Leah
Never again. I was swearing off champagne after waking up to a stomach that wanted to revolt and a head I wished I could remove from my body.
Sam was gone leaving Paul and myself here. I made my way out of bed and to the kitchen to try and attempt cooking breakfast with only one working hand. I figured if Paul was fed he would be easier to put up with. He seemed to not be picky as long as there was food to eat.
My phone ringing grabbed my attention from the mess I was making with my breakfast attempt. Paul perked up when he saw the name come across my phone screen. Paul looked like hell this morning, with the exception of this moment. I didn't know why he and Rachel were getting a divorce. I hadn't asked and I didn't particularly care. She was lucky to be getting away from such a vile man. I was convinced Rach would move to Hawaii with her sister. She wasn't particularly close to Jake or Billy, and I didn't know what else would keep her here now that her marriage was over. Shaking those thoughts from my head I turned my attention to answering my phone.
"Good morning, Bells." I answered.
"Oh, it's certainly not a good morning." She responded. "My head is pounding. Do you guys want some doughnuts? You said Paul stayed there, right? I can grab a dozen on my way over."
Paul smiled and nodded. It disgusted me how he was pining after Bella. Not even a day after announcing his divorce. If I still had respect for him, it would be gone. Even though Bella and Edward weren't particularly serious, I knew she wouldn't leave him for the likes of Paul Lahote.
"That sounds good. See you soon."
Mere seconds had passed since our call ended before Paul started to grill me about Bella. What part of the hospital did she work in? Was she still with Edward? Were they happy together?
His fascination with Bella was so puzzling to me. He and Sam had talked so poorly about her before for being with Edward. I didn't give him any information. I knew a lot about Bella, but I told him I didn't. We hadn't ever been very close, so it wasn't unreasonable for him to believe she'd shared little about her personal life with me.
Bella had never been very graceful, but this morning she was moving much better than I was. Her long hair was perfectly straightened and pulled back into a high ponytail. I could tell Alice had been supplying her clothes by the luxury athletic clothing she wore. At least she was miserable in style, I guess. Her clothes certainly put my simple leggings and oversized t-shirt to shame. I hadn't even bothered to brush my hair, much less straighten it.
She sat the box of doughnuts down in the kitchen and started to gag. It was probably the scent of my breakfast mess. Before I could get up, Paul was helping her to the bathroom. I didn't warn him about Bella. She had always been shy when we were younger, but the Cullens had brought her out of her shell. She knew where the bathroom was and I assumed she wore her hair back so she wouldn't need anyone else to hold it for her while she puked.
Paul came out of the bathroom with his tail between his legs and I knew Bella had snapped at him.
"Help me out here, Lee." He pleaded. "How can I make Bella like me?"
I laughed. "Okay, so, first; why would I help you? Second, I can't make Bella like you. She hates you for bullying Jake, Quil, and Embry."
He growled. "I hate those fucking guys. It's their fault she hates me."
I stood from my seat and pushed my hands down on the table, but instantly repositioned myself to take the pressure off of my wrist. My new position didn't seem as intimidating, but I think he knew I had a point to make.
"That is exactly my point." I told him. "You bullied her friends. They didn't start shit with you, you went out of your way to make them miserable. But you can't own up to your mistake. If you even want a chance at her liking you, you're going to have to own your own actions, Paul. It is your fault and only your fault she doesn't like you. Until you make it right with them she's not going to change her mind."
He hung his head but didn't respond. I didn't care what he thought. He'd tell Sam that I'd been rude, but I didn't care about that either. Sam wouldn't love me even if I tiptoed around Paul, so it really didn't matter.
Bella came out of the bathroom looking poised as ever and we settled on the couch to binge watch some reality tv. I looked forward to a day of good company and horrible television, though I could settle with only the latter. Paul Lahote was nothing if not persistent. He spent the entire day with us.
I wished Bella wouldn't talk so much. She told Paul all about working at the hospital and how friendly the Cullens were to both of us. My heart clenched when she mentioned Embry.
"Embry is so sweet, isn't he?" She asked me. "It was so nice of him to go to the gala with you."
I was horrified. Sam was furious enough that I'd gone with the Cullens, I didn't need him thinking I'd went with another man on top of that. Paul was staring at me waiting for my response.
"We didn't go together." I corrected her. "But he is really kind. We work together in the clinic."
This didn't satisfy Paul, I could tell. I wasn't going to push the issue further.
She nodded. "He works in the ER with me, too. I'm trying to get transferred back to labor and delivery. Carlisle says he's working on it."
"Do you like working with babies?" Paul asked her.
Paul knew about my fertility struggles, but Bella didn't. I tried to block out the conversation while she gushed for almost an hour about how magical being pregnant would be and how badly she wants to be a mother. I hoped Bella could have kids, but I didn't want to talk about it. Paul agreed with almost everything Bella said, disagreeing just often enough that she wouldn't be suspicious of him.
I eventually asked Paul to go get us lunch to get rid of him for awhile. He asked Bella to go with him but she said she was afraid she'd get carsick. I called in our order at the diner in Forks and he took off in my car.
"I'd kill to know why he and Rach are splitting up." Bella said after he left. "He seems amazing."
I slapped her arm and laughed at her. "You tore into him yesterday! Besides, what about Edward?"
She shrugged. "People can change, Leah. Edward and I haven't ever been serious, just keeping each other company really."
There was a small silver lining, knowing that Bella wouldn't be hurt when things ended with her and Edward. She told me she'd mostly stayed because she loved the Cullens, minus Rosalie, and didn't want to lose them. I knew she wouldn't lose them but I bit my tongue. I wasn't pushing her toward Paul.
It was strange to me how naturally everything flowed between them. They'd been basically strangers to each other before. Sure, she'd known of him when they were younger, but they didn't know each other. Sam and Paul had been friends for a long time, but I'd known Paul when we were babies. He lived next door to me, and I knew a lot more about the abuse he suffered at the hand of his parents than he thought I did.
I didn't feel sorry enough for Paul to excuse what a horrible person he was, though. I couldn't let my friend fall into his trap.
"I'm sure a guy with a body count as high as his knows how to manipulate a girl." I told her. "I have known Paul our entire lives, and I think he's exactly the same person he was when he bullied your friends. I'll support you if you decide to go for it, I just don't want to see you get hurt."
I knew Bella was a virgin and I felt bad watching her face fall. She couldn't have thought he would be a virgin too, after being married for years. Bella has certainly tried to change her status. She'd basically begged Edward to sleep with her, but he wouldn't. He was a virgin too, and he believed in waiting for marriage. I wasn't surprised when Rosalie told me. Edward had always been an old fashioned guy.
The sparkle in Bella's eyes came back as soon as Paul did. He looked at me uneasily and tossed my phone to me before he sat down next to Bella.
"Grabbed yours by accident. Sorry I didn't realize until a message came through."
I looked down and saw the messages and realized Paul had seen the ones from Embry. I knew he'd tell Sam, and my anger quickly changed to fear. I didn't try to defend myself. There was no point. Paul already knew the truth.
I was silently grateful that Embry hadn't texted anything that was too incriminating. He had told me Carlisle had a flat tire and offered me a ride; that was all Sam would know.
Paul wasn't mean to me again after that, and Bella didn't realize he'd read my texts. She was oblivious because all of her attention was on the disgusting man sitting between us.
The day was actually really fun with the two of them, the way I wished things would've been all of these years with Sam. If Sam was the man I'd known when we were kids, the four of us would mesh so well. I knew eventually Bella would be a part of a circle I still didn't fit into. Sam would love anyone that was with his best friend.
After lunch, Paul insisted we get out of the house. We went to the beach and I watched the two of them flirt and play with each other. I was jealous. They'd only just met and Paul was so enamored with her. I would kill for Sam to look at me the way he was her. I felt a pang of guilt when I realized the way Paul looked at Bella was the same way Embry looked at me.
In another life, Embry and I could be perfect. If only I had met him before Sam. I couldn't leave Sam after everything I'd put us through with loss after loss.
Paul was chasing Bella down the beach and I sat down, putting my bare feet in the water. I could remember all of us coming here as kids. Embry was here too, but I never noticed him. I only had eyes for Sam. He would carry me in his strong arms like Paul was doing with Bella now, throwing me in the water and then swimming out to get me. I missed who Sam used to be.
I had to wonder if it was worth it to stay with Sam, hoping the old version of himself would resurface. I'd walk through hell a thousand times for that man, but what if I never had him again? What if we both spent the rest of our lives in this vicious cycle of pain, hurt, and misery?
Sam sat down next to me, and I was surprised to see him. He was barefoot, doing the same thing as me.
"Paul told me about your texts." He muttered. "Why didn't you tell me you rode with Embry? I wouldn't have even been mad if you hadn't hid it from me."
I hung my head. "I'm sorry, Sam. I should have told you, but Paul was distraught over Rachel and there wasn't a good time."
He nodded. I expected more of an angry reaction, but he was emotionless as he laced his fingers with mine. I used to feel something when Sam touched me, but I didn't now. Not the way I had with Embry last night.
"I need you to promise me that you won't tell Rachel about Paul and Bella. I know it seems sudden, but they're right for each other." He said. He seemed so sure of Paul and Bella from the few interactions he'd seen between them on the beach today. "Don't tell Rosalie either. I'm sure Bella will tell Alice, but I don't want you caught in the crossfire when this thing with Rachel blows up."
I knew he was only looking out for Paul, but it was easy to delude myself into thinking he was concerned for me.
"I promise you I won't say a word." I told him.
He didn't say anything else, we just sat together for awhile watching the waves crash against the shore. Paul and Bella came to us eventually and asked if we'd go cliff diving with them. Sam went often with his friends, but I'd never been invited. Bella had changed into a pair of biker shorts and a t-shirt at my house so her clothes wouldn't get wet, and her stick straight hair was soaked and messy now.
Sam agreed and we followed them to one of the lower cliffs than the one they usually jumped from. Paul held Bella in his arms as he ran off the cliff, and she screamed the whole way down. Sam chuckled at them and smiled as he looked at me.
"Ready? We can hold hands and jump together or I can carry you like he did Bella."
"You should probably carry me. I'm afraid to jump." I confessed.
I was excited as Sam reached for me, but the feeling left me as quickly as it came on. For the first time in my life, being in Sam's arms felt so wrong. I felt a pain of guilt, as if what I was doing with my husband was morally as wrong as it felt emotionally.
I smiled and giggled like he'd expect, but I was in agony. I couldn't wait for us to hit the water so he'd let go of me. Being in Embry's arms had felt so right, and I couldn't understand why this felt so horrible.
I told Sam when we made it back to the beach that I was tired and wanted to go back home, and he didn't offer to walk back with me. I wasn't surprised.
It was easier to overlook Sam's abusive behavior when he was with me, or when I got glimpses of the man I used to love. But today, when he held me in his arms at the beach, I only felt empty.
The lies I'd told to Rosalie over and over suddenly made me sick. I wasn't protecting Sam, I was hurting myself. She could probably see right through all of them even though she only called me out the one time. I looked down at my broken wrist and remembered what happened. He hadn't accidentally hurt me. There was acid in his tone when he'd grabbed me and scolded me for what I'd said to Paul.
I didn't know how long Sam would be gone with Paul, but I knew he'd want dinner when he got home so I took a shower and started cooking. Paul came back first, telling me he'd take Bella home in Forks. We had two guest bedrooms, and Paul was moving into the one on the opposite side of the house. The one I used was right next to Sam.
Bella promised Paul she'd break up with Edward the following day. I wasn't surprised after the way she'd interacted with Paul all day.
"B said something interesting when I dropped her off." Paul said as he took a seat at the dining room table.
I made a plate and sat it in front of him. "Oh? What'd she say?"
He smirked. "Oh, lots of interesting stuff. For one, she told me Edward drove you home from the gala."
The color flushed from my face as I turned around to meet his dark eyes.
"She also told me your boy toy was the one to take her home and he told her to stay away from me. You can tell him it'd be wise for him to keep his mouth shut."
"Paul, I have been so kind to you today." I reminded him. "I don't know what Embry told her, but she would've actually listened to me if I told her to stay away from you."
The smirk on his face was replaced with a gentle smile. "I know, LeeLee. I do appreciate you." His smile dropped into a slight frown. "You have to know my loyalty lies with Sam, though."
I nodded and went to the fridge to get him something to drink.
"For what it's worth, I really do care about you." He told me as I handed the drink to him. "I wish you'd get away from Sam. He's never going to change."
I didn't respond. How bad did my marriage have to be for Paul Lahote to be telling me to leave my husband? His best friend?
Sam came home sweaty and his white shirt was stained with black marks.
"Where have you been?" I asked. "I thought you went back to work, but you don't usually come home dirty."
He grabbed the plate of food I'd been making and sat down next to Paul.
"Unlike Carlisle, Emily had an actual flat tire. I changed it for her, that's how I ruined the shirt." He explained.
My blood boiled. He was calling Rosalie a liar, and he'd been with Emily. I'd never known of the two of them talking outside of family dinners before now.
"Why would she call you?" I demanded. "She's been so desperate for your attention lately."
Paul's eyes went wide when I mentioned Emily, and Sam had the same acid in his tone he'd had the night he broke my wrist when he responded. Sam stood to come toward me, but Paul blocked his path and shook his head.
"She can call me whenever she'd like." He looked at Paul. "Come on, we've got a meeting with the council to get to."
To say I was shocked would be an understatement. Sam had never calmed down when he was angry at me without screaming or hurting me, and Paul had certainly never stood in his way. I nodded at Paul as he walked out the door, and I knew he understood my silent message of thanks. Maybe Bella would be good for him after all.
A few hours passed before Paul came back, and he looked angrier than usual. He went straight to the fridge and warmed up some leftovers from dinner. He didn't say a word to me. No mention of what had happened before they left, or how their meeting went.
When Sam finally arrived, he burst through the door and slammed it so hard I was afraid it would fly off of the hinges. He met my gaze with dark eyes consumed with anger and hatred. I was more afraid of Sam in that moment than I ever had been before. I sank backwards against the couch and didn't say a word. He went back to his bedroom and slammed the door. Paul got up to follow him, but looked back at me before he went in.
"Maybe you should go outside, Leah. You could read a book on the patio or something." He suggested.
I was even more afraid. Were they going to fight? Why did he want to get rid of me? I didn't object, though. Paul had protected me earlier, so I was trying to trust him. I grabbed my favorite book from my shelf and went out to the back patio.
I loved to read. I didn't make as much time for it as I should. Seth had helped me pick outdoor furniture a few years ago, and he insisted I get a comfy chair to read in. It was a little cold, so I grabbed a throw to put over my legs as I read.
I wasn't far into the second chapter of my book when the back door slammed. I saw Sam come out and stomp off away from me. His body shook with anger. I didn't bother him, mostly because I was too afraid. His garage was a decent distance from our home and had its own driveway, so I assumed that's where he was going.
I hadn't read much more at all when I heard growling. Not the way I'd heard Seth growl a few times now, an animal. I looked around and it took me a few minutes in the dim light from my porch to see it. There was a giant black wolf stalking toward me.
Wolves were sacred to our tribe. We were said to be descendants of wolves, according to the legends Billy told us around bonfires. Those legends also said vampires were real, so I didn't believe them. Right now, though, there was a ferocious wolf standing in front of me with eyes that looked just like my husband's.
"Sam!" I screamed. "Sam, help me!"
His garage was so far away, he must not have heard. I backed up in my chair, so far that it turned over. I tried to use it as cover, but the wolf kept slowly moving toward me.
"Sam, please!" I shouted as loud as I could.
The next few minutes passed in a blur. I didn't think animals truly understood English, but it was like my calls for my husband set it off. I didn't feel any pain as it's claws tore into my skin. I shrieked the entire time, but Sam didn't come to help, and neither did Paul. I couldn't fight back. My wrist was broken, and even if it wasn't, I wasn't strong enough to fight a wolf.
I've always heard that before you die you see your entire life flash before your eyes. I had so many regrets. Not leaving Sam the first time he hit me, not going to medical school, and the biggest regret; not being with Embry.
I knew this wolf would kill me. It stopped its assault for a second, letting my lifeless form fall to the ground. I could feel my face stinging, all the way down to my arms. Would Sam care when I died? Would he be relieved?
I let out one last plea. I didn't call for Sam. He wasn't coming.
"Paul, please. It's going to kill me." I tried to yell but it came out as more of a whisper.
I started to lose consciousness when I saw a silver wolf appear. It looked into my eyes, only this time I felt safe instead of horrified. The wolves started to snarl at each other and my silver savior tore into the black wolf. I pushed myself up from the ground and saw the pool of blood I left behind me. I could barely walk, but I had to get into the house. I needed Seth.
It wasn't a far walk around my home to the door, but it felt like miles with my injuries. I fell to the ground about halfway there. I called out for Paul again, which seemed stupid since he hadn't helped me this far. I tried to get up again, and the silver wolf was back. There was blood in its coat, but I couldn't find any puncture wounds as I petted its soft fur. It nudged me up from the ground and supported me until I made it to the porch. I sat down on the steps and leaned against the railing. The wolf walked past me, right inside my house. It came back with my cell phone, sitting it in my lap.
The wolf stayed by my side while I waited for Seth, licking my wounds and putting pressure in all the right places to help stop the bleeding. I knew this wolf was a spirit warrior, like the legends said. Was he someone I knew? Could he be one of our ancestors? If this wolf was a warrior, could it mean the other one was too?
When Seth's lights were visible in the driveway, the wolf disappeared. He left me with a lick on my face and a whimper. I didn't know if I'd survive the night, but if I did, I hoped I'd see the silver wolf again.
