I had kissed Tanya once before. It had been an accident that I still couldn't explain. This time it was on purpose and part of me wondered why I had waited until now to do it. I could taste a hint of the beer she had sipped on her lips.

I moved closer to her, my hands left her dress to wrap around the back of her neck. She wasn't kissing me back and for some reason that wasn't registering in my brain. If I hadn't been drinking I would be embarrassed and panicking but I was too focused on what I was doing to care.

The kiss was over almost as soon as it began. Tanya gently pushed me away. Her eyes were dark, much darker than they were when we got here. I was vaguely aware of the nearby people watching us in stunned silence. "Bella," she said softly.

You don't want me? I asked her. This was familiar in a way that was making me nauseous.

I couldn't really believe that to be true but I couldn't think of another reason for her to end that kiss.

"Bella, of course I want you," Tanya started. "But you're drunk and I'm not entirely convinced you're aware of your actions." She leaned forward to kiss my forehead. "I will not take advantage of you. If, when you're sober, you still want to kiss me… I will be more than happy to participate."

I swayed and Tanya grabbed ahold of my arms to hold me steady. "Are you okay?" she asked concerned.

I feel… I didn't know the word for sick so I mimicked vomiting.

Tanya nodded in understanding. "Come on, I'll take you to the bathroom," she said. She wrapped an arm around my waist and guided me up the stairs to one of the bathrooms.

The bathroom was empty so Tanya dragged me inside and locked the door behind us. She gently eased me on the floor next to the toilet and slid to the ground beside me. I removed the fangs and put them in my pocket. I did not want vomit all over them.

Tanya gently rubbed my back as I leaned over the toilet. "Irina," Tanya said. "Bring some water to the bathroom please."

Although I didn't hear a reply, I know Irina heard her and was going to follow her request. Sure enough, a few minutes later there was a knock at the door. Tanya got up to unlock the door. I turned my head just as Irina walked in. She handed Tanya the water bottle before leaving again. Tanya locked the door and moved back to my side.

"How are you feeling?" Tanya asked as she went back to rubbing my back. I glanced at her and shrugged. "Same?" I nodded.

She put her hand to my forehead, it felt nice. I assumed she was checking to see if I was sick. She left her hand there for a minute before realizing even if I was sick, her skin was too cold to tell the difference. She went to withdraw her hand but I grabbed it and held it against my head.

Feels nice, I told her.

"Do you want to leave?" Tanya questioned.

I don't want to pull you away from the party, I signed.

"I could care less about the party," Tanya said. "The only thing that matters is you."

I want to leave, I admitted. Food might help with the drinks.

"Then we will go," Tanya said. She helped me off the ground.

What about Kate and Irina? I knew they could easily run home but I didn't want to force them to.

"We'll come back for them when they're ready to leave," Tanya said, not only to me but them as well.
"They agree."

Okay. Can we go now? The last thing I wanted was to sit on this dirty floor longer than necessary.

"Are you going to be okay?" Tanya asked concerned.

I didn't feel as nauseous as before but my stomach was in knots. I don't know, I admitted. It was hard to tell if my stomach would rebel as soon as I started moving.

"Then we'll wait here for a few," Tanya decided.

I moved away from the toilet so I could lay my head against her shoulder. Tanya pressed the bottle of water into my hands. "Drink it," she said gently. "It'll help with the hangover."

I pulled away so I could raise an eyebrow at her. Do you have much experience with… that?

Tanya snorted. "Of course not," she said. "But, working in bars, I saw plenty of drunk people. I also heard a lot of people say that water is best. I have some medications at home if you need them later. Or we can stop at the store."

I will be okay. Or at least I hoped I would be. I never had alcohol before tonight so I wasn't sure what to expect. My only wish was to not throw up in front of Tanya, or on Tanya.

"How are you feeling?" Tanya asked after a few minutes.

Better, I signed honestly. The water helps.

"Are you ready to go?" Tanya asked. I nodded. "Irina put some water bottles in the car for you. We can stop at the gas station for crackers if you need them."

Tanya got off the ground and helped me up. "Still good?"

I'm fine. I want to leave.

Tanya helped me out of the bathroom and down the stairs. No one batted an eye at our reappearance. There were so many drunk people that I doubted any of them remembered me kissing Tanya earlier. Claire hadn't found me either so I assumed Kate had told her I was leaving.

Once we were outside of the house, Tanya lifted me into her arms. There was no one around to see her full strength. She adjusted me in her arms so she could open the door to the car. She gently put me inside and buckled me up.

Anchorage was a beautiful town. It was dark and I couldn't see much but what I could see I really enjoyed. I would love to come back another day.

It wasn't a large city compared to Phoenix or even Seattle but it was the largest in the state. There was so much to do here based on the research I had done before moving to Alaska.

Tanya had offered to take me to Anchorage back when we first met. I wondered if that offer was still on the table. Or if I had managed to ruin everything with that kiss.

She pulled into the parking lot of a Denny's. It was likely the only thing still open this late at night. She was out of the car and at my door by the time I got the seatbelt unbuckled. She held out her hand and I took it.

"Do you still feel sick?" Tanya asked concerned.

I shook my head. A little… I frowned. Lightheaded, I spelled out since I didn't know the word for that.

Tanya wrapped her arm around my waist to help keep me steady. We slowly walked to the front of the restaurant.

It wasn't that busy when we got there. There were a few groups of people, mostly young adults that appeared to have finished their Halloween plans, much like us.

All eyes went to Tanya. With her dressed the way she was, it wasn't surprising. At least they weren't ogling her like those frat boys. Tanya kissed my forehead before leading up to the register where an older woman was waiting.

"Table for two," Tanya requested politely.

"Right this way," the woman said. She grabbed two menus and led us to a booth. Tanya helped me into the booth before sliding in beside me. If the woman was surprised she didn't say anything. She sat the menus down in front of us.

"Can I get you ladies anything to drink?"

"Water?" Tanya asked me. I nodded. "Water, for both of us," Tanya told her.

I scanned the menu in an attempt to find something that was appealing. The pictures of food were making my stomach turn. I closed the menu and pushed it aside.

"Are you feeling sick again?" Tanya asked. I nodded. "Would you like help picking something out?" I nodded again.

I leaned against her and closed my eyes while she read through the menu. The waitress returned with our waters. I opened my eyes. "Are you ready to order?" she asked us.

"She'll have pancakes with scrambled eggs and bacon," Tanya ordered. "And I'll take the chicken and dumpling soup with crackers." She handed back the menus.

The woman nodded and wrote everything down. "Anything else I can get you?"

"No, that is it," Tanya said.

Can we come back to this town? I asked her.

"Of course, whenever you want," Tanya promised. "Is there something in particular you want to do here?"

Yes, I'll show you what I found later, I told her. There was no way I could sign all the activities I looked up.

"Did you enjoy your first college party?" Tanya asked.

I finished my water and pushed it aside. Tanya put her untouched water in front of me and took my cup. Not really, I admitted. It's really not my thing.

Tanya frowned. "Why didn't you say something before the party?"

I shrugged. You guys seemed really excited about it. I didn't want to ruin it.

Tanya sighed. "I come to the parties for Kate," she started. "I could care less about hormonal college boys. I could have saved myself all of this." She gestured to her costume.

Sorry.

Tanya shook her head. "It's not your fault. Next year we'll do something else. Perhaps a movie and an assortment of food for you?"

Next year?

If Tanya could blush I'm pretty sure she would be. "It may be too soon to talk about plans for next year," Tanya admitted. "A year for us is nothing but for you it's considerably longer."

The waitress returned with our food. I took one look at it and wrinkled my nose. I leaned my forehead against Tanya's cool shoulder. I didn't want the food. I just wanted to coolness of her body.

"You should try to eat," Tanya muttered in my ear. "The eggs should be easy on your stomach and the pancakes should help soak up the alcohol. If that doesn't work you can drink the soup broth."

I reluctantly grabbed the fork and took a tiny bite of the eggs. My stomach felt okay. Not great but I didn't feel the immediate need to vomit. I ended up finishing them before I even looked at the pancakes. I added some butter but no syrup. I wasn't a huge fan of syrup as that amount of sugar made me jittery.

I took a tiny bite of the pancake. It tasted good, or about as good as you could expect from a chain diner, but for some reason I couldn't force myself to eat it. I would rather have more eggs.

I shook my head and pushed the plate away. "Is it making you sick?" Tanya asked moving the plate.

No but I would rather have… I tapped the finished plate of eggs.

Tanya nodded in understanding. She pulled the plate toward herself and pushed the soup to me. "Drink the broth and try to eat the crackers. I'll order you more eggs," Tanya muttered.

I sipped the broth while Tanya waved over the waitress. "Is there anything else I can get you?" she questioned.

"Two more orders of eggs," Tanya requested.

The woman nodded. "I'll be right back to refill your waters," she promised.

She left to put in the order for the eggs and a few minutes later returned with a pitcher of water. She refilled the glasses while I continued to sip the broth. It wasn't bad and helped my stomach.

I feel better, I told her.

"Good," Tanya said pleased. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have given you so much alcohol and I shouldn't have given you that second drink."

It's not your fault. I didn't have to drink it.

Tanya shook her head. "It's not that simple. You're my mate. I should have taken better care of you."

I took her hand and squeezed it. I let her hand go so I could sign again. Are we going to talk about what happened?

Her eyes met mine. "Do you want to talk about it?" she questioned. "Last time, you seemed happy to ignore it."

Last time I didn't know why I did it. This time I do.

"Because you were jealous," Tanya supplied. "I know. I felt it, just before the anger." I looked down. It was a stupid reason to kiss her, I knew that, but at the time I couldn't think of another way to let them know she was mine. "Bella, you don't have to prove anything, to me or to others. You are my mate, no one appeals to me, other than you. You don't need to claim me in front of other humans. I'm already yours, and only yours."

The waitress returned with my eggs. I took a few bites, trying to get my thoughts together. I'm sorry. Tanya shook her head and opened her mouth, probably to tell me, yet again, that I didn't have to apologize. Let me finish, please. Tanya nodded. I wish I could write this down because I feel like I'm going to mess it up.

"If you wish, we could continue this at home," Tanya suggested. "That way you have a chance to write it down."

I thought about it. On the one hand, I wanted to have this conversation. Tanya deserved to have this conversation. But on the other hand, I wasn't an expert at signing and there were probably many things that wouldn't translate properly.

Okay, later.

Tanya's phone buzzed. "That's Irina. She said they're done," Tanya said, showing me the message.

I glanced at the time. It was a little after eleven. It seemed rather early for a vampire to give up. It's a bit early.

Tanya laughed. "They never stay late. Once the frats boys are too drunk, they tend to leave. Otherwise they continuously hit on us. Claire went home too so there was no reason to stay." She glanced at my half-eaten eggs. "Are you still eating?"

I shook my head and pushed it away. "Do you want to take it with you?" she asked as she waved the waitress over.

No. I just want to go.

Tanya didn't bother asking for the check. She simply handed the woman a $100 bill and told her to keep the change. The woman's eyes widened in surprise and she was still muttering thanks to Tanya as we walked out of the diner.

I tried to get into the back of the car but Tanya wouldn't allow it. Something about if Kate and Irina had a problem with it then they could run home.

We pulled up in front of the house and a couple minutes later Kate and Irina walked out. They got into the back seat without a word and Tanya drove away.

"So, how was your night?" Kate asked me.

I turned and found her grinning. Well, no need to ask if she saw what happened.

"Katrina," Tanya growled.

Kate held up her hands. "Hey I wasn't the one that decided to claim a vampire in front of the entire fraternity," Kate protested.

Tanya's hands tightened on the steering wheel. I reached over to take her hand. She relaxed as soon as my hand touched hers. "You should rest," she told me. "We've still got a bit of a drive to go."

I let go of her hand so I could get comfortable, or as comfortable as you can get in a car, and closed my eyes.

I knew we were almost to the house when I heard the crunching of gravel underneath the tires. It startled me awake. I rolled my neck and winced at the pain. I must have slept in the same position the entire drive.

Tanya stopped the car. Irina and Kate got out, said something to Tanya, and took off running toward the woods. "They went hunting," Tanya informed me when she opened the passenger side door.

I nodded. I expected as much. I took her offered hand and got out of the car. "You look tired," she commented. "Would you like me to carry you?"

Considering I had already broken every one of my carefully constructed rules, I decided I had nothing to lose by agreeing. I nodded again and she gently lifted me into her arms. I laid my head on her chest as she carried me through the house and upstairs to her bedroom.

She sat me on her bed and moved to her dresser. She dug out two pairs of clothes, one she handed to me and the other she put on the desk. "We're close to the same size so those should fit. If not, I can get you something of Irina's."

I shook my head. Even if Tanya's clothes didn't fit, I would rather wear hers than Irina's. I stood up and looked around. "The bathroom is through there," Tanya said pointing to the door next to the dresser. "Top left drawer you will find a toothbrush, toothpaste and anything else you might need."

I quickly changed into Tanya's clothes. The pants were a bit short but the top fit perfectly. I dug through the drawers and grabbed a toothbrush, toothpaste, brush, deodorant and some face wash. I found a washcloth in the cabinet.

I washed the makeup off my face. It took a bit more work then I expected but I felt better once it was gone. I ran the brush through my hair and then quickly brushed my teeth. I threw on some deodorant before I left the bathroom.

Tanya changed while I was in the bathroom. She was wearing pants and an oversized t-shirt that said University of Alaska. She was lying in bed, a book in her hand. There was a pen and notebook on the bed next to her, ready for me to voice my thoughts.

"I got you some water and painkillers," she said. She didn't look up from her book as she gestured to the nightstand on what would be my side of the bed.

She finished whatever she was reading before closing the book and setting it aside.

Thank you, I signed.

"I brought you a notebook and pen," she said. "Not to rush you, I just thought it might be easier for you to… voice your thoughts."

I went over to the bed and grabbed the notebook and pen. I stared at the notebook as if I thought the words would magically appear. I didn't even have a chance to write anything before I was sound asleep.