Chapter 3: I have a cunning plan
"I would really like you to come over for tea so you could tell me everything in person, Hermione."
"Mum, I already told you I've had an exhausting week with work and setting up the apartment."
"How on earth are you still unpacking, what use is there to magic?"
Busted.
"I'm just getting used to everything, including being close to you. I mean - in Britain."
Uh-oh.
"Oh. I can understand that."
Nice save, Hermione.
"So, how is the new job?"
"It's exhilarating, and the people are very nice to me."
"You're editor-in-chief, they ought to be nice to you."
And there she is.
"Have you been socializing, dear?"
"As a matter of fact, I have. Two old school friends work there too, we went out for drinks a few times… and there is this very nice colleague who -"
"Oh, do tell! What does he do? What's his status? Do you like him?"
I meant Ron, but whatever.
"Uhm ok, well… He's a lawyer -"
"Oh dear, I like the sound of that!"
Of course you do.
"Tell you what, mum - I'll come over for tea on Sunday and I'll give you the whole story. What do you say?"
"Lovely darling, looking forward to it."
"Alright, talk to you later, I need to get ready for work. Bye!"
"Bye, darling."
Locking her phone, Hermione dropped back on the bed and huffed. The short conversation with her mother almost made her want to go back to sleep. Sunday was six days away, but she should already start mentally preparing for tea with Mum. There will be million questions and most will be about Cormac.
A girl like you needs a proper husband - one that is on her level or better. Don't settle Hermione, or you'll end up like me. And hurry up, you won't be young forever.
Her mother's voice rang in her head - she had heard that speech countless times and it was always somewhere in the background of every conversation they had. The whole perfect husband thing intensified when they discovered that she was a witch and went completely overboard when dad filed for divorce.
She let out a loud sigh and got up. The curtains were still drawn, with another glum September morning peeking in at the corners of her bedroom window. Days like these just called for curling up with a good book under a cozy blanket.
Alas, no rest for this witch.
Today it was a magenta blouse with dark brown tweed trousers. She pulled up her hair in a sleek ponytail and once she was satisfied with the reflection in the mirror, Hermione put on her raincoat, and flicked her lock shut.
Most days she apparated from her flat, but today she needed to clear her head a bit before work, and walking would do the trick. There was a stealthy apparition point a few blocks ahead widely used by young witches and wizards who lived in that part of London, so she began walking that way.
Two blocks later, her eyes caught a tall flash of red and she quickened her step.
Speaking of standing out from a crowd.
"Ron! Hey, Ron!"
The redhead stopped and turned around, making several people walking behind him almost collide. He was sensible enough to step towards the shops so as not to disrupt the stream of people hurrying to work.
"Hermione?" The corners of his lips curved up when their eyes met and then he took a large bite out of his sandwich as he waited for her to reach him.
"Hi," she breathed, finally coming to stand beside him,"How do I always manage to catch you around food?"
"You must have impeccable timing. Maybe I should start packing for two?" He joked, "You headed for the Sneaky Nook?"
"Excuse me?"
"The apparition point, three blocks from here?" He lowered his head and whispered, a lock of his ginger hair brushing her cheek.
His hair actually smells nice.
"Oh! Uhm, yes," She muttered, taking a step back.
"Great! Let's go. Want some?" He turned the sandwich in hand, motioning at the half he hadn't touched yet.
"No, thank you…?" Hermione replied with a confused look, walking beside him, already feeling the strain of keeping pace.
"Have you had breakfast?"
What kind of a question is that?!
"I only have coffee in the morning."
Ron tutted disapprovingly as he broke off half of the sandwich, wrapping it in one of the napkins he was holding.
"Ron, I really don't -"
Before she could articulate a made-up reason why she really skipped breakfast, Hermione was hurrying next to Ron with half of his sandwich.
"It's ham and cheese with honey mustard," he looked at Hermione from the corner of his eye, silently egging her on.
"Fine," she grumbled, taking a tiny bite.
Oh, goodness. This is delicious.
"Not bad."
Ron wiped his mouth, looking quite pleased with himself, "So, I assume you live in the area since you know about the Sneaky Nook?"
Hello, opportunity.
"I had no idea it was called that, but yes, Padma told me about it," Hermione baited.
The hell?! Really?! Of all people?! Act casual.
"She, uhm, seems like a good friend," Ron chucked his wrapper in a bin, hoping Hermione would change the subject.
"She is. Padma is really nice. Don't you think she's nice?" Hermione's voice went up a notch while she casually brushed the napkin over one corner of her mouth.
Is she serious? Ok. Keep it together, she is just making conversation… I think.
Reply with a smooth 'yes' and that's it.
…
"WhyWOuldyouthiNKIdont?!"
…
Somebody please murder me.
Hermione's eyebrows shot up and she chuckled: "Sorry, I didn't get that."
"Nevermind."
Note to self - facepalm hard at a later time.
Hermione eyed him suspiciously before going in for the kill.
"I couldn't help but notice…"
Fuck my life.
"...that you might fancy Padma."
Run! Apparate on the spot! Screw the statute of secrecy!
"It's that obvious, huh?"
Did I just confess?
Hermione took another bite. Chewing slowly, she gave him a knowing smile and Ron ran his hand through his hair.
"Does she know?" He asked timidly, shoving his sweaty hands deep into his jeans pockets.
"As far as I can tell - no."
"Ok, let's keep it that way."
When she looked up at him, Hermione felt a pang of guilt for making him uneasy. On second thought, maybe she shouldn't have pressed a co-worker she knew just over a week on such a personal topic, but everything was just so easy around him.
They walked in silence for a few minutes and Hermione finished her sandwich as they turned from the busy street into an alley to their left.
"Listen, Ron, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable -"
"It's fine," Ron cut in, "just… please don't tell her," he was looking straight ahead, scanning the alley for unwanted onlookers.
"Hey," she pulled his sleeve and Ron looked down. Only then did it strike her what an incredible shade of blue his eyes were, "I, uhm, I would never do such a thing."
"Thanks," he said simply, looking up again, "We're here."
The last shop in the narrow alley was all boarded up, its entrance indented just enough to successfully hide one person in the middle of a bustling street. There were no windows facing it and it truly was a sneaky nook for all intents and purposes.
"Witches first," Ron said dryly, standing next to the entrance, avoiding eye contact.
Bugger. Now he's cross with me.
Hermione opened her mouth to say something, but then decided against it at the last moment, so she just sighed and pulled out her wand. With a muffled pop she found herself in the Prophet's apparition circle on the first floor. Five minutes later there was still no sign of Ron and Hermione walked up the stairs alone, feeling utterly irritated.
Where the hell is he?
Hermione peered over ludicrous hats and balding heads in search of a particular scruffy shade of red, but all she could see was the equally messy mop of black hair hunched over his desk. The chair opposite him remained unoccupied.
Do I ask Harry? No. Too conspicuous.
Looking down at her desk, Hermione reviewed the same article about the 13 ways to boil Bogbean and caught herself reading the same sentence thrice.
This is ridiculous.
The clock announced noon and suddenly he appeared by the watercooler. Several pieces of parchment as well as some photos flew off Hermione's desk as she whisked around it and marched towards the kitchenette.
"G'day, Granger!"
"Yes, yes, hello," Hermione replied dismissively.
An old witch leaned over her desk, blowing the steam from her cup.
"I think Ron might be in trouble, lads."
"Isn't he most of the time, Philly dear?" Another witch replied from the other side, lurking behind the large pink leaves of her humming desk plant.
Hermione ignored all of them as she fixed her ponytail and approached Ron's unsuspecting backside crouching in front of the fridge.
She cleared her throat and Ron jumped up, spilling the content of his takeout box.
"Holy shi-" he turned around and faced her, "-take mushrooms," he finished, becoming aware of the blatant stares in the background.
"Are you angry with me?" Hermione asked, crossing her arms.
Ron leaned against the fridge and raised a brow at her, then stabbed his food with a fork, turning it dramatically before he shoved a large bite of noodles into his mouth.
"Seriously?"
"Nice to see you too," Ron replied with a smile after he swallowed, "And no. Why would you think that?"
"Were you by any chance avoiding me?"
Ron chuckled and Hermione huffed in annoyance.
"I was actually working, chief," he said nonchalantly, looking over her shoulder, "Move along, Dupont."
Hermione didn't even bother turning around.
"Well, alright. I actually need to talk to you. I -"
"Heya, Harry," Ron smirked.
For the love of Merlin.
"Ron, Hermione," Harry nodded in greeting, a curious twinkle in his eyes as he took the takeout box from Ron.
"So, uhm, how are things?" Harry asked, stirring the food with Ron's fork.
"Good," they chanted in unison and Ron suppressed a grin.
This is hysterical.
"Ok, imma, uhm, eat this at my desk. See ya later, mate."
Ron waited for Harry to move out of earshot, then walked to the watercooler, Hermione close behind him. Resting his arms on top of the bottle he looked at Hermione's annoyed face.
"So, what did you want to talk about?"
"Well," she began in a very bossy voice, "I have a proposal of sorts."
Should I be scared?
"Oook, what kind of proposal?"
"It seems to me that you are having trouble approaching Padma -"
"I don't have -"
"Will you let me finish?" She tapped her foot impatiently and Ron nodded, barely containing an eyeroll.
"Anyway, since you told me your secret…"
More like you fished it out of me, but sure, do continue.
"...I'll tell you something about me and maybe we could help each other."
She straightened her blouse and he tilted his head.
"Alright, I'll bite."
Hermione huffed and crossed her arms again, "I am weird around men."
"You're not weird around me."
Oh wow, she actually rolled her eyes at me.
"Around men that I find, you know… interesting."
"That's cold, Granger. Shot through the heart…" Ron exclaimed in a sing-song voice and clutched his chest.
"Was that Bon Jovi?"
"Of course it was Bon Jovi."
"Anyway, I would like to know more about your friend and I could help you with Padma in return," She continued in a very business-like manner.
Ron looked at her unblinking, trying to figure out if he had heard her correctly.
"You want my help with a bloke?!"
"No! We help each other! We're obviously both a bit rusty. We exchange information so we can approach the people we fancy easier."
"Can I be blunt? Ok, Imma be blunt - you just moved here and -"
"Listen," she cut in, "My biological clock is ticking, alright? Are you in or out?"
"Ok, fine." Ron raised his hands in mock surrender.
Mental, this one.
"Great!" Hermione sighed in relief, "Let's exchange cell numbers."
And so they did.
Ron walked towards his desk dazed and confused, almost tripping over the infamous orange bucket and finally dropped into his chair, frowning.
"What the hell was that all about?" Harry laughed and Ron knew he had been watching them.
"Honestly mate, even if I told you - you wouldn't believe me."
Nighttime seeped into Ron's one-bedroom apartment and he settled into his favorite chair with snacks in one hand, and the remote in the other.
As he flicked through the channels, a familiar film came into view and he smiled, glancing at his phone.
"Ah, what the hell."
Hey, Hermione - in case you're interested, there is a true classic showing on channel 5. Cinematic gold.
He set his phone back down, but the response blinked back almost immediately.
You call a film named "Pucked" cinematic gold?
Ha! Made you change the channel! :)
I was flicking through anyway.
Heeey, our friend Bon Jovi stars in it! At least give it a try!
Hm. Maybe, if nothing better is on. Good night, Ron.
Good night and enjoy Bon Jovi!
