Chapter 19: Pork Soda
The air smelled artificially sweet. Her first thought was Ibuki's hair, fragrant with the fruity-smelling shampoo she liked, but the scent was stronger here, like syrup mixed with chemicals. Hanako cracked her eyes open and saw luminescent floating strawberries. She squeezed her eyes shut again.
What the fuck did I take?
It definitely felt like coming down from a bad trip. Her mouth was cotton-dry, her stomach hurt, and it took a conscious effort to inventory all of her body parts and make sure they were still attached.
Distressed voices filtered around her. A light thud made her open her eyes again. Chiaki was kneeling next to her.
"Yukimura, are you all right?"
She blinked rapidly, trying to orient herself. The floor and walls were all bright pink. It took her a moment to make out the shapes of a swing set and a slide—also pink. The only breaks in the nauseating amount of pink were the camera, monitor, and the others.
"We think that gas that came out on the train knocked us out," Chiaki said. "And then Monokuma brought us to wherever this is."
Gingerly, Hanako sat up. "So nothing for you to make me throw up, huh?"
Chiaki didn't respond to that, and she immediately felt bad for saying it.
"Welcome to Strawberry House!"
Hanako winced at the sound of Monokuma's voice. She propped her head in one hand and focused on breathing through her nausea as Monokuma waved a paper map around and rambled on about the layout of the building.
"Knowing the structure is all well and good, but why bring us here?" Nekomaru asked.
"Isn't it obvious?" Monokuma replied coyly. "This is the next motive: an escape game designed by yours truly. The rules are pretty simple. Kill someone, and the rest of you can leave. Provided you survive the trial, of course."
With a cackle, he disappeared.
Kill and escape. Hanako sighed and pressed the heels of her hands against her eyes. There had to be more to it than that. After the hell he'd put them through with the Despair Disease, she couldn't imagine he'd roll back with something as simple as an escape game.
"We should look around for an exit," Chiaki was saying to the others. "Even if we don't find one, at least we'll have a better sense of our surroundings."
"Perhaps we should go in pairs for everyone's safety," Sonia said.
"Owari, you're with me," Fuyuhiko said. "Sound good?"
"Yeah, whatever."
"Hey, now that's an interesting pairing," Kazuichi said, and Hanako could picture the middle finger Fuyuhiko flashed at him as he left. "So, uh. Where'd Sonia go?"
"She already left with Tanaka," Chiaki said.
Kazuichi's sneakers squeaked against the floor. Hanako heard them draw near and braced herself as he tapped her on the arm.
"Hey, Yukimura, you doing okay? Did you want to partner up?"
Blearily, she lifted her head. "Fine. Sure." She accepted his hand and let him pull her to her feet.
"I suppose you could call that an interesting pairing, too," Nagito said, a smile in his voice. "I normally would've expected you to pair up with Hinata. Unless you're avoiding him, Souda?"
"Wait, what?" Hajime asked, glancing between them two of them.
Nagito shrugged, his expression carefully neutral. "Maybe Souda can't stop thinking about the possibility that Hinata is the traitor."
"Shut the fuck up, Komaeda," Hanako said, too exhausted to put any real hostility in her voice.
Kazuichi only shifted his weight as Hajime turned to him with an incredulous look. "Sorry, man. It's just that we don't really know anything about you. Not even your talent. And you were the one who suggested we take the train."
"That wasn't…" Hajime began, but the indignation was gone from his voice, replaced by hurt.
Hanako was about to tell Kazuichi to shut up too, but her jaw locked in place.
We don't really know anything about you.
She knew Hajime had been the one to sit with her when she couldn't sleep. He'd brought her headphones just because he'd thought she would like them. He'd carried her to the hospital when she'd been too drunk and suicidal to move herself.
But she would never be certain that any of that kindness had been real.
"Let's just go." She grabbed the front of Kazuichi's jumpsuit and dragged him away from the remainder of the group.
"Okay, okay." Kazuichi pulled himself from her grip and brushed himself off. He fell into step beside her as they descended the stairs. "It's not like I don't want to trust him, you know? It's just hard, after everything. You get it, right? After what happened with Tsumiki?"
The words slid under her skin like a razor blade. She stopped short, staring at the vibrant pink of the wall in front of her. It was just one shade off from looking like exposed muscle.
"How do I know I can trust you?" she asked quietly.
Kazuichi let out a noise that sounded like an aborted attempt at a laugh. "Me? Seriously? I-I'm not like that."
She shifted her gaze to him, and whatever he saw on her face made the remaining humor in his expression vanish. "But there's no way I can know for sure, right?"
"I guess not. But, you know." He tore his gaze away. "Let's just hurry up and check out the rest of the building, okay?"
He jogged down the stairs ahead of her, and she followed with barely-steady footsteps. The bright walls weren't helping her headache. Her stomach hurt.
They wandered through the dorm area on the second floor. Sonia and Gundham were bent over a rotary phone in the lounge, heads close together, and Kazuichi let out a small, unhappy noise at the sight.
"Sonia wouldn't go for a guy like that, right?" he muttered once they were out of earshot.
The longing in his voice put a pit in her stomach. He'd been the one to encourage her to start something with Ibuki in the first place, out of some misguided notion that any of them could find romance in the middle of a killing game.
"I don't know what she even sees in Tanaka. The guy's a total weirdo." Kazuichi nudged her with his elbow, and she realized he wanted a response.
"Souda, is that really what you're worried about right now?" She hated how hollow her voice sounded.
"I'm just trying to lighten the mood, I guess. I didn't mean to say anything weird."
She sighed and made for the stairs heading to the first floor.
"Hey, Yukimura?"
She stopped and turned her head just enough to let him know she was listening.
"I'm really sorry about Mioda."
Tears pricked her eyes. The gut-punch feeling was back, hollowing out her torso and replacing it with cold air.
"Let's just go," she whispered, and led the way downstairs.
The first floor was one large room that was somehow pinker than the previous two. Strawberries were plastered across the bathrooms, the giant strawberry sculpture, the arching doorway labeled 'Strawberry Hall.' Hanako was glad to rest her eyes on the doorway next to the stairs, just because it wasn't covered in fucking strawberries.
The double doors were painted with garish shapes resembling a clown, and above it was a sign scrawled in messy kanji.
Final Dead Room.
Before she knew it, her hand was on the doorknob, her heart pounding with a mix of dread and excitement.
"Hey, what are you doing?" Kazuichi flattened one hand against the door before she could open it. "It might be dangerous in there."
It fucking better be. She fixed him with a challenging look. "We're supposed to look around, right?"
"Shark Boy is right, for once." Monokuma's voice sounded behind them, and Hanako suppressed a groan. "I'd at least like to get through my introduction speech before any of you go charging in."
Kazuichi blinked. "What did you just call me?"
Monokuma ignored him and clapped his hands. "Gather round, my dear students. It is time for me to explain the deadly, the dangerous, the dastardly Final Dead Room!"
Hanako glared at the clown face on the door as the others drifted into a loose cluster around Monokuma.
"The Final Dead Room is a dangerous little matryoshka doll, an escape room within an escape room," he said. "Inside, you can play the Life-Threatening Game, and if you happen to win, you'll gain access to the Octagon, where you'll find the Ultimate Weapon."
Most of those words sounded like gibberish from a bad television show, but one phrase had caught her interest.
"What do you mean by 'Life-Threatening Game?'" Hanako asked.
Monokuma grinned. "That's for me to know, and you to find out."
"What kind of game gives out a weapon as a prize?" Nekomaru said. "That's a game barely worth playing."
Hanako didn't give a shit about the weapon, either. She just needed to find out what was in that room, and whether a death from the game would still count as a murder.
"Hey." Kazuichi nudged her arm, a nervous tremor in his voice. "You're not actually thinking of going in there, right? It's probably just another one of Monokuma's tricks to get us to try and kill one another."
She didn't move her gaze from the door. "It's fine if you don't trust me either."
"That's not what I meant." He nudged her arm again. She thought about hitting him. "Look, the others are getting in the elevator over there. Maybe it'll take us to a way out."
Instead of smacking Kazuichi, or telling him that there was no way in hell their escape would be as simple as an elevator, she let her feet drag her over to the sliding metal door. She took the spot near the back and fixed her gaze on the multicolored puzzle pattern on the floor.
She'd never been afraid of small spaces, but standing here made her skin crawl. Every time she stood in an elevator here, there was one less person. Somehow it made the space feel smaller.
The elevator ride was so smooth it barely felt like it was moving, but when the doors opened again, she was almost relieved to see an absence of pink.
Instead, the room beyond was green. And splattered with grapes.
"Fucking great," she muttered.
Monokuma appeared and waved a paper map at them. "Welcome to Grape House! It's pretty much the same as Strawberry House, except there's no Final Dead Room. Instead, on the third floor, there's something even better—the Monokuma Archive! It's a modest little collection of all the accomplishments of yours truly. Now, before I leave you all to explore, are there any questions?"
Akane raised her hand. "I didn't see any food in Strawberry House. Is it all in Grape House?"
"Food?" Monokuma put a paw to his chin. "Is that really necessary?"
Her jaw dropped. "Whaddaya mean? Of course it's necessary!"
"In that case, you'd all better hurry up. After all, what's the fun of an escape game without a time limit?"
"What the hell does that mean?" Fuyuhiko asked.
"It means you'd better kill someone before you starve to death." Monokuma let out a cackle and disappeared.
Akane blinked, looking utterly shellshocked. "He's not gonna give us food? Then what are we gonna eat?"
And there it is. Hanako leaned against the wall next to the elevator. Their new motive was pure desperation. She'd heard stories of plane crashes and shipwrecks, the lines people would cross just because they were hungry. One of them was going to break eventually.
"Let's just look around for now," Chiaki said. "The same pairings as last time should be okay, right?"
"Actually, I was thinking about pairing up with Sonia this time." Kazuichi looked around.
"She already left with Tanaka," Fuyuhiko said. "Yukimura, you're with me this time, alright?"
There was something in his voice that didn't really make it sound like a question. Hanako didn't have the energy to protest, and she wanted even less to listen to Kazuichi complain some more.
"Sure. Whatever." She shrugged and let him lead the way towards the stairs.
Fuyuhiko was quiet, hands tucked in his pockets as he walked down the second floor hallway. He stopped at one of the bedroom doors and opened it.
"Let's check out one of these, yeah?"
The room was minimally furnished with a bed, a monitor, and a changing screen. Everything was green, but the tones were mercifully muted, nothing like the near-neon outside.
While Fuyuhiko closed the door, Hanako sat on the bed, hands resting on her knees. "Go ahead."
"What?"
"You have some kind of speech prepared, right? Let's get it over with."
Fuyuhiko sighed and leaned back against the door, arms crossed. "You tried to kill yourself last night."
Hanako surprised herself with a bitter laugh. "It was really that obvious, huh?"
"I didn't realize until you didn't show up for breakfast this morning." The crease between his brows deepened. "I should have guessed, after everything you went through, but I thought you just wanted to be alone. If I'd thought it through—"
"Don't put this on yourself," she said. "You don't get to do that. Last night was my fucking business, and it would have been better for everyone if Hinata and Nanami hadn't stopped me."
"You stopped me, didn't you?" he said quietly.
She bit her lip, guilt resting bitter in the back of her throat. "That…That was different. Everyone was standing there—"
"And what were Hinata and Nanami supposed to do? Fuckin' leave you there?"
"Maybe." Her grip tightened on the bedsheets. "Don't you wish people had respected your choice?"
"I never had one. Peko wanted me to live. It's the only thing I have left of her." His jaw trembled. "Don't you think Mioda—"
"She's not here!" Her voice rose to a shout. "It doesn't matter what Ibuki would have wanted, because she's dead!"
"Then you find something else to hang onto," he said, matching her volume. "Something else you can use to survive. At the very least, don't let that fucking bear see you go out like this. Don't let Monokuma win."
Her retort died in her throat. Mikan was gone, but she wasn't the only reason Ibuki was dead. Monokuma and whoever else was behind this was still out there. And she was tired of letting him hold her friends hostage against her.
"You get what I'm saying?" Fuyuhiko asked, his voice quieter. "This isn't over yet."
"Maybe not." She stood up and tried to hide the way it made her head spin. "Let's go. We should check out the rest of the building."
"Yeah. Okay." He opened the door and led the way outside. "I'm already fuckin' sick of grapes."
They regrouped with the others in Grape Tower, a cylindrical room lit with so much green it was beginning to hurt Hanako's eyes.
"Now that we are all gathered, why don't all the pairs take a turn sharing what we have learned?" Sonia said, then smiled. "I believe the discovery Gundham and I have made will outclass you all."
"I think mine is more important, actually," Akane said, throwing up an arm to gain their attention. "There's seriously no food in here. I checked the bedrooms and the bathrooms, but there's nothing."
Kazuichi tugged at the brim of his beanie with a grimace. "I heard it's super painful to starve to death. It makes people go crazy."
"Then we'll have to find a way out of here before that happens," Chiaki said.
"Maybe we shouldn't," Hanako said.
Everyone turned to her. It was difficult to meet their eyes, but she forced herself to do it. They needed to hear her this time.
Gundham crossed his arms. "And what is it that we should not do?"
"I don't think we should try to get out. I think we should stay here and starve," she said, enunciating each word carefully.
"Why the hell would you say something like that?" Akane asked, her eyes wide.
"Listen to me. We have a chance to beat Monokuma at his own game." As she spoke, something fluttered in her chest. "He's been forcing us to kill each other for some sick fuck's entertainment. If we take that away from him, if we all die her together, on our terms, Monokuma loses."
Nagito tilted his head. "What a strange idea. Is that your hope, Yukimura? A mass suicide?"
"Komaeda, shut the fuck up."
"This isn't what I meant earlier," Fuyuhiko hissed. "Letting ourselves die isn't a win."
"Isn't it?" She realized her hands were shaking and tightened them into fists. "Monokuma's been toying with us. He's been killing us off one by one. And we haven't had a fucking whisper of an escape plan since we got here. Dying is the only way out of the game. How do you guys not see that?"
No one responded. Kazuichi looked like he was on the verge of backing away. Fuyuhiko was shaking his head. And Hajime…he was giving her a look that made her heart twist. Like she was already dead.
"You all think I'm crazy," she said hoarsely.
"I do not think we should consider such a drastic measure until all our other options have been exhausted," Sonia said, the tremor in her voice barely audible.
"The Dark Lady speaks the truth," Gundham said. "It would be an affront to nature itself to seek death so swiftly."
"He's not just gonna let us walk out of here," Hanako said. The ringing in her ears was loud enough to partially drown out her own voice. "We've been through this three fucking times already. We know how this goes."
The implication in her words was like a glass shattering, sharp and inevitable.
Which one of you is it going to be this time?
"If no one's going to say it, then I will," Hajime said, his voice hard. "It's out of the question. We're not all dying here."
"We're not all getting out, either," she spat, then turned on her heel and left the room.
The door had no hinges, so there was no satisfaction of slamming it behind her. The hallway outside the tower seemed infinitely long, like the barrel of a rifle, like an esophagus preparing to swallow her. Everything was green. The smell of fresh grapes stung her nostrils.
Her breaths were coming faster, sharper. She pushed open the door to the bathroom and everything inside was fucking green. She caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror above the sinks, the wild, panicked angles of her face, and shoved her way into one of the bathroom stalls. The toilet, thankfully, was its usual white porcelain. She climbed on top of the lid and buried her face in her arms.
Her sobs came out in short, sharp noises. She took the pen from her pocket and began filling in the stars outlined on her left arm, the strokes deep and deliberate.
She'd only finished two stars before the door to the bathroom swung open. She bit back an exasperated sigh.
"Yukimura?" Sonia's heels clicked against the floor. "Are you in here?"
Hanako shut her eyes. One minute. Just one fucking minute of peace.
"After what you said in Grape Tower, I am afraid you may be about to do something reckless." Her footsteps moved to the stall door, and it rattled under the pressure of her hand. "If you do not let me know you are alright, I will have no choice but to ask Nidai to break down the door."
"Oh my god, I'm just sitting here," she croaked. "I'm not, like, drowning myself in the toilet."
Sonia exhaled. "That is good to hear. Not to mention that would be quite an unpleasant death."
Hanako rested her cheek against her arm and said nothing.
"Souda seemed concerned that you were going back to the Final Dead Room," Sonia continued after a moment. "I would like to make an argument as to why you should avoid that place."
"Let me guess. Is it because I shouldn't give up on life or whatever?"
"I would like that to go without saying. I'm sure you know how devastated we would be if anything happened to you." Sonia's voice trembled a little, and Hanako shut her eyes again, glad she didn't have to hide the pain on her face. "Instead, I would like to remind you that Monokuma described the room as deadly. There is a chance that you would die from whatever device is inside, and that would not qualify as a murder. The rest of us would remain trapped in the Funhouse."
Hanako mulled over her words. She hadn't been expecting something so cold from Sonia of all people. "So you're saying if I die, it should at least get the rest of you out."
"Absolutely not," she said sharply. "I would prefer you not die at all. I am only saying you would not be accomplishing anything worthwhile by entering the Final Dead Room."
"And what if I don't want to accomplish anything?" she whispered. "What if I'm just sick of surviving?"
Sonia was silent, for long enough that Hanako wondered if she was still there. When she spoke, the effort it took to keep her voice steady was audible.
"I understand that a common feature among traumatic situations is a lack of control. I do not wish to cause you any more pain by taking away your choice in this matter. I would only ask that you delay your decision for one day."
Hanako lifted her eyes to the stall door, staring hard at it as if the surface would become transparent. "What's happening after one day?"
"I cannot say. But perhaps we will have found a way out."
Her shoulders dropped. "You're just stalling for time."
"You're very perceptive, Yukimura." She suppressed a noise that might have been a sniffle. "And the Final Dead Room will still be there tomorrow, yes?"
Hanako sighed and extended her stiff legs, resting her feet on the floor. She was so, so tired. Her stomach still hurt. And she was sick of listening to Sonia try not to cry.
When she opened the stall door, Sonia quickly wiped her eyes and straightened with a tentative smile. "Does this mean you've decided to wait?"
"For now."
"Then perhaps we can retire to the bedrooms. I'm sure we could all use some rest."
Hanako nodded for her to lead the way. As Sonia turned her back and pushed open the door, a memory pricked the side of her head.
Hey, do you think this is gonna keep happening? The two of us having weird, emotional moments in bathrooms?
Mikan's smile, her ever-present tears. Her kindness, plastered like paper mache over a poisonous malice.
She crossed her arms to keep them from shaking and kept her distance as she followed Sonia.
Akane was waiting for them outside the guest rooms, arms folded and one foot kicking like she was bouncing an invisible soccer ball.
"Yo. We saved the two Deluxe Rooms for you guys."
"The what?" Hanako asked.
"The guest rooms have varying levels of quality. The Deluxe Rooms have soundproofing and quality ventilation. There is also one Standard Room and two Crummy Rooms." Sonia turned to Akane. "Owari, are you sure you would not like to take one of the nicer rooms?"
She shrugged. "Nah. The Crummy Room's nice enough for me. 'Night, guys."
"Good night." Sonia waved as she disappeared down the hallway. "I hope you can get some rest, Yukimura. And thank you for humoring me today."
"Sure." Hanako didn't meet her eyes. "See you."
She entered the room across from Sonia's at the back of the hall. It was, true to its name, deluxe—even more extravagant than her cottage on the first island. The walls were mercifully blue, and the space was furnished with a four-poster bed, a vanity, a chandelier, a chaise lounge, and a small fireplace.
Hanako crawled into bed and curled up on her side with a pillow pressed against her stomach. She wondered if it was hunger pangs, or if she'd actually done some real damage last night.
Sonia had said she wanted her to have a choice. Whether she meant those words was up for debate, and she doubted the others would agree with the sentiment. It didn't matter, anyway. They were all sleeping now, and it wouldn't take much effort to take the elevator and return to the Final Dead Room.
Could it be that a part of you still wants to live?
"God, shut up," she muttered, rolling onto her other side. She should have killed herself when things were easier, before they all got trapped in this godforsaken Funhouse. Maybe it would have prevented the others from being brought here. Or maybe it would have happened anyway, and they'd have to sacrifice someone else to escape.
I'm glad Ibuki's not here for this, she thought, and tears pricked her eyes. At least she didn't have to suffer with the rest of them. She didn't have to see all the ugly things the murders and Mikan's betrayal had brought to the surface.
Hanako sat up and began filling in the rest of the stars on her arm with her pen. She needed something to mute the buzzing beneath her skin. She wished, for what she was sure would not be the last time, that she'd brought her mp3 player with her. She would have been happy with the sound of the ocean, which she realized now she'd taken for granted. It was too fucking quiet in here.
She sighed. Soundproofing. Right.
With a grunt, she rolled off the bed and left the room. A low electrical hum filled her ears as soon as she opened the door. The doors near the entrance were of noticeably lesser quality, so she assumed those were the Crummy Rooms. Akane was in the one across from the lounge, and it made sense that Chiaki would take the better of the remaining two options. Hopefully no one would freak out about her changing rooms.
Hanako pushed open the door to the empty room and froze.
Hajime sat up in the bed, probably having heard the squeak of the door hinges. He looked at her and raised his eyebrows. "Yukimura?"
"Shit. Sorry. I didn't know anyone was in this room. For some reason I thought we were doing a boy-girl split."
He pushed the blanket off his legs and swung them over the side of the bed. "That was the original plan, but there's six guys and only five bedrooms in Strawberry House. Sonia offered me one of the rooms here."
"Yeah, that makes sense. Sorry." She closed the door with a huff. So much for that plan.
She didn't make it far down the hall before the door opened again and Hajime poked his head out.
"Hey, what were you doing here anyway? Did you need something?"
She sighed and turned around. "Can I switch rooms with you?"
His brow furrowed. "Why? Don't you have a Deluxe Room?"
She didn't have the energy to come up with a witty response. "It's way too quiet in there and I think I might actually go insane."
"Okay, then. We can switch rooms." Hajime stepped aside to let her enter the room, and she squeezed past him through the doorway. The furniture inside was cheap-looking and the bedsheets were littered with patchwork, but she didn't give a shit. She turned around to see Hajime still watching her.
"What?"
"Look, I really think we should talk about this."
Her answering smile felt wrong on her face, like she'd forgotten how to do it correctly. "Do you know how many people have tried to talk to me today?"
"Maybe it's because we all care about you." He seemed to realize that he'd raised his voice and shut the door behind him.
"Hinata, we're not doing this right now." Her nails bit into her palms. "I don't want to be around you, okay?"
Hurt flashed on his face. "Why?"
"Because—" Her voice cracked. She swallowed and tried again. "I'm fucking scared, okay?"
"Do you think I'm the traitor?"
"I don't know." She wrapped her arms around herself. "I don't want to think that. And if you turn out to be the traitor anyway, then fuck me, right? And if you're not, and I was right to trust you, and then you die anyway, then I'm still fucked."
"I'm not gonna die."
"Do you really think you can promise me something like that?"
"I…" His expression fell. "No."
"This isn't like the trials. You can't just talk your way to the right answer. Look, I promised Sonia I would wait a day before…before I decided to do anything. We might as well get some sleep in the meantime. I'll still be here in the morning, alright?"
Hajime held her gaze. "Promise me."
She suddenly felt defensive, and she hated it. "Fine. I promise. Pinky swear, whatever."
"Okay. I'll hold you to that." He hesitated, then left the room.
It was an empty threat, but he'd made it anyway. That, and the empty promise that she wouldn't lose him. She wanted to believe him so, so badly, the way she'd made the leap to trust him all those times before.
Fighting back tears, she lay down on the bed. The pillow smelled a little like sweat, combined with an earthy scent that she couldn't place.
She closed her eyes and waited for exhaustion to finally take her.
I forget if this was ever established in canon but I feel like it would be extra fucked up if the Funhouse was fruit scented. Anyway, this chapter is titled after Pork Soda by Glass Animals, one of my favorite songs from my all-time favorite album. And appropriately fruit themed hehe
