Disclaimer: The characters and settings created by Blizzard Entertainment Inc in this story are owned by their creators. I do not claim them as mine in any way, shape or form. I am not receiving monetary profit from this story and no copyright infringement is intended.
Note: I just realized Turaho sounds like Grumpy Cat sometimes! Also, how is he worse than Shadowstep complaining about orphan whelps every few sentences? I really love Turaho. He's his own special sort of grump.
Also, there will be even more partying in Part II: Actually Good Tauren Pickup Lines!
Chapter 10: Bad Tauren Pickup Lines
Let's forget about the part when Alessandre, officially the worst Night Elf of all time, scared me witless. (I'm man enough to admit it.) So hey, listen to this:
"You mooove me, baby."
"They're mine, they're real, and they are as hard as diamonds."
Let me think. I know at least one other one…
"Free rides… for the ladies."
Yep. Those are the official Tauren ones. Hey, don't look at me, I didn't make them up!
Anyway, it's good to practice flirting before a big Bloodhoof Village party. We love to drink, to dance and, being really honest—it's exciting because single Tauren everywhere flock to these things. Why? We only have so many spaces to be as Tauren as we like, you know? A lot of traditions are fading away, being blended into the Horde in general. People crave a chance to be themselves, and not have it be weird. All people do, right? So for us Tauren, a party, any party in Bloodhoof Village, is like being sent to heaven and getting to eat all the cake you like.
"Hey, you into leather?"
Yeah, baby.
Oh, wait—I was going to get snatched out of Mulgore immediately after by Saturna, so why was I getting excited about flirting and meeting someone?
Ugh.
I think I hate the Sunstriders.
When I got there, Queen Saturna had clearly asked her Bloodknights to hang back and be more low-key. I say that because I noticed that they weren't drinking and they weren't even going near the food. It occurred to me that Saturna might have yelled at them about the Firewater, finally. Good. I hoped they'd try and have clearer heads with a damn Night Elf assassin was milling about. And those bastards knew about Alessandre before I even did.
It was also funny in a way, because she sounded so permissive about their drinking at first. So, there must have been another incident while I was away at the Venture Co. mine. Haha! And probably right at The Cat and the Shaman too, involving our drunk monk friend. Again. But by then, drunky monky would have been possessed by some crazy Twilight Cultist curse. I could only imagine those kinds of fireworks.
Eh. Bugger them. It was my enforced Paladin initiation, so I'd be a fool if I wanted to! I ignored all my responsibilities and I drank loads. If I was going to lie about wanting to be a Sunwalker, then drink could only help.
I did also briefly consider telling Saturna about Alessandre… but let's be honest, I wanted to drown out that burden, too.
All the pretty Tauren ladies three villages over had come to Bloodhoof that afternoon. So many cute spots! So many cinched up leather harnesses, woven skirts and eagle feathers! There were even some Thundertotem babes in the bunch… I could have killed myself for missing out on so much. I couldn't stay in Mulgore, I couldn't actually enjoy any of this.
Well bugger that, too!
I danced all over the place, the moment someone started up a tom-tom. I think I ended up in the middle of the dancing circle trying to learn a new line-dance the girls had made up. They're so cute you know, on those little neat hooves, going so swiftly, whisking their tails… I was acting a fool and I knew it. Maybe I was even trying to sabotage the event on purpose. People, Tauren and Blood Elf people, were starting to stare.
Cousin Brunho surprised me. I hadn't even known he was back home. But he was suddenly at my side and pulling me out of the crowd. I swore and shoved back. Brunho remained nice about it, "The party actually hasn't started yet, haha!"
Like I said. Good kid.
Brunho was already fully initiated. He was in his Sunwalker sunstones and bright blue beads. Then I looked past him and saw a line of likewise decorated kodos, and their Sunwalker Paladin owners standing in a stately line at the edge of festivities. All of them eyed me curiously.
I slurred, still tasting Firewater on my tongue. I chose to be a jerk and accuse Cousin Brunho of wanting to induct me right then and there. Well, I made no sense. Actually, I think deep down I was acting up on purpose. And Brunho was too good to be fazed by it.
He chuckled again, "Just… sober up a little, cuz. It's no help if you take your vows, drunk. The Bloodknight Matriarch is here and so is Aponi Brightmane—"
"Aponi! She's smoking hot! Heeeeey, smokin' Aponi!"
Brunho turned me around and shoved me through the crowd, back his parents' house.
The family longhouse resembled The Cat and the Shaman and a lot of long houses you might have seen in Thunderbluff and elsewhere. Log walls, our family totem carved above the front door… but inside, it was very lived-in. There were little trod-upon broken toys on the floor, and piles of pillows and bedding in one corner. In the evenings, after Uncle Roushin was done smoking his pipe outside and Auntie Freya had told her very last story, everyone undid their bedrolls, spread them out and then tried not to line up with their hooves near anyone else's head. That's how you sleep in a big, one-room house like that.
Also, the wild twins liked to wake up in the middle of the night and kick me. But after the first month of that, I learned to just drink before bed so that I could sleep through it. I guess that's also about when drinking before bed became bad habit for me. You'd think that kicking their older cousin at night, driving him to drink, would be a bad habit for Tarmin and Tina, too.
Also living in the house we had Moggie (mostly the family called her that). Moggie was the village kodo trainer, and then Crimsin. Those two were Auntie Freya's exceedingly responsible daughters, my grown nieces. Crimsin was the mother of those twins from her first marriage. Crimsin spent her waking hours being frantic about Tarmin and Tina while her wife Edie Halemount was away in Thundertotem raising eagles. Edie wasn't one of our clan by blood you know, so we tried hard to clean the place up and impress her whenever she did come back home.
Oh and by the way, you should have seen their wedding! The Runestalker-Halemounts, two ferociously independent, artistic Tauren women who met while on assignment in Highmountain, dressed head to toe in juxtaposed tribals and even feather headdresses. It's funny, Crimsin is more into ravens. No one could tell them not to go over the top. Auntie Freya went crazy trying to keep things at a reasonable level, but that little family of females is a wild herd all its own. So the ceremony was crazy beautiful, but then again, there was bird-themed, well, everything. They even managed eagle bridesmaids, because of Edie's two favorite trained war-eagles. The wedding reception had a duo eagle-raven fan dance performance that I, uh… well, I won't describe it. Come on, they're family. Even I have limits. You'll just have to imagine it. And then imagine why I try to stop myself from re-imagining it every once in a while.
My mother would have haaaated the whole thing. She is—or was—all about keeping up traditions and standards. I'm pretty happy for Edie and Crimsin though, they do make a cute couple. And ho man, were all the elders a mix of shocked or amazed.
I think right now, the Runestalker-Halemounts (this time, driven by their super-twins) are working together to design a family totem and I'm sure that's going to be covered in checkerboard feathers, too. No wait—black and white is chessboard. Right? And you know glitter is bound to be involved…
Wait, I'm rambling.
My point is, there were maybe fourteen of us living in that longhouse. I think I skipped naming a couple heads or three that visit on and off. Cousins of cousins who wanted someplace cheaper to stay while they looked for work near Thunderbluff. But big longhouses like ours were made for that, and there were plenty of three-fingered hands to help with cooking, cleaning and other housework, so we did fine. Though, right now, it didn't look like it. Probably, everyone was too excited about the party (and me finally leaving, let's face it).
Living in a giant longhouse also made getting laid a chore, by the way. I hadn't been joking earlier about finding a locked closet for me and Saturna.
Oh— I had noticed Saturna was wearing some red and gold, winged armor with a form-fitting skirt I hadn't had a chance to look at yet…
And then I finally looked down and saw Brunho was offering me a cold cup of water. We were standing in the middle of the empty house while my hazy mind wandered.
I rolled my eyes, drank it down.
"Better?"
I grumbled, "It'll never get better."
"I'm sorry that it's your party, but you can't… sort yourself out here." Brunho grinned innocently, then went for the throat, "Guess you'll just have to get laid in Silvermoon!"
Brunho not only thought that was funny, he also presumed it was actually possible for me. Bastard.
"I'll be working in Silvermoon."
"No you won't. You love the ladies. No Sunwalker rites will change that about you, cuz."
I couldn't keep up the depressing, pointless conversation at that point. I found an old hide-covered chair and sank down in it. Sighed real heavy.
When Brunho finished building me up about how the woman Elves would be all over me because Demon Hunters were so in for Elves these days, and that was totally a backdoor for us Tauren men with our horns and hooves, and also that I wasn't so old… He finally acted his age and apparent new station in life. He got down to real-talk.
"Alright. Tell me. What's really stopping you?"
I glared. Then, I gave up. I looked down at my hooves.
"…I thought about Zoca today."
Brunho loudly dragged the other dust-covered chair close by, almost ruining that moment.
"I even let myself… think her name. Just now… Just now is the first time I've said it."
"Yeah, in four years."
I folded my hands together. Then, I made fists.
Brunho had a dark face with black and white spots. He was able to give this innocent look when he wanted. Left over from successfully begging sugar treats off his ma as a kid, even when he was being mischievous. And I'm sure it helped him take his Sunwalker rites, when he could be just as naughty as me at times, but still needed to win the good guys over. Brunho had recently come back from the Western Plaguelands, Light's Hope Chapel and the Silver Hand, so that puppy-look would have worked there, too, with those hardcore, no-nonsense valiant types. And one day, maybe annoyingly soon, like before the year was out… If nature took its course, it'd all get started this very night at my party, too… Some beautiful Tauren girl would melt when she saw that same face, and Brunho would carry her off, ride into the sunset. And nine months later, their cute kids would inherit that same look. All while I was rotting away somewhere in a dungeon beneath the Sunspire in Silvermoon City, no doubt after this mission failed miserably. Still moping.
Some people just have these neat lives. Tidy, everything falls into place. Grow up, get a great position in life, get married, right on time. Lots of nice friends. Maybe not wealth, but a lovely, sweet life. Sun-kissed.
I was more moon-struck. A lone wolf wandering around, even hating other wolves. Nothing went right for me. Not to complain.
Ha! Not to complain… when am I not complaining?
Brunho interrupted my doldrums again, "Zoca died like any Horde soldier would have died. The only thing is, she was a dog."
"Who told you that? And she wasn't a dog. She was at least a third Ashenvale ghost wolf!"
"Would you believe Lord Maxwell Tyrosus said it? I told him about you. At Light's Hope Chapel, I just gave in… I had to confide in him, Turaho." Brunho shook his big head and horns, sorrowfully, "Been worried about you, man."
"What?! Why would you go telling my business—"
I cut myself off. Well… I guess you never do suffer alone. Other people really do care about you whether you like it or not. Whether you're getting basic empathy from a stranger in the street to whom your wretched mood is so obvious, or whether your own family is wondering what's suddenly happened to you. I'd been feeling so sorry for myself these last few years, I didn't realize that I was also plaguing my cousin's perfect life.
…Good.
"And Tyrosus said Zoca died like a member of the Horde?" I lowered my voice as if Lord Maxwell was somewhere in Bloodhoof and I might offend, "…He's a Human, right?"
"Of course he's a Human! He's Lord Maxwell Tyrosus!"
"Full Human? Damn… those Silver Hand guys are really compassionate."
We didn't bring it up again. The Alliance, a Human man, was the one who shot my beautiful dog.
Brunho persisted, "…So Lord Maxwell says that's the way you should remember Zoca. She went and scouted bravely. She returned to you the first moment she had a chance, when you called for her. She was a working dog, a soldier. You did tell me that working dogs are different then pets one time, right? That their whole mentality is different, that they need to do an important job, that they can't stay idle?"
"Yes, yes." I waved my hand, for him to get on with it.
"So Zoca, eventhough she got lost in the Barrens, she put herself to work. Right to work. Sniffing out where all their weapons and supplies were, just the way you trained her to. I'd say, in that way, Zoca managed to be a spy for a while, when they um… when the Alliance took her in."
"The Alliance shot Zoca, in the end, because she was a Horde dog. Yes, she would have done what she was trained to do, what I'd been doing with her for years. But I was also the same one who blew her cover. I whistled. I whistled for her." Then I stopped. The memory hit me all over again. Me seeing my silver wolf-dog in the field by the Alliance fort. No collar or leash on her, broad daylight. Me finally having that opening to call her. Then deciding, so selfishly, to just go for it and have her back by my side no matter what, "…I should have left her there, Brunho. She even had a… a little boyfriend. Some Alliance mastiff. I did see them playing around in the dirt. I did see how well she'd acclimated. But, in the end, I was the one who got selfish because I wanted her back. I ruined her life. You can't talk me out of that. She was just a dog. One of Mu'sha's precious, innocent creations. I used her for war."
"Hunters train pets all the time to fight. Hunters fight alongside their pets, together they become stronger. Aren't you the one who made sure I understood that, way back when? Hunters love their pets, they're bonded."
"Well, it finally occurred to me that it's wrong to do. Animals like that… Well, all animals should be free and in the wild. Why do we even keep dogs, or cats for that matter? Especially cats!"
"I let Patches sit in my lap and I pet her. She likes me petting her."
"NO! I mean—we feed them and we keep them, but that isn't natural. Dogs on leashes, fish in glass bowls, birds in cages! But why? Where would the animals really be if we actually loved them!"
"Turaho, this is extreme, you're not making any sense! People love animals! They make them part of their families. And then all the cats and dogs and fishes and things, they'd all be terribly upset if you just… dumped them off on the side of the road, wouldn't they? You're not supposed to do that to your pet!"
"Argh! You're the one who doesn't get it!"
Look. I knew that I'd made a radical statement. A really far-out one. I had never said it out loud before because I knew better, or at least a lifetime of service as a hunter should have taught me better. I sensed it was crazy, that I might be going crazy. I mean, I could see that I was grieving. I knew that grief was messing me up. But nothing that I used to know and accept seemed right anymore. Nothing was so comfortable anymore. There was this… fog. It surrounded everything I used to be. Getting blacker and blacker, all the time. I couldn't see through it. I kept working, I just shed what I couldn't handle and got on with things. No more Zoca? Fine, no more pets. Never again. Just… be a marksman, work without it.
But when it came to it, I knew that I was sort of… stepping back from being a hunter, a Pathfinder. One day, I was bound to just… ragequit. Ugh, more of Baine's slang, coming to me now. Or, had my young cousin Brunho taught me that one?
I got back on track, "Maybe I don't know what I'm saying. I'm upset. But it doesn't change the fact that I pushed Zoca far too hard. I was the one who made her die."
Brunho started up again and he sounded very frustrated with me. However, when I looked over, ready to shout at him some more, there were tears in his eyes, "…Don't you see? She wasn't a dumb dog who just forgot and joined the Alliance. Then you somehow swooped in and you-You're putting it all on you, Turaho. You're not focusing. There's a right and a wrong in this situation. A sure and clear way that the Light points us—"
"Well, it wasn't Zoca's fault!"
"I'm agreeing with you, actually, if you would just listen! Please, hear me this time—Lord Maxwell and I are both telling you—Zoca, she did really well. She did the best she could. She didn't have to come to you when you called, but it was her choice. She always made the best life she could, whether she was lost on their side of the war, or helping you on ours, she always did. Zoca's path was that of life and hope, that was what she lived for. Not death. Not cruelty, hurt and anger. Not what you've been doing to yourself, Turaho." He looked me right in the eyes, "No. You need to stop this. Apply Light to the dark."
"All you Paladins sound the same."
"Mu'sha did not put us on this earth for that! This is not An'she's Light working in you. You know that. So open a door, a window, something. You have the power—let the Light it in!"
Old line. It had been shouted at me several times. By Auntie Freya, by my uncle Roushin, all my dad's people. And my mother's relatives, too, whenever they came to visit. Everyone had tried to help me. This time, however…
"Did Lord Maxwell really say all that? A Human?" I knew the Silver Hand was a brotherhood, but still.
"Yes. Lord Maxwell also told me that the Alliance didn't even kill your dog."
Brunho waited for me to have my reaction to that. He watched me grip the armrests of the chair.
He leaned in, "Is that door to the Light open yet?"
"Maybe I… well, there's a doorstop in it. Possibly."
Once I calmed down, Brunho pressed it further, "It was one twisted soul. A single man who was capable of petting and playing with his new three-parts-Ashenvale wolf one day—"
"She was one-third Ashenvale Ghostpaw Alpha."
"…And then shooting her in the back of the head on the next, just because she happened to be running home toward a Tauren."
It didn't change anything, that detail. But then again, I could let it. I saw how I could let it… ease things. No, this wasn't about more facts, more ways of looking at the same damned situation. It was about choosing to… not spiral out of control. Not fall deeper into it. But instead, deciding to get out of it. Climb. Up. Toward the Light.
"Lord Maxwell and I prayed for you, too. We lit a candle at Light's Hope Chapel, just for you, Turaho."
"He doesn't even know me."
"But the Light does. And she wants you back."
I didn't know what to do with that statement. I mean, I felt what it was about, what it signified. My cousin was trying to say that he loved me. My cousin was trying to convince me that a strange Human out there, no an actual… Lord Maxwell, he loved me, too. He wanted to save me. And I was sure that if I walked up to this Lord Maxwell and queried his love for me, he'd correct me and say that the Light loved me, and he loved the Light. I mean, it's not a bad thing, it's just… so much bigger than that. That life, and the Light and love, it was all the same and it wanted me back. I knew that, through the Light, was the right way to see things.
Righteousness. It's not an easy concept to approach, but it is what Paladins are made of.
I wasn't going to go telling my cousin I felt that. Perhaps feeling the onset of a faith conversion is too much to put into words to anyone else, anyway. I did feel a bit terrified that I was starting to finally get it.
"Yes, Brunho. What that one Human, who happened to be in the Alliance did… He was a monster. I loved my dog. I would have done anything for Zoca. And I did."
"But that evil man, he shot the dog he was supposed to love." Brunho leaned in, "He did not have the Light within him. Sometimes, that's like a disease. He passed his hatred on to you. He darkened your world. Are you going to let the darkness win, and continue to perpetuate?"
I was wide-eyed, I'm sure. I'm actually not sure how I answered that.
Brunho nodded and continued, "Rexxar was once faced with the same decision, you know. Hate all things, or go on loving and fighting for life."
"Yeah, Uncle Roushin and I talked about that a few times already."
"Good. But now, you know why Rexxar made his decision. And why Lord Maxwell sent me all the way back to Mulgore with this message."
Brunho looked down, rubbed his big black and white hands together, then squeezed mine. "Turaho… please let us help you. Please. Take the oath today and mean it. Imagine, Lord Maswell is just one great Paladin. Your journey isn't over." He took my hand, "It's just beginning."
"Then how come—" I had to stop. I sounded like I was whining. I guess that's how hurt I felt, "Ma visits me this time of year, she's due any day now, and I also see all these other spirits all the time. Why doesn't my Zoca visit with me? If she's at peace, and she's good and the Light is with her and with me too, then where is she? Why isn't she in the spirit world? If she was there, then she would visit me, wouldn't she? It would have happened by now, it's been four years! Spirits visit me all the time!"
"I dunno, Turaho. Did you search the whole spirit world?"
I snatched my hand away, I wanted to hit him.
Brunho flashed that innocent puppy look again, "Turaho, Zoca is gone. What she does with her life, that is her own decision. In a way, you know, you're obsessed with the material. Your being comfortable, feeling comforted, your dog… but her afterlife doesn't belong to you. You just have to get on with your own life and pray that she's… that she's at peace."
"Think we could find out?"
"Don't be obsessed with it. Trying to hold a séance and loop Auntie Akeisha into this from the grave is definitely not letting it go properly."
"Only because most people can't hold successful séances, that doesn't mean I shouldn't—"
Brunho spoke over me, "Your dog is dead, Turaho." Then that annoying bastard told me, "Do you know how many lives and how many other people's dogs you could save, if you just got your act together, today, right now?"
I covered my face. It was always this obvious.
"I could, couldn't I?" Well, it wasn't just about the dogs, okay. My good works would multiply, I would add to the fertility of this world, its goodness and its greatness. Just as Lord Maxwell had sent my cousin with his message and lit his prayer candle for me. As a Paladin, I could bring more and more people to the loving bosom of Mu'sha who so wanted to forgive and grant mercy. Renew them with her Light and take the pain away. I was witness to that my whole life, wasn't I? And now this. She was only waiting for me.
Brunho nodded.
"Saturna… kind of sucks, though. I'll be working for her, next!"
Brunho smiled at me, "Bloodknights, yes, are a whole other thing. But, in some ways, I think you'll find that they're…" He arched a fuzzy eyebrow, "très moo-cool."
"Wait. That's my thing—I made it better, you didn't start off saying it that way."
Brunho stuck his tongue out at me. And he was really too big for that. Grown Tauren men's tongues are floppy, discolored… I reached over and gave his head a playful shove, so he wasn't facing me anymore.
"You'll see, Turaho. I met a Bloodknight while I was over there, you know. I can give you his name if you want."
"What's his name." I wasn't that interested.
"Sunthraze the Sly."
"What. So is this a stripper or a pimp or-"
"Shut up. He's famous, but in a good way. I only met him briefly. Sunthraze cracked us all up, I'd never seen anything like it! And he's good at what he does. He saved our hides more than a few times while we were up in the Ghostlands."
"Ghostlands! Wait, you were close to Silvermoon, then. Did you see the city?"
"Fel, yeah. Sunthraze took us bar-hopping. Silvermoon is a hot place, I don't care if the Scourge tried to mow it down. Damn, I'm pretty jealous that you're about to be assigned there, and it's your first assignment, too. You don't know how lucky that is."
I still wasn't convinced.
"Sunthraze the Sly kept our spirits up. Maybe you can look for him when you get there. In fact, I think he's even a Sunstrider, by marriage… I can't remember. But how cool is that! You'd be rubbing elbows with the Sunstriders."
"I'm already rubbing elbows with the Sunstriders, and it hurts. Saturna keeps jabbing me in the ribs, and everyone keeps saying that Kael'thas is part Banshee Queen or something."
Brunho enjoyed laughing at that for a while, then he got serious. "Don't mess with Kael'thas, though. Seriously, cuz. Don't do it."
"Why not?"
"Because he can melt your face off—how do I know? Everybody says that over there and they mean it."
"And this Sunthraze guy… did he mean it? Is he afraid of his own leader and, well, relative by marriage?"
"I didn't get a chance to ask Sunthraze that. Wait, are you investigating me right now? I hate it when you do that, cousin Turaho."
I shrugged. An old habit, Brunho should have realized I'd try for it.
"Well, cuz, that was an amazing tour of duty. Another thing, don't drink too much champagne while you're over there. That stuff is deceptive, it can mess you up worse than Firewater."
"Sunthraze the Sly, eh? Okay, I'll remember that name. It's a pretty stupid one, actually, so I doubt I'll ever forget it."
"Turaho. Today you learned that not every Alliance Human is a bloodthirsty killer. Well, not every Bloodknight is like Saturna Sunstrider. And not even every Sunstrider is like Kael'thas. By the way, you don't even know Saturna well, yet, so—"
"I know that she's in love with that fink Kael'thas."
"Don't try to pick up Queen Saturna, Turaho. I know that look on you. Promise me. Please."
I didn't make any promises.
"Well… I want you to promise Mu'sha, today, that you will fight to protect and avenge sweet creatures like Zoca, whether they even know it or not, whether they've passed on or not. That's the whole point of being a Sunwalker. Right?"
I put a hand on my cousin's shoulder. Then, I'll admit that I cried. But I was finally in good company for it.
Still, I felt uneasy. I might botch it all up. I just might. And I was taking on so much, so fast. I knew these things never happened overnight. No matter if your chieftan or the queen of the Blood Elves yelled at you to get on with it. I wasn't a young fool anymore, I knew that change stretched you and that it could be painful in new and surprising ways.
Three cheers for new kinds of pain! …Yaaay.
The sun set. I was outside again, my cousin Brunho and everyone else facing me. I stood alone. That is how it is meant to be at a Sunwalker initiation, you are to stand brave and stand out, knowing full well that you are taking on a whole new world. On my side, I could see them and through them, between the huts and longhouses, to the blushing lake and the red-green hills of Mulgore beyond. All that I would vow to protect with all of my strength. Now, it was mine in a way more intimate than any Pathfinder could know it. It felt to me like… Pathfinders walked over the land, chased villains across the grass, back into their holes. But a Sunwalker embraced it all in his arms. If it failed, then he failed. So then, there was no failure. Mulgore and her mercy, or her retribution, were a real part of me now.
Aponi said the final words, raised her hands with the column of smoke from the bonfire. The place was so silent you could hear our beads clinking as we all breathed and listened. Saturna stood on one side, being serious. She had her flaws, yeah. But, then again, she couldn't help looking sort of… strawberry? Saturna had this playful thing about her for me now, since our coffee date. I was less intimidated. She was dangerous yes, but also a silly person, wasn't she? Running us men, especially her husband, around in fun circles like a cute lion tamer… Deep down, she thought it was a riot and laughed her head off, I'm sure. I bet if I tickled her right then, she'd start giggling. I winked at her.
Saturna's smile slipped free. She mended it and straightened up again, but not before waggling eyebrows at me in an obvious, comical way.
Chief Baine was on the other side, looking ready for a war against evil itself in his fine white eagle feathers… I looked carefully his way, to see if he noticed I was flirting. Nope. Then another thought occurred, Baine was probably deep in his own mind, reveling in his fun game of Hearthstone with King Anduin.
That whole Anduin thing bothered me less after my talk with my cousin. Maybe it was possible for Humans and Horde folks to be friends. Some Humans, anyway. I wondered if Anduin, a Paladin, might be like Lord Maxwell at all? He'd made some pretty interesting leaps for peace and he was so young, too. Good Humans… A very new concept. And Anduin was a Paladin too, right? Or was he a priest? I had no idea, but the point was, there may be hope for our factions, yet.
I focused on Aponi once more. She was intense. She seemed to read that my mind was wandering as she spoke those words of ritual. Her voice somehow moved from over my head to the crowd flanking her, and back to me, right into me. If I winked at her right then, or imagined her giggling over a game board with King Anduin, she'd probably sense it and clock me right between the horns, so I cut out the mental shenanigans and tried to pay attention.
"…And what does the Light teach us?"
I said, "Hope and love."
"Yes, Turaho. And yes, to everyone here gathered. The murky waters of despair sometimes surround us…" she went on.
Water. I would be treading water for the first few days of my initiation, I could tell you that.
My part was coming up soon. I was sure I'd slip under and drown. I thought the final words would stick in my throat and Zoca would finally come and haunt me in my dreams, bark at me over and over again for letting her down, howling about how I should have been a better master and become a full Paladin much sooner.
You see? Guilt'll go any which way it chooses. So you have to be careful who or what you decide to blame. Everyone needs to focus on that greater cause. Brunho was right.
And then, speaking of water…
There was a small commotion across Stonebull Lake. I could see it from where I was. Everyone else was facing me, so they didn't realize it yet. A couple of fisherman, one of them was probably old gray Morty… yeah it was him. They were chasing after a smaller figure. Still tall, but more lean, more… Elven.
I narrowed my eyes.
And that finally did it. Alessandre. Marty and the other old Tauren fisherman were waving their fists and poles in the air, throwing rocks. But Alessandre was standing in water up to his knees, in plain daylight, holding his own fishing pole, smoking his pipe. That pipe would have been the thing to give him away. Marty's rocks, and their ripples, were meant to either hit Alessandre or disturb the water to show there was a stealthed Night Elf standing right there, pretending that Mulgore was his own personal playground.
That sonofabitch. The very idea of him catching a big fat trout, and on my watch!
Aponi raised her arms to the sun, "How much bigger is this than anything we've ever known in our daily lives? To be a Paladin, at times, is to be vengeance, yes. But it is also sacrifice incarnate! Our brother Turaho is about to make many very great sacrifices for the ones he doesn't know, for the ones who even hate him, as well as for those that he loves…"
I was furious. All that work I had done over the years, in Lordaeron, in Orgrimmar, in Ashenvale. All the things I did as a Pathfinder to keep my people safe, and it still wasn't enough. Being a hunter, tracking down a lone villain or a few, marking them for the authorities to pick up, or picking them off… it was like whacking flies with your tail, wasn't it? It did no damned good. Not really. Because men like Alessandre were still standing in my lake, fishing!
A rock whizzed past his head then, and Alessandre sort of weaved easily, re-cast with his fishing rod.
"And that is why all Paladins…" here Aponi probably did not mean to pause, but the presence of defiant Saturna, right there, must have stung her, "Are united under the Silver Hand. We are a brotherhood and a sisterhood—a family of people, of mortals, committed to the immortal. To the eternal goodness in this life…"
So true. As a Paladin, you had the Silver Hand and the… Knights of the Blood Nexus, and whatever else. A world-wide effort more than happy to sweep skunks like Alessandre with his rapier clear off the face of this earth! If I had been a Paladin, would today have gone differently? Would Alessandre have tried to chat with me like he wasn't an enemy to life and goodness itself, by tempting me to betray my people and the Horde!
And then Alessandre noticed me staring at him. He waved at me like we were old buddies.
Aponi's voice surfaced again, "What say you, Turaho? Are you with us?"
That rotten…that slimy… Ugh! I hated Alessandre, I was so sure of that by now! Yes, this was bigger than Zoca! It was bigger than Bloodhoof and Mulgore and even me. I at last realized that had to do something and it was not mope and be afraid.
No. Damn. More.
And why the hell was I keeping them waiting?
"I, Turaho Runestalker swear, by the Light of Mu'sha's sun and her moon, that I will do everything that I can to PURGE this world of the darkness! In every corner! In Orgrimmar, in Thunderbluff, in the Undercity, and in Silvermoon. PURGE!"
I think I scared a few people. Well, I'd made it loud.
Loud. Proud. And, Paladin!
The Sunwalkers at last stepped down and gathered around me, shouting the oath, too. We held onto each other's shoulders, began to leap into the air like new calves, but our voices bellowing. Together we were a wardrum. One.
The Bloodknights did nothing. I supposed they had their own version back in Silvermoon. It probably involved spraying each other's hair ritualistically or something. Saturna smiled down at me, delighted. She could probably tell that I really meant it. I'm glad I convinced so many people. I'm glad that I finally convinced myself.
Brunho got in once the shouting and jumping was done. He shook my hand first, "You're supposed to say 'pledge', cousin Turaho. 'I pledge to clear this world of darkness…' well, nevermind. You did well. You did really well!"
"Ah crap! Haha! I guess I messed this up too, just like anything else."
Some other Tauren with reddish fur bellowed more laughter and said, "No, I think it just means you're a retribution paladin." His sun-yellow headdress was pretty smart. I got distracted, wishing hard that I'd get mine before leaving Mulgore.
Brunho agreed, "Yeah, that's about right. Hey, that means you're just like Queen Saturna!"
Saturna's name brought me back, "Hey, is anyone going to do anything about the blatant Night Elf fishing on the lake over there?"
Saturna had been moving toward me in the crowd. She stopped when she heard and shouted an order, immediately.
Then, it was amazing. A cavalry of Thalassian Chargers and Sunwalker Kodos were suddenly crashing through the water, together, right at Alessandre on the far bank. Didn't matter who gave the order, I guess. They all were trained to fall in line and follow the top Paladin who gave a command. I couldn't help but feel that the Bloodknights were missing out on something under Saturna. Suppose one day the Silver Hand up and decided they weren't going to listen to people like her?
But right now, though? White water, wild whinnies, hollering warcries, kodos thundering on, golden Light flashing. Kodos, horses, Tauren, Blood Elves, united. All unleashed together, and all on my word. Just one word from me that I was being messed with, and they pulled together. They jumped on it to defend their own. No lone Pathfinder could summon power like that. But now that I was one of them, yes I could. It was the best thing I ever saw.
They must have stirred up half the lake, rampaging like that. I just barely saw old Morty shrieking that they'd scare away his fish.
…Idiot.
They churned around awhile, sweeping their weapons through the air, slicing high arcs of white water with their gold spells being blasted into it. But Alessandre had vanished. He would live another day to torment me with being so good-looking and ferocious.
Not a compliment. I think?
Anyway, I would be ready for his skinny Elf ass. Me and my Paladin buddies.
Still, it was a great way for me to begin. Many things are uncertain for me now, sure, but taking my oath that way, on that day… I already knew it was the best decision of my life.
Zoca would have loved it. It even kind of felt like she was with me.
It was tiny, it was brief. It happened while I was watching the crash of water and metal plate, delighted that all these new friends were mine and that we really could heal the world together. I remember I was just standing there, amazed. My hands were at my sides. There was nothing around me. Couldn't have been, because everyone had mounted up and left me. The villagers, including Baine, were hanging back, making sure folks were safe. I was on my own. Me, air and fading sunlight. And I swear to you… I felt her cold nose in the palm of my right hand.
So, at last, I was forgiven.
Or, perhaps I had accepted there was nothing to forgive?
But not even that mattered any longer. Thank you, Lord Maxwell. Thank you, Brunho. Thank you Aponi, and Baine and even Saturna. I was thirsty and so you made me go to the water. You showed me how to drink. Whether you dunked my head in for your own reasons, or you pleaded with me nicely… finally, I did it. Only I could take that drink.
The gift of being a Paladin is so magnificent, I can only look back on that day with deep gratitude. You were the ones who enabled me to survive the greatest storm of my life, after my mother died. Deep down, I did not think I was going to make it. I sort of thought, 'Gods no. Not another one. Not Zoca. I can't take another one…'
But here I am. Thank the Light.
And now that side of myself was finally settled and at peace…
Time to get some BOOTY before going out of town. Wooo!
