Disclaimer: This is a non-commercial work of fanfiction. Anything recognizable from Newsies belongs to Disney and not to me.
Chapter 101: Visitors from Boston
"Here's the rosemary, Mama," Sadie said, setting down the basket of fragrant herbs that she'd just picked from the planter box on the rooftop. "Would you like me to start bundling it?"
Miriam, in the middle of braiding Lilly's hair, nodded. "If you could, that would help. I still have to run over to number twenty-two to make up the bed and set up the rest of the kitchenette for Judith and John."
"I can finish Lilly's hair," Abby volunteered as she entered the room. She set the book she'd been carrying down on the kitchen table and received the hairbrush from her mother.
"Thank you, girls," Miriam said, removing her apron. "I'll head over now, but I'll be back before we have to leave for the train station." So saying, she quickly took her leave.
Sadie procured a roll of twine from the kitchen cabinet and sat down at the table across from Lilly. "You look so pretty, Lil," she smiled. "Judith's going to be thrilled to see you." In an unexpected show of verve, Lilly had expressed her wish to go down to Grand Central Station with the rest of the welcoming party to meet Judith and her family once they got off the train. The disclosure had been met with surprise and delight, but it had thrown Miriam's plans into disarray, as she hadn't factored in the time necessary to prepare her second-eldest daughter for the first trip she'd taken out of the apartment in months, and now she was scrambling to get Lilly ready while finishing up the last of the preparations for their guests' arrival.
"What's Mama going to use the rosemary for?" Abby asked as Sadie gathered a handful of sprigs into a bundle.
"Most of it is going to be dried," Sadie answered. "I imagine that Mama's anticipating cooking John's favorite dish - that lamb with rosemary stuffing he's always going on about - so she'll need to replenish her supply in the pantry." She snipped off a length of twine, then added half-jokingly, "Perhaps I ought to keep a bunch of it for myself and sleep with it under my pillow. They say that it helps with memory, and competency exams are coming up in a few days. I need all the help I can get."
"Why haven't you been studying with David?" Abby wanted to know.
"He doesn't need me to review the material with him," Sadie answered, winding the string around her bunch of rosemary. "He's much better off working on his own time, and he's been busy lately."
"Papa said he lost his voice."
Sadie nodded. "I imagine it's not uncommon in his line of work."
Abby looked slightly concerned. "I hope Les isn't being too mean to him," she mused, almost to herself. "He must be teasing David something awful since he knows he's got the upper hand."
Sadie ducked her head, her eyes focused on tying off the bundle of rosemary but her conscience rising up to silently chide her. Perhaps Les was taking advantage of his older brother's speechlessness in order to amuse himself...but even if that was the case, he wasn't the only one guilty of vexing Davey.
She'd completely overstepped just moments ago on the rooftop when she'd caught him looking at her. It had been second nature to ease out of the situation with a quip, and then to throw him off balance instead (for it hadn't been the first time she'd caught someone studying her intently), but still, her actions had been completely uncalled for. Davey wasn't some boy on the street making eyes at her; he was her serious, thoughtful, earnest neighbor who'd likely had a perfectly pragmatic reason for his perusal. Perhaps there had been a sprig of rosemary caught in her hair, or a stain on her apron, or something of the like.
In any case, she ought to have known better than to tease him. But, in the impulsiveness of the moment, she'd let her impish side get the better of her and had succeeded in discomfiting him with her pertness. The troubled look on his face had made a flood of remorse immediately rush through her, and she'd found herself lamenting her lapse in judgment, for Davey was a respectable kind of boy, the type of person who would, for the sake of politeness, put up with her habitual eschewing of propriety, but would never stoop to such indecorum himself. He'd forgiven her quickly enough, but she could tell that he was bewildered and distressed, and it only deepened her regret, for she had only meant to tease, never to make him unhappy.
A year and a half ago, she wouldn't have thought twice about the matter...but she was a different girl now, wasn't she? Hadn't the past taught her to be more circumspect and careful?
But again, she reasoned, this was Davey. She'd always felt compelled to tease him, though she wasn't sure why that compulsion was so strong. She did enjoy seeing him a little flustered, and thought it was rather endearing how he fell silent when he didn't want to answer a question but didn't want to lie. But there was more to it than that. Davey felt safe to her. Steady. Secure. And so different, with his deliberate manner of speaking that was the opposite of the free-and-easy discourse she herself employed. Drawing her neighbor out - whether to serious discussion or to something a little more lighthearted - had become deeply rewarding, and while Sadie had realized long ago that asking questions and speaking sincerely were actually the best ways to get Davey to open up, there was a small (and probably slightly wicked) part of her that wasn't above throwing him off balance every once in a while - though that still brought her back to the unanswered question of what on earth possessed her to do it.
He wasn't like anyone she'd ever known, somehow both reserved and open, with a profusion of thoughts running through his mind and a wealth of emotions in his eyes, all of which could be easily passed over by someone not taking the time to look. He was an conundrum of sorts, and yet there was an accessibility that drew her again and again, that intriguing possibility that if she just could ask him the right question or linger just a bit longer on a particular point, she would finally solve the puzzle - not because he was intentionally being evasive, but because his true self was hidden so deeply inside that nothing short of a thoughtful and concerted effort would draw it out. It was this enigmatic nature, concealed beneath a quiet, unassuming exterior, that so strongly fascinated Sadie and drew her to Davey again and again.
There was no doubt in her mind that he would go on to be someone great one day, for he was intelligent, thoughtful, and brave, and what doors wouldn't open to him with that combination of traits? If she took the liberty of teasing him a little, it was because she honestly thought that it would have no real effect on him, for what was the harm in a little good-natured pestering when the recipient was far too grounded to be swayed by any silliness or occasional breaches of decorum?
But she'd crossed the line that day, and needed to be careful that she didn't overstep again. Davey had made it clear that he was uncomfortable, and that reason alone was enough for her to check any impulsive tendencies. She would make an effort to keep a respectful distance from him in the future. She would be more mindful of her words. And hopefully, if she was polite and sensible and showed that she was sorry for her mistake, he'd forget about the incident, and it would all blow over before too long. She didn't want to strain their friendship simply because she wasn't willing to make adjustments when she found herself in error.
Having settled this in her mind, Sadie finished bundling the rosemary, deftly tying the rest of the sprigs into bunches and then hanging them up to dry in the pantry. Abby had finished braiding Lilly's hair by this time, and the three sisters made their way to the sitting room area of the apartment just as their father came through the front door.
"Are my girls ready for a carriage ride?" he asked, beaming at his daughters. "It's almost four o'clock, and we've got a train to meet."
"Oh, it's good to be back!" Judith Feinberg exclaimed as she sank down onto the bed with a little sigh. "This quilt reminds me so much of home, and Mama even remembered my favorite flannel sheets, too."
Sadie bounced up beside her sister, immediately grabbing a pillow and curling up next to the older girl to rest her head on Judith's shoulder.
"It's so good to have you back, Ju," she murmured affectionately. "I wish you could stay with Abby and me in our room just like old times, but I suppose it would be inhospitable of me to begrudge John his wife on the first night of his visit!"
"He knows we need our sister time," Judith smiled, "which is why he's over at the apartment talking to Mama and Papa, and you're here with me."
"An hour to talk won't be nearly enough time," Sadie lamented.
"But it's only my first night here! We'll have plenty of opportunities to talk over the next few weeks," Judith promised. Her eyes were merry, and Sadie could tell that she was happy to be back in Manhattan amongst family. The Feinbergs had been heartily welcomed upon their arrival, and the lively party had made their way back to the tenement, where the visitors had been settled into their temporary living quarters, a modestly-sized and currently vacant apartment on the second floor. After an early dinner, more conversation had followed at the Beckers' apartment until it was time for the boys to be put to bed. Judith accordingly had settled them down before Sadie had joined her for some long-awaited private conversation.
"I've so many things I want to ask you, Sadie," Judith said eagerly. "But I can tell you've got something on your mind, so I'll let you speak first."
"I'm just so happy you're back," Sadie confessed, looking up at her sister. "It feels like it's been such a long time since we've had you with us." She sighed. "We all miss you terribly, Ju. Things aren't the same without you, and I fear I'm a poor substitute in your absence, especially where Mama's concerned."
"You haven't been baking again, have you?" Judith teased.
"How am I supposed to get any better at it if I don't practice?" Sadie demanded, giving her sister an affronted look.
"You do make a good point. And, to be fair, it's only your baking that's really all that bad. Your soup is excellent, and I hope you'll make a pot of it for me while I'm here. The boys both love it, too."
"If that's the truth, then they shall have as many tureens of soup as Aunt Sadie can possibly decoct! Far be it from me to pass up an opportunity to feed those growing appetites. They're both getting so tall, Ju - Caleb's likely to pass me up soon, and he's only ten!"
"Their mother was of some height, from what I understand," Judith explained. "John said they could see eye to eye, and he's not a short man."
"No indeed," Sadie agreed. Her brother-in-law was of rather imposing stature, tall and broad-shouldered with a serious demeanor that only enhanced the commanding nature of his presence. He wasn't dictatorial, though; there was a thoughtful fairness to his words, and while he didn't speak much, when he did speak, his words were always well-chosen.
Judith's attraction to the banker's assistant hadn't made sense at first to Sadie, who had been only thirteen years old when her sister had begun her courtship. John was nice enough, but he was solemn and laconic, and he was several years older than Judith, a widower with two sons from his previous marriage. To the more cheerfully-dispositioned Sadie, he had seemed like an ill match for her vibrant if sensibly-minded sister who'd had other admirers of a far more dashing nature call on her.
But John was the man whom Judith had set her affections on, and as time had passed, Sadie had grown to appreciate his steadiness, and even at times his gravity (though she still privately wished that he smiled and spoke a bit more). He'd certainly been a devoted and faithful husband, and it was clear that he adored his wife and sons. Now that Sadie was older and more perceptive herself, she knew that this kind of sincere affection wasn't something you came across everyday in a world so full of duplicity and heartbreak, and she was glad that her sister had found someone who truly loved her, even if he'd seemed like an unconventional choice at first.
"How is John liking his new job?" Sadie asked. A promising position at a well-established bank had taken the Feinbergs to Boston, and John had recently been promoted.
"He likes the fact that he doesn't have to travel so much and has his own office, but I don't think he particularly likes all of the socializing required by his new position," Judith answered. "He's not at all predisposed to hobnobbing with folks whom he doesn't know and has no interest in impressing. But he makes the best of it. And the extra money helps."
"Mama and Papa will be happy to hear that he's settling in. They were concerned he wouldn't take to it at first."
"Well, John's nothing if not adaptable. His life hasn't been an easy one, and he's had plenty of practice dealing with unideal situations, but he doesn't complain. That fortitude is one of the things I've always admired most about him."
"I always thought you liked him for his money and aristocratic good looks," Sadie teased.
"John's not filthy rich, Sadie - you know that. He's like our family: comfortable. We don't eat off of fine china, but we're not hurting, either. And our place isn't grand, but it's lovely in its own way. The boys have everything they need, and I'm quite happy with my situation." Judith smiled, then added, "And as far as looks go, all I can say is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
"Spoken like a truly wise older sister." Sadie smiled. "It does my heart good to know that you're settled and satisfied, Ju. It almost makes losing you worth it to know that you're so happily situated with your new family."
"I do miss all of you terribly in Boston," her sister confessed. "But I am happy. It's not what I dreamed about when I was a little girl, perhaps, but in so many ways it's better than anything I could have conjured up myself." She wrapped her arm around Sadie's shoulders. "I wish the same for you and Lilly and Abby - that your futures would be full of serendipitous and gratifying surprises."
"Abby will be happy so long as she has her books and plenty of uninterrupted time to read them," Sadie joked.
"I'm sure that she'll always love reading," Judith agreed, "but her tastes will expand and change with time, and it may be that she comes to hope for other things as well." She gave Sadie a curious look.
"Which leads me to the question I've been most desirous to ask you: in your last letter, there was a tiny, solitary line about a 'silly scheme' you've been mulling over for the past several months. I'd dearly like to know what that scheme entails, and why you characterized it as something frivolous when it's clearly been weighing on you for quite some time."
Sadie sat up, hugging a pillow to herself and feeling suddenly shy. "It's not a well-conceived idea at all, Ju," she murmured. She'd forgotten that she'd even mentioned it to her sister. "It's...well, it actually has to do with what we've been talking about - the future, that is."
Judith nodded, silently inviting her to continue.
"I've just been thinking about our family's situation," Sadie said, faltering a bit as she tried to gather her thoughts, "particularly the lack of community and support that Mama and the rest of us feel since we have Lilly at home with us. It's an unusual situation, and I know it's taken a toll on us in different ways, as much as we've embraced it. I've been wondering if other families in the same situation face a similar sense of isolation, and if anything could be done to offset that."
"What kind of resources did you have in mind?" Judith asked.
"That's where this isn't particularly well thought-through," Sadie admitted. She bit her lip, pondering the question for a moment before she continued, "I suppose there are the tangible means of support that could be offered - providing respite for those caring for disabled loved ones, helping with the housework or cooking meals, things like that… But there are the intangible things, too: socializing opportunities for people like Lilly with others who understand them and won't treat them as imbeciles, support and community for the family members who provide care and often have to put their own needs aside…" she trailed off, giving her sister an apologetic shrug. "I'm not much of a strategist, Ju, so that's the extent of my scheming, but I'll admit that the idea's been in the back of my mind for a while, and it's shown no signs of conveniently going away. It's not like me at all - you know how I like to live in the moment, and how silly I generally am - but right now, if I could have one wish for my future, it would be that I could somehow find a way to turn this array of scattered thoughts into something that could help someone - someone like Mama, or Lilly...or even myself...to not feel so alone."
Sadie hugged the pillow tighter, feeling a little embarrassed. It was a pie-in-the-sky kind of notion, and a loosely-defined one at that. She wished that she had a better grasp on what she hoped to accomplish and how she might get there, but right now it was simply an unfinished thought, frail and faulty. She'd held it close at first, not daring to share it with anyone for fear that once she did, reality would set in and crush the fledgling notion, but as it had grown and persisted, she'd found herself desirous to give voice to it, which was probably what had prompted her to mention it in her last letter. If there was anyone who would shoot down the idea gently but firmly, it would be Judith.
"I know it's hardly a brilliant idea, Ju," Sadie ventured. "But that's what's been on my mind." She looked Judith in the eye. "Tell me honestly, now, what you think. I'd rather have my hopes dashed by a loving, supportive voice than a less benevolently-inclined one, so don't indulge me or spare my feelings. I'm eighteen now, and can certainly handle any well-deserved criticism." So saying, she lifted her chin just a bit, bracing herself for Judith's answer.
To her surprise, her sister laughed a little, then pulled her into a hug.
"You dear thing," she murmured.
Sadie frowned, a bit hurt at the lighthearted response. "Don't tease me, Ju," she muttered, pulling away.
"I'm not," the older girl answered. "I'm honored that you'd share your thoughts with me, much less invite me to critique them." She sat back, her eyes shining as she wiped away a tear. "I'm just proud of you, that's all."
Sadie huffed. "Because I had a serious thought for once in my life?"
"Because you're daring to hope again. You're giving yourself the chance to envision what could be."
"That's scarcely praiseworthy," Sadie demurred, dropping her gaze to brush at her skirt. "I've accomplished nothing as of yet - they're only idle dreams."
"Sadie, a little over a year ago dreaming wasn't even possible. That's what you told me in your letters - that you couldn't bear to think about what the future might hold, let alone imagine that it might be a happy one. It broke my heart to hear it."
Sadie didn't say anything in response, memories of that terrible season causing tears to form in her own eyes.
"Nothing's changed, Judith," she said softly.
Her sister shook her head. "Everything's changed," she contended. "If you're beginning to hope again, that means you're beginning to heal."
"Hope won't heal the past."
"But it can open doors to the future. And I fervently believe that the past will not keep you from a happy future, Sadie - if you're willing to let yourself reach for it."
She smiled, and at her tender look, a tear trickled down Sadie's cheek.
Judith reached over to brush it away. "Don't be afraid," she said gently. "You aren't meant to stay hidden, Sadie. You are meant to live, and to enrich others lives in that living. They need you. We need you."
Sadie sniffled and attempted to dry her eyes with the sleeve of her dress. It wasn't a very ladylike thing to do, but she was too emotional at the moment to go searching for a handkerchief.
"Thank you," she murmured. Her sister's words had touched something in her, and though the residual doubts and fears lingered, something had stirred inside of Sadie at the thought that maybe, just maybe, the shadows of the past were beginning to give way to the faintest glimmer of light, whatever that might look like.
"I didn't mean to bring up unpleasant memories," Judith said, squeezing Sadie's hand, "but I did want to reflect back to you how different you sound now than you did a year ago. Perhaps the change has been occurring gradually, and I'm only just now seeing it, but it's very evident that the change is there."
"I'm glad you think so!" Sadie exclaimed. "I confess it's difficult for me to see it myself, but I hope that you're right. I have been thinking a bit more about the future lately."
"I'm curious to know what catalyzed your idea," Judith admitted. "It's very like you to think of bringing people together around a common interest - or, in this case, a shared struggle - but the desire to bring about change beyond simply your own circle of acquaintance isn't something I've seen before. What brought that notion on?"
"A combination of things, I suppose," Sadie mused. "Part of it has been realizing all that Mama has to do for Lilly now that you're gone. I've struggled to fill your shoes as a helper to her, and in that I've seen - in ways I'd never been aware of before - what a complex situation it is. But I suppose what really got me thinking about affecting change on a larger scale was the newsboy strike I wrote of back in July."
Quickly, she reiterated the genesis and outcome of the strike for Judith, summarizing the conversations she'd had with Davey during its unfolding and its aftermath and the thoughts that had been sparked by their discourse which had led to her unconventional idea.
"It makes sense that having an insider's view of the strike - especially an insider who's no older than you - would have inspired some further contemplation on your part," Judith said, once Sadie had finished her disclosure. "And I must say, I'm quite eager to meet this David of yours. You described him in your letters as a rather remarkable boy, and in the past that would have mostly meant that he was uncommonly good-looking, but clearly that's not his salient feature."
Sadie gave her sister a small smile. "No indeed, Ju."
"Your taste in boys has deepened."
"Perhaps," Sadie laughed. "But this isn't that kind of interest. I admire Davey greatly, but I'm not sweet on him. I like our friendship quite well the way it is."
"Do you think he feels the same about you?" Judith inquired.
Sadie shifted uncomfortably, thinking of the incident on the rooftop that had taken place earlier that day.
"I'd venture to say that he does not hold me in the same high regard that I do him," she answered slowly. "That's not to say that he isn't perfectly courteous and kind - and perhaps there's even a bit of fond indulgence that he harbors towards me - but he's much more sensible than I am. I doubt he'd find anything in me to pique a lasting interest or admiration, even if he deems my company agreeable enough."
"You're being a bit too hard on yourself, I'm sure."
"Only extrapolating from the facts, Ju. You'll see when you meet him; he's a different kind of boy. He's thoughtful and intentional and far too focused to be taken in, which is fortunate, because it keeps things unambiguously straightforward for the both of us."
"Well, unambiguous or not, I'll need to thank him for giving my sister a bit of her verve back. It seems his friendship has made you happier and more hopeful, and that's worth a great deal to me." Judith looked thoughtful. "Will he be coming to Papa's office for tutoring this coming week?"
"Not this week," Sadie answered. "We have competency exams coming up at school, so there's no new material being covered. But I'm sure you'll meet him at Papa's new year's party for the tenants, if not before then. His family lives just a few doors down from this apartment, and he's regularly stopping by the office to help Papa on his projects, so there's a chance you might run into him." She gave her sister a warning look. "Whenever you do meet him though, Ju, I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't subject him to your normal interrogation."
"Interrogation? I can't imagine what you mean."
"You know very well what I mean, Judith. For all of your sensibility, you do pry a great deal."
"I simply find people fascinating and want to know more about them!"
"But you'll fluster him with your leading questions, and he'll go quiet if you do that."
A smile flitted across Judith's face. "You speak from experience, I see," she observed drolly.
"Well, naturally." Sadie lifted her chin. "I have plenty of experience dealing with your interrogation."
"And plenty of experience flustering David too, perhaps?" Judith raised an eyebrow.
"Why, you - !" Sadie swung the pillow she'd been holding in her sister's direction, landing a square hit.
"Your defensiveness is rather incriminating," Judith teased, reaching across the bed to procure the other pillow and holding it in front of her like a shield. She let out a little shriek as Sadie pulled it away. "No fair!"
"The attack will stop when you agree not to interrogate Davey," Sadie stipulated, pummeling her sister with the cushions.
"You'll wake the boys!" Judith protested, curling up into a ball.
"So much the better!" Sadie declared. "I'd welcome their assistance." But after a few more well-placed blows, she dutifully curtailed the pillow barrage.
"I'm serious, Ju," she said, setting the cushions aside and giving her sister as severe a look as she could muster. "You can chit chat with Davey all you want, but if you put him through the ringer, I'll never forgive you."
"I promise, I'll be a model of decorum," Judith declared, smoothing her hair back into place. "Just as I always am."
Sadie huffed, finding it a rather unsatisfactory answer. "Well...see that you are," she ordered sternly. But she couldn't stop the smile that spread across her face.
Teasing or not, it was so good to have her sister back again.
A/N: To all of the wonderfully patient readers who at some point expressed their hope for more Sadie/Davey-centric content, your moment has arrived, as their arc will be getting the majority of the page time from this point onward (though of course there will still be ample attention given to this story's various other subplots). Thanks as always for reading - if you have any comments or questions, I'd love to hear them!
