Supernatural: Chronicles of the Order 8
Chapter 18: Frailty and Fixtures
(DISCLAIMER: No, I don't own Supernatural because it belongs to Eric Kripke and Warner Bros. So, enjoy the show! Rated M for graphic violence, adult content, and adult language.)
It had been two days since I discovered Ifalna as everyone was seeing the splendor of the planet's flora and fauna already coming to life in one fell swoop. What everyone didn't know about was that a strange man appeared as he was seeing the tower and the housing complex that sprang from the Hartnell already in full circle. Getting out his binoculars, he was seeing everyone settling down until he noticed Ilaria rushing outside the moment he was more than glad that she was alive. The mysterious man, on the other hand, was tall and muscular with black hair and blue eyes as he was dressed up in pirate garb that made him look like a swashbuckler. He was eyeing Ilaria carefully as he was also grateful that she was out of Baratheon in which he had a loathing for the nobility, for they did nothing but impose a set of broken rules and a questionable set of patriarchal standards that were imposed after the Barathite royal family were ousted from power.
"There you are, little dove," he said as he put away his binoculars. "Thank Jack Kline and all the other gods that you made it out of there and away from those bastards from that deplorable nobility."
The mysterious man in pirate garb continued to observe everyone as he was also keeping an eye on Ilaria in which he was eternally grateful that she was away from harm. Still, he hated the fact that the son born from his loins and born from one of the local courtesans in the slums ended up dead along with the Elven woman he considered to be his daughter-in-law and Ilaria's mother. For a while, he had a grudge against the Barathite nobility as they did nothing but hide in their bubble of a capital while those in the city slums continued to starve while working to keep everyone fed, for he wanted change and restoration of the Barathite noble family as soon as possible.
"I'm glad that you're safe, Ilaria, but you can't hide from those bastards in the Barathite nobility forever," he said as he clenched his gloved fists. "It's a shame that two of your sisters were forced into being groomed for marriage in which they are slated to marry their future spouses in the capital. Luckily, Consuela escaped and is in the care of her uncle who lives in the Skalvarg Archipelago on Valinor."
"It seems that you found Ilaria, didn't you?" said Jack as he appeared out of nowhere.
"You have one hell of a streak to meddle in things, don't you, nephew?"
"We're in the central part of the Ashizoka System in which we're on Ifalna. Still, your granddaughter is in safe hands, but sooner or later, she would soon return to Baratheon to face the corrupt patriarchy of the Barathite nobility in their capital of Etrogarde, which was once a bastion of glory."
"Oh, Etrogarde was a bastion of glory until the nobles and all their influence have corrupted the capital in which those beneath them who speak against them end up dead. Even the chieftains and other officials want the Emperor and his family to return. Their stench reeks of forcing young girls to be groomed and educated in the ways of 'keeping sweet' against their wishes and aspirations. I hate those bastards in which they follow one man alone and that is Father Warren."
"You have a hatred for him, don't you?"
"Father Warren took over after the ouster of the Barathite royal family. He gave the nobility free reign to force young girls as young as ten to be taken and groomed to the family of his choosing. What's even worse is that all young girls must obey Father Warren's teachings just to 'keep sweet' and obey their future husbands and their families. Not even Juanita or Eugenia were safe from that pervert's gaze in which his cronies took them against their will to be assigned to the families who are loyal to him. One day, that perverted scumbag and those who kiss his ass will get their comeuppance in the form of justice. I lost one of my sons and his wife in which those who obeyed the teachings of Father Warren and his ass-kissers were responsible for not only speaking out against him and leaving Ilaria alone. They even executed them in broad daylight for not displaying that prick's portrait. Still, they were smart to dress Ilaria up as a boy and called her Ignacio, but she's gonna have to watch her back if not careful."
"You can't protect her forever, Nymeriel. Sooner or later, she will rise above the Barathite nobility and overthrow their poisoned ethics."
Nymeriel watched over Ilaria as he was not about to surrender her to the corrupt nobility who ruled Baratheon with an poisoned fist. Still, he was adamant into protecting his youngest granddaughter as he wasn't about to let the corrupt patriarchal nobility have their way, for he refused to let them near her, despite the fact that she flew under the radar while dressed up as a boy in the slums…
I was outside of the tower on Ifalna as I was seeing the crew of the Hartnell making themselves at home in which I even saw the humans who came along with them outside playing and enjoying more than what they were once used to centuries ago. Even though I was still in my wheelchair, I didn't mind wheeling myself around as I noticed Zindrith teaching some of the humans the basics of school and other vital things. Everything was going great on Ifalna as I was returning to the tower in which I noticed Ilaria going into the large housing complex structure that was crafted from the Hartnell. I followed her to where the structured place was inside as I followed her towards the back bay where the airlock was in which I found both Marnathi's police shuttle and the one that was stolen the moment it was intact. Ilaria went inside of the pilfered shuttle as she got out some of the food stuffs that she stole in which it ranged from Skalvarg caviar to smoked mirminar in which she was eager to take it with her until I stopped her from doing so.
"Taking from a pilfered police shuttle is stealing evidence," I said.
"It's the food that I saved in which I was wanting to get out of Baratheon, only to hide in this ark when it came through a wormhole straight to Ifalna," said Ilaria. "I always wanted to get out of that place of corruption since my parents dressed me up like a boy. Therefore, I have a new home and a better life here in which I also want to put some of my stuff in the tower for later."
"You have a lot of reasons to get away from the Barathite nobility, don't you?"
"The Barathite nobility only forces girls to be groomed into marriage. My mom and dad didn't want me to be put into the nobility in which they wanted me to live freely, even if it meant by stealing some of the choice morsels that they had."
"You had it rough living on the streets, didn't you?"
"My parents lost their lives for me in which I ended up living on the streets just to hide in the house that they had. When I dressed up as Ignacio, I took the time to steal the choice morsels that some of the lower class didn't have. The meal choices for those who lived in the slums were meat loaf, chipped beef on toast, navy bean soup, beanie weenies, and water pie. Those were the staples I lived on in which I wanted more than what got put into the slums."
I noticed Ilaria get out the stash she had as I saw her leave outside where the airlock was. When I followed her to the tower, I saw her go inside as she went into the kitchen to set her food stuffs on a counter. I never saw such fancy food that was mixed in with the typical rations that she took from the nobles. Even though I have discouraged others from stealing, Ilaria's case was different as she was also struggling to survive before she left Baratheon. I didn't blame her as she was also not only stealing from the nobles, but to get away from a patriarchy gone wrong.
"I've got enough food stuffs to last me for a while until I take up hunting here for fish or vegetables here on this planet," she said.
"You may have all the pilfered food stuffs, but there are others who need it," I said.
"Those Draaza who were in stasis have a hydroponics lab and are growing their fruits and vegetables." Ilaria looks at some of the food stuffs that she has. "I'll give them some, but from what I heard from their captain, the Terrans who came with them aren't into pork and shellfish because of religious concerns and I have a lot of Barathite ham just to last me for a while."
"You pilfered a lot more than just the choice morsels from Barathite nobles," said Marnathi as she entered into the kitchen. "I looked into your stash in which you were also collecting dried beef, cans of baked beans, a few small bags of pinto beans, canned spam, and some jerky. You were basically stocking up just to get out of Baratheon, only to land on Ifalna in which there had been signs of growth stemming from fish to other forms of vegetation that just popped up here."
"I mainly did that so I wouldn't starve. Some of the nobles on Baratheon have the luxury to enjoy good food while the rest of us scrounge from the donation dens that deliver the basic staples."
I wheeled myself to the table as I began to examine the food stuffs that Ilaria pilfered. The stash that she had was more than enough to keep everyone fed, but the problem with the Barathite ham that was in those metal containers was rendered forbidden to the human crewmembers who came alongside the Draaza on the Hartnell due to religious doctrine. Even though there was more for Ilaria to tide her over while being on Ifalna, she had an option to share some of it as she had it with her for a lot of reasons. I didn't feel like accusing her further of the theft as I also felt that someone like her needed good food instead of the nobility, for people in the slums never had that luxury.
"The food that you stole has a price value, but I won't hold it against you after what I heard about you being in the slums," I said. "Barathite ham is a delicacy that is both enjoyed by both the rich and the poor." I pick up a container of it as I examined the oblong metal container. "It's been years since I saw something like this."
"How do you know of this?" asked Ilaria.
"I tried something like this when I took a trip to Baratheon once when I was little. My father was hunting a botchling at the time in which he was also saved by the raw power that I have."
"Oh, he used his raw power to save Dad's ass at the time and ended up getting a fever," said Dean as he entered into the kitchen. "There's enough food to give to the Draaza and the humans in their care."
"The humans who travelled with the Draaza in the Hartnell can't have pork or shellfish because of religious concerns. For the rest of us, we'll have some breakfast."
It wasn't long until I heard footsteps approaching in which I wheeled myself out of the kitchen and spotted Kanna coming in which she was ready to make some breakfast for everyone. The picnic basket in her hands contained a large lacquer box in which she saw it to be some castella that was made a day earlier. Still, she wanted to make breakfast as I didn't blame her, for she was hungry like the rest of us.
"It's good that Reiko baked some castella to take in the picnic basket," she said.
"There's also some spam and Barathite ham courtesy of Ilaria," I said.
"Excuse me! Coming through!"
It wasn't long until I saw Reiko entering with a small basket of eggs in which she came here not only to retrieve me and Kanna, but to make breakfast for everyone. I was blessed to see her here as I was more than glad that she was there to bring the eggs. It wasn't long until Ilaria rushed out of the kitchen as she saw Reiko in person, for she never saw her before until now.
"You look like an angel," she said.
"And you look like a common thief who fled from your homeworld for a better life," said Reiko.
"I only stole the choice morsels just to add to my stockpile of food so I wouldn't go hungry. I know that theft is wrong, but I didn't have anything but the scraps that were given to the donation dens in the slums."
"Sometimes, the finer things aren't what they seem. You should also look into how good the morsels from the slums are and not judge a food tin by its appearance."
"I tried some Skalvarg caviar on some crackers and it tasted good. It even had a name that said 'The Singer House' on it as well. It's good caviar, but everyone should be entitled to having finer delicacies instead of the stuff from the slums."
I knew of that name very well as I went back into the kitchen to where the food stuffs were. When I spotted one of the small jars of caviar on the table, I examined it carefully as I saw the name of it that Ilaria mentioned earlier. The caviar itself was made sourcefully with care from the inn I stayed in on Cordell Island as I never expected Yavanna and her employees to make such a fine delicacy before until now. When I put it back onto the table, I saw Ilaria rush back into the kitchen as I noticed her getting out a container of Barathite ham just to make breakfast for the eggs that Reiko brought earlier, for she was starting to get hungry like the rest of us. I didn't blame her as I saw her washing her hands in the sink ald later opening up the oblong can of ham as she saw it to be fully preserved in its juices just in time for breakfast for a canned product.
The time for breakfast was commencing as Reiko got out a cast-iron skillet and placed it on the stove the moment it was turned on. When I saw her wash her hands, she was ready to cook some breakfast as she took some of the eggs and began to crack them into the skillet while blending them with a whisk. I loved how she made scrambled eggs as she was also wanting the Barathite ham to be added into it for later. When Ilaria was ready to empty out the ham, I got out a cutting board and a knife for her as she slowly took it out of its oblong can. By the time that Ilaria cut up the ham, she added it into the scrambled eggs as they also had a hint of salt and pepper into them. It was a good time to be in the kitchen as I watched them cook up the ham and eggs just in time for breakfast, for it was a wonderful time indeed.
"You know how to cut up the ham nicely," said Reiko.
"My mom taught me how to cook," said Ilaria.
"You're far away from you home in which your mother could be—"
"She's dead, along with my dad. I was left alone in which I had to spend four years alone in the house we lived in. They did nothing wrong but speak out against the nobles, but refused to display the picture of Father Warren in their home."
"Who is Father Warren?"
"He's the de facto leader who ousted the Barathite royal family in which everyone on the planet hates his guts. My older sisters, Juanita and Eugenia, were taken away to be groomed by the families who are loyal to that scumbag. Consuela got away, but I was the last one in the house while dressing up as a boy to avoid detection. Being under the radar made me the unsung thief of stealing some of the food stuffs that the nobles stashed just to survive. I was a regular thorn in the sides as being Ignacio just to have more than what I got from the donation dens and they have the bland stuff that I lived off of. Living free from the nobles' grasp was good and I didn't get caught. It was made that way until I decided to steal a watermelon and ended up getting caught by Officer Nucci, who beat me with his whip. He even told me that I was meant to rot in the slums, but he also wanted me to take off my clothes. I refused until he tore off my shirt to see that I bound my chest in which he knew of my secret. He backed off of finishing me with the lashes I received in which he would be punished by Father Warren if one girl is wracked with scars on her body."
"Luckily, you escaped in which you fled with what you had out of Baratheon," I said.
"I had that luck when Officer Nucci was ready to reveal my secret in which I ran back to my house and gathered up the food stuffs I had and went to the police shuttle that was close to it. I read a lot from those books that Mom and Dad had over the years in which I knew how to pilot the shuttle out of my homeworld and further to this place. I wanted a better life away from the nobles, away from Father Warren, away from the importance of 'keeping sweet,' and away from Officer Nucci. I'm happy here on Ifalna and I can even give my next door neighbors some of the stuff I've been hoarding just to survive."
Ilaria had her reasons to stay put on Ifalna as she refused to go back to Baratheon after what she went through just to get free. I didn't blame her as she had her reasons to be here in which she was in a tower instead of being in the slums of Etrogarde. The lashes on her body under the Draaza dress she wore were a reminder of how she endured such hardship while stealing food from the nobles who lived all over Baratheon's capital since the deaths of her parents. All I wanted to do was to comfort her instead of chastising her, for she has been through too much toil already after fleeing from a troubled system ran by misogyny and corruption altogether…
Nymeriel walked towards the housing complex where the Hartnell was integrated into as he saw the Draaza crew hard at work making their name for themselves while being on Ifalna. He never saw anything like it before as he noticed some of the crewmembers even getting out some of fruits and vegetables that were effected by the raw power that made them grow faster in the hydroponics lab earlier. The array of potatoes, carrots, onions, and celery were put there as they were ready to be put into further dinners for everyone. Nymeriel never expected to see fruits and vegetables to be grown rapidly as he noticed Zindrith returning with some fish in a cooler that were caught in one of the ponds just in time for dinner, for this was a first step of making a home here on Ifalna.
"Looks like you guys are having fish and chips for dinner," he said.
"The fish came here unexpectedly, but we've got some trout and walleye to tide us over for tonight and tomorrow," said Zindrith as she placed the cooler near the entrance. "I've fished a lot during my stay on Earth in which the only catches that I've caught are walleye, trout, and catfish. The ocean fish known as salmon and sturgeon were forbidden to catch because of how endangered they were. We couldn't even catch any tuna without telling what color the fin was."
"Your captain must have told you not to catch the good stuff at the time. Now that Ifalna has been vitalized and fit for living, there are plenty of fish and other game to hunt and catch."
"Earlier, that crossdressing Half-Elf gave us some of her stash of smoked fish that she pilfered in which the humans in our care didn't mind as long as it isn't pork or shellfish because of religious concerns."
"The humans in your care are mostly Muslims, aren't they?"
"When our ark left Earth, the people who kept us safe were worried about their daughters being forced to be bogged down by the Taliban, so they allowed them to be with us so they could have a much better life with us. We never forgot about the kindness of those people, but they've been dead since we left in the time of the Olympics in Atlanta."
"Your people made a smart decision to get the girls out of harm's way. As for a certain crossdressing Half-Elf, on the other hand, I've came to check on her in which she made herself home in that tower next door to your housing complex. Luckily, she's safe from the scumbags that live on Baratheon.
It wasn't long until Ilaria came out of the tower as she saw Nymeriel standing in front of her. She knew of him very well as she spotted him all dressed in his pirate clothing. Still, she had to respect him as she was also thankful that he stepped in just to help her parents dress her up like a boy so she wouldn't get put into the den of groomers, for she was happy that he came here.
"It's so good to see you, Grandpa," she yelled as she hugged him warmly.
"From the look of it, your joyride in a police shuttle took a detour to this planet," said Nymeriel.
"You just missed breakfast earlier and Lady Reiko was cooking for us while the neighbors had their own."
"You took off in a police shuttle and made it here in an ark. It's good that you made it out of Baratheon in which I didn't want you or Consuela to be groomed by the likes of Father Warren or those in the Barathite nobility."
It wasn't long until I wheeled myself outside as I saw Nymeriel out in the open in which he was humbled to see me. He knew of me very well as he was no stranger to seeing me not in fine fettle, for the battle has taken its toll on me in the past two years.
"Sam Winchester…," he said to me. "After two years of recovery, you ended up getting an unwanted setback."
"It wasn't by choice," I said.
"I was there when the Medical Corps found you unconscious in which you nearly lost your life that day when you put a dent in the Executive Division's dastardly plans for chaos. Your efforts to destroy Project Amaterasu and even go up against Sawney Masbath took a toll on your overall health in which I convinced the Order's higher-ups to force a furlough on you so you would recover."
"And it all went down the toilet when Seto and Maro intervened to force me to return to the field against my wishes. I… ended up using my raw power to save Seto from a Jefferson Starship in which it was hell-bent on killing her. She recanted when she saw the medical results that I had, for she backed off so I would continue my convalescence. As for Maro, he kept going in which he even put a collar around my neck so I would do what he said. I didn't like being forced when I had to back off, but I had no choice when I had to destroy a drowner nest during my stay on Cordell Island on Valinor. It took a lot out of me and I can't let myself be led astray again."
"Leave it to Maro to do that…"
I remembered Maro's trickery very well as it began to haunt me in which I began to shake in my wheelchair. The images of Hell's dungeon scared me to extremes as I remembered Maro taunting me in which I was rendered weak and useless. The mere thought about me being bogged down by my mental health was even equated to being weakness as I had nothing but contempt for my tormentor, for he would get what was coming to him if he didn't back off. Just as I was about to observe a little more of the people who were adjusting to life on Ifalna, I was wheeled back into the tower as I turned around and saw Reiko bringing me to a sitting room that had a cheery atmosphere. The sight of the many balls of yarn in a decorative basket caught my eye as I was wanting to try a new hobby, but the distraction of Maro's toxic remarks kept me from having a sense of calm.
"It never ends with what I went through," I said.
"You shouldn't dwell on what happened to you, Sammy," said Reiko as she saw tears running down my cheeks. "Maro thinks that not talking about your mental health equates to being weak, but he's wrong."
"And he says that men bottling up their fragile emotions shows manliness and the exception of the typical 'boys will be boys' mentality." I see Reiko wiping the tears from my face as I was still feeling uneasy due to Maro's constant wrath towards me. "It's all too much for me…"
"Don't even think about it, Sammy. You can't be bogged down by that horrible mindset forever in which Maro's tactics will not prosper right now." I see Reiko fish out a set of knitting needles as she gave them to me with some yarn that is tied to them. "It's time to take your mind off of the toxic masculinity and focus on a healthy coping mechanism instead. Besides, you can't let that negativity get to you. Therefore, I need to get back to the island with Kanna, okay? I'll check up on you when you feel a little better."
"Thank you…"
I saw Reiko hugging me warmly as she left the sitting room just for me to take up a new hobby. I was looking at the yarn as I was trying my hardest to knit, but to no avail. The beginner's luck wasn't working for me as it was hard for me to do the typical "knit one, purl two" instructions in which I could hear Maro in my head berating me for being weak.
"So, you're taking up knitting instead of kicking ass and taking names, are you?" he said in my head as I was trying to block him out. "That's so gay! I've seen manlier men go out and take down monsters instead of knitting."
"Get out of my head!" I yelled.
"I won't leave your head until you bend the knee and return to the field. Pendragon may have punished me for continuing my crusade to get you back in the game, but it became a bust when I was forced to get a taste of my own medicine!"
"I refuse to listen to your toxic rhetoric." I was ready to resume my new hobby as I felt my hands shaking while holding the knitting needles. "Knit one, purl two; knit one…, purl two."
"I've seen old women do better than you because men can't knit worth a crap. Men who knit are men who are weak. Are you a weakling, Sam? Are you eager to man up and drop your new hobby so you can be more manly just to bet on getting by in the Order? Therefore, you can't do anything when it comes to being kind and you can't just get anything done by doing that. Therefore, it's time to drop the yarn and knitting needles and be more like the action stars before you."
I ignored Maro's voice as I continued to knit in which I didn't want him to get to me. The sight of the yarn being crafted into something different was a reprieve that kept me stable. I continued to knit as was doing fine in which I was making a small sock out of a pastel blue yarn. When I finished crafting it, I put away the yarn and knitting needles as I was ready to leave the sitting room until I saw Maro appearing out of nowhere in which he was not too happy with me in which he was there to issue a warning, for he was getting tired of me for not being on the field.
"I gave you free rein to use your raw power and you continue to ignore me," he said as he was fiddling with the collar around his neck. "You continue to be in your so-called 'convalescence' while innocent people end up dead at the hands of the Executive Division and their attack dogs."
"You can't force me to use my raw power while I'm still on the mend, Maro," I said. "Haven't you learned your lesson already?"
"You have an obligation to literally prove yourself and yet you get chastised for using something that is beneficial to help us put a damper on the Executive Division. And you call yourself a man! I've seen action stars kick ass and take names in which they don't discuss or display their emotions and yet there are some pansies who go apeshit over the death of a pet dog. Take a look at the action star: stoic, brawny, muscular, and absolutely manly. Then, there's the wussy hitman wannabe: emo, scrawny, wearing a cheap suit, and mainly a pussy. Do you want to be like the action star or do you want to be like the scrawny animal-loving pansy? Think of the stoic action star who gets the job done and the pansy who believes in kindness. And do you know what happened to the latter? He ends up shot up with bullet holes. You can't get anything done with kindness and you never will! So, will you step up your a-game and become the action star or become like the pussy hitman who lost his dog?"
I was backed in a corner as I was at the mercy of Maro until I saw him wincing in pain due to the collar around his neck causing him misery. I got up from my wheelchair I was ready to accept the offer until I saw Nelliel appearing out of nowhere in which he was there to keep my tormentor on a much shorter leash. I had a feeling that the Knight of Heaven would haul him back out of Ifalna as he wasn't having it with his bullying tactics, for enough was enough already.
"You really know how to put a damper on my fun, don't you?" said Maro as he was wincing in pain.
"You may have the gall to harass Sam by adhering to returning to work, but enforcing toxic masculinity?" said Nelliel. "You knew that Sam's mental health is more important and yet you force him to adhere to not asking for help when he's about to have a mental breakdown."
"Asking for help about one's mental health can make a man weak." Maro continues to wince in pain as he felt the collar burning his neck. "Sam needs to return to the field work or else more people will suffer all over this galaxy."
"You're making it up, Maro. I heard about your constant head games that you do to Sam if he didn't return to work and yet you even forced him to use his raw power against his wishes to destroy a drowner nest in one of the Skalvarg Archipelago islands on Valinor. You knew that he wasn't up to full power and yet you made him do so in which it made him more exhausted than before."
"If Sam hadn't used his raw power to destroy the drowner nest, there would've been more of those things infesting all over Cordell Island. You should at least thank him for getting rid of it."
"I got rid of it, but the surge of raw power nearly killed me," I said. "As for that collar around your neck, it fits you better than it fits me. Who's the trained poodle now, Maro? Who's the one who has a rolled up newspaper put in front?! It's about time that you got a taste of your own medicine for once!"
I was ready to let Maro have it until Nelliel used a banishing sigil to make him disappear. Even though he was gone for now, that didn't mean that he was out of the way yet as I didn't want to stoop to his level right now. I had to maintain my convalescence as I also had to make sure that I didn't act on the same level as my tormentor, for I simply put my foot down after that.
"You may have jumped the gun, but you can't just be on the same level as Maro," said Nelliel as he saw me sit down in my wheelchair. "Even though he put you through his illusory images of Hell's dungeon in all its bone and entrails glory, you can't just bring out the 'eye for an eye' tactic, for it's unhealthy even for you in a high caliber."
"Maro had it coming," I said. "He may have continued his failed crusade to bring me back to the field when Seto backed off, but I won't obey his protestations so quickly." I felt my hands shaking as I was on the verge of a panic attack. "My mental health is important right now and I won't bog down to the toxic thinking that Maro mentioned, either."
"He was using the typical toxic masculinity narrative on you, wasn't he?" I nodded as I began to weep. "He's goading you into going back on the field in which his perception of people dying at the hands of the Executive Division is just a ruse to keep you on your heels without knowing of the cautions you're facing, both physically and mentally. I feared the worst when you went up against Sawney Masbath two years ago. I was there when you were comatose while you wept in your sleep in which I also did everything to make sure that you didn't fade away. As for the war effort, the ones who you gave the imprint of raw power to have did their best to protect those in need while going up against the Executive Division and those who fight alongside them. You're not carting the heavy burden alone, Sam. There are those who have more faith in the Destiny of Worlds than what you think. Besides, you have a lot to live and learn for when you need to have in your recovery."
Nelliel disappeared without a trace as I was glad that I had that talk. I wasn't about to cave into the toxic masculinity narrative as I refused to give into such horrible messaging. When I resumed my knitting, I saw Dean entering as he was concerned for my health in which he was aware of what was going on the moment he saw me making another small sock, for this was very uncommon for me to do so.
"Looks like you took up a new hobby instead of being berated by the usual suspects," I heard him say. "At least you're not goaded out of your convalescence right now 'cause your mental health needs to be addressed so you won't fall apart."
"It's tempting to return to work, but I can't be led astray forever," I said as I continued to knit. "As soon as we return to our respective posts, we'll be back in our usual positions." I sighed as I began to weep more. "If only I did a little more than what's been limited to me…"
"You're more than enough 'cause you matter. Don't let anyone else tell you otherwise."
"And yet, Maro retaliates by telling me not to express my feelings or ask for help with what I have."
"Maro is full of crap! He thinks that not doing those things can make some us more manly, but it's exactly the opposite. We may be born men, but we have a primal obligation to ask for help if we've been made to look weak. Furthermore, asking for help is not equated to weakness. Besides, you can get things done with being kind and that's one of the greatest superpowers that you have. You brought Ifalna to life and the people living here are thankful that they have a place to live. Even Ilaria loves living here."
I stopped knitting as I felt tears running down my cheeks. I wanted to do a lot more as I also had to focus on the mental health that I have. Still, I had to deal with the pain and anguish of being put under the microscope as I also had to stay strong when it came to having plenty of support. I froze as I had the knitting needles in my hands the moment I saw Kanna entering into the room, for she saw me with the tears in my eyes the moment she went towards me just to give me a warm hug.
"You're not alone, Sam," she said. "You've been there for us in which you showed us empathy."
"She's telling it to you straight," said Dean.
"You've been there for me when I had my first period and now I'm helping Ilaria navigate the perils of the unmentionable problem most women and girls have. You were worried about me, but I worry about you because you take care of us."
"And I continue to keep focused on my convalescence," I said as I hugged back. "I won't be swayed by those who view me as a weapon instead of a humanoid. I deserve to have dignity as a humanoid being instead of a weapon because I won't be put under the bus by those who don't care about the mental condition that I have. For most of my life, I've endured the loneliness, cruelty, and even being backed into a corner as if I didn't exist but to be a servant. For years, I've wanted someone else to succeed to better things, but there wasn't any aspirations for me in general."
"There is," said Nymeriel as he entered into the sitting room. "You need to look further than what you're used to."
I looked at Nymeriel directly as he was mainly a Knight of Heaven in which he was also brimming with optimism. Even though he noticed me, he was aware of the frailty that I suffered from after the battle against Sawney Masbath two years ago. Like Maro and Miriam, Nymeriel didn't look at me in shame as he was no stranger into looking at what was going on with me, for he couldn't bear to see me be put under the feet of my tormentors.
"It's been two years since you flew off the radar, Sam," he said.
"You must be Nymeriel," I said.
"You helped care for Ilaria in which I'm grateful that she's here instead of being on Baratheon. Still, you help those in need than having a little time for yourself."
"It's complicated, but I'll manage…"
"Hey! You can't just come here when Sam's not doing too well!"
I heard Marnathi's voice coming from the hall as I spotted Reuben standing there the moment I was about to be going back home to my family. Still, I had to adhere to protocol as I was facing everyone here on Ifalna, for I also had to be put under the medicinal microscope of the Medical Corps for a lot of reasons…
Later on in the afternoon, I was in the infirmary wing of the tower as I was laying down on an examination table. Reuben was busy examining me for possible stressors as he was on top of things just like his late predecessor. Even though I wasn't too thrilled with being put under the microscope of being examined, I had no other choice but to obey and keep still once the examination was over with.
"Your stress levels still haven't improved…, again!" I heard Reuben say to me.
"Maro gave me a hard time," I said.
"I've heard of him and he refuses to give up on forcing you to return to work even after you destroyed that drowner nest on Cordell Island."
"And he has a shock collar around his neck as punishment for forcing me to go against my wishes in general."
"I take it that you've been busy knitting booties instead of being forced to go back on the field."
"That's none of your concern. I had to find a different hobby to do instead of being stewing in the pot of toxic masculinity." I saw Reuben walking towards me as he was touching at my stomach for some odd reason in which there was something off. "If you're wanting to do a colonoscopy on me, I could turn over and endure the camera shoved beneath my undercarriage."
"Don't even try it, Sam!"
"What the hell's going on? What is it that you're not telling me?!"
"Before you go apeshit, I suggest that you look at the scanning screen to see."
I stared at the screen on the ceiling as I spotted a pair of twin fetuses in a crafted womb inside me. I was shocked to see this as I didn't know what to think. What I saw was not for the faint of heart as I was in the worst situation imaginable in which I didn't know what to say to Reiko, for she was the one who carried children until birth instead of me.
"This is impossible," I said as I was shocked to see what was on screen. "How could I be pregnant?"
"Looks like the roles have been reversed," said Reuben.
It wasn't long until I saw Reiko rushing into the infirmary wing as she had Jack in tow. Still, I never expected her to be in a scolding mood as she was not about to let the King of Heaven off the hook in which he was put into the doghouse, for he had to explain this turn of reversal.
"He played a dirty trick on Sammy," I heard her say. "He used his tricks to place what I carried into Sammy's body without my knowledge. He should tell us next time before pulling such a troubling stunt like this."
"I had to do it, Lady Reiko," said Jack. "It was the only way to keep him grounded so that Maro and Miriam wouldn't force him to go back on the field. I couldn't let him be forced to use his raw power while he's not in fine fettle."
"You should apologize to Sammy."
"It's fine, Reiko," I said as I got up from the examination table. "Even though the roles of childbirth have been reversed, it's a win not to let the likes of Maro force me to go back on the field while I'm in convalescence."
I was ready to leave the infirmary wing as I later noticed everyone standing in front of me. They were ready to protect me as I was not only recovering from the battle from two years ago, but I had two tiny passengers inside me, for they were the ones who also saved me from further degradation that nearly killed me…
To be continued...