AN: I just want to make things clear one last time before we get going, as some of it will be controversial and infuriating:
I WILL be dismantling canon and putting a reasonable spin or alternative on it. House elves, electricity and magic, etc. I will hold no mercy. Every single character, with the exception of a very small population due to plot, will be 100% responsible for their own actions. Nobody was under a compulsion, no Obliviation, etc. Remember, all the ridiculous magic that Harry and Hermione do, that's standard stuff in a few other countries. Not everywhere functions like Magical Britain/Europe.
Just throw what's been said or told or established in the books, right into the garbage. Character behavior and actions will be met with the appropriate response.
In other news, I found an IRL woman who I feel portrays Narcissa in this story damn well perfectly. Just look up striderscribe on Twitter and give her pure blonde hair.
Narcissa, Dan, Emma, Harry and Hermione were standing near Platform 9 ¾, well out of the way and under a few secrecy spells. The five of them left a few hours earlier due to two things. One, the fact that Harry and Hermione wouldn't be able to portal them back, so they took Narcissa's car to King's Cross, and by extension, back home.
The other was the fact they wanted to catch the Weasleys in their extremely obvious trap/set up. In the other timeline, Molly was talking loud enough that Harry could clearly make out what she was saying, despite the fact there were hundreds of people going about their day, not to mention the trains making an ungodly amount of noise. Not to mention the fact that logically, Molly, and by extent Ginny definitely knew where Platform 9 ¾, considering the fact Molly has been there dozens of times, with Ginny going every year as well. Narcissa sent an anonymous letter to the DMLE, suggesting that since this was the year Harry Potter would be going to Hogwarts, that Platform 9 ¾ should have some security there.
At first, the five of them were worried that their suggestion was ignored, but were relieved when they saw at least three or four Aurors roaming around, their red robes standing out amongst the non magicals, who gave every single one of them confused looks. With that out of the way, the two teens were being fussed over by worried and caring parents.
"You have your books, notebooks and pens?" Narcissa asked, making sure Harry's outfit was as best it can be. She opted to wear an expensive looking white shirt, one that revealed a substantial amount of cleavage, along with some tight leggings that hugged her shapely legs and large round bum.
"Yes Mum." Harry said, just standing there and letting his mum fuss over him. He opted to wear a pair of black jeans, as well as a black shirt with the Punisher logo. He barely managed to style his hair, training it to the side to barely manage where his scar used to be.
"Clothes?" Emma asked. The Granger matriarch opted to wear a simple lavender sundress for the occasion.
"Very much." Hermione confirmed. She opted to wear a dark blue blouse that exposed just a sliver of tanned stomach, along with some loose blue jeans. Her bushy hair was brushed out of her face, showing off her still large front teeth.
"Games, consoles and electronics?" Narcissa asked.
"Definitely." They confirmed.
"Fake wands and protection bands?" Dan said. The only adult male was in shorts and a dark red shirt.
"Unfortunately." The duo said in unison, unhappy at the fact they had to limit themselves in order to blend in, although they were infinitely relieved when they found out that the wands would not affect them negatively, and were for all intents and purposes, just sticks. As for the bands, it was a simple bracelet that consisted of hundreds of interlocking runes that made reading their thoughts virtually impossible. Can't let Snape or Dumbledore read their thoughts.
"Thong and porn collection?" Hermione quipped lazily.
"Hermione!" Harry said, blushing at his soulmate's joke.
"What? It was funny. Besides, you don't own those things so it's not like it's a problem." She said grinning, patting the embarrassed Harry on his back.
"Hermione Granger, stop speaking like that. You're 14 and in public, show a little class." Emma admonished.
"Yes mum." She relented.
"Alright kids, this is it. Don't do anything dangerous or to draw attention to yourselves. Your counterparts did and you know what happened to them. Just, stick up for yourselves, keep your heads down, and if you change things, be subtle about it. And remember, stand up for yourselves, and what you believe in, and PLEASE, be smart." Narcissa urged, trying to prevent the mistakes of the other timeline.
"Yes Mum/Narcissa." The duo said as they hugged the shapely blond.
"Harry, I know you don't need to be told this, but please, take care of my daughter." Dan said, giving Harry a brief hug and a pat on the back.
"You know I will Dan." Harry said, briefly stiffening up before relaxing.
"I'm going to miss you two so much, but it's only until the holidays, and then I'll introduce you to your aunt. I'll be expecting a letter or email within a week." Narcissa said, small tears beginning to pool in her eyes.
"I'll miss you too Mum/Narcissa." The duo said before slowly going through the portal, waving to their family right before they went through.
"Alright, the hard part is over. Now, here comes the fun part." Narcissa giggled, eager for what was about to happen, Dan and Emma joining her. The trio quickly went behind a pillar, keeping an eye on the entrance. Sure enough, the people they were waiting for arrived, the family of six, normally late magicals arrived a few minutes earlier, not in a panic and actually having enough time to focus.
"Evil bitch. The one time you're not late is suspiciously the same year Harry is going to Hogwarts. Once you had him, you barely made it here."
"This place is just packed with muggles. What's the number of the platform again, dear?" Molly said loudly, easily heard over all the noise going on. As she 'fussed' over her children, she kept subtly looking around, as if looking for something, or more specifically, someone.
"Nine and three quarters mum, it's right there. Is everything alright mum? I mean, we were all here just a few months ago, as well as coming here every year. Did something happen to you?" Ginny said, pointing towards the entrance awkwardly. The rest of the family shuffled around a bit when she said that, allowing the trio to see that she was using a pair of non magical crutches
"Alright, that's new." Narcissa mused, raised an eyebrow in surprise. The only daughter was balancing herself on the crutches, her legs barely standing on the ground, as if she was afraid they'd give out any second.
"Oh you fucking abusive bitch, what the hell did you and your family do?" Narcissa raged, the elder Grangers mirroring her thoughts.
"I'm fine Ginerva, I'm just-" Molly attempted to say, trying to steer away from the topic when Narcissa made her way to the family.
"Excuse me, but may I ask what you're doing?" She accused, crossing her arms under her impressive bosom, intentionally pushing them up and making them look bigger. Her efforts were rewarded, as she saw Molly immediately get worked up, and to her internal disgust, the boys were staring at her, Ron not even attempting to hide his actions.
"This doesn't concern you miss, so mind your own business." The redheaded hadrian snapped at the, in her mind, scarlet woman.
"Well, considering the fact you're blatantly breaking the Statute of Secrecy, or up to something nefarious or even criminal, I think I do have a right to be concerned." Narcissa said confidently, not backing down as she stared down the plump harpy.
"Breaking the Statute? Criminal? What makes you think that?" Molly said nervously, rearing back a bit in shock at the obvious accusation.
"You're on the muggle side of the platform, looking for the entrance to Platform 9 ¾, despite the obvious fact you have four children ready to go, three of them well into their Hogwarts years, so you should know where it is. Young lady, where is Platform 9 ¾?" Narcissa said, pointing out her clear and obvious evidence before turning to Ginny.
"Right over there miss, I remember it from a few months ago." Ginny admitted, smart enough to know that what her mother was attempting to do was wrong and not wanting to cross the woman who caught them red handed.
"That's what I thought. Excuse me, Auror!" Narcissa said smugly before calling over a rather plain looking Auror.
"Can I help you miss?" The auror drawled lazily as he made his way over, his eyes shamelessly roaming up and down Narcissa's body.
"Yes, I saw this woman right here attempting to break the Statute of Secrecy. She was going on loudly about muggles, where's Platform 9 ¾, and all that. Her children can confirm that." Narcissa informed, gesturing to the Weasleys as she ignored the Auror's staring.
"Is that true?" He inquired, now noticeably more alert at the prospect of someone attempting to break their most important law.
"Yes sir. Is something wrong with my mum, she's never acted like this before." Ginny confirmed, worried about her mum.
"Let me check." He said seriously before waving his wand over the Weasley matriarch, and sure enough, nothing came up.
"No young lady, your mother is fine. No charms or compulsions on her. As for you, can I have your name?" He said, alleviating Ginny's fears as he glared at Molly.
"Molly Weasley." She ground out, visibly irritated at the fact her obvious plan was foiled.
"Oh, you're Arthur's wife. Anyway, 25 galleon fine for attempting to break the Statute of Secrecy. I don't know what you were thinking, but you should know better at this point." He sneered as he wrote down her name on a piece of parchment.
"25 galleons!? We can't afford that!" Molly shrieked loudly, drawing numerous stares from the non magicals.
"Well you should've thought of that before breaking one of our most important laws. Thank you for informing me about this miss, have a good day." The auror said gratefully, his gaze lingering on Narcissa's body before reluctantly leaving.
"Uurgh, insufferable harlot. Ronald, Fred, George, Percy, I'll be expecting letters by the end of the week. Come along Ginerva." She muttered, sending her sons away through the platform with no trouble, as well practically dragging Ginny behind her.
"Wow." Ginny muttered, somewhat in a state of shock at the fact someone both stood up to her mother, and easily smacked her down.
"Pardon me." Narcissa said, walking toward the car with a bit of a sway in her steps, sending her wide hips and large bum into motion. Stepping into her car with the Grangers, she caught sight of Molly's looks of jealousy and anger. Despite being completely ignorant of the non magical world, Molly could tell that the vehicle Narcissa entered was leagues more valuable than the one Arthur had, and quite possibly worth more than a year or more of his salary.
Inside the train, the duo began to settle down in a compartment near the end of the train, in an attempt to minimize the amount of fanboys and fangirls seeking Harry out.
"Alright, this looks like a good spot for an hour or two. I just want to relax for a few hours, except for when that Weasley kid shows up. Knowing him, he'll put his foot in his mouth and we'll have a reason to tell him to leave. Regardless, he's going to be leaving by the time Susan and Daphne arrive." Harry said, not looking forward to the inevitable arrival of the jackass who caused their doppelgangers so much trouble and anguish.
"Sounds like a plan. I think I'm just going to read for a bit. What are you going to do?" Hermione said, plopping down near a window and pulling out a book.
"I think I'll either play on my handheld or watch a movie on my tablet. Either way I'll have headphones in." Harry replied, taking the seat right to her and using his bag as a makeshift pillow.
"Okay then. Just don't get too sucked into it, I don't want to throttle you to get you to respond." Hermione laughed, affectionately patting Harry on the leg. The duo sat there in relative silence, more than content to simply be in each other's company. Unfortunately, all good things must come to an end, and not even 30 minutes after the train started moving, there was a knock on the door. Before either of them could say something, the door was almost ripped open by a tall, gangly redhead. The duo scrunched their noses in disgust at the sight of his appearance. His clothes were dirty, appeared haphazardly thrown on, and they swore he stunk a bit.
"Can I sit with you guys? Everywhere else is full." He asked, his eyes darting around a bit, as if he was looking for something.
"Everywhere else is full my arse. This year, the previous ones and the following year are logically the ones with the smallest class size, no thanks to Voldemort and his minions killing so many people." Hermione thought
"If you want, although you WILL be leaving when a few people we agreed to sit with previously come." Hermione said in a voice that meant it was final.
"What are you guys doing?" Ron asked to try to spark a conservation.
Hermione showed him her book and Harry showed him the screen of his tablet Ron tried again, seeing as this tactic wasn't working.
"Do you know what house you are in?"
"We will let whatever makes the decision decide. As it probably has a lot of experience doing so, although based on what I read, I'm likely to go to Slytherin. " Harry said.
"I wouldn't go into Slytherin mate. Nothing but dark and evil wizards came from there." Ron said softly.
"Bullshit. Why in the name of all logic would they have a house filled and made for just for evil? Nevermind the fact that if it were the case, Slytherin would've been disbanded centuries ago." Harry snapped.
"What do you think of Quidditich?" Ron asked, ignoring another obvious fact.
Hermione began ranting.
"It is a very dangerous sport and it should be banned. Putting your life at risk for a sport is pointless. Throwing things at people to knock them off a broom is being irresponsible and completely suicidal. Anyone with a lick of intelligence would see how stupid it is." She said heatedly.
Ron quickly asked Harry to try to stop the lecture.
"How about you mate?" He asked, his eyes basically pleading for someone to take his side.
"I agree with Hermione, 100 percent, and I'm not your mate." Harry said, swiping his finger across the screen.
"By the way, I am Ron Weasley." Ron said pompously, finally remembering to introduce himself.
"Hermione Granger." Hermione said disinterested.
"Harry Potter" Harry said equally disinterested, perhaps even more
"Are you really, the Harry Potter?" Ron said excitedly.
"I am Harry Potter." He confirmed, glaring at Ron a bit.
"Do you have the scar? Can I see it?" He asked giddily, practically bouncing in his seat. Harry reluctantly pushed his hair up, revealing a perfectly smooth forehead.
"Aww man, it's gone! Why did you do that mate?" Ron muttered in disappointment.
"It was unsightly and a constant reminder of what I lost that night. Always hated the thing." Harry snarled, repulsed by the redhead's lack of sensitivity.
"Well, I think that was a mistake. I mean, it's one of the things that makes you famous. So what was it like fighting that dragon or that vampire?" Ron rambled, ignoring Harry's obvious rage.
"I don't remember doing any of those things. You must have got me mixed up with someone else." Harry ground out, just about ready to strangle him.
Hermione was trying hard not to either start laughing or start to strangle the Weasley. She hid it by pretending to read her book.
Ron kept describing all the things that the fictional character from the children's books had done. While Harry kept denying ever doing any of those things. After a while Harry got tired of it and went back to reading, ignoring the constant flow of words coming from Ron's mouth.
"He's not under any compulsion or other mind altering magic. This is all him." Hermione texted Harry.
"Was my counterpart really this dense or stupid? It should've been clear he was a fanboy immediately when he started gushing about that damn scar." He texted back.
"We can't rule out the possibility we were spelled or potioned to act like that in the other timeline. Remember, rape is basically legal here, not to mention the fact muggleborns and halfbloods have little to no rights as Purebloods. You weren't immune to it, as even being The-Boy-Who-Lived didn't protect you from this kind of despicable stuff. Also, you were abused, and he's the first person your age who showed you a lick of kindness, you'd latch onto that and ignore or forgive all the bad." Hermione messaged again.
"Yup, gotta be vigilant. We'll check people we know to be first generation or halfbloods at Hogwarts for this kind of stuff. Another thing to use against Dumbledore and the other countries, and yeah, you're probably right, but still, my counterpart is a dumbass." Harry suggested.
"Harry, Hermione, it's me and Susan. May we come in?" Daphne said from outside the compartment, knocking politely on the door.
"Yeah you can, just watch out, we're a bit cramped in here at the moment." Harry said back loudly, making sure her and Susan could hear her. Getting up, Harry opened the door to reveal he and his soulmate's wives. Almost immediately, Ron shot up in outrage, sneering at the blonde.
"What are you doing here, Greengrass?" He hissed out venomously.
"I am one of the people Harry and Hermione invited to sit with them. What's it matter to you, you're supposed to be leaving anyway." Daphne shot back, staring back with an icy glare. She was dressed
"Considering the fact that the rest of your family deals with Dark stuff, I'm just trying to keep my mate safe." Ron explained, attempting to drape an arm around Harry's shoulder, only to be rebuffed.
"I never agreed to be your friend. All I said is you can sit here until Susan and Daphne come. Look, I'm willing to give you a chance Ron but only if you're willing to accept my other friends. Now please leave, we can talk some other time, and DON'T bring her family into this." Harry offered, subtly shoving Ron out of the compartment.
"Alright I guess. Just watch out for her, her entire family has a reputation." Ron advised before leaving, shooting Daphne one last glare.
"So does yours, you arsehole." Hermione thought.
"Just give us a second you two." Harry said, moving some things around to make room for their two new additions.
"You're not really going to be friends with him are you?" Hermione whispered to him, having unmoved from her spot.
"Of course I'm not going to be friends with the fucking git. Just wanted to sit with 'The Great Harry Potter' and get some second hand 'glory'. Considering the shite his alternate self pulled to both you and the other me over the years, the sheer size and amounts of problems he brings just aren't worth the good." Harry ranted.
"Clearly and good riddance. Just, be careful with other Purebloods or wizard raised people. Besides Luna, and maybe Susan and Daphne, odds are everyone is going to be a fanboy or fangirl." Hermione said logically.
"Ugh, don't remind me. The other Ginny told me she never lost her crush on me. Now, it's one thing if you're the average guy, but it's a completely different story if that someone is the most famous person alive." Harry said sagely.
"Agreed."
"Alright, come on in." Harry beckoned, gesturing to the seats across from him and Hermione.
"Thank you for removing Weasley. I bloody hate that arsehole." Susan thanked, sitting down and pulling up her top, which admittedly didn't do much. She was dressed in a skirt that went past her knees, while her blouse was didn't do much to contain her bust, forcing her to show off a bit of cleavage.
"What did he do to you Susan?" Daphne asked, smoothing out her skirt. Unlike Susan, she was dressed in traditional Pureblood clothes, aka the only thing that was exposed was her hands, while her clothing left much to the imagination.
"Well, my Aunt wanted me to try and make more friends and he seemed nice at first. We invited him to my house for a bit, but all we did was what he wanted to do. Whenever I wanted to do something, he'd be mean and throw a fit. Plus, after he left a few of my things were missing."
"Jesus Christ. I'm so sorry to hear that Susan. Just, Harry's waiting for a good excuse to ditch him. God knows what he'll tell other people and that makes our lives hell, so he's just waiting for the right moment." Hermione said tiredly.
"Hmmm, that is a good plan. Perhaps even worthy of the Slytherin house." Daphne mused, bringing her hand up to her chin in thought.
"Perhaps, so what have you two been up to since we last saw each other?" Harry asked earnestly, looking between the both of them.
"It was uneventful. My parents just took me to get my school supplies and I occasionally spent some with my younger sister and my other friend, Tracey Davis." Daphne drawled.
"In that case, I'd like to meet them one day. What about you Susan?" Hermione asked, finally finishing her chapter and now facing the duo.
"Basically the same as Daphne, although I did a bit of clothes shopping as well." She said giddily, gesturing to her outfit.
"That's nice. Harry likes to go shopping as well so maybe you two could go together at some time." Hermione offered, grinning at Harry's smile at the prospect.
"Yes, that does sound fun. What about you two? What have two love birds been doing?" Daphne teased, pointing towards the duo.
"Mostly reading, watching TV and playing video games and going outside. It's not much but we enjoy it." Harry said, talking as if this was an everyday occurrence, which it was, Hermione nodding in confirmation.
"What's a TV? Daphne inquired with a raised eyebrow.
"What is a video game?" Susan asked, leaning forward in curiosity, unintentionally showing off her bust.
"Fuck I forgot, you two and the rest of Magical Europe are isolated and behind most of the world. Basically, a TV is something non magicals invented that works like your moving pictures, only instead of playing the same few seconds, they can play hundreds of thousands of different things with sound and color, all day, every day." Hermione lectured, blushing as she rolled her eyes away from Susan's breasts.
"Yeah it's awesome. They've got so many options. Anyway, a video game, the best way I can describe it is a more complicated yet involved game than what you guys play. You can either plug it into the TV or you can bring a smaller one with you, like this thing." Harry said passionately, smiling as he turned on his DS. Sitting in between the two girls, inadvertently pressing against Susan's chest, he showed them the game he was playing, the digital character performing a variety of different actions and effects unseen to the two magicals.
"Merlin, this is incredible! And you said muggles made this?" Susan gasped, leaning onto Harry a bit, not that he noticed.
"I said NON MAGICALS made this but yes, they did make this and hundreds of other things like this." Harry corrected a bit rudely before going back to the game.
"Amazing, and they did this without magic?" Daphne asked in wonderment, carefully trying the game, giggling a bit as she did what Harry instructed.
"All this and more. Like, I bet there's a few things non magicals have beat witches and wizards at. C'mon tell me something you guys have done or made." Harry urged, curious as to what they thought was a crowning achievement.
"Well, we have this thing called the floo. How it works is you throw a powder into an active fireplace, and it turns green. Then, it allows you to talk to someone face to face even if they're in another house. Heck, you can even travel with it. The only downsides is that you're on your knees during this, you need a fireplace, and the other person needs to be on the floo network. And I'm pretty sure there have been a few incidents of accidental decapitation." Susan said nonchalantly, unbothered at the possibility of head severing.
"Excuse me what the fuck?" Harry squeaked in terror.
"Yeah it's sad. You have to say the name of the place you want to go to, but you have to stand completely in the fire when you do that. A good chunk of the victims were just talking and they just said the name of some place and poof!" Daphne explained, looking at her nails lazily.
"Yeah, that's a win for the non magicals. We have instant communication anywhere in the world right here!" Hermione announced proudly before pulling out her phone. She and Harry swapped places and turned on the device.
"It's called a cell phone, and it fits right in your pocket. With it, you call anyone, almost anywhere. You can call someone across the world from your house, at a store, anywhere. The best part is you don't have to be on your knees all day." Hermione summarized, showing off the numerous features, as well as a brief glimpse into the internet. The purebloods enjoyed the cats.
"This is incredible. When was this thing made?" Daphne gushed, nervously mimicking Hermione's actions and touching the screen, mesmerized.
"The first cell phone was invented in 1973 and this one was made in 2009. The first one was basically a giant brick but they kept getting smaller over the years. This one can play movies, music, some games, browse the internet and a few other things." Hermione lectured
"What's the internet?" Susan asked dumbly, leaning over onto Hermione's other side, her breasts dangerously close to her face.
"We're going to be doing this a lot, aren't we? The internet is basically a Ravenclaws wet dream. Millions of books worth of knowledge at your fingertips. Any topics, whether it's fiction, non fiction and everything in between. Just, all this stuff is something we should discuss at some other point, when we have more time. Just keep an open mind to the idea that everything you thought you knew was wrong." Hermione said proudly before taking tone of exasperation
"Alright, if you say so. So, you mind showing us how these things work more?" Daphne asked skeptically.
"We'll be more than happy to!" Harry gushed, before proceeding to sit on Susan's other side.
"Attention passengers, we are nearing Hogwarts, so please change into your robes at this time." A disembodied voice sounded throughout the train.
"Jesus that went by fast. Alright, I'll just head to the loo to change and give you girls some privacy." Harry announced before grabbing his 'robes' and heading out.
Left to themselves, the trio began stripping off their clothing, leaving them in nothing but their knickers.
"Merlin Susan, what the bloody hell have you been eating?" Daphne nearly shouted, pointing a finger dangerously close towards Susan's mammoth breasts. The pale orbs were clad in pale yellow bra that, despite its efforts, clearly were in a losing battle.
"I haven't been eating anything different, it's just a family thing. You should see my Aunt and my Mum's portrait. These girls are nowhere near ready." Susan boasted proudly, thrusting her chest out a bit and making them seem larger than they were.
"Jesus Christ, you're going to be popular." Daphne admitted, sneaking a few glimpses at the redhead's body, Hermione doing the same as they threw on their robes.. While Susan wasn't the thinnest girl, having a bit of a belly, the fact she had some of the largest breasts of her age group, and would no doubt get bigger as she got older, more than made up for that downside. At least in Hermione's mind.
"Hmmm, good to know." Susan said as she threw her robe on, which did little to hide her chest.
"Susan and Daphne are clean. No charms or compulsions on them, just like the Weasley." Hermione texted, subtly waving her hand and checking them.
"We should just check everyone we meet, especially the first gen. I'd rather be a bit paranoid than get hurt." Harry responded.
"Agreed. Seriously, I think the magically raised are just stupid by default. Remember all that magic floating around Diagon Alley? I think it might've been affecting the first gen to make them dumber, if how my doppelganger acted is any indication." Hermione brought up, making a good point.
Harry stuck his phone into one of his pockets before transfiguring a sheet into a copy of the school robes. He wasn't going to pay for the stupidity/lack of logic of European magicals. Leaving the loo, he accidentally rammed into a larger boy.
"Oof, sorry about that mate." Neville apologized, backing up from the smaller black haired boy he bumped into.
"It's fine." He reassured him, giving the larger boy a pat on the shoulder as he squeezed past him. Unfortunately, Neville's bad luck wasn't over as before he could even move again, the ladies room opened up and a larger girl walked out, actually managing to send him to the floor.
"Oh Merlin, I'm so sorry about that. Are you okay?" A somewhat rough, but still very feminine voice asked from above him.
"Yeah, I think I'm fine." Neville got out, still a bit shaken up, not particularly paying attention.
"Here let me help you up." She offered, extending a hand downward. Neville grasped it and to his utmost surprise, he was hauled to his feet almost effortlessly.
"Thank you, I'm Neville Longbottom." He thanked, now taking in his companions' appearance. The first thing that he noticed was that she was bigger than him. While he'll admit he wasn't the smallest guy his age, she was noticeably much bigger than him. Gazing down, he noted her breasts were big, although not the biggest he's seen. What was probably her most prominent feature was the fact she was pretty fat, with a large gut pressing tightly against her shirt and very nearly pressing up against him. Supporting her large frame was a wide pair of hips that no doubt had a large bum to match. Going back up to her face, he'll admit that while she wasn't the most beautiful girl out there, she had uniqueness about her: while not overly feminine, Neville found that they complimented and perhaps enhanced the slight roughness that accompanied them. Finally, she had long, black hair that cascaded down hair.
"I'm Millicent Bulstrode, and it was no trouble. See you at the sorting?" She asked hopefully, giving him a shy smile, revealing perfectly white teeth.
"Yeah, I'll see you there." He grinned dopily, Millicent grinning back before leaving.
Eventually, the express pulled to a stop, allowing the four students to disembark and make their way to the boats that would take them to Hogwarts. Getting into a boat, they caught sight of an absolutely massive, very hairy man trying to keep order and direct everyone into boats.
"Ugh, this guy." Harry thought scornfully, a small scowl on his face.
"You can't be too mad at Hagrid, Harry. He has the best intentions at heart." Hermione texted Harry, seeing the look on Harry's face, and having an idea of what he was thinking.
"I know that but at the same time, those 'best' intentions have caused MANY problems. I mean, I know he didn't intend to do it, but he still kidnapped me and I suffered for years because of it. Not to mention what happened at Hogwarts because of him." He texted back rapidly, pissed off at the suffering he went through.
"I know that Harry, just, be reasonable with him." She begged, gently placing a hand on his forearm.
Before they even realized it, Hogwarts was right in front of them. Despite their emotions, the duo, along with everyone else couldn't help but marvel at the ancient castle. Hard to believe that such a beautiful place hid unbelievable horrors both inside, as well blinding the first generation students to the dystopian society that was Magical Britain, and to a greater extent Europe.
Leaving the boats, Harry barely made it a few feet before he got a headache. Wincing in pain, he didn't need to be a genius to figure the wards of Hogwarts were trying to affect him, no courtesy of Dumbledore. Ignoring it, all he bothered to figure out is that it was trying to make him be friends with the Weasleys, and to listen to Dumbledore himself, with the likelihood of there being many more spells trying to control him.
Shrugging it off, courtesy of the bracelet, Harry and co made their way through the castle where they found themselves in a large room, where an older, stern looking witch was waiting for them. Harry and Hermione couldn't help but narrow their eyes at Minerva McGonagall, the witch who let so much bullshit happen over the years, and a few times led to either students nearly dying, or in the case of first year, nearly let Voldemort get away with the Flamel's stone.
"Welcome to Hogwarts," said Professor McGonagall. "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room.
"Like a family my arse. Been bullied multiple times over the years and you didn't do shite, as well as all the times students were in danger. Basically forcing me on the stupid Quidditch team, the Stone, the Heir of Slytherin, what happened to me during the Goblet, Umbridge fucking torturing me. So much fucking bullshit." The duo mocked, rolling their eyes at the Deputy lying to their faces.
"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rulebreaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours."
"The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting." She advised before leaving, shooting Weasley a quick, disapproving glance. As the four of them stood there, a pasty, blonde teen made his way to Harry, arrogance in his steps.
"I'm Draco Malfoy. It's a good thing I came to find you. My father has told me all about you and a man of your status certainly shouldn't be forced to hang around with the wrong sort like them." He stuck out his hand completely missing Harry's narrowed eyes.
"Mr. Malfoy, I'd sooner give up my magic than be even an acquaintance of yours. I know of your father and what he's done. Couldn't even stand proudly by his ideals like your Aunt. Please, never speak or even go near me again. This is your only warning." Harry drawled lazily, not even bothering to look at the inbred nazi.
"Better watch it Potter. Wouldn't do you any good to be an enemy of a Malfoy." Draco sneered, which somehow made him look even more unnerving and disgusting.
"Your father's cowardly master couldn't even kill a baby and he worshipped the ground Voldemort pissed on. What hope does he, let alone you have? Please, go away, I feel myself losing genetic diversity just by looking at your inbred self." Harry taunted, looking at his nails before shooing the racist away.
Suddenly, one of the students in the group gasped, and Harry thought they'd reacted at Weasley swearing. Then he saw the real reason while others screamed.
About twenty ghosts had just streamed through the back wall. Pearly-white and slightly transparent, they glided across the room talking to one another and hardly glancing at the first years. They seemed to be arguing. What looked like a fat little monk was saying: "Forgive and forget, I say, we ought to give him a second chance-"
"My dear Friar, haven't we given Peeves all the chances he deserves?" A ghost wearing a ruff and tights, said, "He gives us all a bad name and you know, he's not really even a ghost - I say, what are you all doing here?"
The ghost had suddenly noticed the first years.
Nobody answered, although Harry and Hermione opted to stare at them unimpressed.
"New students!" said the Fat Friar, smiling around at them. "About to be Sorted, I suppose?"
A few people nodded mutely.
"Hope to see you in Hufflepuff!" said the Friar. "My old house, you know."
"Move along now," said a sharp voice. "The Sorting Ceremony's about to start."
Professor McGonagall had returned. One by one, the ghosts floated away through the opposite wall.
"Now, form a line," Professor McGonagall told the first years, "and follow me."
They walked out of the chamber, back across the hall, and through a pair of double doors into the Great Hall.
Harry had never even imagined such a strange, splendid yet simple place. It was lit by thousands and thousands of candles that were floating in midair over four long tables, where the rest of the students were sitting. These tables were laid with glittering golden plates and goblets. At the top of the hall was another long table where the teachers were sitting. Professor McGonagall led the first years up here, so that they came to a halt in a line facing the other students, with the teachers behind them. The hundreds of faces staring at them looked like pale lanterns in the flickering candlelight. Dotted here and there among the students, the ghosts shone misty silver. Mainly to avoid all the staring eyes, Harry looked upward and saw a velvety black ceiling dotted with stars. It was hard to believe there was a ceiling there at all, and that the Great Hall didn't simply open on to the heavens. Despite being behind most of the world, he had to admit, it was a beautiful sight.
Harry quickly looked down again as Professor McGonagall silently placed a four-legged stool in front of the first years. On top of the stool she put a pointed wizard's hat. This hat was patched and frayed and extremely dirty. Aunt Petunia wouldn't have let it in a few miles of her house if she wasn't in prison.
Noticing that everyone in the hall was now staring at the hat, he stared at it, too. For a few seconds, there was complete silence. Then the hat twitched. A rip near the brim opened wide like a mouth - and the hat began to sing.
[Insert Sorting Hat Song here, if you wish, dear readers!]
The whole hall burst into applause as the hat finished its song. It bowed to each of the four tables and then became quite still again.
"When I call your name, please come up and place the hat on your head and you will be sorted."
"ABBOTT, HANNAH!" A round, pink-faced girl with blonde pigtails stumbled out of line, put on the hat, which fell right down over her eyes, and sat down.
"HUFFLEPUFF!"
"BONES, SUSAN!" The busty redhead made her way to the hat, a few encouraging pats on her back, courtesy of the trio, and placed it on her head. "HUFFLEPUFF!" It shouted, to the applause of the Great Hall, Harry, Hermione and Daphne clapping a little more energetically than the others.
"BROWN, LAVENDER!" The busty blonde made her way to the stool, Hermione and Harry looking at her with sympathy, Hermione more than Harry. The very fact that Ron could use a girl, one who gave him so much love and attention and just wanted to be with him, just to hurt Hermione and throw her away like it was nothing made her blood boil. Like last time, she was sorted to Gryffindor.
"BULSTRODE, MILLICENT!" The larger girl tentatively made her way to the I'll fitting stool. Placing the hat on her head, it's 'face' scrunching up in confusion before making its decision. "SLYTHERIN!" It shouted. While there was some applause, it was extremely subdued, as if everyone but Slytherin did it out of basic courtesy. However, Harry and Hermione took note that Neville was matching the Slytherin table's output.
"DAVIS, TRACEY!" A dark haired, relatively curveless witch made her way to the stool, Daphne showing some excitement for her friend. "SLYTHERIN!"
"GRANGER, HERMIONE!" Hermione took a deep breath before confidentially making her way to the stool, although not before Harry gave her a chaste kiss on her cheek. Sitting down, she gently placed it on her head, a devilish smirk on her face. "OH GODS! GRYFFINDOR!" The hat shouted. Taking the hat off, she placed it back down with care, staring at it once again very briefly, making the garment shudder a bit before she made her way to the Gryffindor table.
"GREENGRASS, DAPHNE!" The blonde schooled her features, not even acknowledging Harry's pats on the back before sitting down elegantly. "SLYTHERIN!" Daphne made her way to join Tracey, Harry, Hermione and Susan, the only ones matching the Slytherins' enthusiasm.
"LONGBOTTOM, NEVILLE!" The larger boy made his way over nervously, trying to ignore the stare of everyone as he placed the hat on. "GRYFFINDOR!" It shouted after a few seconds. Making his way over, Harry and Hermione noted that he wasn't that clumsy this time around.
"MALFOY, DRACO!" The blonde strutted over to the stool and before he could place it on his head, it shouted. "Ugh, SLYTHERIN! CAN SOMEONE CLEAN ME AFTER THIS OVER? I WANT THAT HAIR GEL GONE BEFORE IT STAINS."
Everyone chuckled a bit at that, easing the tension a bit. Realizing he was coming up soon, Harry focused his thoughts, drowning out the outside world. This was it. Years of training and planning all led to this moment. Avenging his parents, bringing Dumbledore, Voldemort and whoever else to justice, and foiling the plans of the family who took advantage of Hermione and himself for their own gains.
"POTTER, HARRY!" Harry made his way to the stool, head held high. He ignored the stares and whispers of the students and barely gave the teachers a glance. Taking a deep breath, he sat on the stool and put the hat on his head.
"Another student with knowledge of a possible future?" The hat exclaimed.
"Yup. I'm sure I don't have to tell you to keep quiet about this?" Harry asked, letting the hat scan his memories.
"You are right, young man. Apart from the fact I can't share what I see in your head to others without your permission, the fact that things are likely going to Hell is another incentive to keep quiet. Merlin knows what the headmaster would do with this revelation. Let alone what you and your mate would do to me." The hat said fearfully.
"Glad to know we are on the same page, Hat. Anything else before you sort me?" Harry said smugly.
"If it's not too much trouble, could you try and save Slytherin's Basilisk this time? If not, don't bring me or Fawkes into it." The hat asked.
"I'll do my best. Wait, before you sort me, can we fuck with Dumbledore real quick?" Harry asked, a cheesy grin on his face.
"Let me see, ohohohohoh, yes, this will be fun." The hat chuckled.
"SLYTHERIN!"
The entire hall went dead silent, save for Hermione trying to silence her laughter. Nobody could fathom the idea that their hero could be anywhere but Gryffindor. None look more shocked, angry or afraid than Snape or Dumbledore. Snape looked like he was going to have an aneurysm on the spot, the mere thought of a Potter being in his house filling him with unbridled rage.
Dumbledore looked like he was going to have a heart attack, numerous worst case scenarios running through his head. Did the Dursleys go too far with their 'love and care'? Did his scar start influencing him? Did it take over the boy? There was no scar left on his forehead, long since healed. The youngest Weasley son wasn't by his side, so perhaps they didn't meet each other. Dumbledore tried to read his future martyrs thoughts, only to get nothing. Legitimately nothing. Just emptiness. This was troubling.
"Wait a second, nevermind, thought I saw something, HE'S GRYFFINDOR!" The hat corrected itself, shouting out the correct house for the child. The entire hall immediately roared in a deafening applause
"WE GOT POTTER! WE GOT POTTER!" He heard the Twins yell.
"Annoying jerks." He thought with an eye roll as he plopped down next to Hermione, who gave him a one armed hug.
"GRYFFINDOR!" He heard, just in time to see Weasley make his way near him, sitting down a couple seats away from him. Obviously trying to be near him without making it too obvious. Turning back, his gaze matched with Hermione, which said all he needed to hear.
"Just deal with him for a bit and then he's out of our lives. You can do this Harry."
"Thank you, Professor McGonagall, for leading another historic Sorting!" Albus said. "Welcome students, new and those who have returned, to another wonderful year of learning, studying, and filling your heads with fluff! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak! Thank you!"
"He's fucking insane." Harry muttered, putting on a moderate portion of various foods on his plate, avoiding much of the food provided.
"Clearly." Hermione drawled, who put on a bit more food than Harry on her plate. The duo wordlessly dug, joining their fellow students in the feast.
"Hey Harry, how come you're eating so little? We got all this food just sitting here, so eat your fill."
"Two reasons: one, I don't want to get fat, and two, my doctor told me I'm on a semi-strict diet for a while and I intend to follow it." Harry said, stating both the obvious, and the fact it was true. For the five or six years (he lost count) he suffered at the Dursleys, he obviously didn't get enough to eat, which severely affected him. His mum took him to a few different doctors, all who recommended a strict diet plan.
Once they went to America, that was doubly so. Despite the fact magic was more advanced there, it could only do so much for his damaged body, as even magic had limits. While he wouldn't be the shortest in the world, it would be estimated that he'd 5'4 at the most.
"I don't know what that muggle is thinking. He doesn't know what your body needs." Ron said dismissively, sounding like an idiot.
"Like you know better Weasley? I'd think I'd trust the word of someone who spent years doing this as opposed to you, who I've never met before." Harry fired back, glaring at the stupidity or ignorance of the Pureblood redhead. He and his family may claim to be supportive and love non magicals, but their actions, words, behavior and overall attitude says otherwise.
"Ahem," Dumbledore cleared his throat, "just a few more words now that we are all fed and watered. I have a few start-of-term notices to give you."
"First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden to all pupils. And a few of our older students would do well to remember that as well."
Dumbledore's twinkling eyes flashed in the direction of Fred and George Weasley.
"I have also been asked by Mr. Filch, the caretaker, to remind you all that no magic should be used between classes in the corridors.
"Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of the term. After some deliberation, I've elected to lift the ban on First Years playing Quidditich, provided that they can prove they know both the rules, and how to fly properly. Anyone interested in playing for their house teams should contact Madam Hooch."
"And finally, I must tell you that this year, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a very painful death."
"What a load of crap. Three first years got past it no problem, and one of them was barely useful."
"And now, before we go to bed, let us sing the school song!" cried Dumbledore. Harry and Hermione smirked and chuckled demonically under their breath as they noticed that the other teachers' smiles had become rather fixed. Immediately and subtly, the duo placed a spell on themselves to block the incoming noise, aware of the hell that was coming.
Dumbledore gave his wand a little flick, as if he was trying to get a fly off the end, and a long golden ribbon flew out of it, which rose high above the tables and twisted itself, snakelike, into words.
"Everyone pick their favorite tune," said Dumbledore, "and off we go!"
*insert Hogwarts Hell Song*
Everybody finished the song at different times. At last, only the Weasley twins were left singing along to a very slow funeral march. Dumbledore conducted their last few lines with his wand and when they had finished, he was one of those who clapped loudest.
"Ah, music," he said, wiping his eyes. "A magic beyond all we do here! And now, bedtime. Off you trot!"
"Ugh, finally."
A couple hours later, Harry and Hermione were sitting together on a couch near the fire in the Gryffindor common room. Around them were their various dorm mates and upper housemates. The duo were checking over all their stuff, making sure there were no spells, charms, etc on them, and to no surprise, they found a few different tracking charms as well as some compulsion charms on every single item. Lucky for them, they were applied sloppily and they removed them all with ease.
"So how do you think you'll be with Lavender and Parvati? I know in the alternate timeline you barely interacted with them but since you have a mostly different personality…." Harry asked
"I think we'll be fine. While we won't be best friends, I want things so I can at least have them in my corner and vice versa. After all, they're gossips, we can use that." Hermione stated,
"Oh how delightfully Slytherin Hermione. As for the other guys, other than Neville, they don't have much we can use, so I'll probably do things the same. Like Seamus and Dean, in fourth year put up with Ron for a month, but it seemed like Ron came crawling back after the dragon, so they likely had it with him, so it's safe to say if Ron goes spouting his bullshit, they won't take his side. Unless Dumbledore gets involved. Then again, Ron monopolized my time and acted as a deterrent to everyone else. Seriously, you'd think that more people would try to be friends with me." Harry ranted, angry at his doppelganger's stupidity.
"Unless he gets involved indeed. Just, I really don't want to get attached to anyone here, cause were fucking leaving during fourth year, if things go to plan. Why do you think I'm keeping Susan and Daphne at arms length? We'll be leaving them in a heartbeat, and while Fleur and Luna might come with us, it's unlikely." Harry continued, lying back against the couch in annoyance at the whole situation.
"Hmmmmm."
"What are you thinking of Hermione?" Harry asked, lifting his head just enough to look at Hermione.
"What if we don't have to leave them behind?" Hermione offered.
"What are you talking about?" Harry asked, sitting up intently.
"Considering how your Mum was, well, is a Pureblood who grew up as pure, anti non magical as it gets, and she left the magical side with almost no problem, what if we convince the four of them to do so as well? If your Mum did it, the four of them should be almost no problem. Why stop there though? After all, you're a famous celebrity and we can use that. Ask people a few questions, a suggestion here and there. This whole thing could be leagues easier than if it was just the two of us. High risk, high reward kind of bullshit." Hermione rambled, explaining the gist of her 'so crazy, it just might work' plan.
"Why the hell are we, and by that I mean you, in Gryffindor instead of Slytherin." Harry deadpanned.
"Wouldn't be very Slytherin if I told you, would it?" Hermione said cheekily.
"*sigh*yeah, you're right." Harry admitted
"Alright, it's starting to get late, let's plug in our phones and we talk about that plan of yours again later. Night love." Hermione said tiredly, blowing him a kiss before heading to the girls dorms.
"Good night." Harry said before heading into his bed
"Look out Dumbledore. For decades you've been manipulating people without any trouble. Now, let's see how you'll hold up when you actually have to try." Harry thought evilly, before using a spell to make him fall asleep instantly.
AN: I just want to get it out of the way, I'm not a fan of nutrient potions and whatnot magically fixing the abuse Harry went through. This is a kid who was malnourished for almost a decade, who then either ate like garbage, or went through periods of starvation again. Not to mention the fact that every year, he goes through many body destroying situations. Google says the average male height in the UK was 5'7. Since I'm using Daniel Radcliffe to portray Harry, who is 5'5, who is also a healthy person, Harry honestly shouldn't be anywhere near 6'0 IMO. Harry isn't going to be tall, he suffered so much and magic can't fix everything.
Just, I can't really put the whole thought process into words coherently, but I'll sum it up as this: Harry should be relatively short in canon, so in this fic, he's only going to have 2 or 3 individuals of the harem/polyamory be shorter than him, the rest will either be his height or taller. Deal with it.
Anyway, I'll see you guys next time, next chapter it's going to the first week of Hogwarts, and the duo are going to cause some ripples.