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Present time...

Rachel pulled her sleeves back up, brushing away the stray tear that had escaped. She couldn't bear to look at Eddie now that she'd shown him what she'd done all those months ago, now that he knew why she'd had two months off work.

Eddie was in shock; his heart was pounding with pain. He was sat next to a broken woman. She'd been in emotional pain all this time, and he'd had no idea, because she'd hidden it from him so well. She was broken because of him. He'd caused this by initiating something with Melissa, when he knew Rachel loved him and had feelings for him. If he'd had just been patient, none of this would have happened.

"Tell me what happened, Rach. Please?" he begged

Rachel sniffled, shifting uncomfortably on the sofa. She had to tell him now, there was no going back. He had a right to know.

"I was... pregnant, Eddie, when we split up. I'd known for two weeks. I was planning to surprise you when we went on holiday. And then, Melissa came back, and... Well, we broke up. I couldn't make you choose between her baby and ours, so I didn't tell you. You were looking for a new job, and I thought I'd never have to see you again. I was ok being a single Mum"

Eddie sighed painfully. A baby. Of course she'd been pregnant. He'd had his suspicions before they'd split up. In the weeks leading up to the break up, she'd been ill on and off. Nausea, vomiting, dizziness and headaches. Despite her telling him she was fine, he had wondered if there was more to it. But nothing had come of it, so he'd put it to the back of his mind, the thought fading completely when Melissa turned up.

"It turned out I didn't need to tell you anyway. A week after we split up, I... miscarried"

Eddie stared at her; he hadn't been expecting her to say that at all. It was obvious that she wasn't pregnant anymore, but, for some reason, a miscarriage hadn't even crossed his mind.

"I couldn't deal with it, I just- I'd just lost you and... that baby was the only thing keeping me going. Knowing I was pregnant was giving me hope that I would find happiness, even if it wasn't with you. So when I saw the blood, it sent me spiralling. I just gave up; I didn't see the point anymore. It felt like everyone and everything was against me. I was so tired, Eddie. Tired of being in pain, of dealing with heartbreak after heartbreak. I just wanted it all to stop. So I tried to make it stop. I thought it was going to work, until Philip found me in the bathroom and called an ambulance. I woke up four weeks later, in the hospital"

A tear rolled down Eddie's cheek as he listened. She'd gone through all of this on her own, because of him. He hadn't been there for her when she'd needed him the most. That made him feel so guilty. He'd been so wrapped up in the drama with Melissa; he'd pushed Rachel to one side. He thought she was strong and would get through this, but everyone had something that had the power to break them. Rachel had lost their baby and he hadn't been by her side to comfort her. What kind of person did that make him?

Rachel could feel him thinking, processing her words carefully. She hated the silence that filled the room, it was overwhelming. She couldn't bear not knowing what he was thinking. He probably thought she was selfish, a coward for trying to take the easy way out. He probably thought she didn't care about him, or the consequences of her actions. He was probably wondering why Philip hadn't called him to tell him what happened.

"Before you ask, Philip didn't contact you because I made him swear not to. It was selfish, I know, he's only a kid" she mumbled quickly

Eddie sighed. Philip hadn't even crossed his mind until she'd just said that. He dreaded to think how he was coping with all of this. He'd found her on the bathroom floor, bleeding out. He'd saved her life by calling the ambulance. He'd been through so much emotional trauma, and he hadn't been able to talk to anyone about it. That was a lot for a 16 year old to deal with. It explained why, when Eddie had bumped into him in the corridor a few times in the past, that he'd acted shifty and hadn't wanted to talk to him. It hadn't been because of Melissa, like he'd thought. It was because of Rachel.

One thing was for sure, nothing that Rachel had done was selfish. None of it. She was in unbearable pain, and she'd wanted it to end. And he hadn't been there for her when she'd needed him the most. He'd made a lot of mistakes recently that he needed to put right.

"I'm sorry, Rach" he whispered

"It wasn't your fault" she sighed

"It was, I should have taken a second to think rationally when Melissa came back. Melissa was lying about the baby, I should have realised that before jumping to conclusions and pushing you away!" he argued

"Eddie, you didn't know she was lying, I didn't either! We both did what we thought was right. You had to do what was best for that baby. I couldn't let you lose another child, it would have killed you"

"But losing me and our baby nearly killed you" he pointed out

"It doesn't matter about me, Eddie" she sighed

Eddie stared at her, taken aback by her words. There was no emotion in her tone, she genuinely meant it.

"How can you say that, Rach? You matter, Rach, you matter to me, you matter to Philip! The kids here love you, I love you!"

Her eyes glazed over with tears as she shook her head. She didn't believe him.

Eddie didn't know what else he could say. One thing he did know was that Rachel was still in pain, and she needed him. He could see in her eyes that she was defeated, she'd hit rock bottom and couldn't get back up to the surface. Now was the time to step up and be there for her, something he should have done months ago.

"What can I say to make you believe me? What can I do, Rach?" he asked

"Nothing. You can't do anything. I lost myself the day I lost you, Eddie. Nothing can fix me" she whispered tearfully

"Rach," he started, sighing shakily

"It just feels like everyone has forgotten I exist. Everyone is better off without me. You, our baby, Philip, Melissa. I just... can't do this anymore, Eddie. I want it all to stop" she whimpered

Eddie pulled her into his arms as she sobbed loudly. Her guttural cries threatened to break his heart. He hated seeing her like this. She needed help, more help than he could offer her. She was hurting and there was nothing he could do. But one thing was for sure, he'd almost lost her six months ago, and it felt like, if he didn't intervene or do something now, he would lose her for real this time.

"Rach, look at me" he instructed gently

She sat up, the heartbroken expression on her face making him want to cry.

"You're the strongest woman I know, Rach. I'm sorry I haven't been here for you, I really, really am. I hate the fact that you've gone through all of this on your own, that you've suffered in silence. I love you, and I'm here now..."

He cleared his throat

"...Don't freak out, but, I think we need to get you some professional help. These thoughts you're having, they're scaring me, and I know they're scaring you too. I can't make them go away, and you can't either, not on our own, but with some help, we can. I know the thought of getting help is scary, but you've taken the first step by telling me how you're feeling. Telling a Doctor, and then a therapist, is the next step, and we'll do it together, ok? I'm not promising things will immediately feel better, but it's a start, right?"

She nodded, exhaling shakily

Eddie held out his arms for her, sighing in relief as she sank into them. She was trembling in his arms still.

"I'm here for you, Rach, whatever you need. As a friend or... whatever you want us to be. I'm here; I'm not leaving you again"

"I love you" she whispered

"I love you too" he replied, kissing her forehead softly

"I'm going to call the Doctors and make you an appointment, and then I'm going to drive you home, ok?" he told her

She nodded quietly, watching him stand up and head over to the office phone.

Within a few minutes, he'd made Rachel an appointment for the following day. It wasn't ideal, Rachel needed help now, but it was a start. He'd been given a list of numbers to call if he thought Rachel was at imminent risk, which he didn't think she was, but he was going to keep an eye on her.

Once he'd finished on the phone, he helped Rachel to pack up her things and they headed out into the car park.

The drive home was a quiet one. Rachel was tired, emotionally drained. Eddie knew there was no quick fix for how she felt or what she was going through. It was going to take time, patience and love.

Once they got to the house, Eddie sat in the bedroom whilst she got changed into a pair of pyjamas in the ensuite. She then climbed into bed, resting her head against the pillows. Eddie had offered to make her something to eat, which she had politely declined.

Eddie had just turned to leave the room, when Rachel called him back. He turned around.

"Will you stay with me, please? I- I... don't want to be on my own right now" she requested

Eddie nodded, sitting on the bed beside her. He smiled as she grabbed his hand, pulling his arm over her shoulder as she moved closer to him. She laid her head on his chest, staring up at him lovingly.

"Eddie?"

"Yeah?" he answered

"Thank you for being here for me"

He kissed her forehead gently, stroking her arm with his thumb.

"Whatever you need, Rach. We'll get through this together, ok?" he promised her

She nodded. She did somewhat believe him.

She couldn't lie; she was worried what the future would hold. Getting professional help frightened her, but it was a step forward in the right direction. She wanted to get better. She had a long way to go, she knew that, and it wouldn't be easy. But having Eddie by her side supporting her, made her feel like she could do it.

The end.

A/N: Hope you all enjoyed. Leave a comment/review and let me know what you think :)