The Detective and the Tech Guy

Authors: Steampunk . Chuckster & dettiot

Rating: T

Summary: A case of mistaken identity and murder brings Sarah Walker, Pinkerton agent, to sunny California. Protecting the heir to the Bartowski Electronics Corporation should be just business - but Chuck Bartowski fills out a suit nicely and makes a mean martini. Chuck lobbied to hire the Pinkerton Agency, but had no idea the detective they'd send would be as alluring, intelligent and fascinating as Sarah Walker. Will the detective and the tech guy solve the mystery, distracted by the riddle in their own hearts? An homage to The Thin Man movies co-written by Steampunk . Chuckster and dettiot.

Disclaimer: We don't own Chuck or The Thin Man series. And we're making no monetary profit from this story.

Author's Note: This bit of goodness is brought to you by dettiot's pen! Or...laptop. Fingers. Keys. I dunno. Technology, man... - SC

XOXOXOXOXO

Morgan Grimes had been best friends with Charles Irving Bartowski, of the Burbank Bartowskis, since they were five years old. And even with all the changes that had happened in both of their lives, Chuck wasn't that different from his five-year-old self. Well, taller-he was definitely taller. And his father's company hitting it big and Chuck having tons of money had changed things, like turning Chuck's house into the place they hung out because Chuck had every video game ever made. Still, Chuck was the same guy: friendly, happy-go-lucky, the best and most loyal friend a guy could have.

But that also meant that Chuck Bartowski as an adult was just like Chuck as a child. And kid Chuck did not react well when he got his heart broken. There was moping, self-pity, playing Goldeneye until you were pretty sure he was getting bedsores, the works. And Chuck had always stuck to those same patterns every time a girl dumped him or turned him down. It didn't happen often, but when it did, it was baaaaaad.

So Morgan was very, very worried about how Chuck had been acting since Morgan had returned to L.A. from his training in Hawaii. Ellie was so worried about her brother that she had resorted to calling Morgan and asking him to help snap Chuck out of his funk. When he had arrived, he knew that Ellie had been right to call him. Because Chuck definitely needed his help.

An omelet and a long talk later, Chuck had seemed in better spirits. He seemed resolved and prepared to deal with his feelings for this Sarah person, who frankly sounded way too good to be true in Morgan's book. It was like she was a hotter Vicki Vale and that just wasn't possible. Not that Chuck didn't deserve a super-hot girlfriend who loved the pants off him, but those kind of women, with beauty and brains and heart, they just didn't exist.

Ever since then, though, Morgan had been confused by Chuck's actions. Chuck had done a bunch of traveling for his dad, and at Christmas he seemed really happy and was always on his phone. But then, gradually, Chuck started getting depressed again, only for things to change in late February: going back to texting all the time with a dopey grin on his face, running away for a long weekend by himself when Morgan had invited him to Vegas, and even going to the gym!

Add in last weekend's "business" trip that Mr. Bartowski knew nothing about, and it was clear: Chuck was dating someone. Someone who wasn't Sarah, someone he didn't want to tell Morgan about. And whoever it was, Chuck was rebounding hard with this woman.

That was why Morgan was so worried. Chuck wasn't a rebound guy; he had to go through his mourning period when things didn't work out with someone. There had been no mourning period for Sarah and since Chuck hadn't said a peep to his best friend about this new girlfriend . . . it didn't look good.

Clearly, this new woman needed to be vetted. Chuck deserved the best, and it was up to Morgan to make sure he got it. But how could he test this woman when he knew nothing about her?

The universe seemingly understood his dilemma, because it presented Morgan with the perfect opportunity for this problem.

One lazy Saturday, Morgan dropped in at Chuck's place. They had plans to do lunch and Morgan showed up a little early-trying to maximize the time he spent with his best friend so he could make Operation Help Chuck happen. Chuck wasn't around, so Morgan just let himself in and got comfortable until his best friend returned to his ultra-sweet pad from a run.

"Morgan, I'm gonna shower before lunch," Chuck said, wiping the sweat from his brow

"Okay, buddy," Morgan said from his spot on the couch, acting like the video game he was playing had his full and complete attention. But it didn't, because Morgan had noticed that Chuck had left his cell phone on the kitchen counter before he went upstairs.

This was what he needed! Morgan scampered into the kitchen and picked up Chuck's fancy smartphone. Being his best friend, Morgan knew exactly what password Chuck used, and it took him a second to unlock the phone and start scrolling through Chuck's texts.

Normally, Morgan wouldn't stoop to such an invasion of Chuck's privacy. But desperate times called for desperate measures. And whoa, Chuck had a lot of texts with a contact identified as VV.

A lot of flirty texts.

This must be the mystery woman! If the texts alone weren't enough, Chuck's use of VV for her contact-clearly short for Vicki Vale-was enough to tell Morgan that Chuck was dating someone. Someone he really wanted to keep secret.

But what should he do now? Morgan sat down at the counter, holding Chuck's phone. It wasn't enough to know that Chuck was dating again; he wanted to make sure this woman was right for Chuck. But how to do that?

Then Morgan got an idea. An idea that was sheer genius. Sexting!

Clearly Chuck had some kind of long-distance thing going on with this woman. Maybe he had met her with all that traveling before Christmas? If they were apart a lot, sexting was just what a relationship needed to keep the spark going. And if he, posing as Chuck, sent some sexts to this woman, Morgan would be able to find out just what kind of woman she was.

Grinning to himself, Morgan's thumbs began flying over the phone's keyboard as he composed a string of sexy, suggestive messages. When he heard Chuck moving around in his bedroom, Morgan finished the last sext and deleted the sent messages-a move he thought was very spy-like. Then he left Chuck's phone on the kitchen counter and hurried back over to his video game.

He couldn't wait to see what would happen with Chuck and his mystery woman. But if this woman was right for Chuck, Morgan would never know the outcome.

XXX

As soon as Sarah was back in her office after a round of emergency Saturday meetings, she turned her phone on to see if Chuck had texted her back. They were hoping to meet up somewhere next month, and she had thrown out the idea of Mexico for sun, sand and sex. Not that she had put it in those terms exactly, but the meaning had certainly come through, she thought with a grin.

When Chuck had visited her last weekend, they had decided that as long as their jobs didn't get in the way, they would meet up at least every six weeks. Any longer than that and both of them felt each other's absence too much. It wasn't long after she had seen him off at O'Hare that she was ready to see him again, either.

Her phone finally powered back up-the next time she saw Chuck, she was definitely going to get over her reservations and ask him to help her pick out a fancy new phone-and she smiled when she saw several texts from Chuck. She loved how excited he was whenever he talked to her; he could never keep himself to one short, simple text. No, he would have to send her three in order to say what a great idea that was and he was so ready for that plan and he couldn't wait to see her.

The first two texts were just that: Chuck giving a thumbs-up to Mexico and saying he would call her tonight. But then . . . what the hell?

Sarah felt her cheeks go red as she read through his next messages. These were much more explicit than Chuck usually was. It wasn't that he was a prude or anything, but Chuck was definitely a bit more reserved when it came to the physical side of their relationship. At least, he was reserved in talking about it. He didn't get turned on by sexy talk or detailed descriptions of sexual acts. No, the times when he had been most aroused were when they had been flirting with each other, using veiled references and heated gazes to get their point across.

Not to mention they had both agreed to be somewhat circumspect when it came to text messages and emails, especially anything that was sent during work hours. Because she knew Pinkerton wasn't above running surveillance on their employees, and it would be easy for the agency to monitor the web traffic and the cell signals to see what kinds of messages she was exchanging with a former client.

Also, it wasn't fair to feel turned on when she was at work.

Frowning a little, Sarah read through the messages again. Something wasn't right about these texts, though. They just didn't sound like Chuck. Not only because he was sending her sexy messages, period, but the phrases, the things he described . . .

A knock on her door made Sarah shut her phone and shove it in her desk drawer as she looked up. "Shaw," she said, trying to keep the disgust out of her voice.

Lately, Shaw had been going above and beyond his normal minor annoyance status and had become an out-and-out pain in her ass. He second-guessed her, made not-so-subtle digs at her minor mistakes, and had even attempted to get her pulled from an assignment that was perfect for her in favor of one of his buddies.

Nothing seemed to change Shaw's attitude towards her, no matter what she did. Even a private meeting with him had yielded no change, which was especially frustrating considering when the meeting had happened: during Chuck's visit. Wasting an hour with the block of wood that was Daniel Shaw, when she had Chuck waiting for her in her apartment, was galling.

At her wit's end, Sarah had asked Chuck for his thoughts when she had returned to her place and spent forty-five minutes venting about all the ways Shaw drove her crazy. "Ignore him," Chuck had suggested. "Just keep doing your amazing-as-usual work and let him look like a jerk and an idiot, for saying you're not the best detective Pinkerton has."

The compliment was nice, but even better was the advice. Because while it hadn't gotten Shaw to ease up on her, at least his attitude bothered her less. In the last week, she had been able to rise above his jibes as she prepared for her next assignment.

"Detective Walker," Shaw said woodenly. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Not at all," Sarah said breezily. "What can I do for you?"

"You have the Landis file? I need it." Shaw paused, then added, "Please," as if he had suddenly remembered he was a human being and not a robot and therefore should show some kind of courtesy to his coworkers.

"Of course," Sarah said, if only to get him out of her office so she could leave for the day. Opening her file drawer, she removed the file and handed it over to Shaw. "Have a good weekend," she said, closing the drawer and beginning to gather her things.

Shaw nodded and turned on his heel, leaving her office without another word. He was probably going to his own office to spend the rest of the day doing more work. Sarah was all for getting ahead, but Shaw's workaholic tendencies were too much. It made her glad that Chuck had come into her life.

Smiling softly to herself at the thought of Chuck, Sarah slid her phone into the pocket of her coat and stood up, pushing aside her vague misgivings about his earlier texts. Yes, they were a bit strange, and she was definitely going to talk to him about springing something like that on her, but it was quite flattering to know he was thinking about her like that. Not that she didn't know he wasn't already, but to see it in black and white, all spelled out . . . she had to admit, she liked it.

And she was definitely going to let him know just how much she liked it, in full detail, tonight during their phone call.

XXX

Checking his watch, Chuck hoped that it wasn't too late for Sarah. His afternoon of comic book shopping and dinner with Morgan had gone longer than he thought it would, and now it was past ten in Chicago. He could only hope that she hadn't spent too much of the day at work, that she got to enjoy herself a little before she headed off to her next job.

But before she left, they could talk about Mexico and their next visit together, something that Chuck was very excited for. Because who wouldn't be excited at the thought of Sarah Walker in a bikini?

He grabbed a bottle of water and headed over to the couch, flopping down as he waited for his call to connect. There was nothing like this moment, when the anticipation and excitement was building to a crescendo and-

Well, there was something a bit like it, but he'd need Sarah to be here to make that happen, Chuck thought with a half-grin, half-smirk.

"Hello?"

The sound of Sarah's voice made his smirk become just a plain old smile. "Hello, Detective Walker," he said, toeing off his sneakers and settling in for the best part of his day.

They spent the next half-hour talking about Mexico, the idiot coworker that didn't see her value because of being an idiot, and his day with Morgan. Chuck was just thinking it was probably about the time they should start wrapping up the call when Sarah said, "Chuck?"

There was a hesitation in her voice that made him sit up a little on the couch. "Yeah?"

"Umm . . . I have to ask about the texts you sent me today."

Chuck frowned. "What about them?" He racked his brain, trying to remember exactly what he had said. All he could remember sending were two this morning about their next trip and then a quick one while Morgan was in the bathroom at dinner.

"It-I didn't expect to get them from you, with how you are, and believe me, I'm all in favor of them, but I would have thought that, you know, if you were going to send me sexy texts you would have-"

"What?!" Chuck yelped, jumping to his feet.

"This afternoon, you sent me a bunch of texts that were all 'what are you wearing?' and 'bet you're looking sexy today' and like I said, I don't mind, but we talked about keeping our written communication a bit circumspect in case Pinkerton can get access to my texts," Sarah said, sounding both worried and amused.

Since he was on his feet, Chuck started pacing. "Sarah . . . I didn't send you any sexts."

He could hear her suck in a breath. "What?" she said, the worry in her voice amping up.

"Gimme a second," he said before pulling his phone from his ear and bringing up his text messages. A look at his sent folder confirmed that there was only the texts he sent. But for some reason, he thought to look at the deleted texts, and there they were: six sexually explicit texts sent to Sarah's number.

"Somebody got my phone and sent those texts to you, Sarah," Chuck said.

"Chuck, I'm not mad. If you sent them-"

Running a hand through his hair, Chuck interrupted her to explain. "No, someone took my phone and sent you those texts, then tried to hide it by deleting them. But I don't know who-wait."

Sarah was saying his name, but Chuck was too focused on the pieces falling into place. Like Morgan's increasing nosiness about Chuck's love life and how he left Morgan alone today while he was showering and teaching Morgan how to delete old texts when he was running out of storage space on his phone.

"I'm going to filet him with his own sushi knives," Chuck said, holding his phone tightly.

"What? Chuck, what is it?" The shock in Sarah's voice seemed to be drowning out the worry at the moment.

"It was Morgan," Chuck said, feeling embarrassed and upset and mad and a hundred other emotions. "Morgan showed up before I showered and I left my phone down here. He must have . . . he must have thought he was helping."

Chuck could only imagine what Sarah was thinking right now. He knew how bad this looked and he knew that Morgan's actions not only reflected poorly on him, but they made Chuck look bad, too, for having Morgan as a best friend.

"Just how would he be helping?" Sarah asked in confusion.

"You know how I told Morgan about how hung up I was on you, right? So he knew I had it bad for you but he doesn't know we're together now since we agreed that no one would know about us, so Morgan must be really confused about how I've been acting and-I don't know." Chuck kept pacing as he worked out his thoughts, trying to come up with a way to make Morgan's acts seem less creepy-or at least coming from a good place, even if they ended somewhere very disturbing. "I guess he wanted to figure out who I was dating, since it's pretty clear to someone like Morgan that I'm dating."

"But why text me?" Sarah asked. "Why not just talk to you about it?"

With a shrug of his shoulders, Chuck went into the kitchen and got himself a beer. This conversation definitely called for something stronger than water. "I haven't told Morgan that I'm dating anyone. He must be upset with me. And really, really worried about me holding back."

There was silence as Chuck twisted off the cap on his beer and took a long swallow. Then, Sarah asked slowly, "Is Morgan the type to get involved in your love life? To pass judgement on the girl?"

"Oh, yeah. You should hear what he did when he found out I liked Megan Bledsoe in high school," Chuck said. "He wrote notes to her and signed my name to them, all because he had a crush on Megan's best friend and thought if I was dating Megan, it would help him with her friend. It all backfired, though-got me a Slushie down my shirt and left both of us dateless."

"Awwww," Sarah said, a touch distractedly. "Wait-I bet he did it the same kind of thing to me," Sarah said, her words coming faster. "Because if you say anything to him, it'd confirm what Morgan already suspects: you're seeing someone, someone who would be surprised to get sexts from you, plus it'd get it out in the open that you haven't told him about her. But if you don't say anything, Morgan will think you're not dating anyone and there must be something else going on."

Chuck felt his eyes widen as Sarah's reasoning sunk in. "Wow. You really are the world's best detective, for figuring out Morgan Grimes like that."

She let out a soft huff of laughter, but he could hear how pleased she was when she spoke. "You think so?"

"It's totally the kind of Byzantine plot Morgan would come up with," Chuck said. "More complicated than it needs to be, with a dash of sex."

"Too bad he's not going to realize it didn't work," Sarah said. "And just so you know, when I meet Morgan, I'm not going to let this go."

"No, no, you are totally free to make Morgan pay for this. That is, if I leave anything for you," Chuck joked.

Sarah laughed again. "It's getting late, even for you, and I have to be a plane to Zurich tomorrow. I'll email you when I land."

He nodded, feeling the same pang of sadness he always felt when they had to end a conversation. "Make sure to have some chocolate while you're there. Swiss chocolate? So milky."

"Thank you for that piece of info," Sarah said primly. He could just imagine the smirk on her face as he laughed.

"Okay, okay, stating the obvious, I know." Chuck paused, wishing he could find a way to put into words how he felt about her. Wishing he was brave enough to just speak from his heart and confident enough that it wouldn't scare her. "Be careful," he said quietly, choosing to say something that reflected at least a little of his feelings for her.

"I will," Sarah said, her voice equally soft. "Talk to you soon."

Chuck said goodbye and hung up before taking a large swallow from his beer. It was getting harder and harder to say goodbye to Sarah. To say goodbye and know that he had no one to talk to about how crazy he was about his girlfriend.

By nature, Chuck was a talker. He could spend hours picking the perfect desert island sandwich with Morgan or swapping complaints with Ellie about their parents. Discussing his feelings was how he worked through any problems he had. So not being able to talk to Morgan, or Ellie, or his dad, or anyone, about Sarah . . . he felt lost.

At first, the secret romance had been fun. Exciting, even. It was like having all your Christmas shopping done by Thanksgiving and walking around with the secret pleasure of knowing what your friends and family would be receiving from you. But now the fun was wearing off. The relationship was getting serious-well, more serious. What worked at the beginning didn't feel like it was working now, in Chuck's opinion.

For his relationship with Sarah to be a secret, Chuck was having to lie to his best, oldest friend. He had never had to do that, at least not for so long. And keeping quiet about it was making Chuck feel tawdry and guilty and almost ashamed. Which was the last way he wanted to feel when it came to Sarah.

Blowing out a breath, Chuck finished his beer and put the bottle into the recycling bin. Sarah was so cautious about appearances and not wanting to give the impression that they had gotten together while she was working for his father. And they had only been dating for four months now. Maybe in another month or two, he could ask her about the endgame to their secret relationship. He understood Sarah's concerns, but he didn't want to keep his girlfriend secret forever.

Because he was already pretty sure that someday, he wanted Sarah to be more than his girlfriend.

XOXOXOXOXO

Author's Note: Next step, Chuck? Ice dancing partners! Just kidding. It's probably exactly what you're all thinking. Thanks for reading! Review! I'll be super happy about it, I promise! Ta! - SC