Wings flapped on either side of Emma's ears. Powerful dragon wings. Big black wings that belonged to someone who she'd once slept cozy next to on a couch, bonding internally.
Emma almost couldn't believe this was real. On the other hand…Isaac had written this drivel, so she kinda knew it wasn't real in the "real" world. In our world. It only existed in the story he wrote.
And yet, for Emma, it was as real as her hair was. For one: she couldn't will those claws off her. She'd attempted to struggle out of them and failed miserably. Lily was indeed strong enough to hold her there—she wasn't as strong as paper. She had a steel grip.
Neal had taught her how to pick locks—not how to wrestle a boa constrictor.
She mused internally that he must not have been to Mexico.
For two: she was hardly about to wake up and be ejected from this reality. She could "not believe" all she damn well pleased. It wouldn't change a thing.
The wind roared in her ears as she called, "Lily, put me down!" as if the dragon was going to listen to her. She rolled her eyes to herself.
Her shoulder was cramping from the position she was in. Stuck in the tight cage with Lily clutching her round the middle with one foot and on the shoulder with the other.
That's what she got for craving apple-glazed veal. A cage that was as thin as a costume.
She'd been in this predicament for at least two hours. The length of time had passed incredibly slowly due to her awkward position, but as she'd gotten used to it, time had resumed its normal pace.
She knew it was almost crazy, but a part of her wished one of the pedestrians below would aim an arrow up at Lily. Not something that would kill her. Something that would hit her long enough to make her drop Emma.
And then what? Emma wondered darkly. Dead Savior on Aisle Fifteen? Who's going to clean that up—this so-called Ogre Slayer?
Who the ruddy hell is this Ogre Slayer? Blackbeard?
Well, Isaac has quite the sense of humor, she deduced. It could be Gaston.
Did Isaac just make me think—ugh, get out of my head, you jack—
A loud horn broke Emma from her thoughts. Lily lost her grip. Emma's cage dropped out of her claws. Swooping down, Lily caught Emma by the scruff of her neck. In her mouth.
If Emma thought the other position was uncomfortable, it was like lazing in a large, comfortable chair next to this atrocity. It took all her willpower not to howl with discomfort. She had to clamp her jaw shut—but clamp it she did. Her dignity would not run amok.
Then she saw it.
A hairy, gargantuan man shape with close-set eyes. He had a lot of hair on his neck and over his mouth but very little on his head. Most of what was on his head was peach fuzz.
The angle in which Lily was carrying her caused Emma to kick the thing smack-dab in the eye.
Goo oozed on her foot. "Yeck!" she slid her shoe off and kicked it far away. It hit another one of the creatures where his tooth would have been if he had one in that gap. The thing attacked her shoe with his tongue, causing it to bounce up, hit him in the nose, then vanish somewhere.
Emma wondered if it was now in Mexico and out of Isaac's book.
Nope. One of the other monsters was using it as a soccer ball. He hit Lily in the side of her dragon head with it. She growled with her teeth still clamped at the scruff of Emma's neck.
Emma felt her skin begin to tear. Her lips drew downward. She closed her eyes, cursing Isaac under her breath then wondered if that meant he had an intense crush on her. She had to fight a mocking smile. Aloud, she muttered, "Next time, pull my pigtail."
Then she thought, Nah, he likes women like Cruella. He likes damsels in distress, trapped by their mamas. I'm a loose cannon orphan with no walls to bind me. He'd as soon fall for Dodger in Oliver & Company as want to make out with the likes of me.
For Isaac's benefit, she stuck her tongue between her teeth and thought, Thank goodness. I was seriously worried about Isaac's mental health for a moment…
All her goofy thoughts were to keep her from panicking over what she knew was happening, but before her neck could fully rip free, Lily reached her foot up and grabbed Emma.
Emma opened her eyes and saw some men rushing the ogres, who she now realized were trying to kill some people in the center of a town. There was a boy with his leg missing, a man with his midriff bent at an angle that didn't look possible, and a woman who'd been trampled to death by the beasts.
The men rushing the ogres got plucked up and tossed aside like toys. One landed in a tree. Another barreled into a bridge and was killed instantly when his head slammed against it. A third's spine was broken by train tracks. The fourth had his fall broken by a gargantuan mushroom; he landed softly and was apparently unscathed. His lips drew downward as he glimpsed the damage done to his friends.
"The Ogre Slayer is coming!" someone in town called excitedly. "He's coming to save us all!"
Emma headbutted Lily's lower stomach to slow her down. She wanted to see who it was.
A knight in shining armor riding astride a white horse came galloping underfoot. He aimed a beam at each of the ogres, vanishing them.
When he whipped off his helmet, Emma let out a gasp. Yep, Isaac had a sense of humor alright.
"Rumple," she breathed, wrinkling her nose. "The scoundrel who tried to kill me? An ogre slayer? The ultimate good—a fairy in this work of fiction? ISAAC!" she bellowed into the roar of wind. "COME OUT AND FACE ME LIKE A MAN! WE NEED TO SETTLE THIS ONCE AND FOR ALL."
But of course Isaac ignored her.
Glowering, she thought to herself he certainly wouldn't be ignoring her if he thought he could actually beat her up. He might have the power to use words like callous bits of fist, but he couldn't use fists like fists.
Submitting to the ride, Emma thought Lily's dragon form could almost be a roller coaster. One extremely uncomfortable one, granted, with awful seats in dire need of being replaced. Regardless, all the dips and spins and wheelies high in the air were giving Emma a nearly-exhilarating head rush when she stopped thinking about her aching shoulder.
Five hours after the wretched journey began, Lily began to lower Emma. There was a large body of water surrounding an island. Lily got so close to the beautiful blue water that Emma was drenched up to her waist. The water was as warm as a Jacuzzi, so Emma didn't protest, even in her head. It felt rejuvenating and made her aware of how parched her throat was.
But she was far from pleased when Lily swept up to a prison castle and threw Emma at a high, open window. Emma hadn't been expecting this and was thrust straight into a wall on the other side. She landed with her feet in the air, most of her weight on her bent neck.
She discovered the only door in the room was locked. Upon peering down the open window, she discovered the ground was at least a hundred miles below—and there was nothing for her to grab on to to ease her fall. If she dropped down, she would die.
On the bright side, there was a magic canister into which she could tell what she wanted to eat, and it provided the food she asked for. In the center of the room was a magic well, which she discovered calling down and asking for Dr. Pepper actually gave her Dr. Pepper. Not very medieval of Isaac, but a nice touch nevertheless.
There was a decent chamber for going to the bathroom which smelled of freshly cut roses and limes.
Her only real complaint, aside from being a prisoner, was the garments. All the room had were ghastly ballgowns she'd rather not be caught dead in.
Unfortunately for her, it was that or being naked. So she tore off her wet clothes and put a ghastly ballgown on…
…praying Isaac the Idiot would not make Hook break the door down and catch her in this dress.
