Ymir hears the alarm before she even comes into full consciousness. Her body's heavy, feeling as if someone was forcing her down and giving her no choice but to stay in bed. She wouldn't mind, her head's well acquainted with the pillow at this point and the temptation to fall back to sleep is there. The problem is that the sound of the alarm is growing louder, more persistent, and she knows she can't sleep through something so loud and annoying.

She gets up with ease, to her own surprise, and makes the short distance between her bed and the alarm, turning off her clock.

Another day.

The thought is hollow and exhausted.

Ymir stands there, momentarily, rubbing the sleep from her eyes as the usual feeling of resentment and melancholy crawls from her stomach to her chest before finally settling and tightening her throat.

She goes through her usual routine of getting ready for school. When she eats breakfast, she limits herself and when she goes to brush her teeth, she has her back facing the mirror.

Stepping out of her home, she takes a deep breath and her chest still holds the same nagging feeling she's always had her whole life. She closes her eyes, wincing slightly as she feels a tide of dark emotions rush over her before she pushes through and goes to her car.

Historia Reiss is a girl that Ymir thought she understood. And while the blond continues to confuse her, there's a sort of relief she provides even if it's growing smaller and insignificant as the months go by. Ymir met Historia freshman year and somehow they gravitated towards each other in an unexplained way, despite their differences

It warms Ymir but she won't admit it. Though, the warmth has been slowly ebbing away, leaving a cold emptiness in its place.

Historia's rich. She has more maids, butlers, chaperones and whatever else you could name than she needs and yet she chooses Ymir to drive her to school.

Historia chooses Ymir to be a part of her morning routine.

Historia chooses Ymir.

And for now, that's enough.

Historia usually has her face tilted downwards as she stares at her phone. She hardly pulls her attention away from her device unless she has to or something genuinely catches her interest. Everytime Historia leaves her device and looks Ymir's way, Ymir always feels like she's soaring.

That soaring feeling is present at the moment and her heart rate continues to rise as she talks to Historia. It's meaningless chatter but Historia is looking her way and it's everything to Ymir.

They only have a few minutes before they have to get to their first class and Ymir always appreciates these moments they have. Their other friends who are part of their group are busy caught up in their own business and Ymir genuinely feels like it's just her and Historia in the world even if they were surrounded by plenty of people.

But then Historia's gaze drifts and Ymir follows, her words fading as she watches Historia look in a certain direction where Ymir isn't.

Eren Yaeger, Armin Arlert and Mikasa Ackerman are walking past the group from a distance. Armin is talking eagerly about something as the goth girl of the group is quick to reply back, an arm wrapped around Eren's as he listens silently. His amused smile betrays his tired green eyes and it's clear that he's enjoying himself with his friends.

Historia looks at him in a way that clearly has her interest.

Ymir's stomach curls and she suddenly feels sick. She swallows and she's having a hard time coming to terms with that.

It wasn't the first time Historia has done something in that nature. Ever since a conflict that involved Ymir and Reiner harassing the boy since Historia sent the two Eren's way, Historia's relationship with Eren has been unusual. One day Historia told Ymir to stop bullying Eren and Ymir obeyed even if she was confused on what initiated that decision. Ymir has never seen Historia talk directly to the boy but Ymir is oh so aware of the stares Historia sends his way and Eren doesn't even notice them.

Eren's so oblivious.

Ymir doesn't feel right.

Historia's so oblivious.

"Ymir," It's a whisper, a sweet breath tickling the shell of her ear. Ymir shifts in her seat for a moment as she feels Historia prod her back with the eraser of her pencil.

"What?" Ymir mumbles, a note of annoyance that is forced as she feels Historia lean away from her. She sits behind Ymir in their 6th period class. Ymir turns, pulling her gaze away from the projection on the whiteboard. She meets Historia's bored blue gaze. "What do you want?"

Historia's eyes flicker away from Ymir's eyes for a second and Ymir convinces herself that Historia isn't looking at her lips. Historia's eyes then return and her mouth forms a thin, expressionless line. "The answers. The paper is a grade."

"The paper is a grade," Ymir repeats a little absentmindedly. Her eyebrows furrow and the corner of her lip quirks slightly. Bertholdt is sitting not far from them and he's focusing on the documentary their teacher has thrown on. He's listening intently and clearly getting all the answers but Historia asks for Ymir's and for now that's enough.

The day after, when they get their papers back, this time graded, Bertholdt gets a 100 and Ymir a 90. Bertholdt's friend, Reiner, a well known jock is applauding him and making as much noise as he can in an excuse to be rambunctious. Historia watches them, lacking emotion before resuming her attention on her phone.

Historia doesn't acknowledge Ymir nor does she show any resentment. Still, Ymir feels the regret that washes over her and she wishes that Historia had just asked Bertholdt for the answers.

Ymir's head is pounding and her vision is going a little blurry but she walks steadily through the bleachers and makes her way down to where a massive celebrating crowd is shouting the most recent victory and final football game of the year. She even manages a teasing remark to Connie Springer, the class clown and pushes him out of her way. "Move it, cueball."

The small smile that was unintentionally resting on her face contorts into a crestfallen frown as she makes her way to the center of the sea of people.

Historia is dressed in her classic cherry red cheerleader outfit. The type of outfit that usually gets her pulse elevating but this time it doesn't have that same effect. She's starting to think that Historia won't ever again have an effect on her. Because Ymir hasn't been feeling like it's been enough lately and her chest is aching far worse than usual.

That cruel tightness in her throat is threatening to choke Ymir now and she isn't sure if she'll be able to breathe if she doesn't walk away now. But it's too late because Ymir doesn't turn around soon enough. Historia somehow finds Ymir's gaze past all the people between them. Somehow, Historia finds her and Ymir wants the ground to swallow her whole.

The blonde pulls away from Reiner, her lips still parted as she catches her breath from the kiss she shared with him. He's staring at her with the type of look you would expect someone like him would have when it comes to Historia Reiss kissing you. And as quick as it was to find Ymir's gaze, it's just as quick when Historia loses it. Historia smiles at Reiner, a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes.

It eases Ymir, slightly, but she still feels the self-hatred that clamps down on her heart and makes Ymir want to disappear.

...

"Why are you upset?"

"I'm not," Ymir replies, trying to replicate the normally empty tone that Historia puts on so naturally.

The school halls are busy as students try to make it to their next class, Ymir is standing at her locker, trying to act as if she's searching for something that isn't there. Her fingers press against the metal rim of the locker door and she tries to suppress the hurt that's far worse than the pain she usually feels.

Historia places a palm on her locker, shutting the door with an intentional slam that draws attention from the other students. The action just barely misses Ymir's face which earns Historia a forced glare because, honestly, Ymir probably deserves it.

"What's your problem?" Ymir tries to snarl but her voice falters and sounds more akin to a mumble. She doesn't meet those ocean blues of Historia's that are storming with frustration. It ticks off Ymir a bit as Ymir feels like Historia doesn't have the right to be frustrated. Historia has everything in the world and Ymir only has Historia. But now Ymir feels like she has nothing and it's a detachment that's eating her up on the inside.

"What's your problem?" Historia counters back and Ymir has to will herself not to walk away. She doesn't want to play this game, she doesn't have the energy.

Ymir decides to submit, briefly, and her features tense a bit as she says, "It's nothing, it doesn't matter. Stop worrying."

"I am not worried."

It hurts Ymir far more than she thinks it should. The taller girl frowns deeply and she turns away, not wanting to be late for class.

The clacking of Historia's heels follow behind her and Ymir has to wonder why Historia bothers wearing shoes like that when it's just high school. She already impresses people enough without her excessive accessories and to be fair, those few extra inches that the heels provide hardly do anything.

"Ymir," Historia's tone is almost commanding and it genuinely strikes a chord with Ymir. She doesn't succumb as Historia continues trying. "Ymir. Ymir. Ymir."

"Stop it, will you?" It almost sounds like a plea and the guilt that starts to form knots in her stomach makes her voice vulnerable. Ymir tries to stay strong and she swallows thickly as she sees her next class in sight. This is one of the few classes that they don't have together and for once, she's thankful.

"Why are you acting like this?" Ymir isn't sure if Historia's voice falters because the way Historia carries her words are coated with a thin layer of distaste that continues to stab into Ymir.

Ymir closes her eyes, strong emotions bubbling inside her and she feels extremely tired suddenly. Ymir wants to curl up and disappear. She wants the floors of their school to swallow her up. Ymir wants to be gone. She doesn't want to be here.

"Fuck off, Historia."

When Ymir opens her eyes, Historia isn't there.

Ymir catches sight of Eren, wandering alone with his usual unmotivated and brooding posture. She can't help but easily slink away from her clique and go to him. She's a little surprised that his two friends aren't with him but she doesn't let it bother her. It makes things more simple for her.

"Eren," Ymir calls, her voice hoarse and she isn't sure if it's from her sorrow or anger. Both, most likely.

He turns her way, his expressionless face shifting for just a moment as if he's caught off guard. He flinches slightly at the sight of her and she doesn't blame him.

Especially for what's about to come.

"What do you want?" Eren asks, his eyes drifting downwards as he stands still. Wherever he was going would have to wait it seems and Ymir respects him ever so slightly for even bothering to stay as she figures he knows what's about to come.

Ymir hasn't picked on him since Historia made amends with the boy. The thought aggravates her and she isn't really sure how the two even made up but it frustrates her because whatever happened between Eren and Historia has earned Eren Historia's attention. Even if it's from an afar. Even if Eren doesn't know about it.

Ymir thinks about Historia kissing Reiner and then she thinks about Historia staring at Eren with a sort of longing that Ymir stares at Historia with.

Ymir punches Eren.

The force is so strong that it sends the boy stumbling back and a part of Ymir feels terrible for what she's done but then another fist meets his stomach and next thing she knows, she has Eren curled up on the ground as she kicks him brutally.

Ymir is seeing red now and her chest is burning. It stings with bitterness and resentment and she knows she isn't mad at Eren, she just knows he's there and will take the beating even though he doesn't deserve it. It should be the other way around if anything.

Ymir should be laying on the ground and Eren should be beating the shit out of her.

Ymir isn't sure how long it lasts but next thing she knows there's shouting all around her and someone pulls her back. She immediately tears herself away from the grip and swerves around, baring her teeth as the anger continues to boil from within her.

It's Reiner who she faces and she hits him next.

She wants to curse him out and yell to the world how much she hates herself and everyone in it but the words are only contorted into a growl and her vision is getting blurry as her chest heaves and she's consumed by her emotions.

Ymir's conscious enough to know when someone opens her bedroom door. She digs her head further into her pillow, her eyes burning from the amount of tears she had shed during the night. She feels pathetic and there's a bunch of spite brewing at the pit of her stomach.

She's been suspended, lucky enough, and wasn't forced to go to an alternative school for her behavior. As expected, her parents didn't take too kindly to this occurrence and had grounded her but she knows they know that their punishment has little to no effect on her.

Sure, having no phone is an inconvenience but it didn't matter to Ymir. She didn't want to see the text messages her classmates had been sending her way and definitely didn't want to know what Historia was posting on social media now that Ymir was gone.

Ymir would rather sleep and yell at her parents when they tried to scold her because her mind wasn't willing to do anything else. She's been putting up a good fight against her parents and while she felt guilty, she was relieved that they were leaving her alone.

"Seems like you're enjoying your bonus vacation," A voice says that has Ymir flinching a little in surprise.

"Oh, Jesus Christ, they got you to come back," Ymir groaned, not lifting her head from the pillow. She doesn't even have to turn to know that her sister had a stern and unamused expression.

"Yeah, they did, and I'm here to get you out of bed," Traute replies, her voice lacking warmth.

"And do what exactly?"

"Anything that doesn't involve you holed up in your room."

"I like it in here," Ymir almost whines as her older sister makes an effort to pull the sheets off of Ymir. For a moment, they play a game of tug of war before Ymir gives up as she knows she doesn't have the energy to mess around. But instead of getting up, Ymir pulls her legs to her chest and she remains laying on her pillow as she faces her back to Traute. She pleads weakly, "Don't make me do this, Traute."

A hand reaches forward and rolls Ymir over. Ymir sees a sympathetic gaze and it makes her feel worse. Traute says gently, "Ymir, you can't live like this."

If Ymir had the energy, she would lash out but instead she succumbs easily, pushing away her bitter thoughts. I've lived like this my whole life.

"What made you beat up that poor kid?" Traute asks, a little out of nowhere as she sits in front of Ymir. Maybe as an act of genuine kindness or pity, her sister took her out to eat. Ymir still feels sick but she stomachs down the food. "You haven't given anyone a reason."

"Does there have to be a reason?"

"Ymir."

Ymir chuffs at Traute's seriousness and shrugs nonchalantly despite the guilt eating her up on the inside. "I was angry."

"Angry?"

Ymir nods and there's a silence that rests between them momentarily. Ymir thinks that Traute isn't going to press until her sister says, "Was it Historia?"

"No," Ymir immediately responds, nearly choking on her food. Just hearing the girl's name causes her stomach to twist in knots and her chest swim with sorrow. Ymir hits her own chest purposely, as if it would take out those emotions.

"Right," Traute's eyes narrow with a frown and she continues, "What happened?"

"It wasn't Historia," Ymir growls and even if Traute looks at her with disbelief, she doesn't care because it was the truth. It was Ymir. All Ymir. It was her own fault. Eren didn't deserve what she did to him.

"I've told you that girl is trouble, Ymir," Her sister says and Ymir wants to scream at her, but Ymir's throat is burning at the idea so she refrains. She doesn't want to ruin this even more, not here, not now. "She's daddy's little girl and she has all the money in the world. She isn't afraid to break hearts."

Traute's words cut deep. Ymir's seething at this point and she hates that her sister is saying such things about Historia. Because Historia was her friend despite it all and Traute doesn't understand the relationship between the two of them.

Historia chooses Ymir over anyone else. Historia wants Ymir to drive her to school everyday despite the fact that anyone could do that. Historia asks Ymir for answers despite her classmates being far smarter. Historia chooses Ymir even if she isn't good enough.

So why did Historia kiss Reiner?

Ymir's expression is a dead giveaway to Traute and her sister actually refrains from saying anything else. Ymir feels the slightest relief but she's still mad and she finishes her food in silence.

When they leave, Traute interrupts the silence between them again. "You're staying with me once this school year ends."

Ymir actually splutters despite her mouth and throat being extremely dry. "W-what?"

"Your summer break is just around the corner assuming you don't fail your finals," Traute's fingers tighten themselves around the steering wheel for a moment before loosening themselves. She rolls her shoulders. "The people here aren't good for you, Ymir. And you know it."

"Where do you want to take me?"

"There's a small town, by the coast and it has a decent college. It's where I'll be attending," Traute explains, sparing a glance at Ymir who looks as if she's been slapped in the face. "Maybe you can get a job there. If not, I'll find another way to keep you busy."

"Did Mom and Dad put you up to this?"

"It was a family discussion," Traute answers.

"Without my approval?" Ymir growls, slumping in the passenger's seat. She's ready to hear "we want what's best for you" but it never comes and Ymir can't help but feel a little disappointed.

When Ymir finally comes back to school, there's only a month before summer starts. She's still thinking about what her sister said and it bothers her to some extent but a part of her likes the idea of starting over. Of being in a town where no one knows her. Because currently, as she walks the halls, people are staring and whispering.

Ymir ignores them even if her insecurities fight at full force. She holds her head high and scowls at everyone who bothers making eye contact with her. She never makes an effort to search for Historia or the rest of their group. She imagines Historia has managed to have them turn on her or they're simply waiting for her to come to them. If it's the latter, they should know she's too stubborn to do that. She'd rather suffer alone than make amends or whatever they wanted her to do.

It only lasts till 1st period, when Ymir walks into her class and there's Historia, staring right at her. As usual, Historia holds a bored and unphased look. The sight of her has Ymir's insides churning.

Ymir's seat is right by her and she hates that she's so attached to the girl because it's the same way in their other classes together.

Ymir doesn't say anything to the girl as she takes her place and she purposefully looks the other way when she feels Historia ocean blue eyes sending crashing waves her way.

When Historia finally breaks the quietness between them, it's when the classroom is the loudest. They're working on some pointless worksheet that's only purpose is for the teacher to reach the grade requirements. The class was given permission to work with partners and the students were gladly taking advantage of that.

Except for Ymir and Historia.

Working solo, despite sitting next to each other.

Ymir is, admittedly, surprised when Historia doesn't ask for the answers and Ymir honestly wishes that she did. Because at least then she would know Historia needs her in some way.

"What did Eren do to deserve that?"

Ymir doesn't meet the girl's gaze, rather gripping her pencil tighter and bubbling in the answers intently.

She replies impassively, "Nothing."

They don't say anything to each other for the rest of the week.

Jean, unfortunately or not, is the only student who could hold a conversation with Ymir. Instead of keeping distance or staring at her warily, he approaches her with a wide sly smile and a cool glimmer in his eyes.

"I would have joined you if you had just told me," He said the day Ymir had returned from her suspension. "Oh, to miss the chance to beat the shit out of that bastard."

Sometimes Ymir isn't sure if Jean truly wants to hurt Eren or he's playing it up to keep their little rivalry going. She's sure the dynamic is mostly one sided though.

Speaking of Eren, when Ymir finally sees him again, he meets her gaze rather bravely in passing. While his facial expression was still blank as always, his green eyes had managed to radiate courage when she walked past him.

It unnerved Ymir a little.

She knew if Eren had some sort of motivation, he would fight back. She's a little thankful he doesn't but at the same time she's feeling even worse about it.

"Skipping class?"

Ymir stiffens momentarily and bounces off the wall she was leaning on. She turns her head to see her history teacher, Mr. Smith, coming her way. She responds, "Skipping lunch."

"Not hungry?" He asks, stopping a few feet away from her. Despite the soft look in his eyes, he held a rather intimidating and fierce aura even if he was probably the kindest teacher on campus.

The thought of food makes Ymir's stomach lurch and she shakes her head. "The school food is garbage, no offense."

"None taken," He says all too easily and he runs a thumb over his own eyebrow before continuing, "Is there a problem?"

Ymir knows that her teacher was well aware of what got her suspended. She also knows that Mr. Smith wasn't stupid. He used to be in the military after all.

Former Commander Erwin Smith, who still wore his Medal of Honor proudly despite putting his years of service behind him and commonly refused to talk about his experiences. He was very observant, a skill that got him further in life and a skill he's made clear to his class.

Despite it, even if Mr. Smith tries to warmly present himself as someone she could confide in, Ymir won't talk to him. If she wanted to talk, talking to a teacher would definitely be her last choice. Ymir grunts half-heartedly, "The world is the problem."

He nods as if he agrees and Ymir thinks he actually does. "Ah, good thing high school isn't the world, huh?"

"I guess so," Ymir shrugs and a part of her wants to say, It's not even high school. It's Historia, but she refrains. Because there's no way her history teacher would be the one she admits that sort of truth to.

"I think it would be better if you try hanging around somewhere that isn't the hallway," Mr. Smith suggests, looking over his shoulder as if someone was going to come before directing his intense eyes at Ymir. "Don't want the wrong teacher finding you and giving you detention."

"Right," Ymir says dryly and starts moving.

The taller man lifts a hand in a form of goodbye and calls gently despite his naturally booming voice, "Take care, Ymir. See you in 7th period."

Ymir skips 7th period.

The tension is still thick between Historia and Ymir but at least Ymir can stomach looking her directly in the eye now. Historia's been generous enough to spare Ymir a few words occasionally, usually concerning their assignment. She hasn't said anything past a conversation you would have with an acquaintance though and it still makes Ymir feel ill.
The week before finals has put every class into review and studying mode so every period was going over material they had learned throughout the year. Their teacher had finished her fifteen minutes of lecture and had given her students the rest of the period to work on their reviews.

Ymir was working a little absentmindedly. She remembers the answers more photographically than actually absorbing the information. She knew how to connect an answer to a question with keywords without actually learning from what she saw.
A buzz in her pocket draws Ymir's attention away and she can't help but glance at Historia who sat in front of her. The blond stares intently at her phone, not even giving the review her effort. Ymir presses her lips together and pulls her own device out. Turning on her phone, her lock screen was filled to the brim with social media notifications that she never bothered checking. Ever since she got her phone back, she's been avoiding those platforms as her isolation from her classmates would only worsen if she checked what they had been doing in her distance. Historia was the most active on social media, of course, so Ymir knew that Historia's face would probably be the first thing she saw if she even attempted to open up an app.

Speaking of Historia, Ymir had received a text from her through her number.

i want 2 talk 2 u after school

If Ymir had the nerve, she would have voiced her answer and asked Historia why she wasn't just talking to her directly. When Ymir tried to reach Historia's gaze though, Historia was purposefully avoiding Ymir's eyes.

Ymir frowns deeply.

She types back, Ok.

Ymir was willing to admit she was nervous. Her stomach was curling in on itself and her fingers almost felt numb from a painful tingling sensation at her fingertips. She inhales and exhales, feeling the tension in her shoulders and the hollowness in her chest. She feigns a scowl despite her position in a rather excluded area.

This was where Ymir and Historia often went when they skipped class or just wanted to avoid their friends. Ymir had been avoiding this area since her return from her suspension for reasons that didn't have to be explained.

She hates the feel here.

She hates the way her heart warms up at the briefest thoughts of their shared private moments together. She hates the way her throat tightens up and a wave of guilt and longing rushes over her.

She closes her eyes, leaning her head against the brick wall. It was in a corner, near the courtyard under the shade of a large old oak tree. She can hear the chatter of the student body from a short distance and she feels as if she could dissolve in it. Lose herself and disappear.

If only she could disappear.

"Are you sleeping?" Historia's voice slices through the temporary quietness of Ymir's head.

Immediately, as she roused from her unexpected doze, her usual thoughts flood and her head is suddenly loud again. Ymir can't help but curl her lips bitterly despite the regret and she sends a sharp look at Historia, "You told me you wanted to talk then took your time."

"Well, unless you wanted someone to join us in this conservation, I had to wait until the attention was off me," Historia replies, something in her tone akin to annoyance. She's wearing her cheerleading uniform and judging from the fresh scent of body wash coming off of Historia, she was just released from practice not so long ago.

"That must have been difficult," Ymir says in mock sympathy. She rubs her eyes for a moment, feeling a dull ache starting to form.

Historia admits nonchalantly, "It's a lot harder to avoid people when you're not looming over me."

Ymir huffs and she wishes her chest didn't feel light as it did when Historia said that. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Are you mad at me for kissing Reiner?"

It catches Ymir off guard and the surprise is evident in her features. Ymir can't help but blink a few times before her expression hardens and she counters defensively, "Are you mad at me for beating up Yaeger?"

"Why would I be mad?"

Even though it was supposed to be a question to brush off the topic, Ymir knew Historia was frustrated with what she did. Historia had made an effort to relieve Eren of the harassment that he originally received because of Historia. She was always rather aggravated when she saw or heard about another kid picking on the boy.

Ymir still wanted to understand what made Historia feel that way towards Eren. She wanted to know why it was Eren that caught Historia's interest and not Ymir. Ymir just wanted Historia to look at her the same way she looked at Eren.

Ymir states, "You're pissed at me."

"So are you," Historia's ocean eyes turn into ice and she looks at Ymir the way Ymir doesn't want to be looked at.

"When did you and Reiner become a thing?"

"We're not a "thing" and why does it matter if we were?"

"Because!"

"Because what, Ymir?!" Historia snaps and her normally passive expression shifts into irritation. "You're not one to decide who I date. I don't need your approval, you're not my big sister or mother or whatever part you're trying to play in my life. Stop acting like I'm the one who needs to apologize to you for kissing a goddamn boy!"

"It's not that!" Ymir hates the way she almost sounds like she is going to cry. She clenches her jaw, her fingers curling into a fist. "I don't want you to apologize for anything! I don't care who you date!" Yes, you do. "I just want to know why? Why didn't you tell me anything about you two? Why are you so concerned about a boy that you don't even talk to?!"

"Ymir, you beat the shit out of him for no fucking reason!"

"There was a reason! Jesus Christ, you think I would actually beat someone up for nothing?!" Ymir breathes out exasperatedly. She runs a hand through her hair and snarls, "I'm not that type of person, Historia."

"Well, it sure seems like it," Historia's tone is laced with disappointment and bitterness.

Ymir's chest starts to burn and she tries to fight back a crestfallen expression. She winces and furrows her eyebrows, trying to keep her infuriated look. She would rather look angry than dejected.

She's never shown the more vulnerable side of her to Historia despite how much she wished she could drop the act in front of her. But she knows how pathetic that side was. How vulnerable. She didn't want Historia to see her as some pitiful fool even if Ymir was one.

"I don't understand you anymore, Ymir," Historia's voice shakes momentarily and it makes Ymir's heart break.

It reminds Ymir of how much of a fuck up she was. She hates that she was doing this to the girl she loved. The girl who gave her a chance. The girl who chose her over everything and everyone.

There's heat building behind her eyes and Ymir's trying not to let Historia see her cry. She grits her teeth and growls, "You never have."

Then she leaves.

Away from their spot, from their school, from their town, from their classmates, from Historia.

Ymir never realized how much she hated herself in Historia's presence until the distance was put between them.

She loathes everything about that fact.