A/N: Thank you to my beta McIlwain who understands my thoughts; knowing what I want to say and helping me say them.

This is rated MATURE for a reason; language and sex.

At first Tig thinks he's seeing things but a second look confirms there's a pair of wide green eyes staring back at him. "You're awake doll!" Tara nods while pointing to her throat. Tig jumps up and grabs a pitcher of water off the side table. He pours some water for Tara in a cup. Tig carefully raises Tara's shoulder until her lips are level with the edge of the cup. Tara drinks quickly until she's satiated, and then nods to Tig when she is finished. "Are you alright?"

Tara's voice is scratchy, but teasing. "Yeah, how is a person supposed to sleep around here with all that damn snoring?"

"Doll, if I had known that my snoring would wake you up I'd have been in here hours ago. How do you feel? I need to go get the doctor and call Jax."

"Tig... wait."

"What doll? What do you need?

"What happened, Tig?"

"You had an accident and hit your head."

"Come on Tig, don't play with me. The last thing I remember is being at the Center painting and Abel was with me." Tara's face becomes fearful. "Oh my God where's Abel? Is he hurt?"

"Tara Abel is fine. I'm going to go get the doctor so he can check you out and I'm going to call Jax."

With that Tig quickly left the room before Tara could ask any more questions. He doesn't know what Jax wants her to know and thinks it would be best if she heard everything from Jax.

Tig calls Happy, "Hap, is Jax still with you? Tara is awake and asking questions."

"What did you tell her?"

"She asked what happened and I told her she was in an accident and hit her head. She remembers being at the center painting with Abel then she started worry about Abel and I told her he was fine. Then I told her I was going to get the doctor and I got the hell out of there before she could ask me anymore questions. I don't know what Jax wants her to know and figured that he would want to tell her himself about the baby. The doctor is on his way now."

"Hold on and let me find him."

After a few minutes Happy returns. "Jax is on his way there now."

Jax manages to get to Tara's room in less than two minutes after dodging various medical staff and hauling ass. Doctors and nurses turning to watch Dr. Knowles' husband run down the hall towards her room; they can't help but worry and wonder what's going on. Jax stops in front of Tig who is waiting outside of Tara's room. "Tig, how is she?"

"She seems to be pretty alert considering how long she's been out. She's trying to remember what happened to her and I don't think it'll be too long before she figures it out. It'll only be a matter of time before everything comes together."

"What did you tell her?"

"She asked what happened and I told her she had an accident and hit her head. Then she remembered that she was at the Center painting with Abel. Of course, Tara being Tara, she started to freak out about Abel and I told her he was fine.'

"Good." Jax stops just before opening the door to take a deep breath. It seems to have become a ritual, to take deep breaths before entering Tara's room. A building of strength before the inevitable occurs. "Well wish me luck. This is going to be the hardest thing I've ever done."

"Hey, I'm here brother if you need me." Tig slaps Jax on the back and gives his shoulder a squeeze.

"Thanks."

Jax slowly opens the door and walks in with anticipation; he's hopeful that Tara's finally awake. When he sees Tara lying there with her eyes closed, his heart falls. But when Tara hears the door open, she slowly opens her eyes and looks at Jax with a faint smile.

"There're those beautiful green eyes I love so much. Oh, babe, it's so good to see you awake."

With a raspy, unused voice Tara replies, "Hey."

"Baby I've missed you so much. How're you feeling?" Jax gently strokes her forehead and holds her hand bringing it to his lips; he ever so lightly kisses the back of her fingers.

"Well. I've a little bit of a headache, and I feel kinda funny; I can't explain it, I just ache all over and I'd still be asleep if it hadn't been for Tig's snoring," she says with a pout.

Jax laughs, "Well if I'd known that I would've gotten him in here sooner."

Tara softly whispers, "Jax what happened?"

Sucking in air Jax decides to see what she knows first. "You had an accident Tara. You hit your head. What do you remember?"

"I remember I was at the Center trying to paint and Abel was throwing one of your fits." Jax can't help but to smile. "I finally got him settled in the break room with juice and cookies and then he started coloring." Tara pauses a minute, trying to understand and remember what's happened. "I had to go to the stock room to get some more paint so I could finish the room upstairs." Again Tara stops, trying to get her bearings and remember what happened next. "I remember starting up the stairs and then stopping when something caught my eye in one of the offices downstairs, but I can't remember what it was. I just remember that it was something. I'm sorry, Jax."

"Baby you don't have anything to be sorry about. Understand?" Tara nodded.

Jax turns his head as he calls Juice on his cell. "You need to go over the tapes from the Center again. I want to know who was in one of the down-stairs offices when Tara was attacked. I need to know who was there before and what they were doing. I don't care if you have to look through the whole damn thing with a magnifying glass. Find me something!" Juice hangs up and grabs his surveillance equipment. He leaves the hospital, heading back to his office at the clubhouse.

Jax returns to Tara's bed. He strokes the side of Tara's face with the backside of his hand then places Tara's hand in his slowly rubbing small circles with the back of his thumb. Jax kisses Tara's forehead realizing how close he came to losing his wife. He doesn't know everything that happened the night Tara was attacked but he is thankful, so thankful, that his wife is alive. Jax notices that Tara has started crying and softens his voice. "Go on baby. What happened next?"

"Then I turned and headed upstairs to finish painting." Tara stopped, breathing deeply and closing her eyes. "I can remember continuing up the stairs until I got to the top. It's a little hazy before I got to the top the paint bucket was getting heavy so I set it down for just a minute or two. Then I picked the paint bucket back up and was climbing the rest of the stairs when I felt someone grab my shoulders and pulled me hard from behind. I grabbed the hand rail trying to hold on but they were stronger than I was. Then they pulled me trying to push me down the stairs." Tara starts crying harder, looking Jax in the eyes, "I tried Jax, I tried so hard. I am sorry, I as so sorry, Jax. I tried to hold on."

Jax holds Tara as she latches on to him repeating over and over how sorry she is. "Shh... don't cry babe. This isn't your fault. None of this is your fault Tara." Jax felt Tara's tears begin to soften. "This isn't your fault you didn't do anything wrong Tara."

Tara continues, not wanting to look Jax in the face. "It was Gemma, Jax. Gemma did this." Tara reaches down to touch her stomach, a reflex after being pregnant for so long. Tara begins trembling once she discovers: her flat belly. "The baby... what happened to our baby Jax? Where is my baby? Tell me where he is?" Tara's voice is becoming hysterical and she looks at her husband. "JAX please how is he? I want to see him!"

"He's in the NICU. I need for you to try and stay calm, Tara. I know this is hard and confusing for you right now and we'll talk about this later. But right now the most important thing is for you to stay calm so Dr. Johnson can exam you. When he says it's okay for you to go I'll take you to in the NICU to see our son. But I need for you to stay calm, Tara, so the doctor can look at you. Please babe?"

Tara nods her head and grimaces with pain; she moves her hand to her head. Jax gives her a smile and kisses her on the side of her head. Then he places his finger under her chin and tilts her head up until her eyes are staring into his. Jax kisses Tara, he means for it to be a quick gentle kiss but it quickly turns into a hungry possessive one. Jax claims Tara's mouth, exhibiting all of his feelings into the kiss how much he loves her, his fear of losing her, the fear of losing their newborn son. Jax slowly pulls away from Tara. He glances at her red, swollen lips and he can't help but smirk. This is just how he likes them and he can't help himself; Jax has to go back for more. Jax covers Tara's mouth with his own, taking his tongue and outlining her bottom lip before slightly tugging it with this teeth. Jax continues to run his tongue over Tara's lips, tasting her, waiting for her to open her mouth and grant his tongue entrance. Tara opens her mouth letting Jax in as he thrashes his tongue into her mouth. Tara starts twisting her tongue to keep the rhythm that Jax set.

It was then that Dr. Johnson chose to walk in and interrupt. "Well, hello, Mrs. Teller. Glad you could join us again."

Tara gives Dr. Johnson a sheepish smile, "Hello. It's good to be back, I think."

Dr. Johnson smiles down at his patient. "I'm sorry Tara; this all has to be confusing to you. I can only fill in some of the medical gaps that have occurred." Of course Dr. Johnson knows the entire situation as well. Everyone knows, everyone except for Tara, and Dr. Johnson is going to let Jax handle that nightmare. "You fell down the stairs Tara and hit your head two days ago. You have a severe concussion and you've been unconscious since the fall. You had a placenta abruption due to the fall, and you started hemorrhaging shortly after. Your blood pressure fell dangerously low as a result. By the time you arrived at the hospital you'd lost a great deal of blood, we had to give you two liters of blood to get your blood pressure back up. You have 20 stitches along your hairline and 6 staples on the top of you your head." Tara begins grasping Jax's hand. He clasps his hand around her absently; Jax is too busy worrying about how he's going to tell Tara the rest of the story. Jax hears Dr, Johnson continuing in the background. "... a couple of cracked ribs and you have several bruises throughout your body. Some are worse than others, and you'll be sore for a while. All in all, you're a very lucky woman." Dr. Johnson tries to appear upbeat when he says that, but he knows Tara will disagree once she finds out about her baby.

Tara gives Dr. Johnson a puzzled look, "Did they get the bleeding to stop? Was a hysterectomy performed?" Tara is starting to feel a panic that she hasn't experienced before, the possibility of losing an essential part of yourself with no say about it beforehand.

"No. They were able to stop the bleeding; fortunately they didn't have to perform one. The doctors did discover some additional things that required attention, but Dr. Lewis will be in to talk to you about that."

Tara speaks so quickly she trips over her words. "When can I see my baby?"

"I knew you'd be itching to get to the NICU. I'll send a nurse in with some pain medicine and if that goes well, a tech will bring a wheelchair in for you. Stay in the wheelchair, Tara-remember, you aren't stable, and you have a severe head injury. You just got out of the ICU early this morning. I shouldn't even be allowing you out of bed. The only reason I'm letting you go is because I understand how important it is for you to see your baby, and I know you won't rest until you do. Plus I think your poor husband needs a break; he's been worn down to a frazzle." Dr. Johnson turns his attention to Jax. Jax I know I don't have to tell you this but don't let her up out of this chair unless you're helping her get into another chair in the NICU or getting her back in bed. Always be mindful of Tara's IV there will be push IV stands there for you to use if you need one. If she has to use the bathroom call a nurse to help her. You are going to have to watch her closely and keep an eye on her. If Tara appears lethargic, or if she loses consciousness, get a nurse or grab a doctor immediately Jax. I don't think you'll have any problem getting help for Tara in the NICU, they all love her. "

Jax nods in assent. "You know I won't let her escape from me now, doctor. I'll tie her to the wheelchair if I have to. I'm sure I won't be able to drag Tara away from the baby; how long should her visit be?"

"No more than an hour. Remember she just got out of ICU. Tara's still seriously injured. The only reason and I mean only reason, I'm letting her go is because of the baby. Tara should always be in a relining position, she doesn't need to be up long. They have chairs back in the NICU so she can sit while she's there. She may seem fine, but just because you can't see Tara's injuries doesn't mean they don't exist. Tara needs to take it easy or else she'll be back in bed in even worse shape. Then she won't be able to see the baby at all." Dr. Johnson looks at his watch. "I'll see you to later; enjoy your visit, Tara. I'll send the nurse in and return in about 15 minutes to see how you're doing," Dr. Johnson gives a weak smile while glancing at Jax. Dr. Johnson doesn't envy the young man's position.

Jax kisses the side of Tara's head, relishing the fact that he can. "So how's my favorite girl doing?"

"Okay I guess. I hurt all over but the only thing I want to do is go see my baby."

"I know you do Tara. Jax closes his eyes and begins to gather his strength. But there's something we need to talk about first."

"What?"

"Tara our little guy doesn't have a name yet, I've waited for you so we can name our son. We need to decide on a name. Do you have any in mind? We really haven't discussed names so I wasn't sure if there were any you had in mind or were considering. I know we didn't get around to having this conversation before but the little guy deserves a name."

"I'm not sure Jax. You've been around him I haven't." There is the tiniest bit of sorrow in Tara's voice. "You know him better than I do, I haven't even seen him yet so you tell me."

"I tell you what, Tara-let's go have you visit with him, and then we can both decide what suits him. It'll be a joint venture."

Tara's pain medicine is starting to work and her pain threshold has been measured. In fifteen minutes a wheelchair is in her room. Now that Tara can visit her son she finds herself full of nerves. "I'm scared Jax."

Jax tries to throw some humor into the situation. "You are? You're scared of a little thing like meeting your son? Then Jax's tone turns more serious. I understand babe, I really do; I was scared the first time I saw him. Come on let's get you in this wheelchair so we can go to the NCIU and see our son. I promise you the fright will go away as soon as you see him."

Jax carefully gets Tara's IV bag and hangs it on the wheelchair pole. Then Jax helps Tara leave her bed, almost carrying her so nothing will happen to her. Half-way to the chair Tara thinks about changing her mind because she's in so much pain. After she gets settled in the chair Jax asks, "Is that better? Does it hurt as much? I can put you back in the bed if it hurts too bad."

"No Jax, I'm here and I'm ready so I want to go see my boy. I'll be fine."

"Okay if you say so then let's go." Jax wheels Tara out of her room and towards the NICU. For Tara to meet her dying son..