Chapter 77. εуλ0011

Tifa was in a state of bliss. Cooing over the baby in her arms, her smile, her laughter – music to his ears as she lovingly cuddled Cid Jr.

The baby had been fussing, and a frustrated new father had handed off his son to the nearest female. Tifa had quickly worked her magic., and the baby was now falling asleep in her arms

She looked so natural, so beautiful. Tifa was made to be a mother – look how well she'd done with Marlene and Denzel. Still, far better than he, Cloud, was doing though he was getting a bit better with time.

"Shera is much better at this," Cid lamented.

"Shera needs her rest," Tifa reminded him gently. They'd left Cid's wife on the airship for some much-needed sleep. "Especially if you're already planning on a second."

Cid grunted. "I need a cigarette.

"How's that going, by the way?" Cloud asked. "Quitting smoking?"

"It's a bitch, but I gotta do it. Shera refused to let our kids grow up in a smoky house."

"That sounds reasonable," Tifa soothed.

"I guess." Cid waved a hand dismissively. "But seriously, you have no idea how hard it is to be with that woman! She controls everything – the kitchen, the house, the bills – and you should see how cranky she gets if she doesn't fucking get fucked every day – "

Cloud and Tifa looked at each other in mutual shock. Did he just say…

Cid caught their look and paused. "What?" he asked suspiciously.

"Nothing," said Cloud.

"Nothing," echoed Tifa.

Their friends were branching out. Expanding, and not just their families. The WRO was becoming a formidable force; with Cid, Yuffie already attached to the organization, and Vincent and Barret considering at least an affiliation as well, Cloud was wondering if it was time to consider Reeve's offer.

He hated the idea of sitting behind a desk; but Reeve continued to assure him he could create his own position. "Supply lines, Cloud," Reeve had suggested. "Take what you've done with the delivery service, help us expand it to a higher scale. You can still be out on the road as much as you want."

Cloud couldn't deny the idea was increasingly appealing. A stable income. More time with his family. The things that mattered to him now.

To Tifa, too, Reeve had made an offer. Something to do with children, education; something that would keep her close to home the way she wanted.

In the meantime, Tifa was considering an expansion – a sequel, of sorts, to Seventh Heaven. The new establishment was tentatively named Second Chances. "A place with a feeling of freedom," she explained dreamily, "now what the world is getting used to being peaceful again. A patio. Keep a simple menu, like sandwiches and salads – " Tifa was already envisioning the possibilities as produce became more readily available – "and make it about atmosphere. A fresh start."

Cloud suspected the only real holdup was that Tifa would need to hire help; relinquish some of the customer involvement she so treasured. It was hard, creating relationships outside the family – some secrets still stayed under the roof. Tifa needed female friends; Shera, Yuffie were beginning to fill the space left by Aerith and Jessie. But would that be enough?

For himself, he was content with what he had; all he really had outside the family he so treasured were casual acquaintances. And, of course, the lifelong group of friends that had formed on their journey.

"It'd love to try fine dining, some fancy stuff, things the only used to have on the plate – " here she'd looked at him with joyous excitement in her eyes – "but I just can't get those kind of supplies yet. And people can't afford it." She sighed. "But it's still my dream."

Cloud dreamed, too. Sometimes. Most of the time he was happy with the way things were – the luxury of mundane problems. Of moving through the everyday. He and Tifa were enow an established couple, and it felt sometimes so unbelievable to be on the other side of something he had hoped for so long.

Four years past Meteorfall… but there was still that part of him that itched to be a hero.

A hero… for Tifa. His dreams were so much about wanting to make her happy. And as he watched her holding the now-peaceful baby in her arms, he wondered…

Marlene and Denzel never ran out of energy; Marlene had always been like that, and Denzel seemed to be making up for lost time. Cloud supposed he must have been like that at some point himself – he'd had mountains and forests to play in, they had asphalt and rusted girders – but in the end, wasn't it all the same? Children took what they were given, and made it their own.

Today, for some reason, they were trying to work off all that energy inside. Theoretically, they were helping Tifa clean, while Cloud sat in front of pages of figures at the booth – he'd promised Tifa he'd at least TRY to balance his own books, but he kept getting distracted by their antics.

Tifa bore it all with good humor. Seemed she wasn't doing much of the chores herself, preferring to play and laugh with the children, the same energy she herself had had at a little girl coming out.

He supposed, if Nibelheim had never happened (and he'd been lucky enough to get her to notice him!) they might have had a life together that looked a little bit like… this. Kids would be younger. They'd probably already have one; Tifa might have been already pregnant with a second.

Would his OWN mother have approved? Of what they were now? Probably. There were certain ways Tifa reminded him of Claudia – her vibrancy, her easy comfort with the family and her obvious pride in them… her spirit that was never lost.

Mom, I remember everything you taught me. The best way he could honor her memory… was by paying it forward.

However it had come to pass, he was charmed by this new life of his. He'd been so in love with her in a teenage way – but now, they were a man and a woman, teenagers no more. The adolescent he'd been could never have understood how this would really, truly feel.

Those feelings, those seeds, had blossomed into something so much more wonderful. The whole fatherhood thing – Hades, he'd stopped trying to figure it all out. Barret seemed to just make it up as he went along, And Cid was a complete wreck right now, so Cloud supposed he himself wasn't doing all that bad. But still…

He'd lost track of how long he'd simply been staring. She was born to be a mother. The sentiment had been echoing in his head since seeing her with Shera's and Cid's baby; but a new thought hit him, warm and true and completely formed.

I want you to be the mother of my children.

It took him by surprise. He'd been slowly navigating every step of the way – the challenge of being the man Tifa needed. Treading so carefully that he was only starting to understand what they could really have together, the ways time would make it so. In the midst the thought had never occurred to him before – but suddenly, it was overwhelming. He wanted her to have the chance to give birth to a baby of their own, something that had grown inside of her… but until now, it had never really occurred to him that those babies might be his too.

He found himself gazing at her, hungry with his wish. A wish that now seemed in the realm of possibility. This could actually happen. They had come so far together – Could he really go further, be a father to their child?

What would it feel like to make love to her knowing that they might be making a baby? To see her carrying his child… to be by her side when a new life appeared, one they had created together.

She'd played so many different roles in his life – and he kept dreaming of the next, and the next after that. And he knew for certain… sooner or later, Tifa would want a baby. She always had.

But could HE? Should he? Could he even conceive at all – had SOLDIERs ever had children, families, or was that another cost of Mako enhancements? And even if he was fertile, would the baby be healthy? Would Tifa? Would she even want a baby with him when they couldn't be certain of the risks? And would he risk either Tifa or their child for his own selfish desire?

He knew Tifa wanted a baby. He didn't know if she wanted HIS. And he wanted what sort of compromise he'd be willing to make when that time came.

Would he consider letting her have a baby by another man? He shuddered with the idea, but he had to think of her, too. How far would he go for love?

Tifa looked up, and realized Cloud was staring at her. For how long, she couldn't say. But the look in his eyes – it was a rampant, desperate longing, a look she hadn't seen on him before.

Concerned, she gently brushed back Marlene's hair from her eyes, murmuring to her to go blow off some steam outside. Marlene didn't need much encouragement; and reticent Denzel was content to let her lead. Their tandem steps clattered outside, leaving Tifa alone with Cloud in the now-silent bar.

She approached him cautiously. Sometimes, these moods of his were still a mystery. "Cloud," she asked awkwardly. "What's wrong?"

He didn't shy away, but that pained expression never left his face. His answer, when it came, surprised her.

"Tifa… do I make you happy?"

Of course you do, don't be silly, was the first thing she wanted to say. But deflection had hardly served her in the past. He still had doubts in himself; still had trouble inviting happiness into his life. Doubts that were so fundamentally a part of him, that they'd become part of what she loved.

"Cloud… what's this really about?" she asked him, tucking her legs underneath her to sit on the freshly cleaned floor.

Some of the urgency was gone, but Cloud's expression was still strained. "I still worry… what if I screw things up? What if I don't get it right?"

"It takes time," she told him tenderly. How much he wanted to please her, her hard it was still for him to receive back. Did she truly appreciate how hard he was on himself? "Cloud, we have no idea what will happen."

"I just feel some days like I'm so surprised it's real. Like suddenly this is all going to disappear." He waved a hand for emphasis. "Not like I'm still trapped in the mansion somewhere- " Tifa let out a breath didn't know she was holding; THAT fear, at least, seemed to have receded to the stuff of forgetfulness rather than nightmares – "but that you're really with me. That we have this life together."

"I hope it's getting a little easier." That those moments were coming a little less often. She was both pleased and bewildered that somehow she'd become so important to him; yet she was, and that meant there was really only one thing she could say.

"Cloud… do you trust me?"

He answered as expected. "You have to ask?" He reached to caress her face, a gesture that always gave her shivers. "The question is, Tifa, do you trust ME?"

"With my life." As she had; as he had, too. As they both knew.

Cloud sighed. "I guess… I have a hard time figuring out how you fell in love with me." He shrugged. "It's confusing. Discontinuous. I mean, one day, I was wondering if you'd ever thought twice about me, what I had to do to get your attention… and then there's this woman with me, and for whatever reason she loves me. Enough to put up with my shit. And my stupid mood swings. "He defused with a laugh.

But Tifa knew – it was a legitimate question. The hurt was real. Real, and his heart needed to be handled with the greatest of care; she paused for a long time, plotting her answer. "I don't entirely get it either," she admitted. "I was so naïve when I was younger. I'm such a different person now."

"To me, you're always the same. Always perfect." She smiled at his interruption; but there was more she had to tell him.

"- but somewhere along the way, I just grew into the idea. I can't tell you exactly when." It could have been so many moments along the way. When he promised to save her; when he left; when she thought he hadn't come – when he finally DID come back. "I had so much time to build up my fantasy of you… years that I thought you were gone for good…then when I found you again… I wasn't sure, some of it matched, some of it didn't. I didn't even know WHAT to call what I was feeling. Then later, when I realized you WERE everything I had hoped for…" When the Cloud that was truly HIM came back from the Lifestream. "I had so little time to take it all in. I was just sure we would be struggling together." When he came back from an explosion on top of the Shinra building, when he came back home to HER. Any, all of the above, a continuous flow like the Lifestream itself. "Maybe you were ahead of me that way. Maybe because you had it harder as a kid. You GOT it so much sooner. All I can tell you is that even if I don't get it, I know I grew to love you and need you and now you're someone I can't live without."

He did smile then; not all of that strange longing was gone, but the pain had visibly subsided. "I think I'm understanding, little by little," he told her. "It gets easier to believe. But sometimes – I feel like pain has been so much a part of my life… I don't know if I can ever work things out completely," he admitted.

"Then don't fight it. Just keep on living and let it die a slow death on its own," she suggested, rising to her feet. He pulled her in for a sweet kiss, his simple way of saying thank you; she brushed her fingers down his arm, finishing with a squeeze of his hand in hers, before returning to her work and leaving him to think.

So Cloud thought. About creating a life with her – in a different, literal sense. A life she'd care for, for the rest of her own life; and for his, if she would let him.

That was the problem. He KNEW that he'd committed his life to her – but somehow even that didn't feel like enough.

He shuffled his papers into a neat stack, returning them to their reserved cubbyhole near the end of the bar. He certainly wasn't in a frame of mind to think about numbers anymore this afternoon. He gave a friendly wave to Tifa, just to let her know he wouldn't be gone long, and stepped outside the bar into the sunlight. It seemed brighter today.

Hand on the doorframe, he turned with a final look at her. "You make me feel alive," he told her, and left.

His last words shot her in the heart, as Tifa watched him go out the door, leaving her to mull over their conversation. The worst of his dusky mood was over, but she knew him when he was like this. He would need her physically tonight. Times like these, he needed her most of all – yet was most afraid to ask.

Tapping her fingers on the counter, Tifa began to plan. She had that little surprise he hadn't seen yet – she'd bartered for this one, a lacy red two piece with stockings the woman had sewn herself… in exchange for dinner for her and her five children, letting the kids greedily gobble up everything they could.

"How do you think I GOT five kids?" the woman laughed, handing it over. Tifa didn't even try to figure out the price. If it worked for Cloud, especially tonight… it was worth it.

Cloud came in from taking out the trash, stopping himself from instinctively wiping his hands on his pants. Boring chores were kind of a relief, and certainly no worse than a lot of mess he'd had to put up with in the army. He was used to being on the road, another dirty business, but Tifa was firm about him washing up before he came to their bed.

He scrubbed his hands, splashing some water on his face, scuffing up his hair as if it made any sort of difference. Ingrained habit more than anything else, a signal to head upstairs for more pleasurable company.

Tifa… she was on his mind. Really, how often was she NOT on his mind? But today, a conversation so much more potent than usual, latent with possibilities. He'd left Seventh Heaven for a long ride on Fenrir, giant circles around what used to be Midgar; and while he initially felt better, eventually he was more confused than ever. And confused meant anxious, which bred…

He opened the door, and completely forgot the rest of his thought.

Tifa awaited him, wearing some shiny red… Thing. Yeah. That was it. There were laces and bows and what was that see-through stuff called, mesh?

Who cared? He was having trouble thinking straight.

Tifa smiled. Exactly the effect she'd been hoping for. Rising from the bed, where she'd patiently arranged herself as soon as she heard him coming in, she closed the distance between him to greet him with kisses slow and deep. His response was intermediate, and parting her legs slightly, she ground firmly into him for encouragement.

He groaned. Fuck, he needed her. His hands instinctively grabbed her buttocks, finding ribbons at her hips. Bows? One small pull, and panties would be sliding right to the floor. He wasn't sure if he should unwrap her quite so soon.

Tifa's voice was languorous, seductive in his ears. "What's stopping you?"

He buried his head in her shoulder. Not much, was the truthful answer. "Tifa," he said, her name flustering his thoughts, "I don't want to ever feel like I'm just using you."

She pulled her head back, hands on his cheeks, forcing him to face her. "Cloud," she returned, "do you ever think I might enjoy fulfilling your desires?"

Not much. A lot. Cloud didn't know which one was the answer.

"You know we have next weekend to ourselves," she continued. He nodded. How could he forget? "I have an assignment for you. I want you to think of something you'd like to do, that you're not sure I would be into." Several possibilities immediately sprang to mind. "If it's something I really don't want to do, I'll let you know, but I promise I won't make you feel ashamed for asking."

He fell in love with her just a little bit more. That she might even consider… "But for now," she finished, "I'm going to show you exactly how happy you make me."

She dropped to her knees, expertly divesting him of the bottom half of his clothing, letting his pants drop around his ankles. She took him gently into her mouth, deep and firm. He caressed her head, fingering long silky hair, as he groaned in rapture. Sooo good.

Tifa sucked him as hard as she could; even as big as he was, she tried to get a little further, a little deeper every time - after he 'd confessed how much he enjoyed seeing her lips around him, taking as much as she could. For Cloud's part, he was willing to go along with whatever she was okay with. She enjoyed finishing him off, swallowing his essence, but she'd made it clear she hated the idea of Cloud uh… splattering anywhere else.

Pulling on him deeper and harder, her hand helped out, her tongue flicking the underside, the head. She felt herself growing excited, and knowing he was watching, she slid her hand between her own legs.

He groaned even louder. The kids, she worried briefly – before he climaxed nearly an instant after. He slumped, empty, letting her catch him and pull him towards bed.

Even halfway to sleep, he tried to slide downward, return the pleasure, but Tifa had meant what she'd said. She wanted him to be selfish this night, let him be pampered for once, too. And she'd been right, she realized, he needed this as he sidled flush against her and fell like a baby into sleep.

Days off without the children were precious; as much as she loved them, sometimes she just needed a break.

Not to mention, the time alone with Cloud.

Cloud didn't have to work much nowadays, able to pick and choose the most profitable deliveries – particularly with the local service largely being superseded by the WRO's developing system. He'd still do the deliveries of healing water without quibble, but there were fewer and fewer of those, until it had been months without even a one. It seemed Geostigma was, at long last, wiped from the Planet, no new cases and all living members now cured.

With one of those most important survivors right in front of her.

She told him as much as he nursed a beer in front of her. She'd been thinking of bringing on help, in case she wanted to open the bar on her days off, but today she'd wanted the building completely empty.

Still, it seemed her work was never done; she would open tomorrow daytime, and Barret would bring the kids back tomorrow afternoon. She couldn't relax without performing a little of her preparations for the next day.

Cloud set down his drink, coming around to her side of the bar, helping her dry and restock the remaining glassware. They worked together in quiet tandem, for a while clinks of glass the soundtrack to their silent, comfortable companionship.

"Do you miss me when I'm gone?" Cloud finally said, breaking the silence.

"Of course," she replied automatically, focused on her task.

His arms slid around her waist from behind, pulling her from the sink. "Do you think of me when I'm gone?" he asked, trailing feathery kisses down her neck. Promises of what he would do to her later.

"That too," she replied, feeling a familiar tingling beginning.

His hands caressed her belly, suddenly gripping tighter. "Do you do… other things when you think of me?"

She turned her head to see the telltale mako glow of excitement lighting up his eyes. "Maybe," she murmured, feeling herself blush, thinking of nights left alone, her own furtive touch keeping her company until she could feel him once again…

He didn't let her go, his kisses turning into little bites, relentless. "Would you show me those… other things?" he rasped into her ear. She could feel his hips, his ready erection already grinding against her.

Well. She'd set him the challenge, hadn't she? She'd expected him to surprise her later tonight, but … now was as a good a time as any. And thought she was a bit self -conscious, she was shyly willing – well, more than willing – to provide this request. "I might," she told him, her voice smoky, "if you're a good boy and sit on your side of the bar while I finish my work first."

He let her go, and she didn't need to turn around to feel his boyish smirk; a kid who knew he was getting candy later. She did her best to ignore him. "We start now, then. I'm already pretending you're not here." She dropped her head.

The swish of liquid as he drank was her only answer.

She deliberately worked extra slowly, extending both his anticipation and hers. When she felt she'd tortured him enough, she turned to go. Her own excitement was rising as well, and she wondered how long she was going to hold out. She headed up the stairs and into their bedroom, hearing him follow behind. The door shut, and she heard him settle into the chair in the corner.

Well, if he wanted to see what she did when she was alone, she'd make sure he'd see all of it. She turned on the shower, dropping all her clothes to the floor and allowing him to see just the outline of her naked body. She kept the door open but closed the curtain, giving him the blurred outline of her form.

Cloud found himself growing impatient, stopping himself from reaching for his cock too soon; he felt too privileged and trusted to see this, that he would waste it by coming too soon. The best part of the show was still to come.

She came out wrapped n a towel, teasing him with just enough skin, then offering him a full glance of her glorious nudity before pulling on one of her growing collection of lacy nightgowns. Peach this time he noted, the innocence of the color an extra boost to his already raging libido. She leaned back, settling herself comfortably against the pillows and partway turning back the blankets.

She stretched for the phone, pressing one button for a speed-dialed number, and he heard his own phone distantly ringing from where he'd left it in the bar downstairs. She still made most of the goodnight calls, though he was getting better at doing his share. "Cloud," she began sweetly, one finger tracing her neckline, stopping briefly at her cleavage. "I just called to tell you goodnight and that I love you." Their standard evening words to each other.

Cloud groaned deeply. Weeks from now, when he was in the middle of nowhere, he would be able to listen to that message and picture THIS scene. That vixen.

Not that he was actually complaining, as she hung up and leaned back, splaying out her hair loosely as it was when he was on top of her. Sooo sexy. He DID reach for himself then, only teasing with fingertips, still focused on the scene in front of him.

She mmmed, a long, low sound, rolling her head back. The hand at her breast continued to frolic, and Cloud gasped as she reached below the fabric to tickle one nipple. As if that wasn't enough, her other hand began to skim the surface of the fabric, trailing vertically downward until she met the intersection of her still-closed legs, caressing her mound over the silk.

Shit. This is really what she does? He hoped dearly she thought of him when she did.

She answered the question for him. Breaths low and deep, she exhaled his name, a long drawn-out syllable. "Clooooouud…."

Tifa knew he was there, in the shadows of the corner, but she was trying as hard as she could to ignore him without neglecting her performance. She wanted the right balance, turning him on without overdoing it, wanted to preserve that aura of secrecy, that sense of looking into the forbidden that she knew he desired. The simplest way was just to softly voice the fantasies that ordinarily ran through her head. "Cloud," she repeated. "Mmm, I love the way you touch me, Cloud."

She copied his most familiar touches, the ones he'd learned so well, the ones she liked so much. Still covered, she parted her legs slightly, one finger traveling down to stroke her clit; the silk texture on her nub was just arousing enough to leave her wanting more.

"Sooo good, Cloud," she told the room, a shift in the corner the only acknowledgement that he was still tehtere. "Please… more…" She obliged herself the way she'd have wanted him to, lifting the hem of her nightgown to touch skin on skin.

Cloud couldn't hide his sharp intake of breath.

She let her heightened gasps and pants speak for her, as she increased the pressure, the sped, the knowledge of being watched only fueling her desire more. She worked her hand between her legs, pretending her hands were his, she pushed her legs apart, wiggling slightly to give him the best view of her pussy.

Cloud STARED. He was stroking himself in earnest now, not wanting to break the fourth wall, though there were so many things he wanted to ask her to do; the only thing stopping him was that he couldn't decide which one to ask for first. Open your legs up. No, slide a finger into yourself. Make that three. No, finger your clit some more first –

She had her own ideas. She didn't stop the attention on her sweet little bud, but the hand at her breast cupped the left one firmly, once, before traveling down to join its twin. Without breaking the other's rhythm, fingers tickled near her vaginal opening, teasing the sensitive entrance. Oh, fuck…

Abruptly, she thrust her fingers in, crying out as loud as if he had been the one to impale her. He had to let himself go for the moment, ready to come right then. Shit, Tifa…

He hadn't known she had it in her. On second thought, maybe he had.

"CLOUD!" she cried out, a full-throated wail, and drove deeper, faster. Her breathing Her breathing hitched with little cries, and Cloud recognized the familiar signs. She suddenly lurched off the bed, and he knew she was coming, coming…

- and he was there with her on the bed, his hand sweeping hers away, not allowing her to crash down, not yet. Forcing another jolt out of her – quick, hard, not as overwhelming as the first, but enough to leave her gelatinous, exhausted, as he mumbled guttural sounds and half-formed curses into her ear.

"Thank you," finally came his first discernible words.

"You're welcome," she whispered, sated. She was surprised to find out how much she liked it herself,. "Was it what you wanted?"

"No. Ten times better," he whispered lovingly. "This might not be the best time to tell you I spilled all over the rug."

"Who cares," glowed Tifa.

She curled up against him, his arm around her head, playing with a strand of hair as she let herself go to sleep. Not this night would she be without Cloud to keep her safe and warm.

Author's Note: Hiii, from Yosemite this time! It's been very peaceful writing Cloti among the trees.

Glad everyone is enjoying the story. This story is very important to me on a personal level, and it's very satisfying to see it coming to fruition. Not that we're at the end, not yet – I have enough notes for at least another 100K words – but all the stuff I've been building up is finally starting to be resolved.

Wondering where this is going? Since we're past canon, all I'm going to say is, STICK WITH ME UNTIL THE END. I expect to blow a few minds by the end of this.