Raylynx's POV

Suddenly, the building shook and a part of the ceiling caved in. From the ruins within, I could distantly hear a victorious, deranged laugh ring out. I knew who that was.

She's probably cut off her pursuers, I realized. At this point, she'll escape.

Before I had consciously decided anything, I was already sprinting towards the opera house.

I heard Jasper yell my name, but I didn't turn back.

I knew this was the only chance we'd get with Bellatrix. She always had more than one trick up her sleeve. But letting Bellatrix get away was not an outcome I could accept. Not this time.

I sprinted through the front entrance and into the main chamber. The main chamber was full of marble columns, lined up in a perfect circle. On the other end of the chamber, flitting between two columns, was Bellatrix.

When she saw me, she grinned and wasted no time in firing a Cruciatus Curse at me.

I deflected it, but then I saw Bellatrix running towards a side exit. She's not getting away!

I growled and gritting my teeth, ran to meet her.

"BELLATRIX!" I snarled, furious.

Her hideous laughter rang through the chamber as I chased her in a parallel curve, both of darting in and out of the columns and throwing spells at each other.

She was getting close to the exit. Think, Raylynx! Think! I pointed my wand and yelled, "Ventilabus supra!"

Bellatrix shouted and set up a shield, thinking that I was aiming for her. But I wasn't. My spell caught the column next to her, which fell into the next column, and all down the line.

Bellatrix cursed and tried to outrun the falling pillars, but was too slow. All the columns fell like dominos. I yelled and dove between two falling columns and managed to make it inside. We were both trapped into this makeshift marble arena.

Bellatrix screamed in frustration. She whirled around and spat at me. "You insolent little brat! You think you can stop me? Let me show you!"

Flame erupted the end of her wand. As it burst forward, it left the ground behind it utterly scorched. The golden and crimson flames had a black underbelly to them and the fire danced ravenously, leaping forth like serpents.

This is Fiendfyre.

Bellatrix began to cackle. "Nobody has been able to master fire like me. The Dark Lord trained me especially."

She sneered at me. "You have no chance, Mudblood."

The flames roared and in no time at all, lapped hungrily at my feet.

Bellatrix grinned in anticipation.

I swallowed and stepped back. The heat of the fire seared across my face.

If only I had the King's wand, I thought desperately. But that was a useless thought.

I gripped my wand tightly and willed it to adhere to me.

I thought hard to myself. What would the old Raylynx do? Bu that was also the wrong question. What I had to ask myself was: What about me has remained the same? What part of me does the wand still respond to?

I closed my eyes and tried to think of the first time I'd held this wand.

"Haven't you got a misfit wand or something? One that no one else wanted?"

"Here."

Unmistakable warmth flooded through me and suddenly the entire store was bathed in a warm glow the color of an orange-pink sunset. No light had been produced from my wand and yet, unmistakably, that light had been produced from my wand… from me.

"Pine mixed with pink ivory, phoenix feather, twelve and a half inches. Poignant and illuminating. Subtle yet rich. It has stayed in this store for over fifty years. I believed I had miscreated it, but it seems that it was waiting for you."

As I thought of the memory, I felt something stir within my wand. It could hear me calling its name, a name I had long forgotten, and it was trying to respond.

As Bellatrix's hysterical laugh ripped through the roaring of the fire, I spoke to the wand in my mind. You have been with me all these years. But I still don't know- Why did you choose me back then? I was so happy when you did. I felt like, for the first time, I was really believed in. But what did you see in me back then, even before I knew any magic? I want to live up to the person you believed in.

The wand trembled in my hand as the Fiendfyre circled around me, leaping up and preparing to devour me.

Please, I thought hard as I gripped my wand tightly. Help me become that person, a wielder worthy of you.

Suddenly, silver fire spurted from the end of my wand and created a thin shield encasing me in. A power I'd never felt before emanated from my wand, protecting me. It was Light magic, but it shivered with a deep-rooted power, as old as the universe. Bellatrix's serpents of flame struck, but were deflected by my silver fire. I kept my mind focused, resisting the urge to fall apart every time the Fiendfyre struck my flame shield. Eventually, the serpents shrieked and moved back.

"What!?" Bellatrix hissed in anger and surprise.

My silver fire slowed its whirling around me. For a moment, it crystallized into a silver rock around me before shattering into dust.

Bellatrix stared at me in shock.

My wand hummed in my hand. I heard its song.

The answer to fire is not water.

The answer to fire is your own fire, your flame unleashed and unafraid.

"You think I'm scared of fire?" I said quietly, but my gaze was fierce. "My parents died in it. They will protect me."

She glared at me and I stared at her calmly.

Then, we both snapped-

"Confringo!"

"Secturus!"

The spells narrowly missed each other.

My spell caught Bellatrix in the chest and she was thrown backwards into the pillar, which, already mostly destroyed by the Fiendfyre, crumbled as black ash all over us as she fell to the ground and slumped over, unconscious.

Bellatrix's spell hit my wrist before ripping into my shoulder. I grimaced as I felt a deep cut in my skin and blood spurted onto my face.

But it didn't matter. I had won.

I walked over to her fallen figure. I knelt down and grabbed her filthy hair and jerked her head back. I murmured and ropes erupted from the end of my wand and slithered around her whole body and over her mouth. I shoved her head back roughly into the columns. There was a sound of sharp impact and then blood slowly trickled down the side of her face. I stared at her in disgust and hatred.

The others will catch up soon. This is your only chance.

My fingers twitched around my wand.

Kill her. For Alice and Frank.

Cold and calculating, I raised my wand and pointed it at her hand.

Say it. Say the words. You can do it.

But then, Alice showed up so clearly in my mind.

I heard her whisper to me: I would never want this from you, Ray. This won't bring me back.

No, it won't. I thought.

It's not going to bring her back. Nothing can bring Alice and Frank back.

All the more reason to kill Bellatrix. Kill her now! Do it!

My wand protested in my hand. The connection I had felt with it shattered.

"Ms. Kingsley? Raylynx, are you there!?"

I heard a voice sound out from the other side of the barricade of broken pillars.

Trembling, I lowered my wand.

Finally, I called out, "I'm here. I'm all right."

Suddenly, a few of the pillars were lifted off the ground and moved away. Moody, Ahmed, and Jasper appeared. They both caught sight of Bellatrix and of the burnt floor. Jasper took in a deep breath.

"What the hell happened here, Kingsley?" Moody barked at me.

I shrugged. "I couldn't keep up with her running, so I collapsed some pillars."

"You collapsed them all?" Jasper said wonderingly.

"That had nothing to do with magic," I told him. "They were arranged in a perfect circle with interfering heights. It's just a matter of simple physics, isn't it?"

"What's… fizz-sics?" Jasper said blankly

"Don't worry about it," I reassured him.

Moody strode over to Bellatrix.

"Hmmph," he said. "Well done, Kingsley."

"What about Rodolphus and Rabastan?" I asked.

Moody nodded. "Successfully caught."

"How's Shacklebolt? Is he all right?" I asked Ahmed.

Ahmed nodded. "Yeah, Maude's looking after him now."

"And the others?"

"They're all sporting a few scrapes and bruises, but nothing the Maude won't be able to fix. Maude's a hell of a defensive spell-caster and she was a Healer before she was a Hit Wizard."

Suddenly, Moody grinned rather viciously. "We caught them all. All three of them."

"Let's head back. The Ministry will want to report this as soon as they possibly can," Ahmed said.

Moody, Ahmed, and Dmitri each held onto the ropes wrapping the Death Eaters. The rest of us surrounded them, guarding just in case.


We entered the Ministry to great applause. We had to give a brief report of what happened, but were quickly excused for some much needed treatment.

The nearer I got to St. Mungo's, the closer I felt to having a full-on anxiety attack.

I didn't kill her. I didn't kill Bellatrix. Even though she did that to Alice, and not just Alice, but to Frank and Augusta and Neville, I didn't have the strength in me to-

"Miss." Jasper's voice was both shocked and pitying. I realized I'd been gripping my hands into fists, and the wound on my wrist was slowly dripping blood.

We all received treatment together. Chris came and sat beside me. He had a nasty bruise on his neck and a cut on his jaw, which, the Healer pointed out, would have killed him if it'd hit his neck.

Neither of us said anything, just sat together. But we had barely been bandaged up when a Law Enforcement officer rushed in to retrieve us.

"All three of them have woken up and the Wizengamot want to do the trial now. They need our testimony."

The trial surrounding the Lestranges was profoundly uneventful. The Lestranges had no qualms about screaming their continued loyalty to the Dark Lord and were promptly sentenced to life in Azkaban.

The difficulty was about the fourth defendant: Crouch's son, Barty Crouch Jr. I remembered him from Hogwarts. He was vile and disgusting and cruel and he was certainly a Death Eater and yet- it wasn't at all clear whether he had cursed Alice and Frank or simply been an accomplice. With the roaring crowd and all the pressure on Barty Crouch Sr. to perform, his son was also sentenced to life imprisonment in Azkaban. He deserved it, but I couldn't help but realize how the courts were just another stage. Crouch Sr. wanted nothing more than to disown his son and gain back the little dignity he had left after his own son was exposed as a Death Eater. His wife fainted when he viciously sentenced his son to life imprisonment. The whole thing made me nauseous.

The trial finished with Bellatrix shrieking, "The Dark Lord will rise again, Crouch! Throw us into Azkaban, we will wait! He will rise again and will come for us, and he will reward us beyond any of his other supporters! We alone were faithful! We alone tried to find him!"

I rose from the witness stand and left with those screams still lingering in my mind.


Sirius' POV

I lay on the floor, breathing very slowly.

I was in my Animagus form, which is the form I took when it all got too much.

Well, it was always too much.

Everything inside me was hollow.

Who knew a soul could be emptied out this way?

The overwhelming despair and guilt I felt ate at me day by day, until there was nothing of substance really left.

I felt as though I was reaching my end.

I was going to die.

But the dementors wouldn't let me. They would lay off just enough to let me regenerate my soul, to make feel the slightest bit human again, until they fed off of me for the thousandth time.

I shivered.

This is hell. This is hell. This is hell.

Suddenly, shrieks and the sounds of a scuffle penetrated the prison.

I knew what that meant. New prisoners were coming in.

I also knew that after a few weeks, the shrieks would die down as my fellow inmates slowly lost their minds.

"WE ARE FAITHFUL TO THE DARK LORD! WE ARE HIS LOYAL SERVANTS!"

That hauntingly and ghastly familiar voice screeched against my ear drums.

I changed back into my human form and pulled myself upon just as the guards turned the corner.

Bellatrix's hysterical screaming paused as she recognized me. Her expression changed into one of savage glee.

"Well, well, well," she sneered at me. "Look what we have here. Hello cousin."

Then, she was dragged off, followed by the two Lestrange brothers and then yet another boy. I recognized him, though it took me a good long second to put a name to his face: Barty Crouch Junior.

That day, Bellatrix's screams echoed through the prison. When she finally went quiet, I could hear her muttering curses under her breath. "Pettigrew, you double-crosser, just wait until I get my hands on your neck…"

I wasn't sure whether the fact that she was one of the few people who knew that I was totally innocent made me feel slightly better or pissed me off that much more. After a while, I realized that it just made me feel that much more depressed and furious. The only people who knew were the people who derived pleasure from the pain and suffering I was undergoing now.

I tried to clear my mind, tried to stop from letting the emotions from getting the best of me.

I failed. That was a long night in a series of long nights. It was never-ending torture. I was surely and quickly losing my mind. I tried to breathe in, but it felt like there was a brick constricting my chest. I curled up on the floor and trembled my way to a half-broken sleep.


Raylynx's POV

I was sitting at the table numbly, staring at the tea I'd started making. But in reality, I saw Bellatrix's unconscious body in front of my eyes, and my wand out in front of me, pointing straight at her heart.

Kill her.

My fingers twitched around my cup.

I didn't kill her.

I didn't kill her.

Is it because I'm weak?

Was I afraid of taking a life?

Why didn't I kill her?

I had hoped that doing homely things would calm me down, but I couldn't let it go.

I had lowered my wand. Why?

If those bastards could raise their wands and do what they had done to Alice and Frank, then why couldn't I…?

Alice and Frank in their shell-shocked, mentally insane conditions rose in my mind. They were going to be that way until they died.

How? How is this possible? Voldemort is gone. Why the fuck are these tragedies still happening? When will they finally stop? I've lost my parents, Marlene, Dorcas, Lily, James, and Peter. I may as well have lost Sirius, too. And now Alice and Frank are… It's worse than if they were… It would have been better if they'd just… Rather they just…

I suddenly leapt up and cleared the whole table in one furious sweep of my arms. The tea and the cup went flying. The cup and tea kettle smashed into the wall and shattered. I upended the table, kicked it so it went skidding across the small table, and then grabbed a vase on the counter and threw it against the wall. It smashed with a horrific sound.

Then, I just stood there in all that mess, tea and water pooling everywhere.

At least now my surroundings reflected a little of what I felt like inside.

At least now I knew my reality was fucked-up and it wasn't just me going totally crazy in my head.

Just then, the doorbell rang.

I hurriedly waved my wand, forcibly magicking the table, vase, cup, and tea kettle back to their unbroken forms. I waved my wand again and the spilled tea and water disappeared.

The doorbell rang again.

I tried to calm my breathing and smoothed back my hair. Then, I finally made it to the door.

"Raylynx."

"Remus."

We were both silent.

Then, he said, "Would I be intruding on you if I…?"

"No, not at all," I replied, and stepped aside to let him in.

"Tea?" I offered.

"Yes, I'd appreciate some."

I set to work brewing tea as though I hadn't just brewed it minutes before, as if I hadn't gone through that episode.

"I heard the radio this afternoon," Remus said.

I didn't respond and poured the tea instead. They had broadcasted the trial so as to appease the public.

"From the sounds of it, you were the one who captured Bellatrix."

"It was a group effort," I said curtly and pushed the tea towards him.

"Alice and Frank. How are they?" Remus asked softly.

"When we found them, they couldn't recognize any of us," I told bluntly.

Remus breathed in sharply. He seemed to chew over his words before he finally said comfortingly, "Well, at least you found them. They might have died if you hadn't-"

"Of course they would have died," I said scathingly. "There's no self-preservation when you have no sense of self."

"Perhaps they might regain-"

"They're not coming back, Remus. For all intents and purposes, they're gone."

Remus shut up immediately, but the anger built up in me and continued. I spat out bitterly, "It would have been a mercy if they had just died."

A wave of guilt washed over me. I abruptly stood from my seat.

Raylynx, calm yourself! Don't yell at Remus.

I leaned over the table and gripped its edges. I tried to force a deep breath, to steady myself.

Keep it together, keep it together.

I looked up at Remus to see him staring back at me. He knew that I was at my very limit.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, barely controlling myself. "But can you come back another day, Remus? Today isn't really the best… time…"

Remus stared at me. "What happened?" he finally asked, and his voice hovered, as if he wasn't sure that he wanted to know.

"Nothing," I said, but my voice was distorted.

"Raylynx," Remus said, and his voice was soft, but no longer uncertain. He wanted me to tell him.

"Remus, if you had the chance to kill Bellatrix, would you? If she were lying in front of you, totally unconscious, would you end her life?"

Remus swallowed. "I don't- I don't know." He paused and then said in a quieter voice, "To be honest, I think I would."

My heart sank. Slowly, I dredged up my confession. With the shame and guilt nearly choking me, I said, "I had that chance. And I didn't take it."

My voice broke and I hurriedly turned my head away from him.

"Ray…"

When I refused to look at him, Remus got off his chair and came over to me. He knelt in front of me and saw the tears streaking down my haunted face.

"You did the right thing," he whispered, only he whispered it like it was a promise instead of a fact.

"I didn't. You said yourself you would."

"Yes, but that just shows that you are a better person than me."

I shook my head and the tears scattered, a few of them landing on Remus' jacket collar.

"It wasn't because I was trying to be noble. It was because I didn't have the guts," I confessed, and I honestly felt like the grief inside me would swallow me up. I felt like I was slowly being squeezed from the inside out. I couldn't breathe.

Remus could see that I was about to hyperventilate.

"Breathe," he said. "Breathe, Raylynx. Calm yourself."

I nodded and tried to do as he said.

I wasn't like this before. I never had anxiety attacks like this. Why is this happening to me now?

Is it because I let my guards down? Maybe, even after all I've been through, I still take my life for granted. See, I thought that I could at least be with Alice… I thought that with the other three gone, at least she and I could… at least her…

The tears weren't slowing, but at least I could breathe properly again. At some point I had closed my eyes, but I could still feel Remus beside me, watching over me.

I let out a sigh and opened my eyes.

"I'm all right now," I said, calmly. "I promise."

I wiped my eyes and stood up. Remus stood up with me.

"I'm sorry." I managed a weak smile, though I couldn't quite look him in the eyes. "I don't know what got over me, Remus."

He just shook his head.

"Ray," he said, and his voice was serious.

I looked up at him.

"If I had been in your situation and I hadn't killed her, I think I would have reacted exactly like you did. But if I had killed her… I think I would have felt even worse, somehow. In fighting Death Eaters, we can't… we can't let ourselves become like them. That's the hardest part, somehow."

Remus' words gave me strength, but I saw his eyes darken and I knew he was remembering that time he had been sent to the werewolves.

"We're not like them," I said fiercely, wanting to remind Remus of who he was. "We've made different choices."

Remus smiled softly. "That's my point."

I paused, disarmed. He was trying to show me that I had done the noble thing, somehow. I didn't feel that way, but he saw me like I saw him: more than I gave myself credit for. I knew he was wrong, but I couldn't argue, because I felt the same way about Remus.

"Okay," I said. "You win."

We drank our tea quietly, both lost in our thoughts.

When he finally left, he said, "Come find me whenever. I'll always be waiting for you."

Then, with a small nod, he was out the door.

I got ready for bed before crawling into the covers.

I felt cold, somehow.

I curled up and stayed still, but for the longest time, I was staring into the darkness instead of sleeping.

After so many losses, it wasn't really sadness anymore. Not really… It felt more as though there was an ominous pendulum in my heart, swinging heavily between total numbness and emotional chaos. With a great effort, I closed my eyes.


a/n: thank you for the comments, and thank you for continuing to read. i also just realized you can export your chapters back to your doc manager, so sometime next month, i may start to edit and delete author's notes. on a side note, you know what's crazy is that i didn't really decide that all of these people would die or be tortured. j.k. rowling literally wrote all this. crazy how brutal it is when it's spelled out.