Back in Black by AC/DC opens the scene. Writing on the screen says Kunar Province, Afghanistan. A hand is shown holding a glass of scotch.
"Why am I not surprised that you were drinking?" Pepper asked, or rather, stated.
The screen pans out to show that it is Tony.
He says that he feels live he's being driven to court Marshall and asks what he did, then says that it feels like they're going to pull over and snuff him and asks if they're allowed to talk.
"You should be more respectful to soldiers, Stark." Steve said, not disrespectfully, but still in a 'no-nonsense' type of way.
The soldier in the front seat says that they can talk.
Tony asks if its personal.
The driver says that he intimidates them.
"you do have that effect on people." Pepper said. Tony smirked in reply.
Tony is shocked when he realizes she's a woman and says that he couldn't have called it, and that he thought of her as a soldier first.
"Nice save." Rhodey whispered, sarcastically into Tony's ear.
She tells him she's an airman.
Tony compliments her bone structure and says that he's having a hard time not looking at her and asks if that's weird.
"It's a little weird." Maria said.
"Just a bit." Natasha added, sarcastically.
The soldiers start snickering and Tony encourages them to laugh.
The soldier in the front says that he has a question for Tony and asks if it was true that he went twelve for twelve with last years maxim cover models.
"Really?" Scott asked. Tony could only shrug in reply, its not that he was ashamed of his playboy days- quite the opposite actually as he usually flaunted it- but sometimes all of the talk got a little old.
Tony says that its an excellent question and answers it y saying that he did but he didn't because the girl for March and he had a scheduling conflict, but the Christmas cover was twins.
"You couldn't keep it in your pants, could you?" Clint said.
"No. No he couldn't." Rhodey answered before Tony even got the chance to try and defend himself.
The soldier in the seat next to him raises his hand, Tony asks if he's kidding when he does it.
"Can't you tell he's nervous?" Steve asked, mildly annoyed.
The soldier asks if he could have a picture.
Tony says that it is very cool. The soldier pulls out a camera and passes it to the guy in the front seat. Tony says that he doesn't want to see this on Myspace.
"What's Myspace?" Steve asked. The guardians and Asgardians also looked confused.
"Its like Facebook but for people born in the '90s." Bruce answered. Some people still looked confused- they didn't know what a Facebook was either- but dropped the question.
The soldier next to Tony holds up a peace sign. Tony asks him not to. The soldier puts his hand down. Tony retracts his previous statement and says that he was kidding. The soldier puta his hand back up. "Yeah, peace, I love peace, I'd be out of a job with peace."
Wanda glared. Of course, the Tony she'd met had changed, but this was not him.
"Not anymore." Tony muttered, looking anywhere but at the screen.
The soldier in the front seat is having trouble with the camera. The soldier tells him to hurry up and not change any settings. A bomb suddenly blows up beside the vehicle. Gunshots can also be heard.
Everyone in the room flinched, not expecting it. Well everyone except Fury, Hill, Natasha, Clint because they're trained to handle situations like these with calmness, and Tony, who knew what was coming. Pepper grabbed Tony's arm.
Tony asks what's going on.
A soldier shouts contact left and gets out of the vehicle.
Tony asks what the situation is.
The soldier tells Jimmy to stay with Stark and then exits the vehicle, then gets shot down.
Jimmy swears and gets out as well.
"Listen to your orders! Stay there!" Steve yelled, worried for the young man.
Bucky gave him a look that said 'now was not the time to say that'.
"Steve he's panicking... also why would you want to stay in a vehicle that is actively being attacked?" Bruce asked.
Tony tells him to wait and give him a gun. Jimmy tells him to stay, then he gets shot. Bullets pierce the side of the Humvee. Tony hears ringing in his ears. Disoriented, he exits the vehicle.
"What are you doing? Stay there! You're gonna get hurt." Steve yelled at Tony.
"Steve." Bucky consoled. "Now is not the time."
Tony runs for cover behind a large boulder. He pulls out his phone and tries to call for help when a bomb lands a few feet away from him. He looks at it and notices that it reads 'Stark Industries.'
"Oh no."
He yells and tries to move away before the bomb explodes but is too slow. The bomb detonates and Tony gets sent flying back.
"You got blown up by a bomb! literately with your name on it!" Scott said.
"If that isn't the definition of Irony then I don't know what is." Happy said.
His senses are dulled and he goes to check the damage. He rips open his shirt to see he is bleeding through his bulletproof vest.
"That actually happened to you?" Quill asked. Tony nodded sharply, the experience now fresh in his mind again. He had hoped the movie wouldn't show this.
Pepper was still clinging onto Tony for dear life, as if he would suddenly disappear. She knew some of what happened to him in Afghanistan but nothing could have prepared her for seeing it with her own two eyes.
The screen reads 'Las Vegas 36 hours earlier.'
A video is playing. A narrator talks about Tony, calling him a visionary, a genius and an American patriot. And says that even from an early age, tony stole the spotlight from legendary weapons developer Howard Stark.
'Legendary' Steve thought. 'Howard must have made something of himself after the war. Clearly the flying car never worked out though.'
The narrator continues saying that when Tony was four, he built his first circuit board, when he was six he built his first engine and he graduated summa cum laude from MIT when he was seventeen. Pictures of Tony when he was young flash on the screen.
"You were an adorable child." Pepper smiled.
"Wait, really? 17?" Clint asked.
"Well I am a genius, birdbrain I don't just say that for no reason." Tony said. People rolled their eyes, but some were reluctantly impressed.
The narrator starts talking about Howard Stark's death. A newspaper that reads 'Howard and Maria Stark Dead' is shown.
The narrator continues, saying that Howard Starks friend Obadiah Stane steps in to help fill the gap that was left.
Tony's expression darkened at the mention of Obadiah.
The narrator finishes, saying that Tony returns at age twenty-one and is anointed the new CEO of Stark Industries, and that Tony ushers in a new era for his father's legacy by creating smarter weapons, advanced robotics, and satellite targeting and that he has changed the face of the weapons industry by ensuring freedom and protecting America and her interests around the globe.
Rhodey is now onstage, giving a speech.
"You look different Rhodey." Strange commented.
"I do, don't I?" Rhodey replied.
"I never got to hear this speech." Tony says, Rhodey just gives him an exasperated look.
Rhodey says that as a liaison to Stark Industries he's had the privilege of serving with a real patriot, he says that this person is his mentor and his friend and says that it is an honor to present this year's Apogee Award to Tony Stark. Rhodey looks around for Tony, but can't find him.
"You weren't there, were you?" Natasha asked with a knowing smirk.
"Uh, no I was not." Tony Replied. The original 6 avengers and Pepper shook their heads, of course.
Rhodey looks through the crowd, trying to spot tony. Only to find that he wasn't there. Obadiah Looks up and shakes his head. Then he walks to the stage and thanks Rhodey, calling him by his air force rank.
"Colonel? you're in the army?" Steve asked.
"Air force." Rhodey corrected.
Rhodey thanks him for the save and exits.
Obadiah holds the award and calls it beautiful and thanks everyone.
Tony, Pepper, Rhodey and Coulson all glared. 'Backstabbing son of a bitch' Pepper thought to herself.
Obadiah says that this is wonderful, and makes a comment about not being Tony Stark.
"That much was obvious." Rhodey said.
Obadiah then says that if he were Tony he would tell them how honored he feels and what a joy it is to receive this prestigious award. Then he says that the best and worst thing about Tony is that he's always working.
"Well, he's not wrong." Bruce commented.
Tony is at the casino.
"Maybe he was wrong." Bruce said.
"It was Vegas." Tony offered as his only justification, which to some made complete sense.
Tony looks to the girl beside them and tells her that they should stay the night.
Then Rhodey appears next to him and calls him unbelievable.
Tony asks, with faux concern, if they had roped him into this.
Rhodey says nobody roped him into anything.
"Yes they did." Rhodey yelled with a glare at Tony.
Tony apologizes.
Rhodey says that they told him that if he's presented Tony with an award that he'd be deeply honored.
"And I would have been." Tony said.
"I'm sure you would have." Rhodey said. "had you actually bothered showing up." He added under his breath.
"What was that?" Tony asked.
"Nothing." Rhodey said quickly, too quickly.
Tony says that he would be honored and asks when they do it.
Rhodey pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "You really need to keep better track of your engagements."
Rhodey just hands him the award. Tony says that it was easy and apologizes again.
Rhodey says its okay.
"I was actually sorry, you know." Tony said.
Tony looks at the award and comments that he doesn't have any of them floating around.
"Would it kill you to show at least some gratitude?" Natasha asked.
He turns to the girl and asks her to give him a little 'something something'. She seductively blows on the dice. Tony turns to Rhodey who says he doesn't blow on a mans dice. Tony insists and calls him 'Honeybear.'
"Honeybear?" Clint asked, barely containing his laughter.
Rhodey hits the dice out of Tony's hand. "Two craps, line away." The dealer says.
a few people winced.
Rhodey says that that's what happens.
Tony says worse things have happened and that they're gonna be fine and tells William to color him up. They walk to the door and Tony says that this is his exit.
Rhodey tells him not to be late tomorrow.
Tony says that he can count on it. Rhodey says he's serious. "Yeah, you can count on it."
"I'm serious."
"You were late, weren't you?" Gamora asked.
"He left me standing there for THREE HOURS" Rhodey complained.
"You're still on that?" Tony asked.
Tony says that he knows and gives the award to a man in costume, telling him to render onto Ceaser that which is Ceaser's.
"Dude, did you just give sway an Apogee award?" Scott asked.
Tony nodded. "I didn't really care back then."
A woman walks up to him when they're outside. She tells him that she's with Vanity Fair magazine and asks if she could ask a few questions.
Happy tells Tony that Christine is cute. Tony verifies.
That statement resulted in a series of glares.
"You only talk to reporters if they are cute?" Loki asked, but received no answer.
Tony turns around and greets her. She greets him back. Tony tells her to ask her questions.
Christine makes sure its okay before saying that he's been called the Da' Vinci of their time and asks what he has to say about that.
Tony says that its ridiculous, and that he doesn't paint.
"Can't be serious for one minute, can you?" Fury said.
Christine asks what he has to say about his other nickname: The Merchant of Death.
"Well that took a dark turn." Quill said.
Tony says that it's not bad.
Tony looked down in shame.
Tony guesses that she went to Berkeley.
Christine says that she actually went to Brown.
"She went to an Ivy league school for Journalism?" Pepper asked, for some reason the premise seemed bizarre to her but to each their own.
Tony says that its an imperfect world but its the only one they have, and he guarantees that the day weapons aren't needed to keep the peace he'll start making bricks and beams for baby hospitals.
"That's the best you could come up with?" Rhodey asked.
Christine asks if he rehearses that statement much.
Tony says that he does every night in the mirror before bed.
"Its true, I can attest to that." Rhodey said.
Christine says that she could see that. Tony says he'd like to show her.
"That was smooth." Clint spoke, before getting wacked in the head by Natasha.
Christine says that she only wants a serious answer.
"Good luck." Natasha said.
Tony says he has one and says that his old man had a philosophy and it was that peace meant having a bigger stick than the other guy.
"Not a very good philosophy if you ask me." Steve said. "Just sounds like a world living in perpetual terror of being attacked by the guy with the 'bigger stick'."
"Boy are you gonna have a blast when you learn about the cold war." Rhodey said, sarcastcally.
Christine says that it's a great line from the guy selling the sticks.
Tony says that his father helped defeat the Nazis and that he worked on the Manhattan project, going on to say that a lot of people, including Christine's professors would call that being a hero.
Christine says that people would also call it war profiteering.
"Wow, she's really trying to piss you off isn't she?" Rhodey asked.
"She's trying to make him lose his cool so she has something 'juicy' to put in her article." Natasha said.
Tony tears his glasses off. Tony asks if she plans to report on the millions they've saved by advancing medical technology or those kept from starvation with their intelli-crops, and comments that all of those breakthroughs were military funding.
Off screen Tony winced as he saw himself lose his composure.
Christine asks if he's ever lost an hour of sleep in his life.
"So many." Tony said, quietly to himself.
Tony says he's prepared to lose a few with her.
"why was that also smooth?" Scott asked.
Tony and Christine are making out on a bed. They fall off of the bed and Tony laughs.
"Ew." Muttered Peter and the rest of the teenagers (MJ, Ned, and Shuri) agreed with him. They did not need to see that.
Christine is lying Face down on the bed lower half covered with the bed sheets, upper half uncovered.
JARVIS greets her and tells her that it is 7am and that it is 72 degrees in Malibu with scattered clouds, the surf conditions will be fair with waist to shoulder high lines and high tide is at 10:52am.
Christine puts on a shirt and looks out the window. The screen reads 'Malibu, California.'
"I am groot." Groot said.
"What did he say?" Bruce asked.
"He said that Tony has a nice house." Thor responded, much to everyone's shock.
"When did you learn to speak Groot?" Gamora asked.
"They taught it on Asgard, it was an elective." Thor responded. It was a half truth but who cares. Yes, Groot was an elective class on Asgard, and yes he took it with Loki because they thought it would be interesting, but they didn't really need to because of the Allspeak.
Christine is walking around Tony's house wearing nothing but a shirt and her underwear. She calls out for Tony, then walks over to the wall and touches something.
JARVIS says that she isn't authorized to access the area. Christine flinches.
"Who is talking to her?" Scott asked.
"That's JARVIS he is my AI." Tony says.
"Oh, like an Alexa." Ned said.
"Dude don't just say her name she might hear you." Peter warned.
"What is Alexa?" Bruce asked.
Pepper appears behind her, carrying her clothes. She introduces JARVIS and says that he runs the house.
"And my life." Tony added.
Pepper says the she has Christine's and that they've been cleaned and pressed and there's a car outside that will take her anywhere she'd like to go.
Christine says that she must be the famous Pepper Potts.
Pepper confirms this.
Christine comments that after all these years, Tony still has her picking up the dry cleaning.
Everyone in the room glared at Christine.
Pepper says that she does anything and everything Tony needs her to, including taking out the trash occasionally.
"Boom, roasted!." Shuri yelled and all the teens laughed.
"That was quite the comeback." Natasha said.
Tony is working on a car in his workshop. He tells JARVIS to give him an exploded view of it.
"Okay so... better than Alexa." Ned said. "She only listens to me about half the time, other times I just get answers like 'Sorry, I don't know that."
JARVIS says that the compression in cylinder three is low. Tony tells him to log it.
Pepper is on the phone walking down the stairs. She walks in and the music turns down. Tony says to please not turn down his music.
Pepper rolled her eyes.
Pepper says she keep whoever she's on the phone with posted then hangs up. She turns to Tony and says that he's supposed to be halfway around the world.
Tony asks how Christine took it. Pepper says she took it like a champ.
"If by champ you mean running out of there with her tail between her legs, than sure she took it like a champ." Maria said to Pepper.
Tony asks why she's trying to hustle him out of the house.
Pepper says his flight was supposed to leave an hour and a half ago.
Tony comments that its his plane and he thought it'd just wait for him to arrive.
"The man has a point." Bucky said.
"Bucky." Steve sighed.
"What...? He does. If its your jet, why wouldn't it wait for you?" He asked. "Makes no sense."
Pepper says she needs to talk to him about a few things before he leaves.
Tony asks what the purpose of having his own plane is if it departs before he arrives.
"He does have a point." Clint agreed with Bucky. "But it is still good to be on time, especially when you have people waiting on you like... dude."
Pepper says that Larry called and he has another buyer for the Jackson Pullok painting and asks if he wants it.
Tony asks if its a good representation of his spring period.
"I don't think-" Bruce started.
Pepper says no and that The Springs was the neighborhood in East Hampton where he lived and not the season spring. She says she thinks its a fair example and that she thinks its incredibly overpriced.
Tony says that he needs it and tells pepper to buy it and store it.
"Why do you need a Jackson Pullock painting?" Quill asked.
"I need it." Was the only answer he got.
"But you're just gonna store it anyw-" Quill gets cut off by Tony repeating that he needs it.
Pepper moves on to the MIT commencement speech.
Tony says that its in June and not to harangue him about stuff thats way down the line.
Pepper says that they're haranguing her so she's gonna say yes.
Tony says to deflect it and absorb it and not to transmit it back to him.
"Is this how your conversations usually go?" T'Challa asked.
"No." "Yes." Tony and pepper said at the same time.
Pepper says she needs him to sign something before he leaves.
Tony asks what she's trying to get rid of him for and if she has plans.
Pepper says that she does.
"It's your birthday, isn't it?" Hope asked Pepper.
Pepper nodded.
"You forgot didn't you?" Scott asked Tony.
Tony nodded.
Tony says that he doesn't like when she has plans.
"Oh boo hoo. My assistant has plans. Grow up." Natasha said, playfully.
"You're so mean to me." Tony said.
"Someone has to be." Natasha justified.
Pepper says she's allowed to have plans on her birthday.
Tony asks if its her birthday. Pepper confirms.
Tony says that he knew that.
"But you didn't, though." Ned said.
Tony asks 'already?'
Pepper says yes, and asks if its strange then says its the same day as last year.
"Ah fuck, I cant believe you've done this." Peter said in an English accent.
"Language!" Steve yelled.
Bucky looked at him incredulously. "You've said worse, you hypocrite." He whispered.
Steve glanced from side to side. "Clearly we remember things differently." He said. Bucky froze up for a split second.
Tony tells her to get something nice from him.
Pepper says the she already did.
Tony inquires for more detail.
Pepper says it was very nice, very tasteful and thanks him.
Tony says she's welcome.
"Moments." Peter, Ned and Shuri whispered together.
Two cars are racing down the street. They eventually pull into an empty parking lot. Tony gets out of one of them, Happy gets out of the other. Tony asks if Happy's good saying that he thought he lost him.
"Why are you the way that you are?" Rhodey asked.
Happy says that he did and that he had to cut across Mohalland.
Tony nods and walks toward the plane where Rhodey is waiting.
Rhodey asks what's wrong with him. Tony feigns confusion. Rhodey just says three hours.
"You stood there for three hours?" Drax asked. Rhodey nodded. "Did you become invisible?" Drax asked.
"No?" Rhodey asks.
"Then you have not mastered the art of standing so still that you become invisible to the eye." Everyone just stared at him.
Tony says that he got caught doing a piece for Vanity Fair. He gets onto the plane.
"How do you put up with him?" Fury asked.
"I've learned to, we've known each other for years." Rhodey answered.
Rhodey says that for three hours Tony had him standing there.
Tony, who is already in the plane says that they're waiting on him now and 'lets rock and roll.'
Rhodey glares at Tony. "You're not still mad about that too are you?" Tony asks.
"I'm not mad, I'm indifferent."
"Still mad. Got it."
Rhodey is reading, Tony who is sitting across from him asks what he's reading and calls him Platypus.
"What's a platypus?" Thor asks.
"Perry." Peter sings. Shuri broke out laughing. T'Challa looked confused.
"Its like a mix between a beaver and a duck." Bruce says, answering Thor's question.
"Then why not call it a buck or a deaver?" Thor asked.
"A: There's already an animal called a Buck, it's a male deer. And B: Deaver sounds stupid." Strange said.
Tony calls him sour patch and tells him not to be mad.
"He's allowed to be mad." Natasha said.
"I never said he wasn't." Tony countered.
"It was implied." Maria said.
Rhodey says that he's not mad he's indifferent.
Tony says that he said he was sorry.
A stewardess walks up to them and greets them.
Rhodey says the Tony doesn't need to apologize and that he's his man.
"Apologizes are appreciated though... when I know you mean them." Rhodey added. "We're not just gonna... skate past that."
Tony greets the stewardess and says that he apologized to Rhodey.
Rhodey says that he's indifferent.
The stewardess offers them hot towels.
Rhodey says that Tony doesn't respect himself so he knows Tony doesn't respect him.
Tony says that he respects him.
"I do." Tony said.
Rhodey says that he's just Tony's babysitter.
"That you are colonel." Fury said.
"I honestly think you're the only one capable of keeping him in line, maybe other than pepper." Natasha said.
"You got that right." Clint said.
Rhodey continues by saying when Tony needs his diaper changed to let him know and he'll get him a bottle. The stewardess comes back with hot towels.
Tony asks the stewardess to heat up a sake, and thanks Rhodey for reminding him.
Everyone rolled their eyes. "Are you sure you should be drinking?" Steve asked.
Rhodey protests and tells Tony that they're supposed to be working not drinking.
Tony says that you can't have sashimi without sake.
Rhodey tells him that he is constitutionally incapable of being responsible.
"Right again colonel, two for two." Maria says.
"What is this? Gang up on Tony day?" Tony asked.
"Yes actually. Happens every year, glad you were able to take time out of your busy schedule to make it to this one." Natasha said.
Tony says that it would be irresponsible not to drink.
"I don't think that's how it works." Strange said.
"That's... that's because it's not." Peter said.
Tony finishes his thought by saying that he's just talking about a nightcap.
"It's not night though?" Ned asked.
The stewardess comes back and asks if they would like a hot sake.
Tony says yes and asks for two.
Rhodey says that he's not drinking and he doesn't want any.
"You're gonna end up drinking, aren't you?" Clint asked.
"I honestly don't even know how it happens, he is incredibly persuasive when he wants to be." Rhodey said.
Rhodey and Tony are on a couch both drunk, the stewardess' are dancing. Rhodey says that when he gets up in the morning and puts on his uniform he recognizes that every person with the same uniform has his back.
"Oh my god." Rhodey groans and puts his face in his hands.
"How much did you have?" Quill asks.
"Actually I had more than him." Tony says. "He has an embarrassingly low tolerance."
"Well I'm sorry. We don't all have a glass of scotch with breakfast." Rhodey said.
Tony isn't listening, he's looking at the dancers.
Tony looks at him and says that he's not like Rhodey and he's not cut out- but he gets cut off by Rhodey saying that Tony doesn't have to be like him but he is more than he is.
"That makes no sense." Pepper said.
"If you're drunk it does." Tony corrected.
Tony asks if Rhodey can excuse him for being distracted.
Rhodey says that he can't be distracted.
"Too late for that." Natasha said.
Tony gets off the plane, walks up to the general and greets him.
The general welcomes him and says they're looking forward to his weapons presentation. Tony thanks him.
"Oh boy." Tony groaned.
Tony is giving a speech, he asks if its better to be feared or respected then asks if its too much to ask for both.
"I feel like that just wouldn't work. Like you can have one or the other but you can't have both." MJ said. "Fear breeds compliance. Respect breeds loyalty."
says that with that in mind, he humbly presents the crown jewel of the Stark Industries Freedom Line.
"Contradictory name you got there." Clint said.
'Freedom line?' Steve thought. Doesn't seem very free to him. It seems like the government wants to use these weapons to beat people into submission, but he was born 70 years ago so what does he know.
He says that its the first missile to incorporate their repulsor technology, and and says that people say the best weapons is one that doesn't need to be fired.
"In most cases, that is true." Loki said. "You can do a lot more damage when you cripple them from the inside."
Tony says that he disagrees and he thinks the best weapon is one that only needs to be fired once.
"I mean... it would lessen casualties on one side. The side with the weapon but... doesn't seem all that ethical to me." Scott sa
He says that that's how his dad did it, its how America does it and that its worked well so far.
"That depends on your definition of 'well'." Wanda said.
He finishes by saying to find an excuse to let one of them off the chain and he can guarantee them that the bad guys wont even come out of their caves, then he introduces the Jericho. As he's talking, the missile is fired which results in a large explosion.
"Jesus Christ!" Peter Quill said.
"Oh my god." Gamora said.
"its a good thing you're on our side." Fury said. Maria silently agreed.
"Yeah, I'm not proud of it." Tony said, a guilty look on his face.
Tony walks away and grabs a glass of scotch and says he'll be throwing one of these in with every purchase of five hundred million or more and then makes a toast to peace.
"No, not peace. war." Steve said.
Tony receives a phone call from Obadiah who greets him when he answers.
Tony asks him why he's awake.
Obadiah says that he couldn't sleep until he found out how it went, then asks how it went.
"Asshole!" Pepper shouted.
Tony says it was great and that it looks like it'll be an early Christmas.
Obadiah congratulates him and asks if he'll see him tomorrow.
Pepper, Rhodey, Happy and the SHIELD agents all glared.
Tony asks Obadiah why he isn't wearing the pajamas he bought for him.
Obadiah tells him goodnight, then the call ends.
Tony gets into a hum-vee, Rhodey walks up to him and greets him.
Tony apologizes and says that this was the fun-vee and that the humdrum-vee was behind them.
Rhodey gave the fakest laugh he could muster. "Hilarious."
Rhodey congratulates hum and says he'll see him at the base.
"No you won't." Tony said ominously.
"What do you mean he wont?" Scott asked. He didn't receive an answer.
The next scene is in Tony's first person perspective. He's lying on a bed There are people performing surgery on him. The voices are muffled. Tony is screaming. When they're done they knock him out.
"They did that to you in a cave!?" Strange asked.
"That is inhumane man." Clint said.
"What!? Without putting you to sleep first!?" Bruce asked.
"Yes they did, lets keep watching." Tony says, voice tight.
Tony is now in a bed, awake. He feels the tube in his nose and goes to pull it out. He then tries to grab a glass of water but just ends up knocking it over.
"Oh no." Shuri said.
He pulls at the wires that are coming out of his chest when he turns over.
Yinsen, sitting at the side of the bed tells him that he shouldn't do that.
Tony looks sown at his chest and takes notice to the bandages. He pulls at them, sees the electromagnet and faints.
"What the hell did he do to you?" Scott asked.
"He saved my life." Tony replied.
"Is that why you have the-" Steve unsubtly gestures to his chest. Tony nodded stiffly.
A little while later, he wakes. Tony sits up and asks what Yinsen did to him.
Yinsen says that what he did was to save Tony's life, he tells Tony that he removed all the shrapnel that he could but there is some left and it's headed into his atrial septum and asks if Tony wants to see it. Yinsen holds out a glass bottle with small pieces of metal inside of it.
"That's in your body?" Rocket asked. Tony nodded. "Ouch."
"Who's the man you are with?" Hope asked.
"His name was Yinsen." Tony responded. A few people were confused at the 'was' but dropped the subject.
Yinsen says its a souvenir and tells Tony to take a look, then tosses the bottle to Tony.
"That's a morbid way of looking at it." Bruce said. "'Hey here's a souvenir from the time you almost died so you can always remember it'."
Yinsen says that he's seen wounds like that where he's from and that they're called the walking dead because it takes a week for the shards to reach the vital organs.
"I love the walking dead." Peter said, trying to bring light to the scene. A few people chuckled.
"I do too, but it's not as good as it used to be." Clint said.
"What is the walking dead?" Drax asked.
"It's a TV show." Scott answered.
Tony inquires about the device currently in his chest. Yinsen tells him that its an electromagnet hooked up to a car battery and its what's keeping the shrapnel out of his heart.
"A car battery!?" Bruce and Strange yelled.
Tony looks down and zips up his jacket. He then looks up and notices the camera. Yinsen notices and tells him to smile.
"Okay, but that sounded creepy." Peter said.
Yinsen tells Tony that they've actually met before and that it was at a technical conference in Bern.
Tony says that he doesn't remember.
"Of course you wouldn't." Happy said. He remembered it though. 1999, Tony met a biologist and her weird plant.
Yinsen says that he wouldn't and that if he had been that drunk he wouldn't have been able to stand let alone give a lecture on integrated circuits.
"You gave a speech while intoxicated?" Steve asked.
"Out of all the things you've seen me do so far, that's what surprises you?" Tony asked.
"Actually that's fair, and we haven't even known each other for 2 weeks." Steve said.
"Welcome to our world Rogers." Pepper said.
Tony asks where they are but his question goes unanswered when a commotion is heard outside of their room.
"Yeah, where are you?" Quill asked.
"A cave in Afghanistan, being held captive." Tony answered.
Yinsen rushes over to help him stand, then tells him to stand and to doe as he does and put his hands up.
A man starts talking in Arabic.
Tony notices his guns and asks how did these people get them.
"Is it really that surprising, you built weapons for a living, Stark." Natasha says.
"I was terribly Naïve back then." Tony answers.
"I can tell."
Tony asks what the man is saying. Yinsen translates and tells him that he said welcome Tony Stark the most famous mass murderer in the history of America.
Tony cringed slightly at being called that. There was a time where he might've been proud of the title but... so much has happened and he's glad for it, in a weird way. It gave him the opportunity to try and be a better man than he was.
Yinsen continues translating and tells Tony that he said he is honored and wants Tony to build the Jericho, the missile he demonstrated then he hands Tony a picture.
Tony says he refuses.
"That is not what you say to your captors." Clint shouts.
The scene cuts to Tony being tortured. He is dunked head first into a tub of water. In his head he hears Pepper yell his name Then the car battery shorts.
"You heard me?" Pepper asked. Tony nodded.
"That is a prime example of why you should not say that to your captors." Clint said.
Natasha smacked him. "Not the time, Clint."
The scene now shows the men leading Tony and Yinsen out of the cave, the former has a sack on his head.
"Was the sack really necessary?" Scott asked.
"They didn't want me to know the way out, lucky for me, there's more than one way to figure that out." Tony said.
"Okay, maybe you have more common sense than I gave you credit for but still... don't mouth off to the people who hold your life in their hands." Clint said.
"Unless your trained to do so, then you can mouth off all you want to." Natasha added.
When they reach the outdoors someone takes the sack off of his head. Tony sees that there are a lot of Stark Industries weapons there.
A man starts speaking in a foreign language.
Yinsen translates, telling tony that the man wants to know what he thinks.
Tony says he thinks the have a lot of his weapons.
"Well, you're not wrong." Natasha said.
"How did they get them though?" Scott wondered.
Yinsen translates again, telling Tony that the man says that they have everything he needs to build the Jericho and he wants Tony to make a list of materials and to start working immediately and when he's done they will set them free.
"I don't think he will." Steve said.
"Of course he won't." Bucky said.
Tony says that they wont, Yinsen agrees.
A few people frowned, it was strange to see Tony so hopeless. They found that they didn't like it.
Tony shakes the mans hand.