Chapter Seven
Ranger smiled as I came into view. That damned smile. It gets me every time, maybe because it's so rare.
I stepped back, issuing a wordless invitation. He stepped over the threshold, murmuring a quiet "Babe" as he passed me. I closed the door and returned to the living room, where I had been relaxing on the couch, watching Back to the Future. He came and sat next to me, looking uncharacteristically unsure of himself. For once, I wasn't rushing to fill the silence.
"How've you been, Babe?"
"I'm okay. How are you, Ranger?"
"A little confused," he admitted.
"What are you confused about?"
"You. It feels like you're mad at me."
"I'm not mad anymore."
"Are you avoiding me?"
I shrugged. "Maybe a little."
"Why?"
I shrugged again. "I'm a little confused, too."
"Is it something I can help clear up?"
"Probably. But I don't know if I'm ready to have the conversation with you yet."
His expression changed, and if I weren't so attuned to his every micro-expression, I probably wouldn't have catalogued the difference. I was so nervous about having this conversation with him. I was so terrified he'd reject me and stop being my friend. His was the opinion I respected above all others. His approval meant more to me than anyone else's. It was one thing to never go further with a romantic relationship, but losing his friendship was something I couldn't even fathom without wanting to cry.
He took my hand in his. "Babe, whatever it is, you can talk to me. We're friends, right?"
I looked at him. "Right."
"Are you…sick?" he asked.
I smiled tremulously. "No, I'm not sick."
"Then what is it, Babe? Whatever it is, it can't be that bad."
I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "Why don't I tell you about my vacation and what I was doing? Before I get into it, do you want a drink?"
"Sure, Babe."
I stood up and retrieved two bottles of water from the fridge. I came back, handed one to him and sat down again. "Before I left, I had started thinking about my life and what I wanted from it." I started picking at the bottle's label. "That's why I quit Vinnie's and talked to Tank about working at Rangeman."
Ranger took my hand again, tugging it gently away from the bottle. "I'm proud of you, babe."
I smiled. "Thanks. So anyway, I decided to go on a vacation. I had some money saved up, and my grandma gave me some money for my birthday. I wanted some time alone to figure out some things, and I didn't think I could do that here, with my mom, Morelli, and everyone else always coming at me. I felt like I couldn't get any peace here. I saw an ad in one of Lula's magazines for The Bahamas, and I did some googling and found a pink sand beach there. It looked so beautiful and peaceful that I had booked my flight and hotel before I knew it."
"I'm so sorry I changed your hotel without asking you, Babe. I just wanted to do something nice for you." He kissed my hand.
"Relax. That's not where I'm going with all this. Anyway, as I was saying, I wanted to think about my life. For example, I thought about what Joe and I were doing and where our relationship was going. I thought about my relationship with my mom and all the gossip about me in the 'Burg, which further deteriorated my relationship with her. I thought about maybe going back to school, too."
"You want to go back to school, Babe?"
I shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe. I decided to end it with Joe. If we weren't on the same page after three years of doing that on-and-off thing, we would never be. I don't want to have kids. I don't believe I'll ever want them. And he does. He wants the traditional home with a stay-at-home mom who has dinner for him at six o'clock, and I burn everything I try to cook. And I don't care. So, yesterday morning, I broke up with him. He started a fight about it, but Ranger, you should have seen me! I stuck to my guns and tried to remain calm, but it was hard. I may have yelled a little. But we're over, and I told him not to call or come over anymore."
I took a deep breath and a sip of water. Ranger was smiling at me, willing me to continue. "Then, I went to my parents' house and confronted my mom. She started yelling at me about Joe, telling me it was my last chance to be just like her, in so many words, and I told her if she couldn't support my decisions, then I didn't have to come over anymore. I told her she could think about that for a few days, and then I just left."
Ranger leaned forward and enveloped me in his arms. "I'm so proud of you, babe," he whispered. I hugged him back. I couldn't help it; he felt so good. He smelled familiar and comforting, and I felt my libido wake up and take notice.
I leaned back and released him. "I'm sure you know by now I asked Tank to come with me to view an apartment I found, and I signed a lease. I will move in at the beginning of November, and I agreed on a security plan with Tank, too."
He nodded. "He told me."
"I'm going to buy some new furniture, too." I gestured around me vaguely. "This stuff is ugly, and I just got it cheaply at the thrift stores because all my stuff kept getting destroyed by firebombs. I hope when I move and don't work for Vinnie anymore, I won't have people randomly showing up and leaving bodies sawn in half on my couch or tossing Molotov cocktails through my living room window."
"So was that it, Babe? That's what you decided on your vacation?"
I looked at him for a long moment, studying his face. He loves me, I thought. He doesn't do relationships, though. I frustrate him. He couldn't survive if something happened to me. All these thoughts and more kept swirling in my head. Do I dare do this now? Or do I go through the training at Rangeman and prove that I can learn from my mistakes? That I can take care of myself so he doesn't have to worry so much? As I gazed into his eyes, I knew with absolute certainty that he would not be receptive to changing the status quo. At least not right now. If ever there was a time I'd wish for telepathy, this was it!
I swallowed thickly. "Yes, Ranger. That's all. I decided to work at Rangeman and get serious about the training before I left. It's time for new beginnings." I leaned forward and kissed him gently. "Thank you."
He left soon after that. No more was said, but I felt like we had healed our friendship. And that was worth everything to me.
After he left, I quickly showered, brushed my teeth and put on my oldest, most comfy pair of pyjamas. I crawled into bed, and the darkness took over.
I didn't see anyone for the rest of the week. I was packing and cleaning the apartment so I wouldn't have to return after moving my stuff. On Friday night, I went to bed early after verifying with the guys that'd be here in the morning to help me.
Before the morning light dawned, I realized I wasn't alone in bed. Full awareness came slowly, though. I opened an eye to see a set of warm brown ones looking at me with a touch of amusement in them.
"Diesel! What are you doing in my bed?" I hissed. I scrambled to stand, glaring at him. "We've had this conversation before."
"Sorry, Sweet Cheeks. You looked too cute to resist," he said impishly.
"What are you doing here? I've seen you more this month than in the past year."
"Just checking in on you. There's a lot of upheaval in the air around you."
I frowned. "All the changes I'm making are good ones, though. Right?"
Diesel nodded thoughtfully. "I think so. But I was wondering what's going on with the Bounty Hunter."
"That's none of your business. I am not even happy you know about it."
"Well, you can't stop me there," he admitted. "But I keep your secrets."
"Are you clairvoyant, too?" I asked, a thought occurring to me.
"No."
"Damn."
"Sweet Cakes. Follow your heart. You'll never regret chasing your dreams."
I smiled. "Thanks, Diesel. Now, get out of my bed."
He chuckled. "Are you sure there isn't any room for me? It's a big bed for such a tiny woman," he teased.
"One. I'm not a tiny woman. Two, there's no room for you. You gotta go, but thank you."
He got out of my bed and loped over to me. "You're no fun," he said, tweaking my nose. "I'll see you later."
The next thing I knew, it was morning. The weak, early morning, wintery sunshine was streaming through my windows, and I was blessedly alone in my bed.
Today was Moving Day! I bounded out of bed, hurried through my morning shower, tossed my hair into a ponytail and dressed quickly. I made some coffee, then cleaned out the pot. I put the coffeemaker in a box and looked around. I was ready. The guys should be here in about half an hour, and then we could move my stuff to my new place. Ranger was bringing his tricked-out Ford F150 to haul some furniture pieces to the dump, like my mattress and couch. No one would want either, and I couldn't in good conscience drop them off at a thrift store. My new furniture was being delivered to my new apartment later today, and I wanted to get everything unpacked and set up before starting my new job at Rangeman on Monday.
While waiting for the guys, I sat on the counter in my kitchen and started thinking. My mom didn't call me this week to invite me to dinner last night, so I guess she had made her choice. It hurt, thinking she didn't care enough about me to support me if I didn't live my life the way she wanted me to, but I guess it was better to know this now than to go to dinner and be ambushed with Joe's presence.
Before I got too far into my melancholy thoughts, the guys arrived. Ranger led the group, letting himself in and smiling widely when he saw me sitting on the kitchen counter. "Hey, Babe," he greeted. "Ready to blow this pop stand?"
"Hey, guys!" I said to the group at large. "I'm so ready to get out of here."
A chorus of greetings came from Tank, Hal, Cal, and Lester. "Good morning, Steph." "Hey, Steph." "We brought you a coffee and a Boston Crème doughnut." "Morning, Beautiful."
I accepted the coffee and doughnut from Cal, kissing his forehead tattoo in thanks.
"Babe, just tell us what you want us to do, then we'll do it. The move will go more quickly that way."
"Okay." I pointed at the long wall in the living room. "So, over here, I have all the boxes and things going to the new apartment." I turned and gestured to a smaller area where a few small furniture pieces were standing, and several garbage bags were haphazardly piled. "That stuff is going to the dumpster. And Ranger, the couch, the mattress, and the box spring are going into your truck to take to the dump. They're too big for the dumpster, and Dillon would not appreciate it if I just left them outside. They're not in good enough shape to donate or give away, plus I think used mattresses are just a bit too…icky to give to someone else."
With military precision, the move was on. The men had all my stuff out of the apartment within thirty minutes and three trucks loaded. Ranger took Cal with him in his truck, and they were going to the dump, and then they'd meet the rest of us at my new place. I stopped by Dillon's apartment on the first floor and gave him my keys and a six-pack of beer I'd saved for him.
"Thanks for all your help over the years, Dillon. You're a great super."
"It's been my pleasure, Steph. I'll let you know if I get a new renter sooner to save you some cash."
With a final thank you, I waved goodbye and got into my car. I drove out of the parking lot, and the two large SUVs from Rangeman followed me closely. I said a mental goodbye to my old, depressing apartment and looked ahead to my future.
By the time Ranger and Cal arrived at my new apartment, we had finished moving my belongings inside. I had thought to label the boxes with the name of the room they belonged in, so it went pretty fast and efficiently, not that I'd expect anything less with these men. I thanked them all profusely and wanted to show them how much I appreciated their help.
"Will you all join me at Shorty's to eat copious amounts of pizza that will add hours to your workout routines and drink enough beer that you'll need the Cure tomorrow?" I said, laughing.
Tank let out one of his booming laughs. "Bring it on, Little Girl." And with that, we all drove over to Shorty's. Ranger offered to drive me, so I went with him in his truck, and the rest of the men went in their SUVs.
As soon as I was buckled into the high seat of Ranger's truck, he navigated out of my parking lot and started driving toward the little dive called Shorty's. It was a dark hole in the wall, but even I could admit their pizza was the best in Trenton, though I still gave the honour of best meatball sub to Pino's. Ranger didn't say much on the drive over, but he did take my hand and hold it together with his on his thigh. I wondered at that; he wasn't typically comfortable with casual affection. I didn't expend too much mental energy pondering the move, though. He loved me, and I love him, and for now, this would be enough.
We had a great time at Shorty's. The men were all in good moods, even Ranger. Lester's antics at the table kept everyone laughing, and it had been a long time since I felt this relaxed in Ranger's presence. Even though there were only six of us, we ate five large pizzas, and I lost count after six pitchers of beer. Ranger had one slice of pizza and one glass of beer before switching to his customary salad and water. Tank called Woody, Binkie and Vince to pick them up and drive the SUVs back to Rangeman. I stopped by the cashier's stand and paid the bill on a detour back to the table from the bathroom. I knew Ranger would probably try to pay it if they brought the bill to the table, and since the guys were helping me, I wanted to treat my friends. The furniture store called and said their driver should arrive in about an hour, so the party started breaking up. I was feeling pretty good and a little tipsy by this time, so when the designated drivers showed up, Ranger escorted me back to his truck and drove me home while the rest of the guys poured themselves into the SUVs. I waved goodbye as we exited the parking lot and turned toward Ranger with a contented sigh.
"Thanks, Batman."
He looked at me with amusement and squeezed my hand. When we returned to my apartment, Ranger gently shook me awake—I must've fallen asleep—and led me inside. As I tried to get the key in the lock, my cell phone buzzed again. The delivery van had arrived a little early. Ranger jogged back downstairs and let them in, and then they moved all my new furniture inside, setting it down where Ranger directed. When it was all unloaded, I tipped them forty bucks, and they left with a smile and a thank you.
I closed the door behind them and leaned against it for a moment. I was sober now and more than a little daunted by everything I had to do before I went to bed tomorrow night. I wanted to be completely set up and unpacked before my first day at Rangeman. I'd probably be exhausted every night, and I didn't want to have to come home and do even more work.
"Do you want some help, Babe?"
"You don't need to get back to Rangeman?"
"It's Saturday afternoon. I don't need to be there."
"If you're offering to help, I'm not going to turn you down," I admitted. "I'm a little overwhelmed by how much needs to be done."
Together, we assembled and moved my new furniture. We started in the bedroom with the new king-sized bed. The nightstands and dresser just needed to be moved into position. In the living room, we moved the couch into where I wanted, then assembled the coffee table and end tables. I had also splurged on a new television and brought it home to my old apartment, but I didn't bother to take it out of the box until now. Ranger helped me set it up on the new stand and hooked up the Blu-Ray player. I still had to call and arrange cable and Internet services, but at least I could watch movies.
A couple of hours later, all my new furniture was assembled and in place. I also bought a bookshelf, a new dining table and chair set, barstools for my kitchen's breakfast bar, and a new chair for the corner of my bedroom. I didn't reveal the reason for getting that chair to Ranger, but it was for him. Though we had never discussed it, I knew he spent time there watching me sleep occasionally. I wasn't sure why he did it, but it sometimes coincided with times he'd have to leave town. He sat in it after I angled it in the corner, and I saw something I didn't recognize in his expression.
He said goodbye after that and kissed me gently before he left.
The following day, I spent most of my time unpacking boxes and putting everything away in their new homes. I took a quick noon break to grab a meatball sub from Pino's, but I didn't stay to eat there. I didn't particularly want to run into Joe, and since we both loved that particular 'Burg institution, it would be bound to happen sooner or later. My vote is on later.
I was finally done unpacking just before dinner, and as I looked around at my new home, I smiled happily. It was much nicer than the St. James apartment, though I'd probably always look back at that place with fond memories. It was where I had regained my independence after my horrible marriage and subsequent divorce to Dickie, not to mention the site of my first encounter with Ranger. Remembering that, though, led my mind down the rabbit hole to awful memories, like finding the sawn-in-half body on my couch and Ranger getting shot. I shook my head to clear my thoughts, determined to live in the present.
