Lincoln woke up looking at the wheat tan ceiling. He stretched and yawned, taking in his surroundings. He contently looked at the door, his desk, the calendar-
His tranquility was shattered when he saw the calendar. April First, or for them, April Fools day. Lincoln yelled and scrambled out of bed. He ripped off his night clothes and threw them on the bed. He quickly shoved on his jeans, an undershirt and his orange polo and looked around for what to save from Luan's incoming pranking spree.
He quickly decided on bringing Bun-Bun and a handful of his more prized comics. He threw open his drawers and crammed the best of his Ace Savvy and David Steele issues in the crook of his left and arm and snatched Bun-Bun off the bed with the other.
He ran out into the hallway and saw his sisters in a similar state of panic. He saw Lynn sprint down the stairs carrying her lucky jersey, identical to the one she was wearing but slightly smudged, followed closely by Lucy who was holding her poem book to her chest. He rushed down the stairs and swung around into the dining room using the banister ball.
He finally made it into the backyard where the rest of his family sans Luan where. They were all crowded around Lisa who was punching in the passcode to the bunker.
"Hurry up Lisa," Dad was fretting, looking back at the house.
"No worries father," Lisa said as the hatch slowly flipped up. It had fully opened as the window of Luan's room slid up and Luan looked down at her assembled family.
"Morning guys! Isn't it a great day for funny side up eggs?" She laughed at her pun.
"Beauty before age!" Lola shrieked as she pushed her way to the hatch and jumped down into the bunker. The rest followed suit with Lincoln being the last to go down. Threw down his comics and Bun-Bun before climbing onto the ladder. He pulled the hatch shut and turned the gear as hard as he could before climbing further down.
He stepped off the ladder and onto the concrete floor, which was littered with his fallen comics. He picked them up and smoothed them out one by one before picking up Bun-Bun. He sat down on one of the crates and set his stuff to the side.
"In approximately 16 hours, thirty nine minutes and twenty one seconds April Fools day will be over and we can emerge," Lisa said aloud to no one in particular. She walked over to a charcoal colored door outlined with riveted steel. She opened the door and peered inside.
"Todd, I need you and the others to vacate this room for the rest of the day," she said.
"Oh, but of course," Todd's stopping, mechanical voice said. "We'll just stand in a corner for the rest of the day."
Todd wheeled out of the room, followed by Mr. Reinforced Titanium Alloy Arms and Friendbot 1000. As they moved over to the corner Mom pointed at Mr. Reinforced Titanium Alloy Arms and asked, "Is that our mailbox?"
"That is not important," Lisa said. "We now have much more room to wait in."
Lincoln and a few of his other sisters peered through the doorway. Inside was a near replica of the living room with a dark yellow rug in the middle, an olive green couch, a plush orange chair, a nightstand with lamp and books, a grandfather clock and a dog house. On the back wall was a portrait of Lisa and for some reason pink drapes as if covering up a window. To the far side of the room was Lisa's works on rocket science.
"Dibs on the dog house!" Lana said, running over to it and crawling in. The rest of the family walked inside and checked out the room. Leni walked over to the window drapes and pushed them aside and looked disappointed when she found there was only a concrete wall behind it.
Mom and Dad, with Mom holding Lily, sat down on the couch. "Well, what now?"
"I have a plethora of board games and other activities to stimulate our minds and dispel boredom," Lisa began, gesturing out to the other room. "I have also stockpiled large quantities of non-perishables for situations such as this."
"Good, because I'm starving," Lynn butted in. "Where's the grub at?"
"The crate next to the door," Lisa answered. Lynn went over to the box and removed the top of it. She pulled out a tin can and a metal spoon before sitting down on the bench. Lincoln walked over to the crate and peered into it. Inside was row upon row of canned steak and beans, with a few other items spaced in between.
He chose a package of dried apple slices. He sat back down on the crate where he had left his stuff while the rest of his sisters walked over to the box and began to pick what their breakfast would be, though only Lana took the steak and beans.
He tore open the package and began to place the slices in his mouth one by one as he read his comics. He had gotten half way through the issue when Lynn finished her 'breakfast' and said, "You still have that stuffed animal?"
Lincoln glanced down at Bun-Bun and then over to Lynn's jersey, which was handing off the ledge. "You still haven't washed that shirt?"
Lynn got all defensive and pulled the dirty jersey closer to herself. "Hey, I don't want any of the good luck to wash off of it."
"Well, I feel the same way about Bun-Bun. Having him around just makes me feel better." Lynn, seeming to understand where he was coming from, didn't bring up his stuffed animal again.
After they had all eaten something they gathered in the robots living room. There was a stack of board games to the side of the rug; a double deck of cards held together with a blue rubber band, Capitalism, Plumbing Pro, Pretty, Pretty Pageant Queen, the Ace Savvy trivia game and Settlers of Catland, to name a few.
Mom pulled out Faxstrations from the pile and handed Lily a dry erase marker and a sketchpad. Lily pulled out a card and looked at it confusedly, not knowing what it said. Mom looked at the card and whispered something into her ear. Lily perked up and began to scribble away as Mom flipped over the miniature hourglass.
"Smiley face!" Luna said.
"Stick figure!" Leni said.
"The sweet embrace of death," Lucy said in her deadpan voice. Luna and Lisa inched away from her. They kept yelling out answers until all the sand in the hourglass had reached the bottom. "Time!"
"What was it?" Lynn asked.
"Fishy!" Lily giggled, amused that no one had correctly guessed what she was drawing.
"Preposterous," Lisa lisped, seizing the pad and looking at it. "This in no way, shape or form resembles Actinopterygii."
"I know Lisa, but she did her best," Mom said as she took the pad from Lisa for her turn. Mom's drawing was that of a book, Leni a pair of sunglasses, Lola a tiara, Dad a cowbell, Lincoln a deck of cards, Lola a frog, Lucy a gravestone (She always seemed to pull the more morbid ones on her turn) and Luna a guitar.
Lisa's turn had been the most amusing. She grew more and more short tempered as each person had their turn, nit picking the drawings detail and complaining how they didn't look anything like the prompt. She had started her turn and Dad had kept repeating the same guess, "A jackal! Jackal! It's a jackal! It looks like a Jackal! Jackal? Jackal! It's a jackal! Jackal?"
"Time!" Mom had called out.
Lisa slammed her head on the table before raising it up to snap at Dad. "If it wasn't right the first time, why would it be right the next ten times!?" She flipped over the pad and stormed out into the other room as the rest of them stifled a laugh.
"Looks like someone's having a temper tantrum," Luna chuckled. They all laughed, no longer trying to restrain themselves. It was going to be a fun day.
It was only a fun morning. They had played through the rest of the board games and every card game they could think of. They had eaten lunch and were now lounging around the bunker.
Lucy was hanging upside down on one of the bunks like a sleeping bat, Luna was idly hitting the top of empty food cans like a drum and Lana had curled up asleep in the doghouse. Lincoln was making a house of cards while Lynn was rolling a football around with her feet.
"Does anyone think Luan actually pulled her punches with the pranks this year?" Lola asked.
"Why would you ask that?" Dad said.
"I'm feeling the most bored ever! No sunlight, almost no room and only board games to do."
The conversation had gathered the others' interest. "You want to go outside and check yourself?" Lynn asked.
"What? And get a pie to my immaculate face? Of course not!"
"I know how we settle this," Lana said. She brought her finger up to the tip of her nose. "Not it!"
Everyone else quickly followed suit, even Lucy who was still hanging upside down. Lincoln flung his arm up to his face, destroying his card house only to find it was in vain since everyone else had already done it.
"Dang it." He stood up and walked out of the room, passing Lucy who was walking back into the room. He placed his foot on the rung as the steel door to the living room shut behind him and he heard the click of the lock engaging. He sighed and began to climb up.
He got to the top and spun the wheel clockwise. The hatch lifted open and he braced for pie, but nothing came. He slowly stuck his head out, squinting from the bright sunlight. He looked around the yard and saw that there were no convoluted traps. He looked up at the oak tree and saw Luan wasn't in it.
He let out a sigh of relief. Maybe she was right. Maybe they could come out of the bunker early and spend the rest of the day inside their house.
Creak, creak
Lincoln heard the turning of wheels and spun around. He saw Lily's tricycle rolling towards with no perceptible means of propulsion, being ridden by Mr. Coconuts. It came to an abrupt stop about ten feet away from the bunker.
"Hey there Lincoln," It said in its high-pitched voice. "I want to play a game."
"Nope." Lincoln slammed the hatch shut again and sealed it before climbing back down. He knocked on the steel door.
"Who's there?" Lisa asked from the other side.
"It's Lincoln," he answered. "Still not safe to go out." The door unlocked and swung open, revealing the disappointed faces of his family that they couldn't emerge early.
"Don't worry, we're already more than halfway through the day. It's going to be fine."
Tink
Tink
Tink
Lincoln looked up at the dull gray ceiling listening to the noise with two pillows pushed against the side of his head. The noise had started one or two hours ago, not long after Lincoln had checked to see if it was safe to go outside. It sounded like a metal spoon tapping on the bunker hatch. It would ring out at random, in intervals of between five and thirty seconds.
The sofa had been stripped of its cushions so they could block out the noise and the door had been shut, but the banging still sounded deafening in the silence. Lola wasn't doing too good compared to the rest of them. She would flinch at each Tink and her eyes darted around the ceiling as if to see when the next blow would come.
Tink
Tink
Tink
Without warning she bolted for the door, threw it open and ran for the ladder.
"Stop!" Dad said.
"I can't take it anymore! Let Luan pie us to oblivion, just make that noise stop!"
She made it halfway up the ladder before Luna grabbed her by the ankle and pulled her back down and away from the hatch. Lola's arms became pink blurs as she tried to attack Luna to release her, but her gloves were on so she couldn't scratch her.
Luna, Lincoln, Lynn and Leni each had to grab one of her limbs to restrain her. Lola was practically foaming at the mouth, cursing each and everyone of them for not letting her escape the noise. Lisa, unperturbed by her outburst, calmly pulled out a syringe from one of the storage crates and walked over to Lola. She stuck the need into her neck and depressed the plunger.
Lola hissed and writhed. "Why you little…" she began to threaten before going limp.
"Lisa, what have we said about drugging your siblings?" Mom chided Lisa.
"I apologize mother, but it simply had to be done. I'm sure you could agree considering that she would've given Luan access to the inside of the bunker."
Mom sighed, seeing that Lisa had a good point. They tied up Lola's ankles and wrists with ropes and laid her on the couch and placed Lynn on guard duty to make sure she wouldn't try to escape again.
After they sat down to catch their breath from the close call they noticed the noise that drove them half to madness had ceased. Instead they heard what they thought was hysterical laughter, muffled by multiple feet of concrete, steel and earth.
Lincoln was feeling uneasy. He was eating another can of steak and beans for dinner. The noise from earlier had not come back and the bunker was still impenetrable. So why was he feeling off?
He ate another spoonful of his dinner. Lola had regained consciousness a little while ago. She was still restrained despite her promises she wouldn't snap again and Lynn had to feed her. So no, that wasn't it.
His eyes swept the room. Most of his other siblings had already called it a night and were either sleeping on the floor in sleeping bags or on the bunks hanging out from the walls. Mom was cradling Lily in her arms, who was sound asleep.
Lincoln's eyes narrowed. He hadn't thought of it before, but could it be possible that Lily was in league with Luan? Seeing how well she had pranked them last April Fools he wouldn't put it past her. But no. That was merely to bring Luan back to her old self, and if she was something would have happened already.
So what was it?
He finished his can and set the spoon to the side. Instead of disposing of it immediately he rolled it around with his hands. He felt around the smooth, cylindrical shape-
The Diazepam, that's what he had forgotten. He had left the bottle up in his room in the mad dash to safety. He felt a sort of panic that he had missed his usual dosage but calmed himself down knowing that he would shortly be asleep and nothing bad would happen during that time.
He chucked the can into the disposal bin and collected his comics and Bun-Bun. He then crawled inside one of the empty sleeping bags, puffed up the pillow and laid his head down. With Bun-Bun in the crook of his arm, he began to re-read through his comic pile.
Lincoln woke up with one of his comics covering his face. He moved it to the side with one hand and sat up. Dad was still snoring in the plush chair but everyone else was also starting to wake up.
"Finally," Lana said. "We can go back outside!"
They packed the sleeping bags back where they came from as Mom woke Dad up. They then crowded around the ladder, waiting to emerge. Lynn carried Lola over, who was still tied up. She placed her at the foot of the bottom rung and untied the rope. Lola massaged her wrists and began climbing. She spun the wheel around and pushed open the hatch, letting in morning sunlight and the sweet breeze of spring.
She was followed by her twin, then Dad carrying Lily, Leni, Mom, Luna, Lucy and Lisa. Lincoln grabbed a rung and prepared to climb up when he heard a noise.
Creak, creak
Lincoln turned around to see what the noise was and saw Lucy standing next to a platform with wheels. On top of it was a canvas covering. Lucy stopped the platform in front of a hanging bench anchored to the wall. She walked over to it and bent down, grasping for something underneath.
A part of the wall swung inwards without a sound, revealing a dark passageway. Lucy stepped back and pushed the platform down the hallway, with the door shutting behind her just as soundlessly as before.
Lincoln looked at the bench. He walked over to it and stuck his head in the gap, looking upwards. He saw a handle with a red rubber covering. He pulled it, turning it a quarter way clockwise.
The door he had seen swung open. He peered around the corner of it and saw a hallway leading down to a door in the shape of a nine cogged gear.
"Hey Lincoln," Leni called down. "Do you need some help getting back up here?"
"No," Lincoln yelled back up, "I'm good, just grabbing my stuff. He stepped back from the door to collect his things from the living room. When he got back to the entrance the door was shut by itself.
He climbed up the ladder and stepped out onto the grass of the backyard. He stretched and walked over to the house to get a proper breakfast and some Diazepam.