CHAPTER 10.1: Welcome To Hexside

[Open on King, Sora, and Luz sitting on the couch]

King is flicking through channels on a crystal ball.

Blond Romance Lead: (on the crystal ball) I love you.

*static*

Villain: (on the crystal ball) There you are.

*static*

Principal Bump: (on the crystal ball) Oh, hi.

[Cut to the stream on the crystal ball, Bump in his office]

Static crosses the screen sporadically.

Principal Bump: I didn't see you there. I'm Principal Hieronymous Bump and welcome to Hexside School of Magic and Demonics, where our students' safety and well-being is our top priority.

Outside the window, several students fly on broomsticks away from giant tentacles. Mattholomule screams as he gets flung into the window.

Sora: Pfft.

Principal Bump: Let's take a tour.

[Star transition to a trophy shelf, Bump walking up to it]

Principal Bump: Here at Hexside, we are devoted to providing the very best for our students.

[Slide transition to the photo class classroom]

Principal Bump: From our state-of-the-art classrooms...

Principal Bump's torso flies off-screen in a shower of glitter. The spiders in the classroom all attack a screaming Mattholomule, who has a Healing patch on his face. Sora snickers.

Text reading Learning flies across the screen—spiral transition to the cafeteria.

Principal Bump: *holding a platter with a label that reads Healthy "Food"* ...to our award-winning cafeteria.

Mattholomule, now with an arm in a cast and sling, hesitantly takes the cover off the platter. It's normal food. The plant that Bo is eating across from him attacks his face, knocking him off the bench. She continues chewing, undisturbed.

Sora tries holding back his laughter.

Luz: *whispering* Sora, shh!

[A cafeteria worker slides past the screen, transitioning to the outside of Hexside]

Mattholomule screams as he lands on his face.

Sora/King: PFFT!

Principal Bump: Every student has the ability and support to reach their full potential here. Hexside, where the magic of friendship, is no longer taught here due to budget constraints.

*static*

[Play Kingdom Hearts - Oopsy-Daisy]

Sora and King, sliding off the couch, suddenly burst out laughing uncontrollably while rolling over the floor.

Luz: Sora, King, come on. Laughing at him getting hurt is not funny.

Sora continues laughing loudly as Eda walks in.

Eda: What's so funny?

Sora and King try to contain their laughter.

Sora: Eda! Th-that jerk f-from H-He-Hexside was getting *breathes* hurt... *laughs a bit* all over of the place in the commercial!

Sora and King laugh uncontrollably again while slamming his fist on the repeatedly. Luz shows a concerned look.

Eda: *smiling* Really?

Luz: Come on, Sora. You're better than that.

King: *trying to contain his laughter* Nonsense! Comedic pain on your enemies should always bring joy!

Luz: Ugh.

Sora and King continue to laugh.

[End Kingdom Hearts - Oopsy-Daisy]