CHAPTER XVIII
"I need all of you to do your best in order to deal with the patients arriving here shortly" the doctor said to all the personnel "It's a large number so you all have to hold steady and ask for help if you cannot handle a situation. And last but not least, prioritize according to gravity and we'll be able to help them all" he nodded encouragingly to the many faces staring at him, but right before he turned, a female's voice got everyone's attention.
"The Brigade should go to one wing or floor of the building and the Corps to another so we may divide and hopefully choose one to work at, don't you think?" Elia didn't know the nurse because she was part of the support teams that came from Ehrmich's hospital with the Brigade. She wouldn't have believed the colleague had said such thing hadn't she heard her just now "I believe helping those who insist on dying continuously it's a waste of time".
The healer clenched her fists in anger, but to quarrel with someone like that was the actual waste of time. And judging by the doctor's indignant expression, she could tell he had a similar opinion.
"I didn't know medical personnel got to choose their patients according to their preferences" he commented sarcastically and then looked to all, deadly serious "Do not forget all of you are here to help, not to judge".
"But sir..." the stubborn stranger insisted.
"That's what real vocation is. If that's not the case for some of you, the best you could do is leave now. I won't rely on people whom I cannot trust to do their job" Elia noticed the group where this woman was began to look at each other nervously at the warning. They all knew this could mean suspension due to negligence.
No one in the crowd said a word, and the only thing this absurd woman did was getting as red as a tomato before looking at the floor, embarrassed yet not remorseful. And as soon as the doctor left, Elia heard conversations of all kinds. Some were as surprised as she was with that attitude and others agreeing to it, which she wasn't in the mood to listen to. She walked outside the room after getting her apron, mask, and gloves and wait for her team outside.
"Will you be all right, dear?" A worried, familiar voice approached from behind, and she saw her mentor putting on a scarf, ready to leave.
"Sure, Gris" she assured her with a sober smile "It'll the first time I won't have you by my side, but I know I can do it because I've done it before, so don't worry" the older woman had received other instructions and she was going to be taken somewhere.
"I know you'll do fine. I just can't help getting anxious when I hear nonsense like the one just now" the woman was adjusting her jacket and checking the doctor's bag now "To know for example, that my son could have been alive and injured but someone refuses to lend him a hand simply because of his division… What good is having some knowledge if you're an ignorant, heartless person?" Griselda was very mad. And she didn't even like the scouts that much.
"Don't waste time and energy thinking about it. We can't change those who are a little rotten on the inside. Besides, I don't think they'll neglect the patients, not after that warning" the healer said and observed how, some of her comrades were leaving the room where she'd just been, and the groups were heading to their respectful destinations. Just when she was about to say goodbye, another voice interrupted her.
"Mrs. Green, we're ready to leave" both women turned when Dr. Nowak called on the senior nurse and headed out of the building.
"See you later, dear" Griselda said, and she only nodded at her.
When Elia turned to follow her own group, she suspected that if they were taking someone like Griselda, one of their best, most experienced nurses alongside one of their renown doctors, it could only mean that an important officer might require special care. And she only hoped it wasn't him.
Two days had passed after that incident and the return of human forces, four since hell broke loose inside the walls; it was still hard to believe… A titan's fight inside Stohess, and a simultaneous warning of a breach though this time, directly into Wall Rose. It was a total chaos. The only improvement was that this time, the militia had been somewhat more organized regarding evacuation procedures and soon after all started, civilians from the compromised territory and most of Trost's inhabitants, except military and medical personnel, had been moved to Ehrmich and the Underground City.
Meanwhile, soldiers from both, the Garrison and Brigade joined to an expedition for the first time, which was really something. The atrocious part of it was the number casualties; it had been as bad as expected, especially from ranks outside the Legion.
The healer had been scared for Garrett but he miraculously made it back alive. A dislocated shoulder and minor bruises were all he got but to come back in one piece was quite an achievement for someone who'd never fought titans. Not that he was useless, but facing those monsters, skilled or not, was a huge deal.
Surprisingly, it was thanks to him she also found out that Captain Levi wasn't among the forces. And that had calmed her spirits, considering she'd treated his sprained ankle only six days ago, and how self-defeating would be for him to force movement on it so soon. Sure, the soldier was more than capable of fighting even with that, but it'd be reckless to risk humanity's strongest, as Ilva used to call him. Although, deep down and even when Elia didn't want to think about it, to conceive a world where he no longer existed was awfully discouraging, and in her case, it had nothing to do with the war.
Now, out of the hospital and on her way home, she looked up to the sky, quite thankful that this situation was near its end. Working for over thirty-eight hours with no decent rest would exhaust anybody. The demand had been so high that it was then the doctor determined she no loger needed supervision.
When she finally turned the corner of her street and caught sight of her house, her body relaxed. She yawned and covered her mouth while she opened the door to her bathroom, dying for a shower before having a light dinner and bedtime. But the instant she sat down and had her food, she leaned forward and crossed her arms onto the table, allowing her chin to rest on them for a while. The healer sighed and thought about the couple things Garrett got to share with her the previous day.
"There was no breach this time" he said, dejectedly, and worried "Which no one can understand. Well, except for Commander Erwin. The man seems to always know more than all of us combined. You should have seen him, Elia. Especially when he was being dragged by the creature with his arm in its jaw, and the only thing he shouted to all the remaining forces was the order to continue the mission and get the titan kid back. We couldn't believe our eyes".
"I do. That man is worth following, to whatever end. And it'd be an honor to die beside him… that's what Ilva said about him" Elia shared, and her friend was staggered. He knew her sister would never praise someone less deserving "On another hand, don't get me wrong, I'm really happy to see you alright but I still don't understand how you came back. You just said you went deep into Maria's territory, you were surrounded and the Scouts leader had been badly injured… how did you do it?"
"I guess now's the part where I must admit that Erwin was right to save the boy from being killed when we first discovered his powers" he looked down, to his arm in a sling "We don't know how he did it, but out of nowhere, he got to command titans and it was how we escaped. He did something and sent them over the enemy. After that, the ones we encounter along the way just ignored us".
Their brief exchanged came to an end soon when she'd been called. She resolved not going to try gossip about it, so she'd stayed away to allow him a good rest. But that conversation gave her a hint as to where Griselda probably was, of whom she hadn't heard or seen since the incident with the nurse.
Half an hour later and now laying on her own bed, she let her mind to wander, hoping to fall asleep at any time. At least he obeyed the Commander, she thought distractedly while she stared at the ceiling, feeling relieved. A sensation that didn't last long when she thought about the frightening prospect of Commander Erwin's condition. That man was like the beating heart of the Corps, not just a good leader but probably the best they've come to have. Losing him would be as bad as if it were the man she feared for.
Elia unconsciously took her fingers to her mouth, where the ghost of his lips remained. And despite she knew it was a thing of the past, that memory would never leave her, not even now that she closed her eyes and tried not to think about it. His warmth, and demanding but still somewhat gentle kiss, had awoken something she'd honestly never thought about.
Really girl? You're fantasizing with Captain Levi now? her inner self scolded her. You better stop that, or it'll be late for you. You've managed to cope with grief lately, but adding a broken heart is the last thing I'd recommend you dive into"
She knew that. She really did, but sometimes it was inevitable to think about it, yearning his quiet but comforting company, and the things they used to chat about. Elia doubted he was the kind of person who'd play with other's feelings. The man really didn't have that in him; his blue-steel eyes were just as straightforward as himself, not to mention he was exactly the kind of people who wouldn't like to waste his time. No, the broken heart her conscious was referring to, was the very high possibility of losing him to this war, just the way she lost her entire family as well as her best friend.
By the time her eyes finally gave in, the last image in her mind was the letter he'd signed. His present to Ilva, the one she kept in the drawer under her sister's uniform. And the reason behind was that, whether she wanted to see it or not, that precise moment had been the one he'd won her heart over, irrevocably.
Despite the woman knew she'd have to go back to the Legion's HQ during the afternoon, she decided to make sure there were no setbacks in the past hours concerning that man's recovery. Hopefully, he'd spent a decent night compared to the previous one after they tended his wound. Specially because he'd been feverish and restless during the first five hours after they'd cleaned, disinfected, and sutured the area. His temperature stabilized eventually with the medicines, although thanks to anesthesia, he'd been knocked down ever since. Still, if there was one thing Griselda was sure of, was that he'd survive this just fine; the man was as strong and resilient as a bull.
She was also glad that these people had listened to her advice on assigning him a carer, in case of possible negative changes; she'd have chosen somebody with medical knowledge, but they were running short on personnel since a large number of their soldiers were at the hospital. Therefore, this young man, who happened to be Commander Erwin's assistant, was the only option before leaving.
It was about seven in the morning now, and the place had enough movement in the hallways she passed by. When she reached the right door, she knocked on it twice and waited in silence, listening to the steps coming in her direction, to find the young lad's face emerging, relieved to see her.
"Morning, Mrs. Green" he greeted the nurse, allowing her to enter.
"Good day, Nicholas" she replied with a polite smile when she noticed the patient was awake and staring back at her "Commander".
"Good morning, Mrs. Green" the blond man was sitting up in bed.
He surely picked up the name from the boy, she doubted he could remember such information from the one moment she'd seen him semiconscious, when he'd arrived; the pain he was experiencing when Dr. Nowak and herself introduced to him in order to distract, should have been overwhelming.
"I'm happy to see you're doing better, sir" she commented as she placed her bag on the table nearby and turned to his assistant "Thank you Nicholas. You've done a good job".
"Always ready to serve, Mrs. Green" he looked at her with pride, then to his boss, who nodded gratefully at him.
"I'll run a quick examination on Commander Erwin's current condition so, if he has no objection, you may retire and have some breakfast in the meantime" she indicated while putting gloves on and the stethoscope around her neck.
Griselda followed his gaze and saw the officer nod affirmatively towards him before the young man walked out of the room.
Looking at him closer, she noted he was still a bit pale but that should improve within the hours. She stood beside the nightstand and took his medical file, satisfied to see the boy sacredly recorded his vitals every two hours, just as she asked.
"It's good to know you're one tough cookie, Commander" she observed while she unbuttoned his shirt, but then she glared reproachfully at him "Although I'd prefer for you to lay down and sleep more. It's the only way you'll recover sooner".
"My apologies but I cannot follow that instruction for as long as I'd like, Mrs. Green" the Commander at least offered an honest apologetic smile "There's so much in my head right now that I'm actually having a little trouble to fall asleep. Aside from that, I feel good in general" he stated, looking to where his right arm should be.
"I understand your position, sir but I'll have to bring some sedatives when I come back this evening with your doses of antibiotics" she informed, quite serious about it "The only way your body will be able to accelerate cellular regeneration is through rest. We both know this place is so prone to another attack or any sort of hazard, that you need to get well properly. I don't think myself mistaken to believe you're the kind of man who'd neglect himself to run into battle, convalescing and all".
The blond half snorted half chuckled and looked out to the window for a couple seconds, thoughtful.
"You have a good argument there, so it's impossible for me to refute your point" he granted, with a somewhat melancholic smile "However, the only promise I can make is that I'll try to be a better patient".
"Not perfect but better I guess" the woman didn't like that, but she wasn't blind to the general picture and how things were for them. And now that she'd met him, she liked his steady and sincere gaze; it was no lie when he said he'd try behaving "The bandages are a little stained, but I think it's better to wait a few more hours before changing them" she said as she looked his stump from different angles and then at his face "Did you have breakfast today?".
"Just a glass of milk" he responded, looking back at her "I wasn't that hungry".
"Sometimes, the loss of appetite it's an anesthesia side effect but I strongly recommend you eat at least a little more today. I know it's repetitive and annoying, but it's the second most important part of recovery after sleeping, Commander".
She saw him nod quietly and right then, it looked like he wanted to say something, but the man hesitated and clearly restrained from doing so. She raised an eyebrow at him, letting the officer know she'd seen his intention.
"I meant to ask you something, but I truly don't wish to sound inconsiderate or ungrateful to you, Mrs. Green" he confessed, his countenance unswerving "I remember way too well all what you and Doctor Nowak did when I got here".
"You don't need to feel compromised, Commander" she clarified but she was quite impressed to know that; he shouldn't have been able to recall those events "It's my duty, after all. And I'm glad you value it, just as we value yours".
Griselda didn't feel the same devotion Elia had towards them, but she wasn't blind to the fact that these people were constantly making huge sacrifices for which they received nothing in return. They fought aiming to live in a world free of titans, to live with no fear, and she could thank them for that. After all, it was her own son's dream.
"I wanted to ask about someone from the medical staff" he began, showing a measured interest "It's the person that was sent here after we returned from our previous expedition. Last name Stoltz, if I remember correctly".
"Indeed, I know her" Griselda admitted, hiding her surprise "What do you wish to know?"
"I was wondering if it'd be possible for that person to be in charge of my recovery from now on" his voice was firm and his eyes showed nothing but determination "But as I said before, I don't intend to offend you. It's just that ..." he kept talking but she decided to interrupt.
"There's no need to explain, sir" she slowly shook her head "And you shouldn't worry to offend me because you don't" she stated.
Griselda suspected that her protégé had made a good and strong impression on him. And it was true she couldn't say whether the man was good or bad, but she knew Elia would know; the girl was not easy to mislead, and she'd be happy to help these people more directly. Besides, from what she'd heard in all the years she'd known Erwin Smith's name, she could tell he was honorable enough to grant him the opportunity to approach to the healer, who was alone in the world.
"That's good to know" the blond looked at her respectfully. Soon after that, he once again averted his eyes to what was outside that window, contemplative, he added "Would you mind telling me a little about her? I know that goes beyond your duty, but I have my reasons" he muttered, and looked at her with those strong and reliable big blue eyes "Of course, if you can't or don't want to, I'll understand".
"I have no problem, sir. But I'll only share a general view from my perspective, mostly as her superior and supervisor" she clarified.
For what Griselda was saying now, anyone could have deduced she took pride in working with someone like Elia. Even though they had not known each other for years, she told him the girl was one of those people who never pretended to be what she wasn't to fit in, because she didn't care to be accepted as long as she was being true to herself and her principles.
On a professional opinion, the healer was extremely responsible and committed, punctual, and she was highly capable in the medical field. Elia was gentle but also strong, determined, perceptive and not easily intimidated. She even shared a short story about that one time when she saw her aiding a homeless rather than a well-known merchant who demanded to be treated first; Griselda said she liked the way the girl simply told him she'd help him, but he'd have to wait because the other man's condition needed immediate assistance. Which was common sense, but she said he'd be surprised to see very few had those ethics.
"And she's a dear friend" the senior nurse concluded, with an intricate warning although she doubted he had ulterior motives.
Of course, there was a lot she didn't say out of respect for Elia, especially nothing related to her personal life. The girl was the only one who could share that.
"Thank you" was all he said, and she could have sworn she'd seen certain enthusiastic gleam in his eyes.
She was going to say something, but she got interrupted by the three knocks on the door at that very instant. Whoever that was, didn't wait for a response because the sound of the knob told this person was coming in. Both, Griselda, and the Commander automatically turned their eyes towards the place but she suspected the blond knew who it was.
"So, you've finally got rid of annoying sergeant Commander-Erwin-is-not-allowed-to-visitors-yet" said a monotone male voice.
She glimpsed it was a short, black-haired man, but his face was hidden behind the newspaper he was reading as he walked in. Despite he wasn't making a squeaky voice she knew he was mocking Nicholas, which she didn't like one bit.
"I'm sneaking in here while balky is downstairs, having breakfast" he explained and closed the door with a swift movement of his foot, without looking "I got you the paper, though your eyes might bleed out a little once you read the amount of shit those idiots have published today …" only then he lowered the object between his hands and stopped as soon as he realized of her presence in there. He frowned slightly "I didn't imagine you were busy. I'll come back later".
That reserved countenance along with those unfriendly eyes and uncomfortable presence could make anyone uneasy. He didn't even address to her nor apologized for his rude behavior but since Commander Erwin said no word about it, it wasn't her place to scold him, so she knew it time to go.
"That's not necessary, sir. I was on my way out" she said dryly, as she moved to get her things and noted the individual near the door silently moved to the window, probably just wanting for her to bugger off quickly. You have no manners, but I do, she thought while she nodded in his direction and then looked back at her patient "Commander" she repeated the gesture and headed outside.
"Mrs. Green, wait" she heard the blond man's voice just when she'd opened the door "Thanks for everything" she could tell he meant it "About what we discussed ...".
"Don't worry, sir" she assured, turning to face him and noticed the other man was now leaning his back on the wall next to the window and looking outside, ignoring them "I'll see what I can do, but I guarantee nothing" she pointed out and his gaze showed both, respect, and gratitude before she finally turned and left.
Of course, she wasn't going to tell him she'd do all what she could to make it possible in front of that rude and disagreeable man. Firstly, to help him because she liked the man and his interest in Elia seemed honorable. And secondly, because she really hoped not having to interact with this person often. Which would surely happen, given the Commander hadn't sent him away nor looked at him disapprovingly. He was either powerful or his friend; the only options to explain his attitude. Oh, but she won't back down in your presence, she said to herself, considering Elia's character. It was a thought that made her smile.
"Are you going to explain what's happening, Gris?" she was really confused after being called to Dr. Nowak's office, who was waiting alongside her own mentor. Who by the way, had just confirmed she'd tended Commander Erwin's case in the past two days "Why can't you continue to work with him?" she was certain she'd seen Griselda grinned when the doctor agreed to it.
"First, because this place needs some really good discipline with the current new staff" the older woman was nodding with her arms crossed, being serious. And Elia agreed "Secondly, you're much younger than me and it won't be hard for you to come and go until our work there is done" ok, that actually also made some sense "And thirdly, because you're their fan" Elia narrowed her eyes at the joke while the senior nurse smirked a little "Just a joke, dear. What I meant is that I know you respect them, and that's why I thought you'd like to help the Commander with his recovery".
"I see" she muttered, looking at her hands for a second "I really appreciate it, Gris. And you're right about the last; I feel closer to Ilva whenever I'm able to help them directly" she said and smiled sincerily.
That's what had happened some hours ago when she was given this new instruction. The day had been very challenging, and it was the reason why she didn't stop to consider what this meant in regard to other issues. But now that she was on her way there, it was obviously inevitable. Not that it was bad, but after their last interaction around a week ago, she had no idea what they would do, because the idea to continue treating him like a stranger was just horrible. Nonetheless, what other options did she have...
Resigned, Elia sighed, pondering that, leaving that aside, seeing him wasn't an unpleasant prospect, not for her at least. Although, she feared her own emotions a little, foreseeing that any encounter with him might increase the longing for his company.
Am I losing my mind? she said to herself, confused. Completely ignorant to the fact that it was something else what she'd lost.
I'm sure most of you have seen the "SNK The final season Pt2" trailer by now but I still can't get over it. I just want to watch it all and at the same time, I'm scared. Tons of kleenex it's all I'll ask for Christmas this year.
About the story... I wish I could write faster.
Namárië
