*Author's Note*
Thank you for all the follows, favs, and reviews.
He's Lost His Anchor
Shaw POV:
I felt melancholy as I went thru the mechanical motions of hitching my horse to the post and walking up the steps of my dad and uncle's porch. I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders as I curled my hand into a fist and knocked on the door of the Sullivan-Vance cabin. After a minute or so the door opened and Sully was standing in front of me. His eyes skirted over me and landed on the bag I had slung over my shoulder. "You get kicked out?" He asked, moving aside so that I could enter the cabin.
"No, I chose to leave so that Jessa and the kids can have a nice house to stay in since she wants a break." I told my dad while walking by him and into the front room of the cabin he shared with Uncle Jim.
"Well, stay as long as you want, but you'll have to take the sofa since the cabin's not that big." He told me, closing the door and following behind me.
"Thanks." I nodded, making my way over to the sofa in the main room.
Uncle Jim was sitting in his armchair, sipping on his flask and pettin' his dog. He gave me a tilted look before asking, "Ya get thrown out on your ass for drinkin', didn't ya boy?"
"Uh…" I muttered, taken aback that Jim had hit the nail on the head about my situation with Jessa, as I sat down on the sofa.
"Don't try an' bullshit me, Shaw. I see glimpses of Mary in Jessa and I can verify for a fact that she ain't puttin' up with your bullshit, which at the moment is your drinkin'." My uncle told me while my dad took his seat in the arm chair on the other side of the sofa.
"I don't drink that much." I scoffed, feeling annoyed that my old drunken mountain uncle was telling my I drank too much.
Uncle Jim's icy blue eyes cut right thru me as he boldly told me in his crochety timbre, "Boy, anytime I see ya anymore you've got a bottle danglin' from your hand. It ain't befittin' a family man, tell ya the truth."
"But you drink." I called him out, pointing at the flask he had clutched in his hand.
"I'm an old widower; can do what I want." Uncle Jim retorted, tippin' his flask back to further prove his point.
"Shaw, you need to get a handle on your drinking or else you're gonna lose Jessa for good." My dad told me with a strong sense of knowing in his profound timbre as he leaned over slightly in his chair, giving me a narrowed and firm look.
"Mhm," Uncle Jim nodded his head before pointin' his flask and me and advising in his loud crochety tone, "listen t'your pappy, boy, cause he knows what he's talkin' 'bout."
"Your both overreacting about my drinkin'." I remarked with an eye roll. Adjusting myself to lounge on the sofa, I scoffed, "Hell, you should be concerned that Jessa called it quits with me; tore up our family."
"You're actin' a damn fool." Uncle Jim bluntly scoffed at me. He shook his head at me too 'fore tippin' back his flask in a very hypocritical fashion.
"Shaw, son-" My dad began only for me to cut him off with the loud snap off, "Don't dad, just don't 'Shaw, son' me tonight. I ain't in the mood to listen to your lectures and sage advice."
"I'm going to my room." Sully announced while standing up from his chair. Looking at Uncle Jim while pointing to me, he said, "You deal with his sulkin' and drunkenness tonight." Shaking his head, my dead stormed off to his bedroom.
"Oh, son, ya sure did get 'im mad. Ooo-eee…" Uncle Jim cracked out in a low chuckle as the sound of my dad's door slamming shut echoed throughout the entire cabin.
"Reckon so, but what else is knew anymore." I half-shrugged, taking my flask from my pocket and uncorking it. "He's got no grounds to judge me considerin' all the whores he's had comin' and goin' from his shithole of a house the last few years." I told my uncle, tippin' back my flask and takin' a much-needed drink.
Giving me a stern look, my uncle bluntly told me, "Ya'll got some issues that need hammered out, boy."
I didn't say a word, but I knew he was right. I just didn't want to hammer out any issues I had tho cause that meant I had to confront my childhood, somethin' I never wanted to do.
Jessa POV:
The day after Shaw left, I felt crushed and went about my morning chores with a drag to my step and a slump to my shoulders. Honestly, I didn't want to end things with Shaw and create a split home for my children, but I felt that his excessive drinking left me no other choice. I couldn't raise my kids around a drunk, especially one that's in denial about having a problem.
Feeling melancholy, I decided to pay Allie a visit. I needed to talk to my best friend about everything, plus she did say that she'd help me in any way I needed if I decided to breakup with Shaw. What I needed right now was somebody to vent to; a shoulder to lean on.
It only took a few seconds for Allie to answer the door once I knocked on it. Looking at me and my kids, a friendly smile appeared on her face as she stepped aside to clear the doorway. "Come in; I'll put on some tea."
"I broke up with Shaw last night; he moved out." I blurted out as I walked into the house with Lydia on my hip and Silas holding onto my hand.
"Oh, can't say that I'm surprised cause, honestly, I'm not." Was Allie's reaction as she closed the door. "I knew eventually you'd get sick and tired of his drinking." She explained while I led my babies over to the area on the floor that Captain W. was sitting at, playing with some toys.
"His denial's so deep that it's a bit scary." I remarked while we made our way into the kitchen, leaving our children to play together on the floor.
"Of course, he doesn't think he's got a problem." Allie scoffed, rolling her eyes as she went to grab her kettle while I took a seat at the table. "He's too perfect to have a problem." She sarcastically added in while preparing the tea kettle. "Shaw was the same way with Olga you know. Drank constantly and made her think she was worthless."
"He's never made me feel worthless, but he did get disrespectful last night when our argument got heated." I honestly told my best friend as she made her way over to the stove, full teakettle in hand.
"What'd he do?" Allie asked, placing the kettle on the stove with a soft clank.
"Told me to shut up and stop worrying about his drinking." I told Allie as she turned her back to the stove and made her way over to the table.
She took a seat next to me while remarking in a slight chortle, "Oh, no wonder you broke up with him."
"Yea…" I trailed off in a half-sigh, feeling a bit numb about being disrespected. I was already angry last night, leaving me with nothing else to feel today.
"So, do you think you'd ever get back together with him?" Allie seriously asked me while a slight sliver of curiosity twinkled in her sapphire eyes.
"I don't know, Allie." I honestly sighed since I really didn't know what I'd do down the road where it concerns Shaw. He's a good man, but he's gone down the rabbit hole and that's something I can't ignore or handle. I mean I'm not an AA sponsor, I'm not cut out to deal with an alcoholic that doesn't even want to admit he's one in the first place.
"Oh, okay." A look of concern crossed over her face as she asked, "So, how're you going to support the kids?" Placing a supportive and friendly hand on mine, she added in, "If you need any help, I'm here for you."
"Shaw's going to give me money on payday to run the house and care for the kids with." I explained in order to ease my friend's mind. I didn't need her worrying about the welfare of me and my kids, we'd get by just fine.
"He's giving you child support?" Allie asked, her sapphire eyes wide with disbelief. "Wow, I never thought he'd do that." She honestly told me in an awed tone as she leaned back slightly in her chair.
"Yea, well, he is. He's even letting me stay in the house so I don't have to uproot the kids."
"What about Todd and Mary, did they go with him?" Allie asked, getting up to fetch the kettle since it just started to loudly whistle, indicating the tea was done.
"No, they were asleep when we broke up. I told them what happened this morning and they said they're staying with me." I answered Allie while she brought the kettle over to the table.
After placing the kettle on the table, Allie went to fetch some cups, sugar, and cream all while telling me, "That's good cause I think they're better off with you then with him considering he's a heavy drinker."
"I agree," I revealed in tight sigh before concluding my thought with, "he's too worried about his next bottle and can't raise them properly.", while my friend returned to the table with the things we needed for our mid-morning tea.
Allie POV:
I was thrilled to death with Jessa's breakup news. It's the best thing I've heard in a while. I wanted to break out in a song and dance, but I reframed from doing so out of respect for Jessa's feelings. I knew that she loved Shaw to some degree so she was a bit torn and upset about the breakup. Her breakup had a silver lining tho, it paved the way for Tolbert to take her to Oklahoma; get her as far away from the feud as he possibly could. Plus, with Tolbert out of the Tug River Valley Ellison'll survive next year's election day festivities since, after all, the deadly fight was provoked by the ornery hot-headed ginger.
I poured the tea and set our cups in front of us while asking innocently (well not actually innocently, but my bff didn't know that), "Do you think that maybe the grass wasn't greener on the other side; that you should've just stayed with Tolbert?"
Her indigo eyes turned into narrow slits as she asked in a slightly hard-bitten way, "Why're you asking me that?"
"No reason, I'm just wondering how you're doing with your second breakup within a handful of months." I smoothly replied, sipping on my tea. I hope she buys my response and doesn't suspect anything.
"I'm 18 ½ with two failed relationships and two children, how'd you think I'm feeling, Allie?" Jessa rhetorically barked in a level and slightly hard tone. "God, don't ask me things like that." She told me, staring in her cup as if she was trying to find some solace or answers in it.
Great, I just upset her more. Not good, no she seems offended. Nodding, I told her a bit gracelessly, "Okay…I'm sorry, I was just trying to get a grasp on how you're feeling."
"I'm feeling just peachy." Jessa sarcastically snipped at me, sipping on her tea. Setting her teacup down rather roughly with a loud clank, she scoffed, "Hell, I came over here to rant and forget about feeling melancholy, not to be reminded of all of my past mistakes when it comes to picking out men."
Placing my cup down, I gave my friend a lightly lined, but warm, smile while suggesting, "Then just tell me whatever you think'll clear your mind and make you feel better."
"I just don't understand how he can be so blind to his problems. How Shaw doesn't view his drinking as alcoholism." Jessa told me, starting a rant that would last nearly half an hour.
After Jessa left, I quickly made my way over to my brother's house in order to share the happy news about the breakup with Tolbert (who I know without a doubt'll be happier than pig in shit that Jessa called it quits with Shaw). When I pulled up to the shack (err cabin?...) I noticed that Nancy's wagon was parked by the stable, meaning the shrew was home. Oh crap, I didn't even think about how to deal with her yet. I mean I didn't want to socialize with her; I was only here to share some vital information with Tolbert.
I took a deep breath, climbed down my wagon, and scooped up my son before going over to the front porch with a mission in mind, Nancy be damned. Holding my son's hand with a tighter grip then necessary, I stood on the porch and quickly knocked on the door. When the door squeaked open, I was met with my sister-in-law standing in front of me. A sugary, but fake, smile spread over her face as she greeted me with, "Oh, sister, it's so good of ya t'come for a visit."
Sister, oh god gag me. I will never consider that shrew my 'sister' even tho she's married to my older brother. I put on a sweet, but polite smile (even tho it killed me to do so) before telling Nancy, "I'm afraid I'm just here to see Tolbert, not to have some tea with you."
"Well, then come in and talk to him." She told me, moving over slightly so that I could see Tolbert's form sitting at the table cutting up some root vegetables. What the hell, why's he prepping veggies for?
"I'd prefer to just talk out here on the porch since I don't got time to visit." I countered, not wanting to get trapped in a room with Nancy. I wasn't mentally prepared to play mind games with her today.
Looking over her shoulder, Nancy told her cousin with a slight edge in her fake sugary tone, "Tolbert, my sister-in-law's here to see you. She's refusing to come inside, wants ya out on the porch instead."
I noticed that Tolbert just nodded, setting his knife and half cut carrot on the table. Standing up, he ordered the shrew, "Don't touch anythin' Nance. Don't need ya messin' up my rabbit stew recipe." Tolbert had a rabbit stew recipe? Since when does he cook? Hmm, that's news to me.
"I ain't gonna touch nothin'." Nancy snapped back at her cousin (showing her true from), moving away from the door and into the room while the redhead made the short walk over to the door.
The redhead stepped onto the porch and shut the door behind him. "Ya don't particularly care for Nance, now do ya?" Tolbert asked me, folding his arms over his chest while giving me slight sideways look.
I was taken aback by Tolbert's observation. Oh my god, my dislike for Nancy wasn't that evident, was it? Oh no. Giving the shiner a bewildered look, I countered with, "She's my sister-in-law, why'd you say that for?"
"Jessa didn't like her an' acted just like ya do when 'round her." He explained with a matter of fact look painted on his face.
"Well, aren't you observant." Flew out of my mouth (in what might be taken as a sarcastic tone) before I could stop myself.
"I ain't as dumb as I look, Allie." Tolbert deadpanned with an edge to his velvet-like timbre while leaning against the doorframe. "So, what'cha wanna tell me that ya didn't say yesterday?" He asked in a way that made me feel like he wasn't in the mood to be talking to me. Good lord, how did Jessa ever deal with his mood swings?
"Jessa paid me a visit earlier; she broke up with Shaw last night and he moved out." I informed Tolbert in a very business-like tone. Smirking, I waited for my words and their meaning to hit Tolbert.
After a few moments a sense of revelation washed over him, causing him to say with a smirk, "Ah…that's good."
"Yes, it's very good." I agreed with the redhead. Before he could utter a word, I laid out the next part of the plan with the honest remark of, "Now we need to warm her up to the idea of you, plus you need to save up money in order to move to Oklahoma with."
Tolbert's brows knitted deeply as he asked, "Why, I thought the land give 'ways were free?"
"The land grabs are free, but you're going to need at least $300 in order to buy supplies for the journey." Yea, a covered wagon and everything else needed for the trip added up to a lot of money. Hell, the team of horses, harnesses, and wagon would be anywhere between $150-250, plus there was the cost of food and the land filing fee. At least that's what a cost breakdown sheet posted at the Founders Day festivities at school said back when I lived in modern times.
His stormy blues popped out of his head cartoon style as he lowly whistled, "Sam's Hill, that's a lot o'money t'get."
"I advise you to get back to work shinning instead of cookin' stew for your cousin."
"I'm cookin' the stew for myself, I'm sick o'Nance's cookin'." Tolbert retorted in a sarcastic chuckle. "Gonna take me months t'get that kinda money."
"Good since I reckon it'll take months to get Jessa to soften up to you considering she blames you for her miscarriage and all."
"Don't remind me o'that." The ginger order thru tightly gritted teeth. "Anythin' else I needa know or can I get back t'my stew?" He asked rather sarcastically with an edge to his smoothly accent tone.
"I get the feeling that if Shaw can get a handle on his drinking then Jessa might consider taking him back so you better make money and make it quick." I honestly told Tolbert, giving him a head's up that he had a limited amount of time to get everything in order to go west with.
"I'll have the money within 3-months." Tolbert assured me before adding in, "Just make sure she'll go t'Oklahoma."
"Don't worry, I'll convince her it's the best thing for her children." Tolbert gave me a puzzled look, causing me to expand on my remark with a quick explanation of, "She never does what she wants, only what's best when it comes to them."
Tolbert didn't say a word, just nodded his head at me. Without so much as a goodbye, the redhead moonshiner turned his back to me and went inside of the house to resume making his stew. Afraid that if I lingered too long that Nancy would pop out of the cabin, I quickly dragged my son downstairs and over to my wagon. Once at the wagon I loaded up my son, climbed on, and pulled away from my brother's with a sense of accomplishment since, after all, my plan to get Jessa away from Shaw and the feud for good was officially underway now.
Devil Anse POV:
"Now that Shaw's not with Jessa anymore he's lost his anchor; is sure to be actin' brashly when it comes to Tolbert and the McCoys." Ellison told me, takin' a seat next to me on a stump durin' the loggin' camp's lunch break.
"I know, lil brother." I nodded solemnly, takin' a bite out of the apple Levicy packed wit' my ham sandwich. "Jessa calmed him; balanced his scales and now he's gonna be just like Uncle Jim." I told my brother before talkin' another crunchin' bite of my apple.
Ellison took a large bite out of his sandwich before telling me, "Our family doesn't need another 'Uncle Jim' type family member." I couldn't agree more. I just silently noddin' while ettin' my apple. My brother shook his head and sighed, "It'll just plummet us into violence, cause too many problems that won't be easily fixed."
"What do ya want me to do, Ellison?" I rhetorically asked my lil brother after swallowin' my bite of apple. Ellison got ready to make a reply, which I didn't needa hear, so I shot him a hard look and firmly told him, "I can't demand that the girl takes him back. Hell, you heard Jim this mornin', Jessa called it off with Shaw cause he's gotten into a bad habit of overdrinkin' since his injury."
"An injury that was caused by Tolbert, the same man that Shaw hates and wants to see dead for the mere reason that they both have interest in Miss Jessa." Ellison pointed out, trying to prove his point that Shaw was going to be a lose cannon and go after the McCoys now that he was single, before taking a large bite out of his cheese sandwich
I tossed my apple core over my shoulder while explainin', "She's just the tip of the iceberg, lil brother. Them twos hated each other long 'fore she showed up."
"But now that she's not with Shaw he's free to go after Tolbert with deadly force. He has no one to answer too, but himself now." Ellison explained with concern heavy in his voice. Lookin' me dead in the eyes, he seriously said, "You need to think of a way to keep Shaw at bay cause his temper flarin'll only cause more violence an' bloodshed."
"I'll talk to Sully about the boy. I'm sure he'll keep him in line." I replied since that's all I very well could do.
"If not, Anse, then I'm sure you'll think of a way to do so. You're smart, brother, and won't let any harm befall ours." Ellison told me before standing up and heading in the direction that Lias was in, no doubt to talk to him 'bout the troubles Shaw an' Jessa where havin'; what the meant for us.
One thing I do know is that our family's shaken up now by Shaw's marital problems. I think everyone knows it too, but just ain't admittin' it. Ellison's right, I need to make sure that Sully talks some sense into his boy otherwise I'll have to get a handle on it 'fore that grenade goes off at the wrong moment, takin' our family down as causalities. Hmm, perhaps I can get my daughter-in-law Allie to give my an idea of Jessa's mindset or I could always go to the source an' just have a talk with Jessa about her problems with Shaw; see if anything can be done to prevent him from losing his mind and going after McCoys (well one in general) in a blind rage.
AN:
I hope you guys like the reactions to the breakup. I decided to only do characters' reactions that I thought would be vital to the storyline. FYI the entire Hatfield clan's thinking WTF when it comes to the Shaw/Jessa breakup news lol.
Do you think Shaw's going to get help or just push his problems under the rug? Can Tolbert win Jessa back or is that a lost cause?