Author's Note : To the reader in Germany, by now I'm morbidly curious why you've visited this chapter 27 times in less than 2 weeks.

· · · · · · ·

—let's destroy the world together. We'll build a better one from the pieces. Don't you think that is the ultimate way to get back at Her, Dugradigdu? —

—Valgaav, I promise you. One day, you and I will stand at the top of a better world, none of those idiot devils or useless gods and fleeting mortals. We'll all be immortal chimeras—

—Valteira, your mother and father won't come home. The goldens were in the western ridge, and ...—

· · · · · · ·

Everyone in the family (but himself) worried their ears off when Filia disappeared one morning. After confirming that fox people do shed hair more often when stressed, Val asked Claire where she'd gone. Apparently, Filia had found herself another distressed supernatural. Of course she'd giddyup on a whim.

Since Filia was clearly occupied with usual business, Val had seen no need to do anything but carry on his daily routine. Everyone else in the family disagreed, so of course the moment she got back, Jillas burst into his private lesson to drag him in a flurry of fur and happiness.

The Siephied temple was packed with curiosities : lots of brown humans and beast folk mulled around the hall, to the point of stuffing it. Amelia's fellow priestesses urged them out through separate doors, dispersing the crowd into silence.

Jillas sniffed out Filia quickly. Slipping through the crowd, he led Val into the core hall of the temple. Most people had already vacated it, leaving Filia a perfect echo chamber for her debate with ... was that Luna?

Val and Jillas stopped at the entrance door, both caught by surprise. Filia, who always held Luna in high regard, looked and sounded anything but regarding. Also, she was picking a fight with the aforementioned Luna, AKA the most frightening human in the world. Sure, she smirked and slouched against Siephied's statue like she had no care in the world, but that was only because she didn't need physical posture when she had an astral body to rage with.

A big green wolfish thing hunched to the side of the furious ladies, he noticed Jillas and Val first.

"Miss Luna, that's the other dragon?" he asked, pointing at them.

Luna's head rolled back, one red eye stared down on him through a curtain of hair. "Yeah. Comes with Frilly's own pet dog too!"

"Don't you call mister Jillas that! He is family."

"Uh, uh, Frilly. I've heard what you call Zelas's clown. Garbage's a lot less nice than pet," Luna said.

"That's a insult over a creature so strong I have literary no other way to get some leverage. It's not a control method, it's frustration," Filia said.

"Oh, so you agree that a little assholish behavior's fine with criminals. Consider me keeping Spot in place as community service. Fits his messy past, right, Rock Boy?" Luna said, which the nearby Zelgadis honored with irritated grumbling.

"You didn't even know that when you put that chain on him!" Filia snarled.

"Nah, but it does make a difference for the better, right? He hasn't broken a single law since." Luna patted the green thing on the head.

"That may be true this once. Next time you pick a beast person off the street, they could be an innocent and you wouldn't care, would you?"

"Such hatred for me over a hypothesis. Very noble, Frilly."

Jillas flattened his ears and stayed put, but Val didn't fear Luna. He grew his wings and launched at Filia. Her expression switched from cold resentment to motherly calm. Opening her arms, she caught Val and embraced him. Her eyes stayed on Luna.

"We'll talk about this later," Filia said over Val's shoulder.

"Good, gives me some time to get earplugs." Luna sauntered off with the green thing close behind, like she had no care in the world.

As she moved away, Filia's tension lessened, along with a strange magical tremor. The lady in white, ghostly around them, indicating it was something similar to herself : a godly command. Whether conscious or not, Luna's flow tried influencing Filia's mind. Oddly enough, both of them resisted it, which was why it didn't come true.

Val didn't understand. The lady in white was welcome to him, why didn't Filia fall naturally into it?

She didn't like Luna, so that was why ... should he be liking the lady in white?

Nah, there was nothing to say. All was well.

Knowing all this, he didn't didn't need to ask what got Filia upset, but it was expected.

"What's the matter, mom?" he asked.

"It's ... Val, stay far from Luna, okay?"

"Where you been?" Jillas asked.

Filia leaned down put an arm around him, pulling him into the hug. Jillas squeaked when she squeezed too hard, so she loosened her grip.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," she muttered. "I thought we'd be back within an hour, but I had to teleport a whole village here."

"We understand, gunmoll," Jillas said, putting a hand on her back. "At least you did come back!"

"I'll try to keep doing that, promise," she said with a weak smile.

Filia set Val down to push Zelgadis into an unoccupied antechamber. Then she grabbed a woman with spiky white hair and pushed her in there too. She closed the door and stayed outside, while Jillas questioned her on what exactly had happened.

Just then, a familiar blue and white blur had just passed by.

Ignoring everyone, Claire beelined for young man in a weird white jacket, who has spiky hair to rival that woman from a moment ago. He sat against the wall, eyes closed as if asleep, but too posed to be. When Claire stopped before him, he looked up and smiled.

"You're ... " Lyos's voice trailed off, his eyes widening in wonder.

"Well, now that you're here, we might as well get along," Claire said with a shrug.

"You better have an explanation on why you didn't want us to come. We were ... holy crap." His face drew from mild irritation to awe, to a weird twist, and then uneasiness, and finally a grin.

"Okay, why not. I can deal with this," Lyos muttered as he pulled a hand over his face. "Anything else that I need to know about telepathy? Oh ... right."

He stood up and followed her closely. It wasn't quite mimicry, more like every motion they made accounted for the other. She opened the door, he closed it, like they'd never been anything but this symbiosis.

Five seconds later, Claire burst back into. "Orun! Don't!"

Filia's tail popped out and she blocked Claire from opening her door.

The two would-be dragons had a staredown of something, which ended with Claire's defeated sigh. "Fine."

By the time the door opened again, the hall had drained of everyone, while Amelia had returned.

Zelgadis stepped out first. With his usual look, it was hard to tell whether he was more severe than usual.

"And?" Filia asked.

"It's crazy," Zelgadis said. "I don't know what possessed Lina to agree with this. Then again, I've asked that many times before."

"And?" Filia asked, digging her fingers in and out of her cloak.

"We'll go along with it. I'd like to say it's because I trust Lina to know what she's doing, but to be honest, I don't. I do understand that if we refuse, we will be in deep trouble. Right now, Rangort covered for us by preventing the other gods and dragons from finding out about us. If he stops, they will find us."

"So the god're putting a gun to our heads, eh?" Jillas said.

Zelgadis nodded. "Pretty much. Our best chance is to wait, send an army where ever Rangort wants and hope Sailoon remains unnoticed. Claire, Ragradia, whatever you are, you're playing a fatal game. I will write what I know on a scroll for Filia to find in case of emergency."

"Is there any way I and Luna can lock the gods out with any certainty, or at least improve our fortitude?" Filia asked Orun.

"I'm sorry, but I know too little about this kind of magic," Orun said, shaking her head sadly.

"Rangort knows. He should have prepared everyone involved starting years ago," Zelgadis said. "If Vrabazard or Valwin had come across Lyos and Luna, it would have been over. They shielded themselves with that cloud without grasping what they did and that is the only reason those two aren't on our roof yet."

"Speaking of looking for people," Amelia said, "Miss Claire, I left you a note, didn't you find it?"

Claire shrugged. "I did, but Sylphiel is alright. There was no need to arrange for her teleportation back, she is in safe claws."

"Claws?" Orun asked. "Who is Sylphiel?"

"An acquaintance," Claire said. "Xelloss arranged for us to have an insider in the enemy's movement. She is with Milgazia right now."

"What? How?" Filia snapped. "You let him mess with miss Sylphiel?"

Another shrug from Claire. "I don't know whether he planned it at all or whether he winged something, but it may be useful. Let it be."

Off course Claire would say something that careless. She was a god.

· · · · · · ·

— nowadays, I can say she was beautiful. Ragradia. I'd still kill her, off course. She feeds on peaceful feelings and I just happen to like battle, whether it's for the miasma or not, but I'd do it with more style. Maybe I'd tie her to a human soul, once I figured out how to sever power like th—

· · · · · · ·

It was just fine that Claire spent all of the next day teaching Lyos this and that, because that one memory of his dream tickled Val's long forgotten murder instincts.

Killing Ragradia ... Gaav ...

Val didn't feel like killing Claire, in fact, something told him he needed her alive. Yet it somehow appealed to him, because it was something Gaav wanted.

Or rather, it was about altering the nature of astral beings ...

A whipping hit on his desk startled him. Under the glare of his teacher, Val tried forcing his mind back to his work, but to no avail. Transcribing old texts, math, one way or another it kept bringing him back to the topic of transmigrating divine power into another form ...

"Sir, was wondering about gods. Since holy magic became available to this land again, why aren't the gods doing more to help us?"

"Are they really gods?" his teacher asked.

Val tilted his head. This was already not going the he expected, so he just shrugged.

"We understand gods to be protective entities opposite of the harmful devils, but where the devils corrupt, the gods have yet to bother to reveal a unified doctrine. It's been eight years now and none have come forth. Are they busy elsewhere? Who knows? Explanations are as diverse as they were while the barrier still stood."

"Gods feed on faith," Val said.

"I've heard that theory, yes. If that is true, that makes them more of a top predator than a spiritual leader, doesn't it?"

He nodded quickly. "And if they die, that's not our concern, is it?"

"Perhaps. Magic certainly has processed in their absence, it may well be one day they are a moot point in the game of us versus devils. But for the world as a whole, currently it is better that they exist than that they don't."

"Wouldn't it be better if neither the gods nor devils were the way they are now? There wouldn't be any more war, would there?"

"That is wistful thinking. While it is true that devils can worsen corruption, or plant the seed for it, there is more to a conflict than the beginning and the result of it," his teacher said. She opened a book and shoved it before him. It depicted the recently constructed tanks and bombs, and the way they used shamanistic principles for fuel. "With devils and gods gone, humanity would go on regardless to breed war. There are other sources of energy, starting with the spirits of nature."

"Yeah," Val said. "Mom keeps saying that too. Sometimes devils are even helpful, even if they don't do it for the right reasons, and humans do awful things all on their own. Mom says that we should help each other anyway cause that's the only reason we are alive. We make the world better step by step."

"If that didn't come from gods, you don't need to bother with them either, do you?"

"Yeah ... so, about this triangle thing, how does that work again?"

That was all he said, but the unfinished thought went further. Sometimes, it didn't matter how hard one tried, because the gods and devils could destroy it at a whim. And sometimes, the gods and devils destroyed themselves. The entire system needed a revamp. If they could be remade to serve instead, it would solve a lot.

Just like he himself had to be remade, but he wasn't sure into what. There should have been directions by now, yet the lady in white feathers was too silent.

· · · · · · ·

That evening, Val arrived at the smith shop to meet up with Filia. She'd skipped work, instead helping to remove something from Luna's necklace.

He wasn't allowed further in than the display room, but the scent of scorching flesh was unmistakable. He slipped through a storage room, following it.

By now, the memories of past lives didn't faze him anymore : people had burned in wars, on pyres in times of peace. The last time he had smelled it was in Jillas's old village. He had been Valgaav, who had not cared. Val didn't have to either.

They were in the east wing.

Luna didn't scream like everyone else, but an unearthly tremor rippled through the flow. Too proud to show pain, or perhaps she used tricks to get around it. The flow shifted often, probably a healing spell. The closed door muffled the voices, but Gravos's thundering, "I gave up, I couldn't get that thing out with the forges of hell!" stood out clear enough.

When the door swung open, Val ducked behind a heavy armor. Gravos careened out. Palu followed right after, a dejected look on his face. Once, Val would have gone after him to make him feel better, but that didn't really matter anymore. Besides, Orun followed them. As they disappeared into the next room, he heard her start one of those typical encouragement thingies.

More interesting was what he could hear and see in the reflections of the shields opposite of the door. The room was dark, lit only by fire, but it was enough.

"For the last time, stop talking like that to my family!" Filia snapped.

"Why?"

With Luna, she had never been on her guard, had she? Val knew the feeling, it was much like the gods turning their back on his people. The goldens suddenly on their doorstep with a war declaration. Evil hurt the worst when it comes from the ones you trust.

They rambled on long after the others had left the room, verbally circling around each other. Both of them desperate to make the other get it. This was also so, so familiar. He'd talked like that with many a priest in the past; they'd died at the end of the conversation though. At his hands.

"This isn't okay. He's a person just like you, you can't treat him like he's lesser. If he did commit crimes, hand him to judges or roll him into Sailoon's reformation program." Filia was shrill from a dry throat by now. "Mister Dilgear, don't you have anything to say?"

"Not about forgiveness, Frilly. I just like pets and there's lawful benefits to keeping this one." Luna's voice never changed from the casual chit-chat tone.

"This is abuse. Even if we were talking about pets, you shouldn't torment them!"

Luna swung one leg over the other and smirked, like she'd just reached a point she'd angled for.

"You're one to talk about lousy relationships. What was it again? Oh Valgaav, what can I do to redeem myself before you?" Luna said. "Because I feel sooooooo bad for that crime that happened when I wasn't born yet and oh woe you're so sad and tragic that totally deserves all my heart. Get off my back, Frilly. You're the most codependent person in the damn castle and happy that way."

A suffocating silence fell over the room, none the least for Val. It was okay remembering Valgaav when he killed strangers, less so when he hurt her.

"I'll admit that was ... it made me do stupid things. That doesn't mean I can't tell when I see it happen to others," Filia finally said.

"Is it? Spot, you mind being with me?"

"No."

"Frilly, did you mind Valgaav's abuse?"

"I didn't like what he did, but—"

"There's the but! You thought he had a right. I've never put a sword in Spot's hand, pointed it at his stomach and pushed, telling him it's his fault I was killing him. But Valgaav, oh, he wasn't going to kill you with a mere sword. He threw good old Ultimate Evil at you. And yet you wanted his forgiveness where he should fall to his knees and beg it from you. If you can go easy on Valgaav because of his sob story, maybe I should give you a sob story of my own. I'll bawl a bit and then we can go back to more fun chit chat."

"You don't understand. How could you? Do you even believe in rights?"

"Give me some empirical evidence and I'll consider it," Luna said, swinning a leg over the other as she fell down in a chair. She leaned her elbow on the edges and held open her hands. "Come on. Where's the evidence?"

Filia prepared to walk out, but Luna grabbed her long hair and janked her back, so she stood aside of the chair and had to lean down.

"You were attracted to the idea of him, the powerful pretty bad boy. Just like my little Spot thinks I'm charming," Luna whispered. "I've seen it in your nightmares. But you didn't, cause you're ignoring it. Spot at least knows why he's really here."

"So what if I was? I didn't choose that, I bet Dilgear didn't either. My choice was to kill him. It's also my choice not to be bound with monsters. Not my Elder, not Xelloss and not Valgaav. If you stand by your behavior, there is nothing left for us to talk about." She pulled her hair loose and marched out of the door.

Val fled without anyone seeing him, his heart racing as all the pieces fell together.

The power of gods and in their shadow the name Valgaav. Something tried pushing the association away, but he didn't allow that anymore.

That night, he dreamed again.

· · · · · · ·

— you can love existence now, can't you?" Valteira asked as they walked down a mountain path, the burning question finally out. They had spent the last five days dodging devils and dragons alike. Now they'd finally arrived at Gaav's lair.

"Yeah. Minor perk, no negative points. I'm pleasantly surprised, to be honest. The gods never felt like they enjoyed existing, they just did it cause they had to. But this? Hell yes, I love plenty now. But it's not that different from before, you know." Gaav stretched his arms, though he possessed no muscles. Or did he?

"Don't you feel bad about the past? You did a lot of awful things."

"Are you asking me whether I got a conscience? Don't be ridiculous," Gaav said. "I just want to live, that is all that changed. Well, that does make me a new person, but we always had the ability to like concepts, if not things. Devils are desperate to deny this because it clashes so loudly with the need to destroy everything. Yet we have names, we have identities. That's a preference right there that devils cannot go without. I've always liked war, I liked the aesthetic of manliness ... Dolphin, she likes the sea and femininity, and Zelas, she likes living things and even social structures. The bitch has an actual pack."

Valteira didn't know what to make of that. Then again, he didn't know what to make of this world at all. When the gods condoned genocide, really, why would it surprise him to learn the devils weren't what they should be either?

Gaav droned on as he kicked open a heavy wooden door. "It's a handicap, you know. Imagine how powerful a devil army would be if they could alter their form in battle as easily as they claim. They brag about how they aren't bound to form, but they can't exploit the choice to change. And guess what? Some of them figured out the world doesn't add up."

The place they entered was thick with magic, somehow he could see it now. "What is this? Why does it look so weird?"

"Ah, another perk of being a chimera," Gaav said as he knocked on the walls. "We can have homes without denying something about ourselves. One of the best things about that is I can craft non-sentient astral constructions. Walls, if you wanna be simple about it. It's why neither gods nor devils can track me when I'm injured and leaking. But more importantly, it's a good place to hide my army."

He clacked his tongue, and a light went on. Fire on the physical plane, and a bright cloud on the astral. Now Valteira saw them : devils surrounded them.

A green haired guy with blue skin, a woman with red hair, an elderly fisherman, a gruff general and a perky orange haired boy stepped ahead and bowed to Gaav.

"Hey, guys. I got him. Valgaav, meet Kanzel, Mazenda, Rashat, Raltaak and Enlys. Except for Rashat and Raltaak, they're all devils who want to live. Together, we're going to change this world."

· · · · · · ·

He had to keep going down the path Gaav had set him on. It was the one thing Val ul Copt, Valteira and Valgaav agreed on.

First, he had to fill the hollow so the lady in white became stronger. Not entirely, the wrong people would notice if he suddenly had a full astral body. Just enough so she had power, while he still had his shield.

The lady herself was supposed to do that, but she was ill, so he had to do it for her. There was nothing to say to anyone else. They didn't get that the gods were tools to be used. It was important that he himself, as the one who did understand, would have some real leverage.

The potential sources of holy magic were aplenty : Lyos, Luna, Claire and Filia.

None of their types were entirely similar. Filia's holiness as a channel was the least personal, and not affected by the pillar as they were similar functions : suction devices. He had no need for that type of power.

Claire's type of power contained knowledge and complex mental facets. Val had an inkling he needed that, but he couldn't recall what for.

Luna and Lyos had subtly different types of power. Ragradia's proverbial skeletal had gone into sealing Lei Magnus, so Lyos had power he could only indirectly manifest. Luna's power was purer, because it was the actual remnant of Siephied.

Attacking her was risky though, and there was one other potential source. Filia had severed a tiny piece of Valwin once, that was how she'd astrally traveled.

· · · · · · ·

The next morning as she was setting the breakfast table, he asked, "Mom, isn't it dangerous to walk around with a little piece of a god in you if that light turns on again?"

She tensed up, as expected. "I don't know. The piece hasn't merged with me, I doubt it's dangerous."

"I heard Claire and Lyos talk about how Lyos wanted to go to the gods because of it. I'm afraid of that, mom. If you aren't you anymore, you'll leave us!"

"Oh, Val." She leaned over the table and gently ran her hand over his head. "Don't worry, there's a fusion shield all over Sailoon. Even if it happens again, I remember exactly what Xelloss did to lock it out. I will teach others to use fusion vessels that way. I promise, I'll be okay."

"If you say so. But wouldn't it be safer if you gave it to me? I bet cause of my hollow shadow thing, it'll be just as invisible as everything about me! And I can use that power to keep us all safe if dragons come, then I won't have to transform anymore!" As he spoke, he stood on his chair.

Filia chuckled, but it wasn't as friendly as she meant to convey. Val saw.

"I'll think about it."

· · · · · · ·

The next day, Filia decided to give the wind god's fragment to Orun. So, she didn't trust him when she should. As his mother and a good person, it was her role to help him, her child.

Instead, that weird woman got it because she already had godly attention anyway and a greater spiritual power. Supposedly, this allowed her to keep the power from merging with her soul and she was more likely to stay in Sailoon than Filia. Zelgadis had made it clear Filia was to go to the location later to help Lina.

It was all fine and well that things went as they should, but that bit of godly power was so convenient and it had slipped through his fingers. He wasn't even allowed into the temple to look as they transferred it.

As he waited outside, Luna and her pet dropped by.

"Hey, kid. They started already?"

Val nodded. "Door's closed."

"Not for me," she said.

In true Inverse style, she just burned the lock and the locking spell. Having little else to do, Val trailed after her.

"Hey, stay back, your hollow's obnoxious," Luna said. Her green pet winced, then gave Val a surprised look.

Was something supposed to happen? Val stayed back just in case.

Luna frowned at Val, but shrugged it off and made her way into the inner sanctum. The place shone in silvery light, and once Luna stepped in, the resonance of godliness.

"I can't believe you're wasting this power, Frilly," Luna called.

A telltale groan echoed out, more dragon than human. Filia appeared seconds later. "Are you just here to complain?"

"Yes. You're wasting my work," Luna said.

"No, I am not. None of the things we learned are leaving my head. All I'm losing is a tiny bit of power I could do without before, and miss Orun could use it to protect her people," Filia snapped.

"Shooting yourself in the foot again. What about astral projecting?"

"I didn't forget about that either!"

They went on for this a little bit, both of them distracted enough that Val could steal a peak inside the holy hall. Orun sat crosslegged in the center, below a cloud of light. Claire and Lyos were there too, containing the holiness. Fusion magic shielded the whole thing. Ah, they used a life law circle. So, those existed in this world too?

Hmm ... this looked simple enough. Similar flow technique as in the Black World, safe for a few key differences.

Someone grabbed him before he could see more. "Val, we told you to stay outside! You might affect the magic per accident!" Filia said.

"Sorry mom," he said, dipping his head a little while looking up. Puppy dog eyes always worked for her.

"Just go outside, okay? Don't listen to Luna."

"Hey!" Luna called from down the hall. "I had nothing to do with him coming in!"

"You set a bad example!" Filia hollered back.

Luna and Filia's interaction stayed that way : short bursts of tension before they went their own way and pretended nothing was wrong.

It was convenient, though. Val wouldn't feel bad about stealing from Luna, this way. He just needed to know how. Time to dream.

· · · · · · ·

— "How does it feel to kill a god?" Valgaav asked.

"I'll show you. Mind, this may be blurry, but it should transfer enough of the feeling," Gaav said. He gave him another tiny fragment of himself, which carried the memory.

Gaav didn't so much actively kill Ragradia as he was in the middle of her suicidal attack. They killed each other, but not in the way Gaav wanted. Knowing he'd die and be degraded without achieved anything was a bitter way to end. He loved war, but this was the worst kind of victory he could achieve. Even defeat would have been better than this humiliation.

Valgaav snapped out of the memory.

"Not what you expected, eh?"

"No ... I thought it would feel great."

"If it had been up to me, I'd have its head partially aware in my castle. Ironically, I wouldn't bother with such trivialities anymore. We seek the same thing now and Ragradia was an excellent opponent."

"Keeping the head alive? How is that possible?"

"It's a metaphor," Gaav said. "Astral beings are mind, sure, but there still is anatomy to this form. The power they use to fight isn't the same as the power that hosts their identity or binds them as persons. Let me show you ..."

· · · · · · ·

Val woke up with bloodthirst in his veins and blood across his face.

The sun shone into the room through bright curtains, Elena sang in the kitchen and he smelled eggs with bacon. If he came down now with murder on his mind, they'd be suspicious. Even non-astral beings could detect an emotion this strong. Val fought to switch back on a more appropriate mindset. He was to be a child, innocent and happy.

Clutching a hand across his head, he forced the irrelevant pain to the front in hope of getting back the inconspicuous childlike persona. The pain had to matter because the child would feel it, but he couldn't will it.

It didn't work. He climbed out of bed and peered into the mirror; he had grown into his adult human self. His hair was drenched with blood, just above his hairline the skin had cracked like his dragon horn his tried to grow out. Bit of black protruded form the skin.

"Damnit ... " The Valgaav from the memories had a horn, right? He'd identified too much, his body had tried to comply, but the devil powers that Valgaav had possessed weren't his.

He dropped back on the bed, buried his face in his hands and pretended breathing was the sole point of life. Filia used that trick at times after dealing with particularly troublesome customers.

A heavy knock on the door made him flinch.

"Val, are you coming? Breakfast is almost ready! We have pancakes!" Molly called.

Val hedged his "Comin'" with groans and draconic squeaks, a poor disguise for his heavier voice. Molly didn't wonder, fortunately.

"Okay, see you down!"

It took him another ten minutes to stop thinking about killing gods, until he found the trick : he couldn't kill them messily. Putting all his thoughts to getting holy power to fill the hollow, that stilled the need to destroy them a little.

He turned back into a child, switched on the fitting happy mindset and went down.

· · · · · · ·

Luna got herself employment down in the city as a waitress. Nobody protected her and she knew no complex magic. Didn't even hang out with any magicians.

Val sought her out one late evening, when she was just heading home. Off course she exited through the dark ally with only a single lantern; she had her pride as the invincible woman with the veil of fragility.

Just as she closed the door, he stepped into the ally. "Hey, Luna."

She turned slowly and placed a hand on her hips. "What'dya want?"

"I want to talk about gods. Is it true that none of them care for people outside of food?"

"Late night crisis of existence? You're taking after your mom. Yeah, it's true. That what you wanted to hear?"

"No."

"Too bad. No transcendental wisdom to pursue in this world or the others," Luna said, more sharply now. "Gods flow, that's it. Now scram."

"It's not good enough," he said. "Luna, you're the Knight of Siephied, right? Ever wondered what you'd be like if you were just human instead?"

She faltered. One might have missed it if one didn't know what she was like most of the time; just the hesitation of her answer, the slight tilt of her head.

"I guess my life would be minus the hassle that brought me here. Why?"

"I'm making that happen."

He grabbed her throat and pushed her against the wall. Luna's weak human form wasn't a match for his draconic strength, her holy power trashed blindly in his void.

His own astral form grabbed her power. With thought alone, he recreated the tunnel to steal her power. Bit by bit he tore it off, swallowing it into his own soul. Luna's fury was easily ignored ...

No.

Fifty red eyes projected in the ally, spinning wildly till they saw him. Red nerves connected with Luna's main body.

Now she saw him.

Oh hell no.

Luna was astrally blind, but nothing stopped her from projecting. Four pointed tentacles manifested around him, two duginto his back. Luna smirked.

— tip of Xelloss's staff went through his arm, right through his primary muscle, and it twisted it and twisted and —

Val dropped her and tore loose. The other two tentacles cut at his legs, so he grew his wings and flew up. As he crawled onto the roof, energy burned on his tail. If not for the distorting hollow around him, he would have lost a wing. Now, the shockwave just threw him off balance. He collided hard with the ground, cracking a wing under himself.

"What the hell are you doing?" Luna said, her eerily calm.

What indeed?

The stolen godliness flowed into waiting caverns, and connected a space greater than his mind could encompass before.

— that's how devils are, sadistic by need," Gaav said. "Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's pretty self destructive in the end. Even if Shabranigdu won't vaporize every atom in the world, if they win all life ends sooner or later until they themselves starve. Won't that be funny? Then there would be nothing left to destroy the world —

— he hated waiting, couldn't stand this. He could pass the barrier if Gaav could do it, exploit the same miscalculation that didn't recognize devil chimeras, but then he'd betray Gaav's trust. He wasn't bound to perfect obedience like Rashat and Raltaak were, he chose to ... and it was difficult for the first time to obey. Ever since that infernal girl had cast a spell with the power of the Lord of Nightmares, everything was going wrong —

— he was gone. Annihilated. Gaav Flare didn't work anymore. He forced the words out of Rashat, that it was by the machinations of Fibrizo ... Fibrizo was gone too, but there had been others involved. Xellos and Lina Inverse ... he'd make them —

— I have an offer to you, said the strange thing without astral shape. Help me with this, and —

— so the gods from other worlds were just as callous as those from this world —

— he shouldn't have summoned his dragon blood, it conflicted with the devil energy, but there was no other way to get an advantage on Xelloss, he was just playing around—

—Almayce couldn't be trusted, off course. He was a god.—

—He'd fix it, just like Gaav wanted. A world without gods and devils.—

—almost funny how none of those would have happened if Xelloss had acted like the devil he should be and let those rocks crush her, but Dugradigdu and Volphied had no sense of humor to spare. They didn't have much in the way of mental details, not even an appreciation for irony. That was okay. Simpler. —

—there is Lina again, getting in the way. She will never understand, but now he knows all that Dugradigdu and Volphied know, his past hatred for her seems small and petty in light of the true culprit, the Lord of Nightmares—

—there she is again, that little lady who doesn't know any better—

Val opened his eyes to an unknown chandelier on a yellow ceiling. Sailoon's palace? The temple? Where was he?

—she looked up at the star filled sky above the massacre and realized they were untouched and uncaring. She could travel between the stars, but even she could not command them. That meant Dark Star could not either. Did they realize this? Once they had, but now—

—he saw her look up, wondered whether she liked what she saw, and then she asked him that one question that changed everything—

—no, it wasn't a change, he'd already known, but forgotten—

—once, I fought to preserve existence. Now, I just fight for the sake of fighting, despite my hatred for it... I hate all this yet on some level I like our war—

—it's not fair that you can hate this much, but I cannot love, because you always had more satisfaction and fulfillment —

—maybe that's the problem, you can still enjoy certain things, but not everything. It is unfair, Dugradigdu, she said—

—look at them, they don't care for our grand purpose. Mine want to fight, yours want to fight, it's no longer about void or existence—

—we're the same—

His mother was at his side. On instinct, he pushed up from the bed and reached for her, holding her hand — Her breath took in sharply and she pushed him away. Fear filled her miasma.

—she struggles, but she's too weak to do anything. Hah, as if her death would be enough to atone! Wouldn't it be perfect if a golden dragon sets loose this power? Still struggling, so much fear and despair, she's begging now, but her hand is on the key to end it all and I have her unleash the seal — stop! — and the power above unfolds — the aura of Dark Star engulfs us, I sense it, she senses it and realizes what I and she have done, and she goes catatonic and doesn't matter anymore —

How could his mother not matter? Who ever that had been — him — was a complete idiot.

The memories were pushed away, by him, by the lady of feathers. He was to act like the loving child because ... because ... they had to believe he was harmless.

This wasn't right, he shouldn't keep secrets from his mother.

But there was nothing to tell anyone.

He knew the emotion of guilt should, would have been there, but it was cut away. Right now, Luna watched, Claire watched, and his emotional landscape had to be innocent.

Val stood up, wanting to comfort his mother, but someone grabbed him.

"Ooh, you gotta tell me how you get someone this afraid," Luna said, throwing him back down on the couch. She turned to Filia. "It's quite something."

His mother looked away. "Not now, miss Luna."

"I'll hold you to that later then, Frilly," Luna said.

"Mom?" Val asked.

"Yes?"

"Sorry," he said. He couldn't even tell why he was sorry. About hurting Luna? That his mother feared him? Or just for himself, because she pushed him away.

He's known once, when he was only Val ul Copt.

When Val ul Copt could still believe he wasn't a diversion program.

But Val ul Copt hadn't been anyone who could taste emotions, nor would he have hurt any friend of his mother.

He couldn't tell anyone, just like he couldn't will his heart to stop beating. The need to be silent lay deeper than anything this version of himself wanted. He was just a surface concept. That same deeper command would make all his heart go silent too, until it wouldn't matter anymore. There was another heart, another instinct, that wanted other things.

It required that Filia trust him.

He had to, somehow. So he had to lie. He could combine that with hoping his mother would be alright.

"I'm really sorry I scared you, mom," he said, holding out a hand. "I'm not going to hurt you. I only attacked her because she hurt me first. I just wanted to ask her about what the other gods are like cause I understand Claire, and she did something that hurt."

Perfection. Filia's doubtful look went from him to Luna.

"Don't be ridiculous. If that's true, why—" Luna started.

"You astrally attack people over little things," Filia said, fading disbelief in her emotions. Acceptance replaced it. "Miss Lina's not afraid out of exaggerated memories, is she? You've done it to me too, and others."

Luna shrugged. "So I like to poke people. I didn't do it with him. But let's say I did : tearing away part of my power is overkill."

"But we can't really verify whether he did that, can we?" Filia said. "You know Val has trouble controlling himself when Valteira shines through. You shouldn't have provoked him!"

"I didn't, Filia. He is lying!" Luna said. For the first time, she raised her voice.

"Val has never lied to me before. He kept Claire from me for a while, but he never lied." She left the rest unspoken, but even that silence riled Luna up.

"I'm not the one with a record of violence," Luna said, taking a step forward.

His mother stood tall, and though she got angry, she didn't lash out. Two contained storms that refused to rise. "We will talk later. I'm bring Val home now."

· · · · · · ·

She teleported him home, and left after putting him into bed. It never occurred to her that his clothing hadn't been torn, like they would have been.

Not interested in sleep, he stood up the moment she was out of the door.

It had been a long time since he had been a chimera, he'd missed the ability to project his clothes, if anything. Bringing that power to the front, he projected the first to come to his mind : Night Dragon Volphied.

Her full form and fragmented had been buried in a separate compartment within the hollow, now finally connected to his main mind. Given godly power — her sibling's power — he could project her in the same way astral beings projected themselves. It was the perfect adaption for one with such a different composition. Val pulled the curtains closed just as her form began to glow.

A human woman on the physical plane, she wore white, but she also was black as the night, great as the firmament. Like him. Claire had unlocked memories for him when she was still a bible, but not these. Either she had not known, or chosen to pass them over. He poured more of the holy power into these memories until all the stars had become a single light, and his heart of night lived again.

"Hello, my prophet. I am Night Dragon Volphied."

And then nothing.

He frowned.

"Hey, talk," he said, tugging at her cloak. "What am I supposed to do now?"

She smiled kindly, but said nothing. There wasn't any emotion ... why? Maybe he hadn't given her enough energy. There was still a huge hollow around himself, maybe she wasn't entirely alive yet.

"Come on, tell me what to next! Aren't we supposed to fix the world?"

"Yes," the thing that wasn't quite Volphied said.

"Where are you?"

It couldn't answer, because he himself didn't know.

Someone else did speak up. "Val, what is that?"

He hadn't even notice Claire enter, even as she gave off strong emotions and light fell through the door's rift. Anxiety, doubt and confusion mingled in.

Quickly, he switched back on Val ul Copt, but only partially. He remained in adult form to match her grown up self.

"I ... I made it," Val said. "I remembered her, she helped me once."

Claire clenched her fists. She grew a wing and used it to touch the very tip of the projection's long cloak, only to pull back as if burned.

"You took Luna's power for this, didn't you?"

"Yeah, what of it? Why are you even here?" he muttered.

"I may not see you astrally, but I am well aware of Luna and Filia."

Claire closed the door behind her, returning the darkness save for the glow of the failed Volphied. Val dissolved the projection entirely, he didn't need it. Claire was here now, he had to focus on her.

"Don't tell Filia," he said. "If she knows, so does Luna. She'll kill me."

"No, she'd only do that if—aaah!" He slammed a claw into the wall near her head.

"Did Filia ever tell Luna how to build a beacon so she could teleport me to her to be killed?"

Claire's eyes were wide in fear, but not for long. She slipped away under his arm. When she turned back to him, her face was even again.

"She did. Why would she not? She wasn't wrong to think you'd snap. But she did not want you dead, she thought Luna would subdue you."

Something about the monotone, couldn't care less way of delivery irked him beyond belief. She still wasn't acting like a real living person.

"Val, why are you trying to find a reason to not trust your mother?"

Scrambled memories offered up a plethora of reasons : she is golden dragon echoed through all of them. The nemesis of the ancient dragons. This mingled with his new life, which said the opposite.

Lost in this, he could only shrug and try another tactic. "I don't know," he muttered, letting the feelings from the new life boil up. "I guess I'm just scared. I don't really know who I am anymore. And then you're here, being entirely sure of who you are even when you're in pieces. I don't get it."

That got the desired effect. Claire deflated and stepped closer, hesitant. Her emotions tasted of the same malfunctional imitation of sympathy, the best she could muster. Still, it was real enough to influence her.

When she embraced him, it was awkward and mechanic. It didn't even fit. She should have talked to him, but her naivety was fine with Val. He'd get her silence more easily like this.

"I didn't mean to hurt you, Claire," he said. "I just lost control for a little bit. I only really hurt people if they try to kill me, but I didn't go on a rampage with Luna, did I?"

"You passed out," she said dryly.

"That's because I got hit. Ask mom for my injuries, I was already fleeing from Luna when she shot me. I'm really trying not to lose control, but if mom hears I took a piece of Luna's power, she'll be scared."

Claire pulled away. "Why did you do that?"

"Cause there's one thing I agree on with Luna : it's not a good idea to let power go. I will protect mom better, and with Luna, I don't feel bad about taking it."

"Is that really all the reason?" she asked as she pulled back and looked in his eyes.

"Yes, that's why I tried projecting that woman. Wouldn't two bodies be handy? I can fight from a distance!" he said eagerly. "Besides, someone has to do something to protect us. The gods aren't doing it, and you won't do much either."

"I'm -"

He held up his hands, laughing lightly but letting a little anger leak into his aura. "I know. You need to stay hidden, you and your Knight. And we both know Luna will leave the moment the talisman is out. That's why I had to something."

"I see," she mumbled. "I won't tell her. I don't know whether I can keep it from Lyos, though."

"Good," Val said. "Maybe we should tell him. I'd like to learn how to fight better."

She nodded, smiling and weary, but as compliant as he wanted.

· · · · · · ·

Filia and Luna didn't resolve anything, unless you could call not talking to each other a resolution.

Lyos learned, and didn't like the silence Claire vowed him to keep, but agreed to spar with Val.

Even as Volphied was incomplete, there finally was movement in the plan.

When a few days later, the pillar turned on again, it didn't even bother him. Positively he could make it all work out once he was back in shape, he just leaned out of the window and watched. This one didn't summon gods, but devils. One ray went to the Kataart Mountains, one ray to an location in the south; this one broke off quickly.

It bore a strong sense of approaching his greatest wish.

· · · · · · ·