Red: Thank you so much for being patient everyone. Here is the next installation of our main series. Also, for those who think it, SIBLING HARMONY IS NOT CANON TO OUR MAIN SERIES! BUT, there will be SOME separate stories, like Geo's Tall Tales and possibly Loud House Super, we have that ARE canon to out main series. Without further ado, here is The Christmas House 2. Also know that Logan Loud is an an enigma with his true birth origins. There are many secrets about him that, even he himself at first, didn't know about. Let's just say that when it comes to Logan, there's more than meets the eye. Also, Geo is an asshole.
Geo:I SAID I WAS SORRY! Anyway Guys I made a Poll you can Vote on so have fun with that.
It was a snowy day at the Loud House, like REALLY SNOWY! And the Louds, as well their future brother-in-law, were decorating for Christmas while Geo was singing.
"Old Saint Nick's got Bourbon breath
It's so cold you could catch your death
A cop sold me some crystal meth
It's a merry fuckin' Christmas
Everything's so Criss-muss-ee
The streets are twinkling with frozen pee
My priest just sat on Santa's knee
It's a merry fuckin' Christmas
All the kids go to bed each night
To dream what Santa brings 'em
Unless they're Jewish or Muslim
Or some other gyp religion
Crappy toys flyin' off the shelves
Midgets dressed up to look like elves
Spread good cheer or burn in Hell
It's a merry fuckin' Christmas."
As Geo sang, Lucy was wrapping tinsel around the tree, Lynn was hanging the stockings and Lola was on Leni's shoulders hanging lights near the door when Leni fell back and landed on her. "I'm ok." Lola groaned as Geo kept singing.
"Cracklin' fires to keep me warm
And my collection of Asian porn
Cradle my bells and work my horn
It's a keep-on-truckin'
Last-year-suckin'
Midget-chuckin'
Slap-the-puckin'
How-much-wood-could-a-woodchuck-chuckin'
Merrrry fuuuuckin' Christmaaaaaas!"
Geo ended his song while chugging on eggnog. "Hehehehe!" Blake giggled as she clapped her little hands adorably. "Awwwww, see? Blake likes my singing." Geo slurred as he passed out drunk, making Blake laugh louder. "So much for Not Getting Drunk Again" Luna sighed as she picked up Blake and saw Logan chugging down an entire bottle of whiskey while looking at Geo. "Lightweight." He chuckled with a small burp, making Ruby and Lulu giggle in Luan's arms uncontrollably at their father's behavior while the other family members stared at him in disbelief. "What!" He exclaimed.
*Later*
"Is he waking up yet?" Lana asked her sister who had a sharpie. "No not yet." Luna sighed with irritation at her Fiancé who had marker all over his face thanks to the twins.
*Luan*
The jokester was feeding her kids very carefully, specifically Lulu as she was very picky. "Come on Lulu, drink up." She said as she tried to give her daughter her bottle, but she kept turning her head away. "Logan Can you help me please?" She whined loudly as the '17-year-old' entered and took the baby in his arms he gave a smile and rubbed her belly. "Dada!" She cheered adorably making Luan gasp. "What did you say?"
"Dada, Dada!" She said making Luan cry happily. "Mama! Dada!" Lulu exclaimed with a giggle. "YEAH SUCK IT GEO MY KID TALKED BEFORE YOURS!"
"HEY FUCK YO-OW, LUNA!" Geo said as Luna scowled at him. "What was that for?"
"For being a dumbass." She said in a cold voice as she walked away from him Geo rolled his eyes and was about to follow her when he saw Lana outside digging a hole and Lola doing her makeup.
"Lana stop all that digging you're ruining my concentration!" Lola cried out as she kept digging. "So, what? I'm trying to make a reindeer trap!"
"Lana, Santa's reindeer land on rooftops." Leni said.
"...DAMN IT!" She yelled as she started to fill the hole back up. "Oh, don't worry Lana you'll catch one sooner or later I should know, I actually met Santa." Geo spoke. "So did Logan and I."
"Shut up Lincoln, I did it first." Geo said Irritated as he smacked him upside the head. "Also, I think Lucy is waiting beneath the mistletoe in her room for you." He told him in a teasing tone as Lincoln blushed and slowly walked away into the house. "Anyway, Lana I met Santa years ago." Geo told her in a whimsical voice as she looked at him with sparkling eyes.
"Really Geo…Santa?"
"Shut up Lola, you and Lori are on the Naughty List." He snapped.
"HAH!"
"Lynn, you're on thin ice with him for the Luck incident and being a sore winner. You literally JUST got back on the Nice List."
"Aw." The sporty girl frowned as Geo sighed with a smile. "Anyway, I help him sort out presents almost every year." Geo explained. "That's awesome!" Lana said in awe. "And Red pilots the Sleigh, and together we help him deliver the presents."
"Going down those chimneys is some Super Mario shit." Said man groaned in annoyance. "What about Lincoln?"
"Oh, he makes sure that the presents don't fall out of the sleigh." Logan spoke. "Wait, where is the little shit?" He asked in a confused voice. "Don't know, don't care." " Luna spoke in a sour tone "Okay, why are you in a bitchy mood?" Lori snapped. "I don't have to explain anything to you."
"Yes, you do, she and I are in charge." Logan threatened. "Grrrrr, fuck this!" Luna scowled as she stomped upstairs, or tried to until she fell face first on the ground. The siblings and Geo all turned their heads to glare at Logan and Lynn, who both had blow-darts behind their backs. "I'll take her upstairs and talk to her." Geo said in annoyance and Lynn and Logan did a hi-five.
*Luan*
The clown yawned as she headed for the kitchen for some food for herself.
*CRASH!*
"Huh?" She said curiously. "LOLA!" Said the person you totally know would shout her name angrily. "It wasn't me!"
"I SAW YOU DO IT!" Logan yelled as he chased her. "Oh, Logan sweetie can you come here?" She said tiredly as he appeared in front of her with Lola hogtied over his shoulder. "Sure Love." He said innocently as he dropped the brat on the table. "Follow me, I wanna give you your present early." She said with her eyes half open and a cheeky smirk as he followed her to her room where he saw Maggie blushing as she had on only a large ribbon over her naked body, covering her large, swollen, dollar coin size nipples and another covering her dripping pussy.
"...I really have nothing to say to this." Logan said with Saitama eyes and a bulge in his pants.
"...so, you...don't like it?" Maggie spoke sadly with an adorable frown as he went over and hugged her. "I never said that." He smiled as she kissed him softly, moaning as their tongues touched.
*Luna*
"Babe, what is your problem?" Geo asked Luna who was barely awake from the two tranquilizer darts fired into her neck as she sat up on her bed and gave a sigh.
"I...I don't know." She said as Geo tugged her tightly. "Tell me."
"...I miss Sam." She muttered.
"What?"
"I miss her!" She cried loudly. "She promised we'd spend the last week before Christmas together, but she lied! She Just didn't want to see me!"
"Luna, that's not true." He whispered while kissing her forehead ever so gently. "Geo I wish...I... I wish." Luna spoke as Geo gently put a finger on her lips and started singing.
"There's always tomorrow,
For dreams to come true,
Believe in your dreams
Come what may." He sang softly as he held her
"There's always tomorrow,
With so much to do,
And so little time in a day. "
Luna started to calm herself and hug Geo tightly.
"We all pretend
The rainbow has an end
And you'll be there my friend someday.
There's always tomorrow,
For dreams to come true,
Tomorrow is not far away.
We all pretend,
The rainbow has an end,
And you'll be there my friend someday.
There's always tomorrow,
For dreams to come true,
Tomorrow is not far away. "
Geo finished his gentle song and kissed her forehead. "Thanks babe I needed that." Luna muttered happily as he wiped her tears and kissed her deeply and passionately.
*The next day*
We see Lincoln in his bed waking up from a night with Lucy. "Lucy wake up." He whispered into her ear. "Hmmmm, 5 more years." She groaned happily as Lincoln chuckled and kissed her forehead softly. "Come on." He told her.
"Ugh, fine." She groaned softly as she sat up and smiled tiredly before planting her lips on his.
*Logan*
"Where is that little shit?" Logan growled with a rolled-up newspaper in his hand as he slowly moved around the living room. "Lana come out now!" He roared as she appeared behind him. "Yeah?"
"There's a Redback in the living room."
"Male or female?"
"Who cares! It's a venomous spider and needs to die."
"You Know the males venom isn't fatal, right? It's the females you gotta worry about."
"Tell that to the banana spider. Just help me kill it!"
"Fine." Lana said as she reached under the couch, pulled out a shotgun and pumped the barrel.
*Luan*
Luan heard a shotgun go off beneath her. "Oh boy." She groaned in annoyance before getting up and going downstairs.
"Lana, DROP THAT NOW!" Luan shouted. "Sorry sis, there's a deadly spider in this room, and mama's gotta end it." She said while pumping the barrel and aiming for the clock which had a very large spider on it.
*BANG!*
"GOT IT!" Lana cheered as the tree fell over for some reason.
*Leni*
We see the ditzy blonde with Geo at the mall shopping for presents and food.
"Leni! How about this?" Geo spoke picking up a scarf that was a rich purple color. "Ooooh perfect!" She squealed happily as she took the scarf and placed it in the bag with several dozen…okay, thousand, items. "Let's see what else we can find!" She said happily as Geo followed her at a fast speed and started to sing beautifully.
"Oh, it's drawing very near, my favorite time of year!"
"The snow is falling and the cold wind blows." Geo added.
"Christmas is almost here!" They both cheered.
And I know that Santa, Santa, Santa has his jolly little eyes on me, it keeps me warm and filled with glee to know Santa has his eyes on me!" Leni then jumped on an escalator. I light my house like a Christmas tree.
*Fa-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-lee*
'Cause Santa, Santa, Santa has his jolly little (toot toot) eyes on me!"
We cut to Geo who was Finishing his shopping. "Let's go Leni!" He exclaimed.
*Logan*
Logan was now fixing the tree as he heard his phone ring loudly, while the most famous of internet memes played. "And I say, HEYYEYAAEYAAAEYAEYAA-"
"Hello?"
"Dude." Geo said on the other end with excitement. "Yeah what is it?" He said in an annoyed voice.
*Lincoln*
"Ready Lily?" Lincoln asked softly with the little girl in a sled. "Yeah let's go!" She cheered with her adorable speech as they both went down the large makeshift mountain of snow made by Lisa. "WHEEEEEEEEEE!" They both cheered as they went down the hill and flew into Mr. Grouse's yard. "LOUDS!" The old man yelled angrily as the two siblings ran off.
*Luan*
Luan cried softly as she looked at her closet, sad that she couldn't do any Christmas pranks, or any pranks any time of the year…EVER AGAIN! "Stupid Logan, not my fault I get carried away."
"Mama?" Lulu squeaked as she crawled over to her with her big eyes shining and a smile on her little face. "Hey there sweetie." Luan cooed softly as she picked her up and rocked her in her arms. "Mama loves you so much." She told her softly while tickling her belly making her giggle.
*Lincoln*
"That was awesome!" He cheered excitedly as Lily agreed happily. "Let's go again!" She laughed loudly as she pushed herself up and hugged her brother tightly.
*That night*
We now see all the Louds and Geo sitting on the roof of the Loud House. "What a great day, huh guys?" Geo yawned.
"Yeah." Lana said as she climbed on his shoulders. "Hey, I have an idea. Let's all go for a walk." Geo suddenly said.
"Yeah I second that!" Logan added happily while picking up both of his kids who giggled and held onto his arms as he jumped down onto a glitter covered pile of snow. "MY SNOWMAN!" Lola cried. "HAH!" Lana laughed with Logan loudly.
*Park*
Logan started to hum with Geo as he started to sing., scaring the sibling as he only ever sang when he was REALLY MAD, how mad? Trust us, you DON'T WANNA KNOW!
Geo: Christmas time is here; there's a tingle in the air.
Logan: I sat on a park bench, and froze my derriere.
Leni: We're all hang stockings drinking Coco-OH MY GOSH IT'S SNOWING!
Lynn: Santa's Bringing tons of loot, we've got Christmas spirit blowing!
*Lincoln is seen cuddling with Lucy as a smile crept onto her pale face*
Maggie: It's the time of year we try to drop our negativity.
*Maggie sang as a TV-sized balloon popped and covered her in glitter*
Lola: I just dropped a Glitter-Bomb to make the town more Christmas-y!
*Maggie growls and starts to chase the little shit with the intent to kill*
Leni: Christmas time can be so hectic. Shopping malls can b-b-be so rough,
Lana: But it's the best of all the holidays,
Lola: Because we get new stuff!
Lynn: I got sick on Halloween,
*She sang as she threw up*
Lori: New Years was an awful scene!
*Lori is seen punching Clyde in the face*
Geo: And Thanksgiving was a snore.
Lana & Lola: Christmas, Christmas, we want more.
Lucy: Yuletide by the fireplace,
Logan: I am gonna stuff my face,
Ronnie-Anne: Punch the clock and close the school.
That's the reason Christmas—
Everyone: RULES!
Lisa: All the buildings look like igloos,
*Darcy appears and wraps her arms around the genius who blushed*
Darcy: White, majestic winter castles.
Leni: We can wear our Christmas sweaters,
Lola: And our cool-offs with gold tassels!
Luna: Therefore so, Christmas is great!
*Sam appears from inside a snowman and hugs Luna tightly with a bright smile*
Sam: This ain't no time to playa hate.
*Lola pops in between Geo and Logan who are walking into the town square*
Lola: All you gotta have is faith,
Logan: What a lovely Christmas wraith.
Geo: You mean "wreath"?
Logan: No, I mean "wraith".
*Logan points up towards a female wraith dressed as Santa flying over the city on a dragon*
Lola: AHHHHHHHHHH!
*Geo glares at Logan who just smiles ever so innocently*
Lucy: Whoa, was that a wraith?
Logan: yeah, thank Morgan for agreeing.
Lucy: Wicked.
*The two share a fist-bump as Geo gives an annoyed sigh*
*Haiku steps out of her home to see a blinding light with Lincoln in front of it by Lucy*
Haiku: My holiday depression has been lifted by this lovely sight,
Lincoln and Lucy: How can one be sad with 50,000 watts of Christmas light?
Leni: There's so many holidays! What the heck is Arbor Day?
*Maggie is working at a coffee shop with large bags under her eyes and her hair in a complete mess*
Maggie: I just know I work that day. Gimme Christmas any day!
Bobby: Yuletide by the fireplace,
*Bobby then shows Lori a ring and she tackles and kisses him*
Logan & Lana: (mouths full) I am gonna stuff my face,
Ronnie-Anne: Punch the clock and close the schools.
Kids: That's the reason Christmas—
Everyone: RULES!
Leni: I Love all the shiny ball,
Rita: Children bouncing off the walls,
Lynn: Blinking lights we got on sale!
*The tree catches on fire as Geo puts it out*
Geo: Silver tinsel by the bail,
Lola: Semi-Frozen river skating!
*Lola sang as she fell through the ice*
Lisa: Candy cane self-medicating,
Logan: Taking back gifts that we hate!
*He sang as he held a gift that said To Logan, from Clyde*
Clyde: Fifteen pounds of winter weight,
Leni: Fluffy quilts with Christmas cats,
*Leni holds up Cliff who was wrapped in a quilt covered in cats*
Sam: Ten-pound Russian winter hats,
Rita: Fruitcakes that are gluten-free,
Logan: Eggnog by the gallon, WEEEEEE!
*Logan drunkenly chugs down large water jugs full of eggnog*
Geo: Brand new cars with giant bows,
*Geo pulls a tarp to reveal a new Honda for Luna who kisses him*
Lincoln: Holiday-themed laser shows,
*Lincoln presses a button that activates said thing with the words 'I love you' prominent in a Christmas tree while Lucy kissed him with Haiku, Ronnie, Jordan, Beatrix and Cristina*
Jordan & Beatrix: Roasted chicken, Christmas trees,
Carlota: Cheddar cheese nativities.
*All of them can be seen on top of a bus which Lori drove*
Everyone: CHRISTMAS KARAOKE BUS HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO US!
They all Sang as the Bus drove off with Logan and Geo standing at the front of the bus. "MERRY FUCKING CHRISTMAS!"
