Previously on TLA: Yusei's attempt to recreate the Duellist Network crippled the penthouse and left him with no way to hunt the Yliaster agent sent to kill Yugi.
Luckily, Joey had a plan.
Wait, why does that sound like bad news?
Desperation is a tricky bedfellow. Under the right circumstances, mortal enemies can join forces, lifelong friends can turn against one another, Joey Wheeler could be the lone voice of reason in an otherwise chaotic land. But a person would have to be truly desperate to rely upon a Wheeler plan.
"How about this one?" Holding up a leopard print bikini, Mai examined herself in front of a full-length mirror.
"Don't you already have that one?" Theirs was a relationship the polar opposite of three brothers at the distant end of the century. Mai was adventurous and outgoing, Serenity was the conservative voice of reason, and Téa worked a balancing act to keep them all happy.
"Ren," Mai was the empowering big sister everyone privately wished they had - even if she did push boundaries a bit far on occasion. "That's a cheetah print, this one's a leopard print. Completely different." One was yellow with caramel-black spots, one was golden with burnt sienna spots. Totally distinct.
"Didn't you buy a leopard print on that trip to New York?" As administrator to their little team, Téa had to justify and process the expense reports for every trip - a fact Joey and Tristan constantly forgot, to their own detriment.
"Oh." She looked at the outfit in disappointment. "How about this one?" Swapping them out for a royal purple number, she turned to the fourth musketeer. "Kondo, what do you think?"
Covered eyes flickered from their surveillance of the surrounding store to momentarily evaluate the threat posed by three pieces of skimpy fabric. In those hands, it was a lot. "That's outside my area of expertise."
"Of course it is." Even Téa rolled her eyes. "You came highly recommended but there are still a few areas you could improve."
"Ma'am." Polarised lenses to reduce glare, chunky combat boots to provide an all-terrain advantage. Coupled with a pair of cargo trousers and a jacket half a size smaller than was normal, and Kondo blended into the background of the rich and powerful like a concrete beam in a parking lot.
"Here," Pulling out another pair of outfits, Mai held them up for comparison with a teasing smile. "Which do you think your girlfriend would look better in? The green?" She held an emerald pair in front of her. "Or the red?" A ruby pair was laid over the first.
Serenity took one look at Kondo and made the decision for him. "Red."
Even with those glasses masking his face and years of training to repress any tells, she noticed the tiniest flicker of discomfort. "Respectfully," He said in the tone of someone who wasn't interested in employing respect right now. "I never mentioned a girlfriend."
"No?" Smiling teasingly, she leaned closer to peer up at his guarded features. It was unlike her to be this direct.
"How?" Kondo growled. Emotional leakage was a weakness that could pose a danger to his charges. Any avenue had to be locked down tight.
"Game face went up right away and your ears went as red as that two-piece." Using his peripherals, he cast a glance towards a mirror to check his reflection. Serenity was unsettling perceptive.
"Mai?"
"Mai." She agreed with a broad smile.
"Renny!" Holding up two postage stamps attached with a strand of silk, Mai was waving both hands for attention from scarcely ten feet away. "Try this one on for me!"
"I would but I'm busy sorting out Kondo's love life." Grabbing him by one muscular arm, she dragged the bodyguard between them with the same zeal as if Mai had a machine gun. "He's a big softie inside."
A pair of conspiratorially whispering teens on the cusp of being able to ask for an autograph turned and fled at the snarl on his face. "Don't worry," Rustling hangers, she held up another leopard print. "I think this should be in his size. Or close enough." Even the hanger managed to leer from behind the thong.
"My role as a bodyguard extends to my body as well." Years of experience had granted him the ability to detect a knife, calculate the angle of attack, and disarm the attacker inside the same second. Nobody had ever taught him how to combat a beautiful woman holding swimwear.
"Oh, you!" Smacking his arm with a charming smile on the way past, she made sure to display the addition to her basket.
"Go with it." Téa sighed diplomatically as she followed helplessly in the wake. "She's half the reason you get hazard pay." And private psychological support.
"Now then," The socialite made three men collateral damage as her smile distracted them from the clothes rack standing in their way. "How about shoes?"
In the private interior of his mind, their guardian began screaming as his consciousness instinctively dwindled into a faint speck in the corner.
As a trained guard, Kondo knew the danger of being laden down and outright refused to carry the shopping of three women on a spending spree.
As a formidable force of will, Téa bargained him down to a bag of clothes in each hand that he could drop if the need arose.
As a reminder of his little sister, Serenity had struggled for exactly two steps before he'd offered to help by carrying half her bags.
As a savvy manipulator of the feeble male psyche, Mai pouted until she too was alleviated of the burdens of her own actions.
And then they were right in the middle of the exact situation he had been trying to avoid as Kondo followed the three women down the street.
"How about this?" Smoothing down a handful of tasteful sequins, Mai did a spin down the pavement. "Isn't it darling?"
"Lovely." Serenity murmured. Unlike her more boisterous role model, she had restrained herself to wearing a new cardigan and keeping the rest of the items nearly packed.
Peering into her own bags, Téa was amazed yet again that she already had a full closet of shoes yet Mai had still managed to find the one pair that she needed to complete her ensemble. "I suppose I can always move some of Yugi's stuff out the bottom drawers." He never wore those sweaters outside the dead of winter anyway. And there was no reason to tell him either.
"I'm sure he will be back soon enough." Kondo rumbled comfortingly. Nobody in the city knew where the King of Games had gone. Only one would even think to change the where to a when. Waiting outside as they entered a compact konbini, Kondo entertained himself with a rack of sunglasses that had to take up the room that the people filled with ease.
"Do you want anything?" Téa was able to lean out the front and still reach the shelves at the back without having to do a dancer stretch, the store was so tiny.
"I'm fine." He twisted the mirrored stand to check the glasses on the other sections. "No rush."
The three ladies exited with another bag to add to their entourage, filled with various snacks and drinks to pick from as they continued to trek down the street. "Miss Wheeler?" Kondo broke into the conversation unprompted as a bus pulled around a corner in front of the group.
"Yeah?" She was surprised by the interruption.
"Would you mind holding the bags for a minute?" He smiled gently until she took them.
"Need to tie a shoelace?" Mai chirruped as they rounded a corner.
"Something like that." He agreed while pausing by the wall.
Turning after them, the next person around the corner received a 'light' tap to the chest before Kondo pulled them forwards off-balance, kicked them behind one knee, and caught the falling figure in a chokehold that gravity did most of the work in making inescapable. "Who are you and why are you following us?"
Repeated sounds of snapping twigs drew his attention to the camera two steps behind the reporter currently turning an interesting shade of puce.
"Paparazzi." He snarled with the same level of venom as blasphemous 'devouts' held toward those they deemed 'sinners'. "Don't let me catch you following us again." It was perfectly clear what would happen as he made sure to drop the struggling (in two ways) reporter only after the threat had been made.
"Let me guess," Téa sighed as the lead photographer struggled to gain air. His camera strap had 'accidentally' caught as he fell and a red welt was already forming along his neck. "Freelancers with the promise of an intern role if you get a good picture?"
"... No." Yes.
"Industrial Illusions has already filed cases against every licensed photographer and outlet in Domino City for stalking." Not that it made the front pages. II didn't like to air their dirty laundry in public and newspapers weren't keen to show weakness. Pegasus having more money than a god meant he could keep it up until free media was deader than the dodo. "Here," Scribbling a name on the back of the convenience store receipt, she held it out in a peace offering. "Offer your photos to competing papers with half on deposit and then contact this number to sell the rights to Industrial Illusions for the full sum."
Cautiously taking the card, Mr Floor scurried backwards before stumbling upright. "Why should we trust you?"
"Because blood stains are a nightmare to get out." Kondo growled from a distance that only looked far away enough that they could make a break for it. In descending order, the fastest items on the street were; light, those curling fists, and then the shutters in the cameras.
"Because you can sell your photos to a newspaper and make yourself legally culpable or sell them to Industrial Illusions and then post them online to expand your portfolio." Téa overrode the bloodlust with a reasonable explanation. "Your choice." Kondo glared at the pair until they saw the wisdom of not choosing the option which would put them at odds with him.
A quick muttering of thanks as they slipped away and a few seconds glaring at the corner ended the situation without further incident. "For future reference," Téa glared at the new hire. "Don't attack people just because they have a camera." He grumbled noncommittally. "I'll pretend that's you agreeing."
"Hey," Clapping her hands, Mai instantly forced a cheerful atmosphere. "Who wants kombucha on the way? I know a great place around here." Two minutes ago, they'd been ambushed by invasive photographers and he'd almost sent them both to hospital and now the group was entirely preoccupied with what flavours they wanted to get. The mental tally of favours he owed added another tick in Mai's column as the procession resumed.
Kondo took a half-stride lead when they closed in on the Industrial Illusions building. Most kidnappings happened in an area familiar to the victim and a building as central as Industrial Illusions had too many security risks for him to be comfortable. As if sensing his first-day anxiety over the new role, reality had a wedding party thronging out down the street. Really, Kondo groaned internally, what else could go wrong?
By the time the three ladies were on final approach to the door, Kondo was already in place to open it, scan the foyer to evaluate any potential threats, hold it open for his charges to file through, and then follow behind to detract from any tailgaters. It was done so smoothly that nobody even blinked. Even when getting into the elevator, the bodyguard did a cursory inspection of the interior before standing guard outside as his charges filed in and Téa used her key card to unlock the penthouse button. Though it wasn't technically safe until they were actually within the penthouse, the trio breathed a slight sigh of relief at being home. Beside them, the guard did nothing save opening the doors to lead them through.
Lounging around the living area were Joey and Tristan, Duke having to attend a conference call with his business team and Rebecca still embroiled in the library. "How was it?" With an arm slung over the back of the sofa and the television on subtitles, Joey made an effort to make it look like he was paying attention.
"Judging by the amount of bags," And the PTSD shudders from their escort. "A successful trip." Tristan gently accepted both of Serenity's bags and gave her a careful kiss on the cheek, immediately noticing the slight discomfort. "Did something happen?"
"Photo vultures." Mai explained as she pulled off her jacket. "Mr Kondo here took care of them quite nicely."
Tristan evaluated the stoic guardian and how likely it was the word 'nice' had been misappropriated. "Bonus for you." He tossed across a packet of face wipes. While Serenity was far from weak, she could be too nice for her own good and inevitably struggled with the 'just trying to put food on the table' argument from behind a pushy lens. "Thanks for doing this for us." Not taking the ladies shopping, for sparing him and Joey the nightmare.
Sliding a wipe down his face slowly erased Kondo to reveal the Fudo lurking beneath. "Thanks for the outfit." Tugging the hairband out, Yusei ruffled his hair back to the usual mess. Even just removing the glasses concealer had utterly transformed his appearance. "Can I ask why you had an alias on standby? Or is it classified?"
"Nah, it's alright." Tristan shrugged. "Legacy of a misspent youth." Pre-millennium Japan didn't have the most reliable arrest process when it came to a few rebellious youths doing petty crimes and this had resulted in Tristan having a fake ID with a real rap sheet.
"Merely the first part in my genius plan." Astonishingly, Joey's plan really was as brilliant as it was simple, and its architect was nothing if not 'uncomplicated'. Hunting one person in the millions of Domino City was nearly impossible. Yusei had tried recreating a dozen years' worth of work in less than a week (a disturbingly commonplace occurrence when he could convince Din to work with others) to track down any sign of card being used that didn't belong in that era, only to overload the network in the penthouse and trip the electrical grid for the entire building. Since the city had yet to undergo the dystopian nightmare of Sector Security indexing every citizen's face, it wasn't even as if they could pressure the police to simply scour everyone in a ten-block radius to see who had no recorded history.
No, finding the person intending to kill Yugi Mutou was so close to impossible that the group was disturbingly unable to think of a better solution than Joey's idea of dangling Yusei out like so much live bait. Of course, the man who had seen 'The Terminator' nearly twice as many times as he had 'Back to the Future' knew that history was indescribably delicate such that they couldn't just put out an advert in the local paper as Tristan had suggested. What they needed was to showcase Yusei to the world in as much breadth as possible without letting anyone actually notice him. Unfortunately, that's where his moment of genius ran out. Probably because Mai had yawned dramatically at the overenthusiasm and distracted his limited intellect with the subtle movements of stretching.
Seeing the distraction in action had spurned inspiration in the rest of the group. Everyone wanted to see the rich, famous, and beautiful but nobody ever focused on the faces in the background. Throw in a pair of glasses, a little makeup, and ninety years of distance would blur any chance of Joey's plan being discovered in the future. Anyone looking to hunt Yugi Mutou, however, would notice a vaguely familiar face taking a step more caution than most bodyguards.
"And what was the second part of this 'genius plan' of yours?" Mai Valentine loved Joey Wheeler for his endless support, resolutely optimistic nature, underdog talent, and his willingness to see beyond the occasional shallow manipulation. One aspect she merely accepted was his mediocre intellect. As soon as the conversation turned beyond Duelling, he turned from savant into struggling.
"I can't tell you." Stretching upside-down over the sofa, he gave her an inverted smile. "What if you use it against me?"
"Honey, do you really think I need a genius plan to use against you?" She kissed a finger and pressed it against his forehead with a wry smile. "Don't worry, I'll take you with me on the next shopping trip. Isn't step one of your genius plan to dangle the pretty boy out as much as possible?"
Joey looked for Yusei to both plead for help and glare him off the flirtation list but the once and future King of Games had run to hide at the mention of more shopping.
As always, this is where I shop for reviews.