Disclaimer: This is a non-commercial work of fanfiction. Anything recognizable from Newsies belongs to Disney and not to me.
Chapter 124: Into the Rain
A foreboding dampness hung in the air, and the thunderclouds blanketing the sky growled angrily overhead, causing Davey to quicken his pace as he wove his way through the foot traffic on Worth Street. He was on his way back from running an errand for Mr. Becker - dropping off paperwork at the Manhattan housing office - and though he'd been fortunate enough to avoid the rain so far, the downpour predicted for the day would likely begin to fall at any moment, and he was eager to escape the shower and return to the relative warmth indoors.
His trip to the housing office was the second-to-last item on his list of tasks to complete for the day; all that remained for the afternoon was to process some paperwork for the incoming tenants who would be occupying the unrented apartment on the second floor within a week's time. Sophie Higgins' temporary stay there would soon be coming to an end, as Race had found lodging for her with the newsgirls of the Bronx, and Davey was thankful that the timing had worked out for all parties involved, even if the situation wasn't exactly what the Higginses had hoped for.
It would be hard for Race to let his sister go again, but at least this time she would be out of the abusive situation that she'd been under in Brooklyn. Davey had been deeply unsettled upon first hearing Race's description of what Sophie had endured, and while his mind had immediately turned to the task of trying to solve the practical and more pressing aspects of the problem, his inward disquietude had lingered long after the logistical matters had been squared away.
The thought of a parent selfishly taking advantage of their own child, let alone allowing someone else to physically harm that child, was appalling to him, and while he knew that it wasn't exactly uncommon, he couldn't forget the anguished feeling that had gripped his heart upon seeing the obvious signs of ill treatment on Sophie's face when he'd first met her.
He'd always been sensitive to physical violence; even as a young boy, the aftermath of a schoolyard brawl - seeing his classmates' swollen eyes and bloodied noses and missing teeth - had been enough to unsettle him. He'd kept his disconcertion to himself, aware that he wasn't supposed to be bothered by "the usual scuffles between boys," but the uneasy feeling had always stuck with him a little longer than perhaps was normal. He wasn't opposed to fighting in self defense and knew that physical altercations were sometimes an unavoidable part of life, but he'd never been able to adopt the kind of nonchalant attitude towards them that he knew he was supposed to have (though child abuse, of course, was a different and much darker scenario than a fistfight between peers).
His own parents - especially his father - occasionally had flashes of temper or moments where they reacted in anger, but they were generally level-headed, if somewhat strict as a rule. And while Davey's disposition had naturally inclined him to dread their displeasure, he'd never felt the need to physically fear them. The thought that a child as young as Sophie had lived under such haunting apprehension for a good part of her life was grieving in a way that he couldn't describe, and he was thankful that she was now out of immediate danger, though he suspected that the lingering harm of what she'd endured would take some time to truly heal.
Turning onto Baxter Street, Davey continued making his way towards the tenement, lost in his thoughts. The combination of the weather and his sobering rumination made him feel rather melancholy, but he did his best to shake off his despondency as he walked the next few blocks and his destination came into view.
As he drew near, he caught sight of a familiar figure descending the stairs, and his mood immediately lifted as he saw Sadie make her way down to the street, tilting her face upwards to survey the clouds overhead. She was wearing a jaunty-looking cape over her usual coat and had a large woven basket on her arm.
"No umbrella, Chare?" Davey queried as he came within earshot.
The landlord's daughter turned to him with a smile.
"Good afternoon, Davey. I'd ask you the same question, but it appears that you've sensibly completed your errands before the shower hit. I'm hoping that my luck will hold as well."
"It looks like it's going to start raining any minute," he cautioned. "Do you have many stops to make?"
"I only need to drop off some finished alterations at the tailor's, then mail a letter at the post office," she replied. "It shouldn't take much more than a half hour if I'm quick about it, and I'd rather not bother with an umbrella."
It was on the tip of his tongue to suggest that she reconsider, but he refrained from speaking the thought aloud.
"Well, if you're going to insist on chancing it," he said instead, "would you like some company - I mean, help - would you like some help running your errands? I could carry things for you, or…" he trailed off awkwardly, unsure of what else he could offer.
"I'm not sure that I'll need help carrying anything…" Sadie responded, looking thoughtful.
"Oh - that's all right," he said quickly.
"...but if you're offering me the pleasure of your company," she continued, "that offer I would happily accept."
She smiled up at him, a knowing expression on her face, and the realization that she'd so easily seen past his facade made him feel slightly embarrassed...but he also couldn't stop himself from grinning in return.
"Only if you wouldn't mind," he answered sheepishly.
"I wouldn't mind at all," Sadie replied. She glanced again at the darkening sky, and then back at him. "Do you want to run up and get something warmer to wear, though? I know you're not particularly fond of the cold, and it's only going to get more chilly."
"Oh, no, I'll be fine, thanks," Davey said, caught off guard by the question. He didn't want to tell her that he was wearing the only coat that he owned. "It's not really that bad."
She looked like she wanted to question him, but after a moment only nodded. "If you're sure."
They started down the street.
"It looks like you've been productive," Davey observed, noting the nearly-full basket of tailored garments.
"We've had quite a few requests come in over the past several weeks," Sadie explained. "And Mr. Gorham has been less available lately. It's given me plenty to do and some additional income, which I'm grateful for."
"It seems like you always have something you're working on," he noted. Her industriousness had always impressed him a little, especially given the fact that her family's financial situation seemed comfortable enough where such extra work wouldn't be necessary.
"I do like to keep busy," Sadie confessed. "And about a year ago, I decided that I ought to start saving in earnest and putting aside as much money as possible instead of spending it on frivolous things."
"Is there anything in particular you're saving up for?" Davey asked curiously.
He'd only meant to make conversation, but a slightly troubled look crossed Sadie's face, and realized that perhaps it had been an impertinent question.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to pry," he amended quickly. "You don't have to elaborate if you don't want to."
"You weren't prying at all," she reassured him. But she hesitated for a moment, clearly thinking through her response.
"I suppose you could say that I'm saving up for the future," she said finally. "When my parents eventually pass away or become too frail to care for Lilly, I plan to support both of us with my income and with the money that I've saved up. My parents would want her to be able to remain at home for the duration of her life, and though they haven't spoken to my sisters or me about it directly, I know it's on their minds. Judith already has her own family to care for, and Abby is bright and ambitious and may pursue aspirations that would take her away from Manhattan, so it makes the most sense that I would be the one to oversee Lilly's care. I'd much rather have her with me if possible then send her away."
"That seems to dovetail with some of the hopes and dreams that you've shared," Davey remarked. "The ones about wanting to help families with disabled members like Lilly by making a place where they could live in community together. Maybe by then you'll have opened your own site with the modifications that you mentioned, and you and your own family and Lilly could all reside on the premises along with the rest of the tenants."
"That would indeed be a gratifying situation," Sadie agreed, "and the thought certainly appeals to me." She paused for a moment, then added almost wistfully, "But I have to admit that it's rather far-fetched. And it would most likely be only Lilly and myself in any case."
The statement caught him off guard. "What makes you say that?"
"In regards to the scenario you just described being far-fetched? Or in reference to it being only myself and Lilly?"
"Well...both," he clarified.
She smiled, but the expression didn't reach her eyes. "Regarding the first, I'm not sure that I have the skills or acumen necessary to accomplish such an endeavor. And regarding the second, I only meant that it's unlikely I would raise a family of my own."
"You'd...rather not?" The disclosure surprised him, for he knew that Sadie was fond of children.
"I would consider it a blessing to bring up my own little ones," she replied, "but that would require a life partner who would be willing to take on the responsibility of Lilly's care with me, and who would also have to face the scrutiny and criticism of those who would not understand the decision to keep her at home. I doubt that there are many who would be open to assuming those liabilities right from the start, especially when my sister requires so much care. There are many wonderful things about her...but most people don't take the time to see beyond the inconvenience of her condition."
"If you could find someone who would be willing to try, though...would you reconsider?"
"Perhaps," she answered lightly. "But there are other reasons why I might not be a particularly desirable bride." There was a soberness in her tone, but almost immediately she brushed it off, adding cheerfully, "For starters, I'd be terrible at keeping house; anyone foolish enough to join himself to me would be beleaguered by all sorts of ridiculous mishaps, despite my efforts to the contrary!"
It was a deflection, and Davey knew it, but he couldn't fathom the deeper meaning underlying her characteristic self-deprecating humor. She'd spoken as though she'd been thinking about the matter for quite some time, and it came out sounding like a foregone conclusion despite her almost-immediate attempt at levity. He could sense that there was much more behind her words than she was letting on...and yet, he couldn't parse out the hidden significance.
"In any case," Sadie continued briskly, "there's time before all of that needs to become a reality. My parents, thankfully, are in good health, and I've still much to learn and grow in before I settle down and take up the role of a self-sufficient, responsible woman."
She smiled up at him, and this time there was a bit of genuine mirth in her eyes. "You mentioned a while back when I found out about your poetry that I'd become privy to one of your most closely-guarded secrets, Davey...but I have to tell you that you've just now become privy to one of mine. I haven't mentioned my plan to anyone - about caring for Lilly long term, that is, or about the money that I've been saving up. So I suppose that makes us even, now."
He was still trying to wrap his mind around all that she'd shared, and found himself scrambling to respond to her confession. "I'm honored that you'd tell me, Chare," he managed.
"Well, even though this has been on my mind for quite some time, you're the one who most recently inspired me to think more about the future as a whole," she disclosed. "I'd never seriously considered before the idea that I could do something to effect change not just for myself, but for others. Our conversations about the newsboy strike - and your example - made me begin to entertain possibilities I never would have imagined otherwise. I know I don't sound very convincing when I'm constantly belittling my fitness for the endeavor...but that's only because the thought that I could have a positive impact on the world, even in a small way, is still so very new to me.
"It is a compelling idea, though," she continued, before he could say anything in response. "That picture you painted, I mean. It would be deeply gratifying to start a community home or some kind of cooperative living situation for families like mine, and to be able to oversee it while living among the tenants as a part of that community. I think it would make Lilly happy to have more chances to socialize with others who would accept and cherish her, and it would make me glad to see her thriving under such circumstances."
There was a hopeful if still tentative eagerness in her voice now, and Davey was struck by a feeling of fond but bittersweet bemusement, for a part of him was touched by the earnestness of her disclosure, and a part of him was still bewildered by the fact that someone with such a big heart for others could fail to recognize how lovely and capable she was herself.
He was tempted to refute her earlier claim that her perceived ineptness at housekeeping was enough to preclude her from winning the regard of a potential life partner and had to quickly stifle the desire to speak up, but he couldn't stop himself from internally revisiting the assertion and wondering again what had been behind it. He, of course, had no business imagining himself into any of her future plans...but surely someone else - someone more suitable for her - would be able to look past her so-called "unappealing" personality (as well as the complexities of Lilly's situation, as consequential as they would be) and see the good that was there if they really took the time. A girl as relational as Sadie should not have to walk through life alone if that was not what she desired, and despite the fact that he sensed her situation was far more complex than she'd let on, he was convinced that she would eventually find love with someone who could treasure her sweetly endearing nature for all that it was.
He wished, rather absurdly, that it could be him.
But of course that was a ludicrous thought, and he ought not to be thinking about the future in that way when they were both so young and when he wasn't even sure if his own affection for her was the kind that could go the distance. It was deep and sincere, of that he was certain. But he also knew that it was, as of yet, untried and impractical. To jump from mere heartfelt emotions to contemplating a lifelong future commitment seemed rather presumptuous, especially when there were so many pragmatic reasons why such a scenario was unlikely to materialize.
More importantly, Sadie was perfectly capable and didn't need him - or anyone - to be complete. He knew that full well. But he also knew - from the way that he'd responded to her earlier disclosure - that something in him wanted to support her in her dreams and goals, to co-labor by her side in meaningful work, to learn and grow and even fail together, facing whatever challenges came their way as -
Stop it, he told himself sternly. You cannot be thinking like that.
They'd been walking in silence for some time now, and he realized that he ought to say something aloud, but before he could, the clouds overhead rumbled again, and he found his attention momentarily diverted by the portent of approaching rain.
"Perhaps we ought to quicken our pace just a bit," Sadie murmured. They were more than halfway to the tailor's by this time, and he could tell that she didn't want to turn back, so he set aside his misgivings and did as she suggested.
They hurried down Chambers Street, Sadie gamely keeping pace with Davey's longer strides for several blocks, but eventually she began to fall behind.
"Let me take the basket for you, Chare," he offered, slowing down so that she could catch up.
She let out a breathless laugh as she drew even with him, surrendering her burden with a word of thanks. "I guess I did need help carrying things after all," she quipped.
Almost as soon as she'd said this, the rain began to fall, spattering the sidewalks with sizable droplets.
"We're only a block away," Sadie said, glancing up the street. "If you'd like to turn back now, I can make it from here. I'd rather you didn't have to get soaked for my sake."
"It's just water," he answered. "It'll dry." Though he did not relish the thought of being caught in the rain, he would have willingly endured any kind of unseasonable weather for just the chance to be in her company.
But, of course, it wouldn't do to tell her that.
Sadie nodded, apparently unwilling to argue when the rain was falling faster every minute, and the two of them set off again, managing to make it to the tailor's shop without the contents of the basket getting too wet. Mr. Gorham was attending to a customer when they arrived, but he gave Sadie a grateful nod and smiled at Davey, who set the basket down behind the counter where Sadie indicated. That errand finished, they ducked out of the tailor's shop and made their way towards the post office, which was located four blocks away on Church Street.
The rain was falling steadily by this time, and the foot traffic had become noticeably more frantic as pedestrians, hunched under umbrellas or hiding in their coats, hurried to get to their destinations. Automobiles and carriages trundled past, their drivers likewise focused on the road ahead, but despite their attentiveness, everything seemed to be moving slower, and the traffic began to bottleneck near an intersection where a tangle of agitated drivers and pedestrians had inadvertently created an impasse.
As they drew near the logjam, Davey saw Sadie being jostled a bit out of the corner of his eye and wondered if he ought to offer her his arm. He had the advantage of being tall enough to be seen in the crowd, but her relatively small stature wasn't doing her any favors, and the congested sidewalks, slick with rain, were more precarious than usual due to the push and shove of the crowd pressing in from all sides.
But would such a gesture be welcomed? And would it be too forward of him to ask?
A man shouldered past Sadie from behind, causing her to stumble, and Davey pushed aside his reservations.
"Sadie," he said, offering her his arm, "do you…?"
She took it, giving him a smile. "This is quite the crush of people, isn't it? It seems we all were caught equally unprepared for the rain, and now must pay the price for our negligence!"
"We could have avoided the worst of it if we'd taken an umbrella," Davey pointed out.
"But what fun would that have been?" came her cheeky response. "It's much more interesting to take chances every once in a while, especially when the stakes are as low as merely getting caught in the rain - which, I might add, is often great fun under the right circumstances."
"But being soaked can lead to catching a cold," he insisted. "And it's easier to slip and fall when the streets are wet and you're in a hurry. Les got a concussion once when he was only six because he was running in the rain and lost his footing in front of our apartment. There was blood everywhere, and he had to get stitches."
Sadie laughed a little, seemingly amused by the grimness in his tone. "You certainly have a way of putting a damper on things, Davey."
It had been meant for a teasing, lighthearted remark, and he could tell that there was no censure in it...but it was also an indication that he was probably wearying her with his anxious tendencies and ought to back off.
"I started looking out for Les almost as soon as he was born," he said, attempting to soften the severity of his previous remarks. "I guess the overprotective older brother instinct is hard to shake."
Great choice of words, Davey, he thought as soon as the statement had left his mouth. Because that's exactly how you want her to see you.
Glumly, he stuck his free hand in his pocket and ducked his head, wishing, not for the first time, that he could be a different kind of person, the kind who could simply enjoy being caught in the rain with the girl he was secretly sweet on instead of feeling the need to point out the potential pitfalls of the situation. He couldn't recall a time where he'd ever felt completely carefree like that, for anxiousness had been a presence in his life for as long as he could remember, but that didn't mean he didn't ache to be normal in moments like these when he knew that his irrational worries were making him come across as uptight and stiffly disagreeable.
Before his thoughts could descend any further into self-deprecation, the crowd began to thin out, and soon he and Sadie were walking freely again, unhindered by the press of people behind and before.
"Much better!" the landlord's daughter exclaimed, sounding relieved to be out of the congestion.
Davey made a sound of agreement, keenly aware that her fingers were still curled around his arm. He wasn't sure what he ought to do; Sadie seemed to have no objections to walking this way, but his assistance was clearly no longer needed, so perhaps she was simply too polite to shrug him off, and he ought to be the one to initiate it.
As he was pondering this, he caught sight of their reflection in a shop window, and was struck by how very like a pair they might have appeared to a casual observer passing by. Perhaps it was the way Sadie walked beside him, as though their closeness was the most natural thing in the world, or perhaps it was because her fingers seemed to fit perfectly into the crook of his arm, but something about the picture looked so simple and easy that it gave him pause.
He wondered if she could feel how threadbare his coat was. He'd had it for several seasons, and it was still serviceable but faded and wearing thin. She worked with fabric constantly at the tailor's - surely she would notice. Her question of whether or not he'd want to wear something warmer before they'd set out on their errand had been innocently posed and kindly meant, but it had also driven home the reality that, while they may have been neighbors and classmates and friends, there were certain intractable ways in which their worlds were entirely different.
And he realized that, while a casual observer might have easily mistaken them for a couple, anyone taking a closer look would notice immediately that this was not - could not - be the case. The frayed patches of his cap, his scuffed and worn-out shoes, his clean but faded coat, did not belong next to the fine fabric of her cape or her tastefully jaunty hat or the tiny pearl pendant at her throat. The picture didn't fit upon closer inspection. They were two people from two different worlds, drawn together in this moment only for the sake of practical considerations. Once those considerations became unnecessary, the connection would be too, and they would once again be merely Sadie, the landlord's daughter of comfortable means, and Davey, the practically penniless newsie who lived downstairs.
Their arrival at the post office brought an end to his rumination, and Sadie went inside to conduct her business while he remained on the street, watching the pedestrians hurry past. It was a familiar feeling, the sensation of being surrounded by people but still feeling completely alone, and Davey instinctively drew his arms around himself for warmth, pulling his threadbare coat closer as the rain continued to fall from the gray skies overhead.
A/N: We'll pick up here in the next chapter (and I promise that our next installment will be a lot more fun than this one), but until then, I'd love to hear your thoughts/reactions to Sadie's disclosures and/or anything else that stuck out to you!
Also, QueenAnnabeth18 asked a good question in a review of the previous chapter, and I thought I'd respond to it here in case anyone else is interested in knowing the answer.
Question: Just curious, do you have an outline of how long this story is going to be, or are you just going to keep writing chapters until you find a good place to stop?
Answer: Yes, I do work off of an outline for this story! I personally feel that I write best when I have a detailed plan for how I'm going to get from point A to point B, so I don't start posting multi-chapter fics without first having a plan for how I am going to finish them. There is a definite end to this tale and a road map for getting there, it's just a matter of finding the time, motivation, and inspiration to write it all down and edit it to my satisfaction.
My outline, in fact, is due for its final update/revision sometime in the next month or so (I periodically go through and make adjustments/cut things out), and after that, the details of the story will be more or less firmly set all the way to the end. Since the timing of this revision dovetails nicely with this question coming up, I thought I'd ask anyone who's still reading to share (if you'd like to) your answer to the following question, which will help me as I make these final decisions on what to prioritize.
Whose plot line are you most excited to see come to completion?
A) Race's
B) Davey and Sadie's
C) Jack and Katherine's
I will obviously be addressing all three, but there's still some flexibility as to the specific percentage of page time that will be given to each, and while I am going to stick to my plan as to how the story will play out, I do want to keep in mind what's most exciting and engaging for my readers so that I can try to make my storytelling as enjoyable as possible for you. :)
Thanks QueenAnnabeth18 for the question, and thanks to everyone who read this note! Please feel free to submit your feedback if you feel so inclined. And while we're on the subject, thanks for being here and for sticking with this story. I appreciate you all very much! :)
