Dear readers, I give you my first Ed, Edd n Eddy fic to honor the 14th anniversary of "Ed, Edd n Eddy's Big Picture Show". While I do feel this overall was a solid conclusion to a great show, it still left some details unclear. There are certain things I felt only Eddy could answer, such his brother's name and why he searched for him of all people, so I decided to explore the finale here through his perspective. Other characters could've discussed the final scam or what happened after the movie ended, but not all of what went through this guy's head. Since this contains spoilers for Big Picture Show (and various other episodes), it's highly advised you watch the whole show before reading.
Sometimes you see people think of great ideas. There are other times when their plans end poorly. My name is Eddy McGee, and I've had a mix of both. It's been years since the biggest backfire of my life happened. What was this, you ask? A botched amusement park idea I carried out on a hot summer day with my friends, the one-eyebrowed Ed Temby and the hat-loving brainiac Edd Wendell (or Double D as we call him to avoid confusion). We thought it would be fun for everyone from the Peach Creek cul-de-sac, but boy were we wrong!
Four of our neighbors showed up: the bald Jonny Jordan who loved wood, the bike-obsessed Kevin Melville, the laid-back blonde Nazz Van Bartonschmeer, and the local Shepherd's son Rolf Diedrich. The only two who didn't were an insecure guy named Jimmy Alberts and Ed's younger sister Sarah, who none of us could find at the time. We had a big plan to dazzle the cul-de-sac with a saw-in-half trick, a speed course, a trap-loaded obstacle course, a loaded ice cream truck, cement for sculpting, and some paint among other things. How did everything end so poorly? Well, I can only blame myself for it.
Let me tell you personally what happened. I found an unused ice cream truck to lure them all over, with somebody accidentally dropping their cone out the window with how fast I drove, too eager to get things going to focus on much else. We didn't notice until it was too late how three goats from Rolf's backyard farm had been chasing us (seemingly angry over how their feeding time was cut short). Once we all got out, they headbutted the truck so hard it crashed into somebody's lawn and messed up their yard, knocking their canoe through a fence and a tree into an alley! Thankfully nobody got hurt from that. My monobrowed pal thought preparing toast would help calm them down and put some into a nearby toaster from the alley that tree landed within. He was about to butter the finished pieces when the son of a shepherd insisted "Do not feed them more than one piece each!"
Ed complied after adding butter to each piece, satisfying the goats and their owner. Aside from that incident, our plan wasn't going too badly until we ran out of water for cement, which was used to make custom figures of whatever the other kids wanted and could take home afterwards. Our clients got impatient waiting for it to be filled as they wanted to make designs with it. I got impulsive and was eager to obtain more ASAP. My mistake here was ignoring Mr. Hat Lover's warning of "Don't push the red start button yet! We need more time for the machine to cool down before it collects more water."
Had I stopped and listened to him, much could've been avoided, but there's no undoing that now. Once I pressed said button, the machine began to go haywire! It splattered lots of hot cement around the alley and knocked around various objects. Not helping is how I did so as Mr. One Eyebrow was in the middle of toasting bread for himself when feeling hungry. The two of us along with Double D sprinted away shortly after the disaster started. Nazz was less fortunate; the machine's rattling knocked around hot cans of black paint we planned to use for the cement, scorching her hair and clothing when she tried to get away. That was a painful sight for all of us, especially when us three Eds plus Jonny and Kevin had been smitten with this lady for quite some time. Before I could utter any apology, Nazz furiously yelled "You'll pay big time for ruining my style!" and took a box we were going to use for sawing in half, taking off her clothes behind it and later using that as cover-up.
The others got distracted by her words and cries of agony. Kevin wiped out on the speed course, badly scrapping his back, and some of the flying paint burnt his cap and scalp too. Rolf and Jonny didn't notice in time how they were about to fall into traps when not looking ahead at what the obstacle course featured. This cost them dearly, and I had never seen them get hurt as much in my life except for maybe when I challenged the shepherd's son to the "Hairy Chest of Resilience" badge. Anyway, lots of traps were set off, and both looked like they wanted to kill us afterwards.
With fear running through our minds, we knew this was crossing lines like never before. Only one idea came up: run to avoid death! Ed went home to pack his belongings and flee Peach Creek, Double D did the same, and I saw no good reason not to join them. That's when we knew things would never be the same no matter what followed. I immediately regretted how I set things off but was too scared for my life to say that aloud at the time, believing it would fall on deaf ears.
There you go, that's the first chapter! It might not be very long but I plan on making others bigger. This will focus primarily on the Eds and at times will explore moments not shown on camera. How does my guess for the botched scheme sound? It combines some elements of fan theories I saw posted on Reddit with other things I came up with myself. This fic could be wrong on what happened, but Danny Antonucci and the other writers left it up to viewers' imaginations.
Chapter posted: November 8, 2023.