[Open on the back of the Owl House. Cut to the kitchen where Eda is stirring something on the stove while King is watching Luz talk to Willow and Gus on a crystal ball.]
Luz: So they said I couldn't remove my thumb, but look at that! [Pretends to remove her thumb.] Whoop!
Vee let out an ear-piercing shriek of pure terror. "YOUR THUMB!" she screamed. "I can't believe you just removed your own thumb like that! Don't you respect your own limbs?!"
"Relax, Vee!" Luz said with a laugh. "It's just a trick. See?" She proceeded to show her the trick in question.
Gus: You sliced it off! [Panicked.] You sliced off your own thumb!
Willow: [Chuckles.] You make doing homework actually fun.
"I didn't fall for it at all," Willow said.
Luz: And they say humans can't do magic.
King: Luz... [Climbs onto table.] Nyeh! You've been talking to them all morning. Don't forget about the Luz and King comedy hour!
"Oh, man, it's been ages since I did the Luz and King comedy hour," Luz lamented. "Everything got so chaotic that it sort of fell by the wayside. I have to do it again if…if I ever see him again…" Amity patted Luz on the back awkwardly. She was never entirely sure how to comfort her girlfriend when she was like this. The girlfriend gig, she found, was dreadfully unorganized. It should have come with a manual.
Eda: Please, no. Not the comedy hour...
King: This week I've been working with props! [Turns around to show a cardboard tube on his nose.] Oh dear, I've gotten a tube stuck on my nose! Will I ever eat again? [Slams a piece of bread on his face.] Looks like I'm toast!
Camila and Luz shared a laugh. "You definitely inherited your father's sense of humor there."
[Luz and King laugh.]
Eda: It just goes on like this for an hour!
"An hour of fun and breadfully good puns!" Luz quipped.
Luz: Heyo, dough boy, quit loafing around!
King: Why don't you bake me?
[Luz and King laugh. The crystal ball buzzes with an alarm and flashes red. The time, 8:00, flashes below Willow and Gus.]
Luz: School time! See you guys in class!
Willow: Bye!
Gus: But what about the thumb?!
"I…knew she hadn't really removed her thumb," Gus said, who was in fact lying and had spent the better part of an hour wondering why Luz had just cavalierly removed one of her own fingers and what sort of trauma she must have experienced to be cool with that.
[Luz ends the call. King sighs disappointedly.]
Luz: Hey, don't worry. We'll finish our comedy hour when I get home. [Kisses King's skull and heads for the door.]
King: Hee hee, oh, you!
Luz: [Sing-songy.] Try not to miss me while I'm gone! [Closes door.]
"So I went to Hexside, and guess what? Pixie infestation! Man, those guys have one heck of a bite. Not that I know that from personal experience when I tried to fight them all by my lonesome."
[Luz comes through the door.]
Eda: Hey, you're—
King: You're back! [Climbs up onto Luz's head.] I didn't miss you at all.
Camila gave a fond smile. For such a scammer, Eda was terrible at teaching people to lie, wasn't she?
Luz: Apparently there's an infestation of pixies at Hexside, so school's been canceled.
King: That sounds like a crumby situation.
Luz played a rimshot on her phone.
[Luz and King laugh.]
Hooty: Hey! Guess what's been in my mouth that I'm about to throw up!
"OH MY GOD!" Camila screamed and covered her eyes.
[Hooty gags for several long moments. Everyone stares at him in disgust. He finally throws up letters and a box.]
Hooty: The mail!
Camila reluctantly withdrew her hand. "Someone needs to teach that creature some manners."
Eda: [Going through the letters.] Junk, junk, death hex.
[She tosses the death hex letter into a trashcan, which condenses into a dark purple ball before disappearing entirely.]
"Does…that happen often?" Camila worried. She had confidence Eda could handle death hexes on her own, but what if Luz opened one by mistake?
Luz shrugged. "Hooty usually neutralizes the really dangerous ones, but he gets distracted sometimes and one slips through once in a while."
"Well, you are not to open any of Eda's mail, then, understood?" Camila said and Luz nodded.
Eda: Oh, a carnival's in town today!
Luz: A carnival? [Takes King off her head.] You know, I've been so busy with school lately, what do you say we take this comedy hour on tour? It'll be a Luz and King day!
King: That's my kinda day!
Luz: [Puts an arm around Eda.] Let's all three of us go!
Hooty: An adventure with friends! I'll go pack my stuff!
Eda: Carnivals bring crowds and crowds bring suckers. This could be the perfect chance to try out my new get-witch-quick scheme. [Takes staff out of pot, knocks goop off of Owlbert.] I'm in! To the carnival!
"Simply incorrigible," Camila said, her voice fond.
Luz and King: To the carnival!
[They all leave.]
-THEME SONG-
[Cut to the Bonesborough Carnival.]
Eda: Well, here we are, kids. Look at all that fresh meat.
[Flies buzz around a fried chicken on a stick.]
"That…doesn't look particularly edible," Camila noted.
"Yeah, figuring out what kind of food I could digest was kind of a trial and error thing," Luz said. "Luckily, Eda has healing potions, so I didn't get too sick."
"I'll have you know flied chicken is a delicious delicacy," Amity said with a sniff.
Luz: [Now in her usual attire.] And smell all the fresh meat! [Sniffs as a fly goes up her nose; coughs it out her mouth.] Fun!
[Owlbert hoots, starts to twist off the staff.]
Eda: No games for you, Owlbert, we've got scams to run.
[Owlbert hoots sadly.]
"I'd let you play all the games you wanted, Flapjack," Hunter said. Flapjack gave an appreciative chirp. "I love you too, pal. We're going to be together forever."
Tibbles: Friends! [Lands in front of them.] Welcome!
[Everyone jumps into defensive poses.]
Tibbles: I see you got my postcard.
Eda: Tibbles? You sent this?
"Eda had this off screen B plot with him during the episode when we animated Hooty," Luz explained. "Hooty crushed his stand, but he had it coming."
[Eda looks on the back of the flier. It reads: "To my Owl House Pals, From Tibbles," and has a picture of Tibbles dancing when Eda tilts it. She lowers it and Tibbles is doing the same dance.]
Tibbles: Mm-hmm.
Luz: Aren't you mad at us for destroying your stand?
King: Ooh, and destroying his life! That was the best part!
"That was the best part," Luz agreed fondly. She really hated Tibbles. It was one thing to try to kill her and her friends, but to try to use the noble name of Azura to defraud the good people of the Isles was simply beyond the pale.
Tibbles: No, no, no. I should thank you. After my stand was destroyed, I reevaluated my life and found my true calling! I'm now ringmaster of... [Snaps whip.] Tibbles's Tent of Tiny Terrors!
[Luz approaches the terrarium containing tiny unicorns, a tiny manticore, and a tiny griffin.]
Luz: Aww. It's like a regular circus but adorably small!
[Griffin hisses.]
Luz: [Presses her face to the glass.] You're my friends now.
"This is going to end with you fighting all of these creatures, isn't it?" Camila said in a tone of pure resignation. Luz gave a nervous laugh.
Eda: I don't buy it. [Sends away her staff.] What kind of con are you running?
Tibbles: No cons here, Owl Lady, only pros. In fact, why don't we toast our newfound friendship with this totally innocent bottle of water. [Pulls out potion.]
"What is with everyone on the Isles being bad at scamming people?" Camila wondered.
"Not everyone," Luz said darkly. "There's one person who is very, very good at it…"
Eda: [Takes potion; sarcastically.] Oh yeah, sure! Why don't I just—
[Eda throws the bottle. It lands on an Oracle Teacher's head and knocks them on their back.]
Oracle Teacher: I'm okay!
Eda: I know poison when I see it; you can't scam a scammer! Now speaking of scams... [Walks up to a stand.] Beat it loser! [Knocks the vendor's stuff to the ground.] Step right up to... [Transforms the stand.] Eda's Human Horror House! Humans shed their skin and I've got proof. [Pulls out fishnet stockings.]
"We don't shed our skin," Camila said, her voice tired. "And those are stockings, a type of clothes." Gus eagerly took notes on a notepad.
King: You should really put a lock on your closet.
Camila scowled. Luz's clothes should have been private. Eda had no right to essentially steal her clothes and try to sell them. She would add that to the list of things that would have to be discussed with Eda when they met.
Luz: You know what, Eda can pick through my socks all she wants. Because today is all about having a great time with my partner in crime.
King: That's me! I love crime!
[Luz and King laugh, and walk off.]
[Cut to a dunk tank.]
Abomination Student: Dunk the skeleton! Win a prize!
[A ball hits the target, dumping the skeleton into a cauldron labelled SKIN. The skeleton pops out now covered in skin.]
Camila raised an eyebrow. The Isles would never fail to surprise her.
Skeleton: Ah! Aah! I'm covered in pores!
Luz: Now this is my kind of weird! So what do you wanna do first? We could brave the molar coaster, or eat a mysterious blob...
"Please don't go around eating mysterious blobs, Luz," Camila said. "You don't know how much damage it could do."
Luz scoffed. "In the Isles, everything is mysterious."
King: Ooh, what's that? [Runs up to prize booth.] Ah! Some kind of deadly string weapon.
Luz: No, silly. That's a friendship bracelet.
King: Is that a type of deadly weapon?
Luz: A weapon of love. [Grabs them and puts them together, forming a heart.] It's basically a declaration to the whole world that you're the best of friends.
King: Ooh! That's way safer than becoming blood brothers!
"That's an ancient and forbidden ritual to change one's very nature so that from a biological standpoint, you are siblings in more than name," Hunter explained. "It's very dangerous, though. At least, according to the books I read. But then again, who knows how accurate anything we know is anymore?"
Luz, we must have those bracelets!
Prize Vendor: And yoink. [Takes bracelets back.] Sorry, ma'am. If your bone son wants these bracelets you'll have to play the games and win the tickets. You know, carnival rules.
King: [Tugging cuff on Luz's shorts.] Beat up the man and steal his things for me.
Luz: Or let's just play the games.
Camila breathed a slight sigh of relief. It was probably a bad sign she had suspected even a tiny bit for even an instant that Luz might even consider for a second to beat up this vendor and steal his merchandise.
King: Oh, okay.
Luz and King: [Laughs.] Games! Games! Games! Games!
Luz: [Gasps.] Friends!
"After I missed the last carnival because I thought there'd be skeletons, Gus absolutely insisted I attend this one," Willow said. "He can be very persuasive when he wants to be."
"I have the best puppy Cerberus eyes," Gus bragged.
Willow: Luz!
Gus: Hey, Luz!
[They all hug.]
Luz: Oh my gosh, I didn't think I'd see carniv-y'all here.
Gus: [Gives a thumbs-down.] Boo.
"I am unappreciated on an epic scale," Luz sulked.
Willow: I got an invitation from Tibbles.
Gus: We figured it's a trap since we squashed his stand with a walking house.
"So you just walked into this trap, then?" Camila asked Gus and Willow.
"I mean…the Isles has a lot more dangerous things than Tibbles," Willow pointed out. "As a bad guy, he kind of sucks. Anyway, I'm not the one who fell for his trick."
Willow: But who cares? [Excitedly.] This place has a Scarris wheel.
Gus: It's like a human Ferris wheel but it gives you long-lasting nightmares.
"Why would you ride that?" Camila wondered.
"That's a good question," Luz said. "Here's a better one: Why wouldn't you ride that?"
Luz: Yes! This mama is ready for trauma.
Luz froze. How could she have taken the idea of trauma so calmly? Didn't she understand anything back then? Of course not. She was just a stupid, naïve girl playing at being a witch. It was just painful watching her waltz through the isles, heedless to the incredible danger she was putting herself in. The whole thing was just a game to her. And she'd lost. Epically. Everyone had.
King: Ahem.
Luz: Oh, yeah. We're on a very important quest to win a special prize for King.
Willow: Oh! We can help with that.
Gus: Aw. Does the little guy wanna win a prize? Uh, does he? Uh, does he? [Cooing, waves his finger at King.]
"I can't help myself!" Gus said. "I know he wants to be feared and all that, but he's so cute."
King: Nyeh! [Knocks Gus's finger away.]
Luz: What do you think, King? The more the merrier, huh?
King: Um, sure. Whatever you want, Luz.
Luz sighed. She should have read between the lines and realized King wanted some one on one time. But she saw him all the time at the Owl House. Although she was very busy doing homework a lot of the time. She had wanted so much to spend time with her friends that she hadn't thought about how it made King feel. Granted, that hadn't justified his later actions, but still, Luz couldn't help but feel guilty. She wondered if one day she'd ever stop feeling guilty for everything. She suspected not.
Luz: All right. Approval!
[Willow, Luz, and Gus cheer. The three of them jog away. King tries to keep up and trips. Montage: Willow rolls a skee-ball into the machine's mouth.
"There ain't nothing in any universe that can't be improved by a good montage!" Luz asserted.
Luz and Gus cheer her on and the three of them run off. King arrives and gets hit with the ball when the machine spits it at him; the four of them are walking when they notice a picture board. They all stick their heads through the holes, but King is stuck with being the trashcan; Luz takes a bite out of a fried orb and hands it to Willow. She takes a small bite out of it and hands it to Gus. He eats the rest of it, leaving none for King, who had been between Willow and Gus; Luz, Willow, and Gus are leaning against a stand.]
"Aw, poor King," Vee said. She felt a great deal of sympathy for the miniscule demon. She sensed a kindred spirit in him somehow. She wasn't sure why.
Willow: So the pixie infestation was actually caused when Boscha's pet pixie escaped its cage...
Luz: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
"And did she get in trouble for it?" Willow groused. "Of course not! Because her moms are both on the PCA! It's not fair. Something has to be done about it when we get home."
[King jumps and grunts, trying to actually play the booth. He finally latches onto the edge of the booth but falls back.]
King: [Screams, grunts.] Curse these stubby legs!
[Gus, Willow, and Luz laugh.]
"Aw, now I feel really bad about that," Luz said, looking at the floor.
[King walks away. Cut to King walking, looking at the bottle in his hands.]
"While he was gone, he encountered Tibbles disguised as a psychic named Obvioso," Luz explained. "Tibbles gave him a potion bottle that was supposed to make people disappear. He was thinking about using it on Willow and Gus, then making them reappear when our fun time was over."
Camila sighed. "But you would have spent the whole time looking for them."
"He's a kid," Luz defended him. "He doesn't really think things through."
King: Hmm, maybe I should think about this first.
"Except in this case when he did a little," Luz immediately backtracked.
Luz: King!
[King shoves the bottle in his fanny pack.]
Luz: Sorry we lost you back there, little dude.
King: Hey, it's okay. [Grabs Luz's hand.] Let's go back to the games and win those bracelets.
Gus: [Grabs Luz's other hand.] But we haven't gone on any rides and there's no line for the bumper carcasses.
Gus sighed. "I just wanted to spend time with my best friend," he said. "We all knew Luz wasn't going to be staying. We wanted to get in as much time with her as possible."
King: Games!
Gus: Carcasses!
King: Games!
Gus: Carcasses!
[Luz's stomach growls loudly. They all look at it.]
Luz: Food! I'm gonna crab some rotten candy while you guys figure this out. [Runs.] Bye!
"I'm Luz's rotten candy haired goddess," Amity said proudly, forgetting momentarily she had promised to keep her relationship with Luz on the down low.
"You're what?" Camila said.
"Cotton candy," Luz corrected her. "Oh my gosh, have you been thinking I've been calling your hair rotten candy haired? That's terrible!"
Amity's brow furrowed. "Uh, why? I like rotten candy. It's tasty. And I don't know what that other thing is."
"Oh," Luz said, sighing with relief. "Crisis averted, then! We'll have to get you some cotton candy later."
Amity had no idea why she wanted to do that. Candy that tasted like hair sounded terrible. But she was willing to give it a try for her Luz.
"So you're her cotton candy haired goddess, then?" Camila said teasingly.
"LET'S SEE WHAT GUS AND WILLOW WERE DOING!" Luz shouted before Amity could even open her mouth to respond.
Willow: [To Gus.] When Luz comes back let's go on the three-man cauldron spinner.
Gus: Or the triple swing.
Willow: Oh, and that's close to those photo booths that can fit exactly three people.
King: But today was me and Luz's day.
Gus: Aw. Does the little baby boo miss his buddy Luz? [Picks King up.]
Gus sighed. He really should have treated King with more respect. He understood very well how much it sucked to be underestimated because of one's size and age. But still, he was so incredibly cute. A lot of people would have done the same, like Willow had.
[Willow chuckles.]
Gus: Uh, does he? Uh, does he?
King: [Grunts.] The King of Demons misses nobody.
Luz hoped it was true. She hoped her brother had forgotten about her. Why would he ever want to be burdened with remembering and missing such a screwup?
[Gus laughs.]
King: I demand you put me down!
[The potion falls out of King's pouch. It lands on the ground and sprays Willow and Gus.]
"See?" Luz said. "Total accident. He never would have done it on purpose. I've taught him better than that."
Willow and Gus: What?
[Willow and Gus disappear.]
King: Oh, no! What have I done?
Luz: Wow. I guess they really wanted to ride those bumper carcasses.
King: Actually, Luz. There's something I gotta tell you.
Luz: No. There's something I gotta tell you, King. [Pauses.] I said I'd help you win those friendship bracelets. So win them we shall, okay?
King: Uh... [Whispers.] Willow and Gus will be okay for a little while, right?
"So that's what he said," Luz said. "Wow, this memory stuff is pretty neat."
Luz: What was that?
King: Nothing. Now let's go! [Chuckles.]
Luz: Ready or not, here we crumb.
Camila grinned. Luz was just like her father. Manny could drop puns until the cows came home.
King: Yes! Ha ha!
[Camera pans down to Willow and Gus, who have actually shrunk and not disappeared.]
Gus: First, I'm growing out of my clothes. Now I'm shrinking? Dang, puberty. You're the craziest coaster of 'em all.
Gus shuddered. "That was a very unpleasant time."
Willow: Ugh.
Gus: [Screams.] What happened to us? Did I blackout on the molar coaster again?
Willow: Sketchy carnival rides are not to blame this time. King had something in his pouch that made us small.
Gus: And I just got tall enough for the rides! [Sobs.]
"I think you need to sort out your priorities there, Gus," Hunter said.
[A shadow falls over them.]
Willow: Gus...
[The creature that Tibbles sprayed before is now standing in front of them. The creature roars.]
"At this point, I'm barely even surprised anymore," Camila said.
Gus: Ah!
[Willow grabs Gus' hand and runs to a Styrofoam cup. Willow moves it so they're standing under it.]
Gus: I think we're safe now.
[A tongue pierces the cup three times. Willow and Gus scream.]
Gus: Ew! [Hugs Willow.]
Willow: Enough of this!
[Willow's eyes glow green. Vines sprout from the ground and grab onto the creature's tongue, trapping it on the cup.]
Hunter watched the screen eagerly. He loved it when the captain used her magic. How anyone could have ever mistaken her for anything vaguely resembling weak, he would never ever know.
[Willow and Gus run to a dropped rotten candy.]
Willow: Quick! We have to find Luz and get her attention before any more carnival animals hunt us down.
"Yes, yes, bring my daughter into this," Camila grumbled.
"She would have gotten involved eventually anyway," Gus reminded her.
[Willow grabs some rotten candy and whistles. A fly lands and eats the rotten candy.]
Willow: Eat up, my steed. Lead us to safety. [Climbs onto the fly.]
Gus: It's so hairy. Why is it so hairy?
"Well…" Hunter began.
"That was a rhetorical question!" Gus said frantically. "I did not want to know the answer to that!"
Willow: Because up close, everything is hairy. [Grabs Gus and flies away.]
"That's what I was going to say," Hunter sulked.
[Gus yelps. Cut to King leading Luz through the carnival. They stop at the prize booth. The friendship bracelets are still there. King drags Luz onward. Willow and Gus, on the fly, fly up from behind the friendship bracelet frame and follow them. Cut to Luz and King failing at skee-ball. Luz tickles the machines, which lets King successfully throw the ball in. Tickets spew out of the machine/monster as the two cheer. Cut to Gus poking the hairy back of the fly and recoiling in disgust. Willow directs the fly to Luz and King, but they move. The fly lands in the rotten candy machine. Cut to Luz and King at ring toss. One of the bottles hops out of the way of Luz's ring. The attendant shrugs. King shoves a ring over the attendant's body. The attendant reluctantly hands them tickets. Cut to Willow and Gus climbing onto a stand, covered in rotten candy. Willow pants.]
"Gee, now I feel bad for having so much fun while you guys were struggling," Luz said.
"Hey, we were having fun too!" Gus assured her. "Just a different type of fun."
Gus: We can't keep doing this.
[Willow gasps. Camera pans to show a house of mirrors.]
Willow: We won't have to for much longer.
[Cut to the prize booth, where the vendor is counting Luz and King's tickets.]
Prize Vendor: 1230... 1231...
[King squeals.]
Luz: Now, King, before you spend your tickets are you sure you want those friendship bracelets and not this bad boy?
[Luz points to a cursed skull, whose eye glows.]
"Yes, I think friendship bracelets are a much better idea than that, Luz," Camila said. She was getting a distinctly bad feeling from that skull.
Cursed Skull: [Roars.] I am the King of Night. And every breath you take brings you closer to darkness.
"I mean, he's not wrong," Luz pointed out. Camila sighed. This was just one area where she and Luz were going to have to disagree.
[Pause.]
Luz: This guy's a riot.
King: Yes, Luz. I want the bracelets. It's kind of important to me, okay?
Cursed Skull: I can be important to you. I, who have seen the birth and death of countless nations—
Prize Vendor: [Smacks the skull with a broom.] Hey, stop it.
[Cursed Skull whinnies.]
Prize Vendor: No, no. Stop it. Yes, where was I, uh... Well, lost count. Okay, one, two, three, four, five, six...
[The fly drops rotten candy in Luz's hair. She feels it.]
"Very clever, Willow," Camila praised. "Disgusting, but clever."
"That pretty much encapsulates the Boiling Isles right there," Hunter mused.
Luz: Ugh, gross. I'm gonna need a mirror. I'll be right back, King. [Leaves.]
Prize Vendor: 12, 13, 14...
King: Count faster.
[Cut to outside the house of mirrors, which is being pointed to by several arrows on the ground made of rotten candy.]
Luz: Oh. There we go.
[Luz follows the arrows and enters. There are more arrows inside, leading past a wall of mirrors that alter Luz's character design in every one. She reaches the end of the arrows.]
Luz: "You made it". Aw. What a supportive sign. Wait a sec.
[Willow and Gus are reflected in a mirror.]
Luz: Supportive friends!
Willow: Wait, Luz, don't do it!
[Luz runs into the mirror and slides to the ground.]
"I meant to do that," Luz transparently lied.
Luz: Huh?
[Willow's reflection points down. Willow and Gus step forward.]
Luz: Oh, my gosh.
"They told me all about what happened," Luz said. "I was not pleased with King. You'd think living with Eda would teach him not to fall for such a transparent scam."
"Also, trying to make Willow and Gus disappear was wrong," Camila said pointedly.
"Well, yeah. That too."
[Cut to the house of mirrors as King rounds a corner.]
King: Heya, Luz. Good news. I got the bracelets.
Luz: King...
King: Huh?
[Luz holds out her hand, on which are Willow and Gus. King yelps.]
Willow: You splashed us with something to make us small.
Gus: And now I can't go on the big boy rides! You monster.
Hunter just arched an eyebrow. "Hey, I'm really sensitive about my height," Gus defended himself. "Even now I'm short for my age."
King: Y-you weren't supposed to shrink. You, you were supposed to disappear. Ooh, no. Wait.
"Okay, but that's worse," Vee said, deliberately quoting the Good Place, one of her favorite shows. "You get how that's worse, right?"
Luz: What?
King: No, no, no. Luz, I can explain. I wanted to win the bracelets and there was this psychic, see? [Holds out bottle.]
Luz: [Puts Willow and Gus down.] That must've been what did it. Give me the spray bottle, King.
King: No, wait I-I-I gotta explain.
Luz: There's nothing to explain. [Tries to take the bottle.]
"I was so angry!" Luz recalled. "I trusted King and he shrunk my friends! And he thought he was trying to erase them from existence! Which, as you said, Vee, is worse."
King: I was just trying to...
Luz: Shrink my friends?
King: I was just trying to solve my problems.
Luz sighed. She knew what he meant now. She would go to any lengths to solve her own problems. The problem was, she couldn't. Not when she was the problem.
[The bottle slips out of their hands. The spray nozzles loosens, resulting in both Luz and King getting splashed with the potion.]
Luz and King: Uh-oh.
[Luz and King shrink. Willow and Gus walk up to them.]
Willow and Gus: Hi.
King: Wait, I can fix it. Obvioso showed me how. Behold. [Taps cheeks several times.] Why isn't this working?
Tibbles: I'd say it's working quite well.
"Such a shocking turn of events," Vee said sarcastically.
"No, Vee, I think it's actually quite expected," Hunter, who wouldn't know sarcasm if it bit him on the behind, responded.
[Cut to Tibbles approaching his Tent of Tiny Terrors while holding Luz, Willow, Gus, and King. King is still tapping his cheeks.]
Gus: Um, Luz, I think King is broken.
King: Tapping my cheeks is supposed to turn us normal. The psychic told me.
Tibbles: Oh, did he? But, what if he... lied to you from the start? [Summons puff of smoke, is now wearing mustache and patting out "Obvioso's" hat.] Hold on. [Puts hat on.] Lied to you from the start? It's different.
King: You fiend. When Obvioso finds out you stole his mustache... Oh...
"I mean, his name was Obvioso," Gus pointed out. "It was kind, well, obvious."
[Gus facepalms.]
Tibbles: The potion was designed by me. Guess whose cheeks control it?
Luz: Why are you doing this?
Tibbles: [Rips off mustache.] When you destroyed my stand, you destroyed generations of Grimm Hammer history. Now it's time to pay.
[Cut to the inside of the tiny terrors' cage. which they are dropped into.]
All: [Screams.] Oof!
"That fiend," Camila said, shaking her fist. She understood he was angry about having his stand destroyed, but this was no way to behave. She added him to the list of people to get chanclaed. It was getting distressingly long, but Camila wasn't about to let anything get in the way of her vengeance.
Tibbles: Welcome to the greatest show on the Boiling Isles!
[The crowd cheers. All gasp.]
Tibbles: Will these witches and demon survive feeding time? Let's find out!
[Tibbles rings a bell. The tiny terrors growl as they exit their tent. One unicorn still looks friendly.]
Luz: Aw. At least he's still my friend.
[Angry neighing.]
"Unicorns are never one's friends," Hunter said, recalling what Viney had told him from her beast keeping lessons. "They're savage, spiteful creatures who never forget a grudge."
Luz: That's how friends react.
[The tiny terrors growl, then advance.]
Tibbles: You ruined my livelihood. So now, you'll feed my livelihood.
"That doesn't even make any sense!" Vee complained.
[With a twirl of his finger, a spotlight turns on. Curtains open to show the inside of the cage is magnified for the crowd's viewing pleasure. Luz, Willow, Gus, and King are backed into a corner by the manticore and a unicorn.]
Tibbles: Place your bets and enjoy the show!
Gus: Well, if I have to go, at least I'm with my best friends. And King.
[The unicorn whinnies and pounces at them. They all run. The unicorn growls.]
Eda: Caramel Crab Apples. Get 'em hot and pinchy.
"Eda got caught scamming people by the fun police," Luz explained. "Yeah, that's their actual name. Anyway, the head of the carnival put her to work for him."
Man: Hey, over here!
Eda: Yeah, yeah. [Winces.] Hold your spider-horses.
[Gus creates an illusion of a vacuum, causing the animals to cower. Willow summons vines to tip over a water holder.]
"That pig should have known better than to mess with a master of plant magic," Hunter said. Willow blushed.
[The manticore steps through the illusion vacuum. The four take cover behind the water holder seconds before the manticore runs into it.]
Luz: We've gotta—
[Bang.]
Luz: —find a way out of here!
[Another bang. King looks around. Unicorns bite at both ends of the water holder, making Willow and Gus flinch. Luz ducks under the manticore's claws.]
King: Ah, King, you idiot. This is all your fault. [Pulls out friendship bracelets.] But I think I know how to fix it.
[King runs out from cover. A unicorn watches him and chases him.]
Luz: King?
King: Willow, Gus, I'm sorry for poofing you. And Luz, I'm sorry for taking away your friends.
"We forgave him," Willow said. "Like Luz said, he was just a kid. And we kind of had fun too! Kind of."
[A unicorn and the manticore advance on King, growling.]
King: I know you'll eventually go home and now you're spending more time at school. I just... wanna be around you!
And now Luz was home and separated from him and it hurt so much. Even though Luz felt he was better off without her, some selfish part of her really wanted to see him again. To hear an awful bread pun or that squeak of rage. To see her brother. But now he was gone forever and all she was left with were memories of him.
[Luz looks surprised after hearing this as King jumps and dodges all the animals and climbs to the rim of the cage.]
Student #1: No!
Student #2: Boo! Boo!
[Crowd booing.]
"Didn't they understand there were people in there?" Camila demanded. "What is wrong with these people?"
"I think they thought we were illusions," Willow explained. "He's part of the illusions coven. Or so he claims, anyway. Who even knows with a scammer like him?"
Tibbles: [From atop his pile of snails.] No refunds.
[The tiny terrors whimper.]
King: Alright. I only have one shot. [Throws friendship bracelets.] Nyah!
[The bracelets land on Tibbles's cheek.]
Tibbles: Darn flies. [Taps cheek; realizes what he did.] Oh, no.
Camila let out a chuckle. Hoist by his own petard.
[King, Luz, Willow, and Gus all begin to glow. Cut to Eda. The crowd boos.]
Eda: Hey, hey. No discounts, buddy.
Man: You guys owe me. There's nothing happening in this show.
Man #2: Not a single one of those dumb kids have gotten hurt yet.
Eda: Dumb kids? [Turns and sees the screen.] Wait. Those are my dumb kids!
Luz beamed with pride, but there was a melancholy aspect to it too. She missed being Eda's dumb kid. No, wait, she meant kid. Just kid!
[Luz, Gus, Willow, and King grow back to normal size and break the terrarium in the process. Everyone drops to the ground and they sit up. All share look, sighs. Behind them, the animals also grow to full size, making them shocked.]
Luz: You shrunk the animals too?
Tibbles: It's the Tent of Tiny Terrors. Something needed to be tiny.
"No wonder they were so angry," Vee said.
[The crowd boos.]
Man: Finish the job! Get them kids.
"How dare they?!" Camila said. "If I ever run into you in a dark alley, mister, you'd best be hoping you're left with all your limbs still attached!"
Student #3: Feast!
[The student throws a crab apple at the buff unicorn, which catches and eats it. The unicorn looks happy. All animals turn to the crowd, growling. Two audience members share a look. The buff unicorn whinnies and raises a hoof. The animals charge forward as the crowd screams and flees.]
"Well, I'm certainly not going to shed any tears for these people if they get trampled," Camila said. Celebrate her daughter getting hurt, would they?
Tibbles: They... foiled my plans! You will pay for this! [Pulls out another bottle.] This time I'm gonna personally squash you!
[Just then, Eda walks up behind him and she takes the bottle from him.]
Eda: Oh, no, Tibbles. That's not how entertainment works. [Tosses bottle.] The bad guy always gets his just desserts. [Dumps the crab apples on him.]
Tibbles: Oh, no! Not desserts!
"Desserts," Luz said with a smug grin.
Eda: [To the animals.] Hey, girls. This one's on the house.
[The animals stop eating as they all look at Tibbles. One unicorn has a crab apple on their mouth and immediately eats it. Tibbles looks down at his clothes as the unicorns chase him out, screaming.]
"He lived," Luz said, a note of disappointment in her tone.
Willow: Looks like we ruined his life for a second time.
"And we'd do it again too!" Gus said cheerfully.
Gus: We're on a roll.
King: Gus, Willow, you're okay!
Luz: All thanks to you, King. [Kneels down.] Here. [Hands him four cracked pieces of the bracelets.] It was all that was left.
King: [Takes them.] It's... it's okay. Because now there's a piece for everybody. [Holds two out to Willow and Gus.] If you'll accept it, that is?
Willow: Thank you, King.
Gus: Yeah. I've always wanted to own a jagged piece of cheap metal.
"That wasn't sarcasm," Gus said. "I really meant that!"
Luz: That's very sweet.
King: I'm sorry, Luz. Demons do crazy things when they've been missing somebody.
Luz: [Whispers.] And can I tell you a secret? I've been missing you too. [Kisses his skull.]
King: [Giggles.] Hey, we still have a few hours of carnival left. Wanna hit those bumper carcasses?
Luz: You bread my mind.
King: [Laughs.] Yes! Bread puns! Bread puns forever! [Luz puts him down as she turns to Eda.]
Luz: You coming, Eda?
Eda: [Laying on Tibbles's pile of snails.] Nah. I think I got everything I wanted.
[The stands collapse behind Eda.]
Eda: Yep. Another great year at the carnival.
[Cut to the Owl House The door opens, King, Eda, and Luz peek in and stare at Hooty and the fly.]
Camila opened her mouth. "Don't ask," Luz said before she could say a word. "Just…don't." Camila closed her mouth.
Hooty: Sure feel sorry for anyone that missed seeing us two rabble-rousers getting into scrapes.
"I don't," Hunter said.
[Luz, Eda, and King all duck back out with uneasy faces, closing the door.]
"Yet another pointless episode," Hunter complained.
"Hey, mom wanted the whole story," Luz defended herself. "Anyway, don't worry. The next episodes are…pretty darn pointy." It was almost time. She was going to come out in just two more episodes. And even though Luz knew she had nothing to fear, that Camila would love and support her no matter what, she still couldn't help but feel a little terrified.
Camila's stomach rumbled. "Well, we've been at this for a while now. What do you say we break for lunch?" Everyone gave enthusiastic sounds of agreement. "I'm in the mood for cheeseburgers. Bacon cheeseburgers."
