So this is a shorter chapter but I felt it needed to be covered. I promise in. Few chapters time they will start to get longer.

Please review! They help motivate me to keep writing.

Arizona POV

I stayed awake until my girlfriend had fallen asleep. I've thought about telling her about my nightmares many times, she has told me about her worst days and her darkest thoughts. I have often considered bringing it up but I know my problems are nothing compared to how she suffers on a daily basis. Callie was there when I was at my worst, but there was no way she could have even imagined the pain I was feeling. I'm so much better now than I was, and I hate talking about my past but for Amelia I would. I feel like I owe her an explanation. I close my eyes, still holding onto her sleeping body and rest my head, drifting to sleep.

I wake up at around 8am. Amelia is awake, watching me sleep. She leans it to kiss me, taking my lips in her own.

"Good morning." I yawn, moving my head to rest it on her chest. "Did you manage to get enough sleep?"

"I haven't been awake for long. You look peaceful when your sleep." She tells me and I smile. I love waking up with Amelia in my bed. It doesn't feel right when she isn't here. I feel a strange sort of tension between us. My nightmare being the elephant in the room, the silence begging for me to bring it up

"I meant what I said last night. I will tell you about the plane crash if you want. You have been so open with me and I am definitely not perfect, I have issues too." I try to explain.

"You don't have to tell me, you don't owe me anything. I don't want to cause any problems for you." She tells me, I know she is trying to be nice about it. It's what I did for her. It's strange, it feels like we have swapped roles.

"Amy, it's fine. I can tell you, I just don't know how much you want to know. It's a lot to take in, and it's dark, like really dark and it's not that I mind you knowing. I don't mind, really. I don't want to hurt you, or scare you away."

"You're not going to scare me away, I'm here for the long run." She tells me, I know she isn't going to leave me, that's not what I meant. I just don't want to overwhelm her with information. It's a lot. "Arizona, you can tell me whatever you decide is right."

"How much do you already know?"

"Not much. I know Lexie died, and Mark did once you got back, Your leg, Derek's hand. The basics." She tells me. She knows about the injuries, she knows of the deaths.

"When the plane crashed, I was trapped, the bone of my leg was sticking out. I was screaming, like really loud. I had never felt pain like that. Cristina and and Mark were awake first, Meredith soon after. Mer was screaming because they couldn't find Derek. We could hear a noise so erm, Cristina made me stop screaming so they could follow it. I knew where it was coming from, they followed the sound but I couldn't move. They left me there with the plane. Once they had left I realised the pilot was still there but he was trapped inside, I was focusing so hard on keeping him calm that I kinda forgot about my leg for a while. Mark seemed fine, we were holding it together pretty well. The next thing I know his body was being dragged towards me, He had a tamponade, Meredith and Cristina performed an emergency pericardiocentesis. He wasn't great but he was alive. They told me Lexie had died, I didn't know, I didn't get to see her. Derek managed to find us, I could see his arm was injured but I didn't know what had happened. Honestly he was alive and moving so it wasn't my greatest concern. Jerry, the pilot told me someone should find us within 4 hours. Nobody came. When it got dark, Mark stayed with me. I think Mer, Derek and Cristina were together. Mark basically told me he wanted to die, to be with Lexie. I told him he had to fight, for Sofia, for Callie."

"You don't have to tell me all at once. You can finish another time." Amelia tells me, using her thumbs to dry my tears. I hadn't even realised I was crying.

"I just want to tell you what happened. I'm not going into details right now. Unless you want me to stop?" I add, realising she may not be ready to deal with this.

"It's okay, you can continue if you want. I just miss them, Mark and Derek I mean. I didn't know Lexie that well but she seemed nice."

"She was. She was the best of us. Anyway, Mark kept crashing and Cristina kept bringing him back. It took them 4 days to find us and they had to have us anaesthetised for the plane back. I don't remember much of the other 3 days. They blurred together, just pain and hunger. Mostly pain. They told me I would probably lose my leg, I refused to sign anything. I didn't want to lose it. I basically forced them to do everything possible but then the infection took over. Callie signed the forms to remove it without my consent. I was so angry, for so long, but I got to see my daughter again. Mark died on-"

"October 2nd 2012, I know." She continues. "I remember because it was the day of my friend Pete's funeral. Addison told me." She explains before letting me finish.

"I guess that's the general timeline. I don't really want to go into all the details right now but I'm glad you know about it. You deserve to know." I tell her. I haven't spoken about the events of the plane crash in such a long time. Its strange, I tried to forget but the memories are still there, and they hurt less than they did at first.

"Arizona, can I ask something? You don't have to answer if you don't want to I was just wondering."

"What is it?"

"What was your nightmare about?" This is one of the details I was aiming to avoid, not because it was unimportant but because it is so dark. It's not something you want going around your head. Still, she asked the question so I will answer.

"A sound. Animals, fighting each other. It wasn't until later we realised they were fighting over Lexie, over her body. I can still hear them."

"I'm sorry, I can't begin to imagine what that must have been like."

"It's okay. I'm okay. It's a dark chapter of my life, but it happened. I got through it."

"I'm glad you got through it. I'm so happy you're in my life."

"I'm happy to be here." We stay in that same position, with my head rested on her chest. It's cosy, I like feeling her body against mine. We are warm, and safe.