ATTENTION READER!
This is PART 1 of a TWO PART chapter. It has been broken up for your viewing pleasure. ENJOY! :D
The Other Side of the Magic Coin
"Alright everyone! Here it comes!" Michael cheered.
A large crowd of Michael's friends were all clustered around the old Zenith television, watching the picture intently. Sitting on top of the television was an old clock ticking away, creeping ever closer to midnight. Stavish cracked a beer, and Alistair held a confetti popper at the ready.
"Three!"
"Two!"
"One!"
...
"HAPPY NEW YEAR!" Everyone cried.
~Should old acquaintance be forgot,
and never brought to mind?
Should old acquaintance be forgot,
for auld lang syne?
For auld lang syne, my dear,
for auld lang syne,
we'll take a cup of kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.
And surely you'll buy your pint stowe!
and surely I'll buy mine!
And we'll take a cup o' kindness yet,
for auld lang syne.~
Everyone sang together, and laughed when they forgot the rest of the words. It didn't matter, the tune was playing over the TV, so they could hum along. They drank beer and hugged each other, and welcomed the new year. A bright glowing 2019 could be seen on the TV. Alistair popped the confetti popper, and the confetti went everywhere. Everyone laughed when a big tangled wad of it ended up in Akia's hair.
...
Michael turned and hugged Sherry. Confetti gently fluttered off her slender shoulders. As the party cheered and celebrated, Michael smiled at Sherry.
"Happy new year." Michael said softly.
"Happy new year sweetie. I can't wait to see what this year brings us." Sherry said, smiling.
A pair of beers appeared between them, and they chuckled before rejoining the party.
...
..
.
~The Morning After~
.
..
...
"Ugh... hangover... happy new year..." Michael grumbled.
Michael groaned and rubbed his head. As usual, Sherry was cuddling tightly against his body, with her tits smushed up against his face. It was just the way a lewd succubus like her preferred to cuddle.
"Hmm... she's still asleep this time. That almost never happens. I guess I had better wiggle out of the succubus death grip and go find some pain pills." Michael thought.
So he carefully slid out of bed, and stuffed a pillow in Sherry's arms so she wouldn't wake up. Her arms were like proximity sensors, they alerted her if Michael slipped out of her grasp. He tip toed out of the bedroom, and closed the door behind him.
"Victory is mine anew! Now I just... uh..." Michael thought.
*blinkblinkblink
"What. The. Hell?" Michael thought.
He stared into the living room. Typically there was nothing on the section of brick wall opposite the bedroom hallway, other than Michael's desk. But all of a sudden... out of seemingly thin air... there was a new hallway. If one were to walk in the front door of the apartment, they could pass through the living room and then take either a left hand or right hand hallway. He could see more doors in that hallway, leading to new rooms. It looked as if someone had taken the neighboring apartment and turned it into an extension.
"Where the frack did that come from?" Michael thought.
He walked across the living room, and went down the new hallway. The very first door on the right was slightly ajar. Peeking inside, he could hear the sounds of video games. His desk had been moved into that room, and Akia was sitting at it.
"Good morning master." Akia said.
"Good morning. Where did this room come from?" Michael asked.
Akia paused her game and swiveled the desk chair around.
"Master, would you like the short or long explanation?" Akia asked.
"Let's start with the short explanation." Michael said.
"Entity Searraigh added the rooms last night. She used magic to rearrange the walls and install new fixtures." Akia said.
...
"Okay, let's try the long version." Michael said dryly.
"I observed an interesting phenomenon last night, after you and everyone at the party consumed a sizable quantity of alcoholic beverages." Akia started.
"Yeah we were pretty drunk." Michael chuckled.
"Your behavior became even more erratic than usual." Akia said.
"I bet you enjoyed that, seeing as how you're interested in human irrationality." Michael reasoned.
"That is correct master. However, Searraigh was the most irrational of all. She kept insisting that the apartment was too small, and she started to expand it. When I asked her why she was creating so many rooms, she provided no appropriate answer." Akia recounted.
"What answer did she give?" Michael asked.
"She giggled." Akia recalled.
Michael facepalmed.
"What's that darned succubus up to?" Michael thought.
...
"What about the people who lived here in this apartment?" Michael asked.
"Entity Searraigh said they moved out a long time ago." Akia said.
"Oh. Okay I guess. I didn't ever really talk to them much." Michael said quietly.
...
"So which room is yours?" Michael asked.
"None. I do not require a dedicated room." Akia said.
"Aww, you sure about that? Wouldn't it be nice to have somewhere that's private?" Michael asked.
"I only require a place in which to be repaired, and to keep spare clothing." Akia said.
Michael rubbed his chin.
"Well... I assume this room is intended to be my work area? I'm responsible for your repairs, so this is where I'd be repairing you. And you can have that closet over there for your clothes." Michael reasoned.
"We have come to a consensus." Akia said.
And with that, she returned to playing her videogames. Michael walked up behind her and studied the screen.
"Nier Automata?" Michael questioned.
"Yes master. I found it in your Steam library." Akia said.
"He...hehe...hehehehehehehe~" Michael chuckled.
He patted her shoulder, shook his head, and turned to leave.
"I'll leave you to it then. Have fun~" Michael said cheerfully.
"Thank you master. Glory to Mankind!" Akia said.
Michael just about died laughing as he made his way out of the lab.
...
A quick inspection of the new addon revealed several empty bedrooms, a new bathroom, and a full blown laundry room. The laundry room stuck out to Michael the most, since most apartments in his area didn't have their own laundry rooms. Michael detested public Laundromats, so he had been using a small portable twin tub which he simply lifted in and out of his bathtub when he needed it. It worked when he lived on his own, but it quickly became inadequate with three people.
...
He wandered back out into the hallway, and focused his attention on the walls and floors. If he hadn't have known better, the two apartments looked like they had always been part of each other. Sherry's remodeling was completely seamless. Even the carpet matched up. The walls and floors looked perfect, with even the drywall spackling lining up. Somehow, while drunk, Sherry had managed to remodel better than a professional could have done.
"I guess that's the power of magic." Michael thought.
...
Michael went into the kitchen to throw some coffee on the stove. He filled his coffee pot from his Big Berkey water filter, and then threw in a measured amount of coffee on top. When he went to start the gas stove, his fingers got a nasty shock from the knob.
*POP
"Ow! Damn it." Michael exclaimed.
He figured it was a static discharge from walking around barefoot on the carpet earlier, so he went in a second time.
*POP!
"Damn it! What the hell! I want my damn coffee!" Michael exclaimed.
He forced it, zapped the hell out of himself, and started the burner by sheer will. Already he knew his morning wasn't starting out well.
...
Sherry still wasn't awake by then, so Michael decided to try scrambling up some breakfast. When he reached for the cabinet with the frying pan, he was in for quite the surprise.
*WHACK
Michael reeled when the cabinet door opened by itself and nailed him right in the forehead. The blow was hard enough that it made him sink to the ground while spouting a nonstop stream of purple cusses.
"What in the blazes is going on out here?!" Sherry exclaimed.
She had been awoken by the noise, and came hurrying angrily out of the bedroom. Waking up and finding a pillow instead of her man in her arms instantly put her in a bad mood. But finding Michael in her kitchen, doing things on her stove, playing with her food, was just too much.
"GEEEEET OOUUUUUT OF MY KIIIIITCHEEEEN!" Sherry screeched.
Michael scrambled to get out of the kitchen. Between the hangover and the whack to the skull, his head was pulsating in pain.
"I just wanted some food so the ibuprofen doesn't burn a hole in my stomach!" Michael thought.
He went for the new hallway, and disappeared into one of the new rooms. Sherry grumbled to herself, and was about to start breakfast when she heard a loud YELP come from an empty bedroom.
"Sweetie?" Sherry questioned.
Akia also heard the noise, and she appeared at the doorway to the lab. The two concerned women hurried down the hall and into the same room that they heard the sound. What they found was an empty room... and a huge hole in the floor.
*Gloop
*Glorp
*POP
A bubbling tar pit of demonic energy oozed and flowed in the hole. Michael had fallen through the floor, and straight into a huge stockpile of Sherry's reserve mana.
"Sweetie! Come to the sound of my voice!" Sherry called.
"Master! Swim master! You can swim, right?" Akia called.
Sherry stuck her arm into the good, and swished it around in search of something to grab.
"I can't find him!" Sherry exclaimed.
"Will he drown?" Akia asked.
"No, but there's no telling what all this demonic energy will do to him! It's extra concentrated!" Sherry fretted.
*FWOOSH!
Suddenly the demonic energy pool began lowering, as if someone had pulled a drain plug in a bath tub. It lowered and lowered, until they could see the carpet of the apartment one floor down.
*Knockknockknock
Someone knocked on the front door of their apartment. Akia and Sherry looked at each other, and then turned in unison to go answer it.
...
When they opened the front door, they were shocked to discover a very beautiful and tall succubus wearing ill fitting men's clothes. Behind her was a huge lake of demonic energy spreading out into the street.
"I fell through the floor, and I had to go through the front door to escape." The succubus explained.
Akia and Sherry stared at her with wide eyes.
"What? You gonna just stare at me, or are you going to do something about that demonic energy?" The succubus asked, jacking her thumb over her shoulder.
"Is that... you sweetie?" Sherry hesitated.
"Who the frack do you think it is!?" The succubus shot.
She covered her mouth and coughed a few times.
"I think I got some of that shit in my lungs. I lost my voice." The succubus said.
"I think you lost something more than just your voice." Sherry said softly.
Her eyes trailed downwards.
...
..
.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!" The succubus screamed.
"Stay calm sweetie! It's just a temporary side effect of demonic energy overdose!" Sherry exclaimed.
"It turned me into a woman! How the frack am I supposed to stay calm?!" The succubus exclaimed.
Sherry grabbed the newly born woman and dragged her into the apartment, and slammed the door behind her. Within moments, she was seated on the couch. During that whole encounter, Akia had remained absolutely silent. She looked just about ready to have a blue screen of death from how overloaded her CPU was.
"Turn me back!" The succubus exclaimed.
"I can't! Remember when I warned you what too much demonic energy would do to a man? Well... I didn't jest!" Sherry explained.
"So I'm stuck like this!?" The succubus asked, voice warbling.
"Hardly. Your male soul is quickly rejecting what your body has become. I don't expect this to last longer than a day or two. At most." Sherry said.
The woman sighed in relief, and sank back into the couch.
"Until that moment comes, I shall call you by a new name. It seems wrong to call you Michael, when you don't look like a Michael." Sherry said.
...
"Michelle?" Sherry suggested.
"Ugh." The succubus dismissed.
"How about Ellie? That's a cuter way of saying Michelle." Sherry suggested.
"You know... that is pretty cute~ Okay~" Ellie agreed.
The next thing Sherry knew, Ellie stripped off her own clothes and began groping herself.
"If I'm stuck like this, I might as well have some fun~" Ellie explained.
"You're certainly taking this in stride." Sherry said.
"You said it wasn't permanent. So I don't need to worry." Ellie said.
*Tweak
"Ohh, women have sensitive nipples~" Ellie moaned.
...
Ellie's crimson succubus eyes suddenly latched onto Akia, and she smiled seductively.
"Hello there Akia~" Ellie purred.
*Glomp!
She was all over Akia in an instant, slipping her slender fingers under Akia's shirt and tweaking her nipples. Akia tried pulling away while Ellie planted countless wet kisses on her face. Several landed directly on her lips.
"Master! You are malfunctioning!" Akia exclaimed.
"I'm not malfunctioning, I want to screw~" Ellie purred.
Akia forcefully pushed the former man away.
"I do not believe you would act this way normally master! My sensors indicate your central processor has undergone significant changes!" Akia said.
...
Ellie sobbed.
"I just wanted to be loved..." Ellie choked.
"I love you sweetie!" Sherry interjected.
"Yay!" Ellie cheered.
Ellie let Akia go and turned her attention on Sherry. They hugged, and it didn't take more than a few seconds before they were groping each other's breasts and asses. Akia simply walked out of the room, refusing to take part in what was about to happen.
...
Ellie reached around and grabbed Sherry's tail, and sensually rubbed her fingers along the tip. It caused Sherry's eyes to roll back into her head.
"Ohhhh...~ What a wonderful little minx I've created~" Sherry purred.
*Smooch
*Smoochsmooch
"Maybe I'll keep you like this for a while. It'd be fun~" Sherry cooed.
*Smooch
*Pwah
"Oh sweetie, the new you is so wonderful~" Sherry moaned.
*Smooch
*Smack
"You don't know the half of it~" Ellie purred.
Ellie slid her hand between Sherry's legs, and plunged a finger deep into her wet folds.
"Oh yeah, moan for me. Good girl~" Ellie praised.
"I love it when you say that!" Sherry panted.
"You mean good girl? It's easy to say, you are a good girl. And good girls squirt when their button gets pressed." Ellie said.
"AAAAAAAaaaaahhhhhh~" Sherry screamed in pleasure.
Sherry sank into the couch as her rapid onset orgasm washed over her body. Ellie leaned in and whispered in her ear.
"Now it's your turn. I want to feel good too." Ellie whispered.
...
~Several Hours Later~
...
The two women panted as they held each other with their arms. Ellie, having found new levels of stamina from becoming a succubus, had given Sherry a run for her money. Sherry in turn had shown Ellie all sorts of things she didn't know about the female body.
"That was fun. Now... I think we should have a new kind of fun." Ellie whispered.
"What... do you... have... in mind?" Sherry panted.
Sherry sensually groped Ellie's body as she anxiously waited for her words.
"Oh... nothing major. Just the possibility of corrupting millions of boring humans into mamono." Ellie teased.
Sherry snapped out of her pink haze, and grabbed the newly born woman by her slender shoulders.
"What have you been hiding? Tell me! I want to corrupt this world faster!" Sherry exclaimed.
Ellie giggled, and sensually licked her lips.
"I'll show you~" Ellie hummed.
...
..
~Shortly Later~
..
...
"Welcome to the Hershey's Chocolate factory." Ellie said.
Sherry looked with wide eyes at the huge facility.
"They make chocolate in there? It's massive!" Sherry remarked.
"Don't drool. It's not lady like." Ellie teased.
Sherry was a prime example of the female stereotype. She absolutely adored chocolate. It wasn't a stereotype without a grain of truth.
"According to statistics, Ninety one percent of women liked to eat chocolate, compared to eighty seven percent of men. That meant ninety one percent of the female population of the United States all had a common source of food." Ellie explained.
Ellie continued to explain her idea. If Searraigh were to sneak into that factory undetected, and contaminate the chocolate with demonic energy, then there was an extremely high chance that nearly the entire female population would unknowingly consume the very substance that would turn them into inma. It would end up in thousands of products spread across the country. Nobody would be able to so much as have a chocolate chip cookie without getting a little dose.
"Think about it. Chocolate is normally dark. Demonic energy is dark. They'll never know. And if we contaminate the supplies right now, then when Valentine's day rolls around next month, millions of dollars worth of chocolate will be primed to heat up the holiday like never before." Ellie suggested.
"Good work Micha... ahem...sweetie." Sherry cleared her throat.
"I'm not Michael. I'm Ellie. He would never have brought you here." Ellie said.
Sherry shot Ellie a worried look, but remained silent.
...
Ellie stood up and began walking towards the factory, and Sherry quickly hurried after her.
"Wait dear! Are you going to just march in there like that?" Sherry asked.
"Like what?" Ellie asked.
"Naked." Sherry said.
...
Ellie looked down at herself, and was granted a view of her bare naked breasts and tight pussy.
"Ehh. I don't really care. But... maybe it'd be better if you made us invisible. It would be better if they don't know, so they don't recall the chocolate." Ellie said.
"As you wish." Sherry said.
...
..
.
~Later~
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..
...
The feminine duo came running out of the factory with big smiles on their faces. Ducking behind some cars, they rendered themselves visible again.
"Mission accomplished, and nobody triggered any alarms! Lambert would be proud!" Ellie said.
"Who?" Sherry asked.
"Nevermind. You'd better teleport us out of here. Then we can take a sexy shower together!" Ellie suggested.
Sherry's eyes lit up like never before. She couldn't possibly cast the teleportation spell fast enough. Within fifteen seconds, the two of them were back in the apartment, in the shower under a stream of water, making out like their lives depended on it.
...
~Hours Later~
...
"Akiiiiiaaaa~" Ellie called cutely.
Akia was sitting at the computer desk in Michael's new lab, when she heard her transformed master calling her. She swiveled around in the chair, and placed her hands in her lap while Ellie sashayed into the lab. Ellie was wearing Nier Automata cosplay.
"Look Akia, I bought a couple of outfits! We can dress up together!" Ellie said cheerfully.
Akia remained silent. Ellie's smile faded.
"Do you... hate me now that I look like this?" Ellie asked.
"No." Akia said.
Ellie smiled, and decided to plop right in Akia's lap.
*Smooch~
She planted a kiss right on Akia's lips, which made the automaton turn her head.
"What's the matter? You sure seemed to enjoy kissing me during your authentication registration." Ellie said seductively.
She sensually fondled Akia's body as she spoke.
"You are not master." Akia said.
"I'm a better version of him. I'll tell you I love you, when he never would admit it. I'm nicer too, he's such a grump!" Ellie countered.
Ellie's hand went between Akia's legs.
"I do not like this activity. Please stop." Akia said.
Ellie paused.
...
Her hand slowly withdrew from between Akia's thighs. Even after temporarily turning into a succubus, she still had enough of her mind left to not want to hurt Akia. If she said she didn't want to go there, she wasn't going to go there. Ellie wasn't about to molest her.
"I'm sorry... I thought..." Ellie hesitated.
"You are not authorized to perform that activity." Akia said, businesslike.
...
..
*Sniffle
"Fine! You want your boring old master back, you can have him! I'll be gone forever in a few hours anyways!" Ellie choked.
She ran out of the room crying. Akia hesitated a moment, then hopped up to follow Ellie. It was too late, Sherry was already consoling her in the living room. Of course that meant that Sherry inevitably lead Ellie straight to the bedroom, which is exactly what Ellie wanted in the first place. They wound up stripping each other's clothes off, and they flopped onto the bed in a tangle of succubus wings and tails.
...
~Later That Night~
...
"Oh... oh yeah... your tongue is perfect... I love it~" Sherry moaned.
She was sitting on the bed with Ellie's head between her legs, getting the best oral of her life. Her head was arched back, her eyes were clamped shut, and she was moaning uncontrollably.
"Ellie! It's coming! I'm almost there! Ellie! ELLLIE!" Sherry squealed.
Then all of a sudden... it stopped.
"My name isn't Ellie." Michael said dryly.
Sherry's eyes widened, and she shot up to the sitting position. There was Michael between her legs, with a face covered in lady cum.
"Wh...when? How? Oh who cares, don't leave me like this! I'm right there!" Sherry exclaimed.
He hesitated for several long seconds, then went right back to eating her out. She moaned and collapsed backwards.
"Yes! YES! YES OH MAOYU! CUMMMMMIIIIINGGGG!" Sherry screamed.
And that was the brief but exciting existence of Ellie. Having spent ninety percent of her time on earth screwing around, all she managed to accomplish was to leave a bad taste in Michael's mouth.
...
..
.
"Ugh... I'm going to take a shower." Michael said, disgusted.
Michael shuffled out of the bedroom, leaving Sherry panting on the bed. As it so happened, Akia heard the doors opening and closing as he crossed the hallway into the bathroom, so she hopped up and left the lab. She saw Sherry follow him into the bathroom.
"Let's take a shower together!" Sherry said cheerfully.
Akia couldn't quite make out what Michael's response was.
"That's silly! It was an accident... er... sweetie? Are you well?" Sherry asked, uncertain.
Akia rounded the corner just at the perfect time.
*BLEEEGH!
Michael threw up all over Sherry, causing her to let out a frightened scream. The shower curtain got ripped down in the wild flailing of arms.
"AHHHH! IT'S IN MY MOUTH!" Sherry screamed.
*BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGH!
He threw up again, splattering all over her. What came out wasn't bile, rather it was a disgusting mixture of chocolate, lady cum, and demonic energy. He projectile vomited enough to cover her in a sticky black goo from head to toe. She ran screaming out of the bathroom, narrowly missing Akia along the way. Michael collapsed in the shower, and the shower curtain rod collapsed down with him.
...
Akia formed a very faint smile.
"I spit my last breath at thee." Akia thought.
She put the toilet seat down, and sat on it. Then she reached into the shower and gently patted Michael's back.
*BLEEEEGH!
That time it flew harmlessly into the tub. Akia continued to soothingly rub his back.
"Let it out. You're okay master." Akia said softly.
*BLEEEEGHcoughcoughcough
"Ahhh hell..." Michael groaned.
*Coughhackcough
"That wasn't me. That was the demonic energy doing the talking. Ellie wasn't real." Michael murmured.
"I know master. I'm still sorry I made you cry." Akia said softly.
...
*BLEEEGH!
...
..
.
A little time passed, and Michael wound up back in bed. He didn't feel very well at all, and Akia tucked him in. At one point or another, Sherry wandered into the bedroom. She had cleaned herself off and gargled a bunch of water to rinse out her mouth. When she crawled into the bed, Michael rolled over and presented his back. Akia left the room to give them privacy.
"So you're giving me your back now? I did nothing to deserve this. I said it was an accident." Sherry insisted.
"I know. You know what you didn't say?" Michael asked, muffled.
"What?" Sherry asked.
"You didn't say sorry." Michael said, muffled.
"I uh... sorry?" Sherry said meekly.
"And another thing. If I had been Ellie for much longer, I would have forgotten all about Michael Collins." Michael said.
And with that, he went to sleep.
...
..
.
~The Next Morning~
.
..
...
Michael found himself sitting at the kitchen island, eating breakfast and sipping coffee as if it were a completely normal day. Sherry was on the other side of the island, throwing the dishes into the sink and scrubbing them spotless.
"So did breakfast help at all, or are you still feeling unwell?" Sherry asked.
"I'm still a little queasy, but this helped. Thanks." Michael said.
"Of course sweetie, it's my pleasure." Sherry said.
...
"I shouldn't have given you the cold shoulder last night." Michael said softly.
"Don't apologize. I know you weren't feeling well, and you just wanted to be left alone. And it was my mistake for not warding the floors properly. That demonic energy ate right up from the bottom floor." Sherry explained.
"Why were you keeping a pool of demonic energy in the lower neighbor's apartment anyways?" Michael asked.
"It seemed like the thing to do. She moved out ages ago. I have to keep my extra demonic energy somewhere." Sherry said.
Michael nodded and took a sip of his coffee.
"So... how about that cabinet?" Michael asked.
"Hmm? What about the cabinets?" Sherry asked.
"Why'd it clock me in the head?" Michael asked.
"OOOOOoooooohhhh! It's because I put a curse on the kitchen. If anyone other than myself or anyone I've given permission tries to cook something here, they will be doomed to curdled milk, wilted lettuce, and burned meat." Sherry said.
...
"That said, I never intended for you to wilt like lettuce after being struck in the head." Sherry quipped.
"Hahahaha!" Michael laughed loudly.
"So make me a happy woman... and stay out of my kitchen please." Sherry said pointedly.
"Alright alright." Michael countered, chuckling.
...
..
.
So their morning continued more or less normally. After eating breakfast and drinking a bunch of coffee, Sherry gave him the dime tour of the new apartment additions. Michael had already seen all of it, but Sherry seemed so proud of all her hard work. He had to at least let her brag some. And he did smile and compliment her work, even if the hole in the floor was less than thrilling.
"Now we have all these extra rooms, and an extra bathroom too! We can do all sorts of things, like have guests over and have extra storage!" Sherry said excitedly.
"I'd like to have guests. And it gets my computer desk out of the living room. We do technically own the building, we can do whatever we want." Michael reasoned.
...
"And little does he know, this is merely another step towards my plans to drown him in women." Sherry thought, grinning evilly.
...
"So what's on the agenda for today?" Sherry asked.
"Well... I'd like to try to hunt down some replacement back glass for the Duster. Then I'd like to make sure Fort Chell has plenty of supplies for the troops. Then I want to get caught up on the news." Michael said.
"Very well sweetie." Sherry said, nodding.
"I also want to find the time to make a scabbard for your sword." Michael added.
Sherry's eyes twinkled.
"Oh sweetie... I would appreciate that~" Sherry said happily.
"Time for me to get to work." Michael said.
...
..
.
So that's exactly what Michael did. First he went looking for rear glass for his Duster. Akia ended up being incredibly helpful for that, because she was able to use her blaster to heat and melt a piece of glass from an entirely different model of car, and mold it into the shape needed for the Duster. Her machine precision made it look so good that it was indistinguishable from a factory piece of glass. Such an idea wouldn't have worked for a windshield thanks to the safety glass, but it worked for the back glass just fine. It was a good thing they got it done when they did, because it began to rain shortly after they finished.
...
The next thing to handle was supplies. Michael and Sherry teleported to just about every gun shop in Arizona, buying up as much ammo as they could find for the defenders of Fort Chell. They also sent the word out to the community to gather up as much food, medical, and fuel supplies they could, and send it straight through the portal. The soldiers there were very grateful, especially when beer showed up. Michael and Sherry cut an unbelievable number of checks for all the supplies.
...
They continued their shopping spree, which consumed the rest of the day. More clothes were purchased for Akia, a big worktable was purchased for Michael's new lab, and Michael himself managed to pick out some supplies for Sherry's scabbard.
...
..
.
~Later~
.
..
...
The lab was transformed into a crazy madhouse where all sorts of wild things were happening. Since it was the biggest of all the new rooms attached to the apartment, there was plenty of space for rows and rows of signal generators, oscilloscopes, spectrum analyzers, work benches, soldering stations, desoldering stations, the computer desk, shelves for projects, gunsmithing tools, reloading equipment, and anything else that interested Michael. There was even a 3d printer whirring away in one corner, attached to an old Lenovo Thinkpad he had in his tech stash. In another corner of the room, a homebrew hifi setup made the lab windows rattle. One of the first things he played on it was Ram Jam 'Black Betty'.
"~Whoa Black Betty, bam a lam~" Michael sang along.
Sherry entered that room, her eyes as wide as saucers at what Michael had done to the place.
"He really is EXACTLY like an insane wizard tinkering in a mage's tower!" Sherry thought.
Her favorite thing to stare at for minutes at a time was the 3d printer. Watching something be created line by line from nothing was so utterly fascinating to her. And then she stared at the oscilloscope in fascination. The glowing green phosphors and sine waves were captivating. Even if it was something simple for Michael, it impressed Sherry. She didn't understand a single thing he was doing in there, but she was amazed by all of it.
...
Sherry was pretty busy as well. While she would come into the lab and look around on occasion, she found it too noisy for her tastes. She preferred the quiet of her own kitchen, where she could work on her own projects. Of course calling it a kitchen was a stretch, because it wasn't just food she made there. Some of her experiments involved potions, which of course she would taste test.
"A little powdered energized quartz, a dash of air essence, and the power of my magic..." Sherry said.
*POOF!
"Haha! The recipe was a success!" Sherry exclaimed.
She raised a glass of nondescript clear liquid, and took a taste. As the liquid touched her mouth, went down her throat, and settled into her stomach, it reacted powerfully and unleashed its full effects. Her mouth began to water, her throat tingled, and her stomach was filled with warmth. It was a powerful love potion, something that Sherry didn't have a ton of experience making.
"It seems to work. Now to take a larger dose." Sherry murmured.
*GULP
Sherry gasped, and sank to the floor.
"Oh! Ohhhhhhhh!" Sherry moaned.
...
With Sherry in the kitchen schliking herself to death, Michael was free to work undisturbed. He was able to make an incredible breakthrough with Akia.
"You... have a self repair feature?" Michael asked
"Yes master. However, it is currently inoperable." Akia said.
"How does it work?" Michael asked.
"Once the system is functioning properly, trillions of picobots will flow through my circuits and repair any damage. Should the picobots require raw materials to conduct the repair, a data packet will be sent to my central processing unit." Akia explained.
"Picobots? Not nanobots?" Michael asked.
"Nanobots were the previous generation of repair mechanism. They proved to be too large." Akia explained.
Michael coughed and sneezed at the same time.
"Too large." Michael scoffed.
"Yes master. All existing automaton units were upgraded to the picobots, and the nanobots were put on special diets so they would lose weight." Akia quipped.
Michael snickered.
"Okay, in all seriousness... what do I need to do to activate this repair system of yours?" Michael asked.
Akia pulled her shirt off, prompting Michael to look away.
"I will open my chassis access panels so you may inspect the system for obvious damage. I suspect you will find some from how... crudely... I was disassembled by the gremlins." Akia said.
...
"Master, your eyes are required for the inspection." Akia said.
"Are you wearing a bra?" Michael asked.
*Shuffling
*Doorclick
...
"I am now." Akia said.
He carefully glanced back, and noticed Akia was wearing a sports bra. Sighing in relief, he started pulling out some of his tools. Moments later Akia laid down on the workbench, and let Michael inspect her circuitry.
"Please trace circuit a2 to 2b." Akia said, nonchalant.
"A2 to 2... wait a minute, I know what you did there." Michael said, smiling.
"Yes master." Akia said, smiling faintly.
...
"Please trace circuit a3 to 2d." Akia said.
"Done. It's intact." Michael said.
"Please trace circuit 4a to d1." Akia said.
...
..
"Hmm... it's open. Wow, did we just get that lucky?" Michael asked.
"Possibly master. Please inspect this circuit and find the open." Akia said.
So Michael spent the next hour peering closely at Akia's defective circuit. He used all sorts of magnifying glasses, handheld microscopes, and moved his illumination all over to try to spot the problem. Eventually he found a component roughly the size of a human hair that didn't seem to be attached anymore.
"I think I found it. The break seems to be right in the middle of this trace. If I can even call it a trace. Or if this could be called a circuit board." Michael said.
"If you temporarily reconnect the broken connection, my self repair picobots will be able to repair it permanently." Akia suggested.
"Okay, so if I press the break down with a fine tipped needle..." Michael reasoned.
He carefully reached in and pressed the broken connection down so it would make contact. In the view of the microscope, his 'fine tipped needle' looked about as fine tipped as a D6 bulldozer.
"Please stand by. Self repair mechanism is online. Transmitting. Recieving. Picobots deployed." Akia said.
Several tense moments passed.
"I don't know how much longer I can hold this steady." Michael said.
"Picobots have reported a successful repair. You may now retract the tool." Akia said.
Just then, Michael felt a tiny pin prick in the finger holding the needle. It felt just like getting bit by an insect. He yanked his arm free, and inspected his finger.
"Tool removed." Akia said casually.
"It felt like something just bit me!" Michael exclaimed.
"The picobots detected a foreign object inside my chassis. They are programmed to dissolve foreign objects and use them for raw materials." Akia explained.
Michael noticed the fine tipped needle was dissolving on Akia's stomach, and the particles were moving inside her chassis.
"That's pretty cool. Okay Akia, run some self diagnostics and see if there's anything you can sick the little guys on to repair." Michael instructed.
"Yes master. Thank you for repairing me. I hope you can repair me again at a later date." Akia said.
"Hehe, sounds like you don't need it anymore, with those little borg nanites running around inside you. Of course I'm always happy to help." Michael said.
And with that, Akia's chassis access panels were closed up, and Michael turned to other projects. Meanwhile Akia sat at the computer desk, playing video games while conducting several internal scans for needed repairs. Also, a simulation ran in the back processes of her cpu, considering the possibility of picobots functioning inside organic lifeforms. Michael's quip about the borg nanites gave her the idea.
...
..
~Much Later~
..
...
Michael peeked out from the lab, and saw Sherry in the kitchen. She saw him, and she flashed him a pearly white smile.
"Don't worry, I haven't drank any more tonics. I'm calm." Sherry said.
Michael sighed in relief, and walked out of the lab.
"I made your sword sheath." Michael said.
Sure enough, he had a sheath for a longsword in his hands. She came closer, her eyes wide.
"It's... it's beautiful!" Sherry remarked in awe.
"I thought since we're living in Arizona, I'd do it Apache style with a little Mexican flair." Michael said.
Sherry carefully rubbed her thumb over the genuine deer hide leatherwork, which Michael had carefully embossed and colored with square patterns and diamond shapes in reds, yellows, and blues. The dye looked muted, so it wouldn't stand out too much in the wild, but it still offered color to an otherwise drab sheath.
"It's a blend of traditional and modern. On the outside it looks like something an Apache brave might have carried their tomahawk in, but on the inside you have the benefits of a Kydex sheath. It won't ever swell or wear out like wood." Michael said.
She pulled on her sword, and it came out with a faint click. When it went back inside, it quietly clicked into place. Her eyes went down towards the end of the sheath, which bore a metal tip.
"What kind of metal is this at the tip here?" Sherry asked.
"That is titanium, a kind of metal I don't think exists in your world yet. I thought it would be novel walking around knowing you're the only person on the planet that possesses titanium." Michael said.
"Oh my! Was it terribly expensive?" Sherry asked.
"It wasn't too bad. Titanium isn't as expensive as it used to be. Gold is way worse." Michael said.
Sherry turned her attention to the shoulder strap, which was braided leather. Her eyes were filled with joy at her new accessory.
"So, what do you think? Will it work?" Michael asked.
"Absolutely! I love it sweetie! Thank you so very much!" Sherry exclaimed.
She kissed him lovingly, and then secured her sword over her shoulder where it belonged.
"Now why don't you show me your best overhand slash from a dead draw?" Michael suggested.
"I can certainly do that!" Sherry said cheerfully.
Michael backed away, and Sherry picked a safe direction to swing. Her arm went limp at her side, and she took a deep breath.
"YAH!" Sherry cried.
Her arm shot up, grabbed the hilt of the sword, and drew while slashing diagonally through an imaginary torso. She put so much force into the swing that the magic sword activated and lashed out with a non corporeal blade edge, which blasted through the wall and living room sofa. Akia was on the other side, and she jumped in surprise. The 3D printer wheezed to a pitiful stop, and fell apart into two perfectly sliced pieces. A cloud of dust spread across the room from the collapsing brick and drywall.
"EEP! I overdid it!" Sherry exclaimed.
"That seems to be a theme we're running into lately." Michael said dryly.
"Wait! I can fix this! Ehh... I need a moment!" Sherry panicked.
She raised her hands and used magic to undo the damage. The bricks flew through the air and melded back together, and the drywall reformed into something resembling a wall again.
...
~Later~
...
"And all told, the only permanent damage is one failed 3d print. The rest of the apartment is back to normal." Michael said.
He took the half completed 3d print and threw it in the trash. There was no way to save it.
"I notice you didn't become angry over my accident." Sherry observed.
"That's because I figured you could fix it like Tohru in Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid." Michael quipped.
Akia opened her mouth to ask a question, but Michael beat her to the punch.
"You'll find it under D:/Storage/For Fun/Videos/Anime/DragonMaid." Michael said.
"Thank you master." Akia said.
She turned towards Michael's computer, navigated the indicated folders, and started watching the anime in question.
...
So Michael and Sherry wound up out in the living room again, back where they had started. Sherry fingered the sheath on her back, and used magic to make it fade from sight.
"Chu chu yeah!" Akia cheered from the other room.
"Hehehehe~ That girl, I swear..." Michael chuckled.
"Yes?" Sherry questioned.
"She puts me in a good mood." Michael explained.
"Ah, I see. And what about me?" Sherry asked.
"You have your moments too. Not going to lie, it was pretty funny seeing you chop the apartment in half." Michael said.
She hesitated for a moment, and then nodded in agreement.
"Yes that was quite amusing~" Sherry agreed.
...
"You worked so hard to make this sheath for me, so... I have something I wish to give you." Sherry said.
"A kiss?" Michael asked.
"That too, but I have something else in mind. Sit right down here in your chair, and I'll get it." Sherry said.
"Okay~" Michael said cheerfully.
So he sat in his old faithful chair, and waited as Sherry disappeared into the master bedroom. When she returned, she paused right at the corner of the hallway with her arms hidden behind her back.
"Close your eyes." Sherry said.
Michael's eyes fluttered shut. He could hear Sherry as she walked closer, and he could hear the sound of something being unwrapped from paper.
"And... now! Open your eyes!" Sherry cheered.
...
Sherry was holding a big leather bomber jacket. It had a wool collar, just like a bomber aviator might have had in World War Two, but with a modern twist. It had elastic cuffs, and an elastic waist. It looked really sharp, and very warm. Michael took it, and felt it with his fingers. It was real leather, not pleather.
"Wow! This thing is AWESOME!" Michael exclaimed.
"It's winter, and you were cold, so I thought a good warm coat would please you. Stavish suggested this style." Sherry explained.
"Ever since I've lost a bunch of weight, I noticed I get cold a lot easier. I guess I don't have so much insulation anymore." Michael chuckled.
"No you don't. So make sure you wear plenty so you don't get chilled." Sherry said.
He slid forward on the chair to give himself room, and he pulled the jacket on. Sherry's eyes lit up.
"Oh my goodness! I thought you would look good, but that's incredible! You look so sexy!" Sherry exclaimed in awe.
"Thanks." Michael said.
...
"Where'd you get it? It's really nice." Michael asked.
"There's a tailor in Lescatie that I've done business with before. It's an arachne with an ittan momen assistant. I showed her a few fairths that Stavish gave me, and she imitated it." Sherry explained.
"Er..." Michael hesitated.
"What a pleasant woman. She said she met you once, and remembered your measurements. Why didn't you tell me you went to a tailor in Lescatie?" Sherry asked.
"Well I wasn't exactly there to get clothes." Michael said evasively.
"Oh. I see. It's not a problem. I made a deal with her that all of our clothes will come from her shop from now on. No wait list. It seemed she was excited to make clothes for the great Lord Collins." Sherry said, smiling.
Michael groaned internally. The last thing he wanted to do was bother with that damned arachne and her grubby uniform stealing hands.
"So what did she want in exchange?" Michael asked.
"She wanted me to set up a supply of fabric from this world to her shop. I talked to that danuki trader at the theater, and she was more than happy to do it." Sherry explained.
"Aha... and now everything makes perfect sense." Michael thought.
"We should head over to the theater and make sure those supplies we bought are getting where they need to go." Michael suggested.
"Perhaps we'll let Akia enjoy whatever she's doing for a while, then we'll leave." Sherry suggested.
"Agreed." Michael said.
...
~Later~
...
Michael, Sherry, and Akia drove over to the theater on 5th and B, to check up on whether their supplies were showing up or not. When they parked the Duster and walked inside, several people waved at them. They passed the danuki trader, who was very busy with all sorts of customers buying the new and exotic goods she had brought from the other side of the portal.
"Hey, looks like business is pretty good." Michael said, smiling.
"It is sir! I can't thank you enough for renting this space to me! People from your world can't get enough of my goods! I'll be rolling in coin by the time I find a husband!" The danuki trader said happily.
"Well I wish you luck on your search. Say, mind if I take a few..." Michael started.
She offered him a basket full of prisoner fruits.
"Thanks~" Michael said cheerfully.
"Would you like some mistress Searraigh?" The danuki trader asked.
"No thank you." Sherry said.
So Michael went onward while munching on those delicious creamy fruits. Sherry snagged one for herself along the way, and giggled at the look on Michael's face when he caught her thievery.
"I swear, women are all the same. You could have gotten your own, but you steal mine instead." Michael grumbled.
"Guilty as charged~" Sherry giggled.
...
Before long they found Specialist Stavish helping direct forklifts, which were hauling pallets of supplies and ammo through the portal. She snapped to attention as soon as Michael showed up.
"I'm a civilian Stavish. Lose the salute." Michael said dryly.
"Yes sir, sorry sir." Stavish said.
"So what's the news? You guys need any other supplies? Can we help with anything?" Michael asked.
"Actually there is one thing sir. And I'm not exactly... excited to ask this. When are we getting paid?" Stavish asked reluctantly.
"You haven't been getting a paycheck!?" Michael asked, surprised.
"Well... I got one check, but nobody else got anything." Stavish said.
"Figure out how much we owe you in back pay, and I'll make sure it's paid plus five percent interest." Michael said.
"Yes sir! Thank you sir!" Stavish said enthusiastically.
"We'll sort out this horrid error, on my word of honor as Druella's dark knight. I'll call up the danuki banker and..." Sherry vowed.
...
As Sherry spoke with Stavish, Michael's eyes drifted off in a different direction. They were standing near the front of the theater, near the big bay windows that made up the reception area outside the actual theater room. Michael happened to look out of the window at just the right moment, and the sun happened to be in just the right spot, that he saw a particular muted glint in a building window across the street. It was a sort of reddish blue glint that was all too familiar for a marksman like Michael. As it so happened, Akia noticed it too.
"Master, there is a..." Akia tried to warn.
"SNIPER!" Michael barked.
He shoved Sherry to the ground, and every single infantryman in that room instantly dropped. Their years of experience and training made the action pure instinct. When they all dropped, Akia and half the civilians also dropped. The danuki trader took cover behind her consession stand.
*CRACK!
*ZIP!
If he had been an instant slower, Sherry's head would have been blown off. The bullet zipped through the window, missed her head by a half an inch, and buried in the floor to her right. Within moments, the radio on Stavish's web gear was alight with all sorts of chaotic radio traffic. Akia deployed her blaster.
"Where's the shooter!? Did you see?!" Stavish demanded.
"Mission style office building, third floor, second window from the left!" Michael recounted.
Stavish immediately relayed the information. As soon as those words were out on the airways, a dozen pairs of eyes and a dozen rifles all zeroed in on that window.
*BRAAAT
*POPPOPPOP
*BANGBANGBANG
*Pew!
Akia put a blast in for good measure, and vaporized a large section of the building.
...
Then silence. Michael tucked Sherry in close to the window sill so nobody outside could see her. Stavish was glued to the radio.
"Can anyone confirm a target down?" Stavish asked over the radio.
"Negative headless horseman. I've got glass on that window, I don't see a body." The radio hissed.
"He moved." Michael interjected.
Sherry tried getting up, but Michael shoved her face first into the carpet.
"You STAY DOWN!" Michael barked.
"Honorable knights do not fight whilst laying down in the dirt!" Sherry argued.
"Well maybe we're not honorable, but we're not stupid either! Stay down!" Stavish ordered.
*CRACK!
*ZIP
A bullet flew through another window, and nailed one of Stavish's soldiers. She went down shouting bloody murder, with a huge apple sized dent in her Kevlar helmet. It was Mackenzie.
"I'm okay! I'm okay! Fuck! My head is ringing!" Mackenzie shouted.
"Keep your head down Mack!" Stavish shouted.
"Yeah you fucking greenhorn!" Someone shouted.
Michael prodded Sherry in the arm.
"That's why you stay down. Give me my M14 and gear." Michael insisted.
Sherry produced Michael's rifle from her pocket dimension, along with his load bearing web gear and helmet. He clicked on the radio that was attached to the belt, and buckled his gear on. Then he chambered a round in the M14. Looking around, he got a quick idea of the layout of the theater near their prone position. The gears turned in his head.
"Mike, huddle." Stavish said.
"Yep." Michael said.
"If we wormed our way over to that door, we could take the side hallway up to the roof. There's not many windows. Then we'd have the lip of the roof to cover us. What do you think?" Stavish asked.
"I concur. Akia, you stay here and keep your sensors running non-stop. If you detect something, call it out on the radio. Also keep these civilians down. We can't have them running outside and getting shot." Michael said.
"Yes master." Akia said.
He handed her his radio, and then turned back to Stavish.
"We need to move sir." Stavish said.
And without a single extra wasted moment, Michael started low crawling, making sure to stay below the window sill so he wouldn't get tagged like Mackenzie did. Sherry followed along behind him, and Stavish brought up the rear. As he passed Mackenzie, he patted her on the shoulder. She seemed okay, but she had a hell of a headache. The helmet had saved her life.
"We'll get the bastard." Michael said.
He crawled past, and Sherry crawled up to Mackenzie. She waved a healing hand over her as she passed, which helped with the headache a lot. Stavish quickly followed behind, firmly reminding Mackenzie to stay down.
...
Michael got past the bay windows, and found himself at a steel doorway marked EMPLOYEES ONLY. He reached up and smashed the bar latch, and pushed it open with his shoulder. The three of them crawled inside.
"We can stand here, but watch out for windows. Stay low and fast." Stavish said.
They hurried down the hallways of the theater, passing people along the way. Some civilians had taken cover when the shooting started, at least those who didn't run screaming out the front door right at the beginning. As Michael and party passed them by, Michael repeatedly reminded people to stay down and stay safe. Before long they ended up in the back in the dressing rooms, where they knew a ladder would take them to the roof.
"I go first. You don't come until I give you the all clear. Stay on your bellies the whole way." Stavish said.
She crawled out onto the roof, where there were already a dozen infantry. The design of the roof provided good concealment from the sniper. It was a bowl shaped design with a wall along the edge that gave a good three feet of concealment for anyone in the prone position. There were various drainage pipes going through the wall, so rain water wouldn't pool up on top. Stavish scampered along the roof and took cover along the wall. Shortly later, Michael and Sherry followed her. Several other soldiers were already up there, taking cover right along with them.
"Sherry, my periscope." Michael said.
"Your what?" Sherry asked.
"The thing... in the camouflage pouch. It looks like a long tube with a mirror on it." Michael said.
Sherry reached around in her pocket dimension, pulling out a few incorrect things before finally giving Michael what he wanted. He kept under cover, and carefully raised the periscope over the edge of the wall.
"See anything sir?" Stavish asked.
"No. Do a net call and see if anyone's spotted anything." Michael said quietly.
So Stavish quickly did a net call on the radio, and asked for the information. Nobody had anything to provide. The sniper, for all intents and purposes, had vanished like a ghost.
...
~A Half Hour Later~
...
Michael, having remained motionless on the roof for thirty minutes, had been thinking long and hard about their situation. He put himself in the boots of the enemy, thinking about the best place from which to strike a third time. He had no doubt that the sniper was still out there, and he knew that the target was definitely Sherry. Why else would he target her first? Of course there was nothing stopping Sherry from blinking in and out at will, so that sniper would probably take a crack at Michael or one of the soldiers in order to draw out Sherry. Also, there was the distinct possibility there was more than one sniper. For all they knew, there were snipers scattered all through the area. But for Michael, he was focused on the absolute. He knew for sure there was one sniper at minimum, and he wondered where his hide was.
"If I were this asshole, where would I be?" Michael thought.
He glanced down the length of his body, towards Stavish. She had her M4 cradled in her arms. A light bulb went off in Michael's head.
"The effective range of an M4 is around 440 yards. So... if I wanted to play it safe, I would shoot from a longer distance." Michael said aloud.
"It's six hundred yards sir." Stavish said.
"Have you ever fired an M4 at six hundred yards?" Michael asked.
"Er... no sir. We qualify up to three hundred meters... er... three hundred and thirty yards." Stavish said.
Michael shifted his eye back to the periscope. He scanned the furthest buildings, all while continuing to talk.
"I know that, and the sniper probably knows that. Six hundred yards on paper doesn't mean jack shit in the real world, especially when you're not trained. The M4 won't do it. Not consistently. The barrel is too short, the 62 grain projectile is too light, and you don't have enough velocity." Michael said distantly.
Michael continued to scan slowly and systematically, looking for the enemy in every window and doorway. Meanwhile, nerves were getting frayed all around him. Sherry was especially agitated, with Michael continually in a dangerous situation. She wanted to hop up and attack someone, but there was no one to attack. The soldiers kept their cool much better, but even they were strained. Reports came in over the radio from Akia that the civilians were in a perpetual state of panic. Some of them were sobbing uncontrollably, which wrenched at everyone's heart. They needed to kill that sniper, and fast.
...
"Well well well well well. It's the LDS church." Michael said.
Stavish pivoted around, and Michael handed her the periscope.
"I don't see anythi...wait... ground level. The front door?" Stavish questioned.
"Yeah. It's perfect. He's got a fantastic firing angle on both the main street and the side exit of the theater. There's lots of cover, and he has avenues to escape out the back." Michael reasoned.
*click...click...click
Michael adjusted the rear peep sight on the M14.
"You're going to shoot at him... with fucking IRONS?!" Stavish exclaimed.
"Yup." Michael said.
"That's seven hundred yards!" Stavish exclaimed.
"Seven seven five." Michael corrected.
Between the parking lot of the theater, parking lot of an empty old strip mall, and the parking lot of the church, there was a considerable distance between them, on the order of seven and 3/4 football fields. To a normal person, the doorway of the church wasn't much bigger than a speck in the distance. Michael reached into a pouch of his load bearing vest, and pulled out a special magazine. In that magazine was a special handload that Michael had developed specifically for that rifle, loaded with his beloved Sierra 168 grain Matchking projectiles and a powder charge obsessively measured to fractions of a grain. It was his secret sauce, the thing that made that old M14 shoot like a laser rifle. And he had exactly twenty rounds of it available at that moment. He rocked the magazine into place, and chambered a round.
"It's an impossible shot. Nobody could ever do that with irons." Stavish said.
Michael looked her right in the eyes.
"Watch me." Michael said defiantly.
The muzzle of the M14 slid nicely into a 4 inch drainage pipe, and he spread his legs out with his toes pointing outwards for stability. It was the classic rifleman's prone position.
*Exhaaaaaaaaale
*Inhaaaaaaaaaale
His only hope and prayer was to stop the bad guy before he killed one of his friends. If that meant dumping the entire twenty rounds of lovingly crafted ammo into that doorway, he'd do it. If he killed or wounded the enemy, taking them out of the fight, then his friends would be safe.
"Stavish." Michael said.
"Yes sir." Stavish responded.
"See that flag next to the church? Watch it. Tell me when the wind dies." Michael said.
"On it sir." Stavish said.
...
..
.
"Dying." Stavish said
*Exhaaaaaaaaaale~
"Dead." Stavish said.
*Squeeeeeeeeeeze
*BOOM!
The M14 bucked in his arms... and the door to the church twitched. In that moment, he knew, his target was gone. But that didn't mean he was going to take any chances.
*BOOM!
*BOOM!
*BOOM!
Nineteen more times he fired, once every second, until he was out of ammo. All told, there were twenty chances that he would get to see another Christmas with his friends.
...
..
.
~An Hour Later~
.
..
...
It was a long time before anyone was willing to step out of that theater, or peek out of a window. They took every precaution, even going so far as to set up an empty helmet on a broom stick as bait for a sniper. Nothing happened. No other shooters revealed themselves. So with great caution, Michael, Stavish, Sherry, and a dozen heavily armed inma infantry all converged on the LDS church. When they arrived and opened the door, they found the body of a man laying on the ground with a scoped bolt action rifle in his hands. Michael looked back towards the theater, and then at the body. It was indeed seven hundred and seventy five yards. An incredible, almost unheard of distance in an urban environment.
"So I guess I got him." Michael said casually.
Stavish said nothing. She was at a loss for words. Mackenzie stepped around the huge puddle of blood, and rolled the body over with her boot.
"One... two... three... four..." Mackenzie counted.
...
"You hit him eighteen times sir." Mackenzie said.
"Search him for intelligence." Michael said.
"Yes sir." Mackenzie said.
Stavish shook her head.
"Eighteen out of twenty hits. Holy shit." Stavish muttered.
"I've never seen something like this. He's been shredded as if great beastly talons slashed at his body." Sherry remarked.
"This isn't even a body anymore. It's just goo." Stavish said.
Michael silently turned and ducked back out the door.
"I had better check for others hiding around here. I shall return." Sherry said.
So she walked off to check the rest of the church for other snipers.
...
"Specialist? You'd better take a look at this." Mackenzie said.
She offered up a passport, which Stavish opened and read.
"Son of a bitch. This guy... was British! I thought they were our allies!" Stavish exclaimed.
"Yeah, I thought we were cool. We worked with them in the sandbox." Mackenzie said.
The crowd of soldiers that had accompanied them from the theater began murmuring angrily amongst themselves. Meanwhile, Michael was quickly heading straight towards the nearest trash can.
"Oh shit... I'm going to huuuuuuurrrllllll..." Michael groaned.
"Specialist? Something's wrong with Mike." A soldier said.
Stavish made her way out of the church, and found Michael dry heaving into a waste bin.
...
~Later~
...
"Feeling better sir?" Stavish asked.
Michael was sitting on the ground with his back against the wall of the building, sipping from a water bottle Stavish had given him.
"Yeah. Our boy Coventry looked like he got in a fist fight with a cheese grater. It set my stomach off, and it was already sour to begin with." Michael said.
He took another drink of water.
"I hope Alistair doesn't hate me after this." Michael said.
"I don't think he'll care too much sir. He's Canadian." Stavish said.
"He was born in the UK and moved to Canada. So I hope he doesn't hate me for perforating one of his former countrymen." Michael said.
Stavish's expression turned sorrowful.
...
"Why are the Brits gunning for us now? I thought we were friends? I'd never have believed it if I hadn't have seen that passport." Stavish said.
"Maybe it's fake." Michael suggested.
"A false flag operation? Did the sniper figure on dying today, and having that found on his body?" Stavish wondered aloud.
They never got the chance to continue thinking about it. Right around then is when the cops showed up to the scene. Or more accurately, grew the balls to get closer than twenty city blocks, and only after they learned the sniper was dead. They screamed up to the scene, lights flashing and sirens blaring.
"Great. Here comes the coppers to save us. Yay." Michael said dryly.
"I feel so relieved." Stavish said sarcastically.
...
Before long, an all too familiar face appeared. Serena the manticore police officer, accompanied by two police officers Michael had never seen before. She went straight to the church doors, and looked at the shredded sniper's body.
"Alright, who done it? Who shot him?" Serena asked.
"It was Mike." Stavish blurted.
Michael shot Stavish a withering glare.
"Why is he glaring at me like that?" Stavish thought.
It wasn't until Serena pulled out handcuffs that it dawned on her.
"You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say or do..." Serena started.
"Oh shut up and arrest me already." Michael spat.
"WHOA WHOA WHOA! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Stavish barked.
Serena ignored Stavish and started putting the handcuffs on Michael, who didn't resist at all. Another officer relieved him of his weapons and patted him down.
"Hey! LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Stavish barked.
*SHOVE
She shoved Serena, who immediately shoved right back.
"Stand down!" Michael barked.
"This is bullshit!" Stavish argued.
"Yes it is. But don't kick their ass for doing their job for the first time ever. I killed someone, they have to arrest me. It's the way it is." Michael said calmly.
And with that, the handcuffed Michael was escorted to a police cruiser. He was stuffed like a sardine into the back seat, and forced to suffer through the misery of not fitting in the Crown Vic for the second time in his life. The cruiser roared away, but Serena lingered a little longer.
"Mike has killed multiple people. The first time he got off scot free, but this time he's going to face the judge. Otherwise he'd come off as some sort of vigilante, and we can't have that. I know how you feel, but this is a country of laws." Serena argued.
"Go fuck yourself." Stavish said.
"I'm sorry you feel that way." Serena said.
Stavish was angry, but there was nothing she could do about it. Michael was on his way to jail. Sherry came out of the church just as Serena pulled away in her cruiser.
"Where is my husband?" Sherry asked.
"He was just arrested by the police." Stavish explained.
"WHAT?!" Sherry exclaimed.
...
~Much Later~
...
*CRACK!
A large bald headed man wearing a dirty wife beater went tumbling to the ground, blood hemorrhaging from his nose. Michael stood with his fists at the ready as the twenty angry looking criminals surrounded him. He was inside a large communal jail cell, and the name Michael Collins wasn't very popular amongst the criminal population.
"Kill him! Kill that fucking monster lover!" The perps shouted.
"Bring it shithead!" Michael shouted.
Another crook came at him, and Michael gave him the same treatment he gave the first guy. A crack to the nose, and down he went. A third guy came in immediately after, and Michael nailed him with a left hook. He was unconscious before he even hit the ground. Then three came at once, and Michael took several blows to the face and chest, which he returned in kind. One of the perps wound up getting his head smashed against the steel bars of the jail, right as the cops were coming in to break up the brawl and drag Michael out of the cell. One of the cops whacked the bars of the jail with his nightstick.
"Settle down in there, or I'll come in and make you!" The cop warned.
The perps jeered and whistled mockingly at both the cops and Michael as he was escorted away.
...
..
.
*CRACK
"This court room is now in session. Will the defendant rise?" The judge said.
A bloodied and bruised Michael rose to his feet from his chair at the front of the courtroom.
"Michael Collins, you stand accused of first degree murder, discharging a firearm in city limits, and public endangerment. How do you plead?" The judge asked.
"Not guilty." Michael said.
The recorder officially logged Michael's answer.
.
..
...
The judge was shown all the evidence of what happened, was given police testimony, and testimony from several witnesses including Michael himself. And after hours of typical courtroom procedure, Michael found himself standing before the judge's bench.
"Mr. Collins. It has been made exceedingly clear that you took it upon yourself to kill this sniper. Why?" The judge asked.
"Because sir, I was the only one who could do it. If I ordered the soldiers to attack that sniper with the weapons they had available... they would have died. Then the sniper would have moved, and it might have caused civilians to die. I was the only one in the area who had the skill and equipment to do the job." Michael explained.
The judge slowly nodded his head as he listened.
"And what about discharging your rifle into a far away building? Were you not concerned that people might have been caught in the crossfire?" The judge asked.
"Yes sir. That is another reason why I didn't send out soldiers to stop the shooter. There would have been a firefight, which might have resulted in innocent people hurt. I felt confident I could accurately lay down fire in a way which would keep the danger to a minimum, considering the distance. Furthermore, I reasoned that nobody is inside that LDS church today. The parking lot was completely empty, and it's a weekday." Michael explained.
"I see. You may return to your seat." The judge said.
The judge was silent for several long moments. Everyone was anxious to hear what the verdict was.
"On the charges of first degree murder and endangering the public, the defendant is not guilty. On the charge of discharging a firearm inside city limits, five hundred dollar fine." The judge said.
*CRACK
He smacked the gavel, and the trial was over. Michael wasn't opposed to paying five hundred dollars in order to protect his wife and friends. He would have paid that, even back when he didn't have much money.
"Thank you, your honor." Michael said, smiling.
"Now you listen closely Mr. Collins. If I ever see you in here again for a firearm related charge, or anything related, I will throw you in prison. Do you understand?" The judge warned.
"Yes sir. I ask that you tell your officers to grow some balls." Michael quipped.
"That is out of line Mr. Collins!" The judge said.
"Yes sir, but it's the honest to god truth. The entire time this situation was going on, there wasn't a single police officer to be seen." Michael said.
*GrumbleGrumble
"This courtroom is adjourned." The judge said, grumbling.
...
~Later That Night~
...
Michael and Sherry went back to their apartment, and locked themselves up tight. Between snipers shooting at people, dead bodies, and being arrested, they didn't want to take any chances going to their favorite diner and getting a burger. So Sherry made dinner at home, and Michael made friends with a pair of beers.
"How are you holding up?" Sherry asked.
"Not so great. First I turn into a woman, then all that shit with the sniper happened, then I went to jail. I just want to shut down at this point." Michael said.
"Maybe you could play one of those games you like to play so much." Sherry suggested.
"Yeah I suppose..." Michael started.
...
He sat upright.
"OH SHIT! I FORGOT SOMETHING! WHERE'S AKIA?!" Michael exclaimed.
...
~Meanwhile, Elsewhere~
...
"Please miss robot, we want to go home!" An inma said.
"My master ordered me to keep all civilians from leaving this theater. I must obey my master." Akia said.
"Yeah but the sniper is gone! We just want to go home and get some sleep!" An inma insisted.
"My master ordered me to..." Akia started to say.
"Yes we know! Thanks! I'm sure your master would tell you to let us go now!" An inma argued.
"My master ordered me..." Akia started to say.
"Does it make any logical sense for you to keep us here? Why did your master order you to keep us here?" An inma argued.
...
"Master wished to keep you safe." Akia said.
"And hasn't that sniper been dealt with?" An inma argued.
...
"New directive. You may leave." Akia said.
"Thank you! Finally! I hope my husband hasn't been too worried about me!" An inma exclaimed.
And just like that, the theater emptied of civilians. They all hurried home, leaving Akia alone. She didn't know what to do next, so her programming directed her to return to base.
...
Akia walked home that night, heading towards Michael's apartment. Along the way, she was able to observe all sorts of interesting organic behavior. One of the first things she noticed was the gas station across the street from the theater. A car parked at the gas pumps caught her eye. The owner of that car came out of the gas station while holding a soda, and found Akia standing there... awkwardly staring at his car.
"Hey! You want something?" The man exclaimed.
Akia looked up, then looked back down at the car.
"What is the purpose of this?" Akia asked, pointing.
She pointed at a political bumper sticker. The man dropped his things on the roof of the car, and came around to see what she was pointing at.
"That's a bumper sticker. I voted for Dugan last election. You got a problem with that?" The man said defensively.
"Entity Dugan is irrelevant. What is the purpose of displaying this 'bumper sticker' on your automobile?" Akia asked.
"Er... well... I guess it's because I liked Dugan. At least until he threw inma into a prison." The man said reluctantly.
Akia remained silent for several seconds, before straightening.
"It's crooked." Akia said.
"Yeah I know he's crooked. I should have taken the sticker off." The man admitted.
"No, I mean the sticker is physically crooked. The left hand side is two point one three seven millimeters lower than the right hand side." Akia said.
"Okay?" The man said, uncertain.
"This is fascinating. I wish to see more irregularities." Akia said.
...
"Are you high?" The man asked.
Akia looked up at the sky, then looked at the ground.
"I am on the same level as yourself." Akia said.
"Yeah, you're definitely high. Maybe you had better go home." The man said.
So the guy went to the driver side door, slid into the driver seat, and started driving away. Coincidentally, he forgot his bottle of soda and his wallet on top of the car. They both fell to the ground, and his car disappeared around the corner. Akia bent down and picked up them up.
...
A few minutes later, and that guy was cruising down a nearby street, going the speed limit of forty five miles an hour.
*Taptaptap
He jerked when something tapped on his window. Akia was effortlessly running alongside the car. Slamming on the brakes, the car skidded to a halt on the side of the road. Another car honked and zipped past him.
"What the fuck?!" The man exclaimed.
Akia walked up to the still closed window, and offered up the soda and the wallet.
"You dropped these." Akia said, muffled.
...
He rolled down the window, and Akia handed him his things.
"How the hell did you do that? What the fuck are they putting in speed these days?!" The man exclaimed.
"Error. Unable to answer. Have a nice night." Akia said.
She turned to leave, but the man called after her.
"Wait wait! Just hold on a second! What the hell..." The man said, muttering the last part.
He opened his wallet and fished out a hundred dollars, which he shoved into her hand.
"Here's for bringing me back my wallet. Now go home and sleep it off." The man said.
"Compensation is not requi..." Akia tried to say.
He rolled up his window and drove away before she could finish. Akia stood there with the money in her hand, her programming uncertain what to do. Eventually she concluded that since he gave it to her, it was hers. So she stuck it in a pocket, and turned back towards the apartment.
...
After pursuing that man, Akia had ended up further away from the apartment than ever before. So she had a ways to walk before she would get home. Along the way, she passed a coffee shop.
"Scanning. Low level wireless access point detected. Investigate." Akia thought.
She wandered into the shop, and went straight towards the source of the wireless signal. Before long she ended up standing at the counter for the coffee shop, staring at a wireless router screwed to the wall.
"Can I get you something miss?" A cashier man asked.
"What is that?" Akia asked.
She pointed towards the router. He turned and looked up where she was pointing.
"That's a wireless router. It's so our customers can have free wireless access while they're here." The cashier man explained.
"How do I interface with this device?" Akia asked.
"Well... we only offer the service to paying customers. If you want a coffee..." The cashier man explained.
"I do not require caffeinated beverages." Akia said.
...
"Uh huh. So... that's kind of what we sell here." The cashier man said, struggling to be polite.
"Acknowledged. I would like to purchase one caffeinated beverage." Akia said.
"Right, one espresso... extra strong." The cashier man muttered.
*beepboopbeep
"What name would you like on it?" The cashier man asked.
"Irrelevant." Akia said.
The cashier put down "Irrelevant" for the name. It didn't really matter, he wasn't ever going to forget HER any time soon.
"That will be four fifty." The cashier man said.
"What is four fifty?" Akia questioned.
"Four dollars and fifty cents. You have to pay for the coffee you know." The cashier man said darkly.
Akia fished out the money she had just gotten, and handed the whole wad over to the man.
"Is this sufficient?" Akia asked.
He wordlessly took her money and made the correct change, and gave her a receipt.
"Thank you, it'll be right out." The cashier man said through gritted teeth.
"How may I interface with the..." Akia started to ask.
"The password is on the receipt. NEXT!" The cashier man dismissed.
...
So Akia sat down, and scanned the receipt with her crystal blue eyes. As soon as she found the password, she used her built in transceiver to access the wireless router. A faint smile formed on her lips as she was granted access to the internet. There was so much random human created material on the internet, it provided her endless entertainment sifting through it all. Even when her coffee was ready and sitting in front of her, she paid more attention to the ocean of human randomness laid out behind her eyes. She also accessed all the other devices in the coffee shop, hacking past their shoddy protection out of sheer curiosity. One person in the shop was doing late night school work, one was reading a book, and several were watching youtube videos or listening to music. One guy in the corner was watching hentai porn.
...
Akia discovered a table which had a man sitting at it. He had a laptop, which had several browser tabs open. Every single tab was on the topic of Michael Collins, Searraigh Fontaine, and the sniper attack earlier that day. It caught her attention, and she hacked into the computer further. This lead her to discover an IRC chat program in use, which had an active connection. She was able to read all the previous message history, along with what was being written at each moment. There were four people connected to the chat room.
"Well gentlemen, here it is in writing. He didn't get the target." A user said.
"What the hell happened?! We planned every possibility!" A second user asked.
"You didn't plan for Michael Collins." A user said.
A wall of text followed, which was a dossier of Michael Collins. It was complete with long range high desert marksmanship scores.
"Then we must eliminate this man along with his slut wife before they spread their disease to our motherland." A third user said.
"Does that mean you wish to make another purchase my friends?" A fourth user asked.
"We do." A user said.
"What will it be this time? Another sniper rifle?" A fourth user asked.
"No. This time we wish to purchase an RPG 7. We will conduct a rocket attack when he is in his car. You will get the usual payment." A second user said.
"That's not enough. The last time you bought my guns, you fucked up and lost it all during that shitty fucking attack on the theater. All your men were captured. I had to cover it up so the gobierno didn't find me out. I want more this time." A fourth user said.
"Fine. Our agent will wire double the amount in crypto." A third user said.
"Deal. We can make the trade tonight." A fourth user said.
"Then we are done. Same spot. See you in the next designated chat room." A user said.
The man logged off the chat program, and closed his computer. Akia had already copied every scrap of data from that computer onto her own database, including clues as to where exactly that arms deal was going to take place. She also put a virus on the computer that she cloned from one she found on the internet. The next time he used the computer, it'd blue screen.
...
Meanwhile, Akia was busy remotely hacking the computers of the other users who had been in the chat room. That hack lead her to another series of computers elsewhere in the United States, which lead her to a foreign governmental network on the other side of the world. After a while, she finished her caffeinated beverage and left to visit the site of the arms deal. Her return to the apartment was going to have to wait.
...
..
.
~The Next Day~
.
..
...
*taptaptap
Michael jerked awake when someone tapped his shoulder. He had fallen asleep in his chair that night, waiting for Akia to return. That was of course after hours of late night searching the neighborhood for his wayward automaton.
"I have returned master. Please reboot. I must input data." Akia said.
It took Michael a moment to work past the sleep inertia, where he wiped the sleep out of his eyes and yawned.
"You... what? Data?" Michael questioned sleepily.
"I have returned master. Please reboot. I must input data." Akia repeated.
...
"Ready..." Michael yawned.
"I have eliminated the hostiles who threatened you." Akia said.
Michael yawned again.
"Is that right? And how did you do that?" Michael asked slowly.
Akia seemed to be getting a little impatient with the slow pace of the conversation, so she raised her finger and pointed it at him. The skin retracted in a patch on her fingertip, and a retractable data cable popped out.
*Poke
*Pokepoke
"Where is your interface port master?" Akia asked.
He swatted her hand out of his face.
"I'm a human, not an automaton! I don't have an interface port!" Michael exclaimed.
"What in the blazes is going on out here?" Sherry suddenly said.
She came stumbling out of the bedroom, pulling on a thin nighty as she went. What she found... make her skid to a halt.
"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO MY LIVING ROOM?!" Sherry screeched.
Michael furrowed his eyebrows, and followed her line of sight. There was a huge heaping pile of Warsaw Pact ordnance piled up by the front door. The pile was nearly to the ceiling, and completely consumed the front of the apartment, even going so far as to block the window. Only the front door was accessible. There were stacks and stacks of AKs, RPGs, grenades, ammo, RPKs, PKMs, RPDs, and even a couple Dragunovs. A flamethrower of unknown origin was leaning against the Zenith television, which lead Michael's eyes up to the heaping mound of Tokarev TT33s piled up on top next to the bunny ear antenna.
*Thunk!
An unloaded RPG tube rolled off the top of the pile and landed on the carpet. Michael tightly gripped the padded arms of his chair.
"I'm sorry master, I..." Akia tried to say.
"No no, don't say it. Nobody say anything. Absolute... silence. I'm having a good dream right now~" Michael cooed.
He slowly rose up out of his chair, and staggered towards the mountain of rifles like a thirsty man stumbles towards a drinking fountain. He fell to his knees, and picked up an AK.
"It's... it's real. Not that fake ass shit they sell here in the states. It's full featured. Safe, auto, and semi~." Michael said happily.
*Knockknockknock
Michael slowly looked up towards the front door. The AK slid out of his fingers.
*Knockknockknock
Michael reached over and picked up the RPG tube, and fished a rocket out of a nearby wooden crate. He loaded it, staggered to his feet, and answered the door.
"Good morning sir I... holy shit!" Stavish started.
She actually skittered back a little when she saw Michael answer the door with a loaded RPG on his shoulder.
"Hey Stavish. I have a letter for the BATF." Michael quipped.
"I see that!" Stavish exclaimed, wide eyed.
Her eyes raked across the launcher.
"You didn't take the safety cap off, and the hammer isn't cocked." Stavish observed.
"I know that. I'm not that crazy." Michael said.
He stepped back, and Stavish came inside. The RPG tube and rocket were returned safely to the pile.
"You wouldn't believe how many piles of ordnance identical to this I saw in the sand box. Where'd you get it?" Stavish asked.
"Ask her. I have no idea." Michael said, pointing towards Akia.
"I acquired them from a Mexican drug cartel." Akia said, matter of fact.
Michael and Stavish blinked.
"You're going to have to give a hell of a lot more information than that." Michael said dryly.
*Pokepoke
"And not digitally!" Michael exclaimed, swatting her hand away.
"Yes master. It all started when I hacked into a computer and discovered a plot to attack you and entity Searraigh." Akia said.
"Whoa whoa, back up. Hacking? Computer? What? Where? When?" Stavish exclaimed.
Akia hesitated.
"It all started with a when I was chasing an automobile on main street..." Akia started.
"Why the hell were you chasing a car on main street?" Michael asked.
...
"It all started when I found a political bumper sticker." Akia started.
Michael, Sherry, and Stavish all crossed their arms.
"It all started when I kept several people detained..." Akia tried again.
So Akia retold her story, up to and just after the coffee shop. Then she recounted how she left the shop, and proceeded to the location of the arms deal. Once there, she used overwhelming firepower to stun everyone involved. She detained them, and deposited them at the theater on 5th and B.
"That's why I came over. I wanted to know why there were a dozen guys all tied up and gagged in the main hall of the theater. I showed up to work this morning and practically tripped over them." Stavish noted.
"What'd you do with them?" Michael asked.
"I handed them over to the cops. They didn't want to take them at first, but I bitched until they did." Stavish said.
"Good. Let them spiral down the nine layers of legal hell for a while. Maybe they'll end up at gitmo." Michael said.
"Wouldn't even bat an eye over it." Stavish said.
"If the police let them go, we'll just go kill them. Simple." Sherry interjected.
Michael, Stavish, and Akia all shot Sherry a concerned look.
...
..
.
After that, Akia described how she secured all the weapons at the site of the arms deal, and brought them to the apartment. She also secured the crypto, which she stored on her own database.
"So they were going to sell all these guns to some foreign enemies? Isn't that a lot?" Michael asked.
"No master. Only a small number of these were included with the original deal. The rest I acquired by eliminating the arms dealer." Akia explained.
"Which would be the Mexican drug cartel, right?" Michael asked.
"That is partially correct. The guns came from the Mexican cartel. They were a threat, and they would have continued attempting to sell weapons to your enemies. So I liquidated them." Akia explained.
The room fell silent for several extended moments.
"So... does anyone have a problem with that?" Michael asked.
"Nope." Stavish said.
"I couldn't care less." Sherry said.
"Agreed. Continue." Michael said.
"After liquidating the arms dealer, I discovered data which lead me to the cartel branch in Mexico. So I traveled there and attacked their compound. One of them tried to damage me with a flame thrower, but he failed. Instead, he set fire to a building housing an unknown white powder." Akia explained.
Michael eyed the flamethrower leaning against his TV.
"Wait... white powder? You mean cocaine?" Stavish asked.
"I do not contain that data. After eliminating all hostiles in the area, I gathered and secured their weapons in the back of a vehicle known as a semi truck. Once there, I piloted the vehicle back to this location." Akia explained.
"How'd you get the guns across the US border?" Michael asked.
"I stunned anyone who got in the way." Akia explained.
Michael facepalmed.
"What the hell have you unleashed on the world Mike?" Stavish asked.
"Akia, you can't shoot the border patrol." Michael said quietly.
"The border patrol are the ones who lead me to discover the location of the cartel. They were the arms dealers." Akia said.
...
"Did she... just say what I think she said?" Stavish asked.
"Yes she did." Michael said.
"I handed over all data regarding the border patrol involvement with the cartel over to the Department of Homeland Security. I also hacked their servers and ensured they would investigate it." Akia reassured.
Michael slowly shook his head.
"Continue." Michael said flippantly.
...
"Master, I also discovered which country sent the sniper." Akia added.
Michael's eyes widened. He immediately glanced at Sherry, who was listening to the whole conversation very closely. Just the look on her face told him that bad things would happen if she learned the name of that country.
"Akia, that information is hereby classified for my eyes only!" Michael said immediately.
"Yes master." Akia said.
"Hey! I want to know what country dared attack us! I'll wipe them from the face of the earth!" Sherry exclaimed.
"I know you will, which is why you'll never know who did it. Ever." Michael said flatly.
He looked back towards Akia and Stavish.
"I know exactly who did it, and I'm sure you do too. It's not hard to figure out. Just put two and two together." Michael said.
"Yeah... You know... I think I do." Stavish said, nodding.
"I don't like this distrust you have revealed." Sherry said darkly.
"It's not that we don't trust you, it's just that you tend to get a little fired up sometimes. We'll deal with these hostiles soon enough, but we don't want to start another war in the process." Michael said.
"That's the last thing we need." Stavish interjected.
"Very well. I suppose you are right. As you said though, it is obvious. It was certainly Russia." Sherry said casually.
"Pfffft..." Michael laughed.
"Truly! I saw it on the television! A man named James Bond was fighting them!" Sherry insisted.
"That wasn't real." Stavish said dryly.
"Whaaaaa?!" Sherry exclaimed.
"And Russia is too obvious. Sure they hate us, but I doubt Russia would attack us directly. No... it was someone else." Michael said.
...
"That's it. I'm not saying anything else. And anyways, I don't have any proof." Michael said.
Sherry pouted.
"I want to do something though. Having my face shoved into the dirt was displeasing." Sherry insisted.
"Okay, fine. Could you go with Akia to wherever she found those cartel... and make absolutely sure they're all gone? Every single last one?" Michael asked.
"Certainly!" Sherry said cheerfully.
"Great. I don't want to hear about them ever again." Michael said.
Sherry drew her sword and caught Akia's arm.
"This should be fun!" Sherry cheered.
*Crackle WHOOSH!
...
"Did you seriously just unleash the mistress on the cartels?" Stavish asked.
"Yup." Michael said.
"They don't stand a chance." Stavish said.
"Nope." Michael said.
"Aren't you worried?" Stavish asked.
"Nah. I'm sure she's smart enough to bring me back all their guns." Michael said.
"That's not what I meant. What if they kill her?" Stavish asked.
"Then she'll murder them all as a succubus ghost." Michael said.
"What if she blows up Mexico?" Stavish asked.
"She won't. She's not THAT destructive. I think." Michael said.
"YOU THINK?! What about my Kahlua supply!?" Stavish fretted.
"Don't worry Stavish, I'm sure everything will be fine. I love Kahlua too." Michael reassured.
...
"So about the guns." Michael and Stavish said at the same time.
...
"Yeah?" Michael asked.
"Want them put in the armory?" Stavish asked.
"Yup." Michael said.
"I'll send a detail to collect it all." Stavish said.
"You're the best~" Michael said happily.
...
~Later~
...
Michael had started his day by taking a shower and shaving, and getting dressed in clean clothes. He was in the bedroom pulling a shirt out of the dresser when Sherry returned.
*CrackleWHOOSH!
"Oh sweetie~ I'm back!" Sherry called.
"Hey welcome back! Any news?" Michael asked.
"Yep! I got rid of those pesky cartel! You won't be hearing from them again!" Sherry said cheerfully.
"Great! How'd you do it?" Michael asked.
"Well it turned out they used forced labor to produce some sort of low quality human drug, so I turned all the workers into inma! Then I gave them some of the weapons I found! They're busy raping those silly cartel~" Sherry explained, giggling the last part.
"That's karma for you." Michael said.
Sherry slid up behind him began massaging his shoulders.
"Oooooohhhhh... yeah~" Michael moaned.
He went limp and sagged against the dresser, pushing the drawer closed with his body. Sherry softly and gently guided him over to the bed, where she pushed him down and worked on his back.
"Inma drugs are better anyways." Sherry said.
"You and your... *gasp... Ohhhh... damn drugs..." Michael moaned.
Michael's eyes rolled up into his head.
"Just relax. You've earned it. I'm going to service you head-to-toe..." Sherry said breathily.
"Hmmm... you're extra nice today. What'd I do?" Michael asked, muffled.
Sherry leaned in, gently caressed his cheek, and whispered in his ear.
"You kept my head attached to my body." Sherry whispered.
*Rub
*Rubrub
*Massagerubrub
...
"You saved my life yesterday sweetie. I cannot ignore that. As a knight, I especially cannot ignore it." Sherry said softly.
"You saved my life when I got in that car accident in Vegas." Michael countered.
"That doesn't count. I was the reason why you got hurt in the first place. You would never have stepped in that street if not for me." Sherry said.
*Rubrubrub
"So I've been thinking... I have a spell in mind that I've considered drafting. Want to hear it?" Sherry asked softly.
"Sure, what is it?" Michael asked, curious.
"I thought that maybe I could go back in time and steal you away from your parents, and raise you myself." Sherry explained.
*YANK!
Michael forcefully pulled his body out of her grasp.
"There's no way you're that powerful!" Michael exclaimed.
Sherry blinked a few times in surprise.
"Of course I am sweetie. Can't you tell?" Sherry asked innocently.
He backed away from her.
"I just wanted to check with you first before I did it. Perhaps you would like to live somewhere specific? Maybe you'd like me to raise you a certain way? We should discuss it so I make sure your childhood is perfect." Sherry explained.
"NO!" Michael said forcefully.
"But sweetie, don't say no so quickly! You could avoid all the pain and suffering you were forced to endure growing up! You wouldn't get sick all the time, and I would obviously treat you much better than your parents! And who knows, I might be able to tweak the spell to suck you into my world, so you could grow up amongst the inma you so love!" Sherry argued.
"Maybe I love inma, but we don't need people screwing with the timeline. For all we know, we'd end up starting an apocalypse or something!" Michael said.
"A sex apocalypse. Or sexpocalypse if you will." Sherry said, smiling.
She reached out and wrapped her arms around Michael, and pushed him onto his back. Straddling him, she kissed his lips repeatedly while wiggling her hips and cuddling up as close as she could get. She rocked her body back and forth, rubbing her soft hip against his bulge.
"I could do this for you every day. You would grow up, wrapped up in a sea of pleasure. All that wasted time from before we first met would no longer be wasted. You could even have Akia as a childhood friend, wouldn't that be nice?" Sherry suggested.
"No..." Michael stammered.
"You don't want Akia as a friend? That's really sad." Sherry pouted.
"I meant I don't want you to time travel." Michael countered.
"I don't think you're being honest. I think the idea is making you super excited, especially down here~" Sherry purred.
*Rubrubrub
"I need to do something big to make up for everything you've done. Try to think of something. Maybe you'd like me to make you seven feet tall, or give you a horse cock. Something so my honor as a knight is satisfied." Sherry insisted.
Her body movements increased in speed, which made Michael moan.
"What do you want sweetie. Name anything. Anything in the world." Sherry insisted.
"I just... want to... I'm close..." Michael moaned.
"Oh is that right? Well then...~" Sherry chuckled.
She slid his clothes out of the way, and forced herself on his length. He was already on the edge just from her teasing, but going inside was just too much. He came instantly. But that wasn't all. Sherry also cast a spell on him while he was in mid orgasm, which prolonged the orgasm for several minutes. She basically froze a moment in time, proving that she was indeed powerful enough to follow through with her offer.
...
~Later~
...
Michael wandered out of the bedroom, having changed his clothes for a SECOND time. He was in a good mood, and all the feel good chemicals were pounding his brain from what Sherry had just done to his body. Heading into the lab, he found Akia on his computer watching Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid. It put him in an even better mood seeing her enjoying such a simple thing.
"Hey, looks like you're having fun." Michael observed.
"Yes master!" Akia said lightly.
He pulled up a chair and sat next to her, and watched the show with her for a while. It was Akia who decided to pause it.
"Master? Why were you sleeping in your chair last night?" Akia asked.
"I stayed up waiting for you. I was worried." Michael said.
"I'm sorry master." Akia said quietly.
"Maybe I should get you a cell phone, so you can call and give me a heads up next time." Michael reasoned.
Almost immediately after he said that, his phone rang. He slid his hand into his cargo pocket and fished out his old trusty Nokia 3390. On the screen was a pixel art graphic of a waving automaton.
*Deedle-oodoo deedle-oodoo deedle-oodoo-doo
"Uh... hello?" Michael said into the phone.
"Hello master. I have hacked into the cellular telephone network. I may now contact you whenever is needed while on this world." The phone said.
As he listened to Akia's voice come out of his phone, he noticed that Akia's actual mouth was not moving.
"You can do that? That's so cool!" Michael exclaimed.
"Thank you master. I am happy you are pleased." The phone said.
*beep
The call ended, and he slid his phone back in his pocket.
"That said, don't make it a habit doing that. It's illegal. Okay?" Michael suggested.
"Yes master. As you command. I only intend to use it for emergencies, if I am damaged or in need of assistance." Akia said.
"Fantastic. Even a phone without service can call for help, so I'm okay with that." Michael said, smiling.
...
So they turned back to the computer, and Akia clicked play to resume the show. A few moments after she did, Michael let out a strange yelp.
"Master?" Akia questioned, pausing her show again.
"I'm okay. Wow, what was that? Did I just have a cramp?" Michael wondered.
He rubbed his lower stomach, where the cramp happened. His cheeks turned a little rosy.
"Ah!" Michael cried.
"Master!" Akia exclaimed.
"Ahem... excuse me a moment." Michael said.
He stood up and walked out of the room. Akia noticed he was a little unsteady on his feet.
...
..
.
"Okay Sherry, what did you do to me this time?" Michael asked.
"Whatever do you mean?" Sherry asked, batting her eyelashes.
"Don't do that. You put another crazy spell on me, didn't you?" Michael countered.
"I certainly did~ You said you wanted to climax, so I made it where you climax every time I climax. Also, every time I get horny or wet, you'll feel it." Sherry explained, grinning devilishly.
"So what the hell was that just now?" Michael asked.
"I thought of you, so I came a little." Sherry said sweetly.
...
"You orgasm... just THINKING about me?" Michael exclaimed, surprised.
"Certainly! Most succubii do that. It's normal." Sherry said.
Michael mouthed the word 'normal' to himself.
"If you want to see me really gush, try taking off your shirt." Sherry suggested.
"No thanks." Michael said dryly.
He turned around to walk away, and didn't make it two steps before his whole body lit on fire.
"Oooohhhh~" Michael moaned.
...
"What... what was it that time!?" Michael panted.
"Your butt looks sexy~" Sherry purred.
...
*Deedle-oodoo deedle-oodoo deedle-oodoo-doo
"Ah shit, talk about bad timing." Michael grumbled.
Michael reached into his cargo pocket to answer his ringing cell phone.
"Hello?" Michael said into the phone.
"It's Stavish. We have a problem." The phone said.
"What kind of problem?" Michael asked into the phone.
"This line isn't secure sir. Please get here asap." The phone said.
"Yeah, I'm on my way. Hold tight." Michael said into the phone.
*beep
He hung up... and instantly doubled over.
"Hah...hah... Sherry!" Michael exclaimed.
"Sorry sweetie, but it turns me on when you take charge~" Sherry said seductively.
"Ugh. When does this spell wear off?" Michael asked.
"At the end of the day. Are you bored with it already?" Sherry asked.
"Inconvenienced would be a better word." Michael said dryly.
So Michael went into the bedroom to go get his jacket and wallet. Within moments of entering the room, a sharp cry echoed out into the hallway.
"Sherry!" Michael exclaimed from the other room.
"Sorry sweetie! I just envisioned you changing your shirt in there!" Sherry called.
...
~Later~
...
Michael, Sherry, and Akia appeared at the theater shortly thereafter. Unlike last time, they made sure to teleport into the depths of the theater so nobody would take potshots at them. Stavish appeared with a dark knight in tow.
"Sir, this... person showed up a little while ago, demanding to see you. She said that Druella sent her." Stavish said.
"That's mistress Druella to you." The dark knight said bluntly.
"There's no need for that. What does your mistress need from me?" Michael asked politely.
"Mistress Druella has sent me to relay her displeasure, and has commanded thee to return to the Lescatie family mansion to explain yourself." The dark knight explained.
Everyone hesitated, blinking in surprise.
"What? Why?" Michael asked.
"She demands you explain why you sent such an uncouth beast of a man to negotiate on behalf of your world." The dark knight explained.
Again, everyone hesitated.
"I didn't send anyone. Did either of you?" Michael asked.
"No sir. That's beyond my pay grade." Stavish said.
"I wouldn't have sent anyone without warning you sweetie." Sherry said.
...
Everyone swore at the same time.
"Someone snuck through! It has to be it! Un freaking believable!" Michael exclaimed.
"If that's true, then someone is trying to go over the mistress's head to get at Druella. They might be worried more people like her will come to Earth." Stavish reasoned.
"A small detachment of battle mages like myself would crush the world in days." Sherry said.
"I'd better go smooth this over with Druella." Michael said.
"Right. I have a way where we might be able to track down who it was. We have security cameras now, and I've got a new intelligence person who can do some digging." Stavish said.
"Great! Sherry will stay here with you and go shut down whatever alphabet agency it is, once you figure it out!" Michael said excitedly.
"Hey wait a moment, I want to go with you!" Sherry pouted.
"It'll just be a little while. Please?" Michael asked nicely.
"Very well... but just this time." Sherry sighed.
"Akia will go with me, if that makes you feel better." Michael said.
"It does. Go, and return quickly!" Sherry pressed.
...
So Michael and Akia made their way into the Quonset hut that contained the gateway to Lescatie. Akia tugged on Michael's shirt sleeve.
"Master." Akia said quietly.
"Yes? What's wrong?" Michael asked.
"I would have been better at discovering the origin of the unknown entity than Searraigh." Akia said.
"Probably." Michael said.
"It is not logical for me to accompany you when I should be doing that task." Akia said.
"I know." Michael said.
"Entity Searraigh cannot interface with computers like I can." Akia said.
"Uh huh." Michael said.
"I proved my abilities yesterday." Akia added.
"Yep, you sure did." Michael said.
...
"Please explain master. I wish to understand. Why am I underutilized? Why do you let me play games all the time, and never ask me to serve you?" Akia asked.
"Because you were in a glass box for thousands of years. I just want you to enjoy life for a little while. That's all. I don't have the heart to tell you to do anything." Michael said.
Akia's eyes peered into Michael's for a few moments. He didn't realize it at the time, but it made her very happy to hear those words.
"When my creators put me into storage, I knew that someday I would be needed for some purpose. I am a tool. Please use me. I have waited thousands of years to be useful." Akia pleaded.
"You're more than a tool Akia. And don't worry, you're useful. No doubt." Michael reassured.
...
~Shortly Later~
...
After stepping through the gateway and exiting the Lescatie house, Michael and Akia found their way over to the Lescatie family mansion. When they got to the door, the cursed swordswoman watched them with shielded eyes.
"Hello! Would you like a hug?" Michael offered.
For the first time ever, the cursed swordswoman shook her head side to side. She opened the door, and gestured inside with her sword arm.
"Oh... okay. Sorry." Michael said, dejected.
He went inside, but Akia was blocked by the cursed swordswoman.
"Master? She's not letting me in." Akia called.
"It's fine. This is the Lescatie family mansion. It's safe here. So just chill at the house, and I'll be right back. If I need anything, I'll radio you." Michael said.
"Yes master." Akia said.
...
So Michael made his way through the mansion. As he passed various guards and servants on his way to Druella's throne room, they all either avoided looking at him or gave him a dark expression. He got the distinct feeling that he wasn't quite welcome anymore.
...
*Clang!
He found himself in the throne room, with Druella sitting upon her throne. The moment she saw him, she jumped to her feet.
"How DARE you send that man here! I've never been so insulted in my life!" Druella boomed.
She raised her hand, and powerful magic began swirling around her fingers.
"I should curse you!" Druella exclaimed.
"Wait! I didn't send him!" Michael cried.
"You... didn't?" Druella hesitated.
Her hand lowered slightly.
"No! He snuck through the portal on his own! I came to stop him before he caused trouble!" Michael explained quickly.
Her hand lowered completely, and the magic faded away.
"And he did. If you hadn't have told me that just now, I was going to turn you into a dog." Druella said.
Michael's eyes narrowed.
"That's a little harsh, don't you think? I thought we were friends. Why would you do that to me?" Michael said defensively.
Druella sighed.
"... You're right. I'm sorry Michael. Please forgive me. Let us talk about this in my study. I'll have the maids bring tea." Druella said softly.
"Alright, that sounds fine." Michael said evenly.
...
~Shortly Later~
...
*Clink
Michael took a sip of his tea while Druella took a small bite from a type of scone.
"That man... was insulting! He didn't even TRY to negotiate with me, he just offloaded a wagon full of ridiculous demands!" Druella complained.
"Such as?" Michael asked.
"He demanded that I remove Searraigh from your world, undo the changes your people have undergone, and then pay for damages!" Druella recounted.
"And I presume you told him no." Michael guessed.
"Of course! But that didn't stop him from threatening me if I didn't comply! Your nation is run by bullies! They have no honor whatsoever!" Druella exclaimed.
Michael nodded.
"Yep. Tell me something I don't know." Michael said.
He took another casual sip of his tea, as if what she had said was just normal. Because it was.
"He threatened to send a powerful army from your world if I did not comply! I could not believe such a threat would come from a place that you called home!" Druella said.
"Like I said, I didn't send him. I wouldn't have ever made a threat like that." Michael said.
"I realize that now. I'm sorry for threatening you with a curse. Surely I would have regretted it within minutes of cursing you, and quickly undone it." Druella said.
"I'm sure that would have made me feel much better." Michael said dryly.
...
"So what'd you do with the suit?" Michael asked.
"The what?" Druella asked.
"The suit. You know... the man who came here." Michael said.
"OH! Well... I threw him in the punishment pit." Druella said.
Michael nodded, and took a bite of a scone.
"I figured as much." Michael said.
"Maybe some tentacle rape will straighten him out. Then I'll throw him to the unmarried ones. If I'm in an especially bad mood, he'll wind up dressed in red and thrown to a minotaur." Druella said.
"I'm fine with that. Serves him right." Michael said casually.
...
Several quiet moments passed.
...
*CrackleWHOOSH
Druella cast a teleportation spell, and a large parchment scroll appeared in her hand. She laid it on the table between the tea cups and little plates with scones. Michael didn't even have to ask what it was, he knew it was the treaty Diplomat Castor had originally drafted for Michael to sign.
"Heed my words. I will only negotiate the treaty between our countries with you. None other. Not Searraigh, not Lord Grey, not your elected representatives. Only you." Druella said.
Michael casually took the scroll, and read it. It wasn't much changed from the last time he had read it, other than it specified that the treaty was between Druella's Lescatie and Michael's inma. Not Sherry's inma, Michael's inma. He didn't care too much about that distinction, but it was a nice gesture. But most importantly, it was no longer between Lescatie and the United States.
"You changed it the way I asked." Michael noted.
"Of course. That's what negotiations are for." Druella said, smiling.
...
The treaty was a pretty simple one. It treated Michael, Sherry, and all the inma associated with them as their own government, and formally made Lescatie an ally. A non aggression pact was included, along with a vow to negotiate military aid should either party need it. Michael couldn't help but chuckle over that, it was far more likely that Lescatie would need aid as opposed to Michael. But since it wasn't specific, only stating a standing right to 'negotiate', Michael didn't complain about it. The treaty also specified open trade between the two parties. All of that was well and good, but one particular amendment to the treaty caught Michael's eye.
"What's this part about demonic energy?" Michael asked.
"Your world is producing quite a lot of demonic energy. We want it. But it technically belongs to Searraigh, since it's of her doing. This treaty is simply declaring the demonic energy is Searraigh's, and that you acknowledge this statement as true." Druella explained.
"What's the point in that?" Michael asked.
"We have faith that Searraigh will never cut us off from the demonic energy, but someone else from your world may try to claim it belongs to them so they can force us to capitulate at a future negotiation table. It's happened before." Druella explained.
"As long as I don't end up stuck with it. I've had enough of that for a while." Michael said.
"Hmm? What does that mean?" Druella asked.
"It means Sherry thought it would be a bright idea to keep a huge pool of the stuff under our home... and it eroded a hole in the floor." Michael recounted.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Whoopsie!" Druella laughed.
"Hahahaha... yeah." Michael said quietly.
So he kept right on reading the treaty.
There were other matters specified, such as Fort Chell becoming an embassy territory belonging to the new government, and a right to travel between Lescatie and the United States through the portal. There was even a part which vowed military support from Druella in defending Fort Chell, in the form of magician advisors.
"Magician advisors?" Michael questioned.
"I wish to send some mages to Fort Chell, so they can place wards which will protect against magical attacks from the Order. It's honestly surprising it hasn't already happened by now." Druella said.
Michael nodded in understanding, and kept reading.
"I see here that you want to send people to my world so you can learn more about us." Michael said.
"That's right. I don't know much of your world, but what little Searraigh has told me already has perked my interest. It's clearly an imperfect world, but with much promise." Druella said.
"Yeah but... this treaty also specifies that people will come from my world to your world for the same reasons." Michael said.
"Of course. That's only fair. I welcome them." Druella said.
"I think it's a bad idea. You're going to end up with more of those suits coming here." Michael said.
Druella's eyes darkened.
"Well I don't want that..." Druella muttered.
...
"But I want to know more of your world." Druella muttered.
Michael sighed.
"I guess that means I'll have to do my best to make sure they don't come here." Michael said.
He pulled out a pen, and signed his name on the treaty. Druella looked on, her eyes lit up with joy.
"You... actually signed it!" Druella exclaimed.
"Of course. You changed what I asked to get changed." Michael said.
Michael noticed his signature began to glow crimson. It took on a burned look, as did the rest of the text on the document. What he had just signed... was permanent.
"Whoa." Michael said, wide eyed.
"Lescatie always honors it's treaties. They are eternal." Druella said, grinning devilishly.
*Siiiip
She took a sip of her tea, a victorious smirk on her face.
"So what happens when someone wants to back out of a treaty?" Michael asked.
"What do you mean? Do you regret signing already?" Druella asked.
"No, I'm just curious. I don't want to back out." Michael said.
"Well... the only way to nullify the contract is to have all the original signers or their next of kin strike their names out. If everyone strikes their name, the contract will dissolve." Druella said.
"Dissolve?" Michael asked.
"Indeed. Here, let me show you." Druella said.
She produced a small bit of paper, and while borrowing Michael's pen quickly drew up a test contract. Then she signed it.
"Here you go." Druella said.
Michael read the piece of paper. It simply spelled out in the contract that Druella would pour Michael one cup of tea, signed and dated. Michael shrugged and signed it.
*Fwoof!
The lettering turned crimson, and took on the same burned look the real treaty had.
"The contract is signed and in effect. Now cross out your name if you wish to nullify the treaty." Druella said.
So Michael drew two lines through his signature. Handing it back to Druella, she also crossed out her signature. The piece of paper glowed crimson, and then turned into ashes.
"And that's how it works." Druella said.
"That's super cool. Thanks for showing me." Michael said, smiling.
"Of course, with that said, would you like another cup of tea? No contract required." Druella asked.
Michael chuckled and nodded, and offered her his cup. She happily poured him another cup of that fantastic Lescatie tea.
"We inma take our contracts very seriously. Especially marriage contracts." Druella said.
"Oh I could imagine." Michael said.
"I once heard of an inma who formed a contract with a man who despised inma. He gave her a list of impossible tasks, in which on completion would earn her his hand in marriage. She certainly went everywhere and did everything to complete those tasks." Druella recalled.
"And what happened?" Michael asked.
"Never underestimate a desperate inma." Druella said, smiling.
...
..
.
"So there's another contract I would like you to sign, if you're willing." Druella said suddenly.
"Oh yeah? What's it about?" Michael asked, curious.
"Here, look it over for yourself." Druella said.
She held out her hand, and a scroll appeared in her palm. Michael took it, and unraveled it. Right at the top of the contract was Michael's full name, and title as Earl Marshal.
"Uh..." Michael said, uncertain.
"It's a contract... about you." Druella said.
He began reading with furrowed eyebrows. It started out innocently enough, detailing his full name and his title, along with his Lescatie house address. It covered a monthly wage in gold, and detailed how any trips to a healer would be free under Druella. It even went into the medieval equivalent of a dental plan.
"Ohhh, I get it! It's an employee contract!" Michael reasoned.
Druella smiled.
"I wouldn't call it that exactly. It's more like citizenship documents." Druella thought.
Michael continued reading.
"What's this part about the Earl Marshal being considered royalty?" Michael asked.
"It's exactly as it sounds. An Earl Marshal is a royal hereditary office. Your family, as well as your children, are all now a royal family. I didn't have an Earl Marshal before, so you're the first in what will hopefully be a very long family line." Druella explained.
...
"You're scowling. What's wrong?" Druella asked.
"I'm Irish and American. I don't like royalty." Michael said dryly.
"You do realize I am a princess." Druella countered.
"Okay so maybe I like one royal." Michael admitted.
"You like me? I'm glad~" Druella said, smiling.
Michael continued reading.
"What does this part mean that says I have to become a 'proper' member of society?" Michael asked.
"Oh that's merely a formality I put in all contracts of this nature. Remember, there are a great number of foreigners in Lescatie, and it is important that we preserve Lescatian culture." Druella explained.
"Yeah but what does it mean... specifically?" Michael asked.
Druella hesitated.
"Darn it. He asked. I had hoped he wouldn't ask." Druella thought.
...
"Well as my Earl Marshal, you would be asked to change your standard of living. Quality clothes would be provided to replace the shoddy rags you're currently wearing." Druella said.
"Hey I resent that! My wife gave me this jacket!" Michael shot.
"Peace, I mean no offense. As I was saying, you would be given fine garments. You would be expected to take part in any public celebrations, you would be invited to view Lescatie art, partake in our music and wine, and most importantly participate in our new genealogy project." Druella explained, murmuring the last part.
Michael had been nodding along as she spoke, but that last part completely blindsided him. He did a double take.
"Wait what? What was that last part?" Michael asked.
"Oh it's just a little project we're dabbling with. It deals with research into family ties. We want to ensure our families are strong well into the future. Families mean everything to inma." Druella said evasively.
"Uh... huh..." Michael said, suspicious.
"So please be sure to sign your name in a legible manner, and get this mere formality out of the way." Druella said cheerfully.
"You speak like a politician. You say a lot, without saying much at all. I don't like that." Michael warned.
"I am sorry to have offended thee." Druella said.
"Now tell me in plain and simple words, what does this mean?" Michael asked, poking the treaty.
Druella sagged.
"It means we want you to produce a heir within the next year. At latest." Druella said.
The wheels turned in Michael's head.
"A year huh? And how do you propose I get Sherry pregnant in a year? For that matter, why is it any of your business?" Michael asked.
"It's my business... because we must preserve your family line. You are one of the most unique and skilled humans I've ever met. The thought of what you'll become when you turn into an incubus is exciting and frightening at the same time. I wonder if you are in the same vein as my father." Druella mused.
Michael remained silent, drumming his fingers on the table.
"If Searraigh does not become pregnant with your child within a short time, which we know she will not, then I shall provide you with as many women as it takes to generate a daughter. It will be your duty as Earl Marshal to impregnate one of them." Druella explained.
Michael clicked his pen shut, and rolled up the contract without signing it.
"I'm going to have to pass on this one." Michael said calmly.
"But why?" Druella asked, surprised.
She looked genuinely surprised by Michael's flat refusal.
"Because I'm married." Michael said dryly.
"Yes. To Searraigh. My copy. She won't have a problem with this, because I wouldn't." Druella said.
"Well you're mistaken, because she doesn't want me looking at other women. Much less boinking other women." Michael said.
"REALLY! Are you sure? That doesn't seem right." Druella asked, surprised.
"One time I looked at a real hottie in a bar, and Sherry kicked me under the table. She was really mad at me. I felt like she was going to slit my throat." Michael recounted.
"That's just silly Michael, and you know it. Searraigh could never harm you, not even a little." Druella denied.
"Whatever you say. Maybe a little bit of the old Sherry is still left." Michael said.
"That's impossible. If even a fraction of that knight were left, she would behead you for daring to look at a woman with lewd eyes. Such things are forbidden in the Order." Druella said.
"Yeah that sounds about right." Michael said quietly.
...
"It isn't proper for my Earl Marshal to be so sexually deprived. To become a proper member of Lescatie society, you must act like the other men here. Especially if you are to lead an army based upon lewdness. What inma will respect the commands of a Earl Marshal who doesn't live as they do?" Druella asked.
"Are you kidding me? Sherry's running me ragged! How much lewdness do you need?" Michael asked.
"All of it. When was the last time you did it with Searraigh?" Druella asked.
"Uh, it was around..." Michael started to say.
"Too long." Druella said.
"But you didn't let me answer!" Michael argued.
"Doesn't matter. If it's been longer than five minutes, it's been too long." Druella said.
"I've been sitting here with you longer than five minutes!" Michael argued.
"Searraigh should be under the table, sucking your dick right now." Druella countered.
"She's trying to stop those federales from coming here to Lescatie!" Michael argued.
"Which is exactly why we should create a royal harem immediately. While Searraigh is on some quest, another could be attending to your needs. You will be provided women of the finest stock, with only the best traits from which to birth perfect children." Druella insisted.
"I said no!" Michael said.
"I detest that word! You do understand the dark knights will think less of you? They'll know, they can sense when was the last time you did it!" Druella argued.
She paused, as her own words sank in.
"For that matter, why has it been so long since you last did it?" Druella asked.
Michael shrugged.
"That's intolerable! Sign the contract and we'll fix it!" Druella insisted.
"I'm going to say that word you don't like." Michael said.
She reached across the table and took his hand.
"I would consider it a great personal favor, a favor to the fourth princess of the demon realms, if you signed that contract!" Druella urged.
"And I thought you were willing to negotiate contracts." Michael countered.
She took the scroll and opened it, and raked her eyes across it.
"I'll double the pay. No. Triple. And I'll pay a hefty sum for every child you produce." Druella insisted.
"Money can't buy love." Michael said.
"Can't it? I have a whole city of people who would gladly hand over every coin they have for what I'm trying to give you. Humans offer themselves up, surrendering everything they have just for a few coins. Before you met Searraigh, could you have honestly said otherwise?" Druella suggested.
"That's not real love. It's pretend love. I refuse. Period. If you keep pushing it, I'll get up and leave." Michael warned.
...
"Then I shall not push it any further. I value your friendship, even if we disagree." Druella relented.
"You'll just have to wait for Sherry to get pregnant. I refuse to cheat on her." Michael said.
Druella sighed.
...
"His continued resistance makes me want to cast all of my lust spells on him at once. But if I did that, he would probably go insane." Druella thought.
...
"It's obvious he does not truly understand inma yet." Druella thought, disappointed.
...
"Perhaps I should take him to a white mage. That would fix him right up." Druella thought.
...
"So... there is another matter we could discuss. One I feel should be pleasant for both of us." Druella said.
"Okay, shoot." Michael said.
He took a sip of his increasingly cold tea.
"I've commissioned a display to be created that recounts the story of the second battle of Lescatie. I was hoping you would be willing to donate something to put on display, since you played such a large part of the battle." Druella said.
"What kind of display are we talking about? What do you need?" Michael asked.
"Perhaps it would be easier to show you." Druella said.
*CrackleWHOOSH!
The teleported to another part of the mansion that Michael had never seen before. It was a long dark room that reminded him of Druella's throne room, but without the beautiful windows. It was illuminated solely from magical lanterns. Filling the room was countless warded glass cases of all shapes and sizes, some small, some large, and some as tall as Michael. Druella escorted him down the rows of warded cases, and peered through the glass at the items on display.
"It's a museum!" Michael remarked.
"Yes. A museum dedicated to the history of the inma who live here. I commissioned it as soon as I became mistress. For if history is not preserved, who will remember it?" Druella asked.
"Aren't you immortal?" Michael asked.
"I am, but once you get old enough, things start slipping your mind. It's helpful to have reminders of memories long past. Such as this..." Druella said.
She gestured to a specific warded glass case, and Michael looked inside. It was a half constructed display, with a diorama at the bottom depicting the second battle of Lescatie. Both the city itself and the infamous night battle were depicted. At the top of the display case was a variety of exquisitely done hand drawings and magically created fairths. Many people were depicted, some of which Michael didn't know personally. All heroes who had fought valiantly to defend the city, long before Michael ever showed up.
"I need to remember I played a small part in this fight. I only showed up at the very end." Michael thought.
There was a picture of Druella standing on the wall, fighting side by side with her knights. Next to that was a picture of the damage to the wall, and those brave masons who were struggling to repair it. A whole portion of the display was dedicated to the masons, a choice that Michael agreed with.
"If it weren't for them, the walls would have fallen down." Michael thought.
It wasn't until the end quarter of the display before an image with Michael appeared. The first fairth was of the hill to the west of Lescatie, where Michael had started his sniper attack on the Order. As Michael looked at that picture and was reminded of that encounter, he realized that the fear the Order knights must have felt was probably very similar to the fear he felt just the other day. Druella smiled when she saw that fairth getting Michael's closest scrutiny.
"I made that fairth. It's what I saw when your Duster crested the hill while fleeing the Order calvary. That image lingered in my mind, and I knew it must be preserved for all time. If only you could have heard the cheering when we knew our mysterious savior was still alive." Druella explained.
"Really?" Michael asked, surprised.
"Truthfully! Your arrival, despite being sudden and suspicious, brought great hope to all the defenders of the city. The book will talk about it." Druella said.
"There's a book too?!" Michael exclaimed.
"Yes. Although, it has a long way to go before being published. I wish to recount all the details as accurately as possible. Both good... and bad." Druella said.
Druella pointed to one of the other fairths, which depicted Druella's memory of when Michael came charging out of the darkness with a rifle in his hands and a thermal optic over his eye. It was quite the frightening picture, and it clearly showed just how startled and frightened Druella had been in that moment. It depicted Michael as a sort of nightmare monster leaping out of the darkness to rip out her throat. The thermal optic was very prominent in the scene, looking like some sort of technological terror. The AK74 glistened in the moonlight, like the tip of a lance.
...
The next fairth showed in stunning detail how Michael got pummeled nearly to death by the dark knights protecting Druella. It showed him as he drew his Beretta with an angry bloodied face. The muzzle flash was very prominent in the center of the fairth.
...
And the third and final picture in the group was of Michael sitting on the ground with blood dripping from his head and a smoking Beretta limply hanging from his hand. The dark knights clustered around the dead body of the assassin. In the picture, the assassin was depicted as a frightening shadowy figure with a wicked wavy dagger. It was accurate down to the last detail, with an artistic flair that attempted to convey the emotions from that instant in time. Michael looked closely, and he saw tears in the eyes of some people in the scene. They stood over Michael, mourning what they had just done.
"Well... I have to give you credit for not trying to sugar coat things." Michael said.
"We're not interested in telling half truths and manipulated viewpoints. We'll let the Order do that. This place is only intended to show fact. And the fact is... we made a horrible mistake that night. To this day, I still feel pain in my heart when I think about it." Druella said mournfully.
"It's not the first time I've had my ass beat, and it won't be the last. Just let it go." Michael said softly.
...
"Letting it go is going to be difficult. I have difficulty sleeping sometimes." Druella thought.
...
"Now... over here we have a few artifacts we found from the battlefield." Druella said.
Michael's eyes followed her pointing finger. Inside the display case was an array of fired rifle casings, pistol castings, shot shell hulls, fragments of grenades and grenade spoons, the discharged LAW tube, and several recovered projectiles.
"Wow, you guys actually went around and picked all that crap up?" Michael marveled.
"At first we thought you might want it back, but one of your knights explained these things are considered disposable. So we brought it here to be in the display." Druella explained.
"So it looks like you have plenty of my stuff to show people. Why do you need any more?" Michael asked.
"Look to the display behind you, and you shall have your answer." Druella said.
Michael turned and peeked inside the display. It was of similar construction to the one he had been looking at, except it was portraying a very different battle. Displayed prominently in the center of the display... was Sherry's old sword. Or more accurate to say, the very same sword Wilmarina had used to capture Lescatie and turn it into a demon realm. The display was depicting the first battle of Lescatie.
"We asked for it back because we wished to return it to its place of honor. Henceforth, this blade will stand as a testament to the struggles the knights of Lescatie have faced." Druella said.
...
The wheels turned in Michael's head.
...
"You want my AK... don't you?" Michael asked.
"Since you offered..." Druella quipped.
Michael started chuckling.
"It means that much to you huh?" Michael asked.
"It does. Everyone who was present at that battle remembers your weapon. It's iconic. Some even thought we would certainly have lost the battle if not for that weapon." Druella explained.
Michael's memory flashed back to the time when some desperate dark knights tried breaking into the Duster to get at the AK laying in the seat. They had no idea how it worked, but they were desperate to save themselves.
"I don't have it with me right now this very moment, but I'll happily bring it by the next time I see Sherry. She's got it in her pocket dimension. It's yours as long as you want it. Coincidentally, I happen to have gotten my hands on a few new weapons to replace it." Michael said.
"Very good! Now... perhaps you would care to donate some other things to the museum?" Druella asked.
Michael chuckled again.
"Okay, what are you after?" Michael asked.
Druella's eyes trailed downwards, and Michael followed her eyes.
"You want... my boots?" Michael asked.
"Since you offered..." Druella said, smiling.
"No way. I'm not giving up my kicks." Michael said.
"But I would pay for a cobbler to make you new boots! It wouldn't be a problem. Pretty please? We're a very sentimental people." Druella said sweetly.
...
Michael signed deeply, and knelt down to start unlacing his boots.
"You have no idea how hard it is to get size 14 extra wides." Michael grumbled.
A few moments passed, and Michael pulled his boots off. Druella was smiling devilishly.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" Michael asked.
"Because I finally got you to kneel~" Druella quipped.
Michael jumped to his feet, and Druella burst out into uncontrolled laughter.
"Not that I want you to~" Druella added, laughing.
"That's not funny." Michael said dryly.
Druella took the boots, opened the display, and carefully placed them down next to a fairth of Michael wearing those same boots.
"Shall I summon the cobbler?" Druella asked.
"Nah." Michael said.
...
~Later~
...
A very barefoot Michael made his way out of the Lescatie family mansion, and down the streets towards home. A few people gave him funny looks along the way, but he managed to make it back to the house without too much trouble. When he got to the front door, he was forced to knock because the door was locked and he forgot his key. The ghost maid appeared, and immediately noticed his lack of footwear.
"Good day monsieur, may I... wh... where are your shoes!?" The ghost maid asked.
"Druella took them from me. It's no big deal." Michael reassured.
It just so happened that several people were passing by on the street as Michael was speaking, and all they heard was 'Druella took Michael's boots'. Thus the rumor started spreading.
"Do you have any other shoes monsieur?" The ghost maid asked.
"No, I'm going to have to go looking for new ones." Michael said.
Again, the people passing behind him in the street only heard 'Druella took Michael's boots, and now he doesn't have anything to wear'. Some of them began to look angry. Michael closed the door on his way inside, completely unaware of the good old fashioned angry French mob brewing outside.
...
"You don't own any other shoes monsieur?" The ghost maid asked.
"Oh sorry, that's not what I meant. I mean I need to go back to my other house to get my shoes. I just don't have spares right here." Michael said.
She nodded in understanding.
"Would you like some snacks or something to drink?" The ghost maid asked.
"No thanks, I just got done with drinks and snacks over at the mansion. But I'll be sticking around for a little while before heading back." Michael explained.
...
And with that, Michael was free to hunt down Akia. He found her in the room with the gateway, sitting in a chair and faithfully waiting for Michael's return.
"Hey there, sorry you couldn't come in the mansion with me. Good news, I fixed the problem with Druella." Michael said.
"That's good news master." Akia said.
Her eyes trailed downwards.
"Where is your footwear master?" Akia asked.
"Well Druella wanted them for some sort of museum. Don't ask me why. I swear, it's like everyone around here has a foot fetish or something. She asked nicely, so I donated them. I know it sounds dumb, but it is what it is." Michael said.
He rubbed one of his feet on his opposite ankle.
"Although I think I picked up a piece of glass on the way home." Michael added.
"I'm sorry master." Akia said.
"Ehh, it's fine. Any news about Sherry?" Michael asked.
"Yes master. Entity Searraigh has left to liquidate the government agency responsible for sending the unknown entity to Lescatie. She will return shortly." Akia said.
"Great, we'll hang around here for a while until she gets back." Michael said.
...
~Later~
...
Michael read a book while he waited for Sherry to finish her mission. Akia played with Michael's hacked PSP.
...
He let out a sigh.
"It's stuffy in here." Michael murmured.
"I believe it rained while we were away." Akia said.
"Too bad I missed it. I love the rain." Michael said.
Michael stood up and went for the nearby window, and slid it open.
*Sliiiiiide
"Hello dahling, I missed you~" Christine said seductively.
There, standing at the window with her elbows propped up on the window sill... was Christine the Dhampir.
"Gah!" Michael cried.
*SLAM!
He slammed the window in her face, and drew the blinds.
"Oh frack, oh frack!" Michael panicked.
He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to figure out what to do. Just then, he heard the front door open.
"Unknown entity has entered the house." Akia warned.
...
"Unknown entity is approaching rapidly!" Akia warned.
Christine burst into the room, her eyes wild and crazy. Her hair was a mess, and her traveling clothes were torn. It looked like she had been through hell and back. Michael drew his Beretta, and Akia deployed her blaster. Christine skidded to a halt. Her eyes landed on Akia.
"Who's that? Your second wife? You two timing son of a bitch!" Christine sobbed.
"Get out of my house you psycho!" Michael shot.
"No! I've chased you all across this land between Lescatie and Fort Chell, and I'm not giving you up!" Christine exclaimed.
Michael's eyes filled with fear.
"Shit! She knows about Fort Chell! She... she could follow me back to Arizona, and then there's no telling what Sherry will do!" Michael thought.
"Get out of my house or I'll kill you where you stand!" Michael warned angrily.
It was a lie. He wouldn't actually kill her. He couldn't bring himself to do that. But he hoped to scare her off. The problem was... she saw right through it.
"Nope~ I'm not going anywhere. Why don't you just be a good boy and put it..." Christine tried to say.
*PEW!
Akia shot Christine in the face, and she flopped over like a ragdoll. Michael advanced with his Beretta at the ready, and knelt down next to the unconscious dhampir.
"She's out like a light. Good job Akia." Michael said.
"Who is this entity?" Akia asked.
"This is Christine... a rapist kidnapper." Michael said.
"Rapist kidnapper?" Akia questioned.
"That's right. She kidnapped me, and tried to rape me when I first came here to Lescatie. She said she was going to hold me for ransom from Sherry!" Michael explained.
...
He eyed Akia up sideways. Despite having little emotion on her face, Michael could tell she was pissed. The biggest clue was a very slight twitch in her eye. It seemed as if Akia was on his side regarding Christine. It gave Michael a glimmer of hope.
"You told me that you waited thousands of years to be put to use. Did you mean that?" Michael asked.
"Yes master. My purpose is to serve you." Akia said.
"I don't want to kill her. I want her as far away from me as possible. Get rid of her." Michael commanded
"Yes master." Akia said.
She bent down and picked up Christine as if she were as light as a thanksgiving turkey, and then she headed for the door.
"I'll be waiting for you in Arizona! Don't tell anyone about this! Not a soul!" Michael said in hushed tones.
"Yes master." Akia said.
And with that, she quickly left the house. Michael took that opportunity to quietly and quickly exit through the gateway before anyone started asking questions. The ghost maid never knew what happened. All she found was an empty room, and a window jammed shut.
...
~Later~
...
Michael found himself stepping through the gateway, and reappearing back in Fort Chell. Stavish and two MPs were waiting for him.
"Hello sir. I was just about to come get you." Stavish said.
She paused, her eyebrows furrowing.
"Is something wrong?" Stavish asked.
"Everything's fine. Any news on this end?" Michael asked.
"Yeah. The mistress just got back, and she's freaking out over something. She keeps asking for you. I think she expected you to be at the theater when she got back." Stavish said.
"Oh, well it must be important then." Michael said.
They hurried through the portal, and appeared back on earth. As soon as they arrived, Michael clutched his belly.
"Sir?" Stavish questioned.
"Oh... shit... on fire..." Michael moaned.
...
~Meanwhile, Nearby~
...
Sherry was in the middle of a conversation with someone at the theater, when she trailed off mid sentence.
"Mistress?" An inma asked.
"He's back." Sherry murmured.
"Who's back?" An inma asked.
Sherry ignored her, and turned to hurry deeper into the theater. Michael had just stepped through the portal with Stavish.
*SNAP!
Sherry cast a spell, and Michael teleported across the room to her arms. They collapsed on the ground in a tangle of arms and legs. He barely had a chance to draw a breath before she jabbed her wet succubus tongue in his mouth. Her hips started dry humping against his pelvis.
*CrackleWHOOSH!
The two of them disappeared in a flash of crimson, leaving Stavish and a dozen stunned witnesses behind.
"That poor guy didn't have time to piss his pants." Stavish muttered.
.
..
...
*POMF!
Michael landed on their bed in the apartment, with Sherry on top.
"Sherry... I'm burning up... make it stop... please..." Michael begged.
*SCHRIP
Sherry ripped his pants open, and mounted him like a wild animal. They didn't stop screwing until late that night.
...
..
.
~The Next Morning~
.
..
...
*Grooooooan
Michael slowly woke up to the sight of morning light streaming in the window. Sherry was curled up next to him, awake and looking at him with those crimson eyes of hers.
"That's how I feel when you go away." Sherry said softly.
"What?" Michael asked.
"Last night. The burning feeling. That's what I feel when you're away from me. It's loneliness." Sherry explained.
"That... but..." Michael stammered.
"You asked me to do something, and I did it, but that is the cost. Even a few minutes wait is torture for me." Sherry explained.
She leaned in and kissed him, briefly sliding her long tongue into his mouth.
"Now... tell me about your shoes." Sherry said softly.
"Wha?" Michael asked.
"Your shoes. I stripped off all your other clothes, but you weren't wearing shoes. Would you care to explain?" Sherry asked again.
...
A mischievous idea popped up in Michael's head, and he decided to screw with Sherry a little.
...
"I got robbed when I went to Lescatie." Michael said.
"WHAT?! WHY!? WHO?! HOW?!" Sherry demanded.
"I have no idea. She just suddenly demanded I give her my boots." Michael said.
"So it was an INMA?! What kind of an inma steals a man's boots?! What did she look like?!" Sherry demanded.
"She was a succubus about your height, wearing a tight leather bodice and a half skirt. Oh and she had little eye of Lilith jewels all over her clothes." Michael recounted.
Sherry's eyes narrowed to slits.
"A dark knight. What else?" Sherry growled.
"She also had white hair, white wings, and a white tail." Michael added.
...
..
.
"What?" Sherry asked quietly.
Michael started laughing, which made Sherry look very confused. Technically nothing he had said was a lie, so she didn't catch his deception until he started laughing about it. A smile formed on her lips.
"You little trickster! You really had me for a moment there! Now what did you do with your boots?" Sherry asked kindly.
"I wasn't joking. Druella really did take them." Michael said.
Her smile was gone in a nanosecond.
"Why would mistress Druella take your boots?!" Sherry demanded.
"Because she wanted them for a museum display. She's constructing a display for the second battle of Lescatie. I donated them, and I also promised to donate that AK." Michael said.
Sherry thought about it for a moment, and then slowly started nodding her head.
"I understand. Whew! I thought the mistress did something bad for a moment there! You... didn't play that trick on anyone else, did you?" Sherry asked.
"Oh no, just you. Actually, I think the only person who knows about it is that ghost maid." Michael said, smiling.
...
~Meanwhile, in Lescatie~
...
*BOOM!
A dark knight burst into Druella's sleeping chambers, just as she was getting up that morning.
"Mistress! The people... they're revolting!" The guard exclaimed.
"Don't say that about our people! They're not revolting, they're beautiful~" Druella chastised.
"No mistress, I don't mean that kind of revolting! I mean the kind where they're swarming the mansion! They're very angry!" The dark knight explained frantically.
"That's just silly. Why would they revolt against me? I've been a fine leader for them, fixing their economy and bringing them wealth. Everyone loves me!" Druella argued.
*CRASH!
A woman's high heeled shoe flew through her bedroom window.
...
~Meanwhile, in Arizona~
...
*POP
"There we go, I got the glass out. Now I'll just wipe your feet down, and you'll be... oh... oh dear! You're bleeding a lot!" Sherry fretted.
"Looks like that glass was pretty deep in there." Michael said.
*Whooooosh~
Sherry cast a healing spell, and closed up the bleeding hole. Then she wiped up the blood.
"What possessed you to give her the boots immediately, and not wait until later when you had a replacement pair on hand?" Sherry asked.
"I wanted to see if I could get away with it." Michael said, grinning devilishly.
"You little prankster. It must have caused quite a stir in Lescatie seeing the Earl Marshal walking around barefoot. Inma take their footwear very seriously." Sherry chuckled.
"I didn't get much more than a couple odd stares. It didn't seem like they cared that much." Michael said.
"Go back a second time without shoes, and you'll get the amusing reaction you seek." Sherry said.
"Heh... okay. But I'd still like to go order some new boots online today." Michael said.
"Of course. Anything your heart desires, you shall have." Sherry said.
...
..
.
"I noticed Akia did not return with you. Where might she be?" Sherry asked.
"Oh I have her working on a little project around Lescatie." Michael lied.
It wasn't a blatant lie, but it was definitely an attempt to conceal the truth. Sherry caught it immediately.
"I...see. Tis a shame." Sherry said evenly.
"But I have some good news though! I signed that treaty with Druella. We're now officially allied with Lescatie." Michael added.
"That's fantastic news! It's about time you signed that treaty you fool!" Sherry exclaimed.
"Uh... I can't tell if you're happy or mad at me." Michael said dryly.
"Neither. I am content." Sherry said.
...
So the duo got dressed and started their morning like usual. They ate breakfast, and Michael hopped on the computer to order new boots with Sherry hovering over his shoulder.
"And you like these boots?" Sherry asked.
"Yeah. They fit really well, and they last a long time. It's hard to get my size, so this is the only place I can find them." Michael said.
He added one pair to his cart.
"I see it says they have eight pairs. Buy all of them." Sherry said.
"Uh... are you sure?" Michael asked.
"Yes. All of them. You say it's hard to find your size. I shant let you ever walk barefoot again for the rest of your life." Sherry said.
"Even when I'm pulling a prank?" Michael asked.
"Well... I suppose that's okay." Sherry relented.
...
She tapped his shoulder firmly.
"You buy all of them. Now." Sherry insisted forcefully.
"Okay okay. Chill." Michael said.
Sherry walked out of the room, and left Michael to order the boots with their debit card. Within a few minutes, she returned carrying all of Michael's shoes in her arms. She dropped them on the floor, and then instructed Michael to swivel the chair around so she could get at his feet.
"We're going to take a little peek, and see what you've been wearing. Now... what are these?" Sherry asked.
She held up a pair of New Balance running shoes.
"I got those on a discount rack at big 5 back in 2011." Michael explained.
"This is 2019. You've worn these shoes for eight years?" Sherry questioned.
"Yeah, that sounds right. I like them." Michael said, shrugging.
She stuck her hand in the left shoe, and poked her finger through a hole.
"I really like them." Michael emphasized.
"Too bad, they're going away." Sherry said dryly.
She tossed them in the lab trash can, and picked up another pair of shoes. It was Michael's PF Fliers.
"I really liked a movie called The Sandlot, so I got a pair of the shoes. I saved up a long time to get them, they weren't cheap." Michael explained.
"And how long have you worn these shoes?" Sherry asked.
"...four years." Michael said reluctantly.
*Fwish!
The PF Fliers ended up in the trash, right along with the previous pair.
"Now what are these things?" Sherry asked.
"Flip flops. Or uh... sandals." Michael said.
"You're not a monk. No sandals for you." Sherry insisted.
*FWISH!
She aggressively threw them in the trash. That was all she had brought with her.
"So where are the rest of your shoes? In the closet?" Sherry asked.
"No, you just threw away every single pair of shoes I own." Michael said dryly.
"Surely you jest." Sherry insisted.
"I don't jest, and don't call my Shirley." Michael said.
*Snort
*Snickersnicker
"Hehehe, that's funny~" Sherry chuckled.
Michael leaned over and fished his PF Fliers out of the trash.
"I'll just hold onto these a little bit longer, until I get something new. Okay?" Michael suggested.
"Very well. It's better than nothing I suppose." Sherry relented.
And just like that, Michael and Sherry were ready to start their day. With his old faithful PF Fliers strapped on, and his old faithful AK74 within reach, they made their way back to the theater on 5th and B.
...
..
*CrackleWHOOSH!
Michael and Sherry appeared in the theater, near the actual portal. Mackenzie the radio operator happened to be passing by.
"Hey Mack, where's Stavish?" Michael asked.
"She's through there sir, I think she's with our new intel officer." Mackenzie said.
She pointed off to one of the side doors that used to be for Employees Only. Michael thanked the radio operator, and headed into the room. Inside was a large conference table, their 'War Room' so to speak. Sure enough, Stavish and another woman Michael hadn't ever met yet were sitting at the table.
"Perfect timing sir. And you too mistress." Stavish said.
"Mornin' Stavish. And who might you be?" Michael asked nicely.
The stranger in question was very interesting to Michael's eye. It was a slender but athletic woman of Asian descent, wearing a style of uniform that Michael didn't immediately recognize. She was obviously a soldier from another country. She rose up from her seat and bowed.
"Ohayou gozaimasu Collins-san, I am Nito-rikui Sakia, of the Japan Self Defense Force." Sakia said politely.
Michael awkwardly bowed back. Sherry looked on in amusement.
"It's a pleasure you meet you... um... no-toe-riker?" Michael said, uncertain.
To her credit, Sakia burst into light laughter. Apparently Stavish had warned her beforehand that Michael was terrible at pronouncing things.
"It means First Lieutenant, sir." Stavish said.
"Oh! Well it's a pleasure meeting you Lieutenant. This is my wife..." Michael started.
"I am Knight Searraigh, a pleasure to meet you." Sherry said.
She bowed gracefully, far better than Michael had just done.
"What's a JSDF doing in Arizona?" Michael asked nicely.
Sakia shot Stavish a confused look, and Stavish returned it with an equally confused look.
"I'm in Arizona? What's... Arizona? I thought I was in America?" Sakia said, confused.
Stavish facepalmed.
"Arizona is a state inside the United States. It's like how Japan has prefectures." Michael explained casually.
"Ehhhhhhhhhh?!" Sakia exclaimed, shocked.
She clapped her hands together and bowed her head slightly.
"Apologies. I should have payed better attention in geography." Sakia said.
"Apologies for not pronouncing your language properly." Michael said.
So with everything smoothed over, and everyone on good terms with each other, their briefing was able to begin. Stavish started by sliding Michael a pair of manila folders. One was thin, and one was rather hefty.
*Sliiiiiiiide
"We've been pouring over all the data that Akia gave us, and we determined the sniper was definitely holding a fake passport. He wasn't from the UK. Turns out you were right." Stavish said.
"Whew! That's a relief! So... I take it he came from the same place the last guys came from?" Michael asked.
"Yep. It's all in the folder." Stavish said.
He glanced briefly into the folder, and shut it before Sherry could peek. Then he slid it back across the table, drawing a pout out of Sherry. It all just served to confirm suspicions that Michael already held.
"And what's this other file about?" Michael asked.
"It's the dossier of the guy who snuck through the portal." Stavish said.
Michael opened the folder and spent several minutes studying it. Right at the front of the folder was a picture of a stereotypical bureaucrat. Sakia watched his reactions very closely.
...
"I thought for sure it was the federales who sent the guy. Is this for real? Now the UN are after us?" Michael asked.
"The fed asked for help since they basically became the mistress's chew toy. They don't have much left to throw at us." Stavish said.
Michael slowly nodded as he looked through the folder. There were copies of emails sent back and forth, written transcripts of phone calls, records of UN meetings discussing the issue, and even the receipt for the plane ticket to the United States. It seemed the US government was really rattled by Sherry's creation of the portal. Far more rattled than anyone could have guessed. They couldn't stop Sherry with just the resources of the United States, so they got the United Nations involved. Thus the diplomat they sent to Druella.
"The slimy little bastards were trying to drive a wedge between us and Druella! They're trying to keep dark knights off this planet!" Michael exclaimed.
"It's just as we thought, but it was the wrong perps." Stavish said.
Sherry rubbed her eyes, as if she had a headache.
"Would someone be so kind as to explain who exactly is attacking us? I keep hearing all these names thrown around. Federales, UN, Cartel. Who is the enemy?" Sherry asked.
"The entire planet basically. It's us verses the world." Michael said.
"Eventually they're going to start working together." Stavish said.
"Even Japan has been asked to help stop the yokai." Sakia said.
"I'm sure China will take a shot at us soon enough. It's a matter of time." Michael said.
...
"Now as for that guy the UN sent..." Stavish asked.
"He's spending some time in... well... Druella threw him in jail." Michael said evasively.
Sherry raised an eyebrow.
"Jail? Can't say I feel too bad about that. Now how do we stop this from ever happening again?" Stavish asked.
"It doesn't matter. Druella and I worked out a deal, and she won't be giving the suits the time of day. She'll only talk to me." Michael said.
...
Michael thumbed through the folder some more, analyzing the information inside.
"This is incredibly detailed and well written." Michael said.
"Thank you Collins-san." Sakia said, smiling.
"Sakia was attached to the Japanese Defense Intelligence Headquarters in the Directorate of Signal Intelligence. It's her job to write this stuff." Stavish explained.
"Oh really? Signal intelligence? So you dealt with electronic warfare? What was your specialty?" Michael asked.
"I.. what's the word... analyze? I analyze electronic data for intelligence, and flag important data for Directorate of Programs. Most of my work was monitoring North Korea." Sakia explained.
"And how did you end up here?" Michael asked.
"I was brought here to work with the D.E.A., but I turned into a yokai. Now my government won't let me go home." Sakia explained mournfully.
"You're welcome here as long as you need dear. I won't see one of my sisters turned out into the cold." Sherry reassured.
"Are you sure? I am a soldier from another country. Don't Americans... what is the word... distrust?" Sakia asked.
"We're allies." Michael and Stavish said at the same time.
She seemed startled by their immediate answer.
"The US and Japan hasn't had hostile relations since long before we were born. That and you were brought here for peaceful intentions, and got stuck here by no fault of your own." Michael said.
"It's not like you're that sniper that tried to kill us the other day." Stavish added.
"And you're an inma. That alone ends the discussion." Michael added.
"I am in your debt." Sakia said humbly.
Michael smiled and nodded, and turned to Stavish.
"Make sure she's got three hots and a cot. I don't care what uniform she's wearing, she's one of us now. And make sure she draws the appropriate pay." Michael said.
"Yes sir!" Stavish said enthusiastically.
"Pay! Oh no, that's not needed..." Sakia politely tried to say.
"Why not? You're working aren't you? You made this intelligence report. You're going to get paid. And if that bothers you, then you can cover the tab at the bar next Saturday." Michael said.
She smiled widely.
"Yes sir." Sakia said.
...
"I have a good feeling about this one. Not that I'm some sort of expert on judging people, but she seems like good people. Stavish seems to feel the same way. Hopefully I'll get the chance to make friends." Michael thought.
...
"Have you been to the other side of the portal yet?" Michael asked.
Sakia shook her head side to side.
"Well then why don't we go? It's very pretty on the other side." Michael offered kindly.
She smiled and nodded. They all got up out of their chairs. It was right around then when Michael discovered just how short Sakia was. Michael towered over her when they stood side by side, and her eyes grew ever wider as they trailed upwards. Of course that in of itself wasn't unusual. Michael was the tallest person in the room by far. For Sakia though, she might as well been looking at Mt Fuji.
"Haaaaaaaiiiii?" Sakia gasped.
She put her hand on the top of her head, and drew an invisible line towards Michael. It landed somewhere right below his pecs and at the top of his abs. Sakia was very short, even shorter than most average Japanese citizens.
"How did you get so big?!" Sakia asked, shocked.
"Beef, beans, and whiskey." Michael quipped.
"He's a corn fed boy." Stavish drawled.
"Yup." Michael said, grinning.
"Corn... fed?" Sakia asked, confused.
"We're just teasing. I'm tall because that's just the way I am. I didn't do anything special." Michael said.
Sakia placed her foot next to Michael's PF Fliers, comparing their shoe size. She compared their hand size too. Each comparison clearly outlined just how huge Michael was in comparison.
"Are there a lot of Americans like you?" Sakia asked.
"No. Hey specialist, what would you say the average men's shoe size is in the states? Ten?" Michael asked.
"Ten or eleven." Stavish said.
"I'm a size 14... extra wide. I'm not sure how that compares to shoe sizes in Japan, but let that give you a rough idea." Michael said.
Sakia nodded in understanding. With all that out of the way, the group headed for the door.
"Speaking of beef, beans, and whiskey... we should throw a barbecue." Stavish suggested.
"Hell yeah!" Michael cheered.
"Ooooohhhhh! That sounds good! I've never eaten American barbecue before!" Sakia said excitedly.
"You're in for a hell of a treat then." Stavish said.
...
~Later~
...
The four of them made their way through the portal, and into Fort Chell. The moment they stepped through, Sakia let out a very amazed coo. Even with all the buildings popping up, the other world was a beautiful place. It had a mystic quality to it.
*Click
She pulled out her phone and took a picture. Everyone chuckled.
"Yeah, a whole lot of us were doing that when we first got here." Stavish said.
Stavish tugged her uniform straight.
"If you'll excuse me sir." Stavish said.
"Dismissed." Michael said.
Stavish snapped to attention without saluting (combat zone), and marched off.
"Hey, I'm starting to get the hang of this whole military thing." Michael said.
Stavish heard him, and chuckled as she marched around the corner of a building.
"Alright, so we'd better go see Druella and give her that donation." Michael said.
"You're going to see Druella? Right now?" Sakia asked excitedly.
"Yep. Feel free to come along if you want." Michael said.
"Uhm uhm! Yah!" Sakia said enthusiastically.
...
They went through the Quonset hut, past the radio room, and into the gateway. After reappearing in the Lescatie house, once again Sakia was in awe.
"Pretty neat huh? Druella gave it to me when I helped out during the last battle of Lescatie." Michael said.
Sherry scoffed.
"He's so humble. Helped out? He saved mistress Druella's life, and saved the entire city from being conquered!" Sherry exclaimed.
"Shush, don't brag." Michael chastised.
"Hmmp." Sherry scoffed.
...
They made their way through the house, and into the streets of Lescatie. Sakia was taking pictures left and right, before pausing and reconsidering what she was doing.
"Is it acceptable to take pictures sir?" Sakia asked.
Michael shot her a surprised look. Sakia was trying to get a measure of just what was acceptable, and what wasn't in the new world. She didn't want to upset anyone.
"Of course! Why can't you? Snap away!" Michael said cheerfully.
...
"So Sakia, where are you from in Japan?" Michael asked.
"Ichigaya. It's the eastern part of Tokyo." Sakia said.
"Oh, well that's a city anyone recognizes. Very cool! Maybe someday I'l go visit, and you can show me around." Michael said cheerfully.
She nodded, smiling.
"And you? Where are you from? Arizona?" Sakia asked.
"Guilty as charged. I'll show you around as soon as I get the chance." Michael said.
...
They walked along the streets of Lescatie, heading in the general direction of the Lescatie Family Mansion. But as they walked, Sherry started to become nervous.
"Why are there so few people on the street?" Sherry questioned.
"I noticed that too. Where is everyone?" Michael questioned.
Sakia eyed the streets and alleyways around them. Her phone quickly and quietly slipped back into her pocket as she switched out of tourist mode and into JSDF soldier mode. Michael fingered the AK hanging from his shoulder, and Sherry checked that her sword was in place.
"I wonder if the Order has come back. People would certainly shelter in their homes if a battle were about to ensue." Sherry reasoned.
"Or maybe Druella is making some sort of public announcement?" Michael guessed.
"That's certainly more likely. If that were the case, everyone would be at the mansion to hear her words." Sherry reasoned.
So they hurried to the mansion, passing countless empty buildings and shops along the way. They rounded a corner, and found everyone was crowded around the mansion. The trio breathed a sigh of relief, and came in behind the crowd. Several of the people were holding handmade signs, which they waved in the air. It looked a lot like a protest, but Michael couldn't understand what was written on the signs. It was written in the native Lescatian... aka French.
...
One of the 'protesters' noticed Sherry, and shoved a few signs in her hands. Sherry passed one off to Michael and one to Sakia.
"What do you suppose it says?" Michael asked.
"I have no idea. I never did learn much of the Lescastian tongue. It's a beautiful language, but it makes my head hurt to learn." Sherry said.
"They only taught us Japanese and English in my school." Sakia said.
"And I know jack diddly about French. So... maybe Druella raised their taxes too much?" Michael reasoned.
"It's possible, but Druella tends to favor lower taxes. Maybe there's another wine shortage? The city protested the last time that happened." Sherry reasoned.
"What did Druella do about it?" Michael asked.
"She released the exquisite Lescatie family wine reserves to the public, and she imported thousands of gallons from Dragonia. They loved her for that." Sherry recalled.
"Hmm... sounds right for the French." Michael murmured.
He was still staring at the protest sign in his hands. On it was written the words 'Les lignes parallèles'.
"Paralleles... parallel? What does lignes mean?" Michael wondered.
"I know that one. It means lines." Sherry explained.
...
"So it says parallel lines? What in the world could that mean?" Sherry asked.
"Let's find out." Michael said.
So he tapped on the shoulder of one of the protesters, a lovely blonde haired succubus lady wearing a beret and a feminine French coat.
"Excuse me ma'am, what are you protesting?" Michael asked nicely.
She turned, took one look at Michael, and her eyes went wide.
"C'est monsieur Collins!" The Lescastian exclaimed loudly.
A hundred pairs of eyes all turned towards Michael. He expected to see anger on their faces, but all he saw was first surprise, and that surprise turned into joy.
*GRAB!
The crowd grabbed him and yanked him into the sea of bodies. He let out a yelp as he disappeared amongst the fine dresses and velvety wings of the succubii. They pushed him to the front of the crowd, squeezing him through like toothpaste. They were packed in there like sardines, and there wasn't much room for a big Irishman like him. At one point or another, he felt his AK slip off his shoulder.
"Hey wait! Give that back!" Michael exclaimed.
Amongst the sea of people, he couldn't track where it went. It just evaporated. Some random Lescastian who had probably never held a firearm in her life suddenly found herself in the possession of a fully loaded AK74. Images of what Sherry had done to their bedroom wall flashed through Michael's mind as he was carried off by the sea of undulating bodies.
...
He wound up at the front of the crowd, where he was deposited on his back. The Lescastians grabbed his ankles and peered closely at the soles of his PF Fliers. It was immediately obvious they weren't pleased. They started shouting in French. Then the worst thing ever happened.
*BANG!
Michael felt his heart sink. Somewhere amongst the crowd... an AK74 discharged. He knew that sound. It was very distinctive. Images of an innocent Lescastian inma being hurt popped into his head. But much to his shock, the crowd cheered.
*BANG!
*BANG BANG BANG!
Every time the rifle went off, the crowd cheered. Michael managed to scramble to his feet, which provided him the height needed to see the distinctive muzzle of the AK74 pointing skywards, away from the crowd.
*BANG!
"RAAAAAAH!" The crowd cheered.
By some miracle, the Lescastian who had ended up with his rifle had enough sense to point it in a safe direction. Or it was completely by chance. Either way, Michael wanted that rifle back before someone's head got blown off. Sherry was still at the back of the crowd, surrounded by people who were asking her a million questions. He shouted towards her, but she couldn't hear over the gunshots and cheering. He tried going through the crowd, but a dozen arms held him back. One of the Lescastians tried to kiss him, and another tried to grope him.
"No! I don't want to play! Give me back my damn rifle! No poly-view francy, or however the hell it's pronounced!" Michael exclaimed.
It was then that Michael saw a familiar figure moving through the crowd. Sakia squirted past the people as if they weren't even there. Her small frame was just barely thin enough to squeeze between the much larger Lescatian ladies. Her path drew a straight line towards that AK. Before long, Michael could see her reach and confront the inma with the rifle. She said something, and the inma replied, but Michael couldn't hear what.
*SNATCH!
Sakia lashed out and snatched the rifle away by force, knocked the magazine free, and cleared the chamber all in one smooth motion. The situation was diffused, and Michael sighed in relief. Sakia turned and gave Michael a thumbs up, just as the crowd pushed him deeper into the Lescatie Family Mansion.
...
..
.
Michael found himself deposited in front of Druella's throne, where the people of Lescatie bowed in respect despite their current anger. A dozen guards with pikes guarded Druella from anyone who might get their feathers a little too ruffled.
"Lord Collins, I find you at the head of an angry mob. Care to explain?" Druella asked.
"I have absolutely no idea what's going on. I came here to visit you, and I got caught up in this mess." Michael explained.
"Then I shall explain it to you. The beautiful people of Lescatie, for some strange reason, believe that I, the all kind and gentle Mistress Druella, purposefully stole the shoes of my Earl Marshal. Do you have any ideas how such an awful rumor started?" Druella asked dangerously.
"I uh... uh oh." Michael murmured.
"Uh oh? Is that all you can say?" Druella shot.
"I didn't do it on purpose! Someone must have overheard me talking! But I have no idea why everyone is freaking out!" Michael exclaimed.
*Sigh
Druella shook her head side to side.
"Do you know of the parallel lines Lord Collins? It is the mark your boots leave upon the ground wherever you tread. It's said that if one finds the parallel lines on their path, then surely dead Order lay ahead." Druella said.
"The panama soles." Michael muttered.
"Come again?" Druella asked.
"Panama soles. That's what they're called. Or tractor treads if you're a redneck like me. It never occurred to me that none of you people had ever seen rubber shoe soles before." Michael reasoned.
"It's why I wanted your boots for the museum in the first place. They are the first shoes from your world that have ever tread upon our soil." Druella said.
Michael turned towards the crowd of people.
"Ladies, listen up! This is all a big misunderstanding! Druella asked for my boots for her museum, and I happily donated them! She didn't steal anything! So please go back to your homes and let this protest end!" Michael called.
"What of the parallel lines monsieur?" A Lescastian asked.
"I bought some new boots, and they're identical to my old ones. I'm just waiting for them to arrive." Michael reassured.
The crowd erupted into cheer, the signs waved all over, and people began dancing and kissing each other. It turned into a flash party in an instant, and all the happy inma poured out of the throne room in search of wine and music. The city declared a holiday, and the issue was settled.
...
Michael sank to the ground, completely spent. Pretty soon the only people in the room were Michael, Druella, Sherry, Sakia, and some guards.
*Scuffscuff
A pair of well shined military dress shoes appeared in his field of view. Looking upwards, Sakia was offering him the AK. He took it. Sherry grabbed his wrist and helped him to his feet.
"Fantastic job Lieutenant." Michael said.
"Arigatou gozaimasu." Sakia said.
"Ah! A visitor from Zipangu! Konnichi wa!" Druella said kindly.
Sakia bowed at the waist, far more than she had bowed for Michael.
"Konnichi wa." Sakia said politely.
"I brought you the AK, but the locals fired it. I'm going to have to clean it first, or it'll rust." Michael said.
Druella slid forward on her throne.
"This I would like to see." Druella said.
"As would I." Sherry said.
"I've never seen the inside of this... er... Russian? I've never seen inside a Russian rifle before." Sakia said.
*SNAP
With the snap of Druella's fingers, maids were summoned with a table and chairs. Some sweet treats and tea were served for everyone other than Michael, who had his hands occupied with his work. Within seconds, he had the guts of the AK stripped out and laying on the table.
"So fast!" Sakia remarked.
"Yeah, AKs are easy to strip and clean. That's part of the reason why they're so popular." Michael said.
"I remember seeing you do this once during the second battle of Lescatie. So this is normal?" Druella asked.
"Yeah. It's like... oiling a sword so it doesn't get rusty." Michael said.
Sherry and Druella nodded in understanding.
...
So Michael worked on the rifle while they casually chatted around the table. Druella seemed especially interested in Sakia.
"Tell me dear, why do you conceal your true form?" Druella asked.
Michael looked up from what he was doing, curious to learn the answer to that very question.
"I need to use my hands." Sakia said simply.
"If it's alright to ask, just what kind of inma are you?" Michael asked.
"Kuroi karasu... erm... black bird?" Sakia said, uncertain.
"Black crow." Druella corrected.
"You know Japanese?" Michael asked.
"I know Zipanguese. Kuroi karasu means black crow. Meaning she's a Black Harpy." Druella explained.
"Ah, that makes sense. So when you're in your true form, your hands are actually wings." Michael said, nodding.
"It's exceedingly easy for harpies to hide their wings, even the weakest one can do it. Although..." Druella paused.
She leaned over and looked at Sakia's JSDF issue dress shoes.
"Hiding the talons is a little harder." Druella noted.
"Well it's obvious the Lieutenant didn't want to be out of uniform." Michael said.
Sakia nodded in agreement.
...
Michael continued cleaning the rifle, obsessing over every tiny little nook.
"That surplus 7n6 ammo is corrosive, which means it deposits salts all over the rifle when you fire it. Which will rust the hell out of it if you miss any. It's like dunking the rifle in salt water." Michael explained.
"You know a lot about guns." Sakia noted.
"Firearms. And yeah, I do. I field stripped and cleaned my first rifle when I was five years old." Michael said.
"I never touched a gun... er... firearm, until I joined the JSDF." Sakia said.
Michael paused and thought about it for a moment. The entire catalog of firearms he knew rolled past his brain like a giant internal rolodex, until he got to the entry that was marked 'Japanese military'.
"You trained with the Howa Type 89. I wouldn't mind adding one of those to my collection. Maybe someday." Michael said.
"Why?" Sakia asked.
"Because it's cool." Michael said, with a lop sided grin.
Sakia said nothing. She simply stared at him with unconvinced eyes.
...
"Okay to tell the honest truth, it's because I want to learn more about your people. You can learn a lot of things about people from the way they design their stuff." Michael explained.
"So buy a Toyota." Sakia said dryly.
"They're made in Georgetown Kentucky. But that's not the point. My point is... here we are sitting on another planet, in front of people who are alien to us, and we don't even understand ourselves yet." Michael countered.
Michael started assembling his AK.
*Click
*Clack
*CLICKCLACK
The rifle was assembled and placed down on the table. Sakia let out a long 'ehhhhhhhhh?' of amazement at how quickly Michael had finished the assembly.
"Your country and mine are friends now, and we've been friends for a long time. But how can we hope to maintain that friendship when we don't remember why we became friends in the first place, or really anything about each other? Ignorance breeds fear, which breeds hatred." Michael asked.
"Bravo!" Druella exclaimed.
Michael pushed the rifle across the table towards Druella.
"And that's why I support this museum. It breeds understanding." Michael said.
Druella picked up the rifle, and looked closely at it with her crimson eyes.
"To the future Order knight! May he look upon this weapon and never forget, but may he also eventually forgive." Druella declared.
...
..
.
~Later~
.
..
...
"And there it is, safe and sound on display. Here it will remain, untouched other than by the curators of this place." Druella said.
Inside the case was one AK74, one East German magazine pouch with four loaded magazines, one magazine in the rifle, and the appropriate cleaning kit. Michael gave the rifle one last good look, and sighed.
"Bye old friend." Michael said.
And he turned to walk away. Sherry followed him closely, holding his hand as he walked out of the room.
"Will you be okay?" Sherry asked.
"Yeah... it's just hard when a man loses his rifle." Michael said mournfully.
"I know how you feel, but it's for a good cause." Sherry said.
Sakia followed them out, shaking her head. She didn't understand how someone could become so emotional over a firearm. Druella remained in the museum for a moment, and reached inside the case to gently rest her fingers on the wood of the AK. The memory of the battle flashed through her mind, and she slowly nodded.
"I understand. This weapon is a part of him. It contains a small piece of his soul. Just like his Duster." Druella thought.
She closed the warded glass case tightly. That rifle would be preserved, soul fragment included, for the rest of time.
...
They wound up back in the throne room, where they sat back down at that same table from before. Michael was finally able to participate in the sweet treats and tea that everyone else was having.
"Well today was certainly dramatic." Michael said.
"Indeed it was. You... are going to get those boots, no?" Druella asked.
"I said I was. It's not a lie. They're exactly the same as what I had, but brand new." Michael said.
"I had him buy eight pairs. You wouldn't believe what sorry state his footwear was in! He had a pair of shoes that were eight years old!" Sherry interjected.
"My goodness! Weren't they all worn out?" Druella asked.
"They had huge holes which could fit multiple fingers through! I threw them straight into the waste!" Sherry exclaimed.
"I really liked that pair too..." Michael said, dejected.
...
Druella stared at Michael for several long moments.
...
"What?" Michael asked.
"If the people of Lescatie ever catch the Earl Marshal walking around with eight year old shoes with holes, they really will riot! I'll lose my head!" Druella exclaimed.
"Rest assured, I shall never allow that to happen." Sherry vowed.
"Good girl. I am pleased." Druella said.
Sherry shivered with delight.
"Would you like me to compensate you? It would be a trivial matter." Druella asked.
"If you keep throwing around money like that, you're going to end up broke." Michael said.
"If I go broke, I'll just go adventuring again. I'm sure I'll come back with a great haul of old world gold." Druella said.
"Oh! That's something sweetie and I haven't done yet! We should go dungeon crawling!" Sherry said excitedly.
Sakia's eyes went wide.
"That's real?!" Sakia asked.
"Of course. Don't you have dungeon crawling in your world?" Sherry asked.
"Not really. That's more of a thing you see in video games." Michael said.
"I spent all my time playing those games when I was little. They were so fun~" Sakia exclaimed.
"Diablo? Fallout 1 and 2? Final Fantasy? Secret of Mana?" Michael questioned.
"Kurono Torigā... eh... Chrono Trigger?" Sakia said.
"Hell yessssss..." Michael hissed, smiling.
...
"Maybe we'll all get the chance to go have an adventure, Stavish and her soldiers included. It'd be fun." Michael said.
"And we might find new and exciting magical items, or lost magitech!" Sherry said
"You might get a chance at an adventure a little sooner than you think." Druella said.
The three of them all turned towards Druella with surprised eyes. She took a sip from her chalice before continuing.
"I received a letter for you, and I was told to wait until the right time before I hand it over." Druella said.
"Right time? Who's it from?" Michael asked.
"My mother. She said to wait until you had become better acclimated to living in the demon realms." Druella said.
"Better acclimated? How so?" Michael asked.
"While you were putting the AK in the display at my museum, Searraigh secretly conveyed news that you are now resistant to thick demonic energy." Druella explained.
"I am?" Michael asked, surprised.
"Yes you are sweetie. Remember out little... magical accident?" Sherry reminded.
"Hehe~ Magical accident~" Druella said knowingly.
Michael shot Druella a look. She glanced away and tried to look innocent. Sakia also looked away and tried to look innocent. Michael had a sinking feeling that those three women had been gossiping behind his back while he had been distracted with the AK.
"I notice things sweetie. I'm a succubus. And one of the first things I've noticed is how much easier you've been breathing in the demon realms. It's been this way ever since the accident." Sherry explained.
"So you think something changed inside me?" Michael asked.
"Yes. You're closer to becoming an incubus, and the closer you get to changing... the easier living in the demon realms becomes. In reality, becoming an incubus is nothing more than shedding the shackle that makes it hard for humans to live in the demon realms." Druella explained.
"Eventually you become a higher being, capable of living off of our mana." Sherry interjected.
Michael nodded in understanding.
"So about that letter?" Michael reminded.
"Ah yes. Here it is." Druella said.
She held her hand out, and the letter teleported into her fingers. It was a black envelope, with a crimson wax seal bearing the eye of Lilith. It was addressed to Michael Collins, in crimson ink. Since Sherry was closest, Druella handed it to her so she could pass it around to Michael.
"Well? Open it up and let's hear what it has to say!" Michael said excitedly.
Sherry and Druella both gave him a funny look.
"It has your name on it. Only you can open it. What's wrong with you?" Sherry asked bluntly.
"This might be one of the most important messages you'll ever get in your life. Don't be so flippant." Druella chastised.
"Gees, you don't have to be so touchy." Michael grumbled.
So Michael took the letter and slid his finger under the flap. The wax seal popped off effortlessly, and dissolved into a puff of demonic energy. While he unfolded the paper to read it, everyone at the table leaned in closer out of anticipation.
"It's an invitation. Lilith wants me to visit her at the Royal Makai. She wishes to discuss matters of grave importance, but she didn't specify what." Michael said.
"Mother told me not to tell you this, but she's been waiting impatiently for you to sign the treaty between us. Something's disturbing her, but she wouldn't tell me what. She also told me that as soon as I deliver this letter, I'm to warn her that you're coming." Druella explained.
"I hope everything's okay. She seemed nice when I got to meet her that one time." Michael said.
"You... met the maou?" Sakia asked.
"The what?" Michael asked.
"The maou. The um... demon king?" Sakia asked.
"You mean maoyu. And yes, he met her." Sherry said.
Michael facepalmed.
"Wait... did Sherry just correct a Japanese on a Japanese word?" Michael thought.
...
"Searraigh my dear, I love you like my own. But you can't pronounce anything to save your life. You have been mispronouncing maou for years now. It's not maoyu, it's maou. Maoyu isn't even a real word." Druella said.
Sakia nodded in agreement. Sherry scoffed in annoyance. Michael's forehead collided with the table as his body was wracked with uncontrolled laughter.
"OKAY! You're never giving me shit about peanut no-air again! You hear me?" Michael exclaimed, laughing.
"It's Pinot Noir! Not peanut no-air!" Sherry exclaimed.
"What is peanut no-air?" Sakia asked.
"It's a type of wine. It's quite lovely. I'm having some right now." Druella said.
She took a sip of her chalice again.
"If I can't begrudge your poor pronunciation of such a simple thing, then I must insist you at least pronounce my full name correctly!" Sherry argued.
"What? Surely you jest! He can't pronounce your full name?! Is that why he always calls you Sherry?" Druella asked, shocked.
Michael looked Sherry right in the eye, clenched his fists, and opened his mouth.
"Searraigh Fontaine." Michael said.
Sherry gasped and clutched her heart.
"Don't do that so suddenly! You'll give me a heart attack, and I'll turn into a Wight! You don't want that!" Sherry exclaimed.
*Inhaaaaale
*Exhaaaale
"Okay, I'm ready. Now try that again." Sherry said.
"Searraigh Fontaine." Michael said.
Sherry gasped and clutched at her heart.
"Wait! I lied, I'm not ready to hear my name come from your lips!" Sherry exclaimed.
Michael sighed and shook his head.
"We have gotten off topic! We must leave for the Royal Makai as soon as possible!" Druella exclaimed.
"Yeah I get that, but can I actually survive there? Sure I can handle demonic energy a little bit better, but isn't that place supposed to be pretty hostile?" Michael asked.
"Hostile? I would never have thought to describe my childhood home as hostile." Druella said, blinking.
"Sorry, I didn't mean it that way. I meant hostile for humans. Not for inma. I'm sure it's wonderful for inma." Michael said.
"It's wonderful for everyone. It's a place of great beauty and happiness. Anything can be found there, all your heart's desires. It's the seat of all inma power, meant to be a good place for all to live. Many men live there." Druella said.
"Okay, I guess it'll be fine then." Michael said.
Sherry reached out and grabbed Michael's arm.
"With all due respect mistress, I believe you're painting too rosy of a picture. Yes, men do live there. And yes, there is nothing in the Royal Makai that could harm a human. But... humans who are taken there by their wives live in a perpetual state of feverish confusion, and have difficulty doing even the most basic of tasks thanks to the thick demonic energy in the air. It's like constantly suffocating, without the pain or discomfort." Sherry said.
"Silence thyself knight! If you frighten Michael away from the Royal Makai, then I shall grow angry with you!" Druella warned.
"Please forgive me mistress, but my husband should be given all the information. He is intelligent enough to decide for himself whether he is capable of surviving the trip to Lilith's throne." Sherry argued.
"One way or another, I'm going to try my absolute best to see Lilith in her castle. If I don't make it, I can always turn around and leave. It's not the end of the world." Michael said.
"Very well, I shall inform her of your pending arrival. Return to your world, and prepare yourself. I feel this meeting will change all our lives. It's a rare day when mother leaves the bed chambers." Druella said.
...
~Meanwhile, Elsewhere~
...
Far from the city of Lescatie, in an exotic land far to the west, stood a beautiful jade green hill surrounded by grass plains. That hill was very quiet, other than a few quail cooing nearby. Akia appeared at the top of that hill, carrying the still unconscious Christine. She looked left and right, and up at the sky, using all her sensors to accurately pinpoint her location on the planet down to a few inches.
"Prerequisite met. Initiating phase two." Akia said.
*Plop
Akia quite literally dumped the still unconscious Christine and all her gear onto the ground.
"Phase two complete. Returning to base." Akia said.
Akia turned to walk away. Before she had gone much more than a few steps, Christine woke up. The sudden impact with the ground had jostled her awake.
"What? Where am I? Where have you taken me!?" Christine cried.
Akia paused. She analyzed the orders that Michael had given her, and decided that it wasn't against his commands to answer her question. So Akia spun around and faced Christine directly.
"You are now on the other side of the world from where you were." Akia said.
Christine's eyes went wide in shock.
"Other side of the world... but why!? Why would you do this to me!?" Christine asked.
"Because master ordered it." Akia said.
Akia's next words weren't in her voice, but in the pre recorded voice of Michael.
"I want this woman as far away from me as possible." Akia mimicked.
It was undeniably Michael's voice. Hearing his voice again made Christine's heart flutter.
"Master requested that I deposit you as far away from him as possible. This is as far away as I am capable of going. I am incapable of space travel." Akia explained.
She turned to walk away once again, having decided that Christine's question had been answered sufficiently.
"Wait! Don't leave yet!" Christine wailed.
"Master is waiting for me to return." Akia said.
"Please, I'm begging you! Don't leave without me!" Christine pleaded.
Akia stopped again. Christine's pitiful begging had triggered the sympathetic part of Akia's programming. Without turning again, she spoke.
"Why does master consider you a threat?" Akia asked.
"I wish I knew! I don't want to hurt him, just be with him! I'm madly in love with that man, and it hurts every time he pushes me away! My body burns!" Christine said, choking.
Akia turned and faced her once more, and she saw the pain in Christine's eyes.
"When I first asked to become his wife, he lost his mind. I've never seen someone change like that before. It was as if something's wrong with his head!" Christine added.
"Master said you are a kidnapper and a rapist. Is this true?" Akia asked.
Christine's eyes fell.
"I... can't deny it. I did do that." Christine admitted.
"Goodbye." Akia said flatly.
"No wait! I love him! I made a mistake, and I'm sorry! I love him! I LOVE HIM!" Christine wailed.
Akia began to walk away once again.
"There is a village in that direction. You may find food and shelter there." Akia said.
She pointed to her right, but she kept walking. Christine fell to the ground in defeat and broke out in uncontrolled choking sobs. She wailed and gnashed her teeth, but Akia did not stop again.
...
~Later, Elsewhere~
...
Back in Arizona, Michael and Sherry were hard at work packing for their trip to the Royal Makai. And as they packed, they guessed at why they were being summoned by Lilith.
"Maybe she wishes to discuss the second battle of Lescatie?" Sherry reasoned.
"No, I don't think so. I think Lilith doesn't care much about Lescatie. She might want to talk about what happened with her daughter though." Michael said.
"It's possible. I imagine she's very pleased that you saved her life. Maybe she wishes to reward you?" Sherry guessed.
"Nono, I've had enough of that. A house I didn't want and a title I don't want. No thanks. No more rewards please. I'm good with a heartfelt 'thank you' and that's it." Michael said.
"I wouldn't be so hasty. You never know what Lilith might do. Maybe she'll permit the use of another drop of Lilith's Blood." Sherry said.
Michael did a double take.
"What the hell is that!?" Michael exclaimed.
"It's a special nectar from a flower that grows in Lilith's castle gardens. It only blooms once every decade." Sherry explained.
"Oh, okay that doesn't sound so bad. For a second I thought you meant a literal drop of Lilith's blood." Michael sighed in relief.
"Nono, I have no idea what a drop of Lilith's actual blood would do to a human. I don't think it's ever been tried. But this nectar has a unique power. It's the only thing that exists in the whole world that can instantly transform a human man into an incubus." Sherry explained.
Michael came to a rapid stop, his suitcase half filled.
"Instantly?" Michael asked.
"Instantly. I was granted one drop of the Lilith's blood when I was first sent to this world, which I used to coat the edge of my blade. But then I was forced to use that blade against someone else in self defense, so I was unable to turn you into an incubus." Sherry explained.
The wheels turned in Michael's head.
"Okay here's what we're going to do. If she offers it, we accept immediately. But we don't ask for it if she doesn't offer it. Agreed?" Michael asked.
"Agreed." Sherry said.
So he went back to packing, and he packed a little bit quicker than he had been packing before.
...
..
So they shoved all their stuff into Sherry's pocket dimension, and got ready to leave.
"We should take the Duster." Sherry said.
"What? Really? How come?" Michael asked.
"Because it rumbles and makes me wet, and I want to do donuts." Sherry said immediately.
A devilish smile slowly formed on Michael's face.
"How many people do you suppose we'll piss off if we did donuts right in the middle of Lescatie?" Michael asked.
"Who knows, who cares. Let's begin this adventure with style!" Sherry exclaimed.
..
...
So Michael found himself down at the Duster, checking the oil and doing a quick inspection before they started their trip. Sherry sat inside the car with the radio on, tuned to a local radio station.
"...And in other news, reports state that mass defections are occurring in all branches of the U.S. military. With little to no manpower left, the Dugan administration is helpless to stop the onslaught of monster girls sweeping the country."
"That's probably for the best, because of the public outcry over this so called 'monster girl crisis' as Washington has named it, has made Dugan's poll ratings plummet."
"The best thing Dugan could do now is to do nothing at all, and keep his mouth shut before he makes things worse for his administration. Monster girls are here to stay, and the public majority wants them here."
"Of course with that said, there have been reports of groups of Americans who have established monster free zones. People are resorting to vigilantism to keep the girls out of their communities. And further reports indicate the monsters are going to a lot of trouble to get inside those communities."
"Why are they going to that much trouble? Why don't they just pursue the millions of single men in the country that aren't guarding their communities at gun point? Why bother with the difficult ones?" Michael mused.
...
"Because that's not our way." A voice said.
Michael paused his work, without moving out of the engine compartment.
"You know... that sounded an awful lot like Druella." Michael said.
He straightened and looked to his right. Sure enough, there was Druella standing next to the Duster with two of her guards.
"And that sounded an awful lot like Michael Collins, although I can't tell for sure under all that grime on your face." Druella teased.
Michael instinctually reached up to wipe his face, but his hand was black and grimy. It just smeared it around.
"Nononono! Ahhhh! Now it's even worse!" Druella exclaimed.
...
So the next thing Michael knew, Druella was wiping off the grease stain from his face with a handkerchief.
"So... I guess you came all the way here to my world just to wipe old mopar grease off my face? Welcome to Arizona." Michael quipped.
"Oh stop~" Druella laughed.
Sherry slid out of the passenger door and rounded the car.
"Mistress, you need not bother yourself. I can clean him with magic." Sherry said.
"It's quite alright. I don't mind fussing over someone every once in a while. It's only natural." Druella said, smiling.
*wipewipewipe
"You gave yourself a greasy black eye." Druella said.
"Heh, like Petey from The Little Rascals." Michael chuckled.
*wipewipe
"There we go, all clean." Druella said, smiling.
"Thanks. Want a hug?" Michael asked, raising his greasy hands.
"EEK! NO!" Druella exclaimed, backing away.
Sherry giggled.
...
"Did you have a hard time getting here?" Michael asked.
"Oh no, not at all. I know magic tricks to walk among the people without being recognized. Although, the one named Sakia was very suspicious of a strange face in your lovely Fort Chell." Druella recalled.
"Her job is to be suspicious." Michael said.
"I do hope she was enjoying the welcome basket we gave her, and getting settled into her new home." Sherry interjected.
"Yeah." Michael said.
"Anyways... your world is amazing, far more than Searraigh could every convey. I wish to learn more about it." Druella said.
"When we have time?" Michael asked.
"Indeed, when we have the time. We must leave for the Royal Makai soon. Mother sent me a message. She's ready for you, and she asked me to bring you to her right away." Druella said.
"Then I guess I had better get this old jalopy running. You want to ride with us, or do you want to go on your own?" Michael asked.
"I'll go with you. My guards can return the way they came." Druella said.
She turned towards her guards.
"Searraigh will keep me company. You may go." Druella said.
They both bowed their heads in respect, and marched away. Just before they disappeared around the hedge across the street, they shimmered and transformed into a pair of seemingly ordinary American civilians.
"That's one hell of a disguise." Michael said.
"Isn't it?" Druella said.
...
Druella reached out and gently bopped Michael on the nose.
*Whoooooooooooooshhhhhhh
All the dirt and grime on his body crumbled and blew away.
"If you could do that, why'd you bother with the handkerchief?" Michael asked.
"For the same reason why we bother with the difficult humans. It's just the way we are." Druella said.
"I agree. Inma would always pursue the humans who resist the most." Sherry said.
Michael went to slam the hood shut.
"Fingers clear please." Michael said.
Sherry pulled her hand off the fender and stuck it behind her back.
*CLANG
The hood shut, and Michael pulled out his keys from his pocket.
"But why though? If someone really doesn't want to be in a relationship with an inma..." Michael asked.
"It's a lie. I've learned through the years that the ones who resist the most are the most lonely. They're angry and bitter over being alone, or they've been hurt in the past." Druella said.
"Again I agree. You would not believe the number of times I've seen men who fought tooth and nail to keep from becoming a husband, end up breaking down and thanking us when it was all over. They cry, and shake like little baby deer, and beg for forgiveness." Sherry explained.
"And of course we forgive them. We understand, nobody truly wants to be alone. It's against human nature. Inma must understand human nature better than the humans do if we're ever to love them." Druella said.
...
..
.
"Oh! Did you ever get those boots?" Druella asked.
"They're still being shipped." Michael explained.
"Ugh. Intolerable. Searraigh? Do something about it." Druella said.
"Yes mistress." Sherry said.
"Hey wait!" Michael started to say.
*CrackleWHOOSH!
Sherry disappeared in a flash of crimson. Druella snuggled up against Michael's arm.
"Now, would you be so kind as to escort me to Lescatie?" Druella asked sweetly.
"Yeah uh, sure. Here, you'll sit on this side." Michael said.
He escorted her to the passenger side of the Duster, and opened the door for her.
"Oh what a gentleman~" Druella cooed.
After closing the door on a seated Druella, he rounded the car and slid into the driver seat. The keys jingled as they slid smoothly into the ignition.
"How does this mekanism work?" Druella asked.
"To put it simply, you steer with this wheel. Down here are these three pedals. This one makes it go faster, this one makes it stop, and this one lets you shift gears. You use this shifter to select what gear you want." Michael explained.
"May I see how it works in action?" Druella asked.
"Sure. Just to warn you, it's a little loud. Don't be frightened." Michael warned.
"I won't." Druella said.
*Whirrwhirrwhirr
The 440 mopar faithfully spun over, and sputtered to life.
"Oooooh! My whole body vibrates!" Druella cooed.
"Yeah, that ol big block really does rumble. Here, so this is how you operate it." Michael said.
So he showed her the short and low of driving a stick shift. Clutch in, select a gear, and ease on the gas until they started rolling. He backed the car up, and then pulled right back into the same parking spot.
"Just like that. Get it?" Michael asked.
"Hmm... I believe so. Like this?" Druella asked.
*Grope
"Hey uh, that's not the shifter." Michael said nervously.
"Are you sure? It feels like a long hard shaft." Druella said seductively.
Michael picked her hand up out of his crotch, and placed it on the shifter.
"I liked the first one better." Druella said.
"You're going to make Sherry jealous." Michael said.
"She should be jealous. I have more talent in my little finger than she has in her whole body. I could have you writhing over there with a single touch." Druella said.
"I'm sure you do." Michael said, uncertain.
"Want me to show you?" Druella asked seductively.
"Another time please." Michael said.
...
..
.
There were several long minutes of silence in the car as Michael drove towards the theater on 5th and B. The radio played quietly in the background, but there wasn't any talking for an awkward amount of time. Druella finally broke the silence.
"Remember what we said about inma and stubborn men?" Druella asked.
"Yeah...?" Michael said, uncertain.
"You're just making us want to dote on you more and more. I think you actually want to play, but your humanity is holding you back." Druella said.
"Probably." Michael agreed.
"It's going to hold you back when you meet my mother as well. You must be prepared to act and respond to an inma, in an inma world. To do otherwise would be a disaster." Druella warned.
"Would you care to share an example?" Michael asked.
"There is a strong possibility that mother will be naked, and or having sex during the meeting." Druella said.
"And?" Michael asked.
"And... it would be wise to take it in stride. As far as inma are concerned, it's perfectly normal and expected behavior." Druella said.
"Couldn't care less. That sort of stuff doesn't bother me." Michael said.
"Yet you don't like a little lewd joke from me." Druella noted.
"Your lewd joke would have been funny if I weren't married." Michael said.
Druella immediately slid closer.
"So that means you enjoy such things?" Druella asked.
"Sure I do. What kind of guy wouldn't?" Michael asked.
"Ohhhhh... plenty enough. There are so many stuck up prudes in the Order, it drives me insane." Druella said.
...
She casually unbuttoned her top. Before long, a fine pair of lilim titties were hanging out for anyone to see. Michael noticed immediately.
"Your headlights are showing." Michael said.
"So they are~" Druella purred.
She caressed a finger down the side of her breast.
"And there's the high beams." Michael quipped.
"If you mean I'm turned on, well, I'll have you know that my natural resting state is turned on." Druella said, grinning devilishly.
"Well you'd better tuck those puppies in, because we're almost at the theater." Michael said.
"You haven't complimented me yet though." Druella pouted.
Michael glanced over briefly, not wanting to take his eyes off the road too long.
"They're perky." Michael complimented.
"Now touch them." Druella said.
...
"Come now, I don't bite. Not unless you enjoy that~" Druella said seductively.
She gently guided his hand up to her breasts.
"That's it, there you go. Not so hard, is it? I got rid of Searraigh on a silly errand just so you wouldn't feel shy. Humans were born to feel these things, and the greatest crime against humanity is denying yourself these simple feelings." Druella argued.
"I need to shift. Let go please." Michael asked nicely.
She released his wrist, and his hand went for the shifter. At the same time, her hand went to his bulge.
"She's just going to keep pestering me if I keep saying no, so... fine. Maybe this is all she'll do." Michael thought.
...
Druella's lesson continued even as they pulled up and got in behind a convoy of vehicles waiting to go through the portal.
"Why were you born with these feelings if you're just going to deny yourself? Just think of all the things inma can do that feel so wonderful. Wouldn't it be nice to just let it happen? It's just natural, and inma are in tune with that nature." Druella argued.
"I do let it happen... with Sherry." Michael said.
"That's good! That's a good start! However, there is so much more you're missing out. It breaks our hearts when we see humans hiding away behind walls, both real and imaginary. We just want to get the biggest hammer we can find and bash the walls to pieces." Druella explained.
"What do you want exactly? Why don't you get to the point?" Michael suggested.
"I'm asking you to be lazy. It's so much work throwing up all these walls, so why don't you relax and just let nature take its course?" Druella suggested.
She gave his package a gentle squeeze for emphasis.
"Sherry's wonderful, and she deserves my best effort. I'm not going to be lazy." Michael insisted.
*Sigh...
"Searraigh isn't even that good in bed. She's more of a knight than a lover." Druella muttered.
*CrackleWHOOSH!
Just then, Sherry returned. She teleported directly into the back seat. Sitting next to her on the seat was a very large cardboard shipping box.
"I found your boots sweetie! They were at mystical fortress called Fedex, and they didn't want to hand them over. But I managed!" Sherry said cheerfully.
"Fantastic job Searraigh!" Druella praised.
"Was someone speaking my name while I was gone? I sensed a tingle in the back of my mind." Sherry asked.
"Your husband was praising your efforts in the bed chambers." Druella said.
An expression of pure joy crossed Sherry's face.
"Oh sweetie, I love you so much~" Sherry cooed.
...
"Right! Your boots! I almost forgot!" Sherry exclaimed.
She tore open the box, and pulled out a pair of boots, which she plopped down onto the seat between Michael and Druella.
"Oh my, they look identical to your old ones!" Druella remarked.
She picked them up and looked them over closely. They were brand new, and had that classic milsurp smell to them. The inside of the tongue read size 14 extra wide, and spike protective. They were the classic Vietnam era jungle boots that were used by the US Military until the turn of the century.
"There's something about them, they just look so..." Druella trailed off.
"Sharp?" Michael suggested.
"That's exactly it. They look sharp, and they'll look even better on you. It's no wonder the people of Lescatie think they're so iconic." Druella said.
She fingered the brand new rubber soles.
"Panama soles. You take such a thing for granted, yet it's fascinating to me. Your world must be full of all sorts of fascinating things like this. I want to learn more!" Druella said.
"Oh it is mistress! They have something here called nylon, and they use it to make the most lovely stockings! And they also have the most lovely brasseries, and panties too!" Sherry recounted.
"And that where I nope out of this conversation." Michael said.
"Why? Because you were wearing bras and panties not too long ago?" Druella teased.
"Ugh." Michael groaned.
...
~Shortly Later~
...
The Duster pulled into the theater. He aimed it through the large entranceway, and down into the theater proper. Down the ramp he drove, and came to a stop behind the line of trucks still working their way through the portal. He rolled down his window.
"Hey Sakia! Hey hey hey!" Michael said cheerfully.
Sakia walked up to the driver window of the Duster, and raked her eyes across the car.
"Ehhhhhh? You drive a car like this? So nice!" Sakia complimented.
"Thanks, it's my baby. Anyhow... settling into that Quonset hut okay?" Michael asked.
"Uh uh! I like it! I feel very relaxed!" Sakia said cheerfully.
"That's good. Hey... if you're looking for a little slice of home, there's a place on the west side of town that sells tatami mats and futons." Michael said.
"Really?!" Sakia exclaimed.
"Yep! That's where I bought my futon. Here, I wrote down the address ahead of time." Michael said.
He passed her a 3x5 index card with the address.
"Maybe we'll all get the chance to have some drinks after I get back from the Royal Makai. I'm sure Stavish would like to go bar crawling." Michael suggested.
"Doumo arigatou~" Sakia said, smiling.
Druella leaned over and whispered a translation in Michael's ear.
"You're very welcome." Michael said, smiling.
He shifted the car into first gear, and rolled along to follow the line of waiting trucks. His arm popped out the window, and he waved goodbye to Sakia as the Duster rolled through the portal.
...
~Shortly Later~
...
*ThunkSQUEAK
Sherry deposited the Duster down in the streets of Lescatie while Michael pulled on his new boots.
"How do they fit?" Druella asked.
"Just fine. It's a little different than my old pair, but I'll break them in." Michael said.
"Excellent. I hope the people of Lescatie are pleased." Druella said.
"Well even if they aren't, I sure am. I love jungle boots." Michael said.
"We are ready to leave sweetie~" Sherry called.
"Alright, just a sec!" Michael called.
He finished lacing his boots, and then hurried over to the Duster. They all slid back inside the car, and got on their way.
"So Sherry, where do you suppose we should go to make our donuts?" Michael asked.
Druella gave Michael a funny look.
"Let's go to the square in front of the mansion. There's plenty of room there!" Sherry said excitedly.
"Hehehe~" Michael laughed evilly.
So he carefully navigated around the people, and got to the square. Sure enough, there was tons of room to make a ruckus. The Duster came to a halt right in the middle of the square, and a couple random strangers looked on in curiosity.
"So Druella... remember that title and house you gave me?" Michael asked.
"Of course." Druella said.
"And remember how you were talking about rewards and public recognition?" Michael asked.
"Yes..." Druella asked, suspicious.
"Well... I'm about to make you regret all of it. Here's how Americans have fun." Michael said.
He jammed the car into first, and revved the engine. Sherry got a firm grip on the seats in front of her.
"Here we go! Hold on!" Sherry cheered.
*BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
*BRABRABRAAAAAAAAA!
*SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAL
The ass end of the Duster spun around violently in circle after circle as Michael did donut after donut. Tire smoke flew into the air, the 440 mopar screamed, and Michael let out a good old fashioned rebel yell out the window.
"Yip yip YAAAHHHHAAAA!" Michael shouted.
"Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~" Sherry squealed.
Meanwhile, Druella's expressions went through a whole lot of changes. It started with complete shock, which turned into a smile, which went back to shock again, which turned into joyful squealing just like Sherry.
...
The Duster came to a halt when too many spectators started showing up in the square to safely continue.
"Alright, now that we got that out of our system, where do we go now?" Michael asked.
"We go to the Royal Makai." Druella said.
"Yeah I get that. But what direction? East? West? Where do we go from here?" Michael asked.
Both Sherry and Druella gave Michael a funny look.
"Wait... I think I know what you're asking. Take that street over there." Sherry said.
"Okay." Michael said.
So he drove the Duster down the street, leaving a very messy square behind him. Some inma came along, and used a spell to remove the tire marks. Several children chased after the Duster with smiles on their faces.
...
"We're here. Now what?" Michael asked.
"Take that street to the left." Sherry said.
...
"Now go straight, then right, then left again." Sherry said.
"Where the hell are we going? The gate is over there." Michael asked.
"We're not going to the gate. We're going to the gate." Druella said.
"What!?" Michael exclaimed.
"Hehehe, that's mean mistress~" Sherry giggled.
"I think he deserves it after waking up the dead with this loud mekanism of his." Druella joked.
"Yeah, I do~" Michael laughed.
"I mean that by the way. I saw several undead inma come out of a house." Druella said.
Michael chuckled.
...
So Michael finally found himself pulling into a street with a large number of people. They were all standing in line, waiting to get into a large and beautifully decorated building. It looked like some sort of medieval travel hub.
"And we're here. Go forward. I have the privilege to cut in front of everyone." Druella said.
Michael pulled forward, past the line of inma, until they arrived at the entrance to the transit hub. It was difficult to move, on account of the countless people going to and fro with luggage and freight goods. Countless dark knights marched in and out of the structure. Attached to the building was some sort of large hotel, which had a constant stream of people checking in and out at all hours of the day.
"This... is the nexus." Sherry said.
"The nexus?" Michael asked.
"It's a series of gateways between the major cities. We created them when the Order began intercepting point to point teleportation." Druella explained.
"The gateways can't be intercepted, but they require a lot of very difficult spells to create. Think of it as similar in scale to when I created the portal between your world and this world." Sherry said.
"They only go to the largest of cities or the most important of fortresses. Lescatie is the smallest city with a nexus gateway." Druella explained.
"But Lescatie is pretty damn huge! How big is the Royal Makai?" Michael asked.
Both women formed wide smiles.
"You'll see." They both said.
...
"Wait wait wait. Why didn't we just use this to get reinforcements when Lescatie was under attack?" Michael asked.
"When the Order draws close to the city, they can use magic to disrupt the nexus. They can't redirect it, but they can close it." Druella explained.
..
.
They pulled up to the building, and the dark knight guards began moving people out of the way. The overall setup of the building reminded Michael a lot of the theater on 5th and B. It was designed for vehicles to get in and out, namely freight wagons and carriages. The Duster fit in through the door nicely. As they passed the door, Michael noticed a sign that said something about a toll.
"There's a toll?" Michael asked.
"It takes a lot of mana to keep the nexus open, so there is indeed a mana toll. I'm sure Searraigh could pay it without even noticing, but most inma get rather fatigued after stepping through." Druella explained.
"That's why there's a hotel right here. The inma will travel with their husbands, and then immediately go straight to the hotel to refill their mana reserves." Sherry explained.
"So what's going to happen to me when we drive through there?" Michael asked.
"I don't want you to lose any of the demonic energy you've built up, because I don't want your transformation into an incubus to be delayed. So I'll cover the toll for the both of us. But I must touch you to pay it." Sherry said.
She reached forward and placed her hand against the nape of his neck.
"Like so." Sherry said.
"Cool. Alright then, let's do this." Michael said.
...
They pulled the Duster deeper inside, and people who were waiting in line got out of the way for Druella and party. Michael looked up at the gateway itself, his eyes filled with wonder. It looked similar to the one between Earth and the inma world, but it didn't show an image of what lay on the other side. Instead, it showed a dark tunnel with many branching side passages.
"Whoa... that's cool!" Michael exclaimed.
"I was sure you knew about it, since your automaton used it the other day." Druella said.
"She did!?" Michael asked, surprised.
"Indeed! You... didn't know?" Druella asked.
"No! What the heck is that girl doing?!" Michael answered truthfully.
...
"Why would Akia use the nexus? How did she even know about it? Wait... is she... literally trying to take Christine as far away from me as physically possible?!" Michael thought.
...
"You suddenly look very worried." Druella noted.
"I'm just wondering if Akia is going to be okay." Michael said truthfully.
"She has a nasty habit of running off and doing things without telling us." Sherry interjected.
"I see. That is troublesome." Druella said.
...
An inma serving as the gatekeeper walked up to the driver side of the Duster, and Michael leaned out the open window.
"We'd like to go to the Royal Makai please." Michael said.
The gatekeeper saw Druella sitting in the passenger seat, and that was all the encouragement she needed. Michael watched in fascination as the gatekeeper cast some sort of spell, and redirected the gateway like changing tracks on a railroad. The scary tunnel twisted and changed, until it showed a light at the end of the tunnel.
"You may enter. Enjoy your stay~!" The gatekeeper said cheerfully.
And with that, the three of them drove through the nexus, and into the great tunnel. Sherry gave Michael's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. Michael's head was on a swivel as he looked all around him.
"Where are we?" Michael asked.
"We're in a tunnel through the great void." Sherry said.
"How come this has a tunnel, and ours doesn't?" Michael asked.
"Because this nexus connects to many places. Think of it as like an intersection in a road. The more roads linking to the intersection, the larger the intersection must be. Don't worry though, it's perfectly safe. We've mastered this form of magic." Druella reassured.
"So if this tunnel didn't exist, we would be doomed to eternal purgatory in a void. Right?" Michael asked.
"Correct. But as I said, we are very safe right now. You're more likely to be sucked into the void while standing in your home in Lescatie than you are right now." Druella said.
"Which to be clear, has absolutely no chance of happening. If this tunnel were to fail right now, we would be spat out either in Lescatie or the Royal Makai, whichever is closer." Sherry added.
"Oh okay, I get it. Totally safe." Michael said, nodding.
...
They drove onwards, drawing closer to the light at the end of the tunnel. When they reached the end, they appeared in a room nearly identical to the one they had just left. The only difference was a different line of people waiting, and a different gatekeeper. Of course the gatekeeper and various travelers didn't know what to make of the Duster at first, but they saw Druella inside, which seemed to make them relax. The gatekeeper came over to the passenger window, and Druella flashed her a smile.
"Welcome home princess." The second gatekeeper said.
"It's good to be home!" Druella said cheerfully.
"I think that's the first time I've ever heard someone call you princess... besides myself." Michael said.
"That's because in the Royal Makai, I'm a princess. In Lescatie, I am a mistress." Druella said.
With that, the trio made their way out of the nexus... and Michael beheld the Royal Makai for the very first time.
...
"Whoooooooooooooaaaaaaa..." Michael exclaimed.
His eyes trailed upwards. The castle was situated on a tall mountain, which loomed high above the castle town. It was dark and mysterious, and surrounded by swirling clouds of demonic energy. The town itself looked like it was in the middle of a renaissance, with fantastical buildings and well dressed people. The buildings were clearly constructed with beauty in mind, with large arches on the doors, decorative windows and trim, and sculpted rooftops. It looked like something straight out of the Renaissance of England, which competed with the similar renaissance style in French themed Lescatie. Or it might have been something straight out of a Studio Ghibli movie. Michael was in too much awe to truly comprehend it. Just the scale alone was mind boggling.
...
Outside the walls of the castle town was a massive tentacle forest which stretched as far as the eye could see. A single road went through it, leading to the south. It was far enough away that the wagons and people traveling up and down the road looked like ants. Michael wondered how the people would be able to travel through the tentacle forest without getting molested. That's about as much information Michael was able to absorb before Druella and Sherry both started poking him with their long fingernails. His Duster was blocking foot traffic.
"Come Lord Collins, we must go to the castle. Now is not the time to gawk." Druella encouraged.
"We can't keep maoyu waiting." Sherry said.
"It's maou! MAOU!" Druella exclaimed.
"Maoyu?" Sherry asked.
"Meow?" Michael quipped.
Druella facepalmed.
...
..
.
So the two women guided Michael as he drove through the streets of the Royal Makai. They poked at him impatiently as he stopped the car and waited for a herd of holstaurs to cross the road. One of them stuck her tits in the driver window.
"Want to buy some fresh milk?" The holstaur asked.
"No thanks. Maybe another time." Michael said kindly.
The holstaur shrugged her shoulders and went on her way, her tits jiggling with every step she took. The whole herd followed along, a parade of wide birthing hips and huge boobs passing by the driver window.
"Wow... I like this place. The view is fantastic." Michael said in awe.
Sherry rubbed her own breasts.
"Not as fantastic as it is back here." Sherry said seductively.
"Or over here." Druella said, rubbing her own breasts.
"Hey I'm driving! No playing around!" Michael exclaimed.
...
..
.
The Duster came to a stop in a courtyard in front of the Royal Makai castle. Leaning into the steering wheel, he craned his head so he could see the highest part of the castle, but it was hidden behind the demonic energy clouds circling above. It was quite the sinister view.
"Sweetie... I don't think we should do donuts in this place." Sherry said softly.
"That's a big fat negative." Michael replied immediately.
"While it was fun, I agree. This is not the place." Druella said.
...
"I feel like this place should be dangerous, but I don't feel unsafe." Michael said.
"This place is only dangerous to male virgins." Druella said.
"Or prudes." Sherry said.
*Thunk
*Thunk
The three of them left the Duster, and turned to face the giant castle looming above them. Right around then Michael noticed the ever growing crowd of people gathering around the Duster. The sound of the 440 mopar had gathered a ton of attention, which was soon diverted straight towards Michael. They tried making their way through the crowd, but more and more people were pouring in to the area.
"Oh my, it seems you and your mekanism are just as popular as ever." Druella chuckled.
...
It didn't take long before some random succubus with a goofy hat grabbed Michael and kissed him.
"MMPH!" Michael cried, muffled.
Pulling away from his lips, she dragged her wet tongue up Michael's cheek until her plump kissable lips were near his ear. She exhaled seductively.
"Happy un-birthday~" The succubus said seductively.
And with that, she walked away. Michael stood there, his eyes as wide as hubcaps as he wiped his mouth.
"What is an un-birthday?" Sherry said.
"It a phrase that is popular in Wonderland. How strange, we don't often get visitors from Wonderland. Does that mean my sister is visiting?" Druella wondered.
...
..
.
"That castle is like a city of its own!" Michael exclaimed.
"It really does highlight the foolishness of the Order, don't you think?" Sherry asked.
"How so?" Michael asked.
"Well... the Order paints a narrative of the monster lord's castle being in the middle of an empty barren land with no life other than shambling beasts. They send heroes to storm the castle and kill Lilith. But as you can see, such a thing is foolishness." Sherry said.
"Even if the hero could get past the hundreds of miles of heavily patrolled dark demon realm, and pass through the tentacle forest, then they'd have to pass through the castle town. All these thirsty inma would love nothing more than to catch a hero." Druella explained.
"And assuming the hero could even get to the castle, he or she would have to fight through all the defenders, and force their way into the castle proper. The monster lord's finest wards defend the entrance, so it would be very difficult." Sherry said.
"Then the hero would have to search the castle, room by room. Each room has one or more thirsty inma, each a guest of mother's. It would take weeks just to check each room, and that's WITHOUT all the residents. Of course the rooms are filled with magic, so it's easy to lose your way." Druella said.
"And in that time, the collective armies of all inma everywhere could descend upon this place through the nexus, and the battle would be over for the hero in short order." Sherry said.
"We have turned many heroes over to our side. They too would come here and fight, and crush whoever the Order sent. Just Searraigh alone could do it, much less the likes of Wilmarina or my father." Druella said.
"So this is basically the world's most defended place, with the world's most defended woman." Michael said.
"Correct. And I haven't even gotten to the best part. Assuming the hero managed to overcome all those obstacles, there's still one last hurdle. Mother would flick her finger and send the hero flying like flicking a bug. He or she would probably wind up landing in the ocean several hundred miles away." Druella said.
"Or he would just turn into meat confetti, like the Grunt Birthday Party. POP... YAY!" Michael cheered.
"That probably wouldn't happen. Mother doesn't care to kill people. Besides, she did that to me once as a child, and it wasn't so terrible. I'm obviously still here." Druella said.
"What the hell did you have to do to get punted into the ocean a few hundred miles away by your own mother?" Michael asked, shocked.
"I didn't eat my vegetables." Druella said.
Michael mouthed an expletive.
...
"So what about your father? He was an Order Hero, but he managed to make it all the way to your mother?" Michael asked.
"That was a long time ago, before the city and the demon realms had grown so much. The Order might have won that day, but they made a mistake." Druella recalled.
"And what was that?" Michael asked.
"They sent a horndog on a quest to kill a succubus. After screwing every single inma who got in the way, he arrived in my mother's throne room. Once there, he used his sword upon her~" Druella recalled.
"His meat sword." Sherry interjected.
"Of course. What else would a guy do?" Michael quipped.
"What else indeed. Everything changed in the Order after that day. What resulted was a series of brutal purges, followed by new laws essentially outlawing any form of flirting. It's quite depressing." Druella said.
"It's like the Order is in the dark ages." Michael muttered.
"That's exactly right. It's a dark age, in the truest sense of the term." Druella said.
...
..
.
It took a long time to walk all the way to the castle entrance. It was fifty feet tall, with an arch of glowing symbols over it. Michael slowly raked his eyes across it.
"Speak friend, and enter." Michael murmured.
"What was that sweetie?" Druella asked.
"Nothing. Something from a book I read. So what's the story with this?" Michael asked.
"The inscription is a powerful ward spell. If anyone attempts to pass through this door while harboring hatred for inma, they will be crushed under the might of my mother's power." Druella said.
"Literally crushed. As in... splat." Sherry interjected.
"That seems pretty slick. I like that." Michael said.
"You like th.. wait! What're you doing?! You can't just walk through that door!" Druella exclaimed.
He ignored Druella and stepped inside the castle. As expected, absolutely nothing happened to him. The spell didn't trigger. He waited at the other side of the door as Druella and Sherry hurried after him.
"You're absolutely insane!" Druella exclaimed.
"Yup." Michael said casually.
...
Turning, Michael looked in awe at the massive entryway. The walls were black and glassy, as if it were made out of obsidian. Sharp pillars rose from the floor to the ceiling, holding up the massive ebony roof overhead. Everything was gothic, like something Sauron might have had in Lord of the Rings. It seemed very fitting, considering the appearance of the castle exterior. But while it seemed like it should be frightening, there was something about it that was welcoming and familiar. The Royal Makai castle was a place that was obviously intended to welcome guests.
"Welcome Lord Collins!"
Michael lowered his eyes from the ceiling to ground level. Standing before him, in two rows on either side of a long red carpet, was a company of a hundred maids. They had all greeted him in unison, and their skimpy maid outfits rode up on their behinds as they deeply bowed.
...
Michael was stunned speechless. He had no idea how to respond to what he was seeing. He wasn't even entirely sure it was real.
"Is the demonic energy screwing with my head?" Michael thought.
...
"Welcome home princess! Greetings knight!" The maids said in unison.
They broke formation, and quickly came towards the trio. Druella surrendered a scarf while Sherry gave up her sword. The maids tried to take Michael's jacket, but he resisted.
"It's okay miss, I'll hold onto this." Michael said kindly.
"Michael! Give her the coat!" Druella barked.
Michael jumped in surprise.
"Gees, what the hell!" Michael blurted.
"It is an insult to refuse their service. Hand over the coat right now, or leave." Druella demanded.
The maid began carefully peeling off Michael's leather bomber jacket, and then she bowed to him.
"We are at your service Lord Collins. It is our duty to see to all your needs, no matter how trivial. Everything from a cup of water to a full body massage is at your command. You needn't lift a finger." The maid said.
"I see. Thank you." Michael said evenly.
"The maou has commanded that the Royal Makai is to become a place of comfort and relaxation for all who visit, regardless of societal status. It is to show that the old Royal Makai is dead, where torture and misery were common. We are specially chosen to carry out this decree, and ensure that all guests are pampered thoroughly." The maid explained.
...
"We've come to see my mother." Druella said to the maid.
"Yes princess. We were told to expect you. However, Lilith is not yet ready to greet you or Lord Collins. We were told explicitly not to admit your party until she permitted it." The maid said.
"I see. Yes, I understand. Perhaps you could give Lord Collins a tour?" Druella suggested.
"Right this way please." The maid said cheerfully.
So a small group of maids lead Michael and party through the castle, passing countless doors along the way. Michael didn't have to ask, he already knew what many of those doors were. The Royal Makai castle was known for having a large number of bedrooms. But as Michael was soon to find out, the castle didn't consist of JUST bedrooms.
"Our first stop here is the great library! Contained inside is the collective works of every author known to have ever existed on this world." The maid said.
"Really? Every author?" Michael asked.
"Yes sire! Lilith commissioned a thousand librarians to construct and maintain the library, back when she first ascended to the throne. She believes that knowledge is one of the most valuable resources to any civilization." The maid explained.
"She would be correct about that." Michael said, nodding.
"The library is special. It is permeated with magic to preserve the works contained within from the ravages of time. Coincidentally, it also preserves the librarians. So if you were to meet one, she would most certainly be thousands of years old. They were my instructors as a child." Druella explained.
"So as long as you're inside that room, you'll never grow old?" Michael asked.
"That's right. You wouldn't age a single day, so long as you're inside." Druella confirmed.
"To be perfectly honest, you probably won't age just by standing anywhere in the vicinty of that library. Anywhere inside the castle would do." The maid added.
Michael looked longingly through the door, towards the rows of bookshelves. Of all the things he had ever seen during his time on Sherry's world, that library was the most appealing.
"Come Michael, let us continue." Druella said.
"Okay..." Michael said reluctantly.
He looked back longingly towards the library as they walked onwards.
...
"Our next stop is the Sabbath headquarters. They are..." The maid said.
"I'm familiar with them. What's next on the tour?" Michael said casually.
Sherry, Druella, and the maids all blinked at Michael in confusion.
"But sire, wouldn't you like to see the great baphomet?" The maid said meekly.
"Please convey my apologies, we don't have the time to properly meet right now." Michael lied.
He started walking away, whether they wanted to go or not.
...
"I like monster girls, but I draw the line at pedophilia. Full stop." Michael thought.
...
Sherry hurried after him and caught his hand, and pressed her lips against his ear so she could whisper without being overheard.
"Sweetie... the Sabbath is the squeaky wheel that gets the grease." Sherry whispered.
...
"What?" Michael asked.
"While the Sabbath is at the center of most magic and magitech research in the demon realms, nobody is required to participate in their particular... kinks. Simply put, titty fucks are too much fun, and nobody wants to rub one off on a washboard. Nobody cares about their beliefs, including me. Especially me." Sherry explained quietly.
...
"Opal is a member of the Sabbath, and you never had a problem being around her. And I took you to that classroom." Sherry added quietly.
"Okay okay, I get it. Let's go see the Sabbath." Michael relented.
...
..
.
The very first thing Michael noticed when he walked inside the Sabbath headquarters was a distinct lack of lolis. In fact, the very first woman he laid eyes on was full grown, had tits bigger than Sherry, and an ass that wouldn't quit. It brought him an immediate sense of relief.
...
That relief didn't last long.
...
"HUSBAND!" A woman shouted.
Michael whirled his head around, and damn near jumped out of his skin. There was a Wurm barreling straight towards him down a long hallway, batting people out of the way as she slithered.
"Sherry!" Michael exclaimed.
"Yes sweetie~?" Sherry asked casually.
"Do something!" Michael cried.
He started backing up as the Wurm slithered closer.
"Do something about what?" Sherry asked casually.
Just as the Wurm was about to grab Michael, he grabbed Sherry and threw her towards the approaching earth dragon. Then he ducked into the nearest convenient door, and slammed it behind him. The Wurm quickly raked her eyes over Sherry's body.
"You not man! Get out of way!" The Wurm spat.
She shoved Sherry aside, and ripped the door off its hinges. It led to a hallway with fifty more doors. Not knowing where Michael went, the Wurm started patrolling up and down the hallway in search for a male to mate with, be it Michael or anyone else.
...
~Meanwhile~
...
"Good afternoon sir!" A voice said.
Michael turned around, and found a cute little teenaged succubus looking up at him with cheerful eyes.
"Uh hey. Sorry to barge in to... wherever I am." Michael said apologetically.
"It's absolutely fine sir. Would you care to participate in my research?" The loli succubus asked.
"I uh... well..." Michael stammered, uncertain what to say.
"It's just a simple survey." The loli succubus said.
The wheels quickly turned in Michael's head. On one hand, there was a Wurm waiting for him outside. He had no illusions that Sherry or anyone else would be able to keep her away. After all, Wurms were a species known for knocking down entire forests and blasting huge boulders apart in pursuit of men. On the other hand, he could take a survey from some inma he had never met before. The choice was obvious.
...
So before long, Michael found himself sitting down in what appeared to be some sort of classroom. It reminded him a lot of the classroom he visited in Lescatie a while back. The posters on the walls and the classroom materials were nearly identical. There were rows of desks and chairs, all of which were empty other than the one Michael was sitting in. The loli succubus, who was evidently in charge of whatever program he had just discovered, plopped a huge scroll down in front of him.
"Try to answer to the best of your ability, but don't linger on questions you don't understand. There is a time limit." The loli succubus instructed.
Michael eyed the scroll incredulously.
"You... do know how to read?" The loli succubus asked.
"Of course. Doesn't everyone?" Michael asked.
"Not in my experience." The loli succubus said.
He reached into his pocket and pulled out his favorite Parker ballpoint pen.
"Alright, let's do this." Michael said.
...
~Meanwhile, in the Hallway~
...
"Now where did that fool man go?" Druella asked.
"I sense him over here, behind these doors." Sherry said.
"These?! Are you sure?!" Druella asked.
"Yes mistress. Is that... a problem?" Sherry asked, uncertain.
Druella began laughing hysterically.
"Mistress?" Sherry questioned.
"Oh Michael, how do you get into these situations? HAHAHAHA!" Druella laughed.
She caught Sherry's arm and guided her over to a row of seats in the hallway.
"We wait! I want to see how this plays out." Druella said, giggling.
...
~Meanwhile, back in the Classroom~
...
"Okay miss, I'm done." Michael said.
"So soon? You have a lot of time left." The loli succubus said.
"Well you said to skip the ones I don't understand. And boy... I sure as heck don't understand a few. So why waste time?" Michael suggested.
The young succubus took the scroll from Michael, fully expecting to see the majority of the questions skipped. However, she was in for quite a shock.
"He... answered ALL of them! All but the magic questions, but who cares about that! And... and... and... they're all CORRECT!" The loli succubus thought.
...
The young succubus noticed Michael had filled out his own name at the top of the test, like any good college student would do.
"Michael Collins! THE Michael Collins! Mistress Druella must have brought him here. Of course she would! He's here to see the Maou! I need to handle this very carefully. She will be disappointed if I fail her." The loli succubus thought.
...
"It seemed less like a survey and more like an IQ test. Gee, when was the last time I took one of those? High school? I scored 135 way back then. I wonder what it is today?" Michael thought.
...
"Well... um... moving on." The loli succubus said, flustered.
So Michael was escorted out of the classroom, down a short hallway, and into another separate room. There were two chairs, a writing table along one wall, a padded table, and shelves of herbs and tinctures. It looked like a medieval doctor's office.
"Sit on the table please, and take off your shirt." The loli succubus said.
"What are you going to do?" Michael asked.
"I'm going to give you a checkup, and see how healthy you are. Do not fret, I am a white mage. And I'm married." The loli succubus said.
"Oh! Well that changes things!" Michael said cheerfully.
He happily sat on the table and stripped off his shirt. The young succubus brought a magelight closer, and inspected him from the waist up.
"You're in fine shape. Did you get any help, or is this how you are naturally?" The loli succubus asked.
"Well, to be honest, I had some help from my wife. I used to be... overweight." Michael said.
"Overweight? That's certainly not an issue." The loli succubus said.
"It is when you want to get laid." Michael quipped.
She giggled.
"Human women are vain. No inma would turn away a man just because he's fat. Some inma go out of their way to pick out the meatier men, orcs and holstaurs for example." The loli succubus said.
She turned and wrote down something on a scroll laid out on the workbench.
"Is capable of surviving lean times..." The loli succubus murmured.
"What was that?" Michael asked.
"Oh nothing. I have a nasty habit of talking to myself when I write things down." The loli succubus explained.
*Scribblescribblescribble
"Good! Now, let's get to the checkup." The loli succubus said.
She turned and gently pushed Michael down to the laying position, and then laid her ear directly on his chest.
"Deep breaths. Good. It seems your lungs and heart are working well. Do you have any complaints?" The loli succubus asked.
"Well, I used to live in pretty lousy conditions. I was sick all the time back then. But now I'm just fine. No complaints." Michael said.
"Ah~ I see~" The loli succubus said.
She turned once again towards the scroll, and wrote something new down.
"Recovered from hostile environment very well..." The loli succubus murmured.
...
"And your age?" The loli succubus asked.
"Twenty five." Michael said.
She glanced sideways at him, disappointment written on her face.
"So old? You look young for your age." The loli succubus said.
"Ah well... let me correct myself. In my world, I'm twenty five years old. That's because a year is shorter in my world. There's 365 days in one year. In your calendar, I'm a bit over 17. Maybe 18 because my birthday is coming up." Michael explained.
"Ah~ I see~. Thank you for clearing that up." The loli succubus said.
She turned and wrote that information down on the scroll.
"I wonder if that Wurm is gone yet. This is starting to drag on a little." Michael thought impatiently.
...
..
.
Shortly thereafter, the loli white mage began using the pharmomancy spell known as Check-up. Of course Michael understood what it was, and he watched in fascination as the white mage went about her duties and checked him for injuries by gently caressing his chest with magic coated fingers.
"So just how effective is that spell? I've seen it used before, but I don't know a lot about it." Michael asked.
"You broke your left wrist when you were younger." The loli succubus said instantly.
"Wow, you nailed it! I broke my wrist in my freshman year of high school! You really can pick up something that that?" Michael asked, amazed.
"Of course. I've been a white mage for a very, very long time." The loli succubus said.
...
After a few minutes of using the check-up spell, she turned back to her scroll and wrote down a whole lot of stuff. There wasn't anything unusual, other than some comments about the quality of his spirit energy. By all accounts, he was a healthy adult human.
"So... am I alright doc?" Michael asked.
She lowered her quill pen, and turned around in her seat.
"You're fine. No... you're better than fine, you're a perfect example of human health." The loli succubus said.
"You can thank my wife for that." Michael said.
"Demonic energy can do a lot of things, but someone who already has good traits will turn out stronger than one who doesn't. You would have to become an incubus to go beyond your natural predisposition." The loli succubus explained.
"Huh. And I always thought that demonic energy really could do anything. It seems like the body doesn't matter." Michael said.
"It does. Oh how it does. I've spent five thousand years studying human males, and I've seen countless men come through here and take the same tests as you. Trust me, the body matters." The loli succubus said.
She slid out of her chair, and opened the door.
"Come, there is one last place I must take you. Then you will be done." The loli succubus said.
So Michael followed her while pulling his shirt back on.
...
As they walked down a long hallway together, Michael's curiosity got the better of him.
"So what exactly are you studying here?" Michael asked.
"We have discovered that all living creatures contain a blueprint within their bodies which dictates their features. How smart they are, how handsome or ugly they are, how strong and fast, so on so on." The loli succubus explained.
"So you're studying genetics." Michael said casually.
She skidded to a halt.
"You know of this?!" The loli succubus asked, shocked.
"Sure. Everyone does where I'm from. I'm just surprised you know about it." Michael said.
Her eyes glimmered happily.
"I first learned of it centuries ago, while attempting to heal a man with a birth defect. I used my magic to peer deep into his body, and my senses had finally become attuned enough to detect the blueprints. Ever since, I have dedicated my life to the study of this subject. And I found financial support here in the Sabbath." The loli succubus explained.
"How were you able to convince anyone that what you were seeing was real?" Michael asked.
She laughed.
"Convince? Hardly. To this day, nobody believes me. You're the first to give my work any validation. However, there is no denying one fact..." The loli succubus said.
"What's that?" Michael asked.
"When people of high ability mate with others of high ability, their offspring are likely to be of high ability. Even the most dullard must admit that." The loli succubus said.
She opened a door, and gestured inside the dark room.
"Go ahead, go inside~" The loli succubus said, smiling.
His eyes adjusted to the lower level of light. An all too familiar Wurm rose up from a large mattress on the floor. Her dragon body uncoiled, and she slithered towards the door.
"I think there's been some sort of mistake!" Michael said, backing away.
"This woman is of a superior breed, and will ensure your spawn are as beautiful as they are powerful." The loli succubus said.
"You've been talking to Druella, haven't you!?" Michael asked.
"Yes I have." The loli succubus said, matter of fact.
*CRASH!
The wurm shot out of the room like a missile, and pinned Michael against the wall. Part of the wall crumbled from the impact, yet somehow Michael was unharmed.
"Gah! NO NO NONO!" Michael panicked.
He squirmed and struggled, but it was completely hopeless. There was no way any human man could overpower a dragon. She had him in a death grip, and she wasn't about to let him go.
"Stop!" The wurm exclaimed.
Michael froze, his eyes wide in fright.
"Stop wiggling, or gonna hurt. Don't wanna hurt." The wurm said.
The wurm was very gentle to Michael, which contrasted with the reputation her species was known for. They'd knock down entire forests and blast apart boulders in search of a male, but they would completely invert their attitude and treat the male himself with the utmost care and tenderness. The last thing they wanted to do was knock down or blast apart the male they went to so much trouble to capture. In that way, it turned out wurms were even more gentle than the most gentle of succubii, because they knew they were so powerful. So when her squishy bits rubbed against his body, he couldn't help but turn red in the cheeks.
*Gasp~
"Please don't..." Michael panted.
She ignored his pleas, and fondled him freely. Her long tongue trailed up his neck, across his chin, and into his mouth.
*MMPH!
Michael cried out, her tongue choking off his words. It lasted what seemed like an instant, but in reality the kiss was several long moments.
*Pwah~
She stared deeply into his eyes, and he saw... disappointment.
"Taken." The wurm said.
She uncoiled from around his body, and let him slowly sink to the ground. Then she slithered down the hallway, and rounded a corner.
...
"Of course. Of all the wurms I could have come up with, I had to get one who's the greedy type!" The loli succubus griped.
"You mean... she... ?" Michael stammered.
"That's right. She doesn't want to share a man. How unfortunate." The loli succubus said.
Michael couldn't believe his luck. He slid upwards against the wall, getting ready to haul ass out of there.
"Thanks, it's been swell. Wish you all the best on your research! Peace!" Michael blurted.
He turned and hauled ass down the hallway.
"Wait! I have a hellhound around here who likes threesomes! Come back!" The loli succubus called.
...
"He ran the wrong way." The loli succubus muttered.
...
So the loli succubus made her way out of her office, and found Druella sitting with Sherry outside her door. Michael hadn't found his way out of the twisting corridors of the sabbath yet, so the loli white mage was going to take that opportunity to do some chatting.
"Princess! It's good to see you in person again!" The loli succubus said happily.
"It's good to see you too~" Druella said.
They hugged each other warmly, and then turned towards Sherry.
"This is my knight, Searraigh Fontaine. She's the husband of..." Druella said.
"Michael Collins. I know. I've met him already. You have a very remarkable husband." The loli succubus said.
"I know. Oh how I know. Mistress Druella has told me of the work you do here. Since you're talking to us, does that mean he's..." Sherry started to ask.
"Unfortunately, the girl I had available decided to be the greedy type. She refused. It was my mistake." The loli succubus said.
"That's terrible! Don't you have any other girls available?" Sherry asked.
"I have a hellhound who might be willing..." The loli succubus said.
"Nono, not hell hounds. They're not on his list." Sherry said.
"List? Pardon me?" The loli succubus asked.
Druella gave Sherry a confused sideways glance.
"Could you perhaps come up with a Kraken, or a Cupid, or perhaps an Inari? Or how about a Bunyip?" Sherry asked.
The two other women stared at Sherry as if she were a madwoman.
"No, I don't have any of those kinds of inma here." The loli succubus said flatly.
"And cupids aren't even inma." Druella added.
...
"May I speak with you alone for a moment princess?" The loli succubus asked.
Druella nodded, and followed the petite succubus into another room. Sherry watched them closely until they disappeared.
*Thunk
They closed the door, and the loli turned to face the taller Lilim.
"I know that look in your eye. Is something wrong with Lord Collins?" Druella asked.
"Well... as you know, I do a checkup on every man that comes through here. He's in perfect health, but I found signs of significant old injuries." The loli succubus recounted.
"So? Men get injured all the time. They like to rough house." Druella said.
"Yes but... these injuries were healed by a healing spell. And not just any ordinary healing spell, but one that's common in the Order. Also, all these injuries happened within the last two or three months." The loli succubus explained.
"Hmm... Searraigh was once an Order knight. And she's been with him for two months. That's... concerning. Tell me about these injuries." Druella said.
"If they were not healed, he would likely have died from nearly any of them. Some of them were quite brutal, such as signs of choking and a crack to the head. He's also been repeatedly healed in the pelvis area... and I think I don't need to explain that one." The loli succubus recounted.
"Well I reject your implications. Searraigh could never harm a single hair on that man's head! Never ever! She couldn't do it any more than I could! You are never to make that false claim again!" Druella insisted.
"Yes princess." The loli succubus said obediently.
"Now... where is he?" Druella asked.
"He's... well... I'm not sure. He didn't take kindly to the wurm's advances. He ran like a jackrabbit." The loli succubus said.
...
~Later~
...
Michael eventually managed to navigate his way out of the offices, and to the waiting area which held Sherry and Druella. The moment he got there, he insisted they head for the exit.
"Enough playing around, we're going straight to the meeting without delay." Michael said.
"As you wish." Druella said.
So the two women headed for the exit. Michael followed, and he quietly bumped Druella's arm with his elbow.
"And when we get back to Lescatie, you and I are going to have words. Cupcake." Michael said quietly.
"Oh my!" Druella said quietly.
Sherry glanced backwards towards them with a concerned look in her eyes.
"And you! Don't ever leave me high and dry like that again! That wasn't funny!" Michael exclaimed.
"My apologies for having offended you." Sherry said stiffly.
...
..
.
The trio arrived at a massive double door. It was painted crimson, like the color of blood. Michael immediately noticed there were no guards at the door.
"If a hero were to make it this far into the castle, two more guards wouldn't make any difference. It would be time for mother to flick them away into the sea." Druella explained.
"Right. Well I don't want to get backhanded into oblivion, so... here we go!" Michael said.
*Creeeeeeeeak
Michael pushed the doors open and made his entrance.
*EEEEeeeeeerrraaaakCLANG
The door shut behind them.
...
A multitude of eyes turned towards him. The casual conversational din of the room fell silent. The room was very large, with crimson tapestries hanging from the intricately decorated walls. There was a large table in the center of the room, at which sat a handful of people. Surrounding those people was an entire army of maids.
"Whoa, looks like a maid convention in here. Is that a snack bar? That's the last thing I expected to see." Michael thought.
His eyes landed on the farthest part of the room, where Lilith sat upon her throne. Her right leg was crossed over her left, and she was watching him with an amused smirk on her face. Something not of his own mind pulled on him, urging him to walk towards the throne. Her power was drawing him closer.
"Sweetie... wait..." Sherry called weakly.
Michael was already out of earshot, so Druella had to help Sherry to her feet. She had collapsed to her knees the moment she entered the room. As Sherry looked on, she wondered how it was possible for a mere human to remain standing tall in the face of the most powerful woman in the world.
...
"Welcome Michael Collins. We meet again at last." Lilith said kindly.
"Our last conversation was cut a little short." Michael said.
"Such is the nature of things. I rarely find the time to do the things I should do as a mother, much less speak with pleasant young visitors. There was simply not enough time in the day." Lilith said.
"I understand. But you seem to have a little time today." Michael noted.
Lilith gracefully gestured towards the room, where the maids were busy moving tables and chairs around.
"I have no choice but to find the time to host this summit. The implications of what we discuss here will have profound effects on both of our worlds." Lilith said.
"On both of our worlds?" Michael questioned.
She nodded. Pausing, she looked Michael over from head to toe.
"You should have dressed better." Lilith said dryly.
"Your letter didn't warn me that you were having some sort of huge summit. I thought you wanted to speak to me in private." Michael said.
"That's because letters can be intercepted, even when delivered by my adorable yet poorly dressed little daughter." Lilith said.
"Mother!" Druella exclaimed.
"Yes?" Lilith shot.
Druella shrank back a little.
"These are traveling clothes..." Druella argued meekly.
"Then perhaps you should change out of your traveling clothes, and into something befitting a princess. And take your little knight with you, whatever her name was." Lilith said.
"...yes mother." Druella said obediently.
So the two of them worked their way out of the room, leaving Michael alone with Lilith. Once again her crimson eyes settled on him, and gave his spine a chill.
"Feel free to make yourself comfortable. When Druella returns, we shall begin." Lilith said.
...
So Michael found himself sitting in a padded chair at the large conference table. One of the maids came by, and asked him if he would like something to drink or eat. He asked for water.
"Are you sure that's all you desire Lord Collins?" The maid asked.
"Well..." Michael trailed off, eyeing the snack bar.
"I'll bring you an assortment, if you wish." The maid said.
"Sure, that sounds great! Thanks~" Michael said, smiling.
And so he ended up with a small plate of various medieval appetizers, a goblet of water, and a kiss on the cheek. The Royal Makai really was ~full service~.
...
One by one he watched as other people entered the throne room, and joined the people who had already been there before he arrived.
"I wonder who these people are? I can't get a good look at any of them. Oh... hey... I see someone with white hair. Is that a lilim?" Michael thought.
Michael raked his eyes quickly across the people, without lingering in one spot for too long. As best he could guess, there were several lilim out there in the crowd. During one of those eye scans, he spotted another interesting person standing next to the snack bar. She stuck out like a sore thumb, a woman with a pink beret, a pink frilly outfit covered in hearts, and pixie wings.
"That's a cupid! A real cupid! Ho wow! That's sooooo cool!" Michael thought, smiling faintly.
...
"Does that mean Eros is here? I would love to meet her! I wonder what she looks like? The MGE didn't have a picture of her, or any of the other major players. Not even Lilith." Michael thought.
The cupid in question seemed to notice Michael's lingering gaze. She smiled back, a pleasant twinkle appearing in her eyes. Unlike the inma who seemed to always look at Michael lewdly, the cupid's gaze was pure. It was a sort of well-intentioned gaze that he hadn't seen in a long while, having been dealing with inma for several months. In fact, the longer Michael thought about it, the more he realized that no person has ever looked at him like that ever in his entire life. Not even his own mother or father had ever looked at him like that. It was a gaze of pure kindness.
"I wonder what my expression looks like. Am I glaring at her like my old man always glared at me? I sure hope not. I wish I had a mirror right now." Michael thought.
...
"Okay. Reality check. Where the hell am I, and what am I doing? *inhale... I am sitting at a table, deep in the Royal Makai. Lilith herself is sitting on a throne to my left. Countless lilim and other such powerful people are standing all around me. I'm eating and drinking food served by Lilith's maids. And let's not forget Druella is running around somewhere, can't take her for granted. Holy shit, how did I get into this situation?" Michael thought.
He was a little overwhelmed just thinking about it. Deep down in his soul, Michael was reciting the Alan Shepard prayer.
...
Druella and Sherry eventually returned, wearing beautiful formal outfits that covered up more than normal, but also accentuated their best features. It made Sherry look even more lovely. She struggled to walk across the room, and she managed to limply sink into a chair next to Michael. Just going seventy five feet made her look like she just ran a marathon.
"Sweetie, I'm just barely holding on." Sherry said quietly.
"That's alright. Just try to relax." Michael said, patting her shoulder.
"Why are you not suffering as I am from the force of power in this room?" Sherry asked quietly.
"I don't know why. I'm just as confused as you are." Michael said softly.
*ClapClap!
"Everyone has now arrived. Please sit, and let us begin this summit!" Lilith called.
Lilith rose from her throne, and gracefully descended down to the conference table. She sat at the head of the table, and all the other attendees sat down after her. Druella took a seat at the head of the table near her mother. Sitting next to her were several lilim of various sizes and shapes. At the seat to Lilith's immediate left was child lilim. Standing behind the lilim were two Trumpart attendants.
"That's the queen of hearts!" Michael thought.
Next to them sat an array of lilim that Michael didn't immediately recognize. They were all beautiful to an inhuman degree. But oddly enough, Michael wasn't influenced by their charm like a normal man would be. Sherry had asked him, and he asked himself... how was he resisting the charm of the inma around him? It would be a mystery he would have to solve another time.
*Schrrrrrt
A chair scraped on the floor to Michael's left. Turning towards the direction of the sound, he found the cupid taking a seat next to him.
"Hello~" The cupid said softly.
Michael opened his mouth to say something, but his voice caught in his throat.
"He...hey." Michael said belatedly
"I'm Miranda. What's your name?" Miranda asked kindly.
"Michael." Michael blurted.
Sherry watched silently, without joining in on the conversation. Not that there was anything to join. The conversation pretty much died right there. Miranda looked just as awkward and nervous as Michael.
"Oh come now! Someone say something! Sweetie! It's a cupid! You love cupids! They're on your list! Say something to her! You can't be THIS hopeless, can you?" Sherry thought.
...
"Now that everyone has been seated, it is time for introductions. Everyone here is already familiar with everyone else, with the exception of our new guest. May I have the pleasure of introducing... Michael Collins, Earl Marshal of Lescatie and ambassador from the new world." Lilith announced.
There was a chorus of greetings from around the table. Michael nodded and greeted them in return.
"And Lord Collins, may I introduce..." Lilith started.
She gestured to the row of lilim sitting next to her.
"...my beloved daughters. Druella needs no introductions, so I'll start with..." Lilith continued.
"The Queen of Hearts. You don't look very impressive to me." The queen of hearts said bluntly.
"So? By what measurement are you comparing me? Normal people? Normal people are abnormal." Michael said.
Everyone around the table raised an eyebrow at his very conflicting statement. Not that Michael noticed, he was laser focused on the queen of hearts.
"What's normal?" The queen of hearts asked.
"Abnormal people." Michael said.
Sherry furrowed her eyebrows, and Druella started chuckling internally. Lilith rolled her eyes.
"Normal people are quite insane, simply because they're normal. That makes them abnormal. Obviously you should see why, unless you're normal. And if you're normal, you're abnormal." Michael continued.
...
"By adopting an abnormal behavior and making it normal, you normalize abnormal behavior. Then all the normal people are suddenly abnormal because they're not normal." Michael finished.
As soon as he finished his insane explanation, he turned and whispered in Sherry's ear.
"Chocolate. Give her chocolate." Michael whispered.
Sherry fumbled with her pocket dimension to get a chocolate bar out. While she did, Michael jacked his thumb at Sherry while mouthing the word 'Normal' to the queen of hearts. He got a giggle in reply.
...
Once Sherry finally found the candy and sent it across the table with magic, it didn't take long for the queen of hearts to greedily smear chocolate over her own face. Michael had very expertly checked all her boxes. The queen of hearts was pleased.
"Mommy, I like him. Can I keep him as a pet?" The queen of hearts asked innocently.
"No sweet heart, not this time. But maybe if you're nice, he'll come visit you in wonderland sometime after our summit." Lilith said, in a motherly tone.
"Yay!" The queen of hearts cheered.
And she went back to nomming on her chocolate bar. Sherry sent her another, just for good measure.
"With that out of the way, I'd like to introduce you to the rest of the table. Next, we have my beloved daughter Mary, and then Mari, and finally... my youngest Satrina." Lilith said.
"Mother! Must you always single me out as the youngest?" Satrina protested.
"Get used to it little sister, she will continue until you are not the youngest anymore. We all went through it." Druella interjected.
Michael smiled.
"Don't try to give up your youth so quickly. One of these days you're going to wake up and realize it's gone, and it'll never come back." Michael said.
"Unless she visits me in wonderland!" The queen of hearts interjected.
Everyone around the table chuckled lightly, including Satrina.
...
..
.
While this conversation was going on, Michael heard a sickeningly familiar voice quietly call to him from the other end of the table opposite of Lilith.
"Oh precious one~"
Michael's head whirled around. Sitting near the other end of the table was his blonde haired tormenter. He remembered her face all too well. She was the one who had been there when he was in the coma. She had been there, right after the doppelganger had nearly taken his life. He felt the urge to jump to his feet and walk out of the conference entirely. Sherry seemed to sense his sudden change in mood.
"Sweetie?" Sherry whispered.
Michael forced his eyes to look away from the blonde haired goddess. If he looked at her any further, he would probably pull out his Beretta and shoot her in that accursed smirking face. He forced himself to look at Sherry, in the hopes of getting his ever growing Irish temper under control. It helped a little.
"Something's wrong. I see that look in his eyes. There's danger here." Sherry thought.
Her eyes flicked towards where she had seen him looking, and her eyes passed right over the blonde haired goddess without lingering. Meanwhile, a flurry of thoughts were running through Michael's head.
"I thought she was the chief god. Sherry would definitely recognize her, so... she's not the chief god. Who is she? What's going on here?" Michael thought.
He glanced at the cupid sitting next to him, and the connection was made in his brain.
"No! Oh god no! Please no! Don't tell me... that's Eros!" Michael thought.
...
Lilith continued the introductions. The next person she introduced was a lovely woman with curly auburn hair and rosy freckled cheeks. She wore a happy smile, and her eyes glinted at Michael as she rose a goblet up into the air.
"May I have the pleasure of introducing Bacchus, the patron god of alcohol and merriment." Lilith said nicely.
"Ta!" Bacchus exclaimed.
Her free hand flicked towards Michael's cup of water, which shook violently. Suddenly the contents of the cup had been magically transformed into wine.
"Take a drink lad, it'll do you good!" Bacchus slurred.
Michael picked the cup up. He didn't want to be rude, and he had a hard time saying no to that cheerful and happy smile. She seemed like a very easy to get along with person. Just her voice alone was intoxicating, and it made one want to listen to it for hours. After spotting his enemy sitting at the other end of the table, a drink sounded like just the thing to have.
"No mortal can handle the wine of the gods." Druella warned.
Michael put the cup down and didn't touch it again. Bacchus shook her fist at Druella.
...
After all that got out of the way, Lilith continued on with her introductions. The next person she introduced was a wild and beautiful woman dressed in flowing blue green robes, with beautiful flowing white hair. By some strange effect of her power, the woman's hair was perpetually blowing, as if she were standing in a gale. Michael felt a certain elevated level of wariness looking at her, as if though she was calm at the moment but could erupt in anger at any time. It reminded him of himself.
"This is Poseidon, goddess of the sea. Her domain is all parts of the world that are water, and all man or inma in or on the water." Lilith said.
Poseidon didn't say a word, she simply nodded her head while smiling warmly. Michael felt a sense peace, like the sea on a warm summer day without any breeze. She was clearly a friend to those who respected her, including mankind. But as Michael felt before, he sensed a layer of danger underneath for anyone who dared earn her wrath. Her anger could easily erupt like a storm at sea. She was the embodiment of the ocean's unpredictability.
...
"And sitting next to Poseidon is the Fallen God." Lilith said.
"Patron ruler of Pandemonium. God of all who are depraved and lustful. Consider yourself invited." The Fallen God said, smiling devilishly.
"Thank you ma'am. I appreciate it." Michael said politely.
The fallen god reminded Michael a lot of Sherry, or maybe Elvira Mistress of the Dark. She had pitch black hair and pale skin, her clothes were tattered black robes with a leather bodice, and her very aura was blatantly seductive. If anything, Michael felt like he was looking at the most up front and straight forward of the group. Like a predator she watched him. The Fallen God was a devil, a dark sinister demon of lust and perversion. He knew that is she had her way, he and everyone else in the universe would be taken prisoner by inma extremists, trapped in infernal contracts, and raped for all eternity. There would be no right to refusal.
"If I ever want to be trapped in a realm where time means nothing and I just want to give up on any form of life other than sex, I'll go to pandemonium. I know some people who would be pretty tempted by that, but not me." Michael thought.
...
"And may I introduce Bastet, the patron ruler and god of the Cat Kingdom." Lilith said.
She gestured to what appeared to be an ordinary house cat, which was laying behind her near her throne.
"Meow~" Bastet said.
"Uh... hi?" Michael said.
"MEOW I SAY!" Bastet exclaimed.
With that, she curled up and went to sleep. Several light giggles came from around the table.
...
"And it is my pleasure to introduce... Hel. The goddess of the dead, undead, and the afterlife." Lilith said.
Michael nodded and politely greeted the petite young woman, who despite her elegance and beauty also gave off an air of miasma and death. She slowly formed a smile on her pale colorless skin.
"You have met death before, yet you are still living. A pity. Come a little closer, and I will show you the pleasures that come from true undeath." Hel said eerily.
Michael felt a chill go down his spine. The woman had basically just offered to end his life, right in front of everyone.
"Someday, but not quite yet." Michael said.
"It's hopeless to fight it. Death is coming, you cannot escape." Hel said.
"I know you love dead people Hel, but remember our agreement. Don't kill my guests please." Lilith said casually.
Her wicked smile grew even more.
"As you wish~" Hel said.
...
"Where's Ares?" Druella asked.
"She said she wasn't interested in coming." Lilith said.
"A shame. Ares would have liked Lord Collins." Druella said.
It was in that moment that the blonde haired woman of Michael's nightmares spoke.
"Lilith my old friend, are you going to introduce me?"
"Of course. Michael, this is..." Lilith tried to say.
"I am Eros, the goddess of all forms of love, romanticism, passion, and matters of the heart. I am friend to all beings who feel love. Especially you, precious one." Eros said cheerfully.
Sherry and everyone else at the table watched in amazement as intense disappointment etched Michael's face. His heart sank lower than it had ever sank before in his life.
"Why? Why did it have to be Eros? And the cupid... now I just want to cry." Michael thought.
His eyes flicked briefly towards Druella, who was observing him closely from across the table. He wondered if Druella was friends with Eros. He trusted Druella, and he trusted Sherry, but anyone who associated with the attempted murderer was suspect.
"How is it even possible that Eros tried to commit murder? What's going on here? Did she turn to the dark side?" Michael thought.
...
"I'm trapped. I can't say a word about this. If I do, then I'd screw up the summit. And who would believe me? It's easy to accuse the chief god, she's universally hated. But what about one of their own? Sure Eros is a neutral, but is a several thousand year old succubus demi god going to believe the accusations of a twenty five year old human stranger?" Michael thought.
...
Lilith continued on to introduce some of her higher level knights and commanders, but the names sort of went in one ear and out the other. Michael was in no mood to participate any further. The depression was too much.
...
"Now that the introductions are out of the way, we may begin this summit." Lilith said.
"And might I ask why this summit was called? I was right in the middle of our great festival of the flesh." The fallen god asked.
"You're always in the middle of an orgy my old friend. Surely you could find the time to humor us? Just this once?" Lilith countered.
"I suppose. It is worth coming, just to learn more about this new world that's been discovered." The fallen god said.
"That's why we're here. Which is why Lord Collins has been invited here today, along with his wife." Lilith said
She turned her devilish succubus eyes towards Michael.
"Tell us about your world Lord Collins." Lilith said.
...
"Maybe my wife should go first." Michael said evasively.
"Perhaps you are right. You may speak knight." Lilith said.
"The new world is a fantastical place, filled with countless millions of people and technological wonders! As I searched for my husband to be..." Sherry started.
She went ahead and retold the entire story of her adventure up to that point, with a heavy slant towards talking about only the things that involved Michael, or praising Michael, or trashing things Michael didn't like. She tended to slant her side of the story in a very lewd light, while leaving out tons of important details. She also said a lot of things without actually saying much at all, like 'countless millions' instead of the exact population of earth. She spoke about the technology, without actually describing anything in a detailed way, such as cars that go vroom and lightning that comes out of walls. Sherry really didn't understand any of it anyways, so it was probably the best sort of description she was capable of giving. After rambling on for what seemed like an eternity, Lilith finally called the first of many recesses.
.
..
...
When Michael got free of that conference room, he stood in the hallway and considered making like a tree and getting the hell out of there. If he went down the hallway and took a few memorized turns, he could duck out of the castle. Then he could get to the Duster, and zip his way down to the nexus no problem. But then... he considered how such an act would be rather cowardly.
*GRABGRAB!
He jerked in surprise when both of his arms were grabbed at the same time, with Druella on his left and Sherry on his right. They dragged him down another hallway, and ducked into a quiet study away from prying ears. Sherry threw a ward down which blocked perception of what they were discussing.
"Alright Michael. What's gone wrong?" Druella asked.
"You were doing so well, and then it went sour." Sherry said.
"No it definitely went sour when you wasted a half hour of our lives talking about the shape of his dick!" Druella shot.
"I'm sorry mistress! I tried to recount my quest as best I could!" Sherry exclaimed.
"What? Were you dropped on your head as a baby? The world doesn't revolve around his cock, nor does it revolve around an hour long description of the price of cucumbers in his world!" Druella added.
"I'm sorry mistress..." Sherry pouted.
Huffing in annoyance, Druella turned to Michael.
"And you! The last time I felt this much anger come from you, it was during the second battle of Lescatie! I half expected you to shoot someone at the table!" Druella exclaimed.
A flash of emotions crossed Michael's face, which didn't escape Druella's attention. She turned pale.
"You... actually were thinking about shooting someone!" Druella whispered.
"I want to go home." Michael said softly.
"Who was it sweetie? Was it Hel? She did threaten to kill you." Sherry reasoned.
"No it wasn't Hel." Michael said softly.
"So it's something worse than a threat. What could it have been?" Druella reasoned.
"I want to go..." Michael tried to say.
"You're not going anywhere! This summit is far too important to leave now!" Druella exclaimed, annoyed.
"If you won't tell us the problem, we can't help you." Sherry said.
Michael's eyes fell.
"Do you remember when the doppelganger tried to kill me, and how I went into a coma just after?" Michael asked softly.
...
..
.
It took a few moments, but Sherry finally put two and two together. She gasped, and covered her mouth.
"It cannot be!" Sherry exclaimed.
"What? Who? What are you talking about?" Druella demanded.
"Eros." Sherry whispered.
Sherry turned and began cussing under her breath. Druella became so angry that her hands began shaking.
*Thump
Druella landed in a nearby chair.
"Betrayal." Druella breathed.
"How DARE she attack my husband! If I had known, I would have..." Sherry started.
"Done what? Cut her asunder? If you had tried, you would have started a holy war between the demon realms and Eros's domain! A war we cannot afford!" Druella exclaimed.
"Is it not ALREADY a holy war? If she attacked us, then she is certainly allied with the chief god!" Sherry exclaimed.
"We do not know everything! Michael, are you SURE it was Eros?" Druella asked.
"She never said her name. All I can tell you for sure is that woman in that throne room sounds, acts, and looks exactly the same." Michael said emphatically.
"That's as clear as you could ever make it, considering." Druella said softly.
...
"Is it possible... she's been playing us from the beginning?" Sherry asked.
Druella put her hands over her face.
"I don't know. I just don't know anymore. I cannot believe this is happening. Eros was my friend." Druella murmured.
"She might have an agreement with the chief god. Maybe that's why she never signed a treaty with Lilith. Maybe she's a spy." Michael reasoned.
"Oh I have no doubt she has an agreement with the chief god. Despite her appearance, she is quite the wily one. She's always negotiating one way or another." Druella explained.
"So she's a player. She's working all the angles. She's here to gather information." Michael reasoned.
...
"Sherry..." Michael said.
Sherry straightened slightly, as if she was snapping to attention.
"You were in that room. Do you know who those people are allied with? Who's friends with who?" Michael asked.
Druella looked up and peeked through her fingers after Michael asked his question. Sherry looked uncertain.
"Well... I know Bastet doesn't like Poseidon too much. Cats don't like getting wet. Ares doesn't agree with most everyone, which is probably why she's not at the summit." Sherry explained.
Michael nodded along.
"Continue." Michael said.
"Most everyone is neutral concerning Hel, because most everyone in that room is immortal. So death doesn't concern them." Sherry explained.
"What about Eros? Who is she friends with?" Michael asked.
"Hmm... I think she's on good terms with nearly everyone, especially Lilith. But I know she is on bad terms with the fallen god." Sherry said.
"Why the fallen god?" Michael asked.
"The fallen god promotes lust and debauchery as a form of love, which is in disagreement with Eros's views. Eros tends to prefer the classical kinds of love..." Sherry explained.
"I don't care what Eros prefers. I only want to know who she's friends with so I know who my enemies are." Michael said bluntly.
"Wait what? My mother is friends with Eros!" Druella interjected.
"Then I'd say we've got a serious problem on our hands." Michael said bluntly.
Druella stood up quickly, and grabbed Michael's shoulders.
"No no no! This can't be happening right now! Mother has been trying to ally herself with Eros for centuries, but she also needs you too! Don't turn away from her like this!" Druella exclaimed.
"Well what the heck do you expect me to do? What if it had been you who had your soul nearly thrown into oblivion? What if you found your attempted murderer here today? How would you react?" Michael asked pointedly.
Again Druella sank back down into the chair.
"I would want to go home." Druella admitted.
...
"I commend you for controlling yourself so well in public. Now... all that's left is to try to survive the next day or two." Druella said quietly.
"Your mother is going to ask me about my world." Michael noted.
"Indeed. You'll answer her." Druella said.
Michael scowled.
"Don't make that face. You're not putting your world in danger. First off, we have a treaty. I am obligated to answer if you call for aid. Second, there's nothing you can say in that room that can't easily be discovered by a spy going to your world. And I've already proven that spies can get through." Druella said.
"Hmm..." Michael said, uncertain.
"There's no need to say anything like how many knights you have, or what weapons they possess. Not that mother would ask that question in the first place." Druella said.
"Okay, then I guess it's still on. I just have to keep my temper under control, or I'll end up making a scene." Michael said.
"Well that's a simple problem to solve. Searraigh, service your husband." Druella commanded.
Sherry sensually licked her plump lips.
"By your command mistress." Sherry purred.
Sherry sank down to her knees, and tugged Michael's pants open.
"Hey what the hell?!" Michael exclaimed.
...
~Later~
...
Druella, Sherry, and Michael all made their way back into the throne room to rejoin the summit. People were still returning, so many of the chairs were empty. Michael sat down, and Sherry sat on his right. Michael glanced at Sherry, and noted she seemed to be handling the aura of the room a lot better than before.
"Maybe she's getting used to it." Michael thought.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the table, Druella approached her sisters who were just getting ready to sit down.
"Satrina, I must ask a favor of you." Druella said.
"What is it?" Satrina asked.
"I need you to go sit next to Lord Collins." Druella said.
All the lilim cooed.
"You're trying to set your little sister up with a man~" Mary purred.
"I'm not! This is important. If you do this, I will no longer call you little sister." Druella said.
Satrina was out of that chair and around the table in a flash. Druella smiled as she watched her youngest sibling hurry around the table and sit on Michael's immediate left.
*Schhrt
*Plop
"Heya~" Satrina said cutely.
"Um... hi." Michael said, uncertain.
"My sister Druella sends her regards." Satrina said.
Michael glanced over towards Druella, who beamed him a reassuring smile. It was immediately obvious to Michael what Druella was doing. She had her little sister sit next to Michael so the cupid Miranda couldn't sit there. It was an extra buffer between him and Eros. Druella herself couldn't sit there, because she was the fourth princess. She was required to sit by Lilith. But nobody cared what the youngest princess did, she sat where she wanted. Being of a lower rank meant she had more leeway.
"So... tell me about yourself." Michael asked quietly.
...
"He'll talk to the lilim, but not the cupid? Why is my husband so broken?" Sherry thought.
...
"You're interested in little old me? Very well. I am a white mage. I'm practicing to become the finest healer in all these lands, by using both magic and medicines." Satrina said.
"That's fantastic! You're going to love what happens in a little bit, here at this summit." Michael said.
"Now I'm intrigued." Satrina said, smiling.
...
"Say, I ran into a white mage earlier today. She was a member of the Sabbath, and she said she's been studying genetics for thousands of years." Michael recalled.
"Ah yes. I know of her. She was a teacher of mine. Her work is a little... eccentric, but she's quite brilliant." Satrina noted.
"She also happens to be one hundred percent accurate. On my world, we've been studying genetics for a very long time." Michael said.
"REALLY! How interesting! She must have been truly tickled pink to have her work validated by someone! One day... I hope to surpass even her skills." Satrina said.
"Well I wish you luck." Michael said.
...
Meanwhile, during the conversation between Michael and Satrina, Miranda and Eros entered the summit room together. Eros went to her place at the table, while the cupid made her way around to sit next to Michael again. When she arrived, she found Satrina in her seat. There was no way a mere cupid would dare tell a lilim, a daughter of the monster lord, to get up and sit somewhere else. So she turned around and went back to Eros. Leaning down, Miranda whispered in Eros's ear, to which Eros glanced towards Michael in surprise. When she saw the lilim sitting there, she whispered up in Miranda's ear. The cupid responded by standing behind Eros like an attendant.
...
Michael watched as the people settled down into their chairs. Not a moment went by when Eros wasn't staring directly at Michael with that smile on her face. It made his skin crawl. As for the cupid Miranda, she avoided his gaze as much as possible. Once Lilith took her seat at the head of the table, people fell silent.
"Thank you for returning. Now that we've rested, let us continue our discussion from before." Lilith said.
"Just no more of that ditzy succubus please. I believe my intelligence has dropped after listening to her." Mary said.
"I thought her analysis of Lord Collin's cock was quite compelling." The fallen god said.
Michael noticed Eros squirm uncomfortably. It was clear she was distressed by what the inma thought to be a normal harmless conversation. It made him suspicious.
"Why is Eros uncomfortable in this line of conversation? Does she dislike how inma speak? I'm not uncomfortable, and it's my dick they're talking about." Michael thought.
...
"While I'm sure Lord Collins is well enough endowed for a human, I must insist that we focus on more important matters. I wish to start from the beginning, with Michael himself answering our questions." Lilith said dryly.
"Yep... I saw that coming." Michael thought.
...
"We could start with getting a straight answer. Just how many people live in your world?" Lilith asked.
"Seven and a half billion." Michael said bluntly.
People around the table started laughing. Michael whirled his head around, scowling at the people.
"Billions! Surely you jest!" Lilith exclaimed.
Michael glared at her angrily. Lilith's laugh died instantly. Druella leaned over and whispered into her mother's ear.
"Mother, please do not laugh at his words. If it comes from him, it is the absolute truth. He is offended by being called a liar." Druella whispered.
"Thank you daughter. I see that now." Lilith whispered.
...
"I apologize, you are clearly speaking in earnest. Your world contains... seven and a half billion..." Lilith trailed off.
"What is a billion? I've never heard of such a number." Satrina asked.
"A thousand million." Michael said.
She mouthed his answer to herself for a moment, and then her eyes widened in comprehension.
"Think about it. Seven billion humans, half of which are men. Every inma in every demon realm could have a husband without any problem. Many of us wouldn't even have to double up." Mari said in awe.
"Maybe there's even a cutie for me." Satrina murmured.
"So... does that mean you're planning on invading?" Michael asked.
The table erupted into an outcry from the various lilim at the table.
"Nonono!"
"That's not right!"
"We don't want to do that!"
It all seemed overly defensive. Lilith waved her hand, and the table fell silent.
"That's not our plan at all. We view your world as a long lost sister world to our own. Our intentions are purely peaceful." Lilith reassured.
"I for one am interested to learn if anyone on your world would be willing to listen to my dark priests." The fallen god said.
"I have no doubt there are." Michael said.
"I'm sure there are plenty of dead people for me to speak with. I might bring a few of them back from the void." Hel said.
"That'd be great. I'd love to talk to some of my country's founding fathers. Just make sure you don't bring back any bad people." Michael said.
"And I wanna taste yer alcohol!" Bacchus slurred.
Michael bumped Sherry's elbow, but she beat him to it. She dug around in her pocket dimension, and produced a bottle of alcohol. A few moments later, Bacchus was happily chugging down a bottle of American Rye Whiskey.
...
"So where were we?" Michael asked.
"You mentioned how many people are in your world. Before your wife came, how many inma were there?" Lilith asked.
"Zero." Michael said.
"And how many members of the Order were there?" Lilith asked.
"Zero." Michael said.
"How many magicians?" Lilith asked.
"Zero." Michael said.
He was worried about answering that last one. Magic was powerful, and conventional weapons couldn't really stop a determined mage, as Sherry had proven time and time again. If someone really wanted to, they could probably conquer the planet with just a handful of powerful spellcasters. That was assuming Sherry wasn't standing at the portal, ready to stop them. He was putting a lot of faith that Sherry would be there, and he was putting faith into Druella's treaty.
"So before our world touched yours, there was absolutely no trace of us to be found. You had no idea we existed?" Lilith asked.
"That's not entirely true. We had the Monster Girl Encyclopedia." Michael said.
Several eyebrows raised around the table. The encyclopedia had been rather popular on earth, but the inma hadn't thought much about it. They liked the idea of a human writing about them in a positive light, but ultimately it was just one thing in their day they had to deal with before getting back to the war at hand.
"I'm not sure how it got onto Michael's world. I suspect the author, Kenkou Cross, was blessed with a vision of the wandering scholar's work. Or maybe Cross is the wandering scholar in disguise. We don't know." Sherry said.
"I heard that he's been missing for some time. Perhaps he found a way to this new world." Druella said.
Michael nodded in agreement.
"Otherwise, my world shares some parallels to yours. For example, the people who live in Lescatie speak a certain language shared by a country known as France in my world. Or the people of Zipangu speak a language known as Japanese in my world." Michael explained.
"Interesting. Go on." Lilith said.
"The language we're speaking right now is called English. In your world you have the Mist Continent, which is called China in my world. Your world has similar plants and animals to my world. So on, so on, so on." Michael said.
"So it really is our sister world!" Druella exclaimed.
"Yet somehow inma do not exist on your world, and neither does magic. What a depressing thought." Lilith said.
"It's very depressing. In the new world, they can't even freely make love without fretting over some illness." Sherry explained
A chorus of gasps emanated from around the table. Michael felt like crawling under the table and dying. Of all the things he thought of mentioning at that summit... STDs were the very last thing.
"No worries, my husband is perfectly clean and healthy. I'm quickly eliminating the problem from his world." Sherry added.
...
"And what else from our world has come through your portal? Has the cancer that is the Order spread to the new world yet?" Lilith asked.
"We discovered some fringe lunatics who were worshipping the chief god, but most people in my country couldn't care less what the Order has to say." Michael said.
"Oh goodie, some open minded people. I hope they're open minded sexually as well." The fallen god interjected.
"They have a whole city dedicated to sin!" Sherry interjected.
"Hmm... that sounds fun~" The fallen god hummed.
"It is! I turned the entire city into a demon realm, with millions of people inside! Now they're fucking constantly, it's so nice~" Sherry said happily.
"Enough Searraigh. We're pleased with your conquest, but we've heard enough about it." Druella said.
"I'm sorry mistress." Sherry said meekly.
...
"You've told us the population of your world, but how do you feed so many people?" Satrina asked innocently.
"Well... we don't have magic to help us, so we've developed planting techniques and superior plant and animal husbandry. And we've developed better ways of preserving food for long amounts of time without degrading the quality or nutrition of the food. It's not perfect, we still have starving people on my world. I hope that if we combine your magic with our knowhow, we can solve hunger on both our worlds." Michael explained.
"I would like to see examples of foods created on your world." Lilith said.
"I thought you'd never ask. Sherry?" Michael said.
*CrackleWHOOSH!
An array of goodies appeared in front of Lilith and everyone else around the table. There was German chocolate, caviar from Russia, champagne from France, rice from China, Japanese sake, dates from the Middle East, and curry seasonings from South Africa. There were other things that he gave them, such as coffee, tea, homemade preserves, fruits, hard preserved meats, and a whole variety of cheeses. It was a sampling of nearly every culture across the planet Earth, and it had the side benefit of showing the people how food was preserved and stored in Michael's world.
"A little while after we opened the portal to your world, people started showing up from all over. They gave me all these gifts, and asked me to give them to you. They wanted me to tell you... thanks for sending Sherry." Michael explained.
The lilim all cooed in wonder at the array of amazing exotic goods laid out before them. The idea that all those things had come from another world was so thrilling. It was just the reaction Michael was looking for. Just as Christopher Columbus brought goods from the Americas to the Spanish royalty, he was bringing goods to Lilith and her royalty.
"You may tell them that it was our pleasure, and that we graciously accept these gifts." Lilith said.
Everyone at the table had a chance to try some of the treats that Michael brought. The maids were quick to prepare and divvy up the champagne, sake, cheese, meats, and such. Of course Bacchus was quite pleased to sample all the alcohol. The fallen god was quite partial to the chocolates, and Poseidon enjoyed the caviar. The queen of hearts was obsessed with the cheese, much to Michael's amusement.
...
And then there was Eros. She refused everything offered to her by the maids.
"Don't you want to try anything?" Bacchus asked, offering some champagne.
"I didn't come here for mere trifles." Eros said flatly.
"Why doesn't she want to try anything? Is it because she can't stand the though of eating or drinking with her enemy?" Michael thought.
...
After a while, once everyone was done sampling the goods of Earth, Michael continued talking. He went on an extended explanation of all the medical and food production advancements that had been made on earth. Then he talked about industry, manufacturing, and the economy. He showed pictures, provided text books, described things in clear and concise detail, and even used a whiteboard. He described the culture of various countries on earth, as best he understood them. After it was all said and done, Michael had given everyone at that table a fantastic glimpse into what his world was actually like. Unlike what Sherry had done.
...
Then he lifted the lid on a plastic tub he had placed on the conference table.
"And I present to you, the product of those advancements." Michael said.
He glanced at Satrina to his left.
"Best hold onto your tail, you're gonna love this." Michael said, grinning.
He began pulling antibiotics out of the plastic tote, and held up one of the bottles for people to see.
"How'd you like to eliminate the black death from society? How about anthrax? Or how about blood infections from battlefield wounds? Well here's the ticket." Michael said.
The smile on Satrina's face disappeared instantly, and was replaced by shock. She snatched one of the bottles, and began reading it as if trying to learn the ingredients.
"Just as that medicine can heal, it can also cause harm. I'll give it to you, but with the understanding that you will learn everything about it first before ever giving out the first dose. Agreed?" Michael asked.
"Agreed. What are these medicines called?" Satrina asked.
"Antibiotics. They're relatively cheap. A full course of antibiotics to cure someone of the black death would cost about the same as a meal at a tavern." Michael explained.
The people around the table cooed in amazement. Even Hel was impressed, she didn't like to see people suffer before they die.
"But wait, there's more!" Michael said cheerfully.
He began pulling packets of seeds out of the plastic tote.
"How'd you like to end starvation while you're busy ending the black plague?" Michael asked.
He handed a wad of seed packets to Satrina, who began passing them down the table. People started reading them, and he must have seen a dozen double takes all up and down the table. Of course the monster lord quickly figured out what Michael was implying when he said they'd end starvation. She discovered how long it would take for those seeds to sprout and produce a crop.
"Is this real? How is this possible?" Lilith asked.
"In my world, there are 365 days in a year." Michael said.
"What!? That's not right, there are 526 days in a year!" Satrina said.
"He is speaking the truth. There are 365 days in a year on his world. Our year is longer than his." Sherry said.
...
..
.
The wheels were visibly turning in Lilith's head. As old as she was, and as wise as she was, it didn't take long before a Mack truck full of clue hit her at freeway speeds.
"I don't get it." Bacchus said.
"The year is shorter on my world, which means all the plants are adapted to growing in a shorter year. If you plant those same plants in your world with your longer year, then you can plant multiple crops in one year. You could double your food production." Michael explained.
"Maybe even triple, depending on what you grow and where." Lilith interjected.
"I think we should take a recess, so we can properly consider what the implications of these gifts truly are. Thank you Lord Collins." Druella said.
"You're welcome." Michael said, nodding.
...
In that fashion, Michael found himself outside the summit room again. Druella, Sherry, and Satrina all caught him, and they pushed him into the same unused room as before.
*Click
They shut and locked the door. Sherry warded it again.
"Fantastic work Michael! Your gifts are going to change our world in ways you can't even imagine yet!" Druella remarked.
"I have a pretty good imagination, but I get what you mean." Michael said.
"Why didn't you say you brought medicines after I told you I'm a white mage?" Satrina asked.
"I did. I told everyone~" Michael winked.
"The treats were appreciated, but I feel the medicine and seeds were the star of the show. I've never seen the mother so excited before. She is usually very calm and collected." Druella said.
"She's probably happy we're in recess right now. She's certainly in the other room, dancing around like a little girl~" Satrina giggled.
"Yeah. She is. No doubt." Druella agreed.
Michael chuckled to himself. The thought of a powerful influential person like Lilith dancing around amused him to no end.
"Won't it be a problem if Eros gets her hands on what we've brought?" Sherry asked.
"I don't care. So what if she took it back to the Order and gave it to them? It's still going to save lives one way or another. It'll only help us." Michael said.
"Wait what? What was that about Eros and the Order? Why would she give anything to the Order?" Satrina asked.
Michael, Sherry, and Druella all hesitated. Eventually Druella spoke up.
"Eros was involved with a murder plot against Lord Collins. We believe she's working with the chief god." Druella said.
"He was in a coma for weeks recovering from the first attack, and then they tried to attack him again." Sherry added.
Satrina's face turned sorrowful, and she wrapped her arms gently around Michael.
"I'm so sorry. That must have been terrible." Satrina said softly.
"It's nothing. Thank your sister, she's the one who saved me from the first attack. Sherry and an army of mages saved me from the second." Michael said.
Satrina turned her eyes towards Druella.
"Thank you sister. You saved a man who brought us life saving medicines and starvation ending seeds." Satrina said.
"You're welcome." Druella said.
...
"Hey, I have an idea. Sherry? Pull out that Physicians' Desk Reference I asked you to pack." Michael said.
Sherry pulled the book in question out of her pocket dimension. She actually had several copies stashed away between her tits.
"Here, you should have fun thumbing through this when you've got some free time." Michael said.
"I thank you." Satrina said sweetly.
...
"Now... we should plan our next move." Michael said.
"She will likely ask about Fort Chell next." Druella warned.
"Excellent. First I'll talk about the treaty I have with you and Lescatie. I'll talk about how we're formally cooperating now. Then that will let me segue into what I think of your city, and how valuable it is in the war against the Order." Michael said.
Druella's eyes began to twinkle.
"You remembered your promise~" Druella said.
"Yep, I sure did. I said I would discuss Lescatie with Lilith, and that's exactly what I'm going to do." Michael vowed.
"Is Lord Collins going to argue your case with mother?" Satrina asked.
"He is. And I think... I've found a good ally." Druella said.
"What of after? What shall we say about Eros?" Sherry asked.
"Nothing. If all goes well, nobody at that summit will ever know about my problem with Eros." Michael said.
"That is wise. Mother does not need additional problems. We may deal with Eros on our own time." Druella agreed.
"This is silly! He should say something, so mother can be warned about Eros!" Satrina exclaimed.
"Sweetie is a newcomer here. It would be difficult for anyone to trust him." Sherry added.
Michael nodded in agreement.
...
..
.
So Michael, Sherry, Druella, and Satrina all made their way back into the summit room. They were a little later than everyone else in returning to the summit room, and were among the last ones to sit at the table. The cupid Miranda was already sitting in the chair to the left of where Michael usually sat. Satrina was forced to return to her mother's side. At the last moment before Michael was forced to sit next to the cupid, Sherry had a flash of inspiration. She plopped down in Michael's seat, forcing Michael to sit one seat to the right, where Sherry had been sitting. That meant Sherry was on his left, and the patron god of lust and depravity was on his right. She gave him a look akin to a predator looking at its prey.
"I want to see your face twisted in permanent ecstasy." The fallen god said softly.
"Thanks?" Michael said, uncertain.
She slid her nailed fingers under his chin, pulled him closer, and whispered in his ear.
"A million whores await your arrival in Pandemonium. Worship me, and all your darkest depraved desires will come true." The fallen god whispered.
Her words oozed and slithered into Michael's ear. She wasn't just some casual harlot suggesting a good time, she was the literal goddess of depravity. Each syllable was jam packed with raw magical power, manipulating past Michael's brain filters and into his very soul. Something that would normally seem unacceptable because of his societal filters were suddenly perfectly acceptable. It would have been so terribly easy for Michael to just nod along and say 'yeah sure, let's do it'. The words invoked a vision of what his future would hold if he let himself fall. It would be a warped reality where time meant nothing, and the only thing that mattered was those million whores pushing him down and doing whatever they wanted. He could almost smell and taste them. The fallen god's words contained all that sensory information, forcing him to experience a million harlots with honey dripping down between their legs. The more he thought about it, the more appealing it got. Before long, Michael felt a strange sensation akin to his body moving towards the right, towards the fallen god. It was as if his inner ear were out of whack.
"Michael!" Eros exclaimed.
Michael jerked to his senses, and pulled away from the fallen god. The fallen god shot Eros an angry glare, but the god of love didn't bother returning it. She focused her attention on a goblet of wine that one of the maids had poured her. Michael shuddered, and forced himself to not look at the fallen god again, or think about the image that had just been in his mind. The temptation was too great.
"Did she... just help me?" Michael thought, confused.
"Lord Collins, if you are done being teased by the fallen god, may we continue?" Lilith asked.
"Right. Sorry. Let's go." Michael said.
"You have provided us a great many things of considerable value, but you have yet to ask for anything in return. What are your demands?" Lilith asked.
"I'm not asking for anything other than a thank you. I'm sharing these things because I'm friends with Druella, and because we have a treaty with Lescatie. I'm not offering to fix all your problems, I'm making you aware that solutions exist. All you have to do it go get them. I get nothing out of this." Michael explained.
Druella smiled warmly. Their friendship was far more important to Michael than money, or titles, or whatever else he could get.
...
"You have a house in Lescatie, do you not?" Lilith asked.
"I do. It was a gift from Druella. I don't stay in it as much as I should. I really love Lescatie. It's a fantastic city." Michael said.
"And you signed a treaty." Lilith said.
"Yes, I signed a treaty specifically with Lescatie." Michael said.
Lilith turned towards Druella.
"He has an army, and an encampment surrounding the portal to his world. Correct?" Lilith asked.
"Also correct. They've named it Fort Chell." Druella said.
"Then perhaps this man will make up for your foolishness in capturing the city of Lescatie. You may rely on his military might instead of mine to maintain that city." Lilith said flatly.
"If I may make a comment on that." Michael interjected.
She turned her eyes back to Michael.
"Proceed." Lilith said.
"Your daughter made a strategically sound choice in capturing Lescatie. The Order has already consumed a great deal of time and resources trying to re capture it, all of which have failed. It is in a strategic location, defending your realm from attacks by sea." Michael argued.
"This is true." Lilith admitted.
"Furthermore, by capturing the city, Druella has eliminated a breeding ground for Order heroes. So not only has the Order wasted thousands of soldiers trying to recapture the city, they no longer have the ability to produce those heroes. Druella has eliminated a great deal of pressure from your dark knights." Michael argued.
"She has also consumed a great deal of resources in defending the city. Resources I cannot spare. Capturing the city was a human tactic." Lilith argued.
"Your enemy is human." Michael noted.
"That does not mean we should adopt their tactics." Lilith argued.
"That is absolutely correct. On this we agree. However, Druella has not adapted their tactics, because the human tactic would have been to massacre every living man, woman, and child in the city, and then burn it to the ground. Thus eliminating the threat, while not consuming resources." Michael argued.
Lilith opened her mouth, then closed it again. It was true, the humans would have massacred everyone and burned the city to the ground. Lilith had seen it a thousand times. It was the very cold, very calculating, very heartless, very human thing to do.
"What Druella did when capturing the city was far more merciful and gentle, like what an inma should do. Think of all those happy people in Lescatie. Aren't they the reason why you're fighting this war in the first place?" Michael argued.
Druella nodded along. One of her own personal justifications for the capture of Lescatie had been the people living inside the city walls. Every time she began to doubt herself, she thought about the people.
...
"My dear daughter, you've brought quite the interesting person to argue your case." Lilith said.
"Yes mother." Druella said, eyes twinkling.
"He clearly believes in your cause. He is a true friend. Cherish him. I will no longer oppose your capturing of Lescatie." Lilith said.
A wave of emotions crossed Druella's face. She was happy that she finally had vindication of her hard work, but she was also frustrated that it took a complete stranger to finally get Lilith to accept the very same arguments she had used countless times in the past. Sometimes it was difficult for a parent to listen to the words of someone whom they once changed diapers.
...
Lilith raked her eyes over the table full of goodies that Michael had given them. All the snacks, the educational books, the medicines, and especially the seeds. Nodding to herself, she raised her hand towards Michael.
"I command thee to disseminate these new medicines, seeds, and agricultural knowledge far and wide. It will help us in the war if the humans have less reason to fight us. The Order uses hunger as a tool to encourage anger against us." Lilith said.
"I protest." Eros said suddenly.
Every head at the table turned towards Eros, who had remained more or less silent during the previous few minutes of the summit.
"Why would you protest? These things could help the humans, and I know you want that." Lilith asked softly.
"I do not protest you giving these things to the humans. I protest you commanding Michael Collins to do it. It is not appropriate for you to order around my subjects." Eros said calmly.
The entire table erupted into a chorus of angry protests. Just about everyone at that table protested Eros trying to lay claim to Michael so blatantly. Druella believed that Michael was her subject, and Searraigh supported her. The queen of hearts wanted more chocolate and a boy toy. The Lilim all wanted husbands, as did their attendants. Hel still wanted to kill Michael for laughs. About the only two gods who didn't protest were Poseidon and Bastet. The cupid Miranda remained silent as well, and she wore a completely neutral expression. Michael couldn't tell if she was angry, happy, or something in between.
"Please! This is not the place or time to be arguing about whom Michael Collins is serving!" Druella cried.
"Be quiet daughter." Lilith said.
"But mother!" Druella argued.
"Shush child! You know not what you speak of! Eros called for this summit in the first place!" Lilith chastised.
The room fell deathly silent.
...
Bacchus slowly turned towards Eros, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"I thought we were neutral. We don't care about the war between the humans and the inma. Why would you do this?" Bacchus said in a moment of pure clarity.
"Because I had no choice. My hand was forced." Eros said through gritted teeth.
She stood up, and looked at Michael directly.
"Long I have been neutral in the war between man and mamono. Many have asked why, but I've never hidden my feelings. I am the goddess of love, and love has no place in war." Eros said.
"We understand that. Nobody is questioning it." Lilith interjected.
"I know, but grant me the opportunity to voice my full thoughts without interruption." Eros said.
...
"She's got everyone eating out of her hand. What a fraud." Michael thought.
...
"I have been so strict in my neutrality, the chief god has permitted my cute little angels to do their holy duties in Order territory. We were at peace, and I was content to spread my message amongst both sides of the conflict." Eros said.
...
"That peace is no more. The Order has begun assaulting my beloved children in the name of the chief god. Many innocent people with nothing but love in their hearts... have perished." Eros said.
The look on Lilith's face was one of true pain.
"I'm so sorry to learn of this. My heart... aches." Lilith said, genuinely pained.
Eros curled her fist up and pressed it against the smooth surface of the summit table. Michael watched with suspicion.
"So on this day, before you and before all who bear witness, I declare my intention to negotiate an alliance!" Eros declared.
Quiet murmuring filled the room. None of them, not a single soul, had expected Eros to ever wish to join Lilith. She had simply been neutral for too long. To hear those words uttered in that room shook the very fabric of the summit. Everything was changed.
...
And Michael was more suspicious than ever.
...
"Why is she suddenly trying to ally herself with Lilith? Is she trying to create a formal treaty before I ruin it? Should I ruin it? What would the others think if a relative stranger came along and trashed centuries of negotiations? All that good opinion of me would be inverted instantly. I'd become the bad guy, and she knows that." Michael thought.
...
"If Lilith decides she's pissed at me, she might demand Druella cut me off. Then Druella would be forced to choose between her family and a relative stranger. I can't do that to her." Michael thought.
...
"Wait though. I should look at the bigger picture. What would happen if Eros allies herself with Lilith? She would get access to Lilith's inner sanctum. All her battle plans, her tactics, her resources, troop deployments, weaknesses... all accessed. She could relay that information to the Order, and Lilith would start losing the war. Millions of inma would die." Michael thought.
...
"If my theory is right, Eros will want to remain independent of Lilith even with a treaty. She won't want to accept demonic energy into her body like the fallen god or Poseidon has." Michael thought.
...
"So... on one hand, my personal relationship with Lilith and Druella would be ruined. On the other hand, Lilith and Druella lose the war. What do I do?" Michael thought.
...
"Is it really my problem? Or should I just keep my nose out of someone else's business? I want to help Lilith, but she's way older and wiser than me. She might already know about it." Michael thought.
...
"Oh! I know what I'll do! I'll let Druella warn Lilith in private. She doesn't even have to name drop me, all she has to do is put the bug in Lilith's ear. If she has all the information, then she can decide what's good for her and what isn't. That's what I'm going to do." Michael thought.
...
"What are your demands?" Lilith asked.
"I have two demands. Number one... I am to remain autonomous from your domain. I shall continue ruling heaven as I always have, and I will not be required to fall like the fallen god." Eros said.
...
"I knew it!" Michael thought.
...
"Agreed. What is your second demand?" Lilith asked.
"You must formally acknowledge Michael Collins as my subject." Eros said.
"Oh shit." Michael thought.
"I don't see a problem with that." Lilith said casually.
She casually gestured to Michael.
"Become her subject. Then we shall have the treaty." Lilith commanded.
"I'm sorry, but I can't do that." Michael said calmly.
She did a double take. Obviously she wasn't expecting Michael to flat out refuse. Neither did Eros, or the cupid Miranda, or anyone else. The fallen god had a smirk on her face.
"Would you care to repeat that?" Lilith asked.
"I said I won't become Eros's subject." Michael repeated.
An angry look appeared on Lilith's face.
"You will become her subject, and I will have my treaty. Human." Lilith warned.
*SCHHHRRRRCH!
Druella's chair screeched as she jumped to her feet, surprising Michael and everyone else at the table.
"That is completely unacceptable! He is my Earl Marshal, and you can't have him!" Druella exclaimed.
"Sit down!" Lilith shot.
Druella's eyes flicked up to Michael, and back to Lilith repeatedly. She looked desperate, and Michael didn't know what to do to help. The look on Lilith's face, and her tone of voice, all clearly indicated that she was at the end of her fuse. If Druella pushed any further, Lilith was going to get VERY angry.
...
Druella made her decision.
"No! I refuse to back down! He is my friend and I cherish him!" Druella said defiantly.
Druella's defiance seemed to take Lilith by surprise.
"Perhaps... we should have another recess for lunch?" Eros suggested.
"I think you're right. Druella... come with me. Now." Lilith said angrily.
...
..
.
So the summit went into recess. Druella lingered behind as everyone filed out of the room. Michael was one of the last, and he shook his head side to side before walking out. It was good that she was trying to help, but Lilith wouldn't listen to any arguments after that drama. Michael's plans were ruined.
...
*CLANG
Lilith and Druella were the last two in the throne room. There weren't any guards, or any maids.
"Mother..." Druella tried to say.
"Do you have any idea what you've DONE?! I've been trying to get Eros to join me for CENTURIES! And you PROTEST?! You fool! I thought you were more mature than this!" Lilith exclaimed.
"But mother, Michael..." Druella tried to say.
"I don't care what he wants, or what you want!" Lilith exclaimed angrily.
*Flick!
*BOOOOOOM!
The side of the castle exploded into a cloud of dust as Lilith flicked Druella away with her finger. Michael and all the attendees to the summit looked out the nearest windows towards the dust cloud.
"I think I'm on my own now." Michael thought.
...
..
.
Sherry and Michael ended up in some sort of café in the courtyard of the castle. While there, they were served tea and sandwiches. But despite the deliciousness of their lunch, they sat in brooding silence. Neither of them could muster so much as a tiny sliver of a smile. Every time Michael looked upwards towards the massive hole in the side of the castle, he felt even more depressed. There had been no sign of Druella since he last saw her in the summit room.
"She got drop kicked into the ocean. No doubt. If Lilith would make her blast off for not eating her veggies, then she definitely would do it for trying to ruin the treaty she's wanted for so long. I wonder if she'll punt me too. Will I survive?" Michael thought.
...
"I think maybe... we really should go home." Sherry said quietly.
"Can we?" Michael asked quietly.
Sherry's eyes wandered downward, avoiding his gaze. It seemed that her answer... was no.
...
"What confuses me the most is her second demand. What does she want with you?" Sherry asked quietly.
"I don't know. Maybe they want another crack at turning me into their double agent?" Michael reasoned quietly.
"It would make sense. Your arrival effectively ends the war for the Order. With you on Lilith's side, the humans here could never hope to stop us." Sherry said quietly.
"So that's why she made that demand. It put the final nail in the coffin. When I say no, and I'm absolutely saying no, then any chance of an alliance with Lilith is done. The Order has won." Michael said quietly.
...
"Don't look now, but the cupid is behind you." Sherry whispered.
Michael took a drink, trying to act normal. The liquid, which had tasted fantastic a minute ago, grated tastelessly across his tongue.
"What is she doing?" Michael whispered.
"She sat down at a table, and she's ordering something. She's... staring at you." Sherry whispered.
Michael's back stiffened slightly. Gulping down the last of his drink, he threw a few coins on the table for a tip and got up to leave.
...
They returned to the castle interior, where they hoped to disappear amongst the unending halls and countless rooms of the Royal Makai. Michael ducked into the grand library the maids had showed them on the tour earlier. As they disappeared into the rows of books, Michael spotted the cupid following them into the library.
"Gees, it's like being followed by a CIA agent." Michael muttered.
"What's that?" Sherry asked quietly.
"Nevermind. Let's try hiding over there." Michael said softly.
They went through the rows of books, and ended up in a quiet spot in a very obscure corner of the massive library.
"I think we finally lost her. She went down that western wing. What a pain in the ass." Michael muttered.
Sherry reached over and squeezed his shoulder.
"Whatever happens, I'll be by your side. I shan't allow anything foul to happen to you." Sherry reassured.
"Thanks. I appreciate that. I'm not too big to admit... I'm in neck deep here. I was neck deep before all this Eros bullshit started." Michael whispered.
"How so?" Sherry questioned.
"When was the last time you handed a box of chocolates to a god? Much less a room full of gods?" Michael asked softly.
"Never." Sherry said softly.
"I'm way out of my league. I shouldn't even be here." Michael said quietly.
Her eyes trailed downwards, and then left to right.
"There's some books here. Why don't we read a few and wait for the summit to resume? It might help calm us." Sherry suggested.
"You're not going to give me head like last time?" Michael asked softly.
"I'm so unnerved right now, I've lost all desire to do anything." Sherry whispered.
Michael's eyebrows nearly shot off his forehead. Of course he knew his situation was serious, but Sherry losing the desire for lewdness really put things into perspective. It unnerved Michael all that much more.
"Okay... books. Sure." Michael said quietly.
Sitting down in some padded chairs, they picked up some random books that were laying around. Despite what seemed like a very interesting book in his hands, Michael was simply going through the motions of reading without actually reading. His mind was troubled, thinking about the implications of the summit, and holding his own personal beliefs up in comparison.
"Are they really gods, or are they just incredibly powerful beings? What is a god? Surely they deserve respect, as anyone of true power deserves respect. But worship? I don't think so." Michael thought.
He mulled over what he was going to do when he walked back into that summit room. Ultimately, he decided that no matter what, there were going to be some angry divinities in the near future.
End of Part 1. Please continue to Part 2.