymore."

Sokka blushed, instantly eager to find out what a kiss that's inherently less careful feels like. He tries not to imagine their lips meeting in haste and bodies pressed together with urgency. Sokka was a teenager after all if he didn't put a stop to this right now -

"Does that mean you'll see Katara? So we can do some super reckless kissing?"

Zuko hesitated, and Sokka nudged his side: "Come on. Might be worth it. Just think about it. We could do so much more kissing, Zuko."

Zuko narrowed his eyes at him, and Sokka grinned.

"Seeing Katara does beat you asking her for instructions." Zuko shook his head with an exasperated sigh. The lack of literal sparks between them, even when Sokka had accidentally hurt his nose sent a spark of confidence through him that was clearly visible in Zuko's straightened posture.

"I really like you, but no way will I let you straighten my nose, Sokka. That was a terrible idea, just so you know."

Sokka leaned in with a wide smile.

"So, you really like me, huh?"

Zuko held Sokka's gaze steadily.

"So what if I do?"

"I really like you too", Sokka smirked and bit down the urge to kiss Zuko again, lest he hurt the guy in all his excitement. Again. There it was again, that feeling, growing in intensity. "If you try, I'll even hold your hand when Katara fixes up your pretty face."

Sokka half expected and half hoped for a playful jab at his suggestion, because this was quickly getting out of hand, but the euphoria of requited affection made it difficult to reign in the flirting. Not five minutes ago they'd been talking about some serious stuff, nursing a budding friendship and now? But instead of joking around and playing it down, Zuko lowered his gaze and spoke quietly.

"Thank you." He'd like to hold Sokka's hand very much. And Sokka's heart skipped a beat. Yeah, he was going to feel all kinds of fluttery when he'd get to hold Zuko's hand for the first time, too, no doubt.

"Alright. What are we waiting for, then? Let's get your nose back in shape so we can make out some more."