A little Christmas present for Haemophilus Leona :)


Aro: Happy Christmas, brother!

Caius: (scowls and accepts wrapped box) Didn't I specifically demand that you never do this again?

Aro: Ah, but you will like this one, I promise. Open it!

Caius: A... toenail. I'm speechless.

Aro: But not any toenail—the claw of a werewolf!

Caius: I can see that. I already have eight hundred of these.

Aro: No, no! This is a shapeshifting werewolf claw, if you take my meaning.

Caius: Oh! Well. It will make a fine addition to my collection, then. Though it looks exactly like the others...

Aro: Caius, you are infuriatingly slow sometimes. Don't you realize what this means? We are safe from Alice's prying gift now!

Caius: Oh. Oh. *decides to annihilate the Cullens tomorrow*

Aro: One moment, I have a text... Oh, it's my dear friend Carlisle! He says... "Nice try." I wonder what that means?

Caius: It means your idiotic scheming has once again come to nothing. Where did you buy this thing, eBay?

Aro: Maybe... but the seller promised it was a genuine shifter-wolf toenail, freshly clipped!

Caius: (grabs package) (snorts) This is postmarked from Siberia. I told you it was from a Child of the Moon.

Aro: Hm... well... this is embarrassing. My apologies.

Caius: It's not a total loss. It looks like I'm going to Siberia for a little fun on the next full moon.

Aro: Ah! That's plenty of time for your birthday present to arrive, then.

Caius: Just please tell me you didn't get it on eBay too. Or something equally stupid, like Silver Bullets R Us.

Aro: *bites lip*