And another chapter (anyone still here reading it?).

The song to this is "It Will Rain" by Bruno Mars.

I don't own the characters or places!


In some ways, the next day was even worse than the previous one. All the Shadowhunters gathered at the Institute to investigate the case of the Herondale's. In Cordelia's opinion, throwing awful accusations at them would have been a better way to phrase it. Because that's what it was.

Actually, she didn't want to come to the meeting, already knowing that it would be awful. But in the end, Alastair had convinced her that attending was the right thing to do. After all, the Herondales were their friends. Lucie was going to be her Parabatai. And she was married to James. Her absence would only be another thing to wield against the family and it was the last thing Cordelia wanted.

So the followed her brother's advice, put on one of her dresses from Paris and let Risa do her hair. A little make up finished her look and she went outside with her head held high. She also entered the Institute that way, glaring at everyone who did so much as looking at her or the Herondales the wrong way. The meeting took place in the chapel, which made Cordelia feel grim. When they entered, she saw that Bridgestock, Charlotte and Will stood at the altar, all looking tense.

The Shadowhunters filled the pews and Cordelia scanned the room for her friends. James, Lucie and Jesse sat in the front row together with Tessa. When Cordelia caught Lucie's and James' eyes, she tried to look reassuring. Anna was also there, sitting together with her father and Ari. Apparently, Cecily was still in the infirmary with Alexander. She also saw Matthew sitting with Thomas and Christopher. Matthew's eyes were fixed on James, which wasn't a surprise. They were Parabatai, after all. But Thomas and Christopher looked towards them and both nodded grimly. Cordelia and, to her surprise, Alastair returned the gesture. Then they also sat down to listen to what was being said.

"The events in Cornwall have obviously disturbed me greatly." Bridgestock exclaimed. "All in combination with the claims of Tatiana Blackthorn, I must say that the failure to protect us from Belial has greatly shaken my trust in the Herondales' leadership." He glared at Will darkly. "Now, I am not necessarily saying that you are in league with demons."

"What a compliment." Will muttered coldly.

"But Tatiana Blackthorn certainly told the truth - that Belial is Tessa's father. A truth that has been concealed from all of us, all these years. Well," He looked at Charlotte sarcastically. "from most of us."

"This was all settled years ago." Charlotte replied calmly. "Tessa is a Shadowhunter in good standing, in addition to being a warlock. It is a situation unique to her, caused by a mundane with a specific ill intent, unlikely to ever be repeated. The identity of the demon who fathered her was not known to anyone, even to Tessa, until recently. And regardless, we do not believe warlocks to be in league with their demon parents."

And so the discussion continued and with every word that was spoken against the Herondales, Cordelia began to feel even more sick. But it was all nothing compared to the burning anger she felt when Charles suddenly stood up to talk against Will and Tessa. Against his family.

Cordelia's eyes instinctively searched for Matthew in the crowd and she noticed that his eyes were squeezed tight, as if he was trying to shut out everything around him. Beside him, Henry looked as if he was going to be sick, just like Thomas and Christopher on his other side. Only Charlotte stood motionless, but it was obvious how difficult it was for her.

Everything in Cordelia screamed that she should stand up and go to Matthew, comfort him in some way. But it wasn't possible. In public, they were friends. Nothing more. She couldn't do anything in this moment. It made her clench her fists tightly. But she would comfort him later. Once all this was over, she would talk to him. Make him feel better somehow.

She was about to join the discussion which grew louder with every minute when suddenly, someone touched her arm. Her first thought that it was Alastair, or maybe that Matthew had come. But then her eyes fell on Christopher. He'd left his seat unnoticed and looked at her intently. "Come with me." He muttered. "Quickly. No one will notice in all this fuss."

Cordelia glanced at Alastair next to her, but he looked just as clueless about Christopher's sudden appearance as she felt. "Christopher, I must speak for them -"

"If you truly want to help James, come with me. There is something you must know." It wasn't an easy decision, but the mentioning of helping James did it. He was still one of her closest friends, after all. And she had loved him at some point.

So Cordelia stood up and looked at her brother once more. "Keep an eye on Matthew." She whispered into his ear and only when he nodded in a silent promise did she follow Christopher out of the Institute.


When it became obvious that he was leading her towards the entrance of the Silent City, Cordelia looked at Christopher in surprise. "Where are we going?"

"To see someone." He said simply, continuing to walk without slowing down.

"In the Silent City? But who -" When it hit Cordelia, she stopped with wide eyes. It took Christopher a moment to notice that she wasn't next to him anymore and when he turned around, he looked surprised. "We're going to see Grace." Cordelia muttered and he nodded, as if it was the only logical explanation.

"Of course we're seeing Grace. Who else should we visit in the Silent City?"

"Why are we going to talk to Grace?" She demanded to know, her anger suddenly returning with full force. Not just at Grace and all the things she'd done. How James had always loved her and not Cordelia, only to declare that he'd never loved Grace at all. Also at all the horrible things that were going on at the Institute. She'd left with Christopher to help James. But how should talking to Grace Blackthorn achieve that?

"It will all makes sense once you talked to her." He let it sound like a promise. "There's something important she has to tell you. About her mother. And Belial."

"Belial…?" But Christopher had already started to walk again and Cordelia hurried to catch up with him. "Christopher, you're not making any sense."

"It will, if you talk to Grace."

So twenty minutes later, Cordelia was at the Silent City, waiting in front of Grace's cell. Christopher had insisted to talk to her first, saying that he didn't announce Cordelia's visit beforehand. That he'd even visited her before several times came as a surprise to her. But she didn't get a chance to ask. Especially not when Christopher called her inside and there she was. Grace Blackthorn, clad in a simple dress and looking smaller than ever before. In the dim light of the room, her skin looked deadly pale and even her hair was more white than blond.

"Cordelia." Grace's smile didn't reach her eyes. "I didn't know you'd be coming."

"I didn't now that I was going to visit you either." She glared at Christopher, but he just looked at them patiently.

"Tell her what you told me, Grace. About James."

So Grace did. She told Cordelia a story about her mother and Belial, and a power she possessed that made it possible for her to charm every man she wanted. To make them do the most ridiculous things for her. A power that worked on everyone but James. So that was the secret behind the bracelet he'd always worn. It had controlled him, made him believe he loved Grace. It was truly a horrible charm. From the way Christopher eyed Grace, she knew that he also wasn't happy about everything that happened.

"Who else knows about this?" Cordelia asked quietly after listening to her tale in silence.

"Jesse knows." Grace lowered her eyes. "I had to tell him. He didn't visit me again ever since."

That doesn't surprise me at all, Cordelia thought to herself. "So you want to tell me that James truly never loved you."

"He's always loved you." Grace swallowed. "It was only you, Cordelia."

Mere weeks ago, her heart would have bursted in joy at those words. Now, it only made her feel numb. It was even worse than the conversation she and James had at the Institute. She'd fallen out of love with him. Would it have changed anything, if she'd known all this sooner? That he'd loved her? Or would she still have fallen in love with Matthew in time? Brilliant, wonderful Matthew, who could love so openly. Unlike James, who always kept his feelings to himself. Even now that the spell on him was broken.

She couldn't regret what happened between her and Matthew. She didn't want it. She loved him, she knew that with a certainty that could have been scary. Yet it only made her feel warm. Alive. Something she didn't feel with James in a long time.

"Thank you for your honesty, Grace." Without waiting for a reply, Cordelia turned around and left the cell.


She wanted nothing more than to see Matthew. To head to his flat and see if he was all right. To talk to him about everything that happened. Maybe also tell him the terrible truth about James and the bracelet. But first, there was something else that needed to be done.

She found a runner and sent a message to the Institute, telling James to meet her at Curzon Street as soon as possible. She needed to confront him with this. Why did he lie to her for all this time? He'd known what the bracelet did ever since Cordelia ran off to Paris with Matthew. So why had he remained silent?

When she arrived at the house, James was already there, walking down the stairs when she entered. "Daisy, what's wrong?" There was concern in his eyes. "You said that it's urgent."

"You lied to me." She said, not even bothering to take off her coat after entering the warm rooms. "About Grace."

He frowned in confusion. "I have never lied to you -"

"The bracelet." Cordelia interrupted him firmly. "I went to see Grace in the Silent City and she told me everything. You knew, but yet you never said anything. Why?!"

He visibly paled when she mentioned the bracelet.

"Daisy…" He began, but stopped, most probably to collect himself for a moment. "I'm so sorry."

"She told you when we left for Paris. After that, there has been plenty of time. But you kept quiet, James." She knew she was staring at him accusingly, but she didn't care. All the anger that burned inside her wanted to get out. And it seemed as if James was her target. "I deserve to know why."

"I wanted to tell you. Several times." He ran a hand through his already messy hair. "But the moment was never right."

"Nonsense." Cordelia crossed her arms. "Why didn't you tell me? The truth, James. Not excuses."

"I didn't want your pity!" He nearly shouted in frustration and for a moment, it made her forget her anger. "I didn't want you to think I only told you all this to fix things. To make it right again. I wanted us to work again on ourselves. If there was ever a chance for us to work again."

Now it was her turn to frown. "What do you mean by that?"

"Don't you think I didn't notice the way you look at Matthew? The way he looks at you, Daisy? You're not even wearing the necklace anymore." He gestured at her, the place where the small globe would have been. "Something changed between the two of you at the Christmas party." He inhaled deeply. "And it's killing me. Lying to you was horrible, I wanted to tell you so many times. To tell you that I love you. That I've always loved you, I just didn't realise -"

"You couldn't have known." She interrupted him firmly. "It wasn't your choice, James."

"But if I'd realized what the bracelet did sooner -"

"It might not have changed anything." Cordelia felt as if her heart was breaking when she saw the desperation on James' face. "I might have realized my feelings for Matthew anyway, one way or another."

His shoulders sunk at her words and he sat down on the stairs behind him. Well, he rather sank down on them, as if all his strength had left him. "You love him." His voice was barely a whisper.

"I do." She hesitated. "I also loved you. So much. But James -"

"Then give me another chance. Daisy…" He looked at her through pleading eyes. "When I say that I love you now, I mean it. I've never meant it more. I know we didn't have the best start, with Grace and everything that happened, but -"

"No." Just a simple word, but James looked like she'd hit him. "I can't, James." It pained her to say the words. "This marriage, it's not real. It has never been real. Too much has happened."

"Daisy…" He looked like he wanted to reach out to her, but he didn't move.

"I'm sorry." She felt a wetness on her face and realized that she was crying. "You were all I've ever wanted for so long. But things change. People change." She hesitated. "Everything that happened since I came to London surely has changed me."

"You're still the same you always were." James argued. "Brace, and fierce, and beautiful. You're a true warrior."

She laughed dryly. "We both know that it's not true. Not anymore."

"We'll find a way out of it. You'll be free of her again. And then you can wield Cortana again in the way you always did." He let it sound like a promise. How could he say such things, right after she broke his heart?

"I never wanted to hurt you." She admitted quietly.

"I've hurt you first. So many times." He looked down in guilt. "It's all my fault that it turned out to this."

"No, it's Belial's. And Tatiana's. And in some way also Grace's." She said fiercely. "Not yours, James. It was never yours." Cordelia fought back the urge to close the distance between them and take his hands. It would feel like betraying Matthew in so many ways. "Don't even think such a thing."

"I wonder how it would have turned out if you never left for Paris with Matthew." James muttered. "If your feelings were different."

"We shouldn't be discussing what-if's." She muttered. "James, I think I should go."

"Back to Cornwall Gardens?" He stood up from where he sat on the stairs.

"First, I have to see how Matthew is doing." Cordelia reached for the front door. They'd never left the entrance hall. "Charles' betrayal must weigh heavily on him. I hope Alastair, and maybe also Thomas could prevent him from doing something stupid."

"Alastair?" James echoed, surprise on his face.

"I asked him to keep an eye on him." She said with a nod.

"Your brother knows about you and Matthew?" There was disbelief in his eyes.

"I think that's none of your concern." Cordelia said mildly. "Good night, James." Then she left, walking into the night.


To her surprise, it was indeed Alastair who opened the door to Matthew's flat. He looked serious. "What's taken you so long, Layla?" He asked when he let her in and Cordelia shrugged off her coat.

"I had quite an interesting afternoon." She said simply and turned to where Matthew and Christopher were sitting close to the fireplace. Matthew's face lit up when he saw her, but there was also something else in his eyes. Cautiousness. He must have felt James' pain, she realized. She smiled at him and Cordelia felt relief wash over her when he returned the gesture. "How did the meeting end?"

"Don't ask." Alastair muttered. "We left shortly after you did."

"Where did you go, by the way?" Matthew asked curiously. "Alastair only said that you ran off with Christopher."

"He wanted to show me something." Cordelia said vaguely, hoping that he would understand that she didn't want to talk about it in front of Alastair and Thomas.

Matthew did, since he changed the subject quickly. Secretly, Cordelia also felt relieved that he was still sober after everything that happened earlier that day. Was it only due to Thomas' and Alastair's presence? Or did he find the strength for it himself? "I think the Inquisitor is blackmailing Charles."

Cordelia stared first at him and then at her brother and Thomas. They didn't look surprised, so they must have already discussed this. "How do you come to that conclusion?" She asked while she took a seat in one of the armchairs.

So Matthew told her the story about the letter Ariadne had found in the fireplace at her parents' house. A letter she'd given to Matthew. It was obvious that the Inquisitor was blackmailing someone, but it couldn't be directly read that Charles was meant. However, there were some things that indicated just that. Like the way Charles had acted in the morning.

"So you think that he's blackmailing him about… what exactly?" Cordelia asked in the end, frowning.

"Me." To her surprise, it was Alastair who spoke. "Or the fact that he likes men, to be more precise." She stared at her brother, unable to form words. He only laughed darkly. "Don't look so surprised, Layla. You knew it for quite some time now."

"That's not my problem. But Bridgestock… I always knew he's awful, especially after what happened with Ari, but that is just…" She shook her head in anger, not even able to put it into words.

"I'll try to talk to Charles." Matthew said. "Alastair and Thomas have offered to come with me. He won't listen to me alone, but maybe the three of us will be able to talk some sense into him."

"Do you think it will work?" To be honest, she wasn't completely convinced about it.

Matthew just shrugged. "It's worth a try."

"Charles has always been very stubborn." Alastair threw in. "And his reputation is very important to him. That could also be the reason why Bridgestock was even successful." He sighed deeply.

"I'm sure it will all work out." Thomas' words were directed at Alastair. He glanced at the clock and stood up. "I should head back home. I'm sure the others will be worried."

When Cordelia made no attempt to stand up with them, Alastair raised his eyebrows. "We'll wait downstairs." He said simply, probably sensing that she wanted a few moments alone with Matthew.

Thomas just looked between the two of them, clearly confused. "But what…?"

"Downstairs, Tom." Alastair grabbed his arm and pulled him towards the door. Thomas looked back in confusion once more, but then Alastair had already grabbed their coats and the door closed behind them with a thud.

For a few moments, Cordelia and Matthew looked at each other in silence, the only sounds in the room the cracking of wood in the fireplace. In the end, it was Matthew who spoke first. "You went to see James?"

She nodded slowly.

He grimaced. "I assume it wasn't a nice conversation." He placed a hand over his heart. "I felt his pain. Right here."

Cordelia sighed deeply. "I think I broke his heart." She felt guilty when she remembered the look on James' face.

"What did you tell him?" He asked quietly. "I mean, you don't have to tell me. I don't want to pry."

"Christopher took me to see Grace in the Silent City." She said. "She told me some quite interesting things. About James." So she summarised what Grace had said about the bracelet in short words. The longer she talked, the more anger appeared on Matthew's face.

"How dare she do something like that to him!" He exclaimed loudly. "I always knew there was something wrong about her, but I'd never dreamed that she would use such methods! Poor James. And I never even noticed it…" He shook his head, suddenly looking guilty.

Cordelia couldn't stand that look on his face. She stood up and crossed the distance to his armchair quickly. When she knelt down in in front of him and took his hands, his eyes met hers. "It's not your fault. Or anyone else's. There was a charm on the bracelet that everyone would forget about it again. You couldn't have done anything, Matthew."

"You confronted James with it." It wasn't a question.

"I wanted to know why he lied to me. If he knew about it ever since we went to Paris, there would have been plenty of time for him to say something."

"Yet he remained quiet. Probably because he didn't want your pity. Or that of anyone else." He didn't look surprised.

"Those were his words." She confirmed with a nod. "He also asked if it changed something, that I know he's never really loved Grace. That it was all a farce. A lie. I think he hoped it would make a difference."

"I wouldn't blame you if that's the case." Matthew had gone pale at her words. "I know you've always loved him, Cordelia."

"It doesn't change anything." She tightened her grip on Matthew's hands. "I love you, Matthew. You and no one else." She leaned closer so that their faces were only inches apart. "Don't doubt that for a second." And then she leaned in to kiss him. It was a slow kiss and Cordelia tried to put all her feelings for him into it. How much he meant to her. How glad she was that she'd found him. How much she desired him. Matthew kissed her back just as deeply and when she sighed into the kiss, he let go of her hands, only to wrap his arms around her waist and pull her onto his lap.

When they parted, they looked at each other with a smile. "I love you too." He whispered and placed another short kiss on her lips. "And we should probably move, otherwise your brother will really kill me."

She sighed. "I don't want to move."

His eyes darkened at this. "That's a dangerous thing to say, Daisy." The tone of his voice made her shiver.

"One day, we'll have all the time in the world." She promised him. "Then we don't have to pretend in front of others. There will be no more hiding."

"I like the sound of that." Reluctantly, he let go of her again and she stood up.

"How are you feeling? I felt bad for leaving after everything that Charles said."

"Don't feel guilty." He stood up as well and touched her cheek. "I'm fine. No urge to drink at all. And now it wouldn't be possible anymore anyway. Your brother threw away the last liquor I still had here. Right out of the window." He grinned at that.

That sounded so much like Alastair, Cordelia had to chuckle. "I'm glad."

"I will get over the addiction." Matthew whispered, running a finger along her cheekbone. "I know I can do it."

"I know you can, too." She smiled.

"We didn't tell you all the news. All the adults will leave for Idris tomorrow. And we should all gather at the Institute." A flicker of uneasiness passed over his features. Everyone. That would also mean James.

"He doesn't blame you for anything that happened." Cordelia muttered, not having to say the name. Matthew understood her anyway. "It will all work out somehow."

He sighed. "I hope you're right. I hate that something's standing between us. We're Parabatai. We should have each other's backs. Always."

"And you will again." You also need to tell him about your own secret, she thought but didn't voice the words. "Just have faith."

"Good night, Daisy." He whispered and just when she was about to leave the flat, he kissed her once more. She didn't stop him.