Chapter 3: Choice of Surrogate

"This is stupid," Chandler declared for the fifth time. Much as they had the other four times he'd said it, the others ignored him.

Having accepted Chandler's offer to donate some of his sperm, the question now became who should be the surrogate to carry the baby to term in her womb, seeing as Monica couldn't do it herself. Monica's egg would have to fertilized with Chandler's sperm artificially and then placed in whoever was chosen (or volunteered) to act as the surrogate.

For Monica, there were really only two options for who she trusted to carry her baby. The choice now was which one.

Rachel and Phoebe now stood in the living room of Apartment 19, to stand under the scrutiny of Monica and the boys. They couldn't help but feel like they were being put on for show, as if this was a cattle call. Or something.

Seeming to sense this, Ross smiled. "Just relax, ladies. This is just an informal questioning. It's not a competition."

Chandler turned to glance at his new lover. "Why can't you just pick one?" he wanted to know.

"Because whoever I did pick, the other would have their feelings hurt!" Monica stressed.

Chandler shrugged. "Why don't we just fertilize twins and knock up them both with one each? Then no one's feelings would get hurt!"

"Chandler!" Monica whacked him on the arm. "It doesn't work like that!"

"All right, ladies…" Ross called for order. "First question: who can tell me what brand of baby formula Monica would use to feed her child?"

Chandler wrestled down the urge to snort. This might not be a competition, but it sure felt like a job interview. He felt the process was oddly chauvinistic.

The questions continued like this, back and forth. Overtime, Ross took on the countenance less of a job interviewer and more of a game show host. It was like a beauty pageant for surrogates.

Once the questioning was over, it was left to Ross and Joey to tally up the scores.

"All right, ladies: and the winner is….."

Phoebe stepped forward, smiling softly. "Me." Her voice was quiet, yet assured.

Ross checked his notes, and nodded. Monica drifted close to her old roommate.

"Are you sure you want to do this, Pheebs?"

"Yes," Phoebe nodded, beaming. "I am." Her eyes started to flood with tears. "I'd be honored to carry your baby for you. If…. if you'll have me….."

Beaming herself, Monica began to cry. "Of course we'll have you! Won't we, Chandler?"

Chandler nodded dumbly, moved enough to envelop Phoebe as well as his girlfriend in a hug.

"Oh….. this is incredible! I can't believe it! I'm going to be knocked up with two of my friends' baby!" Phoebe bubbled.


Nine Months Later

The IVF treatment in which a zygote made from Monica's egg and Chandler's sperm went off without a hitch. As Phoebe progressed through her pregnancy, all of the other friends helped as best they could. At long last, it was time for the little one to be born. To everyone's shock and delight, it was actually two babies who came sliding out of Phoebe: a boy and a girl. Needless to say, it was quite the surprise, and for none more than the happy parents: Monica was ecstatic and terrified; Chandler almost fainted.

"We'll be OK," Monica promised him, lacing her fingers through his, where an engagement ring sat on her most prominent finger. She had been the one to propose, just a few weeks ago. Chandler had happily accepted. He had still allowed her to pick out her own ring. "There's no one else I'd rather raise our babies with then you." She kissed him soundly on the mouth.

Frank Jr., Phoebe's brother, whom Phoebe had been visiting when her water broke and had thus been roped into coming along was enraptured by it all. "Say, sis….. you…. you think maybe once you've recovered, you could be a surrogate again, for Alice and me?"

Phoebe thought about it. "Yeah, sure, maybe." A beat, and then she quipped: "I'd better not have triplets come out of me, though."

It would be quite the joke on her when, some time later, Phoebe would return to the delivery room, only to have to eat her own words.