Chapter 90, εуλ0017

ZACK. The name screamed in his head, making itself known to his consciousness. A name that lately, he hadn't been thinking of as often as he used to – didn't need to because it was always there, in a place close to his heart, nearly as close as was Tifa. ZACK. His best friend, reaching out to touch his life in this unexpected way, when he thought there was nothing left to be found.

"You okay, man?" Kunsel asked with concern. Cloud wondered what kind of impression he was making today. The commander of the armed forced, looking like he was about to faint like a woman. Where had that expression come from, anyways? Tifa had never fainted in her life. Been in a come three times, countless others, and occasionally had a little too much to drink –

He was avoiding the subject.

He forced himself to look squarely into Kunsel's eyes, hoping he was projecting every bit of genuine love he felt. "Zack Fair gave his life for me," Cloud said softly.

"I know," Kunsel replied. "Or, I deduced. His death - his murder – was one of the poorest coverups Shinra ever did. I didn't even have to try to find out about it. And when a man named Cloud Strife started showing up with SOLDIER-like strength… and I knew there was never anyone in SOLDIER by that name… it wasn't hard to connect him with an infantryman who'd been missing as long as Zack." Kunsel shrugged. "The details were all there, if anyone cared to string two thoughts together."

Distantly, Cloud noticed the unspoken pink eledunk in the room. Something Kunsel had left unsaid. I know what happened to you in between, the unspoken words screamed into his mind; unless Kunsel had actually read Hojo's notebooks, there were no further details needed. Strangely, it made him trust the man even more. Even as Kunsel had just demonstrated his knack for digging up secrets, the was something… open… about him. Sincere. The same quality that had been so essential to Zack's identity.

Zack's friend…

"Well, I guess we don't really have to talk about a job, that's a given," Cloud told him. "I'm sure that Reeve already told you that you'd been guaranteed a high-ranking officer role, being a former member of SOLDIER." There weren't many such around, they having more or less dispersed to the far corners of Gaia. "I just have to sign one of these pieces of paper –" he gestured to the mess on the floor – "you take it to the main reception, they'll set up everything from there. Welcome to the WRO. But more importantly – I'd really like it if you could come meet my family tonight."

"I'd be honored," Kunsel replied. "You have a family, then?"

"A wife. Two children." Cloud looked down at his WRO desk, realizing he'd never brought in a picture, like he had on his desk back home. He needed to fix that. They probably should take some more recent photos, anyways. Denzel's' sixteenth birthday gift had been a cameraphone, and though it was now loaded with pictures of Mina, Cloud was certain his son wouldn't mind taking a few pictures of the rest of them, too.

Kunsel looked at him for a long time, strangely searching. "Congratulations," he finally said. "SOLDIERs rarely get married."

"I never was in SOLDIER," Cloud replied reflexively. Averting his eyes, he fumbled through a pocket instead. "Let me just make a phone call, then." He found the phone he'd been looking for, the latest model, so complex that he could hardly find the "call" button among all the games that Denzel had programmed in. When the hell was he supposed to play something called "Angry Birds", anyways? Finally finding it, he pushed the speed dial for Tifa's personal cell, and stepped outside the office door.

"Cloud!" her voice began. Even after all this time, she still sounded delighted every time that he called, and it never failed to warm his heart. (Broken, sad messages never returned; he still shuddered every time he realized what he'd nearly lost, not to Geostigma, but to his own misguided intentions.) "How are you? Work going okay today?"

"Yeah, everything's going great. Listen, uh, could you set an extra place on the family table tonight?"

"Bringing a guest home?" Tifa chirped happily. "Who? Vincent wants to come by? He hasn't seen Marlene in a while. Or does Reeve want a little extra company? He always works too hard, even if it IS for the good of us all."

"No one you know… yet. It's complicated. Uh, could you make something special? Maybe break out some of the nicer wine?"

"Now, this is intriguing." He could hear her smiling. "I'm looking forward to whatever surprise you have in mind for me, Cloud Strife. Consider it done."

"Great. I'll see you tonight." He paused. "I love you." One, he said silently to himself. He'd been making it a point to tell her he loved her at least once every day, even if he had to count it off to keep track.

He backwards-stepped inside the office. "It's all set," he told Kunsel. "You'll be dining with the best chef in Edge tonight. I'll give you the address. We usually eat around eight, or whenever we can get our kids to sit down at the same time. Have a way to get there? If not, I'll set you up with some transportation from the organization's fleet."

"Nah, it's okay. I've got a bike." Kunsel lifted a set of keys; Cloud immediately recognized the model. Not as powerful as Fenrir – nothing was but still a big, solid bike.

"Great. We're friends already. I'll see you tonight." As Cloud bent forward to write down Seventh Heaven's address, he felt joy pulling his face into a grin. It was a rare and cherished feeling.

"I'm looking forward to it," Kunsel replied, taking Cloud's proffered slip of paper and rising to leave.

So am I, thought Cloud. So am I.

Cloud returned home at his usual record speed to find Denzel and Tifa already fussing around in the kitchen. They had taken him quite at his word and were preparing an elaborate meal; the table was already set with their best dishes, even wine glasses. Including one for Denzel who, now that he was being treated as an adult, was about to make his own decision whether to drink or not.

(To be fair, Marlene was allowed to partake as well in small doses – but she'd declared quite firmly that she simply didn't care for the stuff.)

He took Tifa in his arms for a warm, intimate embrace; feeling, as always, the flush of pleasure that came with her body pressed against his. Denzel, gave a looser, friendlier hug, before looking around for the missing member of his family.

"Marlene's upstairs," Tifa explained. "She'll make it back down, eventually."

Cloud had only a few minutes to freshen up and make himself presentable before he heard the voice of the expected guest below; in a low buzz he talked to Kyrie, who was running the bar tonight. He stepped out to greet their dinner companion, escorting Kunsel through the bar and into the back area reserved for family and friends.

Tifa looked up as they entered; Denzel was already seated at the table. The dinner had nearly all been brought out now, the wine poured, waiting for the guest of honor to take his spot at the head of the table.

Cloud held a hand hovering over Kunsel's shoulder, just a little short of touching. "Kunsel, this is my wife, Tifa," he began, "and my son, Denzel." He turned back to his family. "Guys, I want you to meet someone. This is… Kunsel." Cloud took a deep breath, struck by a sudden attack of nerves, without him being particularly sure why. "He was in SOLDIER. He knew Zack."

The transformation over Tifa was instant, remarkable; Denzel less so, but his eyes grew wide. "Oh my," Tifa began, stepping forward to embrace Kunsel as if he was a long-lost brother. "Welcome, Kunsel. Welcome to our home."

She released Kunsel from her grasp; a bit of pink brushing her cheeks gave away her slight embarrassment. For once, Cloud did not feel that familiar surge of jealousy whenever a strange man touched Tifa. "Your son," Kunsel idly remarked. "He looks most like his mother, but I can see some of you there too."

Denzel shifted awkwardly; it was left to Tifa to explain. "Well, actually," she began, "neither of our children are biologically ours. They're both adopted."

"No one in this house is related by blood," came a voice from their newly-built back stairway. "But we're still a family. Just because Cloud and Tifa have sex doesn't make them any different."

"Marlene!" Tifa's head swiveled. "That's not appropriate to say!"

Marlene paused at the halfway point of the staircase, had the good sense to look abashed. "You told me it was nothing to be embarrassed about," she said, half-accusing.

"Yes, but we don't know what might make our guest uncomfortable," Tifa chided.

Their guest, however, had apparently not even noticed. He was staring up at Marlene slightly open-mouthed, eyes widened in surprise.

Over the past couple of years, Cloud had become aware of the subtly different ways men were beginning to look at Marlene. She was going to be quite tall, already taller than Tifa – Cloud had made peace with the fact that both of his children were going to tower over him – and every day becoming more and more beautiful. And as time went on, men would stare at her just a little longer, with just a little more hunger.

The way Kunsel was looking at Marlene now was nothing like that.

There was no subtlety; Kunsel was staring with absolute astonishment, but under that tinged with a great deal of familiarity, as if he had somehow met Marlene before. But that was impossible, wasn't it? As the family sat down to dinner and questions were asked, answers given, it became clear that Kunsel had been gone from Midgar for a very long time.

He'd supported himself, he said, doing the sort of mercenary work that Cloud had once claimed to have done, in places more distant than Strife Delivery Service had ever reached. Other times, just simple labor - easy for him to do with his mako enhancements, and desperately needed in the days after Meteorfall. It brought Cloud back to his own early days in Edge, as people both far from Midgar and from inside the city itself had tried to set up new lives.

He snuck a gaze at Tifa, leaning over the table as she listened raptly to Kunsel's stories. How far they had come since then. Their children, near-babies back then, or so it had seemed – fragile young orphans entrusted to their care, and one they hadn't even bene sure would live.

No one had yet asked about Zack. It was as if his ghost sat at the table, yet no one wanted to acknowledge it was there; as if doing so would shatter this fragile remembrance that came to them in the form of Kunsel. Marlene, however, seemed utterly nonplussed. If Kunsel DID indeed know her from somewhere, it didn't seem to be from anywhere Marlene remembered.

Dinner passed pleasantly, and as many things as Cloud wanted to know, he still found himself unable to ask about Zack. Some of the urgent need was done – that was part of it – the other was that he felt reassured there was no rush. Kunsel wasn't going anywhere – not now, with no Shinra in pursuit. Not in this new, peaceful world. He took another moment to scan the faces of his beloved family, relishing the fact that they were all here to share this moment together.

Kunsel scanned the faces of Cloud Strife's family. He never would have expected… Well. He should have known better. So this is what happens to the hero when the story was over. But was it over, really? Zack's – and Aerith's – story had a definite end, but here was Cloud, living a normal, peaceful life.

He'd been drifting, uncertain, his faith shaken; a First-Class SOLDIER, watching the fate of those who came before him, questioning what it was all for. But if Cloud could make a life anew, maybe there was hope for him, too.

As Cloud's family chattered amongst themselves before him, Kunsel understood that Marlene was right. A true family, he could see; after the horror of captivity, the fate of Zack, he was glad to see at least some good had come out of that whole mess. Later, he'd have to figure out how Marlene came to be with them; later, he'd tell them everything he could about Zack. In the meantime, he sunk deep into the warmth and atmosphere, with a simultaneous bit of awe for the near-legendary man before him.

Inevitably, dinner ended; Marlene volunteered to clean up, though Tifa pitched in, and their voices trailed off as Cloud and Kunsel stepped outside for a bit of air. Denzel had set up at a booth in the slowly-filling bar, doing his homework, insisting he preferred a bit of noise around him to the quiet upstairs. Kunsel had been surprised and intrigued to learn what Denzel had been studying; it looked like the best parts of Shinra's technology were still there, though being reappropriated for more peaceful means, and the WRO was finding ways to even go beyond that.

Kunsel lit up a cigarette; Cloud looked at him in surprise. "I wouldn't have expected you to be a smoker," he said.

"To tell you the truth, I hate these things," Kunsel replied. "It's an occasional habit that I use to relieve nerves, I guess."

"Did we make you nervous?" asked Cloud, concerned. "I could get you another glass of wine…"

"No, it's not that…" Kunsel said. "I guess… Well. It was an interesting evening."

"What do you mean?" asked Cloud.

Kunsel paused; he took a long drag of his cigarette while he thought. "You know… I told Zack something once," he finally said. "I don't know if you ever heard of Angeal?"

Cloud paused, looking away, searching through his memories. He tried to remember the details of his and Zack's escape, but found nothing there. But suddenly… a small recollection from his days as a Shinra enlistee. "I did hear of him," he finally admitted, as Kunsel looked on pointedly. "But… I guess…" Cloud hesitated. "Sephiroth was my hero in those days. I hate to admit it now. But I guess I didn't much think of the other Firsts at all."

Kunsel grunted. "Understandable," he told Cloud, "but looking back now… Well. I'd told Zack once that Angeal was the spiritual head of SOLDIER. But now I'm wondering. If anyone really embodies what SOLDIER was meant to be… For a long time, I would have said Zack. But now… I'd probably say you."

Cloud looked to the ground; he could actually feel himself blushing. "I don't understand," he finally admitted.

"You don't have to," Kunsel assured him. "But… let me try to explain. Zack told me one time about a conversation he'd had with Tseng, about SOLDIERs vs monsters. It was weird. Shinra mechs couldn't actually tell the difference." Spontaneously, he placed a hand on Cloud's shoulder, seeing his confusion; he considered a hug, before deciding that was a little too much. "Zack said SOLDIERs were supposed to be protectors. Guardian angels. That was what he wanted to be, what Angeal had taught him to be, Before Shinra dicked him over and took that away."

Kunsel took a deep breath. "Zack was what SOLDIER was meant to be. He carried that to the end. But you, Cloud, maybe you still have a chance to decide what that means." Cloud's eyes grew wide; Kunsel knew the point had struck home. "Angeal always said… it's what's in the heart that matters. And, you know, after seeing you and your family tonight… You can do it, Cloud. You can be what SOLDIER was meant to be. I don't care that you never made it in."

Cloud just stood there, dumbstruck. Things he'd never thought about before. The two men stood there, not speaking, as the noise of the city at night penetrated the silence between them. Cars driving the main street nearby, the meow of a cat, shouting voices from a fighting couple nearby… all the things that made up life in the city of Edge that was now his home."

"One more thing," Kunsel finally said. "I think I owe you apology."

"Why?" Cloud asked, confused.

"Because…" This time it was Kunsel's turn to hang his head. "I… didn't make it to Zack. I tried. But maybe when you reappeared… I could have tried to find you. I did try. Should've tried harder. Had I found you… I could have maybe told you the truth."

He left it hanging there. Cloud didn't ask him to elaborate. His fucked-up memory time, when he placed himself in Zack's shoes. When he'd lost who he was, and hurt others because of it…

And in the end, it had been only Tifa who could bring him back. The woman whose voice still filtered out to him, mixing with the sounds of the dark sky above. Kunsel was right. Somehow, he had found his way home, to this woman and this life, and he owed it to Zack to see it through.

You'll be my living legacy.

Zack, I'm doing my best.

"You know, Kunsel," Cloud began cautiously, "I've had a lot of time to think about this. And I think… Maybe things HAD to happen the way they did. For whatever reason. The Goddess, the Planet, the Lifestream… I don't even know. Sometimes I feel like I can almost hear the Planet. But maybe, that's what things were supposed to be like… even with all the hurt."

Aerith, his heart panged again. He'd gotten his forgiveness, but there was still so much regret, for the life she hadn't lived. The family she could have had. Children with Zack. They could have had the happiness he and Tifa now shared every day. It was that bit of hurt that had seeped so deep into his bones that he could never get it out.

And he didn't want to. He was older now, maybe even wiser. He'd come to accept, even treasure, even the parts of his life that hurt the most – because, above all else, they were a reminder he was alive.

The hour was getting close to midnight; the bar was hitting full steam inside. Denzel would be in his backside lair of a room, texting or talking to Mina; this was a rare day she wasn't there. Marlene would still be up, either socializing or painting upstairs, and Tifa much the same; his wife would be either chatting in the bar with the guests, or upstairs with a book preparing to snuggle in for the night. Either way, when he walked back through that door, she'd be there with a smile, and in his arms tonight. He wanted to make love tonight; to let her know, in the best way he knew how, how much she truly meant to him. To hear her crying out in pleasure; see her reaching her climax underneath him, the two of them shattering together, sharing the experience that they'd had a thousand times before but still seemed new.

SOLDIER or no, Kunsel yawned. Looking down at the cigarette in his hands, he realized it had burned to ash, and he'd barely even touched it. He flicked the butt into the trash can with the slightest feeling of disgust.

"It's late," Cloud excused himself. "We've kept you here too long."

"Yeah, I better be getting back," Kunsel answered. "I found a temp place to stay this afternoon after I saw you, but it's back in the WRO city."

Cloud looked to Kunsel's bike, stationed outside the door to Seventh Heaven, and did some quick math. "That bike takes an hour-ish to get back there. You okay to drive? We'll put you up if you aren't." The office would do; they'd started putting in some extra rooms in the back, near Denzel's room, but they weren't yet complete.

"Nah, I'm good," Kunsel assured him, pointing to his eyes. Unlike Cloud's, they were still brown; but there was that faint cool glow nonetheless. "Mako. Heightened senses. I know that's how you can drive your monstrosity so fast."

Claud actually chuckled. "Fenrir's a beast, yeah." Kunsel's hand had slipped from his shoulder; this time, Cloud first reached out his hand for a shake, before giving in and throwing forward an awkward hug. It was for only a second, but it was the best Cloud could do to let Kunsel know what it meant to have found this man back in his life.

Kunsel gracefully pulled away and turned. He'd already made polite goodbyes to the rest of the family; only Cloud remained. "Think about it, Cloud," he said.

"I will," Cloud promised, as Kunsel hopped on his bike and rode away.

And as Kunsel pulled away, his mind filled with hope, he kept coming back to only one thought.

Cloud, the last SOLDIER…

The church looked the same as the last time she'd been there. It didn't much change anymore. Desperately in need of repairs, but at least not falling apart further. It was something, at least, until Marlene could figure out what to do about it; just another small thing on the long list that lay before her.

She wore a simple purple dress today, belted, with a skirt cut to end in long diamond points that tickled the surface of the familiar pool as she knelt down beside it. The water shimmered at her touch, its pristine surface disrupted – but, she sensed, an interruption not unwelcome as the circles expanded outward to reach the pedestal where her father's sword smiled on she and the water both.

The thought brightened her mood, just a little.

She was endlessly gaining in power, the pace itself accelerating, every DAY she could feel herself just a little bit stronger. And as much as she had expected it, knew it was going to happen if not the how, at times it felt truly overwhelming.

"Too much," her mother had said once; and now Marlene understood. All the thoughts and dreams of which the Lifestream was made, a river of babbling voices, a torrent of swirling images, and sometimes it was all she could do to shut out the noise and visions and remember who she, Marlene, really was.

She fiddled with the latest materia combination she'd come up with – this one a medley of earth and water. Trying to find out if it would help the flowers grow. She herself didn't need it, of course; it was for others, those lacking in her capabilities, who might want to grow things further away.

She'd showed her experiments to Denzel, but he hadn't exhibited much affinity for them; it had been Mina who had reacted in surprise and delight. She'd taken Marlene's bracelet in her hands, the softly glowing balls within reflecting in her eyes. It seemed to be a little different for everyone. Marlene surmised it had to do with which currents of Lifestream they could most easily reach.

Marlene had realized it was the threads of the Lifestream she was seeing over. Water nearby seemed to help – maybe just for the similarity it had – but the actual journey was over those currents of spirit energy. She could see over the world this way; another way in which she was gaining skill, as she was not in the Lifestream itself – as through water, it grew blurrier the further away the other place. Most of what she could see was good. But she'd been able to take her own memory of the place and see all the way to the Forgotten City; she thought with some more effort, she might be able also to see through time, and the things that had happened there.

Her mother, laid to rest.

Other times, what she could see was horrible – SOLDIER treatments. Fighting. DYING. She knew where the remaining SOLDIERs could be found, could follow the threads of the Lifestream straight to them. This seemed to be something particular to her; Denzel couldn't do it, nor anyone else she had met. Only her mother had ever experienced anything like it.

A time or two, she could have sworn she'd almost seen Sephiroth; not what was fragmented through the Lifestream, never to return – but rather, as he once must have been. She'd flee in terror, not wanting to see the monster he had become, the one who had tried so many times to destroy Cloud from the inside. She did not want to face the man who had killed her mother. Maybe someday she'd be willing to go further back, trace the route over time; to see him as the human being he once must have been. The one her father had said Sephiroth once had been. But not yet.

She could see Zack and Cloud as they hovered, floating in stasis, finally realizing she was seeing through the mako itself. She nearly screamed seeing the injection in Cloud's left arm, the spot where Geostigma had attacked – the sensation emanating from that spot so potently that even as a child she had known it was there. She remembered touching fingers to Cloud's bicep, wishing the pink ribbon tied around it could do something to help his pain. It had been a nice thought, but neither that ribbon nor the one she wore in her hair were a talisman the way the flowers and sword were – simply a token of remembrance she wore still, for her own reasons, when everyone else had let theirs go.

And she'd shaken herself free of those waking nightmares, reminding herself how Cloud had grown and healed, slowly freeing himself from his demons, and how every day he did so still.

Cloud had no idea that he himself was his own miracle.

You'll probably be stronger than your mother, her parents had told her. The explanation they had given – the interaction of SOLDIER modifications and Cetra abilities – made sense, but it also meant Aerith could only look forlornly on the daughter who, in life at least, would surpass her. Marlene was heading into uncharted territory and no one could give her a map. Even as others looked to her for answers to what they themselves might be facing.

How could she expect to help them when she could barely help herself?

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised to find you here."

Marlene didn't need to turn around; she knew it was Kunsel, the unexpected arrival in her life, the man who had once known her father. "I'm not surprised you came here either," she answered, without taking her eyes from the water. "I figured you'd make it here sooner or later."

Boots stomped on the church's floorboards, followed by the echoes of the same, as Kunsel came forward to join her. She noted with pleasure the way he carefully avoided the flowers; the patch had grown back lush and full, but that didn't mean she wanted to see it trampled. The dark leather was scuffed, faded, evidence of his wanderings; she wondered how long it had been. All the way since Meterofall? He'd been vague on that point, only noting that few SOLDIERs had wanted to return to Shinra in any capacity. They'd taken up trades, careers, even started families, with nothing but the telltale glow of mako to say they'd ever had a different destiny.

"Is the flower wagon still here?" Kunsel asked.

Marlene pointed to the archway that led to the back. "It's still there. Still broken," she added. "I don't think I want to get it fixed. It just doesn't seem right."

The flower wagon. So like a baby carriage. Aerith had told her the story of that day; Zack gaily tying on ribbons and artificial blooms, and Aerith wondering all the while if the mako in his system had somehow let him know the truth.

("I had absolutely no idea," Zack had chuckled; but the droop of his face afterward echoed the mournful irony of that laugh.)

"I offered to repair it myself," Kunsel told her. "I checked on her, while Zack was gone. You know, while she was…"

"Pregnant?" offered Marlene. She raised her head then, cocking one eyebrow at the man standing over her.

"Yeah." Kunsel looked down to meet her eyes. Brown looked into brown, the color hiding all but the faintest of glow. "The first time… was after Zack's killed-in-action notice. By then she was showing." He gulped. "I, uh, kind of had some suspicions, some allusions, information I got from Turk sources and the rest I put together. But I never could get a straight answer. The truth was pretty well hidden, even from me."

Marlene stood and turned to him, but Kunsel already was looking towards the Buster Sword.

"Maybe I should have told her. But I had no way of knowing then that he wasn't coming back." His shoulders sagged. "I wanted to help her. Might have married her myself, if I thought it would do any good. If it would have kept her safe. Her and…"

He stopped there. Nothing more needed to be said. Marlene had no comfort to offer him but the reality of her own presence in the here and now, and the peace of the church's sanctuary that they shared together.

"The flowers seem so alone in the church without her," Kunsel finally said.

"No," Marlene countered. "They've found a new friend instead." She pointed to the Buster Sword; Kunsel looked and flinched, and Marlene realized he hadn't known it was there. "They were destroyed during the end of Geostigma. They gave their okay, knowing they'd be coming back." Great Gospel, her mother's power sent to wipe the church clean and heal those who suffered. The rain that had given her brother and so many others their lives back. She'd felt rather than seen it; but even at that early age, it had given her some ideas of what she might eventually be able to do. "Trust me, they're fine," she assured the man, rising to stand beside him; she reached down to take his hand, as they stared at the flowers, the pool, the sword that stood vigil in its center.

"It's a heavy burden you carry," he finally said.

She smiled then, Aerith's smile, the one she must have carried before she became enshrined in Shinra's web. "Actually," she replied, "it's the lightest one of all. Because it's one you give away."

Kunsel remained silent for a long time, considering.

"You look more like her now," he told Marlene. "I saw the pictures at your house. You looked a little more like Zack when you were younger, though they're both still there."

Marlene actually blushed a little. "That's not all of my mother that's coming out as I get older," she said, looking at Kunsel rather pointedly.

Kunsel could see it, see Aerith as she must have been, see what had made Zack Fair fall completely in love. He owed – maybe not a debt, but an honor to this girl. Honor and dreams, Zack had said. He'd do whatever he could to protect her.

"You know, I went to the WRO not even knowing that Cloud was there," Kunsel began conversationally. "It was just an educated guess. I just marched up, asked to see Cloud Strife, and sure enough, there he was." He paused. "Cloud… wasn't what I had expected."

"What did you think of him?" asked Marlene.

"I thought he'd be more, I guess, awe-inspiring." Kunsel snorted. "Taller. Instead he seemed…" Kunsel seemed to struggle with words for a moment. "More human."

"Cloud's really just a dork." Marlene laughed, and Kunsel could see the cheerful girl she once must have been, the one who was still there under the weight of her responsibilities – to her race, to the world, just like Aerith.

"I was hoping to find you eventually, but I had no leads. None. I don't even know how this has happened. Was it all just coincidence?"

Marlene smiled mysteriously. "Isn't coincidence just another way of saying destiny?" she asked coyly, leaving Kunsel wondering how much she really knew.

"Do you know why you never got Geostigma?" Marlene suddenly asked.

"No," Kunsel answered, taken aback. He'd never thought there had been a particular reason why he'd never gotten affected, though he'd certainly run into plenty of the afflicted during his travels.

"Because you never gave up," Marlene told him plainly. "I can see that about you."

Kunsel considered. He'd never thought of himself as particularly brave – more he just kept plodding on. But maybe that was all that was needed. Just to keep going, keep surviving. Wasn't that what Cloud and his family were doing after all?

"He has a message for you," Marlene suddenly said, as if she had been reading his mind. "He says… He got your emails. He thought of you, too, near the end."

"Really?" Kunsel asked, feeling the tears start to well up. He'd never really cried for Zack Fair before… maybe now was the time. "You can talk to them?"

"All the time," she softly assured him. "Mother, too."

"Tell them…" Kunsel paused, unable to say a word.

Marlene laid a hand on his arm. "They already know."

For a long moment, they could only stare at each other, sharing the knowledge that Marlene, more than anyone, knew what was to come.

"It's strange powers you have," he told her. "Don't you worry that you'll be persecuted? That another Shinra will come along, trying to use you?"

She smiled mysteriously, and Kunsel realized there was even more beyond what she chose to let him know. "I won't be alone to do it, soon enough," she told him cryptically. "But I'll need a lot of help…"

Author's Note: THANK YOU for your patience! I decided to just slap this first portion up, as it was ready to go. The rest of year 0017 is very very close; some scenes are finished, some still going through drafts. I might do it tonight, maybe tomorrow. I need a nap first.

I just need to tell you guys… life has been rough. Job switching, money, etc etc. When I started this story, during COVID lockdown, I had all kinds of free time… nowadays, not so much. But this month is slow, and I'm not working a lot, so we shall see. I definitely want to finish this before Rebirth, so I can see how Rebirth might change my perspective. but damn, isn't that getting close?

I know you guys watched the trailer over and over like I did. Didn't you love the Cloti? And the weird is-Tifa-real stuff… I feel like they are giving Tifa a VERY heightened role. I actually wanted more Aerith. Because I see they want us emotionally drawn into the new game; if it ends at the Northern Crater, shouldn't they be building us up more for… you know?

I'm sure there will be more information in the next trailer. Probably Tokyo Game Show in September. The final trailer, I'll have to skip until after I've played, because I expect like Remake the final trailer will be TONS of spoilers, and I want to enjoy the experience.

Anyways. I thought I'd tell you a little bit about my writing process. If this is boring, feel free to skip.

I've done longfics before, though this is shaping up to be the biggest yet. It's looking like it will cross half a million words. And since I saw you last, I've actually added at least a dozen scenes that I feel are needed for the story. For example, the first scene of 0018 is something I came up with very recently. Not to mention, out of what you've just read, some was written a year or more ago… and some literally in the last couple hours.

So you don't do this without learning a few things. I have a very "bottom-up" writing method, which essentially means things start as a mess. Have you ever done a big jigsaw puzzle (I do 2000-piece ones)? It's like, you do the frame but actually that is very little. So you spill out the pieces and kinda pick through them, and finally get a group of red ones that have to be the parrot, then some black ones that make the train… so you work in those mini-regions for a while… and slowly they start to combine and the full picture remains. At the end, you're filling in finishing touches, and you realize what you thought was a flower was the cat's butt after all.

Yeah.

I have three notebooks currently for this story (I do a lot of rough drafting by hand). One is raw text, one is labeled "notes-final stretch" (because we're getting close!) and one is for a particular event important enough that it will get its own chapter. Anyone mind more Cloti fluff? How about smut? No? Didn't think so. Because, of course, we want our Cloti happy, healthy, and having as much great sex as possible. And yes, they will absolutely get their happy ending – I'm expecting to blow a few minds as no one, to my knowledge, has figured out the ending. I am SO EXCITED to share with you what I have in store for these two, as well as the other players in this story. Some plotlines are winding down in this chapter; others have still more ahead.

It should be obvious by now that only Marlene (and your author) TRULY know everything that is going on. There are a few things even Aerith doesn't know.

But even though I haven't posted for months – many days not even writing – I have THOUGHT about this story every day. Literally. It actually gives me quite a bit of comfort when I'm down, and for that reason if for no other, I will see it through to the end.

If you have any questions about the story or even just want to know how the next update is coming, feel free to hit me up. PM on ff dot net; on Ao3 we're kinda limited to comments at the moment.

Enjoy, and I'll try to have more for you in the next day or two!

:heart: Alluma