Chapter 24: The Wolves
Riley could only hope that the path to their house was clear enough. It was difficult to get through the gap that had walkers clawing their way inside, but she was so focused on getting inside that she acted on instinct, ducking and dodging until she was inside. Carl wasn't far behind her and the blood splatters on his shirt indicated his fight with the dead trying to get at them. Though there were a few walkers inside, the scene before them was a completely different warzone.
Instead of the dead, there were alive ones. Ones that were going up to and killing anyone that got close. Her stomach churned when she spotted one in particular in the middle of the road, cutting up his victim into multiple pieces with a knife. The sight sent bile rising up her throat, but she swallowed it down.
Quickly, she ducked down behind a bush, her heart hammering against her ribcage as she tried to figure out what she needed to do. They needed to get to Judith but they couldn't just let all of these people die.
"We can't be out in the open. We don't know how many there are," Carl panted. "Get to Judith, help anyone on the way. You ready?"
He took the thoughts right out of her head. Letting out a shuddering breath, she nodded and peered out from behind the bush, her stomach convulsing inside her as she saw the gore.
"Yeah. Yeah let's go," she breathed, springing from her spot and darting to the next bit of cover.
The two of them moved from bush to bush until they reached the first house that they could hide behind. She gripped the bottom of the porch, taking a look to see what the area up ahead was like. It seemed similar to what they just experience - savages playing with the guts of their victims.
A few of the citizens were running around being chased by these guys and her heart sank. They didn't know how to deal with them. She never liked killing ever since she experienced it in Terminus, but if it was between herself and one of these guys...she'd save herself any day of the week.
She was just about to speak when the overwhelming feeling of dread started to choke her...it wasn't until she was on the ground that she realized she was literally being choked. It happened so quickly that she couldn't have predicted it and she was suddenly struggling to breathe.
The man towering over her wore grime all over his body with grease-filled dark locks and a yellowing smile. However, the most noticeable thing about him was the fact that there was a huge, pink scar on his forehead in the shape of a "W", like someone had carved it into his flesh.
She couldn't even breathe out for Carl's help, but he noticed faster than she ever would, since as soon as he turned, he was launching himself at the man on top of her. He barely moved, being much larger and stronger than Carl, but it did surprise him enough that his grip on her neck loosened.
Choking in a breath of air, a wave of adrenaline hit her and sent her writhing until she broke free of his grip. She coughed violently, rolling away and grabbing for the knife in her jeans. The fight had switched from her to Carl and the two boys wrestled on the ground for the upper hand. Unfortunately, it looked like this guy had gotten a hold of a knife and was desperately trying to jab the squirming teen right in the eye. Heart jumping to her throat, she scrambled toward them, reaching out to latch onto the man's arm, but he saw her coming and swung at her.
Instinctively, she put up her arm to block and realized too late it was a bad idea. The blade sliced through her forearm, leaving a bleeding gash in its wake. A pained whine escaped her lips and she immediately recoiled.
"Riley!"
Carl's attention had been directed to her at the sudden injury and she swore because she knew his loss of focus might have deadly consequences if this guy tried stabbing him again. She was partially right, as he was barely able to avoid the knife as it plunged into the grass mere centimeters away from his neck.
Despite her throbbing injury, she pushed herself to stand, fingers curling tightly around her knife as she jumped into action once more. She landed on his back and with shaking hands, grabbed onto his hair and yanked as hard as she could. His head tilted backwards as he roared in pain and she grimaced, shifting the knife downward and embedding it in his throat. She tore it across the flesh and bone in one fluid motion, only pulling the blade out when she heard his gurgling breaths cease.
Carl slid out from under the limp body and she let go of his hair, collapsing to the side of the body and trying not to shake as she stared at the man. She forgot how hard and traumatizing killing was and the only reason she had been able to do it was because Carl's life was on the line.
She took in deep breaths, averting her eyes from the scene as he came up to her to check her arm.
"A-are you o-okay? That l-looks pretty d-deep," he fussed, failing to hide the shakiness in his voice as he examined her arm.
"Fine," she whispered, retracting her arm from his grip as it continued to bleed in a steady flow.
Flashbacks of Terminus unearthed themselves from the depths of her mind and she squeezed her eyes shut. What were the words Michonne told her? Don't hesitate. People like that are the real monsters of this world. Don't hesitate. Don't hesitate...
"Riley, hey..."
His voice snapped her eyes open and she looked at him, realizing her hands were gripping the end of his shirt lightly.
"It's okay. You did what you had to. It's okay to...people like that are trying to hurt us. Sometimes you have to. You're okay. You can do this. Just breathe," he murmured, his hands resting at her jawline to keep her gaze steady on his. "We can do this. Together."
He leaned over and pressed a quick, chaste kiss on her forehead before standing and offering her a hand. She gingerly took it, taking steady breaths and focusing on what he had said and what she needed to do. They could finish this together. Get to Judith. Keep her safe.
He didn't let go of her hand and it kept her grounded as they continued forward. This time, she kept her gun out and ready. It was a good thing she did because as they weaved through the destruction and bodies, they came across several more of these guys. None of them ever had guns, which made it easy for her to take a shot in his shoulder or leg. She had no problem maiming. It was just the killing that got to her and made her realize how powerful human beings actually were.
Carl's hand holding hers tightly and the fresh oxygen that entered her lungs as they ran kept her going and focused.
Near the back of the community was their house, which seemed untouched compared to everything near the gate. Maybe they were lucky. They had to be. If anything happened to Judith, it would be their fault. They weren't supposed to be out of Alexandria. If they had been here, they could have prevented anything happening to her. She's fine. Nothing has happened to her...
Reaching the door, she let go of his hand and he burst through. They were met with the barrel of a gun and she nearly jumped out of her skin, but the owner of the gun realized who they were and relaxed. Enid.
"Where have you been? You left Judith...," she pointed out, moving aside to let them in.
Riley quickly locked the door and let out a shaky breath. "Long story. Is she okay?"
"Yeah, she's fine...look I came here to tell you guys something..."
"It can wait. We need to secure the house and make sure they don't get in," Carl interrupted, shoving the curtains shut to several of the windows.
"No I have to... I have to go."
He paused, turning to look at her for a moment before dismissing her seriousness. "No, you need to stay here. We need you."
Riley nodded slightly. "We do. Just...stay until this is over."
The girl seemed somewhat frustrated, but she gave in with a nod and eventually started to help close the curtains and lock the doors and windows. She had almost forgotten about her bleeding injury until Enid pointed it out, prompting Carl to become protective and scramble to find something to bind it with. He returned with a towel and with the other girl's help, they wrapped it snugly around her arm to stop the bleeding.
When they were done, the three of them decided to sit down in the middle of the room with their backs to each other and each of them facing a different direction. They barely even had the chance to sit down when she spotted movement just outside the house. Each of them jumped to their feet and she went toward the window, spotting Ron sprinting away from one of the W men chasing after him with a knife.
"Shit," Carl swore, taking a moment to duck behind the couch and retrieve an automatic rifle before he burst out the door to help.
She and Enid followed swiftly after, keeping a slight distance as he shot the man in the leg and sent him sprawling int the grass. Ron skidded to a stop, panting and looking at Carl with wide eyes.
"Please, please don't kill me man!" the guy on the ground pleaded. "My leg, please..."
"Wait Carl!" He was bluffing. She could see it in his face. And she was proven correct when he grabbed a hold of Carl's leg.
She raised her gun, hands shaky as she fired a shot right at the guy's head. Her skin crawled and Carl shot a worried glance over his shoulder at her.
"Come inside," he breathed, looking up at Ron. "I can keep you safe."
Ron's lips formed a tight line and he shot a glare at her and Enid in the background, shaking his head. "No."
And with that he was taking off, leaving the three of them behind. She breathed raggedly, still slightly shaken from her second kill that day. "Carl..."
He turned roughly, gritting his teeth and heading for the door. Swallowing thickly, she followed after him, not looking back until they got back inside the house. She settled on the floor again. Through all the confusion, she didn't even realize that Enid was missing until Carl pointed it out.
"Hey...do you know where Enid went?" he asked, tapping her shoulder gently.
She blinked, looking over at him and then taking a quick glance around the room. "N-no? I thought she was here..."
A sinking feeling fell into the pit of her stomach and she let her head drop. She left. It was obvious. Didn't even stay to help...
Something white near her boot caught her attention and she shuffled sideways, picking up the little piece of paper and noticing what was written on it. Just survive somehow. She read the words over a few times, branding them into her brain. Just survive somehow. Whether that was running away or resorting to killing... just survive somehow...
Gingerly, she nudged him and passed him the paper. He took it and glanced at it, his chest deflating slightly before he handed it back to her.
"Here. You should keep it," he suggested, resting his arms on his knees.
She folded the piece of paper and pocketed it. Maybe it would come in handy sometime in the future...
With that in mind, she settled back to her original position, resting her back against his as they kept watch and waited for things to die down. Eventually, the screams and gunfire ceased and they were left with an eerie silence. That was, until a faint screaming to open the gates reached their ears.
She stood, taking a look out of the window and spotting the familiar figure of Rick running through the gate just before it shut out a whole herd of walkers.
"It's your dad!" she exclaimed, pushing away from the window and heading for the door.
The two of them barged out of the house, running forward to figure out what was going on. As soon as Rick saw his son, he moved forward to engulf him in a hug.
"Is Judith safe?" he asked, pulling away slightly.
"Yeah. Me and Riley kept the house secure," Carl responded, taking a step back.
Rick then did something she was quite surprised of. He gave her a thankful look and then pulled her into a hug as well. They had never really been particularly close and their relationship had been a bit awkward ever since she and Carl started to become more than friends, but this was a new turn.
She returned the hug before pulling away and he put a hand on her shoulder and thanked her. A tiny smile formed on her lips and she nodded in response.
A small crowd of whoever was left began to form and Rick turned his attention to them.
"You can hear it. Some of you saw it. They got back here. Half of them," he started, pacing around the group. "Still enough to surround us twenty deep. Look I know you're scared. You haven't seen anything like this. You haven't been through anything like this. But we're safe for now. The panel the truck hit seems in tact. We reinforced it just in case. Either way the wall's gonna hold together. Can you?"
A few of the others tried to hold back tears at the realization of this all and she felt a bit sorry for them. They didn't know what this was like.
"The others, they're going to be back. Daryl, Abraham, Sasha... They have vehicles. They're going to lead them away just like the others. And Glenn and Nicholas are going to walk through the front gate just after. They know what they're doing. And we know what we need to do. We keep noise to a minimum. Pull out blinds at night - even better keep the lights out. We try to make this place as quiet as a graveyard. See if they move on," Rick continued, only to be interrupted by another.
"This place is a graveyard..."
A small stretch of silence settled between them all and she looked down, realizing this was somewhat true. But they were still alive.
Aaron moved forward and decided to share his confidence in Rick and the fact that he was pretty sure it was his fault he led the W men back here. Riley gritted her teeth and let out a shaky breath and for a moment she wasn't sure how she felt about Aaron. He didn't know what would happen but the fact that there was someone to blame...well it just made her instinctively want to blame.
Soon after Rick's speech, they all scattered. Some seeming in a full-fledged panic, others trying to cope with what was going on. She needed to go lay down. Think some more. Try and get some of these thoughts out of her head.
"Hey, you go ahead. I'm gonna try and find Ron. If you need me, come and find me," Carl said suddenly, brushing her hand lightly.
"Okay... Be careful. Please..." She reached for her knife and then placed it in his palm, curling his fingers around it and giving his hand a squeeze.
She headed back to the house, rubbing her temples and trying to clear her head. It felt like she had so many voices going on at once and she could hardly take it. When she entered the house, she immediately headed for the couch and fell backwards onto it, breathing out a sigh and staring up at the ceiling. She didn't feel like this was helping her at all. She wanted to rest but the swirling thoughts in her brain didn't cease. Somehow, she needed to get them out.
Sitting up, she took a brief look around the room. Her eyes landed on the bookshelf across from her. Standing, she moved across the room, sliding her fingers across each book and looking for something in particular. A small bit of relief flooded her chest when she found a small notebook and she pulled it free from the constraint of the other books. She thumbed through the pages to see that there were a few notes in the beginning, something about the community probably from the creation of it. However, whoever it was that wrote in it didn't need it anymore so she decided to take ownership.
She tore out the pages so she had a fresh start and then padded to the kitchen to try and find something to write with. In one of the drawers, she found an old pen and with that in hand, she settled back down on the couch and opened up to the first page. How did she even start to write? She just wanted to get all of her thoughts out. If someone found it, they would know her story, too. So maybe she should write it to whoever may find it? Or even to someone she knew... Carl or Glenn or Maggie? No, she wasn't ready to share all of this just yet...but maybe someday she would be.
'I'm so angry-'
No, that didn't sound right.
'Glenn might be-'
'I can't-'
She let out a shaky breath, closing her eyes and trying to work out her thoughts as the pen flew across the paper to cross everything out.
'It's difficult for me to express my feelings...but I'm gonna try.'
Sinking further into the couch, she bit down on her lip, trying to formulate her next words. Maybe she just needed to start from the beginning...
'In those first three seconds, you learn something about yourself.
One. You learn that you are not as tough as you make yourself out to be. You are weak.
Two. You learn that the people you don't care for actually mean something to you.
Three. You learn that you don't want these people gone; you don't want to be alone.
And then you're either lucky, or you're not. If you're lucky, you get to live to see another day. You get to escape the rotting bodies that want nothing more than to tear into your flesh. If you're not, you get overwhelmed by the dead and then it's over.
I'm one of the lucky ones.
I am Riley and this is my story.'
She paused, tapping her pen lightly on the corner of the page. What to get off her chest first? As soon as she thought of that, she knew what she needed to write.
'I'm upset about...
No I'm scared for Glenn. He didn't come back with the others. I don't like people knowing I'm afraid so I haven't said anything to anyone, but I should probably talk to Maggie. She's probably taking it the worst. I know that Glenn is capable but that doesn't mean I'm still not afraid. He and Maggie have become my friends... Maybe even...
They're like siblings. Maybe even parents. I don't know, I can't figure out the feelings that I'm feeling. I've never been good at that...'
As every word branded itself on the paper, she felt her mind becoming clearer and the weight on her shoulders lifting. She couldn't keep all of her feelings inside, even though she hated to let them out.
'I also had to kill some people again today. It shouldn't get me as upset as it does, but I just freeze up. I'm killing a human being. Taking a life. The walkers...they're not living. But people, they are, no matter what they've done. I'll always protect myself or the people I care about, even if it means killing... But I don't know if I'm ever going to get used to it. The only reason I could even keep moving was Carl.
I just-
I'm...
All he did was hold my hand and it somehow focused me. I needed to protect him and everyone else and he made me realize that. I never thought...
I need him. I hate needing anyone but...
I need him.'
Her breath escaped her lungs as she reread her messy script over again. How could she have come to rely on him and everyone else so heavily? She told herself she wouldn't...
Maybe it was just impossible to be alone in this world. Whether that was a good thing or not, she hadn't determined yet.
A/N: I updated again yayyy! A little bit later than I should have but it's still up! Thank you guys for your massive support on the last chapter! I'm so grateful for you guys and so glad you're loving the story! Your reviews always make my day and I love to hear your feedback! :) This chapter was a bit heavy but also not at the same time. We're getting toward the really good stuff coming up so buckle your seatbelts!
Also I just want to remind you guys of the poll on my profile! I'm wanting to see if you guys want me to make a Twitter for this story or not to help keep you guys updated on what's happening with it as well as posting additional content such as songs for the story, pictures, art, etc. If I get at least 10 yes responses, I'll know that enough people want it so I'll go ahead and make it :)
I'm also considering making a Daryl/Oc (well it's going to be made, just not sure when) story as well. Would any of you be interested in that? The more interest, the more I'll go ahead and start planning it out so it can be put up sooner :)
Anyway, thank you guys so much for the reviews and follows and I really hope you enjoyed this chapter! :)
