Early in the morning, Sayuri Mayugorô checked for the last time the cloth package containing the change of clothes and the bento box with the onigiri rice balls she would take to her son Goro. She closed it with a knot, and stared at it as she thought about her next steps.
She felt tired. Distress had kept her from sleeping the night before, so as soon as her husband went to his cobbler's workshop early in the morning, she finished as quickly as she could her morning chores and got things ready to go out secretly.
What was going on with Goro, why did they have to be going through these hardships in such a remote place lost in the mountains? These questions pricked at Sayuri's mind without pause. She took the bundle and stood up, hugging it, as if it were a small child, and closed her eyes, clinging to it. Images came to her mind of her childhood in Edo, at that time when her life was happy and simple. An additional pang of pain and melancholy crossed her chest.
When she met her husband and married, she had always dreamed of teaching her children to read and write. But her dreams were cut short with her older siblings. She was never able to teach them. Her first child was in diapers when they had to struggle to survive the tragedy of the great Edo fire of the Meiwa era, which forced her fledgling family to leave the city, never to return. They thus spent several years moving from one city to another without finding a place to settle down, until her husband found a job as a craftsman in the city of Minamisoma, north of Edo. And just when it seemed that things were going to get better, they barely managed to survive the great Tenmei famine. The family managed to survive this time by escaping southward, where they finally found shelter in the Hida area, arriving at the remote village of Itomori. It was a village lost in the mountains, but it had brought the family some prosperity and tranquility. It was only there that she was able to devote time to educating her children, especially Goro, the youngest of her sons.
Sayuri dreamed that Goro would be a well-educated man, like the members of her father's family in Edo, and to this day her son had lived up to her efforts and expectations. Until the night before, when she was informed that her son had been caught as a criminal.
To crown her anxieties, her husband's response left her even more worried.
She had raised Goro differently from his older siblings. That the boy could read and write made her siblings resent him and consider him conceited. In addition, Goro had not developed a favorable attitude for the family's manual labor, which caused him to have constant clashes with his father. And now this incident seemed to be the straw that broke the camel's back.
When the two servants from Miyamizu Shrine showed up the night before to talk to her husband, telling them that they had caught Goro as a criminal, the frustration and contempt she heard in her husband's voice for Goro made her shudder. Was he going to disinherit him? Was Yamazaki going to expel him from the family?
But there was one question that ached in her heart more than anything else: What was the reason the son she adored was doing all that? Had he gone mad? Where had she gone wrong as a mother to make her son turn into a ruffian overnight?
She opened her eyes, and wiped away the tears she realized were falling down her cheeks. Taking a deep breath, she wiped her face with a handkerchief, put her hair back together and prepared to sneak out of the house.
When she peeked outside the door, she was blinded by the brightness outside. The morning was bright, but many gray clouds covered most of the sky. Her eyes adjusted just as she saw Sumi, her youngest daughter, sneaking up on her and looking in all directions as she came to her side.
"Father is in the workshop. I told him everything you told me, Mom: that we're going to the market and that we had a lot of shopping to do. Oh, and that we were going to be late."
"I knew you could do it," said Sayuri.
She was unable to hide the pride in her voice for her youngest daughter.
"Did he suspect anything?"
"I don't think so, but he looked grumpier than usual."
"Here, take the package and go out the back of the house without your father or brother seeing you. I'm going out the front. Wait for me on the road where you can't see the house anymore."
"Yes, Mom."
Sumi took the small bundle, and taking one last look around, walked downhill toward the lake to the bottom of the lot, turning around behind the bathhouse, where there was a trail leading up through the trees behind the family's group of houses, until she reached the road.
Sayuri followed her daughter with her eyes until she disappeared behind the bathhouse. «She is turning into a beautiful woman» thought Sayuri. At barely 15, Sumi was fast approaching the age where she might be ready for marriage. Had she raised her well? Or like Goro, might she be on the verge of a tragedy?
Sayuri shook her head trying to shake off those negative thoughts that plagued her again and again. No, she couldn't get sucked into speculation. She would go beg the shrine servants to let her see her son, and then she would talk to him. She knew her son was not a criminal. Her mother's heart told her that couldn't be true.
§
Dawn had come to Miyamizu Shrine in a state of false tranquility. The male servants of the shrine went about their usual duties: some attended to the few worshippers who visited the shrine early morning, others cleaned the courtyards. Only a couple of young Miko priestesses were in sight.
At that same hour, most of the shrine women were frantically active in the residence of the high priest Hiroshi Miyamizu, out of sight of visitors, helping Kyomi Miyamizu, who was struggling to give birth.
Hiroshi had been sleepless all night with his wife. Mrs. Narumi and the rest of the shrine women had also been up all night attending the birth. But despite all their efforts, the baby could not be born.
At a moment when Kyomi's pains and contractions had a pause, Mrs. Narumi took Hiroshi by the arm and took him with her out of the room, to talk to him without Kyomi hearing them.
"Kaisho, I think things are getting worse and worse," indicated Mrs. Narumi in a reserved way, unable to hide the concern in her voice.
"What's the matter now?"
"The baby refuses to turn and so it can't come down. The bad thing is, if it is not born soon, the baby and Kyomi-san are in danger."
"They could..."
"She could die. And with her, so could the baby."
Hiroshi clenched his fists and felt a growl of helplessness rise in his throat, and he could barely stop it.
"Please help and save Kyomi and the baby. I beg you, Narumi-san."
"I and the girls are doing everything we can. But your wife's condition is getting worse. The next few hours will decide everything."
Hiroshi, turned for a second, looking at the shrine buildings. The prayer pavilion was in the background of his view.
A loud groan from inside the room interrupted his thoughts, but solidified the idea born in his mind. It pained him to walk away from his wife at this instant, but as a man he could do nothing more here. However, he was the high priest of the Miyamizu Shrine, and there were things only he in that position could do.
"Narumi-san, I will go to the prayer pavilion. I will perform a recovery ceremony for Kyomi. Please advise that no one is to interrupt me for any reason, except if there is news about her."
"I will do so, Hiroshi-sama."
Hiroshi left his residence and made his way first to the library pavilion, where he found Keitaro. He took him immediately to the prayer pavilion, where together they began the healing ceremony for his wife, behind closed doors.
Hiroshi's heart was set on one thing: he knew that only the gods can change reality, and Musubi was the protector of the Miyamizu. They had a pact with Shitori-no-Kami, and their god could not abandon them at this instant. Not now.
§
Sayuri and Sumi fearfully climbed the stairs of the Miyamizu shrine, uncertain of how they would be received. When they reached the main concourse of the shrine, they saw few people wandering around, scattered among the buildings. It was still very early in the morning.
Not knowing who to talk to, Sayuri took her daughter's hand and approached an old man dressed in the garb of the shrine's servants. The man watched with a peaceful face the flow of people, with his hands behind him, like a living statue. When the women were already a few meters away from him, the old man smiled at them in a friendly way.
"Good morning, Madam and Miss, is this your first visit to the shrine?"
"Good morning. I am Mayugorô Sayuri. I am the mother of Mayugorô Goro. Some servants from the shrine visited my house last night and told me that you have him here. I beg you to please let me see him!"
Sayuri and Sumi bowed deeply, and stood bowing before the old man.
The old man opened his eyes in surprise at the unexpectedness of the situation.
"Well, well. My name is Ishida Koba, I am in charge of the shrine, but I am afraid you are coming at a bad time, Sayuri-san. I can't authorize you to see the boy..."
The women sat up and looked at the old man with compunction.
"But... then, please take us to the high priest..."
"He cannot see you at this moment either," interrupted Mr. Koba, waving his hand vehemently. "He is in a ceremony that cannot be stopped, and I have orders not to interrupt him for anything."
"But... who can we talk to? Is the high priest's wife here? She's a mother like me, isn't she? She will know what a mother has to do for a son. Please let me at least talk to her! Ishida-san, please!"
The woman and her daughter bowed to the old man again, and remained in that motionless position, in complete submission.
Mr. Koba did not know what to answer them. He knew that Kyomi Miyamizu was at that very moment struggling to have a baby, that the two Miyamizu priests were locked in the prayer pavilion. There was no one who could authorize such a visit, but the thought of seeing those women off, with the look of anguish on their faces, tightened his throat.
Then he realized that there was indeed one person who could decide that, although he knew that the high priest would probably scold him later. But his feeling of compassion was stronger than the fear of his leader's scolding.
"Look, I'm going to consult your request with someone," said Mr. Koba approaching Sayuri, and motioning with his hand for her to stand up again.
"Please wait here until I return."
"Thank you, Ishida-san, thank you! We will wait for you... Thank you!"
Mr. Koba started walking towards the high priest's house. At the back of the courtyard, he met one of his sons, whom he sent to the front to cover his task of watchman, while he went in search of the only person who was available: Hanako Miyamizu. As heiress of the clan, only she could authorize that the boy's mother could see him.
When he was almost at the high priest's house, Mr. Koba realized that what he had just thought had a serious problem: if Hanako was romantically involved with that boy, was it wise to ask her to make that decision?
He paused hesitantly trying to clear his thoughts. After debating with himself for a while, he decided to leave it in her hands; he was just an old man, and no one could deny him the right to be compassionate.
He entered the high priest's residence through the side corridor that led to the rooms. No sooner had he taken a few steps than he heard loud groans of pain coming from the back of the house; he knew the timing could not have been more inopportune. But he saw that outside the room, sitting in the hallway and hugging her legs, was Kaori Miyamizu.
The girl was crying silently. Mr. Koba approached her uncomfortably, but grateful to find her. Her being there would make things easier for him.
The girl raised her head when she saw him approaching. She jumped up and hugged the old man, beginning to cry bitterly, speaking between sobs.
"K-Koba-san Is my mother... going to be alright? Is she... going... to be… alright?"
Mr. Koba didn't know how to react for a second to the unexpectedness of the hug, but then he returned it, stroking the girl's head to reassure her.
"Kao-chan, if my wife and the other women have been helping your mother, everything must be fine, you have to be patient."
"But… but they won't let me in! They say I'm too young..."
A new moan from Kyomi, louder than the previous one made them both look to the closed room.
Kaori was silent for a second, almost out of breath. The girl was about to burst into tears again, so Koba-san separated from her and grabbed her by the shoulders trying to make her look only at him.
"Kaori-san, Kaori-san! Listen to me, you have to be strong right now. Remember everything your parents have taught you. You are brave, so have hope, everything will be alright. Do you understand me?"
The girl stared at the old man, and only nodded her head. The old man continued.
"But... now I have to ask you to do something for me. Do you know where your sister is?"
"She's inside, helping my mother."
"Could you please call her out? I need to talk to her."
"Do I have to...? -Can I come in?"
"Just for a second. Just call her for me, will you? I can't even look out right now."
The girl nodded. She wiped her face as best she could, and paused for a second at the door, hesitant. After taking a big breath of air, she slid the door open until she could look inside and stuck her head in.
"Hana-chan, Hana-chan! Koba-san needs you out here..."
"What? I'll be right there," she heard from inside the room.
The girl closed the door, her eyes wide in shock. What little she had seen inside had left her pale. She looked back at the old man, and she only managed to walk over to him and hug him again, clinging to him, but unable to do or say anything else.
Mr. Koba felt guilty for how bad the girl was now, but the damage was already done. He merely kept stroking her head to comfort her for the long seconds that passed until the door slid open again. Hanako came out.
The girl was disheveled and haggard, her eyes red and puffy. Her face showed clear signs of exhaustion. She had been up all night with her mother. She looked at Mr. Koba and Kaori, and approached them.
Kaori heard her coming, and now jumped into her sister's arms, awakened.
"Hanako! What's wrong with mom? Is she going to be alright?"
"Shhhh, easy, sis, easy. Mom is going to be alright; she has to be alright"
Hanako's eyes began to fill with tears, but she struggled to hold herself back and show strength for her sister.
"Hanako-sama," interrupted Mr. Koba. "I'm sorry to bother you at this time, but I need to consult with you about something."
"What is it?"
Hanako looked at him intrigued.
"Neither you father nor you uncle, and obviously your mother, are available at this moment, to consult with them something important. And you, as the heir of the clan, are the only person available..."
Hanako's gaze became even more quizzical.
"Is something wrong with the shrine?"
"No. That is, yes. Mayugorô Goro's mother just showed up at the shrine, requesting permission to see him. You... Do you authorize her to see her son?"
Hanako widened her eyes and gaped. Then she looked down and blushed like a tomato, unable to answer.
"Hanako-sama, what should I answer?" insisted Mr. Koba.
"Is she here?" answered Hanako worriedly, looking down the hall, thinking that maybe Goro's mother was a few meters away from them.
"She came with a girl who must be her daughter, and asked to speak to your father and mother. I had to tell her it was not possible, and... there is only you left. I left them waiting in the main courtyard, near the steps of the sanctuary. Do you want me to call her to talk to you?"
"No! I... I can't!"
Kaori broke away from her sister to look at her, quizzical. Hanako couldn't respond to her sister's gaze except to become even more nervous.
"I just..., Koba-san, I can't, how can I look them in the face and tell them that... tell them that...?"
Koba-san realized that his earlier intuition was fatefully correct: Hanako Miyamizu would not be able to make an impartial decision regarding the boy. But he did not need to expose the high priest's daughter to a face-to-face with the boy's mother. So, he interrupted her, trying to calm her down and thus settle the matter once and for all.
"Hanako-sama, it is not necessary for you to talk to her, but tell me: What your decision is? She is waiting for your answer at the entrance of the shrine. If you authorize her, I will let them visit the boy, that's all."
Hanako's heart ached. She realized that the night the stress of seeing her mother suffering and the uncertainty over her health had prevented her from even pausing to think about Goro. But now the precarious situation of the man she loved came rushing back into her consciousness, and the guilt she felt overwhelmed her.
Hanako wanted to go to see her beloved, she wanted to be the one to visit him, but she could not; her father's orders and her mother's state of health tied her to that room. Thick tears began to fall down her cheeks without her being able to hold them back any longer.
"Tell them that... that I authorize them, please Koba-san, tell them that I authorize them, and... and that I'm sorry, that I'm so sorry."
A new moan of pain from Kyomi from the next room interrupted the conversation. Hanako quickly wiped the tears from her face, and tried to pull herself together. She placed a hand on her sister's head, and tried to show herself as best she could as a confident older sister.
"Kaori, you have to be strong. Promise me you're going to be strong, okay? Wait out here, I'll let you know how mom is doing."
"Sister..." pleaded Kaori, trying to hold Hanako.
But Hanako needed to return to the room, so she separated from her sister as carefully as she could.
"Koba-san, thank you for consulting me. Then tell me how the visit from the family of... that boy's family turned out, and please tell me later how Goro's state of health is."
"I will do so, Hanako-sama. Kaori-sama, with your permission."
Mr. Koba turned around and started walking at a slow pace back to where he had left the Mayugorô women.
Hanako opened the door and disappeared back into her parents' room, leaving Kaori alone in the hallway again.
Kaori fell to her knees, and only managed to put her hands in front of her face, in a prayer position.
"Musubi, please help my mother. Please help her..."
§
Goro's mind was tired. The interview with the shrine priests during left him mentally exhausted. He felt guilty for having given away his relationship with Hanako. Why was he so weak? Did he deserve to be with a woman like Hanako? Such a question haunted him throughout the night.
At some point in the night the pain in the back of his head began to increase. He felt his body very hot, and the room very cold. He tried to cover himself with an old blanket left for him by the guard accompanying him. But his shivering would not stop. With his teeth chattering, he tried to sleep, but his feverish mind brought only disjointed images, and distressing nightmares.
In some dreams he saw Hanako being torn from his arms by people dressed in shrine robes, being beaten by all of them without him being able to stop them; in other dreams he saw first Hanako's father humiliating him: "You are nothing, you are unworthy of my daughter." Suddenly the man's face would change to that of his own father: 'You are a disgrace to the family'. Everything became dark, while he felt hands pointing at him, insulting him, belittling him for his audacity to want to be with a woman like Hanako...
At times he would wake up, only to shiver coldly again, falling back into those dreams. Again, and again.
Suddenly he realized that the whole room around him was spinning and spinning uncontrollably. He closed his eyes, but the feeling of dizziness did not leave him.
Just when he felt that he was no longer going to endure all the spinning, a sudden sense of peace and lack of movement relieved his discomfort. He felt his body light, and the sensation of lying against the hard, cold ground disappeared. He opened his eyes to discover that he was once again in that strange rocky spot. And the rock dragon, with its fiery red eyes stared at him.
The surprise left him motionless. After a few seconds he wanted to move, but his body did not respond. He could only see the dragon, until those red eyes occupied his whole mind. And then, he heard it again inside his head, in a hoarse and guttural voice.
"ARE YOU... ARE YOU... AN ENEMY OF THE MIYAMIZU?"
His own voice sounded unsure, but he didn't know if it was his own voice or if it was his thoughts somehow reaching the dragon.
"They are not my enemies; I love their daughter..."
"I CAN... READ YOU... THEY... HATE YOU... THEY... DESPISE YOU!"
Goro wanted to cry. The memory of the shrine's priests telling him he was not worthy of her came back to his memory like a slap in the face. He wanted to answer something... but anguish prevented him from articulating anything. He looked at his hands. He was just an apprentice craftsman. He was not from a noble family associated with the feudal lord like the Miyamizu; neither he was someone associated with the Bakufu. He was a nobody...
"HAHAHA... YOU'RE... AN INSECT... TO THEM. THEY DESPISE YOU. THEY WILL ALWAYS DESPISE YOU, JUST AS THEY DID... WITH ME."
Goro felt rage begin to flood him. It was true. He was despised, and the woman he loved was the only one who valued him. Only her.
"YOU WILL LOSE HER. THE MIYAMIZU... WILL TAKE YOU AWAY FROM HER. YOU ARE... NO ONE TO THEM. YOU ARE... NOTHING."
"No!" Goro protested. "She loves me. I love her! We're going to make it..."
"HAHAHA... DELUDED... YOU HAVE... NO... POWER. YOU HAVE... NO CHANCE..."
Helplessness began to eat away at Goro. That dragon was taunting him. Deepening his pain. The rage in him only increased.
"We're going to make it! They won't be able to separate us!"
"YOU... ARE... USELESS... THEY'VE ALREADY GOT YOU. THEY'VE ALREADY... DISCARDED YOU. SCUM... FOR THEM YOU ARE... SCUM. BUT... I... I... CAN GIVE YOU... POWER."
Goro's mind stopped. Who was this dragon? Could I help him?
"HAHAHAHA. YOU ARE SO SIMPLE. YOU DON'T KNOW... WHAT... I'M CAPABLE OF. DO YOU WANT TO HAVE IT? DO YOU WANT TO GET... OUT OF THE WAY OF THOSE WHO... DEPRECIATE YOU? I HAVE... THAT POWER..."
"How? -Tell me how I can do it!"
"JOIN ME... LET ME... HELP YOU... IF YOU ACCEPT ME... I WILL REMOVE THOSE MEN... FROM YOUR WAY... AND SHE WILL BE YOURS... SHE WILL BE YOURS ALONE... NO ONE WILL BE ABLE... TO OPPOSE... NO ONE WILL BE ABLE... TO FACE OUR POWER!"
"Can we be together? -Can I be with Hanako?"
"THAT WOMAN... IS THAT ALL YOU... WANT? DON'T YOU ASK MORE... FROM A GOD?"
Suddenly Goro felt an icy fear. The fear that he was talking to a dragon had been put on the back burner, but who was this dragon? What was this dragon?
Although he did not feel his own body, he felt something in him shiver and shrivel in the presence of this being. After a few seconds, Goro's question reflected a fear he had never felt before. He lowered his gaze reverentially, unable to look at the dragon.
"Are you...? Are you a god?"
"HAHAHA... I AM GOD... I AM... THE GOD OF THE HEAVENS... I AM BEAUTIFUL AND POWERFUL. EVERYONE LOOKS UP TO ME... I AM THE GOD... THAT EVERYONE SHOULD FEAR... BUT... THE MIYAMIZU... THEY MOCKED... ME... THEY BELITTLED ME... JUST LIKE THE DID TO YOU... BUT MY TIME IS COMING BACK... JOIN... ME... AND LET's GET... WHAT IS OURS."
"So... if you are a god... can you make me powerful?"
"I WILL GIVE YOU THE POWER... THE POWER... TO DESTROY... THOSE WHO OPPOSE YOU... THE POWER... TO GET... WHAT YOU WANT..."
"I want... that power. I want to be with her!"
"WELL... HUMAN... WHEN I LOOK FOR YOU... I WILL GIVE YOU POWER... AND WE WILL BOTH GET... WHAT WE WANT... WE WILL GET... WHAT WE WANT... AME-NO-KAGASEO WILL WIN... IN THE END... I AM POWER... I WILL GIVE YOU... POWER..."
Goro could only see those red eyes in his mind. Power... power, he needed power.
The dragon's image and voice faded into darkness, until another voice began to come into his consciousness... along with a feeling of cold and pain.
"Goro?... Goro! Son, please wake up! Goro!"
A woman's voice invaded his consciousness. He knew that voice. His eyes felt heavy, but suddenly he felt he could move again. He could open his eyes with difficulty.
There she was. It was his mother, holding him by the shoulders, gently rocking him, tears in her eyes. Behind her, over his mother's shoulders he saw his little sister, Sumi, looking at him with fear and worry painted on her face.
For a second he didn't know where he was. Why was she crying? Why was she looking at him like that? He wanted to sit up, but felt that his hands were tied. He tried to look at them and then an unfamiliar room greeted him. Then the memory of where he actually was, came to his mind like a sledgehammer that broke him. And he began to cry like a little child.
"Mo-mother, I... forgive me... I didn't... want this... to... happen Forgive me! I didn't want... I... didn't want you to see me... like that."
Goro kept sobbing, shivering. The cold he felt made him shiver again.
Sayuri noticed that, and reached out to touch the boy's cheeks and realized that they were burning. Fearfully she touched his neck again, and his chest. Hot. Her son was burning with fever. She turned around indignantly and spoke to someone behind her back.
"Ishida-san! What did you do to my son? Why is he burning in fever?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't know your son was like this," replied an old man standing near the door. He turned to the guard next to him.
"Koichi, why didn't you warn him about this?"
"I didn't know either, Koba-san," the guard replied apologetically. "The women didn't come to check on him during the night, and I didn't know he was like this... I just watched that nothing unusual happened..."
"Please help him! Ishida-san, please help my son, can you bring some cloths and cool water? We need to bring down his fever!"
"Koichi, can you bring what the lady asked for?" replied the man, looking at the guard.
"Yes, Koba-san. I'll go get some water and some cloths."
The man disappeared at the door, while the old man sighed wearily.
"I am very sorry for this situation. You don't know what a difficult time this shrine is going through."
"Why is my son's head bandaged?"
"Last night he was caught wandering around the shrine when one of the shrine maidens was missing. We thought he was a delinquent, and he ran off like one, without explanation. So, we chased him and caught him. Then he resisted, and one of my men hit him on the head. Our women cured him and treated his wound. But we didn't know he had a fever."
"Goro, why?" said the woman in anguish, turning to her son.
"You don't know why he came to the shrine last night?" asked Mr. Koba to the mother.
"No, I don't know..."
"I think you and him have a pending conversation then. I'll go outside so you can talk to your son alone. Call me if you need me."
Mr. Koba bowed slightly, left the room and closed the door behind him.
The woman turned to her son with more anguish than before. Doubt gnawed at her.
"Son, what's going on? What were you doing here last night?"
Goro shrank back in another shudder. He could not look at his mother, and could only sob, embarrassed.
"Goro?" insisted his mother.
Then an unexpected voice came from behind her.
"Brother, did you come for that woman?" said Sumi, in a hoarse voice, with a hint of resentment.
Sayuri turned in surprise to look at her daughter.
"What woman are you talking about?"
"I... I have seen Goro frequenting a woman at the shrine. He used to sneak around talking to one of them. I saw him several times when he went to the market to buy things."
Sayuri froze. She turned again to her son, who only looked at her in embarrassment.
"Is... that true? Goro, I'm your mother. Tell me the truth! Did you come here for a woman?"
"Mom... I... yes, I came for a girl. Forgive me, I didn't want to worry you... but we love each other... she loves me..."
"Why didn't you ever tell me! Sumi, you should have told me!"
"I...".
The girl looked at the floor, ashamed.
"My brother asked me not to tell you..."
"Goro! How could you get your sister involved in something like this? And who is this girl? Do I know her?"
Goro brought his hands to his face, trying to cover it. He felt kind of naked and, especially, humiliated by his mother's questions. He didn't want to go through that interrogation again.
"N-no. I don't think..."
"Who is her? Goro, answer!"
"She is... Miyamizu Hanako."
Sayuri put her hands to her mouth and gasped in surprise.
"Miyamizu? That's...? She's the high priest's daughter?"
Goro could only answer by shaking his head slightly in the affirmative.
"Son!... How...? Do you realize that you could have been killed in this place? If your father finds out..."
Suddenly Mr. Koba's words came to Sayuri's mind: '...one of the maidens was missing...'. She froze in surprise and fear at the revelation.
"Goro, last night did you see that girl? Did you do something to her?"
"No, mom, I love her, I would never hurt her..."
"Son, did you do something to the high priest's daughter? Tell me the truth!"
"No, mom! I just want to be with her, but I've never dishonored her!"
"Sumi, get out of the room and wait outside!" suddenly ordered Sayuri to her daughter."
"What? But mom..."
"Sumi, please! I need to talk to your brother alone."
The girl responded with a disapproving snort, but obeyed, reluctantly leaving.
"Don't go too far, but wait for me outside, Sumi."
"Yes, Mom," replied the girl, discouraged, leaving the room.
When the girl left, Sayuri looked at the boy with sorrow. A tear began to fall down her cheek.
"Son, do you understand what are you doing?"
"I understand that we love each other, Mom."
"She's the high priest's daughter! The Miyamizu control these lands, and answer to Daimyo! For this you are doing, we could be expelled from this land, or worse!"
"Mom, I love Hanako, and she loves me. Can't you at least support me? Why does everyone want to separate us?"
"Son, I..."
Sayuri looked at the ceiling of the room, trying to control the tears that wanted to run wild. She took a deep breath, until she pulled herself together. Then she spoke to him in a low tone, her eyes lost in old memories.
"Goro, I... I come from a family that was once powerful. I had uncles who even worked for the Bakufu at Edo. But the family fell from grace. Since then, I've had to live on the run from that disgrace. And that's why I know how power works, Goro. Now we are just... a family of artisans. We are the Mayugorô family. You should be proud of your family, but... to the powerful, we are just servants, we are inferior to them. You can't meddle with them. We can't!"
"Mom, what about how we feel? How she feels about me? How I feel about her! Doesn't that matter?"
Sayuri looked at her son sadly. A lump formed in her throat. She wanted her son's happiness so much, but he had just chosen a happiness that was beyond her reach. Watching him suffer hurt her heart, and it hurt twice as much to have to be the messenger of a reality that was going to tear him apart even more.
"Goro... son... you are young, and you don't understand, but... just because you love each other doesn't change anything. It doesn't change that she can't be for you. She can't be your wife. And if her family objects, there's nothing you, your father, or I can do about it. They could have us expelled from this land. And all that we have achieved would be lost. Do you want to be the shame and disgrace of the family?"
Goro looked at his mother and upon hearing her words, he felt his world go black. Tears of helplessness began to flow. The pain in his head took a back seat as his chest began to ache. He felt betrayed and alone.
The door to the room opened. Sayuri turned around trying to wipe her tears and hide her pain. She saw the guard that Mr. Koba sent, bringing some cloths peeking out of a pot, which apparently brought water. The man approached and set it down beside her.
"I am sorry for the delay. I'll leave this here for you." And he left.
Sayuri bowed her thanks to the man, and immediately took the cloths to wet them and put them on her son.
"Goro, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. But now the important thing is your fever. Later there will be time for you to understand. In time you will understand..."
But Goro was no longer listening. He just cried silently; no one appreciated him. Not even his own mother. Nobody did. He was useless without any power to influence his own destiny.
Power. He needed power. The image of red eyes looking at him, offering him power, filled his consciousness. Yes, the dragon god was right. He needed power. If he got it, everyone would respect him. His family, and especially the Miyamizu family. Everyone. And then nothing would stop him from being able to be with Hanako. No one would be able to oppose their love, when he got the power that the dragon god had promised him.