James' POV

Sirius was unusually happy. It sort-of freaked me out, I'd been used to gloomy Sirius for so long.

"Whoa, baby on the loose!" I said, as little Harry went zooming past us on the broomstick Sirius had gotten him for his first birthday. Thankfully, the broomstick only went up to our knees, but it was still a bit too speedy for my taste. I swear I got more fit chasing Harry around on that thing than I ever was back at Hogwarts.

Sirius and Lily laughed at me as I tried desperately to keep up with Harry.

Finally, I came over to them, clutching at the stitch in my side.

"You try running around stooped over like that!" I snapped. "It's hard!"

Sirius chuckled. "Maybe you're just getting old, Prongs."

I shot him a grin. "Never, Pads."

He smiled and getting up, went chasing after Harry himself.

I took the seat on the sofa he left unoccupied and spoke to Lily.

"He seems happier."

"Yeah, a lot," Lily agreed.

"What do you think happened?" I asked.

"I don't know," Lily mused. "I was wondering that myself."

"Do you think…?" I hesitated. Then I went for it anyways. "Do you think it might be because Ray's back?"

Lily's eyes tightened. I could see how much it pained her to consider that Ray was back, and hadn't contacted us.

"Lils, I'm sorry-" I began.

"No, no, it's okay," Lily said, even though tears were welling up in her eyes. "I can't say I wasn't thinking about that, too."

I put my arm around her and kissed her cheek. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything."

Lily shook her head. "No, really. If she's alive and well, that's all I could hope for." She wiped her eyes with her sleeve and took a deep breath. "I just really miss her, James," she said, and I could see her choking up again.

"I know, love," I said, and pressed my lips to her cheek again.

"Trust me," I whispered. "I feel the same."

Sirius returned to the living room, bouncing Harry in his arms.

"Here's the little troublemaker!" he said, smiling at Harry. Harry beamed back at him, happy to have been caught by large-statured Sirius rather than his twiggy father. It made Harry feel bigger too.

Lily immediately got up and clearing her throat said, "I'll make some tea, shall I?" and left to the kitchen.

Sirius watched her leave as he sat down with Harry.

"What's up, Prongs? She okay?"

"Yeah," I said. "Guess she, uh, really wanted some tea."

Sirius scoffed in disbelief. "You're still fucking terrible at lying," he said.

"And you're still going to let me get away with it," I said and gave him a cheeky smile.

Then, Harry tugged on Sirius' collar.

"What's up, little buddy?" Sirius said, lifting him slightly.

"You gave him the necklace," Sirius noticed. "Looks huge on him. I mean, the necklace is pretty much wearing him."

"Well, Lily gave it to him," I clarified. "Hope that's all right."

"Of course, mate," Sirius replied.

"How's Worm doing?" I asked Sirius. "Is he holding up all right?"

"Yeah," Sirius said. "I checked in on him last week and I'm planning to visit him again tomorrow."

"Thanks," I said to Sirius. "You're putting yourself in danger for us, Padfoot-"

"Shut up, I don't want to hear it anymore," Sirius said, shaking his head. "Don't you remember how many times you and your family kept me safe? It's the least I can do to repay you once."

I smiled, though my lips felt a little tight. I couldn't help thinking of my parents and how much I missed them.

Lily walked in then, carrying the tea and some scones.

Sirius noticed the scones immediately.

Lily caught his gaze. She rolled her eyes and sighed, "Yes, they're for you, Sirius."

"Yes!" he said victoriously, happily reaching over for them.

She paused and then, cocking her head to the side, she said to Sirius, "You smell different. Did you finally take a shower?"

"Very funny," Sirius scoffed. "I'll have you know that I'm a very clean dog."

"Clean for a dog does not necessarily translate to clean for a human," Lily teased him.

He shot her a glare.

"Did you stop smoking, Pads?" I asked him.

He nodded. "I haven't smoked since- Well, for a while now."

"Good," Lily said approvingly. "I hated thinking that Harry's godfather was a smoker."

"Don't worry," Sirius said, "I'll make sure I give Harry his first cigarette."

"You will do nothing of the sort," Lily said, her eyes steely. "Or there'll be no more scones for you, mister."

I laughed. Lily always managed to say the right things and to have the moral high ground, but whenever she argued with Sirius, he succeeded in dragging her down to his level of immaturity, and she ended up sounding like she was scolding a kindergartner.


Lily's POV

It was Halloween and we could hear kids and parents mingling on the streets outside as evening settled in.

James sighed and leaned back against the couch. He had been playing with Harry on the floor. "Damn it," he said. "It's the one night we can look like ourselves in the Muggle world and not be taken for freaks."

I laughed lightly. "You wouldn't have even known that a couple years ago. Remember when you went to the grocery store in full gear? Everyone thought you were mad."

James grinned. "There are a lot of things I wouldn't have learned if it wasn't for you."

"But turns out the Muggle world is interesting, in its own way," James ruminated. "I never would have thought that when I was younger. I never cared, to be honest."

"I know," I said, sitting down beside him.

"So I'm glad," James said, watching Harry struggle to his feet, only to fall down again on his bottom.

James smiled and then looked at me. "I'm glad to have met you, Lily Potter."

I smiled back and pressing my hand against his cheek, I kissed him.

Then, I settled back besides James and held out my arms for Harry.

Seeing me, Harry tried to get back on his feet and run, but fell immediately.

James chucked.

"Oh dear," I giggled, and leaned over to pick him up and cradle him in my arms. He was getting almost too big now, but for the time being, everything was all right.

"I do hope Peter's all right," I mused. "You don't think we've put too much of a strain on him?"

James shook my head and said proudly, "Wormtail's going to be fine. I know he can seem cowardly, but he's still a Marauder, y'know?"

Harry grabbed a fistful of my hair. Ow, ow, ow.

"Hey, hey, hey, you don't do that to Mummy's hair," James said, tapping Harry lightly on the nose.

Harry looked at James guiltily and swallowed at his dad's stern face.

That did it. James broke into laughter and kissed Harry's nose.

"Fine, fine, you can do anything you want, Harry," James sighed and gave in. "Shake Mummy bald if you want. I don't care. Long as you're happy, Harry."

I shook my head. He was nothing but the softest teddy bear of a dad you could ever find.

"He has you wrapped around his little finger, James," I laughed.

"Only the second person in the whole world to do that," James remarked.

Harry crawled over into his dad's lap. James scooped him up in my arms and then lied down, laying his head in my lap.

I smiled down at him and at Harry.

"It's a shame you didn't get your mum's hair, you know," he said to Harry. "I always had a thing for gingers, Harry."

Harry burped.

"Good job, Harry," James cheered.

"Don't lie," I retorted. "You're so proud of the fact that he looks totally like you. You're always going on about it."

"Uh, yeah, 'cause it means he's going to be getting all the girls, this one," James replied, as though that were obvious.

I smacked him hard on the forehead.

"Ouch, Lily!"

I rolled my eyes. "Our son is not going to grow up to be a ladies' man."

"Please. Whose son do you think he is? He's going to be a total ladies' man, well that is- until he finds the right girl."

"But he's got your eyes," James said, studying Harry. "Your beautiful eyes."

Harry struggled to get away and James let him go. Harry waddled off. We both laughed as we watched him.

Then, James turned his eyes on me. He propped himself up on his elbows and I leaned down slightly to kiss him. He reached up to caress my cheek and touch my long hair.

"I know it's hard, Lils," he whispered. "But I wouldn't have it any other way. You're worth it and Harry's worth it."

He smiled slightly. "You know what I mean? I have a family again."

My heart couldn't contain all the love I felt for this wonderful (and still slightly immature) man so all I could do was kiss him again and hope that he understood the words that I could not say.

It was loud that night because of Halloween, so I let Harry stay up later than usual.

James was entertaining Harry by sending up small glittering puffs of colored smoke from his wand. Fascinated, Harry was trying to grab them and gurgling with laughter.

I was watching from the doorway, but finally stepped in and yawning said, "It's bedtime for Harry, James. It's almost eleven."

James nodded and let me take Harry to bed.


I can't really tell you what happened after that- at least, not accurately. There aren't words.

James ran up the stairs, shouting my name. His voice was hoarse and desperate.

"James? James!" I appeared at the top of the stairs.

James looked up at me. For a moment, his face looked like the face of a man who had lost everything. My heart stopped. I knew. He nodded, knowing that I knew. Peter had betrayed us, and Voldemort was here, now. For a moment, shock reeled through me. Peter is the traitor?

Then, James steeled himself and I could see in his eyes that deep down, he had been waiting for this moment.

"James-" I started, but he ran down the stairs. He shouted, "Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off-"

Knowing I was turning my back on James' life, I still turned away. Tears streaked down my face and my heart was pounding- I had left James to do, but don't you see? I had to. I had to save the one treasure we both loved even more than each other.

I dashed into Harry's room, locked the door, and ran to Harry, who was still trying to stand in his cot.

"Harry, Momma loves you," I whispered. Harry stared at me with those wondering eyes. "Momma loves you. You are so loved."

I heard a loud crash in the first-floor hallway.

That must have been James.

My heart ripped.

I started sobbing.

James, James, no…

But Harry's eyes, knowing nothing of the world and only looking to me for protection- I had to be strong. It was not a choice.

I love you so much, Harry. I love you, and your father loved you.

The door burst open and high-pitched laughter, cold as frozen steel, rang out.

"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!" I begged.

"Stand aside, you silly girl. Stand inside now." The Dark Lord commanded. He was terrifying. It was terrifying just being in his presence. He seemed to have no face under that dark hood. Only his snakelike eyes glimmered… I'm afraid. No, but I'm a mother. I'm the only one Harry has left.

"Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead!" I pleaded with all my heart and soul and being. Please just don't take Harry. "Not Harry! Please… Have mercy…. Have mercy…."

I sobbed as I guarded Harry in the cot, my arms splayed out desperately. Let me protect my baby! Please!

The Dark Lord slowly began to laugh again and then he drew out his wand and pointed it at my chest faster than in a blink of an eye.

I screamed. "Not Ha-!"

A green light burst from his wand and hit me directly in my chest.

A million voices rang out in my head, but they were all saying the same thing: Spare Harry! Please! Not my baby, please! Not Harry!

And then I fell into that other realm, the realm where all our loved ones go before us.


Sirius' POV

I rode my motorcycle to Peter's house late that night. I suppose I could have Apparated, but riding the motorcycle was one of the few hobbies I had left that I could still indulge in.

I knocked on his front door.

"Hey, Worm, it's me."

There was no response. Was he sleeping?

"Worm, open up!"

I banged on the door, loud enough to wake him up.

There was still no reply.

I started to feel uneasy.

"Pete?" I called.

Nothing.

I magicked the door to unlock and pushed it open. I stepped in. "Pete, you there?"

I stopped short. There was no one in here. What's more, nothing was disturbed in the house. There was no sign of a struggle or anything.

A really awful feeling crept into my body. That sneaking suspicion…

No, they would have come after me. We set it up to make sure that they'd come after me. Pete must just be on duty or something.

I took off, jumping onto my motorcycle. It lifted into the air and turned invisible as I flew into the sky and went full throttle to Godric's Hollow.


I saw the house before I landed. It was utterly destroyed.

James! Lily! Harry!

I raced into the damaged remnants of the house as fast as I could.

"JAMES!" I shouted. "JAMES!"

Nobody responded.

"LILY!?" I called frantically.

Silence.

I headed for the stairs, and then-

"No…"

I fell to my knees.

"No."

No.

This can't be- James.

His body was still and his eyes had no light in them. His trademark warmth and mischievousness were gone.

I bowed my head and wept.

But what if Lily and Harry were still alive?

Don't hope. You can't hope. You can't.

I know, but you still have to look for them.

I'm scared.

I know, but it's what James would have done for you.

I managed to get up and stepping over my best friend's dead body, I staggered up the stairs.

There, I found Hagrid.

For a moment, I thought Lily and Harry were all right.

Dumbledore must have known, and sent Hagrid before it was too late.

Then, I saw Lily's fallen body on the floor.

I shook my head numbly as the tears streaked down my face.

Prongs, I failed you. I failed you completely.

"Sirius."

Hagrid approached me.

"I'm sorry," Hagrid said gruffly. "But look 'ere."

I blearily opened my eyes.

All this fighting… For what? For what, if we can't even save a single life?

"Harry lived," Hagrid told me and showed me the bundle in his arms.

The smallest breath of life entered me when I saw Harry, cradled in Hagrid's arms.

"He's… alive?" I said, my voice breaking. "Harry's alive?"

"Yea," Hagrid replied, and tried to smile at me. "So not all's lost yet."

But his words reminded me of what was lost and I wept again. My shoulders shook as I pressed my fingers against my eyes, trying to force back in the tears I came down mercilessly anyways.

Stay strong. Remember, do what James would have done for you.

I took a shuddering breath and trying hard to compose myself, I looked up at Hagrid through my tears and said, "Hagrid, James and Lily made me Harry's godfather. So I should take him from here."

But Hagrid shook his head. "I'm to take him straight to Dumbledore. Dumbledore's orders."

"But… I'm his godfather," I protested. "Prongs- I mean, James entrusted Harry to me. I'll take good care of him, I swear."

Hagrid looked at me sympathetically, but held his ground. "I have to get him to Dumbledore. You understand, don't you? He's the boy who lived. He's got to get to Dumbledore."

I frowned, but nodded slowly. I can't say I have the confidence to protect Harry as well as Dumbledore can. In this case, Harry should go to Dumbledore. For now. I'll come take him later, and give him the best life he could possibly have. But right now he's still in danger from Voldemort and from his remaining followers.

Anger erupted in me, white-hot and scalding. It came along with the guilt that was killing me. I had suggested they change Secret Keepers to Peter. I had never imagined that they would go after Peter.

Then, a thought clicked in my mind.

They wouldn't go after Peter.

They didn't go after Peter. The house was undisturbed.

Then, did Peter go to them?

I breathed in, sharp and quick, when the most obvious thought fell into place.

It's been Peter all along. This whole time… Peter was the spy.

He volunteered to lead the Death Eaters on a chase in the siren caves because he knew they wouldn't hurt him. He scouted the location just before that bomb blew off Mad-Eye's leg. He also scouted the neighborhood where Raylynx and I were ambushed and had told James that the Death Eaters didn't know we were coming. And when Fabien and Gideon died, it was Peter who told me it was "Mudblood's" house. Merlin, it's so obvious now. He even said "Mudblood"! I didn't realize it because I'm so desensitized to that word, but if I think about the fact that he used that word to describe Raylynx and if I consider the timing of all of the misinformation. It was him, all along.

My hands gripped into fists so tight that my nails dug into my palms. I was breathing heavily, as though I'd just run a long ways. But the feeling was true, because suddenly, I was a long, long ways from the man I had been just a few seconds ago.

"Sirius?"

How could I have not seen? How…? All along…

"I'm sorry," Hagrid said regretfully and clapped a large hand on my shoulders in an attempt to comfort me.

"Take my motorcycle, Hagrid. I don't need it anymore." I said, almost growling. That's right. I have another chase to go on, a rat to go after- and destroy.

"Thanks," Hagrid said. "Yeh take care, Sirius." With a nod, he left.

Trembling, I walked over slowly and knelt beside Lily's body. Hagrid had already gently closed her eyes.

Thank you, Lily, for everything and especially for bringing so much light into James' life. I kissed her hand and then walked back down to where James' body lay.

I sat down besides his body and cried. I cried like I'd never cried, not even when my mother had cursed me for the first time as child.

Clumsily, I reached for James' hand.

"Sorry, Prongs. Sorry. I'm so sorry."

I sniffed and wiped my tears. I gently closed James' eyes and kissing his hand, I rested it on his chest.

Then, I got up, gathered myself, and left the house.

I was on the hunt, a hunt for a rat.