.
Chapter 44
Family Disputes
Edward
"Don't be so nosy!" Esmé rebuked the family, but in reality, was no less tensely.
Only Jake wasn't curious. He was quite sure of it after seeing a very definite twinkle in his mother's eyes at lunchtime today.
I rolled my eyes as he endeavored not to imagine what exactly we had done. Fortunately, there were enough thoughts here to give off a sufficient buzz of voices to not have to eavesdrop on any thoughts. But immediately I concentrated on Jake again.
He had been happy for his mother that she seemed happy. Leah's broken heart aside, Bella had appeared absolutely relaxed and cheerful to him. But then it had occurred to him what that meant with me, of all people. A vampire. A blood-drinking vampire. Namely, that I would take his mother's life to make her one of us. I would kill her. Take her from him and Leah. Forever! In return, he would get a mother who surrendered herself to the blood. No matter in whom this blood would flow.
He became angry. So much so that even Bella backed away from him. And his anger increased when Jasper protectively put himself in front of Bella.
His mother was already taken from him!
"Jake!" I said reassuringly, stepping toward him.
Angered, he glared at me.
He wanted to destroy me!
I gently put my hands on his neck, hoping perhaps to dampen the fire of phasing with which he himself was already struggling.
"Jake, it's not like that!" I tried to say, which elicited a disappointed murmur from my family, who didn't realize what was going on inside Jake right now.
They saw my words only as the answer to Alice's question.
Jake remained in a blind fury, threatening to lose his temper at any moment.
In the presence of two fragile humans.
Quickly I pushed him outside.
If he were to phase here in the room, surrounded by six vampires, who knows what he would then do in his rage.
It didn't take long for Jake to actually phase. His clothes shredded and angrily he stood in front of me. He was accusing me in his thoughts.
Murderer. Seducer. I should stay away from his mother. From Becky. From Leah. From him. And if I refused, he would use force.
I tried to give my opinion, to reassure him, to tell him that his fears were exaggerated. I spoke softly so no one could tell Bella what exactly Jake had in store for charges.
He cursed me, threatened me.
Then he attacked. He jumped full force in my direction, but Leah stood in his way and growled at him.
They 'discussed' with each other. Only now I recognized this wolfish telepathic gift. They heard each other's thoughts. On Friday night at Samantha's, I had thought it was a coincidence, perhaps due to the fact that they were just twins, but they had actually coordinated with each other.
Loudly Jake announced his misgivings and no less audibly Leah tried to nullify them. But Jake did not want to hear anything that spoke against his conviction.
They argued and fought relentlessly. Again and again Jake tried to get past his sister to me and again and again just by a hair's breadth I avoided his teeth or Leah stood in his way.
It surprised me how much Leah defended me. Without thinking, she accepted being caught by Jake's snout or his paws herself, which she also couldn't prevent a few times. I did not dare to actively defend myself. I could have hurt Jake.
I thought hard about what I could do, whether I could intervene at all - if necessary, with the help of my brothers. I didn't want to see either of them seriously hurt. Neither by me, nor by each other. The only thing that could have been done would have been to separate the two of them, but I doubted very much that this could be done without violence.
Emmett and Jasper were soon standing with me, but after a brief unproductive discussion, I sent them back inside, lest Jake might get the idea to attack either of them. They would be able to do just as little without hurting the two. Only Jazz I asked for equanimity, which seemed to be of little use with these two predators. So, I continued to talk at Jake, but he hardly heard me. He refused to listen to me.
"Ouch ..." Becky cried out involuntarily.
I did not let the wolves out of my sight.
I saw through their thoughts the reason for the brief outcry. Bella and Becky were both pale with fear, but obviously unharmed otherwise.
I concentrated again on Jake, who was getting back to fighting his sister faster than Leah herself. He pushed her back with irrepressible force, which Leah hadn't seen coming, however, she was mentally still with Becky and her mother's horrified face. Lightning fast I followed the massive body.
She would hit her head on the stairs with full force.
But for one thing, I was too far from her, and for another, Jake was standing halfway in front of me with his teeth bared.
Jake's whole being focused only on me, not wasting a thought on Leah, whose impact he had not seen.
I was just dodging him.
At some point, Jake had to come to his senses.
I made another attempt to talk to him, to draw his attention to Leah, to position myself in her direction so that he could see that she was lying unconscious on the ground, but it was futile.
All he heard were his own arguments and all he saw were the red and bloodthirsty eyes of his imagination.
Then I saw Bella through Jake's thoughts.
His thoughts were silent and he looked steadily into the bitter eyes of his mother. According to his imagination blood red! However, the closer Bella got, the more they took on their actual chocolate brown color to Jake. And the more he recognized the flashes of anger they seemed to radiate.
Bella stood right in front of me as if to protect me from the wolf.
I didn't dare touch her. That would possibly enrage Jake all over again, and Bella was much too close to her son for that danger.
"Jacob ... William ... Black ... Look what you've done!" said Bella with all the hardness of a mother.
No child would be able to resist that tone of voice.
Jake winced at the sound, which quivered with anger. Conquered, Jake backed away. He followed the direction indicated by Bella, fleetingly brushed his mother with his fur, and trotted - frightened of himself - to his sister.
Only now did he realize what he had caused.
"Jacob," Bella suddenly murmured weakly. Her breathing was worryingly shallow and her heart seemed about to explode. "He looks ... like Jacob."
Her voice broke away and she collapsed.
"Bella?" I murmured fearfully, but she didn't move.
Her heart kept hammering, mercilessly.
Grieved, I lifted my head and looked for Carlisle, while the rest of my family meanwhile came rushing out of the house, worrying about Leah. Esmé had even thought of bathrobes for the twins now that they were naked.
Even if I was very worried, Bella was alive and could wait a moment.
I searched Carlisle's thoughts to find out what was going on with Leah.
Leah was alive, but had a very serious injury to her head that bled incessantly. Carlisle considered the next step, as her vital functions were absolutely normal. A skull fracture was the least she should have, but he would have to x-ray her. Since we got to know Bella, we always had a fully equipped examination and surgery room at our disposal. It had already proven itself a few times in recent years. Lost hikers, injured craftsmen or the like.
He carefully picked Leah up off the ground with Esmé's help, endeavoring not to move her head any more than absolutely necessary.
"They heal very quickly," I still explained and he nodded.
I had completely forgotten about Jake for that brief moment.
He had been sitting completely distraught next to his sister, muttering apologies to himself, and now straightened up to follow Carlisle, Esmé, and Leah. Only now he picked up the bathrobe, quickly threw it over himself and was surrounded by my siblings with evil gazes.
They had reservations about what else this young wolf would be capable of when he was already going for his own sister, and considered what they should do with him in the most expedient way. Lock him up. Throw him out. Hold him.
"You will do nothing!" was all I said, and my family turned to me.
Only now did they seem to notice that Bella and I were also still there. Bella was already in my arms, but now I lifted her up to carry her into the house as well.
Jake turned chalky white and sank back to his knees as he saw his mother, supposedly lifeless, in my arms.
"Leave Jake alone!" I growled and walked past their stunned faces.
I carefully laid Bella down on a lounger in the library when Rosalie came in a moment later and closed the door behind her. She held a silver tray in her hands and placed it on the small side table.
A syringe. Disinfectants. A small vial. And a cotton ball.
"This is what Carlisle wanted me to bring you ... How is Bella?" she explained and asked anxiously.
"What do you care?" I asked a little more caustically than I intended. I looked at the medicine vial. A sedative that would stabilize her circulation. "You couldn't stand Bella and were even ready to kill her because she knew too much about us!" I stated and prepared the injection.
"Used to!" she shook her head contemptuously. She knelt down next to me, held Bella's arm a little, disinfected the skin, and only whispered, "Earlier, I also did not know how you are without her ... What was with Jake earlier?"
"Fear! ... Afraid that I will change Bella and so take her away from him," I explained just as quietly.
"And is he right about that?" she asked curiously.
I had wanted to delay it a little longer, that Bella and I were really reunited. Simply to annoy Alice. But now I was anything but in the mood for fraternal friction.
"Yes and no ... I know you would give anything to have a child of your own. In this respect, you can probably imagine how unbreakable the bond between mother and child is ... Yes, I will make her one of us if she asks me to, and I have no other choice anymore. But she will always remain Jake's mother," I murmured and gave Bella the syringe slowly at the same time.
Rose immediately pressed the cotton ball on the spot so that it neither bled nor bruised. Gently she stroked over Bella's hand while doing so.
She was really worried about Bella. I was a little surprised about that. On the other hand, she had also suffered under my persistent bad mood in recent years.
"She thanked me," I said quietly, putting a hand to Bella's cheek. I heard in Rose's thoughts the question of why. "That I left her ... You were right that time and now she can understand. Now she has the children she didn't want to hear about back then."
Rose smiled a little smugly and in her mind she followed it up with: 'I told you so!'
"And what does Leah think?" Rose asked further.
"Leah hasn't really thought about it before, at least in my presence, but is now aware of it and accepts it ... But to Jake, the transformation seems like murder. Like I'm taking her life."
"You wouldn't happen to be related, would you? You and Jake?" she teased.
I shook my head with a smirk and Rose left me alone with Bella.
Bella's vital functions normalized after some time, but she would still sleep a little due to the sedative. That gave me a chance to check on Leah and go to Jake. I gave her another kiss on the forehead and smiled as I did so.
Vampire-related cardiac rhythm disturbances.
My entire family stood in the hallway between the library and the operating room, and Becky, who immediately came running into my arms crying.
I was a little surprised, but returned the hug. I eavesdropped on her thoughts.
She was worried and afraid. Worried for Leah, of course, and for Bella. But afraid for Jake. Because of what I might do to Jake. That I would repay him for this attack on me and he would lose in the process.
"Becky, I'm not mad at Jake!" I whispered reassuringly. I really wasn't. I could understand his way of thinking, even if he had acted way too ruthlessly.
Becky looked back at me with wide disbelieving eyes, a gaze that melted icebergs.
How much I liked this girl, even though I really had nothing to do with Becky.
"I'm not going to hurt Jake! I give you my word!" I promised and wiped away Becky's tears. "Will you do me the favor and stay with Bella? I don't want her to be alone," I then asked and Becky nodded.
Anyone of my family would take care of Bella when I wasn't by her side, but Becky needed to be kept busy. She should not become obsessed with any ideas that were not true, and I could already hear Esmé's thoughts. She would join her in a moment to distract Becky from her thoughts.
My family immediately surrounded me as Becky pulled the door shut behind her.
Questions about what had been going on, how Bella was doing, what I would do with Jake, why I had refused Jazz and Em's help, whether that was normal with wolves, and if Bella would then be in danger.
I only briefly enlightened them about what was necessary.
"No need to worry. Bella's blood pressure just dropped, but it's stable again," I took a deep breath.
"Now what about Jake now?" asked Jasper dismissively.
"None of you will touch him or ever hold this against him!" I almost growled.
"What if he snaps again? What if he goes after one of us ... or after Bella?" interjected Emmett.
"He won't!" I insisted and entered the next room.
Leah was still unconscious and lying on the stretcher with an IV, only moderately covered by a bathrobe. X-ray images were visible on the laptop. Carlisle was examining blood at the microscope now and intermediately ran vampirically fast back and forth looking at the results of various lab instruments.
Jake sat on the floor in a corner where he thought he was out of the way. He looked at me with his hair tussling and his eyes wet with tears.
He pleaded in his thoughts for forgiveness and asked how his mom was doing.
I ignored him for the time being.
A little self-deprecation might do him some good.
"How is she?" I asked Carlisle, walking up to Leah.
Only now he noticed me, too fascinated by all the examination results.
"They heal very quickly," he smiled at me encouragingly.
His smile was not nearly enough to put me at ease.
"Here ... Look at this," he pointed to the X-ray images. "Taken every two minutes," he scrolled through the images.
I cringed at the first one.
Emergency surgery would have been necessary to prevent the bone splinters from the fracture from damaging her brain. Or damage it even more. With very little chance that the patient would survive. But with each subsequent image, the severity of the injury lessened.
"And they have twenty-four chromosome pairs," Carlisle noted, as if unwrapping his Christmas present.
He speculated that this was why Alice had never seen the two in a vision and further suspected that Bella would remain invisible to Alice by living with the wolves. And for me this would then possibly apply, if I shared my life with Bella. But it was still no more than a guess.
"Jake said that her unnatural healing was proceeding with an uncomfortable, sometimes painful burning sensation. I gave her morphine, but it seems to be consumed by her body temperature before any effect sets in. So, I went with something more drastic to make her sleep through the healing process," he said, pointing to the IV drip.
Carlisle looked at me closely while I adjusted the robe a bit over Leah.
She was hot. Hotter than usual. I felt it through the fluffy fabric. That wolves had a higher temperature than humans, I knew that by now. But this seemed to me too high.
I checked the pulse in the conventional way on her neck, so that I could also take her body temperature. Something made me bristle and Carlisle immediately appeared right at Leah's side.
Her heart skipped a beat at the exact moment I touched her. This could not be!
I smiled weakly.
"You seem to be familiar with it?" inquired Carlisle in surprise.
"Actually, only with Bella ... Do you have any guesses as to why she seems to be burning up inside?" I asked worriedly, without taking my hand or my eyes off Leah. Perhaps she sensed my presence through the anesthesia and would know she was not alone.
"A side effect of the rapid healing process. But it's just a theory," he said, then continued to talking to me in his thoughts. 'You love those kids!' he stated, looking at me in a very fatherly way.
"How could I not!" I replied quietly, turning my gaze in Jake's direction, hiding his head between his arms.
He was only accusing himself, as I didn't seem to pay him any attention.
"Both of them," I whispered et.
'They are very adorable. Esmé already views them as her grandchildren,' Carlisle smiled at me.
I nodded understanding.
They are. Adorable. All three of them even! Even if I had only really gotten to know the twins for so few days, and knew Becky even less, just the suspicion that they were Bella's children had been enough for me to give my life for them. But with each passing day, I learned that these children were truly worth loving and protecting, regardless of the fact that they were related to Bella. And Jake's tantrum would not change my mind about that.
Carlisle also now asked what had gotten into Jake earlier.
Quickly and quietly, I enlightened him.
He was sympathetic to Jake. So was I.
'Young adults sometimes react in a quick-tempered and rash manner, and he fought with all the means at his disposal for his family, which he saw threatened by you.'
I nodded again and looked to Jake.
Time to end his self-reproach.
"You call me when she wakes up," I asked Carlisle still, giving Jake a stern gaze to follow me.
Silently, I walked downstairs with him. My siblings were not quite so silent in the hallway and Jake followed me more and more anxiously.
He imagined horror scenarios of what I would do to him.
I suppressed a smirk at his imagination and went with him to the terrace. There lay Leah's clothing and Jake's scraps of cloth, which he now guiltily gathered together.
"You're scared," I began, sitting down on the stairs.
He nodded without looking at me.
"The thought of your mother becoming a vampire doesn't enthuse me any more than it does you," I clarified a bit more specifically, as his fear was just concentrated on the fear of me.
He lifted his head and looked at me in confusion.
"I wouldn't exactly call it murder, but that's actually what it is ..." I began to explain my view.
I told him about my faith, that I considered my kind to be soulless, that I did not wish this existence on anyone. Especially not his mother. She deserved so much better than this life.
Jake listened intently and was surprised at my attitude. Then he began to apologize.
No matter what his opinion was, however, it didn't give him the right to freak out and attack me like that. It was however his mother's decision whom she got involved with and what she intended to do with her life. He was just the child who had no right to interfere.
I forbade him to think so.
He was wrong about that, as Leah already was on Friday when I sat in the kitchen with her.
We talked for some time.
Intermediately, Esmé brought him a plate with a large slice of homemade pizza, which he welcomed with a growling stomach.
I thanked Esmé and rebuked myself.
So much for that, I would have to think more conscientiously that, not only Bella, but also her children eat regularly. The last thing they had all eaten was a breakfast that had been far too many hours ago for all of them. I was surprised that Esmé had enough food in the house. That had only been the case for us in Forks, when Bella was still coming in and out of our house every day. But I recognized it in her thoughts.
After my siblings' extravagant guesses after Samantha's death, she wanted to be prepared and had bought some groceries yesterday. Just in case I brought another human here. And if it had only been wolves, who wanted to talk to Carlisle as our family head or announce their judgment about me.
"If you look closely at the other vampires here ..., don't you think there's a worse way to live?" I then asked Jake yet as he was munching on a second slice of pizza. With this, I even made a great admission to myself, but it could also not be denied that such an existence was better than many other paths in life that a person could choose.
"I guess you're right," he admitted after some consideration.
"If your mother wants this life, I will give it to her. Whether she asks me for it tomorrow, next week, next year, or maybe never. Even if it means that one day, I will carry her to her grave."
"And I will continue to love her. She'll always be my mom. No matter what she is or where she is," Jake stated to himself as Carlisle called just then that the IV had now run through and Leah would probably wake up soon.
"Your sister's perking up," I enlightened Jake.
"Oh no," he said sullenly, hiding his face in his hands.
"She won't kill you!"
"You haven't the faintest idea!" he muttered.
I picked up Leah's clothing and went into the kitchen with Jake to get Leah some of the pizza as well. Esmé had already brought Becky a slice.
I would have forgotten that, too.
"I guess the rest is for Mom and Leah," Jake looked very closely at the pizza tray.
"Are you still hungry?" I asked a little incredulously. He already had two really big pieces.
He shrugged his shoulders.
I went to a cupboard I had seen in Esmé's thoughts, grabbed a bag of small ready-made chocolate croissants and tossed them to him. He tore it open immediately.
"Thanks!" Jake muttered.
He said nothing more, but I heard the explanation in his thoughts.
The first thought was for the croissants. But that was not all. Not by a long shot. He was grateful that I had forgiven him for his behavior and that I had explained my take on things in detail without appearing condescending or presumptuous on his part. And yet another thought emerged rather unconsciously. I had already heard this subliminally a few times in the last week, and this morning Bella also said something along these lines: his father would be disappointed in him. I got a little angry when I saw, through brief snatches of memory, all the things that had been thrown at him and Leah in La Push, and how one praised his father to the skies. How could such young people be told such things!
"Jake ... I am not your father, though ... but I would be very proud to have a son like you!" I said frankly. I doubted Jacob Black would have a different opinion of Jake or Leah if he were still alive.
His face became hilarious.
Besides the fact that he didn't want to believe me, he was embarrassed that I said it that way.
"Don't talk nonsense. I almost killed you earlier!" he tried to deflect and ridicule my opinion, because it seemed much more logical to him.
"And still that's it," I walked up to him and put my hands on his shoulders so he would look at me again. "You were convinced that I was a danger to your mother and you acted on that conviction. Not particularly many people can say that about themselves. You would have messed with all the vampires in the world just to keep Bella safe from me. You wanted to protect her. Your mother, your sister, and your girlfriend. At any price ... What father wouldn't be proud of his son?" I explained and let my words sink in for a moment.
With his eyes still a little doubtful, he looked at me.
"I mean it, Jake," I followed it up.
"Thank you!" he said again, this time really looking me in the eye with gratitude.
No one had ever said anything like that to him. Except for Bella, of course, but as his mother, she is more or less biased.
I took him in my arms and it felt strange. More accommodating and meaningful than I had expected. And I heard that my siblings had eavesdropped on our brief conversation. They would never reproach this outburst against Jake.
"We'll still have to work a little on the permissiveness of your thoughts!" I teased him as we walked upstairs.
He actually blushed a little and looked down at the floor in embarrassment.
Back with Leah again, I put a hand to her cheek and stroked her gently.
No heartbeat response. A pity, actually.
"Good morning, Princess," I said softly as she opened her eyes.
"Hi ..." she mumbled and blinked a few times.
"How are you feeling?" I inquired.
"Headache," she stated.
I wasn't surprised.
I put to her my hands to the temples.
"That feels good," Leah murmured, closing her eyes again.
She lay there like that for a moment. Her hazy thoughts slowly sorted themselves out and she immediately tried to sit up. I supported her and Leah clung to my arm as I did so.
She seemed a little dizzy, which didn't really surprise me.
"I'll be fine," she then said, taking the robe I was still holding over her.
"Where ... is ... Jake ...?" she then asked emphatically as her thoughts finished organizing themselves.
"Peace offering!" said Jake obsequiously from the foot of the stretcher, holding the plate presentingly in front of him.
He had hidden behind me.
Out of fear. Justified fear.
Leah immediately wanted to pounce on Jake, but I held her back.
"Don't be too hard on him. He's the only brother you have," I told Leah, but she was sparkling at him belligerently.
"I've always wanted to be an only child!" she hissed.
I laughed out.
She was counting in her thoughts how many times she wished she had. Arguing about toys, or about the VW Golf, her getting in trouble for something but him not, and so on. But today she would be strong enough to put it into action herself.
She discarded the thought on her own as the smell of pizza hit her nose and her stomach growled enthusiastically.
"Please take it slow, Leah," I asked as she lunged for the pizza instead of Jake.
She nodded.
She could feel herself that her circulation was not yet back on track.
Jake sat sideways behind Leah so she could lean against him while she ate. He excused himself and the two spoke calmly to each other as I quietly left the room.
Then I went back to the library.
Becky was still sitting at Bella's side. Esmé was keeping her company in the meantime, but I now sent her over to the other two. Esmé also left us.
I sat down at Bella's side, took her hand in mine and tenderly stroked over my angel's face. I waited patiently until she stirred a little on her own.
Patience was not one of my most outstanding qualities. Only when it came to Bella could I really be persistent. My angel had regained some color and her heart and breathing were regular. 'Then let's mix it up', I thought to myself after some time. My patience had limits.
"Bella!" I whispered and breathed a light kiss on her lips. There was the skip of her heart and her breathing accelerated slightly.
She blinked a few times and then looked at me.
"Edward," she murmured, still a little dazed.
The small crease between her eyes appeared.
"Leah's fine," I said immediately. "She's eating right now, provided she doesn't tear Jake to pieces after all," I reassured her and the wrinkle disappeared.
But her eyes were sparkling.
"I'M going to rip Jake to pieces!"
"YOU want to mess with a wolf?" I inquired skeptically.
"Wouldn't be the first time," she replied flippantly.
"And how did that go last time?"
"I sprained my hand," she muttered offended. "What was wrong with Jake?" she then asked as she carefully sat up.
I held her and told her what had been bothering her son.
Her face froze.
"He's going to hate me!" she stated to herself in shock.
I shook my head indulgently.
"You've been asleep for almost three hours, Dearest ... You have the consent of your BOTH children to let me change you."
For a long time she looked at me, trying to comprehend my words.
"But I don't want it," she then whispered, as if asking me for forgiveness.
I smiled.
"You know I don't really want to do it. I don't want to rob you of your soul or your life. Both are too precious. And I know that's not what you wish at the moment. So, everything is good as it is now ... I love you, Bella, and I don't want to be without you another day. How many there will be."
"I love you, Edward!" she breathed towards me and kissed me lovingly.
Just at that moment I heard the door open further, but nothing could distract me from this kiss, which was a single declaration of love.
Thanks for reading!
