Komorebi

Trigger warning: suicide (please take care)

AN: This chapter is mostly groundwork for the OOC for Hinata. It will be easier to understand why she does the things she does in the later chapters.


Kurenai was sold to Daija Mountain 9 years ago, Orochimaru had taken a liking to her rare crimson eyes. Kurenai had wondered if he would kill her first before taking her eyes or he would prefer to take them out while she was still alive. She had mentally steel herself for the unknown ahead as she ascended the mountain. However, it seemed that her initial speculations were superlous when she was given the job taking care of the young hostage of Daija Mountain. The other servants had given her pitying looks when this assignment was handed out and through hushed whispers Kurenai learned the details of her young charge's attempted sucide. Using a memento that was given to her by the Hyuuga Clan, she had traded it for a dull kunai which she had spent days sharpening in secret. On the day of her attempt, Hinata had hidden herself in one of the storage rooms and slit her carotid artery. The young charge would have been successful if the blade had been just a tad bit sharper or if she had used a bit more pressure. The young hostage's disappearance was only noticed when someone had stepped into the crimson liquid that had leaked out from beneath the door crack. It was safe to say that the previous person who was said to be in charge of the young hostage had faced a punishment worse than death.

The first time that Kurenai had seen her young charge, Hinata's neck was wrapped in bandages and her pallor made her look sickly yet delicate. Her chin length dark hair seemed to give off a dull azure glow in the sunlight, making her face look strangely ethereal. Hinata had looked up, her pale eyes meeting Kurenai's crimson ones, the little girl's lips had parted in astonishment before commenting on how pretty Kurenai's eyes were. It was an instructable feeling to have her crimson eyes admired so openly, especially when the common reaction would be of shudder of disgust, the color of her eyes resembled fresh blood.

During the recovery period, her young charge seemed to be a docile and obedient child, it was this temperament that had lulled Kurenai into a false sense of security. Kurenai hadn't noticed the subtle changes in her young charge till it was too late. After the incident, Orochimaru would routinely ask Hinata to come to see him, Kurenai had been curious as to what Orochimaru would want to discuss with a ten year old child but Hinata always returned unharmed and unperturbed by these meetings. Kurenai had once asked Hinata about these meetings but Hinata only shrugged her shoulders and said it would be easier to show Kurenai one day than to explain. Later on, Kurenai would often think back to this conversation, she would wonder if she had forced Hinata to show her what Orochimaru was teaching her, would she have been to save a piece of the little girl who had looked at her eyes so admiringly?

It was the spring after Hinata's 13th birthday, when all Kurenai's sentiments came crashing down when she witnessed Hinata encouraging an unsuspecting bird to eat something off her palm, Kurenai had stopped to watch because she had admired the serene look on Hinata's face. Up to this point, Kurenai had been proud of her young charge because it seemed that Hinata retained her gentle and kind nature despite the situation that she was put in. The bird that Hinata fed came to willingly rest on her hand and even allowed Hinata to rub its soft underside, Kurenai had smiled at the sight, thinking that animals were the best judge of character.

It was then when the creature that ate off Hinata's hand had seized up and began withering in pain on the ground before eventually dying. Kurenai had watched in horror as the creature twisted in pain on the ground, it was only when Kurenai had looked up at her young charge, she didn't see a trace of fear on the young girl's face but a flash of dissapointment. If Hinata had seen Kurenai's horrified expression, the unwavering serene look remained on her as she casually replied, "Sensei said, death would be instant once ingested this poison so I mixed in white arrowroot to delay the effects but I don't think I added enough."

Kurenai had broken out in a cold sweat at her words, it was then Kurenai realized what Orochimaru had been teaching her young charge. In Kurenai's memories, that incident was a clear turning point on how she viewed her young charge. As the years passed, Kurenai had watched the little girl who genuinely admired her eyes grow up into the little mistress of the Daija Mountain.

Kurenai had seen the look of disdain on her little mistress's face while reading the scroll from the Hyuuga Clan. The scroll had been thrown into the fire as if it was another piece of spare tinder. This past winter, her little mistress's behavior had been odd, other than attending the annual winter hunt with other members' of Orochimaru's sect and disappearing off into the depth of the mountain for short bursts of time, Hinata hardly stepped out of her courtyard. During the winter months, when the stars still lingered in early mornings, Kurenai would awoke to a figure in a white fox fur cloak sitting in the courtyard, a living statue waiting for its movements to be restored at the first light of the day. It wasn't strange for Hinata to disappear all night but for her to stay still and wait for the sunrise was mystifying.

The night when snow began to fall, Kurenai had watched Hinata walk out into the courtyard in her cloak. It was truly a sight to behold, Hinata stood so still in the falling snow that her side profile resembled a majestic statue. Kurenai didn't know how Hinata stood out there but eventually she made her way back inside. Kurenai naturally moved to prepare hot tea and brought it to Hinata without being asked, perhaps, it was the comfort of the war of the hot tea on cold winter night that made Hinata reveal her thoughts, "I wonder if I'll ever get used to the feeling."

"What feeling?" asked Kurenai quietly, looking at the snow that had already melted into water drops on Hinata's hair.

"Being imprisoned."

Those words oddly made Kurenai's heart ache, finally understanding a fraction of her little mistress's odd behavior. A little taste of what her life will be reduced to once she leaves Daija Mountain. The loss of her freedom to roam the night as she pleased, all she was going to be allowed to do was to look at the world through the walls of the Hyuuga compound.

Another habit that Hinata had put a complete stop to was her indulgence in liquor. Kurenai learned that Hinata had an immunity to poisons and this immunity also extended to alcohol. Depending on the amount, alcohol percentage and speed that Hinata drank, the most she ever got was a bit tipsy. Yet, ever since Hinata discovered that temporary moment of tipsiness existed, Hinata started her journey in sampling and creating different brews. In these past few years, Kurenai had often been forced to participate in impromptu tasting of Hinata's creations. Slowly, Kurenai had also developed a decent tolerance towards alcohol but it would never be enough to keep up with Hinata. Kurenai had lost count of how many she had woken up with her face plastered against the cold stone table in the morning with a pounding hangover.

Kurenai knew her little mistress's indulgence in liquor depended heavily on her mood. Over the last few months with each passing day that Hinata abstained from alcohol, Kurenai's own mood grew more and more uneasy. It wasn't like her little mistress to be so static about a situation like this. Generally, Hinata would be decisive on her course of action in resolving such issues. Kurenai knew it was partially because Hinata's course of action would determine her own future therefore Kurenai tried to busy herself with creating liquor infused pastries hoping to lighten up her little mistress's mood. Kurenai's growing affliction came to an end in the late afternoon before the convoy was scheduled to arrive when Hinata finally gave Kurenai instructions regarding the upcoming departure.

"Say you need to come with me due to my 'illness'. Regardless of what happens during the journey, you are to treat me as if I was weak and useless and make it believable," said Hinata as she propped herself down at the stone table in her courtyard, helping herself to a fresh strawberry daifuku sitting on the table.

Kurenai's mouth felt dry as she heard these instructions, treating her little mistress as someone who was weak and useless was going against years of one's self preservation nature. The little mistress of Daija Mountain tended to be glutinous, lackadaisical, manipulative and even at times cruel but no one would describe her as weak and useless. Daija Mountain was a place where the weak and useless were surely swallowed and crushed in its jaws without a second thought. Kurenai often wondered if the Hyuuga Clan had a heart of steel to send a child of five to Daija Mountain for over a decade and half. Hinata must have seen the discomfort in Kurenai's eyes and added in a flat tone, "if you aren't able to, it may be best if you stayed here."

Kurenai shook her head at these words, she knew if she wasn't serving under Hinata, her usefulness would come to an end. Orochimaru would finally have a reason to take the eyes that he has been lusting after for years. Hinata knew this fact very well because Hinata had thwarted Orochimaru's numerous attempts over the years. Eventually, he relented and agreed that he would only take Kurenai's eyes when Hinata had no use for Kurenai. In some sense, his resignation gave Hinata even more power over her which Kurenai didn't know if it made her situation better or worse.

"I will do as you instruct," replied Kurenai firmly with her eyes downcasted, pondering how to fulfill her little mistress's request. Hinata had seemingly finished her instructions and proceeded to pour herself a cup of tea from the teapot on the table.

"Is this made from this year's first batch of tea leaves?" asked Hinata casually as she took a sip from the cup, Kurenai nodded and supplemented, "that's right, Mitsuki had delivered it a couple of days earlier and the leaves finished drying today."

"The fragrance from the first batch smells just like spring," murmured Hinata to herself before letting out a small contented sigh, over the years these little pleasures were things she began to take for granted. Hinata's fingers gripped the cup, reminding herself once she became the true mistress of Daija Mountain, no one could take these little pleasures from her ever again.

"Kurenai, bring me a brush and paper, I'll give you a list of what I like to bring to Konoha then, ask Kabuto to come to see me," instructed Hinata then a pause a for moment before adding, "Also, heat up the peach blossom sake for me."


It was Kou Hyuuga's first time visiting Daija Mountain, the journey from Konoha to Daija Mountain took an average of two weeks traveling by foot when one decided to take a shortcut through forest situated in between Daija Mountain and Konoha. The other way was to go around the forest which would be a considerably longer journey. Although Kou's group had arrived in record time to their destination, he knew the return trip would take much longer. It was made clear to him that the Hyuuga heiress was still recovering from her unexpected illness over the winter and would need to travel by horse and carriage. The group had acquired a carriage and horse in the previous town before arriving at the bottom of the mountain.

Kou took a deep breath trying to calm his nerves, this long awaited day has finally come, today would finally be the day that Hyuuaga heiress was free from Daija Mountain. It would be the first time after 15 years that the Hyuuga heiress would be able to return to her home and more importantly to her family. Kou held great admiration in his heart for the twenty year old as she had sacrificed 15 years of her life for the sake of the Hyuuga Clan. He had heard stories of Orochimaru's twisted exploys and shivered at the thought of what the young girl might have been put through, and he wasn't even her father. Her father, Hiashi Hyuuga, had been waiting for this day the moment he had sent her away.

The clan leader had wanted to come to retrieve his eldest daughter, the day after her twenty birthday but the elders of the clan had insisted they need to provide notice beforehand as they wouldn't know what condition she would be in. After a week of no reply had sent Hiashi in a spin but the elders had asked him to remain calm and not to show his impatience to Orochimaru. Kou wasn't sure exactly how many weeks that Hiashi had waited before he wrote a letter and sent it without the elders' prior approval.

Although the elders had scolded the clan leader for revealing his impatience and his eagerness over the retrieval of his daughter, the elders worried that the clan leader may have revealed a weakness that Orochimaru could potentially utilize against them. The elders had betted on Orochimaru either releasing the young heiress once she reached the age as defined by their alliance pact or asking the Hyuuga Clan to take her as his bride. The Hyuuga Clan's elders had considered a no reply, good thing, till Hiashi went and decided to send his own letter without consulting them. If Orochimaru wanted to keep the young heiress, the Hyuuga Clan would be one who benefited the most from this transaction.

However, it was not long before a reply actually had come stating that the Hyuuga heiress had fallen ill unexpectedly and would need to push back the return till spring next year in order to recover. Hiashi had silently wept when he read the reply, all he could think was that Hinata was almost free from Daija Mountain but if a serious illness were to really claim her life then Hinata would leave this world without ever returning home. Hiashi reluctantly agreed to push back the date of the return, he had personally picked Kou to lead this assignment and even asked Hokage sama to provide additional personnels for this retrieval mission. Hokage sama had ensured that the mission was to be a success.

After a couple of deep breaths, Kou was startled to notice that he was starting to feel a bit dizzy, he wondered if it was excess oxygen due to the thick forest that surrounded them. Daija Mountain was notorious for its thick forest and deep caves but in recent years, it has gotten attention for a temple that was located in the middle of the mountain. Due to more and more visitors coming to pray at the temple, there were stone stairs leading up the mountain. He stared up at the long winding stone case that led up to the mountain when he spotted two figures making their way down the stairs. A petite figure dressed in a light lavender top with an ankle length white wrap skirt tied at the waist and a long white kimono sleeve cover up to complete the look. The figure seemed to glow under the sunlight, her dark hair was put up in a loose bun, her face was covered by a sheer veil revealing only her signature Hyuuga eyes. The other figure was addressed in a red kimono sleeve shirt with dark pants, the woman had strangely bright crimson eyes that made Kou think of fresh blood. The crimson eyed woman was holding onto a suitcase with the Hyuuga Clan's symbol, it must have been the same suitcase that Hinata took with her when she was sent to Daija Mountain.

Kou felt his breath hitch in his throat at the sight of the Hyuuga heiress standing before him, the person before was no longer the shy little girl that he remembered that would hide behind her mother's skirts. He rushed up to them to introduce himself, he assumed that she would know him as someone from the Hyuuga Clan by the sight of his eyes. The woman in front of him bowed and in a small nervous voice, "T-Thank y-you for making the t-trip, Kou san." He looked curiously at the crimson eyed lady beside the Hyuuga heiress. The woman noticed his inquisitive look and forwardly introduced herself, "I'm Kurenai, I will help you to escort Hinata back as I'm the one who has been attending to her illness."

As if on cue, Hinata covered her mouth as cough racked her body and looked up at Kou with slightly watery apologetic eyes, "I-I apologize f-for the v-veil, but I-I didn't want to get anyone else s-sick." Kou did not expect her apology so he waved his hands in a nervous manner and commented on how Hinata was very considerate of other people and that she should leave on the veil as long as she wanted. Her head dipped again in thanks for his understanding, Kou had waved over the other shinobis who were a part of his team to her and Kurenai so he could introduce them.

Kou escorted Hinata and Kurenai to the carriage and watched Kurenai help Hinata into the carriage before shutting the door with a soft click. As the carriage pulled away from the mountain, Hinata couldn't control herself as her fingers moved to pull back the little curtain of the carraige's window to look back at the mountain slowly disappearing from her view. As the mountain gradually slipped out of her sight, the pain in her chest grew in proportion. When she could no longer see the mountain, she let her hand drop to her side and closed her eyes to let herself fully feel the pain in her chest.


AN: Thank you for all the review, follows and favs!