Mild trigger warning. Because it's really hard to talk about Hojo knowing the fucked-up things he did.

Chapter 51. January 19, εуλ0008

Returning to Midgar was a bittersweet pill. Tifa hadn't thought she ever would. Parachuting in, she'd tried to avert her eyes from the Sector Seven wreckage – like the image wasn't forever emblazoned on her mind - but even as they landed in Sector Eight, charred markings, shattered debris, all the residual signs of the destruction of Mako Reactor One – were enough to remind her of what she had helped begin.¶¶She looked alternately between Barret and Cloud, both busy conferring with Cait to find a way into the underground. Cait – REEVE – so worried about the people of Midgar. Those secret tunnels where they'd once scurried like rats, convinced forward by the passion of their cause. She'd changed so much, so fast since then, and it left her with a lingering sense of guilt and shame - was any of it worth it?

Her eyes lingered on Cloud. The TRUE Cloud, the genuine, awkward self she'd come to understand and love. It reminded her… despite it all, there was happiness to be found even after sorrow, the two vacillating back and forth in the cycle known as life.

And life meant… you just had to keep living.

Barret tried roughly to push down his own repugnant reactions, to focus on the matter at hand – but it wouldn't escape him. Had it been such a short time ago he'd been here pontificating on the need for sacrifice? Aerith. If that wasn't the sacrifice that had hurt them most of all… somehow more than all those anonymous lives put together. The only pain he'd experienced anything near it was his panic at the thought that Marlene was gone, countered by the unbelievable exhilaration at the knowledge she was safe.

But all those nameless others… here, with his experiences since choking him until he could hardly breathe, be realized what an ass of a leader he'd been. Why AVALANCHE had kicked him out in the first place. His black and white world was collapsing into grayscale, and he had no precedent to understand it.

"Hurry!" Cait urged them, breaking into his thoughts. "It won't be safe here for long. We've got to make our way through the underground. It's the only way!" Nanaki was already shrinking his shoulders and hindquarters, crawling into the interplate Cait pointed them to. Cloud itched with urgency. Reeve, so you've come around to understand? He wondered where the real man was now, the one he'd only glimpsed the one time from a vent above the Shinra conference room. If Shinra collapsed, what might happen to him? The one voice of humanity he'd seen in the company?¶¶But one thing Cloud knew. Reeve was the one who had truly built Midgar, and now he was doing what he can to protect the city into which he'd put so much energy and love. For that, Cloud would do this.

Cait urged them into the underground, and Tifa felt the stench coming up to greet her – a pollution that she'd become so accustomed to that it almost felt nostalgic, but now it turned her stomach. Still, as they hustled through tomb-silent train corridors, a different sort of memory revisited her – the trip to Reactor Five, and the events it had set in motion.

Her tumble from the train with Cloud wrapping her in his own body to protect her, an unexpected intimacy that had left her flushed and breathless from the press of his body so close. A memory of touch that had left her aching for more. She snuck a glance at Cloud again, her heart feeling that gentle twinge of softness she'd felt from him from the start – that she'd always known he had within.

They'd been traveling through the winding tunnels as rapidly as they could, their every footstep echoing eerily in the empty corridors, trains no longer running. That, in and of itself, said something about the urgency of the situation. Midgar was on high alert.

A rustle down the corridor grabbed her attention, notable in the void of silence that surrounded them – but as three figures rounded the corner, she had no doubt indeed that they had intended to be heard.

Cloud tensed, wondering who else could have a reason to enter these steel walls. Familiar faces came sauntering down the tunnels. The new one – Elena? Rude – Tifa could hardly tell behind his eternal sunglasses, but it seemed he snuck a glance at her and hurriedly averted his eyes, a thought that brought her the faintest blush of embarrassment, followed by irritation with herself for even being bothered by such a small thing, when far more important things were at stake.

"Turks," Cloud half-spat.

"You bet!" the blonde – Elena? – shouted, half leaping forward, only Rude's strong hand on her shoulder holding her back. "No, Elena. Now's not the time."

The redhead faced Cloud squarely on. "Always a Turk," Reno continued. "But it's not looking like the Turks are part of Shinra anymore."

"Then what the hell are you doing here?" demanded Barret.

"It's our job to fight these guys!" Elena half-insisted, half-pleaded, but it seemed Rude and Reno were simply ignoring her.

"Anyways," Reno continued, sharply glaring at Elena, "we have more important problems now. Something good for a change. "Tseng ordered us to help evacuate Midgar."

"That bad, huh?" asked Barret.

"I suspect the order came from somewhere even above Tseng," Vincent mused, looking pointedly at Cait. The cat chose not to respond.

"But I could ask you the same thing," Reno addressed Cloud. "Why are all of you guys here? What possible purpose could you achieve? The Sister Ray cannon's been fired. The barrier around the Northern Crater is gone. I'd thought you'd be going that way. Are you back to try and get rid of Shinra? Well, I have some news for you. It's already gone. You must have seen the attack on the Shinra building?" Reno asked.

Cloud nodded; they'd seen the huge explosion from the Highwind, the counterattack from Diamond Weapon, the blast that had exploded with enough force to go all the way to the Northern Crater; once again, Cloud wondered if the way was now open. If the confrontation was now inevitable. He could practically taste Sephiroth waiting for him, salivating for the rematch. "Well – Rufus was in the office. You saw. There was no possible way he could have survived it."

That was a surprise. Rufus…. Gone? Somehow that bothered Cloud in a way he couldn't put his finger on. A touch, even, of regret? He certainly had no love lost for the man, but somehow the loss of Shinra's President... left a gaping hole. A knot of desire for not even revenge, but mere conclusion, that now was never to be resolved.

The reign of the elder Shinra over. Somehow, the idea seemed uncertain, frightening. The prospect of a whole new world to shape…

"We've got our mission here, too," Cloud told them. "Hojo is the one directing things now. He's pulling all of Midgar's power to the same place, and we don't know why. He could destroy the city before Meteor even has a chance." He paused. "I hope you can get everyone out in time. And I mean that."

Reno nodded; Elena pouted. Rude, as usual, showed nothing. "Then let's both get on with our business," he said. "We've worked on the same side again. Maybe one of these days we'll find ourselves allies after all."

Vincent stepped forward. "May I stay to help you?" he requested. He turned to Cloud. "I think I can be of some service here and still destroy Sephiroth. Once our own business with Hojo is complete, of course."

Reno looked puzzled. "Why would you want to do that?"

Vincent gestured with a flourish. "Because once, I was a Turk too," he announced. "My name is Vincent Valentine."

Reno's jaw openly dropped; Elena's eyes grew wide; even Rude straightened respectfully. "A legend," Reno said in awe. "But… how? That was years ago. Before I was even born."

"No matter," Vincent replied. "That is my own concern."

"Well…" Reno rubbed his chin with his hand. "I've heard stranger things. We'd be honored to have your help."

Surprisingly, Yuffie spoke up too. "Can I, uh, help too?" She turned to Tifa and Barret, wearing identical looks of confusion. "I think it's just something I gotta do. Same as Tifa had to stay with Cloud in Mideel. I saw how my own hometown got destroyed. I mean, thought I wanted to see this city gone too. But now that it seems like it actually might happen, suddenly it doesn't seem right anymore…" She trailed off. "Well you guys know what I mean, right?"

Cid spoke first. "Kid, you're alright," he told her. "Do what you gotta do. But first let's see what we can do to stop this city from being destroyed, huh? Shame if we went after Sephiroth only to let that dickwad Hojo do the job instead."

"It makes perfect sense," Tifa soothed. "Once we're done with Hojo, you guys can get this city cleared as quickly as possible. We should be able to rejoin before we go to the Northern Crater."

"Anyone else?" asked Cloud, looking at each one in turn. Barret, Tifa, he already knew the answer to. But he was reassured by Cid's grumbling of the name "Shinra" in between a string of curses, and Nanaki's more graceful nod. "I have a score to settle with Hojo, too."

"Then it's settled," Cloud said. "Let's not waste any more time here."

Kunsel ran through the streets of Sector Four, towards the assigned meeting place. Scarlet and Heidegger had tried to hold SOLDIER back; but they'd been distracted with their mechanical toys and their juvenile desire to defeat Cloud. Last he'd heard, the machine had been destroyed.

Kunsel dearly hoped the two heartless directors had been killed along with it.

He'd heard Cloud and his group were in the city. Aerith, are you with them? He wondered. Or are you safe somewhere, maybe with your mom, maybe with Marlene?

Did you finally escape Shinra? The way Zack never did?

He didn't know if he would ever find out.

Rounding the corner, he recognized one face at once, followed by a whole group in similar attire…. Faces that looked like they might be vaguely familiar, but…it would have had to have been years…

But if any group could remain hidden for as long as they liked, it was this one.

He addressed the small woman in front. "Cissnei," he told her. "I didn't expect you to be my contact. Haven't heard from you in a while."

Cissnei shrugged. "We're pulling in everyone for this."

"Tseng's orders?" Kunsel wondered. Tseng had always been difficult for Kunsel to read, but once upon a time Zack had trusted the man. Trusted him with Aerith. Trusted him to allow Zack and Cloud to escape.

And he remembered… Tseng had tried to reach Zack in the end. To get him out alive, and had he only reached him in time, Kunsel was certain Tseng could have found a way… Sent Zack somewhere no one could find him. Faked his death. All the furtive things Turks knew how to do.

But Tseng hadn't made it in time, leaving the army to butcher one of their finest heroes and abandoning him in a pool of his own blood outside Midgar. Kunsel's own blood boiled at the thought. The only reason he hadn't abandoned Shinra himself was his hope to find some sort of redemption, some meaning to Zack's death. To keep his promise to Zack, to watch over Aerith. And perhaps one day to find the child Zack had never known he had.

"This goes above Tseng," Cissnei interrupted his thoughts. Kunsel had no doubt deep inside she was also seeking revenge for Zack, in her own way. Someday, it would come. "We are not working as Shinra. We're being what we are – we're Turks."

She gestured to an older man, care-worn lines; Kunsel noted idly he had a prosthetic arm. "This is Tseng's boss. Our commander, Veld. He's returned."

Vincent's hatred was surging, despite his best efforts to control it. Hojo stirring up a commotion yet again, after all these years. A score he had to settle for Lucrecia, and the son that might be his, and here he had to defeat him – a devil's bargain. Another sin of pain he would have to atone for - for Sephiroth, for Lucrecia, even for himself. For his failures to act like a man and do what needed to be done.

He wished he'd killed Hojo when he had his chance, that fatal pause on the trigger for the man Lucrecia chose over him. For reasons that could be intellectually explained, but deep in his heart never made sense. For a chance to give her unborn child a better future? Was it worth the risk, when she could have simply raised a son in peace?

Then again, had Shinra given her the option?

Maybe it had been his destiny NOT to kill Hojo then? If destiny was just an inevitable result of a sum total of coincidences as they thought – was this the way things were meant to work out after all? To face the man one again, this place, this day?

Or was destiny perhaps the will of the Planet itself? Aerith… might have been able to answer that. Once again, he wished he'd had a chance to get to know the young woman better. Should he have stopped her from going to Sephiroth alone? Should he have maybe gone with her? Tormented by the results of a choice not made, a road not taken.

His only consolation – if he was crass enough to call it that- was that Cloud bore a heavier burden than he for the terms of Aerith's demise.

She'd struck him as so innocent and free compared to his heavy burdens; but now, he understood, the one she shouldered had been the heaviest of them all. It always had been.

He snuck a glance at Cloud. Cloud was bearing himself as stoically as Vincent himself, but he could see the same grim reflection in his features. The tension as they prepared to face the man who had so fundamentally changed the, Taking their bodies, raking, more modeling to his own mad whims, a rape of their wholes. And Vincent wondered – had any of THAT struck Cloud yet, that part of his humanity had been stripped away.

So much of himself he saw reflected in that younger man, pain upon pain piling like stones. Would it turn him bitter and cold like Vincent himself, or would he find his way out of bitter and anger? Would it one day crush him, or would he find the strength to go on? Cloud, it's not too late for you, he thought. You have someone who will always help you find your way when you're lost.

Only time would tell.

The stairs went on; the top grew closer. He still bore himself well, but inwardly he shamefully cringed, a fear inside that he had been tending for far too long. Step by excruciating step, he forced himself to ascend, knowing what was at the top. The thoughts carried themselves in his head when the object of his hatred came into view.

HOJO.

The madman cackled over the controls he gleefully manipulated, the mainframe to the Mako flow of Midgar's veins, so engrossed in his work that at first he didn't notice the new arrivals coming up behind him. That is, until with a whoosh, Cloud whipped his sword forward, poised and ready, the anger now barely concealed as he slipped into stance with the tension of a coiled spring desperately needing release.

At that, the scientist turned, wrinkled cruel eyes magnified behind his glasses. "The failure arrives," he said, unimpressed. "I suppose it's not so surprising after all."

Cloud's hands tensed on his sword, his emotions instinctively responding as he fought the urge to speak. I'm not a failure, he reminded himself. Tifa; Tifa had been there to show him that, the two of them together in the depths of the Lifestream, a shared experience that had irrevocably changed them both. He knew now, whatever else had happened in his life – he hadn't failed at the one thing that mattered most to him.

The promise he had made.

But that didn't mean he didn't owe a debt of a different sort to Hojo.

"My name is CLOUD," he half-shouted. "And I am myself, not a creation of yours."

Vincent's finger itched on the trigger of his gun, to the shot he should have fired so long ago. How much might have changed had Hojo not made the first move that day. "What do you think you are doing?" Vincent asked, surprised at the composure in his own voice.

Hojo met him eye to eye; the "scientist's" gaze sickened him. Lucrecia, how could you? he wondered once again; there was no trace of warmth or humanity in that man's eyes. "It's very simple," Hojo said, impervious. "I'm sending as much energy as I can to my son."

"Even if it means destroying Midgar?" Cloud asked beside him, cold SOLDIER anger now coursing through his veins.

"A small price," Hojo scorned. "They dropped the plate without much thought. Do you think the city itself is worth that much more?"

Vincent's mind was leaning to other possibilities. Sephiroth, the man Hojo believed was his son… but Vincent had been carrying his own secrets. Lucrecia had never confirmed it outright… but in his heart, Vincent knew. The way only a father can.

Sephiroth, another man used and abused by Hojo since birth. And now, the only thing Vincent could do to atone to Lucrecia – he finally understood – was to destroy the creature Hojo had made of his lover's own child.

A sin, again and again. Piled upon another, every chance to atone bringing with it a new burden – weights Vincent knew could never be lifted. He'd stopped even trying.

There was no forgiveness. He knew that now. there was only what needed to be done.

"I can't believe you would do such a thing. Your own son?" roared Cloud.

"Do what? Give him the privilege of being special, something better, something more?" Hojo smirked then, a sick parody of an expression. "I give the privilege to all. In fact I've even injected myself. An extremely high dose. In fact –" here he looked at a wrist that bore no watch, a mere formality – "I think it's going into effect about… now."

On cue, right before their eyes, Hojo simply…melted… into something horrible, hellish. A true reflection of the man inside.

Vincent sensed Cloud by his side, the others behind, ready to back them up. But it was the two men. Vincent braced, readying himself.

Rest in peace, Hojo, he thought to himself. Undeserved, but the final gift he could give to the woman he'd loved.

Then he fired.

The cannon had been disabled. Shinra was finished. Midgar was being evacuated, for whatever good that might do.

Meteor still hung in the sky.

Cloud wondered. Time was short, and chances were few to see the people they wanted to see, to tell them how they felt. A last few words that might let them die in peace if the worst was to come. Hojo was gone, but Sephiroth was still there. Waiting.

He hated to think they might fail, but he couldn't deny the possibility.

The assembled group was looking to him…. Time to step up and be the leader they'd trusted him to be. He knew now. It didn't matter if he was qualified or not – he had to do it anyway.

"Before we get to the Northern Crater," he began. "I want to ask you. Every one of you. Remember what you are fighting for so we can go in armed with those memories and their power." He paused. "Aerith…. I think it's what she would have wanted. She knew most of all what she was fighting for."

He took another deep breath before moving on. "So… I'm going to ask you to do something that might be hard. Maybe not. Let's do what Bugenhagen said, and take a good long look what's in our hearts. Let's all take this little bit of time that's left. Let's remember who and what matters most."

Everyone was silent for a moment, but he could practically read their thoughts, their emotions plain; he could tabulate who was important to each and every one of his friends gathered here. Thinking on what he had said.

"But what then?" Cid finally asked, doubtful.

Cloud was afraid, deep inside, for reasons he wasn't sure of. Or… maybe he was. "Then… we go after Sephiroth. What happens then… we can only do our best, and hope."

Author's Note: Yes, I am firmly a fan of the Vincent-is-Sephiroth's-father theory. I sort of thought it the first time I played OG, even though I didn't quite follow the timeline. Mostly because I am so grossed out that ANYONE would do it with Hojo, even once.