*ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO THE LOVELY STEPHENIE MEYERS
Chapter 23
July
Edward's POV
I never realized just how uncomfortable hospital chairs are. Some of these people have been waiting here even longer then we had been. You would have thought that they would put a little more money into these chairs. So many people sit here everyday for so many reasons. Some leaving this waiting room with good happy new, where other this room will forever hold the horrible news that they received here.
We had been here for almost four hours now. Bella having been in surgery for six already. She should be out soon and moved into recovery. From there we have to wait on pins and needles till tomorrow night to see if her lungs do good and start to heal. Her leg and hip have been aligned and she's now going to be in a cast for the next eight weeks. She's not going to be happy about that.
Her doctors have already told us that she's going to be kept in a medically induced coma for a week at the earliest. They want to give her time for her brain to heal.
I was so ready to see her. We haven't gone this long without seeing or talking to one another in a long time. It feels strange to not see and hear her. If I am feeling this way, then Masen must be out of his mind right now. He doesn't even have me with him right now. I don't know what to do. I want to be with her, but then I feel like I need to be with Masen. He doesn't even know what's happening right now.
Charlie and Sue still sat in the corner all huddled together. Sue had gone to the cafeteria and got everyone a sandwich and some coffee. I was very grateful for the coffee but the sandwich was still sitting untouched next to me. I appreciated the thought but I just wasn't hungry.
Esme sent me tons of pictures of Masen. Him eating. Him playing outside. Him watching Lego Batman after his bath. And lastly him all tucked into my old bed fast asleep. He looked so little in that huge bed. I missed him so badly and I wished he could be here with us.
I stood from my chair and stretched, feeling the popping in my muscles. As I was walking over to the window, I spotted my father walking out of the hallway doors. "Dad! How is she" Carlisle walked over, giving me a quick hug. "She's going to be alright. Her surgeons did amazing work on her lungs and they have got her leg and hip set wonderfully. It should heal quickly and make a full recovery" I was happy to hear the good news, but I picked up that he would only say her leg was going to make a full recovery, I just decided to leave that alone for now.
"When can we see her!"
"She will still be in ICU for a few days. Only one person can visit at a time and only one hour per visit" Only an hour! That's such a short amount of time to see her and spend time with her. I know it's to keep infection down to a minimum, but gosh it's going to be hard to only see her for an hour everyday.
"I will come and get whoever decides to know first in a few minutes" With that Carlisle walked back to the big doors and pressed the button, waiting for them to swing open. I threw myself back in my chair. My head falling into my hands as I tried to pushed down the sobs that were trying to break though.
"Charlie, you should go first. I'm a mess right now and I need to get myself in control again before I can go and see her" I didn't wait to hear his answer. I stood up and walked straight to the men's room. Leaning heavily against the counter, I stared back at my reflection as I tried to get my breathing to slow.
I needed Bella. The one person who can help me through this and help tell me what to do, if the one person who cannot be with me right now. She needs my help and I need to be strong for her and for Masen.
I cupped some water in my hands and splashed it up on my face and down my neck. I can be strong for her. I will be strong for her. I took some deep breaths and dried my face off. I felt better. I felt ready to go and see my Bella. I wanted to make her proud and show her that I could handle this.
When I came out of the bathroom, Charlie was now gone and Sue was sitting alone, she held a crumbled tissue in her hand as she sniffled and sighed. "They took him back a few minutes ago. Carlisle convinced them to let me go back there with him, but I just couldn't see her like that. She looks so pale and tired." Sue broke out into sobs again. I took the open seat next to her and wrapped an arm around her shoulder.
"She will be alright Sue. Bella is a fighter and she's stronger then all of this. Like she would ever leave Masen either. You and I both know that she would never, ever let that happen" Sue started laughing and nodding her head.
"You are very right, Edward. I just wasn't expecting her to look so..broken" I looked down at my feet. If Sue couldn't handle seeing her, how in the world will I be able to see her. I don't want to see her all broken. Why would someone do this to her. She's been though so much already, can't she just have a break already.
We sit in silence for the time being. Neither of us really knew what to say to help each other. This was unfamiliar territory for both of us. What does I person even say at a time like that.
The loud creaking indicated that someone was opening the hallway doors. Charlie shuffled through, his face was pale white, as though he saw a ghost. "You can go back now. I've got Sue and I, a hotel room not to far from here. We're going to try and get some sleep. You should too" Charlie patted me on the shoulder, then reached for Sue's hand.
"Yeah, I'll probably head over to my parents house and check in on Masen" I returned Sue's hug and watched them walk to the elevator. When I turned around my father was standing there holding open the door for me.
He wrapped me in a tight hug when I approached him. His blue eyes scanned my face before he spoke. "I was able to get them to lean off on the visiting hours just a little bit. But it's something"He shrugged. "You can have a little over two hours with her and then I want you home, son. You need to eat, shower and get some rest. Masen needs to see you Edward. Bella is in good hands here"
"I'm planning on it dad. I know I need to be there for Masen as well. It's like my hearts in two different places and I just can't be there for both at the same time. I don't know how I'm going to do this" Carlisle patted my shoulder, telling me that everything will be alright.
We made it to the her room. The whole front wall was made of windows which they blinds had been pulled down to give her some privacy. "You can touch her and talk to her. Just be careful to not pull on anything"
Carefully I pushed open the door, the sound of beeping and air whooshing filled my ears. The room lights had been darkened, only a dim light next to her bedside remained. Her room was small. She had a tv in the corner and a small compact dresser for her things. Her bed and medical supplies were taking up most of the small room. There was a chair pushed over to the side of her bed, so I walked over there, still not letting my eyes fall on her form.
Her hand was laying there next to the bed. Her arm had multiple bruises, that I don't understand how she could have gotten from a car crash. One of them almost looked like finger tips. Hmm. I picked up her cold hand and clutched it in between both of mine. I noticed she had blood under her fingers nails and it made me feel sick. Getting up from the chair, I went into her small bathroom and wet a few paper towels and rung them out slightly.
Walking back to her bed, I finally let myself look at her face, and when I did my eyes flooded with tears, that ran down my cheeks. My poor angel. Bella had a large bruise at the top of her head that was swelling. She had a bandage there, which is where she must have gashed her head in the crash.
She had tubes and wires everywhere I looked. There wasn't a part of her that wasn't bandage in some sort. A large cast covered her entire leg, starting where at her hip and all the way down to her feet, you could only see her red toenails popping through. She had just taken Alice for a pedicure the other day and her toenails still looked so pretty.
I wiped my face with the back of my hand and set back to my task at hand. Moving back to her side I picked up her hand and carefully started cleaning her fingers nails one by one till they were clean again. I moved to the other side of her bed and did the same thing with her other hand, being extra careful to not tug on her IV.
Using the last of the wet paper towels, I wiped her arms and face down. Bella took a shower every night or else she felt in, her own words. Yucky. I didn't want her to be laying in this bed all alone and feeling yucky, so this will have to do for now. While I cleaned her up, I sang her favorite songs and talked to her about Masen and how much he misses her.
I told her that I was going to marry her soon. That I already have the ring and everything was set in place. Charlie gave his blessing and so did Masen. All I needed was to get her to say Yes. Which she's already told me she would, all I have to do is ask.
I felt like my time had just started when Carlisle knocked on the door and peeked his head inside. "I'm sorry son, but they are getting antsy out here, it's time to tell her bye and you can come back in a few hours" I nodded and waited for him to close the door again.
"I have to go now, my love. Just know it's against my will, I would never leave you alone Bella. But I know Masen needs me and if you were awake you would want me to be with him no matter what" Tucking her hair behind her ear, I leaned in placing a slow kiss on her chapped lips. Tomorrow I would need to bring her some things from home. "I love you so much baby. Please don't leave us, we need you here" I gave her head one more kiss and a kiss to her hand, before I sit it down and pulled her covers up to her chin. "Sleep well, my love"
It was late when I got home. I guess it was technically very early in the morning when I got to my parents house. Carlisle stayed back at the hospital, he had to finish out his shift and he promised me that he would watch over her.
Mom made sure all the kids got a spare key when we moved out. She wanted us to feel free to be able to come home whenever we wished, just as long as we cleaned up after ourselves and made sure we always locked the door on our way in or out.
The porch light was left on for me. Using my key I unlocked the door and quietly pushed it close and locked it. "MOM!" I whisper yelled, my hand covering my heart as trying to slow it down. When I turned around there stood my mother clad in her robe and fluffy slippers. "Sorry Edward. I got the alert on my phone from the cameras and I wanted to come and check on you" Esme patted my back, and looped her arm through mine, leading me into the kitchen.
"Sue messaged me. Said you haven't eaten a thing since you got to the hospital over seven hours ago. So sit down and you are going to eat" I was honestly to tired to argue with her, and if I was really being honest here, I was way to hungry to deny food right now. Mom flipped on the lights and opened up the fridge. She sit out a large container filled with something and a can of sprite. "I made Oma's homemade lemon chicken, orzo soup. I thought it might make everyone feel a little better. Masen loved it, had two full bowls."
I watched as she scooped out a large serving of soup and stuck it in the microwave. "How was he? Did he ask about anything?" My mother shrugged. She handed me a glass filled with ice and the can of soda.
"He was definitely quiet. He didn't want to play after dinner, I found him looking at the family picture on the wall in the hallway and his little face just looked so sad. He asked if you guys were on a mommy and Eddie date and when you were coming back. I told him that, Bella had got a big ouchie and she needed to stay in the hospital. He wanted to go and see her of course"
"I wish he could see her. The ICU has such strict protocols and rules on visitation, I'm not sure they will ever let Masen in. Plus I'm not sure if he should see Bella this way. It's bad mom" My head felt like it was going to explode as I laid it down on the cool marble counter top. I'm exhausted.
The microwave beeping, sounding very loud in the quiet house. It seemed to echo making we worry that it would wake up Masen. Mom took the bowl out and sit it down in front of me. Reaching down she opened the drawer and handed me a spoon. "Thanks mom, it smells great" Esme popped up like she was remembering something and jogged over to the pantry. She stepped inside for a moment and then came back out holding a bread roll.
"You are very welcome. Now I want you to shower and get some sleep. Alice is going to watch Masen again today, just for a little while. I need to go to the farmers market and the grocery store. I would take Masen with me, but you know how much he hates shopping. I cannot blame him, it must be so boring for him to just follow me around" I listened to my mother ramble on about everything she needed to get from the store, as I ate my soup. It was delicious and just what I needed.
"I'm going to call in for the rest of the week and maybe longer. I will pass my cases off to a few buddies of mine, who will take care of that for me. I have a lot of money in savings right now, so that's not an issue. Since Alice has already agreed to watching him today, I'll probably just go pick him up after I see Bella" I finished off the last of my soup and bread roll. After downing the rest of my drink I put my dishes in the sink and started to wash them.
"Leave those, Baby boy. I will take care of it. Go to sleep" I fought not to roll my eyes at the 'baby boy' that slipped out and dried off my hands. "Thanks mom. I owe you big time!" I gave her a tight hug. I don't know how I would have gotten through tonight without my mothers help.
"You don't owe me a thing, honey. Now go" I left her in the kitchen and made my way to the second floor. My room door was cracked and there was a dim light coming from the bathroom. I closed the door behind me. The bed covers were pushed down and the bed was empty. I heard the toilet flush in the bathroom and chuckled. Not a minute later the faucet turned on and I heard him pushing his stood closer to the sink.
Turning around I grabbed some black sleeping pants and an old white shirt. Sitting down on the edge of my bed, I untied my sneakers and pulled them off along with my shoes. The bathroom door slowly creaked open and out stepped a very sleepy Masen. "Eddie! You is here" he ran full speed into my arms, and squeezed me as tight as he could.
"I missed you, Eddie. Is mama here?" His deep brown eyes scanned the room before settling back on my face. "Nana told me that mama got hurt" I frowned. "I don't want my mama to hurt, Eddie" I didn't really know what to say. So I just pulled him back into my arms and hugged him. What do you even say to a kid during a time like this.
"Masen, your mommy was in a car accident. Do you remember the other day when you saw the ambulance and fire trucks in the street? There was a car in the middle of that, so you remember?" He really set and thought about it for awhile, before his eyes lit up as he remembered what I was talking about.
"Yes, I know that. Grampy fixes them up and makes them all better, is he going to do that to Mama?" I nodded.
"He's trying to Masen. Your mommy has a lot of ouchies right now. The doctor put mama to sleep so her body can heal and rest, so she can get all better and come home to us"
"Why can't she sleep here, I can take good care of her too"
"She just can't Mase. She has to stay there with the doctors and take her medicine"
"But I want her to come home now!" He stomped his foot on the ground and crossed his arms. Masen was a pretty calm kid, but he wasn't a stranger to throwing a temper tantrum. They were rare but they happened. I mean he's still a toddler and sometimes feelings are just to big.
"I know you do Masen. I want mommy home too. She will come home when she's better: don't you want her to get all better? She needs the doctors and Grampy to help her heal" Masen opened his mouth to argue I'm sure, but was cut off by a big yawn. He giggled and rubbed his eyes.
"Come on buddy: we can talk more about this in the morning" I picked him up and placed him back under the cover and tucked him in nicely. "I'll be right back, I'm just going to use the restroom" Placing a kiss on his head, I turned around and grabbed my clothes, heading to the bathroom.
Masen was already fast asleep when I got back from the bathroom. He had teddy tucked under one arm, and his hand held his blanket against his face. He looked so much like Bella. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes again. I missed her so much, how was I going to get along without her.
Morning came all to quickly. It felt like I had just closed my eyes when I heard mom come in to fetch Masen, for breakfast. I kept my eyes shut and pretended to be asleep. I could feel Masen's eyes on me the whole time, but he needed to go and eat, I needed a shower, desperately.
After they left the room, I pulled myself out of my bed and started to find some clothes for today. I knew I was going to get there probably to early for visiting hours, but maybe my dad can get me in a bit early.
I grabbed a worn pair of jeans and a T-shirt, and headed to the bathroom. I went through with my morning routine and took the time to shave my five o'clock shadow. Bella didn't like the stubble on me. It always broke out her soft face and I wasn't going to have that.
I dressed and towel dried my hair, quickly running a brush through it, to at least try and tame it. When I stepped out of the bathroom, the bed was freshly made and Masen's clothes were laid out on the bed. My mother is always ahead of the game.
Slipping my sneakers on, I was ready to go and see my Bella. Making my way downstairs, I could hear Masen's laughter coming from the kitchen, along with the voices of both my parents. The living room tv was still playing cartoons and I could help but chuckle. Masen has an amazing way of getting what he wants. Especially when it comes to my mother.
"Eddie! I missed you" Masen immediately spotted me when I walked into the kitchen, almost as if he had been watching and waiting for me. "Good morning buddy. I miss you too" I picked Masen up and cuddled him into my side. He smelled like maple syrup, which he must have used on his breakfast. "Did you save me any food?" I poked at his full belly; making him laugh.
"I tried to eat your pancakes, but Nana stop me" He fake pouted at his Nana, making her smile. "You had already eaten three whole pancakes and two servings of scrambled eggs, mister" Esme took Masen from my arms and pushed me into a chair at the table. She plopped Mase down next to me, his giggles filling the room.
"Morning dad. How is she?" I jumped right to Bella, I knew it probably wasn't very polite, but I just can't think about anything else right now.
Carlisle eyed Masen sitting next to me, hanging on to our every word. "My patient is doing alright. They are doing wonderful after the surgery and we hope for a full recovery" I rolled my eyes. I didn't want that. Everyone is telling me that. I want to know, how she did after I left. Did she try and wake. Did she moan out or talk in her sleep. How are the tubes that are draining the blood from her lungs. I need to know that, not that, they hope she will make a full recovery. But since Masen was sitting right here next to me, I will ask him later on.
"Here you go, Edward. Eat up!" Mom said patting me on the shoulder. She had set a large plate of food in front of me. I had pancakes, bacon, toast and eggs. All of it in large amounts. When mom turned around to get me some coffee, I snuck Masen a piece of bacon that he had been eyeing. He quickly shoved the whole piece in his mouth, before mom could turn back around.
"Mom did you even sleep last night? We would have been just fine with a bowl of cereal or even a pop tart" Mom scoffed and looked as if I had slapped her across the face.
"Edward! I would never feed you a pop tart. I've been making a full breakfast for you kids for twenty years! You must not remember that you two had a warm full breakfast every morning, except for Sundays, but your father would take you two out for donuts before Mass" I can remember that. I guess I never sit and thought about the fact that she had to get up early just so me and Alice could have a filling breakfast.
"I remember, Ma. Thank you, this is delicious and so we're all the other meals you have made us" I finished up my breakfast, while mom took Masen upstairs to have a shower and get ready for the day. As soon as they were out of hearing, I jumped on my father for information about Bella.
"Edward, I will be honest with you. Her lungs are weak and she's needs another operation to remove tube and to check and make sure that her ribs haven't done any additional damage since she's been sleeping. Right now her body is just to weak to handle another surgery this soon. They can leave the tube in for a few more days, but any longer then that and we risk infection"
"Is there anything we can do?" I asked. There had to be something, anything we could do.
"I'm not sure, Edward. I would like to see how she's doing this evening and if she's doing better, then we will follow through with the surgery for tomorrow morning. But if it still looks the same or worse. Then we will put her on a high dose of antibiotics and hope that will stop the infection from happening"
"Damn it" I shouted, my fist slamming down on the table, making the glass rattle and tip of the table. It landed with a loud crash and glass went everywhere, a few pieces would have cut my leg if I wasn't wearing jeans. "Shit!...-I'm sorry...I didn't mean to do that" I jumped up and rushed to grab the broom before mom came in and saw her broken glass shattered everywhere.
"Edward, just calm down. I know it wasn't on purpose, just sit down and let me help you, son" I let myself fall back into my chair. I felt defeated. I had such high expectations for today, and this was not what I was expecting. Our one year anniversary is just a week from tomorrow and who knows what that's going to look like. I was going to be proposing to her next month, would she be out of the hospital by then? I have everything ready for her. I just need her.
12 days later
"Love you buddy, have a good day" Masen arms hugged my neck tight as I crouched in front of him. Today was Masen's first day at his new daycare. After a lot of looking and researching, I found an amazing daycare slash preschool not to far from my work. Masen will be staying in the daycare classroom till September and then he will officially be a preschooler.
These past twelve days have been a roller coaster to say the least. The days following Bella's accident, I spent most of my time there with her, that was till she ended up getting an infection and she she was put full lockdown to keep away any germs. No one but her doctors and nurses were allowed in her room, meaning no visitors what so ever.
After she was moved to quarantine, Masen and me ended up coming back home and I returned to work part time. Alice and my mom helped so much with Masen and bringing us homemade meals, so we weren't just living off takeaway for the time being.
As soon as I got off work, I would pick up Masen from either mom or Allie's house and we would go check out daycares in our area that had good rates. I wanted Masen to be right in the middle of looking for a new school. He needed to be comfortable there and not cry or be scared when we would drop him off everyday. I wanted him to want to go.
One day we toured Greyhound Adventures preschool and it was just what we were looking for. There was multiple different classrooms for all ages, so everyone wasn't just shoved in one room. Masen was in the going to be in Miss barbs room. She looked to be my mothers age, she had a thick southern accent, that just drew you in. Masen was taken to her instantly and same with her. Masen is such a cute and easy going kid, there is no way not to love him.
His classroom will only have 10 kids in there at a time. He has his teacher and teachers aid are both present at all times, to ensure the safety of the kids. I was very impressed by everything. I was shocked when they showed us to the middle of the building where there was a huge and I mean huge play room. They had play equipment in there that put actual, Children's playhouses or museums to shame.
I think Masen was set on his decision after the first ten minutes, but seeing the huge playgrounds, he had fully decided that he wanted to go here. There was even two little kids he met and they hit it off. It was actually siblings, twins to be more specific. A little boy and girl, the both took to Masen and were pulling him around the room showing him everything.
We had such a lovely day, but my mind was always with Bella. Wondering how she was doing, had her doctors come in and check on her today. Is the infection clearing like we hoped?
I just want her to be here with us. I wanted her to have the final say on where Masen goes to school. Tomorrow we got and pick him out a new backpack. He didn't really need one, but he asked if we could go, and I certainly wasn't going to turn him down. But to know that the next day when we went to get his bag, Bella wasn't with us. She wasn't there, cracking jokes and complaining about me spending too much money. I just wanted to hear her breathing, to hold her hand again.
The police were all over her car crash. They think that it was done on purpose. According to the CCTV footage the car that hit her was a black SUV with no license plates and the SUV took a hard left turn and crashed right into Bella's Honda. The worst part is you can see the SUV just sitting there and making sure Bella's car rolled into a ditch before it finally made its getaway, and having no means of helping her. Bella also seemed to be in a rush getting out of the school, like there was something happening. I know that Masen was fine, and I was fine, so I don't have any idea of what could have been upsetting her.
The police were pushing the doctors to wake up Bella for just a moment so they could find out if anything had happened, between the time she was leaving the school and the crash. But they say that the pain from her injuries could put her body into shock and it could set back all the healing she's been working so hard for.
The scream of a crying child filled my ears and cleared the fog of thoughts in my head. Turning my neck to look behind me, I found a little girl with long brown hair, crying and clinging to her father legs, saying she wasn't ready for school and she wanted to stay home. Turning my focus back to Masen, he was also watching the little girl with worry in his eyes. She was making him feel nervous.
"Everything is going to be alright, Maser. You are going to have such good time, I bet you won't even miss me!" I readjusted his backpack strap on his shoulder, giving him my best smile.
"I will always miss you Eddie" Miss Barbs was standing at the classroom door waiting for everyone to finish their goodbyes so she could start her day. "Give Mommy a kiss for me" I nodded. Pulling him in for one last hug, I let him walk into the classroom. Like magnets, those twins appeared and were pulling Masen off to his cubby. Showing him where to put his backpack and where he will be sitting at on the circle rug. It filled my heart to see him making friends so quickly, kids are so different at making friends. If only adults could be so easy.
I stood there for awhile, just watching him. His teacher noticed me and walked over. "He will be in excellent hands, Mr Cullen" I nodded. "I know, just with his mother being in the hospital, I worry about him more" I shrugged. I know this can't be easy on Masen. He's away from his mom longer then he has ever been in his entire life. He's starting a new school and the person he leans on the most is in the hospital.
I cleared my throat, my eyes blinking rapidly, trying to ease the sting. I would not cry here. Not in front of this woman and not where, Masen might see me. Looking down at my watch, I said. "Well I better get going. Please call me if he starts to seem upset. I will pick him up at three on the dot" With one last look at Masen, I turned and left the building.
Tears were rolling down my cheeks as I started the Volvo, I felt so angry, so mad at the fact that the world is continuing on like there isn't an angel laying in a hospital hanging on to her life. I don't want life to continue on without here seeing it. Each day she was in the coma was another day with Masen that she couldn't get back. Why would anyone want to do something like this. Bella is so innocent and has the most beautiful soul and if it leaves I can't see how the world would go on.
I know my father is worried. Bella should have woken up by now, but he won't say it. He's holding back hoping and praying that he won't have to say the words. It's been five days since they have stopped giving her the medication to keep her in the coma. It should be out of her system by now, but yet she's still sleeping.
Today she's finally being moved out of ICU and into a private room with no visitation hours. People can come and go, as long as they don't disturb her. Her doctors are hoping that the voices of her family will pull her out of the coma and bring her back to us.
It's been nine days since I've seen her in person. Carlisle calls us every night since she got the infection, just so me and Masen could tell her Goodnight and she could hear our voices at least one time before the day ended. I am dying to finally get to see her and touch her and to even hear her breathing. I've miss her more then I even thought was possible.
Two days ago was our anniversary. We have officially made it through the first year of forever and we couldn't even see each other. Bella and I had been looking forward to this day for months now. We should be in Seattle right now in a high end hotel feeding each other chocolate covered strawberries and drinking champagne. But that's not how it went.
I got up that morning and went straight to cleaning up the house and trying to distract myself. I haven't been sleeping in our bedroom since we've been home. I just can't sleep in there without Bella. It's so lonely and depressing, I just couldn't do it. Luckily we have a decently comfortable couch. Bella would have a fit if she knew I had been sleeping on our couch. Always worried about everyone else, that girl. God I miss her.
My cleaning binge was over all to quickly for my liking, but luckily Masen woke up a little early and was asking for pancakes. It took me over an hour and almost a dozen burnt pancakes, but I somehow managed to get two somewhat decent pancakes and he was happy. Mase didn't hesitate to let me know that they were no where near as good as what Bella makes. But at least he wasn't having to eat the one that were charred. No amount of maple syrup could have saved those pancakes.
Masen took a much needed shower and I cleaned up the kitchen once again. Mase had somehow gotten sticky syrup all over himself and the dining table. I'm not sure how much syrup actually made it on his food. But he seemed to enjoy himself and that's all that matters lately.
*Crash
I jumped at the loud crash that came from the bathroom, followed by Masen yelling "EDDIE!" From the bathroom. I ran into the restroom and found his laying on the shower floor and the self laying beside him with all of our bathroom products scattered around him. "Masen! What happened buddy?" I grabbed his towel and pulled him into my arms. Looking over his body, he seemed to be fine, I didn't see any marks or signs of bruising or swelling. "Are you alright?"
"I'm ok, I just gots scared. I was trying to be a big boy and grab my soap, but it was super high up, I reached up on my tippy toes and next thing I'm on the ground and the shampoo fell on my head" His hand reached up and rubbed his head.
"Oh I'm sorry Masen, next time just call for me and I can move it closer or just hand it to you. That's my fault, I put it up to high" Mase patted my cheek.
"It's ok Eddie, it was an accident and no bodies got hurt" Man this kid never fails to make me smile, even when I'm down. I don't think I have ever met a child as understanding as Masen Swan. Bella has done an amazing job raising this wonderful little boy.
Masen finished up his shower, after I put the shelf back up and made sure to put all his bath products where he could reach them. I always forget that I now live with two short people who can not reach up to the higher shelves. I'm just so grateful that Masen did not get hurt.
After his shower, we made Bella some new get well cards and I was making one for our anniversary, so of course Masen also had to make one for her too. By the time we got done, we had a pretty big stack of homemade cards. Towards the end, Masen was just starting to color random things, but I knew Bella would love them.
We partially cleaned up the mess from our art project and made our way to the local flower shop. I got Bella a dozen red roses and they put baby's breath to fill in some empty spaces. It was beautiful. Masen spotted some lilies of the valley and a cute little stuffed frog, he said that Mommy had to have them, and I wasn't going to deny him of that.
Sadly we were not able to go and give Bella her gifts. Since she was still fighting off the last of her infection, she was still not able to have visitors, so we dropped off all her gifts with her nurse, who promised this would go right to her room. Normally I gave everything to my father, but he was in a surgery, so I had to trust what this nurse said.
I wanted to just spend the day with Masen so that's what we did. He requested to eat at McDonald's and that's what we did. We eat kinda nasty greasy food and had some ice cream, before we were off to the arcade. Masen had been very interested in going to see what an arcade was all about, and I was more then happy to take him.
We spent the rest of the day at the arcade and then ended it up with a call to Bella to tell her goodnight and of course the Lego Batman movie with a big bowl of butter popcorn. Definitely took my mind off of how it should've been. Bella should have been there with us. We will have to redo this day when Bella comes home.
My stomach was in knots when I pulled up to the hospital. I was finally going to see my girl. Maybe even get her to wake up!
I grabbed her fresh bouquet of flowers from the passenger seat and yet another drawing from Masen. I also grabbed her duffel bag that held her some comfy pajamas and some fuzzy socks. Along with her pillow and one of her favorite throw blankets. I wanted to try and make her feel more comfortable. It's driving me crazy that she has to be here all alone. Not anymore though. I will try and be here everyday and every night.
The hospital was strangely quiet today. Usually it was quite busy, but seeing as it's just a Tuesday afternoon, I guess it's not crazy out of the ordinary. I'm sure it's better to have an empty hospital then a full one.
I got signed in and the nurse gave me my visitor sticker. So long as I have that on I can come and go from the hospital and not have to check in and out every time I might leave the hospital.
Today was Bella's first full day outside of the intensive care unit in twelve days. She now has her own private room with no visiting hours. I can come and go as i please. I can stay all day and all night if I wished, but I know I will need to try and keep a routine with Masen.
We all have high hopes that us being around Bella will help pull her out of this coma and wake up. As much as we all want her to wake up, her body clearly needs the rest. Her immune system is still very weak from the infection, her kidneys started shutting down from working so hard making her developed jaundice. Carlisle said that Bella's body took the antibiotic amazingly well and that helped take some of the pressure off the rest of her body.
Each day the yellowing in Bella's skin has faded and over time her body has started to heal. She's fully off any oxygen assistance, breathing all on her own. The tube in her lung has been removed from her side and the small gash in her head has healed and the stitches removed too. The bruising and swelling on her body has gone down and started to yellow and fade away. Now she will still have the cast on her hip down to her toes for another five to six weeks.
All we needed her to do was wake up. Once she would wake up and tell us what happened, we can start to move forward and then get her home with us. There is no better place for her then to be with her family.
The nurse desk on Bella's hall was empty, so I just went right into her room. Room 256. I knocked even though, I know she wouldn't answer. It was just polite. I stepped inside, the smell of disinfectant filled my nose. I hate the smell of hospitals. It's just to clean.
The lights were off and the nurses had pulled up the blinds so the sunlight filtered through out the room. She definitely needed the sunlight, it will help with the jaundice. Her wall was covered in all the artwork Masen and I had made her. In front of the window was a small dresser and sit on top of it was lined with vases and vases of flowers. Some from me. I know my parents and Alice sent her some and I'm sure Charlie and Sue did as well.
All of this really helped brightened up her otherwise dull room. It made me glad to know that if she woke up alone, she would be able to look over and see how much we all love and missed her. Because we certainly did miss her, I wish more then anything that she would wake up.
I finally let my eyes fall upon her and I feel all the air leave my lungs. She was so small. It looked like she had lost a good twenty pounds or more. Bella was already extremely small as is, but now she's just skin and bones at this point. Her cheek bones we're sticking out and her arms looked so thin and frail. How could they have let her lose this much weight. This could not be healthy for her.
"Oh baby. I'm so sorry" I couldn't hold back my tears. I sobbed for my poor girl. Reaching for her hand I carefully held it in my mine, feeling as though I could break it if not careful. "I'm so sorry I haven't been able to see you. You were just so sick and they made me stay away. You needed to get better" I leaned forward and kissed her head. Her hair was full of knots. I would have to remember to bring her hair brush over.
"Happy one year, my love. When you wake up, I'm going to ask you to officially be mine forever. I hope you say yes" I know she will say Yes. I hope she will say yes honestly. I can't wait till we get to spend the rest of our lives together. I'm so ready for both her and Masen to be Cullen's if she's allow it. Maybe we will even made a few baby Cullen's of our own.
We spent the rest of the day much like that. I sit there next to her, holding her hand and walking to her. I played videos of Masen. Told her about the new school he's going too. I told her how I decided to just give my case over to my Co-worker, it was just to much to deal with right now and our family was more of a priority. I mentioned that Masen really wants to get a cat and he's slowly melting me on the idea of owning one. Even though I'm allergic to them.
"So if you don't wake up soon baby. We might just have a cat here waiting with us" I rubbed her cheek. I wasn't ready for this to end yet, but it was time to get Masen. "I have to go baby. I will come back tomorrow and see you again. Know my heart is here with you Isabella" I gave her one final kiss on her chapped lips. "Love you" I knew she wouldn't be alone for long. Sue should be here soon and then Charlie and going to be joining her and staying there having dinner with Bella.
I pulled up to the school right at three and while most of the parents were in the pick up line, I had to go inside to get Masen since he is not in kindergarten yet. It seemed like I was the first one to his class as the door was still closed and no other parents were around yet. I peeked through the little window on the door. Their were all sitting on the circle rug singing some nursery rhyme. Masen looked so happy, wearing his biggest smile as he sang along. So far it seemed like he had a pretty good day.
Miss Barbs spotted me at the door and waved me inside. I opened the door and stepped through. I just stayed there near the door, not wishing to disturb what the kiddos were doing. One of the twins that Masen met spotted me and tapped Masen on the shoulder telling him that his daddy was here.
His head snapped up, his brown curls flying around his face. When his eyes met mine, they lit up the whole room. "Yay!" Masen hugged his already large group of friends, before booking it towards me jumping into my arms with so much force it made me gasp. "I miss you so much!" I told him. I really did Miss him. More then I thought was even possible. We have been spending all of our time together in these past twelve days, that it's like a part of me is gone when he's not in my sight.
"I miss you too. Did you see mama?" I nodded. I wasn't sure how to tell him, that he still couldn't go and see her yet. They are weird about kids being around the hospital equipment, worried that he would break something. Like I would ever let that happen. "Yes I did, baby. She's still dreaming away letting her body heal all of the ouchies she has" Masen little face looked so sad. I know he was chopping at the bits to go and see his mother. Who could blame him honestly.
"Did you give her my paintings?"
"Of course I did, who do you think I am! And you know what..Grampy and the nurses hung up all the pictures you have made, your mom. That way she can see them all the time" That made him smile. I knew it would. He worked so hard on each art piece he made for Bella. "Go and grab your things. We're gonna go, Auntie Al made us dinner" Masen's eyes lit up at the mention of a homemade meal that wouldn't be burned to a crisp.
"Yay! We get to see Lee,Lee" He hopped down, but grabbed my hand and pulled me with him to his cubby. "Miss Barbs, said that tomorrow we will have some pictures to bring home, but I don't have any today" He shrugged. I helped his put his backpack on, he wanted to tell his friends goodbye before we left, so I took the chance to speak with Miss Barbs.
"Mr Cullen, good to see you again." I shook her out reached hand. No matter how many times I've told her not to call me that. she still calls me Mr Cullen. It just seems so formal. Or like I'm at work or something.
"You too, Miss Barbs. I won't keep you long, I know you are busy. Just wanted to see how his day went"
"Don't you worry about that, sweetheart, when it comes to my students, I will make time" She smiled, patting my arm. "Masen did amazing today. You have a very smart little boy there. He's highly advanced for his age, so much so that I worry that this class is far to behind for him" She glanced over at Masen. "I know you've mentioned his mother is in the hospital right now, so I would like to keep him in this class for now. But I would really start thinking about letting him switch over to the preschool program. He's a little more ahead than preschool, but it will give him a good taste of kindergarten"
"He is a very smart kid and I will be thinking about it. But I want his mother's opinion on this, before we decide anything. Besides Masen likes your class and he has already made friends. I don't want to pull him from that" Masen has a lot of anxiety around going to school as is and I didn't want to push him into anything. There is a lot going on right now and we need to do this slowly. I really need Bella to make the final decisions on this. She's his parent and the one who knows exactly what Masen needs without even needing to think about it.
Masen said his goodbyes and we made our way out of town and to Alice and Jasper's house. Masen was very quiet on the drive and I would have worried, if he didn't end up falling asleep in the car. They must have wore him out. That's what I wanted for him. He had so much fun that he passed out on the drive home. I am so grateful that we were able to find this school for him. It's an incredible opportunity and I think this will really help in not only his learning, but also his social skills. It's good for him.
Masen slept the whole way there and didn't even stir when I pulled him out of the car. I situated Masen on my hip and used my free hand to knock on my sister's door. It only took a few seconds, before Alice swung the door open, her smile was blinding as she looked at us. "Looks like school really kicked his butt" I laughed, patting Masen's back. "Yeah he's out cold. You got a place I can lay him down?" Allie nodded and led me into the house and to their guest bedroom/ home office.
Alice pulled the covers back and I laid Masen down, taking off his sneakers and tucking him in. He looked so peaceful and relaxed. The small smile on his face told me he was having a good dream and I wish I could see what it was about. Though everything he's still smiling and right now that's all I need. I am working hard each day just for the two of them. I just want them both happy, healthy and together.
Bella POV
I suddenly became aware of everything. it felt like part of a fog had lifted, but yet I couldn't see, I couldn't hear anything. My body felt so heavy. Like I was under water and something was keeping me there. I tried to kick my feet but I was met with a sharp pain in my side going down my leg.
I wanted to open my eyes and see for myself, but they were just to heavy. I was to tired to fight it anymore. I just need to sleep for a minute. Masen and Edward will understand if I sleep a little late this morning. I'm just so sleepy. I don't think I have ever felt this tired before in my whole life. Even after giving birth, I wasn't this exhausted.
I remember that tired. You are so wore out and in so much pain, but you just want to stay awake and look at your baby. Now I'm just tired and in pain for nothing. I'm getting no cute baby out of this. But why am I, in pain? Why can't I wake up. Where's Edward! I want to open my eyes. Damn it!
I tried to open my mouth and call for him, but nothing came out. I was still stuck under the water. Maybe this is all just a bad dream and I need to go back to sleep. Please help me Edward. Wake me up and save me from this nightmare.
Sorry it took me so long to update! Time just slipped by and it took me longer then I expected to write this chapter. But I hope you guys enjoyed it!
Till next time~Jade
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