I got to know his brother-in-law and his sister Molly better at Christmas. We were summoned to you in the Burrow. As soon as we entered, we were standing in the eat-in kitchen. Even from the outside, the house looked extraordinary. There seemed to be many rooms on five rickety-looking floors. Inside there was a little sympathetic chaos. I couldn't have put it any other way. There were children's toys everywhere, two cats darted around, the children scurried about.

"Nice to have you here, darling. I mean, I already asked Arthur how you are. I was interested because Gideon is not easy to crack, you know? As his older sister, I would like to know if the woman in his life is a good match for him." Molly Weasley explained while shaking my hand enthusiastically. I had to grin. Gideon had already told me that his older sister was very motherly. But she didn't look me up and down, just looked into my eyes as if she could read there what she needed to know about me.

"I'm happy too, Molly. I know, he's special." I said and looked at the tall man next to me who was embracing his brother-in-law.

"How funny, he said the same thing about you, darling. I'm just wondering if he ever brought a woman for Christmas. And you're- STOP, Fred and George, stop pulling the cat's tail…!" She was gone towards her 2-year-old twins. Gideon winked at me and walked Arthur a little towards the bookshelf and fireplace to talk to him. He left me exposed to chaos to talk about new developments affecting the Order. I looked around and peering out from behind a chair was a boy of about eight.
"Hello, you're Charlie, right? I'm Catherine, nice to meet you." He looked at me with wide amber eyes and shyly approached me. Luckily, Gideon had told me everything I needed to know about his family beforehand. So does the age and appearance of his nephews.
"Yes, I'm Charlie. Are you… a Veela?", he asked uncertainly. I had to smile. He seemed well versed in giving compliments. Or jokes.

"No, I'm actually Muggleborn." I laughed. "What are you holding in your arms?" I pointed to his stuffed animal.
"It's an Antipodean Opal Eye! Uncle Gideon brought it for me from his vacation." I blushed briefly at the thought that Gideon was good with kids. What other hidden talents did he have?

"It's a species of dragon from New Zealand, isn't it?" Thank you for my Advanced Course on Magical Creatures with Professor Kesselburn!

"Yes." Charlie´s eyes shone. "You know about dragons?"
"A little bit." I replied as Molly collapsed into the chair next to us, exhausted.
"Oh, five sons and one is on the way. I've already told Arthur we're only going to try one more time. If it doesn't turn out to be a girl…"
She looked around for her second eldest son.
"Come on, Charlie, get your brothers Bill and Percy! We want to eat soon." Charlie nodded and darted to the upper floors.
"Can I help you, Molly?" I asked, looking at her big belly. It was probably only 3 months until the birth.
"No, I've already prepared everything, dear. But thanks. Tell me, are you planning children, too?" Her brown eyes matched Fabian's. She was staring at me now, trying to read my emotions on my face.

"We haven't thought that far yet..." I stammered and looked at Gideon, who at that moment gave me a wonderful look full of love and affection. So, why not?
"Oh, young love. I'm glad that Gideon has finally found this joy. But looking at you, I understand why he waited so long." she said with a knowing smile. I blushed. Yes, maybe we found each other. I looked at the man of my choice. His longer auburn hair fell to his green sweater. His eyes fixed me with a mischievous twinkle that I knew what he was thinking about. Yes, I had arrived, right?
"Although I always tell him he need a haircut.", said Molly und eyed me again from her side.
Before I could answer her, Fabian suddenly came through the door. Arthur stepped in front of him.
"A pleasant night today, wasn't it?" Each of us had an answer to that question to make sure it was really us and not a Death Eater.
"There could be rain.", Fabian replied quietly, he looked dejected as he answered the test question.
Then he sat in a corner and buried his face in his hands. While Molly prepared the meal and Arthur continued talking to Gideon, I sat down next to him.
"What's the matter, Fabian?" I ask and put my hand gently on his shoulder.
He looked at me, his eyes wet and swollen. He had apparently been crying.
"It's all ok. Just too much work." I recognized the lie from his mouth immediately, because I had used it myself many times in the past. And I knew from my own experience that it took friends and the truth to get through this. Nobody can do it alone.
"Fabian, please! Does it have anything to do with Regulus?" I asked quietly so that no one took any notice of our conversation. He lifted his head slightly and gave me a searching look.
"You know I can keep quiet if I have to." I smiled confidently at him. I hadn't revealed anything yet and he knew it, but he scanned the room.
"Not here." Fabian stood up and grabbed my hand. He pulled me out of the living room and we went into the garden. The ground was covered with frost and our feet were breaking it up with a strange sound. I was freezing because my warm coat was still hanging in the hallway.
"Sorry, too many inside are hearing our words," he whispered as we walked away from the Weasley Burrow. A small mountain nearby looked grey and bare.
"What is it, Fabian? I won't tell Gideon about Regulus, although I think he deserves the truth." My eyes met his.
"It doesn't really matter if he finds out because Regulus is probably dead by now." Tears ran down his freckled cheeks. I sucked in the cold air sharply. My thoughts raced, but I tried to stay calm.
"What? What makes you think that?" I asked, trying to sound confident, but my voice failed.

"Regulus wanted to harm Voldemort before he disappeared. Of course it would be better if Voldemort were completely destroyed. But as you know, no one has done it so far. So, Regulus wanted to get into the inner circle and give me information on how to defeat him. But he didn't show up at our agreed meeting point today. He didn't send a message either. I think… the worst." His voice was high and almost cracked. Tears welled up in his eyes again and he cupped his clenched fist to his mouth to keep from screaming. Damned.
"Are you sure? Couldn't he have forgotten, or-"
"No. Never. If he doesn't show up, it means something must have happened to him. Voldemort might have him... I mean, Regulus was into something he didn't want to tell me. Something that would stop Voldemort. When we last met, he said his house elf was with Voldemort and discovered a secret. Something that would change everything. I didn't understand what he meant. He was so excited. All I could do was warn him not to do anything rash. And now…" He couldn't go on speaking, his body convulsed as if an arrow had pierced him, he was in obvious pain. I took Fabian tightly in my arms. His tears fell onto my dress and we both shivered from the cold. A Death Eater who wasn't one and who was in love with Fabian - dead. Such a young human life... wiped out like so many others. And Fabian wasn't even allowed to mourn, because nobody was even allowed to know about his feelings. What a crap! I could only hold him at that moment. But I knew he was just as broken as Dorcas without Marlene.
After a while he pulled away from me, sniffling.
"Thanks. But I think, it's over." he said through his sobs.
"Maybe he'll show up again." I encouraged him. He looked at me briefly and hope flickered in his eyes. Hope was such a wonderful thing. It was hardly eradicable and something Voldemort couldn't take from all of us.

"Yeah, maybe just today something came up.", he said in a low voice. I nodded and took his hand.
"You can always talk to me about Regulus!" I said softly. He nodded with a little smile.
"Let's go. It's freezing," he stated and we quickly hurried to the fireplace and food in the Burrow. But before we could enter, Gideon met us with a worried look.
"What's happening? And don't say Fabian is overworked. I've been able to keep him completely out of the affairs of the Order for the past few weeks," he said in a low voice, wrapping my cloak around my trembling shoulders. I looked at him gratefully. He always knew exactly what I needed. But his eyes wandered to Fabian's pale face.
"Fabian, please! We have always trusted each other! I know you both well enough to notice that you're hiding something from me. And I don't have a problem with that either. But I think it's too big for your shoulders now, Fabian. So please tell me!" His gaze was worried and demanding. I knew that was exactly what was raging inside him.
Fabian nodded uneasily.
"I'd better leave you guys alone and-" I began. My hand was already on the door handle when Fabian held me back.
"No, stay! You know already everything. ", said Fabian and grabbed my hand. I felt he needed my presence to tell his brother the truth. But I sensed his doubts. I nodded confidently at him and smiled. I knew Gideon well enough to know that he would never stand in the way of his love.
When Fabian finished his story about Regulus, Gideon was calm.
"You're sure he didn't use you?" Gideon asked quietly.
"For what? He never questioned me in any way or wanted to get any information." Fabian hissed hostilely. He felt his competence questioned.
"There are means of getting information without the person realizing it. Vitaserum, Legilimency and-"
"No, he would never do that. I trust him. Completely." Gideon searched Fabian's eyes, but Fabian didn't even blink. His expression showed strength and he looked at his older brother defiantly. I felt that he would fight for his great love.
"Then he is in great danger. We should see Dumbledore and-" Gideon began, but Fabian quickly cut him off and shook his head vigorously. His curls flew wildly.
"No, Regulus wouldn't want that. He begged me not to get involved or to inform anyone if he was to leave," he replied.
"Understand. I guess we'll just have to wait and hope for the best for him then. And when you see him, you're going to tell him I want to meet him, all right?"
"For what? To question him?" Fabian asked in a bitter voice and looked at Gideon in disbelief.
"No, I want to get to know the man my brother loves so much," Gideon replied with a smirk.
Fabian smiled and both hugged brotherly.
But Fabian's reaction over the next few days showed us that Regulus hadn't called again.

The sad certainty came to Sirius a day after New Year's Eve in the form of an owl.
In it, his mother informed him that Regulus had disappeared without a trace and that their father, Orion, had died trying to find him.
"I'm sorry, Sirius," I said, my voice faltering. Sirius shook himself.
"Oh, it doesn't have to be. My brother was a Death Eater, so it's no pity. He probably wanted to get out and his lord won't let that happen. Poor victim."
Fabian, who was also in the large room of the Order's hidden house, immediately left the room. He gave me a look that told me not to follow him. I swallowed.
"And your father?" I asked Sirius. I wanted to distract from Fabian's reaction.
"Black magic idiot. Serves him right that his favourite son was lost to Voldemort. Always pushed him there. The loss must have been too painful for him. He was never the kind of father one would wish for either, you know?" Sirius took a long pull on Firewhisky and threw his mother's letter into the fireplace, where after a brief burst of flames it crumbled to ash.
"Yes, Sirius' childhood was similar to yours," Lily stated sadly to me.
"Unloving and cold!" Sirius said. Our eyes meet. Everyone had scratches on their souls, didn't they? And everyone deals with it differently.
He grinned slightly and turned to James.
"Not everyone can have a loving family like James and Lily had." Sirius said with a smirk.
"You forget Petunia. She hates me so much that she didn't invite me to her wedding this week and she didn't attend my wedding either." Lily stated sadly.
"Well, what are friends for? James is like a brother to me." Sirius said, patting James on the shoulder happily. James beamed at him.
"Yes, and Catherine is like a sister to me.", said Lily luckily. I swallowed and hugged her. She smelled faintly of her violet perfume.
"And while we're at it: our family will grow in the summer," she said, running a hand lovingly over her stomach.
"No, you're not going to-" Sirius began with his jaw dropping.
"Yes, mate! A new Potter is on the way.", said James loud with a grin. Sirius yelped with delight and I hugged Lily tightly with joy.
A life for a life - that's how it is in times of war.
We toasted the new life in our midst: "May the child know peace and be safe!"
"Excuse me, I'll check on Fabian. He's been overworked a lot lately," I said after we were all happy about Lily's pregnancy.
I found Fabian in a small room upstairs. He had locked it, but I quickly gained entry with a counterspell. He was lying on the floor, banging his fists on the floorboards. I sent out a muffilato so we wouldn't be disturbed. I sat down next to him and gently stroked his back. We were silent. Because what words should help? How to overcome the loss of great love?
The next few weeks were difficult. Gideon and I tried our best to help Fabian. But we both knew that this loss was just too heavy. It would draw Fabian forever.