Chapter 14: Connection

Ilyana has no idea how long she has been sitting there in the dirt with her legs crossed trying to 'connect to the Force' as Cal described it. Finally, she opens her eyes and stares at the stone as if she might intimidate it into helping her understand. How is it any different from what I've done before? She lets out an aggravated huff and leans back on her hands.

Just then, she recognizes a presence behind her and jumps to her feet. She whips around, ready to defend herself, only to find Cere standing about ten feet away, watching her. How long has she been there? Ilyana wonders.

"The Sith," Cere begins, "focus on the Force as it relates to one's self and what it can do for them. They put their devotion into pride, greed, ambition, and revenge. The Inquisitors may not have taught you the ways of the Force, but you've spent seven years immersed in a machine fueled by those ideals. Whether you know it or not, you were forged by the ways of the Sith and the Dark Side."

Ilyana listens quietly but does not move. She cannot tell if Cere is trying to help her or if her words are meant as an accusation.

"The Jedi," Cere continues, "focus on connection, interaction; the relationship between living things. The Force moves through all of us and through the galaxy. The Jedi live with the Force rather than trying to bend it to their will."

Cere finishes talking and as she turns and goes back to the ship, a skeptical smile crosses her face as if to say that she does not believe Ilyana will be able to make that change. Ilyana watches her go, feeling confused and very annoyed with that smile, like it was a challenge.

...connect to the Force deliberately, as a way of being… Cal's voice comes back to her again as she turns her back to the ship.

"Are all Jedi this cryptic?" she asks the stone, "Wait, patience, connection, the Force moves through us, with us," she continues saying to herself, working through a thought that is just shy of realization.

What happened that first time, she thinks. That first time she had used the Force she had not been trying to use it at all, but had been looking into herself for her lost memories.

"What happened?" she asks herself, "What did I do?"

Then the thought finally materializes. Without sitting back down she closes her eyes, and stops trying to connect to the Force but instead just allows herself to feel it. She stands there still, breathing slowly and deeply until time loses meaning. She allows each breath to slowly fill her up completely before being released again, and with each release her breath moves farther past her body. No, not her breath, rather waves are forming from her and moving off in all directions. As they spread she becomes more and more aware of all the things around her; the ground beneath her feet, the stone Cal had set before her. The waves continue to spread and she becomes acutely aware that life teems all around her, even in this desolate place. Creatures move about beneath the sand, burrowing new pathways beneath the dirt and stone only for those paths to close again once they have passed. Deeper beneath the desert, water flows through the rock, carving wide underground rivers which carry small aquatic creatures and microorganisms whose lives and deaths feed the planet.

"I see you," the voice echoes through her senses again now as it had that day long ago, but this time she does not let go of the connection.

"Who are you?" she asks.

"Who am I?" the voice responds. "I am the one in the middle."

"What does that mean?" she asks but just then a cry breaks through. That was Greez and he's in trouble! The thought pulls her back to the outcrop and immediately breaks the connection. She turns and runs back to the Mantis just as a great crashing sound comes from within the ship. In her haste, she does not notice the many stones around her suddenly fall to the ground.

Ilyana bursts onto the ship ready to confront whatever threat is there but there is no apparent threat, just a great disaster. Boxes of supplies that had previously been organized and stacked neatly are now in disarray around the common area. Containers of spices are lying on their side, their contents having spilled out onto the kitchen counters or dining table. Dishes and utensils litter the floor.

"What happened?" Ilyana asks Greez and Cere who are standing frozen in the middle of it.

"I have no idea!" Greez yells, throwing all four of his hands in the air. "I was preparing the scazz steaks when suddenly everything was floating!"

Ilyana's eyes become wide as she realizes what has happened. She had done it again. The same thing that had happened back in the barracks. She looks over at Cere and is met with a knowing gaze. For a moment Ilyana is sure Cere is going to accuse her of something, as if she had done this to them on purpose. Instead, an almost imperceptible smile curls the corner of her mouth as Cere says "Let's get this cleaned up."

"Yeah," Ilyana says and nods. Then they both go to work.

"Get it cleaned up," Greez mutters from the kitchen, "Sure. Is anyone going to explain what happened? No. This planet is weird." He says, shaking his head, and starts picking up containers of spices until he pauses, lets out a long sad sigh and sags his shoulders. His scazz steaks on the floor, ruined.

Several days later Cal again meets Ilyana outside the Mantis just after dawn. Each day she had risen before the rest of the crew, a remnant of the Empire's strict routines, and used the time to breathe in the silence. Occasionally Ilyana has found herself missing her shuttle, the isolation of it, as the constant interactions among the crew are unusual to her and can be overwhelming at times. Under no circumstances, however, would she truly want to return to the Empire, even if it was possible. For now she waits, drinking in the quiet.

Cal had a restless night's sleep. Shortly before dawn, he heard the quiet sound of footfalls on the ladder to the lower level and a rustle as Ilyana passed his bunk. He knew she rose before him everyday, but this was the first time he was awake when she did. Though he tried for a short time to go back to sleep, rest would not come. So he went to the galley and made a cup of caf from an instant pouch. It tasted more like charcoal than any bean, but it would do without any other options.

Cal sat on the sofa in the common area and slowly drank his caf as he turned his troubles over in his head. The longer they stayed the more he worried that the boy would not return in time and they would miss their chance with the other potentials. Were they waiting too long? While they were here they were not able to pursue other missions that would bring them credits and without credits could they keep the ship flying? Was bringing Ilyana here the right choice? She had not had another episode like the cantina but as her skills with the Force improved over the last few days he wondered if he might be training his enemy, giving her the skills she would need to defeat him. Today was the day, today he would get an answer to that last burning question.

He sets the remains of his caf on the table and rises, checking his lightsaber, then unlocks and removes the electrostaff from its mount and heads outside. As he walks towards the door he catches sight of Ilyana, barely visible from this perspective, and halts. She had been standing there, unmoving, while he drank his caf but suddenly she jerked her head and looked over her shoulder as if expecting someone. Was she sensing his approach? No. It was something else because now she looks around her as if hoping to find something. Cal had seen this happen before, once during their first night in town as he left the gambling den and several other times during training or around the ship. It was as if something had distracted her. Cal waits till she is focused in front of her again before heading down the ramp.

"Are you ready?" he asks as he approaches her.

Ilyana whirls around, using the Force to rip the electrostaff from his hand into hers and ignites the ends. Purple threads of electricity wrap themselves around the ends. As soon as the staff left his hand Cal had drawn and ignited his lightsaber. In her mind she sees the waves radiate out from her as they had during practice and she senses through him come into a ready stance through the waves. She steps back into the wave and launches herself at him. He blocks the incoming staff, sending sparks into the air. Without hesitation, she brings up the other end of the staff for a low strike, but he ignites the other end of his blade and blocks that as well. High, low, high, high her strikes come in quick succession, pushing him back toward the ship.

Unlike the last time they fought, she feels like time is moving slower. She knows she is as fast as always but she does not have to focus as hard as before to react to him; she is not only seeing him with her eyes but feeling his presence through the Force. And his intent.

There! An opening appears but just before she strikes she feels it, a slight shift in his stance in response to her and she jerks back in time to narrowly avoid what would have been a conquering blow. He feels it too. The small shifts and adjustments that give away my intentions.

Her step back gave him the opening he needed to push her back with the Force toward the edge of the outcrop and she let him. She slams one end of her staff down into the dirt to resist the push as she did the first time they fought but this time with only enough strength to keep her footing, not to stop herself from being pushed back a few feet. This gave him the confidence to follow with a powerful over-head strike that would have won the match just a couple of days ago, but this time she was ready. The staff was not dug in as hard as before so she was able to move it again more quickly.

As his blade drives down toward her, she pushes off with her back foot and shifts forward the emitter that had been pointing toward the sky and strikes him directly in the chest. The blow throws him backward and she follows immediately with another swing that breaks his grip on his lightsaber and sends it flying through the air where it deactivates. Without hesitation she continues forward and strikes him in the chest again, throwing him onto his back before the lightsaber falls harmlessly to the ground. She steps over him to throw a finishing blow but stops a few inches from his chest as he had done with his lightsaber in their first fight.

A green light appears on the edge of her vision and she turns to see the nightsister's fire move away from her back toward the ship and coalesce in Merrin's outstretched hand. Had Ilyana not stopped her attack when she did, Merrin would have stopped it for her.

Ilyana steps back and deactivates her staff but does not break eye contact with Merrin. The nightsister and the Purge Trooper, warriors both, come to an understanding without words that Merrin may be willing than the others to accept Ilyana but will not hesitate to act if Cal is threatened.

The tension breaks as Cal, still lying on his back, suddenly starts laughing. "That was it!" He says as BD-1 scampers over from the ship and tosses him one of the little glowing green healing stims. He catches the stim as he sits up and injects the medicine directly into his chest where she had hit him.

"You controlled yourself," he continues as Ilyana offers him a hand and helps pull him to his feet. "You stayed focused and waited for the right moment rather than giving in to your aggression. All you needed was some patience," he adds with a pleased shrug.

"Is that why you had me spend a whole day staring at a rock?"

Cal just smiles and shrugs in response then brings his hand to his chest and rubs the place she hit, "Did you have to hit quite so hard?"

"You're fine," she says. "It takes more than that to kill someone with an electrostaff."

"That does not seem to be a very effective weapon," Merrin says, motioning to the staff as she walks towards them.

"Our first directive is to capture. We're only expected to kill when capture is impossible," Ilyana answers. "To that end, we use weapons designed to subdue an opponent but too many repeated strikes or prolonged contact with the emitter will kill."

"Funny," says Cal, bringing his hands to his hips, "Every Purge Trooper I've come across only seemed interested in killing me."

"Every?" Ilyana asks pointedly.

"Okay, most," Cal corrects himself with a smile.

"Yeah, I can't imagine any of them would adhere to that directive if they ever actually encountered a Jedi."

"You did not," Merrin points out.

"Cal!" Cere calls from inside the ship and motions them all to come inside.

"I've been monitoring Imperial channels," Cere continues as all three join her on the ship, "and this just came over the holonet," Cere presses a series of buttons on the holotable and an image of Ilyana appears with Wanted blazing above her head and a list of charges below.

"That took longer than I expected,"Cal says, staring at the projection.

"Why is this a problem?" asks Merrin, "Are we not already wanted?"

"We are," says Greez, joining them from the cockpit, "but a shiny, new wanted bulletin will catch people's attention more than one that's been hanging around for a while. Eventually they all turn into background noise but a new bulletin? That stands out."

"We can't stay here any longer," Cere says urgently.

"I agree," Cal says with a disappointed sigh and turns to Merrin, "It's time to go."

Merrin nods in agreement.

"Okay," says Cere, "Who is the next candidate on your list?"

Ilyana steps forward and brings up another planet on the holomap, "Do any of you know the planet Lah'mu?"

They all shake their heads to say no except Cere, "Never been but I've heard of it."

"This one," Ilyana says pointing to the projection, "I think may actually be a Jedi. This is where I had planned to go before I was diverted to Rishi to keep an eye out for you. There's an agrarian region in the western hemisphere, mostly mountains with agricultural fields in the lowlands with very few major cities, only a few smaller towns and trading posts.

"The rumor is: a group of bandits had been terrorizing farmers and villagers, threatening them, demanding their food and supplies, taking everything and hurting the people. One day they were causing trouble in a village and began harassing an old man that the locals referred to as The Old Wizard. It is said that he is something of a hermit who lives in mountains. Mostly he keeps to himself but the people go to him when they are ill or injured. He gives them medicine, lays hands on them and they would be healed."

"You think he is healing them with the force?" asks Cere.

"I do." she says.

"I have never seen that." says Cal.

"It's rare," says Cere, "Much like your ability to connect to echoes in the force."

"You can do what?" Ilyana asks him.

"I'll tell you about it another time," he offers.

"Okay. Apparently," Ilyana continues, "the day the bandits were harassing this particular town they threatened to throw a child into a nearby ravine if the people didn't cooperate. The old man stepped in and fought them off. Some of the rumors say he fought with a homemade electrified staff weapon, others say it was some kind of torch."

"Or maybe a lightsaber," Cal finishes

Ilyana nods, "I think it's possible."

"It sounds like an incredible lead," Cere admits. "Why haven't the Inquisitors followed up on this one?'

"We get hundreds of leads and most are nothing," Ilyana explains. " I was supposed to determine if it was worth their time."

"It'll take some time to get there," says Greez, examining the star map. "It's not on a hyperspace route. It's gonna get real cozy in here," and he heads to the front of the ship with Cere following close behind.