On the planet, Marley, there was a weird-ass civil war going on. Kara, Brainiac 5, and Nura stood on top of a Marleyan military camp on top of a plateau overlooking a large desert. "So, get me up to speed on what's going on here," Kara requested.

"Eldian scouts are trying to prevent a mass genocide against the Marley and all other humanoids on this world," Brainiac 5 began.

"Sounds like my gang of heroes," Kara smiled.

"However, one of their own scouts is responsible for the mass genocide in the first place and has the backing of the Eldian people, government, and military," Brainiac 5 continued.

"Oh...," Kara said, taking it back.

"That said, the mass genocide is in response to Marley's persecution of the Eldians over the course of one hundred years. The Marley kidnapped and trained Eldian children to do their bidding, transformed Eldian prisoners into mindless giants, destroyed Eldian walls and their cities, and committed mass murder on Eldian civilians," Brainiac 5 clarified.

"I kind of see where they're coming from then...," Kara allowed.

"It should be pointed out that the Marley persecution of the Eldians was due to the Eldians invading Marley lands, committing mass murder, and creating a short-lived Eldian Empire. This invasion was only made possible by the Eldian king forcing a teenage girl to be his slave, turn into a giant monster, kill scores of people, force said slave to have his children, and then have those children eat her," Brainiac 5 concluded.

"I'm feeling a roller coaster of emotion right now," Kara admitted.

"Regardless of the past, if we do not stop the rumbling, sentient life on this planet may go extinct," Brainiac 5 said seriously.

"Right," Kara nodded. "So...what the fuck is this rumbling aside from all that stomping I'm hearing in the background?"

"The Eldian leader has transformed into the Founder Colossus and has an army of roughly one million Eldian Collosuses under his command to stomp out all sentient life. The heated steam these colossuses emit is capable of lighting any lifeform on fire," Brainiac 5 said.

"That sounds like the least efficient way to commit planetary genocide," Kara scoffed.

"It's working so far. Nearly eighty percent of sentient life has been killed," Brainiac 5 replied.

"Holy shit!" Kara said stunned. "What kind of defenses do the Marleyans have?"

"Their technology is akin to the 1900s Earth," Brainiac 5 replied. "Air blimps, primitive aircraft, artillery cannons, Gatling guns, bolt-action rifles, primitive explosives."

"That isn't going to do shit," Kara judged.

"Indeed," Brainiac 5 agreed.

In the distance, all three of them were able to see the enemy approaching. On the horizon was a storm of dust and steam that made up a line of thousands of colossuses approaching. In the middle of the Colossus army was a pissed-off-looking giant head, a long skeletal neck, long ribs that touched the ground, and an extremely long spine. The spine not only hosted the ribs but also spikes that went high into the air at an angle. At the end of the spine was a comically small bony ass and two skeletal legs. The head of the Founder Colossus had long straight flowing hair that nearly touched the ground and, from his shoulders, had two dangling arms. The Colossus army, itself, was 60 meters high each. The Founder Colossus was 350 meters high and 600 meters long, comparable in size to an Athena-class destroyer.

In a last-ditch effort to stop the rumbling before it reached the base, the Marleyians sent out several blimps against the enemy. "We're saved!" the Eldian refugees cried out.

"Attention, all airship units and every soldier in the fortress, this fortress will be the last bastion left to us. Not going to lie, the pressure weighing down on you is immeasurable but no matter the outcome, the responsibility lies solely on you and you alone," the commander said over the speaker.

"Oh, my back!" one artilleryman said, unable to withstand the weight of the situation.

"Get back to your post, piece of shit," his squad leader scolded.

"I make no apologies for anything including that monster approaching. If by some miracle, we survive, we will never repeat the same mistake and allow the Eldians to live. Fuck those guys," the commander concluded.

"They will not succeed," Nura said softly.

The blimps got into position above the Founder Colossus and began dumping oil drums. The oil drums exploded on impact creating a firestorm that began to roast the Colossus army. In retaliation, the Founder Colossus materialized a Beast Big-foot-looking Colossus on its spine. The bony material of its spine was able to liquefy into Colossus giants. Utilizing projectiles of bone, this Beast Colossus threw them at the blimps at incredible speed blasting holes through their hulls and exploding them. All the blimps ended up torn to pieces or blasted apart. The Colossus army continued on its way slightly inconvenienced.

The Marleyans now only had three lame cannons against the enemy. "Well...shit," the commander muttered.

"I suppose I should bail them out and be their White Savior," Kara rolled her eyes.

"Everyone here is white," Nura pointed out.

"But they're speaking a language very similar to Japanese," Kara pointed out.

"The pro-Marleyan Eldian recruit who is willing to battle the Eldian Founder Colossus to save Marley is ready for battle," Brainiac 5 reported.

"This better fucking make sense after we're done," Kara demanded.


The Vindicator cruiser approached the Founder Colossus through the cloud of steam given off by the Colossus army. As they approached, the Founder Colossus's anti-aircraft Beast Colossus threw bone debris at them. The Vindicator cruiser got peppered up from the speed of the projectiles. In attendance were Kara, Nura, Brainiac 5, Brim, and Eldian recruit: Gim Allon.

"Target is Eren Mick Jager. His actual essence is somewhere inside the Founder Colosus," Gim briefed the others.

"It's the ass, isn't it?" Kara assumed.

"Probably," Gim agreed. "He's merged with a jelly-worm-looking creature that gives him his power. If we destroy him, we end the rumbling."

"Isn't that how it always is? You kill the leader and immediately, you've won the battle," Kara mocked.

"The Founder Colossus can liquify its own bone structure and produce smaller Colossus units that will try to kill us," Gim said. "Those Colossues will have random abilities and weapons. Once we destroy them, they'll just regenerate again."

"Team A is simply me. I'll go straight for the ass and nuke it. Team B will go for the head to decapitate this son-of-a-bitch. Nura, will this work?" Kara asked.

"Yes but it will be weird," she replied.

Kara gave her an odd look not sure how to take that. "Remember, team. I could handle this whole thing all by myself but I won't always be there to win every battle because I might be busy or lazy. This is your time to show what you got."

The Vindicators dropped out of the cruiser's ramp and glided down to the Founder Colossus' spine. As they did, the Beast Colossus threw more bone pieces at them. The Vindicators dodged the pieces and landed on the spine. Gim went straight for the Beast Colossus, expanded to giant size, and tackled it. The two giants fell onto the spine in a heap. The Vindicator cruiser then flew above the Founder Colossus and out of range.

The Vindicators gathered together with Gim over the top of the Beast Colossus that had been temporarily killed. "Alright, in one minute I'm nuking this place so you guys better get clear toward the head. Eren will probably anticipate this move which means he'll move toward the front," Kara said.

The Vindicators took off toward the head leaving Kara behind. "It's so humid here. Makes me uncomfortable," Kara said peeved. Suddenly, a liquid bone tongue from a Colossus bull snuck up on her, coiled around her body, and placed itself in Kara's mouth. The bull then took Kara into its mouth and ran off. The Vindicators kept going unaware of what had happened.


In the middle section, Gim wrestled various liquid-bone Colossus manifestations like a boss. However, he soon became overwhelmed by three Colossuses at once. Nura fired on the Colossuses with her hands, taking them out. "Why hasn't Kara nuked the rear yet?" Brin asked concernedly.

"She must have been captured and is now incapacitated," Brainiac 5 theorized. "Any attempt to rescue her will be futile with dozens of Colossuses blocking our path."

"We can't be easy-going about this. I'm not even friends with Eren, so...," Brim said determined.

"Hey, I'm not friends with him either," Gim said defensively.

Brim took off toward the head with explosives all around his neck and torso. He got on all fours, became a wolf-beast, and ran off at full speed. Brim expertly avoided the Colossus defenders, leaped onto the upper spikes, and went spike-to-spike until he reached the neck. As he landed, he placed a line of explosives wrapped around the Founder Colossus' neck. "Be gone, asshole," Brim said as he was about to push the detonator.

Brim was suddenly stabbed through by a trident coming from a Colossus defender. Devastated by the attack, Brim lost the detonator. Meanwhile, a Colossus defender ripped into Gim's handsome face. Nura fired off beams of light at the Colossus defenders while Brainiac 5 swung around the spikes with his cables and then used swords to swipe the back of the neck, the only weakness of the Colossuses. Gim beat down a Colossus defender and went running toward the rear to rescue Kara. The remaining Colossus defenders ran after him. Nura fired at the Colossus defenders from behind taking several of them down.

As Gim made his way, a giant Colossus defender took hold of him with its hand and slammed him down against the spine. Gim, now normal-sized, fell off the spine and nearly fell to the ground below before being wrapped around by Brainiac 5's energy cable. "You think we can still win?" Gim asked Brainiac 5, exhausted and defeated.

"No," Brainiac 5 replied.

There was an awkward silence between them. "Then...why?" Gim wondered.

"Vindicators fight to the very end and don't quit," Brainiac 5 told him.

"But why?" Gim asked.

"When you die, there is no additional data for me to collect. So you must live and continue to fight," Brainiac 5 reasoned.

"Barney...the fuck?" Gim asked dismayed.

Nura swung around the ribs with her energy cables and blasted the head of a liquid bone snake attempting to eat Brainiac 5 and Gim. She swung toward them and created an energy bubble. The three of them rose from the Founder Colossus out of range. "Would have been nice to have used this before," Gim remarked.

"It won't matter," Nura said cryptically.

The Colossus defenders took up liquid bone bows and arrows and fired at them. Nura evaded the thick arrow fire and landed Gim back onto the spine toward the head. Gim went to Colossus-size and battled Colossus defenders armed with bone swords. He wrestled with them, threw them off the spine, and headbutted them, and used their own weapons against them. Gim got stabbed through his left hand disabling it.

Brim had a trident through his back and chest pinning him in the air. Nura landed on the spine and fired a beam that severed the trident staff. Brim landed on the spine, took the trident out of his body, and then got his face smashed by another Colossus defender. Brim quickly regenerated from the hit and began tearing out the throats of Colossus defenders by leaping on their backs.

"Don't worry about me. Get the detonator," Brim shouted as he was kept busy.

Brainiac 5 went forward only to be knocked off the spine, he attached a cable to the spine wall and then brought himself back up. "A hundred victories won't do shit against a million enemies," Brim said dryly.

Gim went down as he was hit with several bone arrows. Nura flew around the Founder Colossus and landed toward the end. Upon landing, Nura fired on the Colossus defenders as she kept an eye out for the bull that had captured Kara. She fired from her hands, formed energy cables around Colossus defenders, and then tore them to pieces.


Meanwhile, Marleyan civilians fled in terror as the rumble reached them. They happened to reach a cliff with the ocean below. As the rumble advanced on them, the civilians clustered about the edge of the cliff. Some ended up pushed off the cliff to their deaths. To their credit, some civilians crowd-surfed young children and infants to the middle of the formation away from the cliff and rumble.

As this was happening, Kara finally awoke in a new plane of existence. It was night, the ground was sand, and a pillar of light could be seen in the distance. "What the fuck is this? Where the fuck am I?" Kara wondered. "Am I in a dream of a dream? Last thing I remember, a bull had its tongue deep in my mouth."

Kara then eyed a young man making a sand castle. "Eren, I take it? What's your deal, asshole?"

"A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, a jelly-worm landed in our ocean," Eren explained.

"Yeah, sure, but was it absolutely necessary to put a bull's tongue down my throat? Was that really necessary?" Kara asked skeptically.

"I let myself get carried away," Eren admitted. "I'm sorry."

"Maybe you should apologize to all the millions you've killed with your nonsense, hmmm?" Kara suggested.

"Yeah, you're right," Eren agreed. "I just wanted to be a total monster so my friends would be heroes when they stopped me. Then, every surviving person would owe them a debt of gratitude. It would make them the most respected people on the planet."

"That's fucked up. You're fucked up. No one is going to take that idea seriously. You've just fucked the reputation of Eldians for all time," Kara told him off. "No one sympathizes with Nazis even if some of them did heroic deeds here and there. You're still fucking Nazis."

"What about General Rommel and Colonel Stauffenberg? People think they're heroes," Eren pointed out, reading her mind.

"Damn it, you're right," Kara allowed.

"I slaughtered people, caused Eldians to kill each other on Paradis, and dragged my dear friends into combat, without ever knowing if they would survive all for the lolz," Eren confessed. "My head is all messed up."

"Sounds like it," Kara agreed. "Anything in particular or just everything?"

"I have romantic feelings for my adopted sister," Eren admitted.

"Don't we all?" Kara said sympathetically.

"And she likes me, too. After I die, I don't want her to find anyone else. I want me to be her only love for the rest of her life," Eren said, self-absorbed.

"That's really pathetic, dude. Were you born fucked up or did you have to work on it?" Kara wondered.

"I have no choice. I don't want to die. The others didn't want to die either, probably. I trampled eighty percent of the world's population," Eren said subdued.

"Yeah, but why?" Kara asked confused.

"To balance the world's civilization to Eldian's level so there won't be any reprisals," Eren answered.

"That isn't going to end the conflict. You can't go eighty percent. It's all or nothing, dude," Kara told him. "The survivors are going to punk your ass at the soonest opportunity. This is totally pointless."

"It's already been determined," Eren said dismissively.

"Yeah, by you," Kara pointed out.

"I believe in total freedom and, in this case, total freedom to commit...genocide," he said wide-eyed.

"That's not a solution. This reads like a bad joke," Kara said dismissively. "Just when I thought I was getting to understand you, you go full-blown crazy on me."

"I wanted to level everything," Eren said despondently.

"Yeah, but why?" Kara pressed.

"I don't know why. I just wanted to do it. Why? Because I'm an idiot," Eren finally realized.

"Glad we got that straightened out," Kara mocked.

"I was an idiot with too much power. That's why this outcome was inevitable. That's all there is to it," Eren said glumly.

"I get it, sort of, not really. Wanting to erase people from the world? I've felt that way, too. By people, I mean specifically individual bad guys, not entire demographics. In the past, I was a hero to twenty percent of the world, Western Civilization. The other eighty percent were skeptical and suspicious of me for reasons I cannot fathom," Kara said.

"Kara, it's time," Eren said finally.


Gim was on the ground all busted up with Colossus defenders all over him ready to scythe his head off. Brainiac 5 used cables to bring Brim over to Gim. Nura continued to fight against the Colossus defenders but finally got bitch-slapped into a vertebra. Brim leaped up and sliced open the neck of the Colossus defender over Gim. Brainiac 5 targeted the bull and blasted its head off with his laser rifle arm. Kara was then released from the bull's body.

Kara got her bearings and then rapidly sliced off the heads of all the Colossus defenders dropping them. Brainiac 5 turned to Brim. "You did well but the detonator was always with me. It can be triggered remotely."

"You, damned suicidal dumbass," Brim said angrily.

"Don't be absurd. I can't be suicidal with countless drones," Brainiac 5 corrected.

"Now, let's do the same plan again but with me not getting a bull's tongue deep in my throat," Kara said annoyed.

"This is some bullshit," Brim said as everyone went back toward the head again. Once they got to the head again, going through Colossus defenders once more, Brainiac 5 triggered the detonator...remotely.

The Founder Colossus' head was blasted off and fell to the ground. A jellyworm immediately sprouted out of the neck and went to the head. Gim went to giant-size and took hold of the jelly worm to keep them from connecting.

Kara went Prime and nuked the Founder Colossus' ass blasting it apart. The explosion created a giant fireball and mushroom cloud that sent bones in all directions. The explosion went through the Coloussus army as well, blasting them apart. The rumbling was over.

The Founder Colossus' head exploded in its own nuclear fireball. A Colossus emerged from the explosion. It was Eren in giant form. The jellyworm still crawled about wanting to make contact with Eren and restart everything. "This nightmare won't end until we take down Eren," Gim determined.

"Well...no shit," Brim agreed.

"It would appear there is no risk the Eldian refugees will turn into Colossuses and be under Eren's control," Brainiac 5 mused.

"Why is that?" Gim asked confused.

"The Marleyans took the precaution of killing them all," Brainiac 5 noticed.

"Damn, that's cold," Brim remarked.

"Isn't it interesting how brutal decision-making seems to always get the job done with lower risk," Brainiac 5 mused.

Gim went to Colossus size and confronted Eren straight-on. "You, really do enjoy hell, Eren? We'll do it your way, to the end!" Gim shouted as he clashed with Eren. Meanwhile, Brim, Nura, and Brainiac 5 did what they could to keep control over the jellyworm.

Eren and Gim hammered away at each other with brutal punches. Eren was doing more damage though as Gim's face was all fucked-up. Kara flew at super-sonic speed to the area and looked for an opening. Gim noticed her and forced Eren's face into position. "I'm not apologizing," Kara said resolved as she dived toward Eren, cocked her fist back and punched through his teeth, and then landed inside his mouth.

Kara then shot toward the real Eren, a head hanging to the roof of the mouth by a spine. Eren opened his eyes as she approached with a resigned expression. Kara sliced off his head with her knife hand and took hold of it. The battle was over.


The Vindicators and surviving Marleyans eyed Eren's skeletal remains in wonder. The steam and heat coming off his giant-ass corpse had skeletonized it. All that remained was his original head. The jellyworm died and began to evaporate. Kara walked over to an exhausted normal-sized Gim. "You better not have lost your powers just now or you're worthless to me."

"Still got them," Gim assured her as he increased in size and went back to normal.

"Go see your mother," Kara told him.

Gim gave Eren's head one last look and then embraced his mother who had been watching the whole fight. "I'm a Vindicator now," he told his mother.

"I'm glad," she said tearfully.

Kara then went over to Brainiac 5. "Do as you wish to it," she said, handing him the head. She then saw the ghost image of a blond teenager, the first Colossus. "I think your love was nothing but a long nightmare. You need therapy. The lives taken will never come back. Still, I got my recruit because of you...so thanks for that," Kara told her.

The teenage girl closed her eyes and smiled, the first expression of gratitude she had received in a very long time. "Rest in peace," Kara said to her as she faded away.


On Paradise Island, the Eldians did not repent German-style of what Eren had done. Instead, they denied all atrocities, beefed up their military, and allied with a powerful former enemy to escape any repercussions while also keeping their monarchy Japanese-style. Kara shook hands with Eldian Queen, Historia, who was supposedly guiltless of the conflict, and promised the Eldians protection from any reprisals. The surviving Marleyans were understandably pissed but got the shaft due to their "communist" affiliations.

Kara eyed the military parades, statues of Eren, and fascist-type speeches made by the Eldian government. "I find myself a little uncomfortable with all this," Kara admitted.

"By placing this world under the protection and supervision of the Galactic Federation, you have broken the cycle of violence. In time, peace will dissolve Eldian militancy in favor of game shows, panties in vending machines, square watermelons, cuddle cafes, a jack-of-all-trades toilet, noodle baths, cheese Kit-Kat bars, baby-crying contests, crooked teeth, rabbit islands, cute stuffed animals, furry cosplaying, anime, and an abundance of tentacle porn," Brainiac 5 predicted.

"Almost makes me want to keep the fascism," Kara said stunned.

"Almost," Brainiac 5 agreed.

"Alright, you know the drill. When Nura wakes up, stop Gim from attacking the walls, kill all the Eldian Colossuses roaming around, assassinate Eren, find Historia and put her on the throne, and make all of this as it should," Kara ordered.

"Of course," Brainiac 5 replied.

"And have Gim come to Earth for Vindicator training," Kara added.

"He will be stationed in Antarctica," Brainiac 5 said.

"Good deal. Now, if I ever get into my head to commit mass genocide on the galaxy to make the Vindicators look like heroes when they stop me, you are to stop me before the genocide, alright," Kara ordered.

"With Nura at my side, you will be killed before the thought even enters your mind," Brainiac 5 assured her.


Author's Notes: I tried to condense and explain the Attack on Titan situation as competently as my talent allowed me to. There's really no connection between Gim Allon and AOT other than they grow to giant sizes. Philosophers will debate AOT endlessly on the moral/political messages. The anime version has an end-credit cop-out. AOS has always had the simplistic message that the cycle of violence ends when you assassinate/kill all the bad guys and keep killing bad guys until there are none as opposed to complete pacifism or planetary genocide. To be clear, this entire episode is a dream from Nura and never happened. This is hinted here and there but I wanted everyone to be sure of that. It follows the occasional AOS pointlessness to everything.