After Jack's car broke down, Gibbs agreed to drive her and Faith to and from work and school while it was being repaired. The arrangement was working out well until his team caught a case that required him to work late. He tried to convince Jack to take his truck and let him find another ride home, but she insisted that she could use the time to catch up on her own work. Before he could argue with her, she picked up the phone to call her elderly neighbor, a retired teacher who had previously babysat Faith when Jack had to work late. Within minutes, the woman had agreed to pick Faith up from her after school program and spend the evening with her.
NCIS NCIS NCIS
When Gibbs took Jack home, she invited him inside for a late dinner. As they approached the front door, the babysitter came outside to meet them. Jack smiled at her and apologized, "I'm sorry we're so late, Mrs. Evenson."
"It's not a problem," Mrs. Evenson replied with a kind smile. "Faith's an angel. She ate her dinner, did her homework, and went to bed on time, all without a single complaint."
"She didn't get into any trouble?"
"Depends on how you define trouble."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You'll see. Just remember that Faith loves you and wants you to be happy." Mrs. Evenson stepped between Jack and Gibbs and started to walk home. At the edge of the driveway, she turned back briefly to add, "And that I tried to talk her out of it."
"Talk her out of what?" Jack asked, but Mrs. Evenson was already walking away again.
Without stopping, Mrs. Evenson shouted, "You'll see!"
Jack and Gibbs watched Mrs. Evenson until she was safely home, then Jack opened the door and ushered Gibbs into her house. Nothing seemed out of place in either the entryway or the living room, so they proceeded to the kitchen where they learned exactly how Mrs. Evenson defined trouble.
Faith had made dinner for them and set the table. It was apparent that she hadn't allowed Mrs. Evenson to help given that the meal consisted of crudely made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and juice boxes. Between the two place settings, she had positioned the battery-operated candles Jack had bought to use in the jack-o-lanterns on Halloween.
Blushing, Jack backed out of the kitchen. "I need to check on Faith," she muttered. She brushed past Gibbs, but wasn't surprised when he followed her to Faith's bedroom and stood behind her in the doorway. As they watched Faith sleep, she murmured, "Even when she's trouble, I thank God that I got to keep her."
"Got to?"
"Yeah, got to. Look, Gibbs, I'm sorry about all this. I like you and I think you like me. I'm guessing Faith's picked up on that."
"She's mentioned it."
"Oh."
"Asked me to date you."
Groaning, Jack covered her face with her hands. "Please tell me you're joking."
"Can't. Asked me while we were fishing."
The sound of the bedsheets rustling as Faith shifted in her sleep reminded Jack that their discussion could potentially have an unwanted audience. In one swift move she dropped her hands from her face, pushed Gibbs into the hall, and pulled Faith's door closed. She led Gibbs back to the kitchen, then spun around and demanded to know, "What did you tell her?"
Gibbs lifted one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug. "Rule twelve. Never date a coworker."
"How'd she take it?"
"Asked me to think about it."
"And?" Jack pressed him. "Are we going to do something about it or do we let it fester until it becomes the elephant in the room that we never talk about?"
"Could do something. Might have to tell Faith about rule fifty-one and rule five. Sometimes you're wrong and you don't waste good."
Jack's gaze dropped to the floor and darted over to the table. Faith's attempt at matchmaking reminded Jack that it wasn't just her heart that would be in danger if she and Gibbs risked their friendship for the chance of something more. She realized that she would have to tell him about her past before they could move forward because if he found out later and couldn't accept it, everybody would be hurt worse than if they never tried at all. With her decision made, she said, "If we're going to do this, I think there's some things you need to know."
"Want to talk over dinner?"
"Might as well, but this isn't a conversation I can have by candlelight."
At Jack's insistence, they took their dinner to the living room and sat down on the couch. Gibbs instinctively knew that his reaction to whatever Jack said would likely determine whether they pursued a romantic relationship and possibly even the future of their friendship. He also recognized that Jack needed to be in control of the discussion, so he ate his sandwich and waited patiently for her to speak.
Jack picked at her dinner for a while before giving up the pretense of eating and setting her plate on the coffee table. After taking a deep, steadying breath, she began to talk. "When I was 19, a sophomore in college, some friends asked me out and we went to a party, and I drank too much. Way too much. I asked one of my friends to drive me home. Someone I was close with. Someone I trusted. And he raped me. After it happened, I blamed myself. For drinking too much. For putting myself in that situation. All the things that survivors put on themselves. Eventually, I left school over it. Six weeks later, I found out I was pregnant. Can you imagine?" Jack paused so Gibbs could answer and when he didn't, she asked, "Uh, aren't you gonna say anything?"
"What's his name?"
Sniffling, Jack wiped away the tears that had gathered in her eyes as she revealed her darkest secret. She refused to shed any more tears over someone and something she wished she could forget. Once she had dried her eyes, she stood up, grabbed her plate, and fled to the kitchen.
"Conversation's not over," Gibbs stated as he trailed after her.
"Oh, yes, it is."
"Will you slow down? It was just a question."
Jack stopped, not because she wanted to, but because she'd reached the kitchen sink and there was nowhere left to go. She dropped her sandwich into the trash and set her plate in the sink, giving Gibbs plenty of time to catch up to her before she turned to face him. "You're not getting an answer. Why do you think I never told you?"
"Because you thought I was gonna go kill the guy?"
"Because I couldn't stand the idea of you looking at me like I'm some sort of a victim. Like I'm a fragile teacup in need of saving. And that's exactly what you're doing."
"No, I'm not. It's a guy thing."
"Okay. This isn't about ancient history that can't be changed. This is about us trying to move forward." Sighing, Jack reached out to rest her hand on Gibbs' forearm. "I get that you're mad. And all I can say is welcome to the club. I've been a member for eight years. I can handle this on my own. I only told you because we want more than a friendship and I didn't want you to find out later and change your mind."
"Okay. Tell me the rest."
"The rest?"
"Your pregnancy. What you meant when you said you got to keep Faith. Why Faith calls herself your prize."
"Because she is."
"Tell me the rest, Jack, so I can tell you it doesn't change anything."
"It changed everything."
"Then, not now. Tell me."
"Right, the rest. Do you mind if we go back to the living room?"
"Anything you want, Jack."
They slowly made their way back to the living room. When they were settled on the couch, Jack didn't hesitate to resume her story. "When I was pregnant, I remember, I was so scared. I was terrified that, um, maybe I couldn't love Faith because of what happened. But then she was born, and I didn't want to let her go. But I was afraid I, um, couldn't be the mom that she deserved. I just felt so, um, I felt so damaged. I wanted to protect her. She was perfect and I loved her. I, I loved her so much, that I, I was going to send her away." As she spoke, Jack started to cry. This time she let herself quietly weep for herself and her precious daughter and the life they almost hadn't had a chance to share.
"Send her away?" Gibbs prodded gently.
"Adoption. I was so alone. There was no one to help me, no one I could talk to. If I told my friends, they'd have told, uh, him and I couldn't let that happen. I tried to talk to my parents, but they're, um, kinda old school. They thought that because he was a friend and I was drunk, it wasn't really rape, so I should just marry him. That was even worse. I couldn't let that man anywhere near me or my child. I was completely on my own with no idea how I was going to provide for my baby or keep her safe. I wasn't even sure I'd be able to love her and I didn't want to end up resenting her, so I found a nice couple to adopt her."
"What changed?"
"My grandmother figured out the truth. I don't know how she found out what had happened or how she found me, but she did. She showed up at the last minute and offered to help me. With the rape, the baby, everything. She gave me a real choice and said she would still love me no matter what I chose. I chose Faith. We moved in with my grandparents and they helped with everything. I spent that summer taking care of Faith and going to therapy. By the fall, I was ready to enroll in a new college. I worked my ass off to get my life back on track. The rest is history."
"Can't have been easy."
"I didn't want easy. I wanted possible."
"Does Faith know? Is that why she calls herself your prize?"
"Sorta. After I decided to keep her, I swore that she would never find out about the rape or that I almost gave her up for adoption. I didn't plan on ever telling anybody, but then Faith started to ask questions. She wanted to know why she didn't have a daddy and if he loved her and would he ever come back. Obviously, I couldn't tell her the truth, so I told her that her dad hurt me before she was born and that I'd almost lost her, but that it was okay because she was my prize for surviving. I know I'll have to tell her the truth someday, but right now, you're now the only person who knows, besides my grandparents."
"Dies with me."
"Along with the man who raped me. Sometimes I think that if he was dead, I'd feel a whole lot better."
"I doubt that."
"What are you talking about?"
Gibbs was tempted to respond with a vague platitude, but, as he looked at the tear tracks running down Jack's face and the fresh tears shimmering in her eyes, he knew that if he didn't want their relationship to end before it even started, he had to do better. Without a second thought, he said, "My wife, Shannon, she and my daughter, Kelly, they were, uh, killed together. And the man who did that, I hunted him down, and I shot him in the head. And I really thought that that would ease the ache in my heart. Nope. Not to this day. And you're the only one I've told."
For several seconds, Jack and Gibbs just stared at each other. Jack let out the breath she hadn't realized she was holding. The tension began to visibly ease from her shoulders, making Gibbs glad that he had opened up to her and encouraging him to continue. "After that, I tried to replace what I'd lost. I got married and divorced three times in five years."
"People aren't interchangeable, Gibbs. Faith and I can't be just another attempt to replace your family. It wouldn't be fair to any of us, including you."
"That's not what this is. I'm ready to move on."
"You're not just saying that because of what I told you, are you?"
"Didn't change anything. Told you it wouldn't."
"Then why now? Why me?"
"You're not a redhead."
"Come on," groused Jack. "This is important."
"Ah, geez, Jack, you already got me talkin' more in the last hour than I have in the last decade," Gibbs complained. With nothing more than a raised eyebrow, Jack signaled that she was unwilling to drop the subject. Resigned to giving her what she wanted, Gibbs explained, "All my ex-wives were redheads like Shannon. I didn't look past that. Didn't get to know them. Ended up with three too quick marriages followed by three not quick enough divorces. It's different with you. I'm different. I'm not the same person I was with any of my exes or even with Shannon."
While she listened to Gibbs, Jack chewed on her thumbnail to hide her smile. She was pleased that he was trying to communicate and found the effort he put into his answer more persuasive than his actual words. When he was done, she pulled her hand away from her mouth. "Okay. Let's try," she declared with a bright smile.
"Yeah? Won't be easy."
Jack slid closer to Gibbs and cupped his face in her hands. "I don't want easy. I just want possible."
"I can do possible," Gibbs said as he leaned forward to kiss her forehead.
"Does this mean I can call you Leroy? Or Jethro?"
"You can call me anything you want, Jacqueline."
"I like the way my name sounds when you say it."
"I'll keep that in mind." Gibbs pressed another kiss to Jack's forehead, then stood up. When he went to leave the room, Jack grabbed his hand to stop him.
"Hey, where are you going?"
"To make you a new sandwich. You didn't eat dinner."
"Don't tell Faith. It'll hurt her feelings."
"Dies with me."
