He made it a point not to show up to third period. If he saw the man – or heard him – he turned abruptly and walked the other way. He did not want to see him.
"How long are you gonna keep this up?" demanded Sasuke.
"Until school's over," Naruto grumbled. "And I can move the fuck out."
They sat in Naruto's apartment, eating pizza and pretending that the man whose name became a taboo wasn't just a wall away.
He left him a bento, once, next to his door. Naruto kicked it back but otherwise left it untouched. He did not leave him food again.
"You're not moving in with me," Sasuke muttered. "I can barely stand your mopey ass."
"Who said anything about moving in with you, you grumpy fuck?" Naruto snapped.
"You were looking at me."
"Well, fuck you for sitting across from me."
"Boys," Sakura interrupted, rolling her eyes. "Either help me with my math homework or shut up."
Sasuke showed her the steps. "Where will you go?"
Naruto nodded toward a lone envelope on the kitchen counter, marked with Konoha's crest. "Didn't open it," he mumbled.
Sasuke stood up abruptly. He walked to the counter, picked up the letter, and tore open the envelope.
"Sasuke!" yelled Sakura. "That's private! You can't – "
"You got in, dipshit," Sasuke replied. "And you got a scholarship, too."
Naruto tried to swallow, but his mouth dried. "I… I got in?" he choked.
"That's great, Naruto!" Sakura exclaimed, hugging him. "We can be roommates! I already started looking at apartments nearby. It's gonna be awesome! We can – "
"Shh!" Naruto silenced her, covering her mouth. He frowned when Sakura blinked at him, surprised, and looked away when her expression melted into outright pity.
Sasuke sighed and took out his phone. He played some rock music, then shoved the phone right next to the wall. "He won't hear you if you do that," he muttered. "Let go of my girlfriend."
Naruto did. "Sorry," he mumbled. "I – "
But he did not know what he wanted to say, so he clenched his fists and said nothing.
"Guess I'm glad I got in," he babbled instead. "I'm a good roommate," he added suddenly. "Um. I do the dishes."
Sakura cradled his head against her neck. "I know," she said quietly. "We'll have lots of fun, you and me." She grinned. "We might even invite Sasuke when he comes to visit." She mock-glared at her boyfriend. "You had to go to a different Uni, didn't you? You traitor. I hope your school loses to ours in every game."
Sasuke cocked a brow. "Didn't know you cared about sports that much, Haruno."
"Didn't know you didn't, Uchiha."
Naruto rolled his eyes. "Almost miss the days you two weren't talking to each other."
"And I miss the days you and Sensei did," Sakura clapped back. "Oh, um, sorry."
Naruto flinched and freed himself from her hug. "I don't give a fuck about him," he snapped.
Sakura's eyes filled with understanding. She brushed his hair. "Yes, you do," she sighed gently. "You are not yourself, and his eye hurts all the time. We know – "
"What?" Naruto gulped, his eyes shifting. "Why would his eye – " And he clamped his mouth shut. He just said he did not care and –
"It's your bond," Sasuke muttered quietly. "You can feel when the other is hurting physically. And, well, emotionally," he blurted, discomfited. "Apparently."
Naruto's breath quickened. "Then, why…." He clenched his jaw and tried to keep his emotions in check. "Can't feel him," he blurted, his voice hollow. "So he doesn't give a – "
"You need to reach out," Sasuke cut him off. "With your mind." He shifted, looking even more uncomfortable than before. "He'd probably block you, though."
Sakura glanced up at him. "So… so that means, Sensei is reaching out…?"
Naruto's heart drummed faster and faster. He stared at Sakura's math problem and tried to slow down his breaths.
Sasuke swallowed. "Maybe." He shrugged. "Most likely, your emotions are just…" he waved his hand absentmindedly, "overflowing your connection."
Naruto's cheeks burned red. "You're saying I'm emotional?!" he thundered, looking up.
Sasuke gave him a knowing look. "You're the most dramatic person I know," he stated. "And I'm dating Sakura."
"Hey!" the girl cried, punching the table.
"Case in point."
Sakura rolled her eyes and hmphed. "Anyways, we should celebrate your acceptance, Naruto," she said, changing the topic. "I'll bake you a cake!"
"You didn't bake me anything."
"You were accepted to a rival Uni. Traitor."
"That's just childish."
"Oh, I'm the childish one? Who was it that got upset he didn't get a cake when he doesn't even like sweets?"
Naruto got up and took his letter from Sasuke's hands. He read the words over and over again.
All this time, all he wanted was a way out.
He finally got one. Just when he didn't want to leave anymore.
Naruto glared at the wall. He could almost feel someone on the other side, gazing back.
"There's a test today," Sasuke said as the bell rang. "You need to show up."
Naruto glared ahead. "Does it matter?" he muttered. "Got in."
"Can still be kicked out," Sasuke replied. He scoffed. "You're an idiot. What's the point of avoiding the person you're bonded to?"
The words felt like a punch. "Can I undo it?" he croaked.
"You can die," Sasuke snapped. He got up. "Don't be late."
Naruto lay down on the grass in defiance. The wind felt nice, and the heat made him sleepy. He closed his eyes and tried to nap.
His heart beat painfully against his ribcage.
Fuck it. Naruto scoffed, got up, and walked to class. He didn't care, and he wasn't a coward. He'd face him, complete his shitty test, and be done with it.
He repeated those words to himself, trying to cheer himself up – or wall himself in – and opened the door.
Everyone stopped trying to solve their test and looked up.
Naruto's heart drummed faster.
They already started. So he must have been really late, and –
His eyes, quite on their own, flickered toward the man, sitting in his chair and reading his book and –
Naruto's breath escaped his lungs. He looked so… normal. Like nothing happened. Like he did not hide a burning red eye under his flimsy eye patch. Like he was just an ordinary man who could not transform into a giant wolf. Like –
The man raised his hand and snapped his finger, pointing toward an empty chair.
His chair; right between Sakura and Sasuke. In the first row. Right across from –
Naruto's temper flared.
He marched in, dropped his bag on said chair, and started dragging it away.
"Naruto," hissed Sakura, "what the hell are you doing?!"
Naruto didn't answer. He did not trust his voice.
The rest of the students looked up, baffled or annoyed, but kept their silence. He dragged the chair, the screech of its legs scrapping the floor echoing within the small classroom, all the way to the back.
"So rude," muttered Ino. "Some of us non-math-geniuses are trying to take a test, Naruto."
Naruto sat down and glared out the window and didn't answer.
His heart beat so fast it hurt.
A test materialized in front of him, accompanied by a pencil and a small piece of chocolate wrapped in colorful plastic. The hand that held the offerings placed them on the desk slowly, lingering just for a moment, as if hesitating.
"Good luck."
"Fuck you."
Someone gasped – it might have been Ino; he didn't care enough to look up – but the man simply walked away.
His voice was smooth and quiet again, and Naruto's vision immediately blurred. He clenched his fist, scoffed at nothing – or perhaps himself – and focused on the test.
He did not touch the candy.
He solved the test, taking care to show his work to the point of absurdism. He did not want to give the man any excuse to summon him again for a talk or a retest.
Someone got up and turned in their exam. Sasuke.
Naruto looked up, still crouching behind his hand, and saw Sasuke mutter something – what it was, he could not hear – but the teen's ears flushed red as he offered his hand to the man, looking oddly self-conscious.
The man blinked, surprised, and shook his hand. He offered him a gentle wisp of a smile and muttered something in response.
Sasuke nodded, grabbed his bag, and walked out.
Naruto glared down at his paper.
Damn that man for having a pretty smile. Damn him – Naruto threaded his fingers through his hair and pulled. Fuck.
The last time he saw him, he stood, seconds from falling, his blood staining his ill-fitting hoodie, and tried to earn his forgiveness. He looked like he was in so much pain – Naruto told himself it must have been his many wounds – and so pale.
He looked like the only thing keeping him up was the power of his will, and even that failed him.
And then he fell. He hit the floor hard, drowning in his own blood, and Naruto felt his heart ripping through his chest.
He didn't think.
He ran to the kitchen, grabbed the first knife he found, and ran back. He picked the man up and pulled him into his lap, holding him close – and shuddered because he was so used to him being so warm – the man was cold and lifeless, so pale he might have been a ghost, and Naruto hated himself for trying to be so fucking proud.
His hands were healed the moment he touched him, his blood, so he cradled his head against his neck, grabbed the knife, and kissed him as he sank the blade into his skin and sliced.
The sensation was intense and terrifying. His body knew it wasn't something he was supposed to do, but Naruto – hand shivering from pain and fear and goddamn it wake up – plastered his wound against the man's lips, hoping his blood was doing what it was supposed to do, what Sasuke said it could do…
The man's lips were cold against his; cold and soft and unresponsive.
Naruto brushed away his hair and kissed his forehead instead. His tears darkened the silver strands, cleaning them from blood… and then the man's chest began to glow gold. His wounds shone as they closed – and he was wounded everywhere, covered in scratches and slashes and bites – he breathed easier. He felt warmer, heavier, and Naruto kissed his forehead again, drowning his love and his fear and his terrible ache in the man's silken hair.
His eye did not heal, however. The scar remained sharp and unforgiving, and Naruto wondered if magic had a time limit.
Then the man jumped up, recoiling from his touch, and Naruto's rage blazed once more.
He wondered if, had the man lingered in his arms, seeking him much like he did when their situation was reversed, he could have forgiven him.
If he told him, just once, that he loved him…
But the man pulled on his wounded arm, healed the cut, and called him an idiot. He acted as if Naruto was a nuisance; as if his blood was some unbearable substance that –
Naruto broke his pencil.
He flinched, furious with himself, and retrieved a new pencil from his bag. He finished the test and glared at his answers. He could not bring himself to get up and hand the paper in, to stand so close…
Naruto closed his eyes, trying to rein in his emotions, and suddenly remembered what Sasuke had said. All he had to do was, somehow, reach out with his mind. Naruto frowned, but weirder things had happened, and he wanted to know – he had to know –
He had to know if the man cared for him, too.
Naruto furrowed his brow and tried to reach, whatever that meant. He breathed in, breathed out, and drowned the endless chaos of his thoughts. He sank deeper. He felt himself leaning closer, drifting, weightless and chained, floating… He followed the path of his pain and fury and shifted, slowly, toward something darker.
A black abyss – a bottomless chasm, carved deep into his mind – and not his mind.
The black mass felt solid and ethereal, smoke-like and as sharp as a blade.
He imagined himself slowly drifting inside –
His heart burst. His body was flooded with longing and grief, his own and foreign, pulling him under and drowning him –
Something slapped him – and did not touch him. An invisible force knocked the air out of him and pushed him out, shoving him back into the edges of his own mind –
Where the misery was muddled and red, amorphous and familiar.
His eyes snapped open, wide and frightened –
And met Sensei's black eye.
The man looked straight at him, his expression torn and breathless, and said nothing.
His eye penetrated into him, delved into the depth of his soul, and pinned him against the edge of his mind.
I found him, Naruto thought. His breath was shallow and rapid. I found him.
The man did not want to be found. The howling agony locked within the darkness of his mind felt like a hand closing around his throat with an iron hold. Choking him.
Naruto lifted his hand instinctively and gripped his own neck. He could not breathe.
The man's chest shuddered, lips parted in a sudden grimace as he forced himself to look away. His shoulders tensed and clenched so hard Naruto could see the line of muscle through the baggy shirt, and his Adam's apple shivered twice as he swallowed.
The pressure was gone.
The black smoke shot flashes of pain, piercing like lightning, slowly condensed back into itself, a dense mass of a storm collapsing unto itself. Contained yet darker and sharper than before.
Naruto coughed and heaved as he drew much-needed air into his lungs. He slumped against the chair, dizzy and cold, and dropped his hand.
He could not take his eyes off the man who flinched under his gaze.
His breaths were shallow and labored. Sasuke said he could find him; he did not say what it would feel like. He did not say… he did not say how real it felt. He did not –
Naruto blinked, lips parted as he gasped when a hand – cool and imaginary and real – brushed against the rapidly pulsing veins of his neck. The fleeting touch eased the crushing pain of the choking hold that never took place. It felt like an apology.
Naruto swallowed and swatted his hand at nothing, dismissing the touch. Jaw clenched, he packed his bag and stormed out.
Kakashi waited for the kids to finish their tests. They turned in their paper, smiling and wishing him a happy summer vacation, and waved goodbye.
Some were more sincere than others. Sakura hugged him after pointing out – rather cheekily – that he was no longer her teacher. Sasuke shook his hand, which caught him off guard.
Naruto did not even turn in his paper.
Kiba turned in his work, grumbled something that may have been parting words, and left. Kakashi was, finally, alone.
His breath escaped his lips as the tension of holding himself up evaporated from his shoulders. He slowly slid onto the floor, then raked his fingers through his hair and buried his face in his palms. Naruto… he gritted his teeth. The teen refused to leave his thoughts, haunting him when he was conscious and infiltrating his dreams when he wasn't.
Every interaction they had ended with a disaster.
His fault.
Kakashi rubbed his eyes, the one that was tired and the one that hurt every day for the past month.
From what Sasuke explained, he inferred that the bond worked a lot like the telepathy connection between those of the Uchiha clan. One could reach out – and feel the other. He concluded that he felt Naruto's pain only in intense situations when the teen reached out – without even knowing what he was doing.
The past month proved him wrong, unless Naruto spent every waking moment thinking about him and –
That was, he had to admit, a likely possibility.
The teen was furious and hurt, perhaps irrevocably. Kakashi must have underestimated his role, or rather, roles, in his life. He had never imagined Naruto would grow so attached, feel so betrayed, or… well. Apparently, his imagination was quite lacking. He tried to save him from those who hurt him and ended up joining their ranks.
Naruto stopped showing up to class. At first, Sakura tried to excuse his absence with unconvincing lies. When she ran out of possible excuses, she asked in a small voice if he intended to get Naruto in trouble. Kakashi, in response, showed her his attendance record.
He marked Naruto as present every single time.
Sasuke and Sakura did not turn on him as he had expected, but a wall stood between them. Neither, however, appeared to blame him for his actions. Kakashi wondered if he would have felt better had they done so. His own conviction in his decisions faded with each day he had to take a painkiller just to make it through.
He tried to leave him food, but the teen kicked it away. He tried to stand in his path, hoping he would approach him, but he turned his back and fled. He sat on the balcony, reading or playing the guitar Yamato lent him, but Naruto shut the door loudly in defiance.
Kakashi, at that point, stopped trying. Perhaps his actions were something that only time could heal.
Perhaps what he did was not meant to be forgiven.
If only he could have removed the bond that connected them… Sasuke's answer floated in his mind, causing him to flinch. He did, after much consideration – and two sleepless nights – cave in and ask Sasuke to read the book the teen kept mentioning.
Sasuke glared, then gruffly agreed. "It will change nothing," he warned.
Kakashi kept silent. He couldn't tell if he was comforted or terrified by his stark declaration.
The book indeed described various kinds of bonds between an Uchiha and a Senjo, as well as the depth of their connection. Those between a parent and a child or a pair of siblings were described as weak; they changed over time, even faded completely, and the only bridge between the two members of the bond was emotional. Those bonds, the book said, were of the heart.
The last bond described was different. It allowed one to feel the other's emotions but also to touch the other, a phenomenon named "ghostly touch." That was the bond evoked between lovers. That bond was of the soul.
That bond was permanent.
Whatever comfort the notion offered, however meager and tainted by guilt, dissipated the moment Naruto entered his class. He was late – reeking of misery and anger – and Kakashi's body howled with the need to grab the teen and comfort him, even though he was painfully aware he could no longer offer such comfort. He tried to distract himself with his book, wall away his emotions, and block Naruto's.
He never expected the teen to reach through to him. After all, he made it quite clear that he had no interest in a connection with him. He did not speak to him, did not look at him, avoided him whenever he could…
And yet, his mind shone with light and warmth that were not his own. He could feel Naruto stumbling into the most private, silenced, and damaged parts of his mind – and reacted instinctively.
He pushed him away, pain and agony flashing through him, leaking and lashing, and – somehow – choked him.
The teen looked at him, hurt and betrayed as he gasped for air, and Kakashi wished there was a way for him to indicate it was unintentional. He tried to touch him, gently this time, but Naruto dismissed him and left without a second glance.
Fuck. Kakashi rubbed his tired face one more time and got up. He made his way to Naruto's desk, noted the untouched chocolate, and picked up the test. He flickered through it – and, as expected, the teen aced it. He showed his work to the point Kakashi was mocking him and nothing more; no hint, hidden message, or even a drawing.
Right. Kakashi graded the exams, submitted the grades, and drove to his apartment. Everything he owned was already packed in boxes. Naruto's drawings needed a box of their own.
He wondered what Kumogakure would be like.
His dogs whined when he entered, so his mood must have been quite foul. He changed his clothes and took them out for a run. If he ran hard enough, fast enough, far enough, perhaps the pain in his eye would fade… or his body will hurt enough to offer a distraction. That second option was more likely.
He ran and ran until his dogs barked, demanding a break.
Kakashi leaned against a tree and sank into the soft grass. He retrieved his water bottle and drank greedily, drenching himself in the process, and slowed down his breaths. Not nearly hard enough.
His phone vibrated.
Kakashi sighed and stared at the canopy above. Bull sat next to him and started to lick his hair quite thoroughly until every strand covered in drool defied gravity.
Great.
His phone vibrated again.
He shoved Bull's well-meaning tongue away and took out his phone.
'Channel 12,' Jiraiya texted. 'NOW!'
Kakashi frowned and pressed on the link the man sent. What could have possibly been important enough –
The phone started playing the channel's live feed, which depicted a young, rather excited journalist as she walked toward an apartment complex – his apartment complex – which meant –
Kakashi sat up. The competition announcement. Then, it must have meant that –
He turned up the volume.
" – and now, let's meet the brilliant mathematician who earned the honorable second place – and quite a large sum of money – Mr. Naruto Uzumaki!" the woman announced. She knocked on the teen's door. "Mr. Uzumaki's proof was declared to be a most astounding continuation of Professor Namikaze's work on the Theory of Triangles – which was abandoned fourteen years ago. Perhaps Mr. Uzumaki could shade some light as to why – "
The door opened and revealed the blond teen. Naruto, jumpy and suspicious, glared at the journalist. He blocked the entrance to the apartment with his body and frowned. "Yeah?"
The woman blinked, clearly surprised to see someone this young. "Oh, um, are you Mr. Uzumaki?" she recovered.
Naruto's frown deepened. His eyes flickered toward the cameraman and then up, glowering at the boom mic that must have been out of frame. "Who's asking?" he grumbled.
The woman blinked, taken aback by his raw distrust. "I'm here to deliver the news of a submission winning the honorable second place in our country's yearly mathematical competition! This is reported live to celebrate the works of our country's esteemed mathematicians," she said, smiling beatifically. "Are you Mr. Uzumaki?" she asked again.
Naruto shifted his weight, looking uncomfortable. "I am," he confessed. "I think. But I didn't apply for any competition." He crossed his arms. "Maybe you're confusing me with someone else."
The door opened wider, and Sasuke appeared, staring unblinkingly at the journalist. "What's going on?" he demanded.
Naruto shrugged. "A dumb idea for a prank or something."
"Hey! Naruto! Sasuke! You're on TV!" Sakura ran out, joining the group. "Naruto! The heading says you won loads of money for some math stuff you wrote!"
Naruto's glower intensified. He looked down. "You're probably looking for the man next door," he muttered. "I didn't submit anything."
The woman looked more and more baffled. She opened and closed her lips, gaping, then shook her head and retrieved a flashy set of papers. "Here's the proof that was submitted," she said, handing Naruto the paper. "Is this… did you – "
Naruto accepted the paper. His confused frown disappeared when his eyes widened with recognition. He gripped the form, his knuckles white and his breath quickening. "How." He swallowed. "How'd you get this?" he demanded. "I only showed it to – " His voice faltered and broke. He looked away.
Sasuke glared at his proof. "Triangles, again?" He rolled his eyes, then glared at the journalist. "Does it say who submitted the proof?"
The journalist looked quite unnerved. "Oh, well, yes," she managed. "Dr. Kakashi Hatake. He wrote a recommendation." Her eyes widened when Naruto's head shot up, his eyes seeking hers.
"Sensei…" he choked, then swallowed with difficulty. "Sensei submitted it?" he blurted, breathless. "He wrote a recommendation?" he whispered.
The journalist frowned. Her eyes flickered between the three teens, but Sakura moved to hug Naruto, Sasuke glared daggers, and Naruto looked seconds from tears.
Kakashi smashed his head into the tree behind him.
The journalist handed him another paper. "Here's the recommendation," she said slowly. "And the winning certificate – "
Naruto all but ripped the recommendation from her hands, ignoring the certificate. His eyes scanned the written words again and again.
Sasuke took the certificate. He cocked his brow. "You did the impossible. You made money out of math."
Naruto did not appear to hear him. His fingers trembled as his eyes welled with tears and –
Kakashi gripped his eye, hissing at the onslaught of pain.
Sakura took away the paper. "Stop crying, Naruto! You'll stain it," she ordered curtly as she cradled his head against her neck. "Aww! Sensei wrote such nice things! You should frame it." She brushed his hair. "When did you write the proof?"
Naruto wiped his eyes. "It was a gift," he mumbled. "You should give him the money. I don't want it." He walked inside, shoulders shaking.
"A gift? You can't gift a proof! I think. Oi, Naruto!" Sakura cried as she ran after him.
Sasuke glowered at them and then angled his head to face the journalist. "He doesn't mean that. Where's the check."
The journalist gave him the rest of her stack. "Um. We need to take a picture –"
"You do not." Sasuke took the packet, glared some more, and closed the door in her face.
The journalist blinked, shocked, and turned to face the camera with a grimaced smile. "Well, what an unexpected turn of events! Who said high school isn't full of drama?"
She managed an awkward chuckle. "Back to you – "
Kakashi turned off the feed.
His phone vibrated again.
'KAKASHI! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY GODSON?!'
He turned off his phone.
Notes
All right I hear y'all loud and clear haha guess Kakashi and Naruto are stuck together forever now
I will explore more aspects of the bond later on, but for now, I figured it's about time Naruto tried to actively use the connection (and catch Kakashi off guard because why not)
So yep, the year has ended, Naruto got into Konoha, and Kakashi is packed and ready to go.
Also... Naruto totally snuck a few kisses in there. In his defense, Kakashi was dying and emotions ran high.
Next chapter – someone we haven't seen for a while is going to make a reappearance!
That's it! What did you guys think? Please let me know and I hope to see you next Friday!
Next chapter – someone we haven't seen for a while is going to make a reappearance!
