Sorry, I know I'm late again, but I've been really busy lately. I promise that I won't leave this story unfinished. I'm about 6-7 chapters ahead of what I'm posting so I should hopefully get the story finished before I catch up with myself. Well, that's the plan at least, but I will finish the story no matter what. I know where I'm going with the story, I just need to fins the time to write it lol
The next morning, I awoke wrapped in Edward's arms, my stomach already full of butterflies as I thought of the day ahead. Whilst I was looking forward to my life with Edward, I was dreading the pain I knew I would be in for the three days of the change. I had tried not to let Edward know just how much I was worried about it. I wasn't worried about him changing his mind, not any more. The only thing that would stop me from becoming a vampire was if I changed my mind, something that definitely wasn't going to happen. However, I didn't want Edward worrying about me any more than I knew he would be already. Even now, I could feel the tension in how he held me. I turned around to look at him, seeing the worry in his eyes.
"Hey, none of that, remember," I said softly, "No brooding. Everything will be fine. I promise."
"I know that when it's all over, everything will be fine," he said, "But before that, I have to inflict immense amounts of pain on you, pain that will last days, pain that will likely cause you to beg for death. It's hard to think past that."
I pulled him to me, resting his head on my chest, "I know, but you have to think past it. Think of having me forever. It's the only way through it."
"I'll try," he whispered, "It really should be me comforting you, not the other way around."
"Well, when were we ever traditional," I quipped, eliciting a small chuckle from him, "Now, let's get ready and head up to the main house. I'm sure Esme has whipped up one hell of a last supper." He smiled at me, it only just reaching his eyes, but I could tell that he was trying hard for my sake.
We quickly showered and dressed before leisurely walking up to the main house. As predicted, Esme had clearly been cooking up a storm overnight. All of my favourite foods were spread out over the counters, most not even breakfast foods, but it didn't matter. I piled my plate high with a little bit of everything, savouring my last meal as a human.
"Are you ready?" Carlisle asked as I finished my meal, "We can wait until later if you'd prefer."
"No," I said, standing up and taking Edward's hand, "I'm ready now."
"Wait!" I heard from behind me, turning around to see Rosalie coming into the room, "Can we talk? In private?"
"Umm, yeah," I said, looking up to Edward who nodded, letting me know that her thoughts showed she didn't mean any harm.
We walked out into the garden and through the trees into the forest in silence. I assumed that she really did want privacy for whatever she wanted to say and was waiting until we were far enough from the house before talking. When we reached a safe distance from the house, she stopped and turned to face me.
"Look, I know I haven't always been the most welcoming," Rosalie began, "I just wanted to make sure you know that it was never about you. I have always struggled with what I am, more so than anyone else in the family. In the beginning, having you around just reminded me of what I had lost."
"But, that's no excuse for how I treated you back in Forks," she continued, "Even when I posted those letters, I knew that I could have helped you out more. Given you an address or at least something more to go on, but I didn't because as much as I hated what Edward's misery was doing to us all, I was still jealous of you, of your humanity, so I just left it up to you to do the hard work to help fix my family. Since you came back into our lives, I really have tried to get over all of that, but your decision to become a vampire made it hard for me to get over it fully."
"I get it..." I began, but she cut me off, holding her hand up.
"Let me finish," she said softly, "It has taken me a long time, too long really, to realise that this is your decision and yours alone. It's not the decision that I would make, but that doesn't mean it's the wrong decision for you. I am truly sorry for how I have treated you in the past. I wanted you to know, before you become a vampire, that I am fully on board with your decision and I can't wait to welcome you fully, and eternally, into my family as my sister."
She looked down at her feet, clearly feeling vulnerable after putting herself out there like that.
"Thank you, Rose," I said, tears filling my eyes as I took a step towards her, "That really means a lot to me." I pulled her into a hug. She was hesitant at first, holding herself back from me a little, but she quickly wrapped her arms around me and hugged me back.
~~~PS ILYF~~~
A little while later, I was lying in a bed in one of the guest rooms in the main house, my stomach churning with nerves. We had decided that the best place for my transformation was in the main house as our little cottage was too small. Edward was going to need his family around him if he was going to get through the next few days.
It was just Edward and I in the room, though Carlisle was on standby just outside the door in case there were any issues. Edward was worried that he wouldn't be able to stop once he tasted my potent blood, but I was sure that wouldn't be the case. Carlisle also had complete faith in him, but had agreed to be close by to pull Edward away if needed, though it was more for Edward's peace of mind than anything else.
The rest of the family were in the woods, just far enough away so that they wouldn't be tempted by the blood, but close enough that they could be back in seconds if there were any problems.
"Are you sure?" Edward asked for about the millionth time today, staring into my eyes as though he might see a sliver of doubt.
"I am. I promise," I said, my eyes never leaving his, "I'm ready. I love you."
"As I love you," he whispered as he leant down and captured my lips with his. He poured all his love for me into that one kiss, his tongue gliding smoothly over mine. If the butterflies in my stomach hadn't been doing somersaults, I might have tried to deepen the kiss, but I didn't and he soon pulled back. His golden eyes met my brown ones one final time before he leant down towards my neck.
I felt his lips gently caress my neck sending tingles throughout my body, but almost instantly they disappeared as I felt and heard his teeth slicing through my skin. At first, I didn't feel any pain, just the pressure of his teeth sinking through my flesh, but after a few seconds, the burning pain began, seeping through the wound and into my veins. I felt him lightly sweep his tongue over the wound, sealing his venom into my veins, before moving his teeth to various other parts of my body and repeating his actions. Carlisle had said that the more entry points for the venom, the quicker the change would be.
He was quick, slicing precisely through my flesh, sealing the wound before moving on to the next point. Within seconds, he had finished, all his worries about not being able to stop had been unfounded, as I had always known.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," he murmured over and over again, as he took my hand in his and settled into a chair by the bed.
I could feel the hot, burning pain at each of those points on my body. It felt like someone had lit a fire at various parts of my body and I tried with all my might not to call out or scream. I was holding it together so far, but it had only been a few minutes and I knew that I wasn't going to be able to hold off much longer. I hated to hurt Edward. I knew that every shout, every scream, every yell would sear right through his heart and I had hoped that I would be able to spare him that.
It soon got to the point that I just couldn't hold it in any longer and, almost without conscious thought, I screamed. It made no difference to the pain. The pain just kept getting worse. The fire seemed to burn even hotter as it spread through my veins. For the moment, the pain and fire seemed to be localised to the points where he had bitten me; my neck, both wrists, behind each knee, and directly over my heart. However, each of those points already felt like they should be charred black, burnt beyond recognition.
As time continued, if it did indeed continue as I burned, the fire slowly seeped to the other parts of my body. The areas of fire grew larger, spreading over my chest, up my arms, down my legs, and slowly out from my heart, until there wasn't a single speck of my body that wasn't in complete agony.
I continued to scream, to yell, to beg for death as anything had to be better than the utter hell I was in now. My body writhed on the bed, my arms and legs thrashing wildly, my mind having no control whatsoever over my own body.
This continued for some indeterminate amount of time, until finally, something changed. Not the pain. That was just as bad as ever, but somehow I was able to think through the pain, to take in my surroundings, and listen to sounds around me. I was not alone in this circle of hell. I could feel a cold hand in mine and I could hear the slow breathing of someone sitting beside me. Taking a deep breath in between the screams, I was able to detect the soft sunshine and honey scent that was all Edward. That helped to calm my mind, if not my body, just knowing that Edward was by my side.
That was all I could concentrate on; Edward. I focused on his scent, his breathing, anything to take my mind off the burning pain. I counted the passage of time by the number of breaths he took. I lost count many times when the pain gave way to screams, but it helped give me something else to think about.
I heard footsteps thumping upstairs and along wooden floors, getting closer and closer. Someone else had joined us in the room. I took a deep breath. The scent of incense and old books wafted around me and I don't know how, but I knew that it was Carlisle's scent I could smell. The footsteps stopped and I could sense that he was standing by the bed.
"How are you doing, son?" he asked, his voice laced with concern.
"I don't know," Edward whispered, but I heard it so clearly. His voice was rough with emotion, the pain clear as he continued, "I just hate that she's in so much pain because of me. I caused it."
"This was her choice. It's what she wanted," Carlisle told him, "And remember, no brooding. Talk to her. At this point in the transformation, she should be starting to think around the pain. Hearing your voice will only help." The footsteps retreated, back out of the room and down the stairs.
"Bella, love? Can you hear me?" he asked.
I wanted more than anything to answer him, to do anything to acknowledge that I could hear him so he would continue speaking, but I couldn't. I couldn't speak or even get my body to respond to what my mind wanted it to do. My body still writhed in pain, my limbs thrashing, but the screams and yelling seemed to ease ever so slightly. Maybe he also noticed and that's why he continued talking. Whatever the reason, I was so pleased. Hearing his voice was like a balm for my soul.
"I hope you can," he continued, "Carlisle said you should be able to. I'm so sorry. I hate that you are in such pain because of me." I heard a muffled shout from downstairs, though I couldn't make out what was said.
"Sorry," Edward shouted back, "Alice told me to stop brooding. I told you she would keep me in line." He chuckled lightly and it was the most amazing sound. It didn't last long, only a split second, but it calmed me to know that something was getting through his brooding.
He talked and talked, ignoring the screams as best he could. He began by telling me what all of the family were up to, before transitioning into stories from all of their years at high school. I listened, not always taking in the information, the pain making it hard to concentrate. He could have been reading me the dictionary and I wouldn't have cared. I was just happy to hear his soothing voice.
After another chunk of indeterminate time, I began to notice that I was actually able to focus on everything he was saying. The pain was still as bad as ever, but my brain was expanding and I was able to compartmentalise the fire and concentrate on the content of his stories, rather than just the sound of his voice.
I also realised that I was able to hear so much more. I could hear the rest of the family in every corner of the house. I could hear the clinking of Rose's tools as she worked on the cars. I could hear the rustling of pages turning in Carlisle's study. I could hear the tinny sounds of the video game Jasper and Emmett were playing.
Then I could hear light, cat-like footsteps heading towards the room. They were so quiet I'm sure I would never have been able to hear them as a human. I took a deep breath as they reached the room, smelling a burst of citrus, lemon and orange, mixed with a hint of floral fragrances. With the way the footsteps had danced into the room and the vibrant scent that accompanied them, I knew that it had to be Alice.
"Only another few hours," she said, "Look."
There was silence between her and Edward and I assumed he was watching a vision in her head. A vision of me awakening from my transformation. I wondered how long it had actually been. I couldn't have said if it was minutes, hours, or days, but if there were only a few hours left, as Alice said, then I must have been burning for a few days at least.
"Thank you," Edward said, "It helps to see that she will be fine soon."
"She'll be more than 'fine'," Alice retorted and I could almost hear her rolling her eyes, "She'll be spectacular."
"She always has been," he replied, in typical Edward fashion.
They sat in silence, probably communicating silently as they usually did. Sure enough, after a few moments, Edward growled at Alice.
"I can't leave her!" he exclaimed out of nowhere. I panicked at the thought of him leaving. Hearing his voice and feeling his hand in mine was the only thing that was keeping me sane. I screamed louder and gripped his hand tighter, hoping he would understand.
"See," he said, "She doesn't want me to leave either."
"We need to clean her up, get her dressed, and change the sheets before she wakes up," Alice said.
"Fine, do it," Edward sighed, "But I'm not leaving her side, not even for a second."
"Ugh, stubborn vampire," Alice muttered under her breath, "It would be a lot quicker if you'd just give us a few minutes, but I can see I'm not going to change your mind."
"Oh, leave him be, Alice," a soft voice said from across the room. Taking in a deep breath, my nose was filled with the warming scent of ginger and cinnamon that could only be Esme.
I was lifted, manoeuvred this way and that, before being set into a bath full of water. I had no idea if the water was hot or cold, as it made absolutely no difference to my burning skin. Someone washed my body, getting rid of any signs of my blood I assumed, shampooed and conditioned my hair, before lifting me out and drying me. I was dressed in something soft, which felt much better against my burning skin that my jeans had and placed back on to clean smelling sheets on the bed.
All the while, Edward was true to his word and his hand never left mine, despite the many protests from the pixie, who insisted he was just making things much harder. She was wrong though. He was definitely making things much easier for me.
By the time I was placed back on the bed, I noticed that something had changed. There was a tiny area of skin at the tips of my fingers and toes that was no longer burning. Whilst the rest of me was still burning just as bad as before, this tiny change gave me hope. It must be nearing the end. As time continued to pass, the pain slowly continued to recede, inching its way down my fingers and toes, along my wrists and ankles. However, as more and more of my body became pain-free, the parts that were still burning seemed to get impossibly hotter. It was as though the fire was not dying out, but just condensing down to a smaller area. The smaller the area that it filled, the hotter it burned and the louder I screamed.
All hope I'd had when the fire had begun to recede was lost. There was no way that my body would be able to withstand this heat. I was sure that something must be wrong. The fire was surely going to char my body beyond recognition.
It continued like that, until once again, despite my expanded brain, I couldn't focus on anything except the white hot burning sensation that was now solely focused on my chest. My heart was beating frantically as it tried to fight off the fire that threatened to consume me. I screamed, I yelled, I thrashed and I lost sense of everything and everyone around me. I was alone. Burning in hell. Nothing mattered, except the pain.
And then, it stopped. Everything stopped. The pain, my heartbeat, every single sound in the house. I lay completely still, unable to comprehend how I had gone from excruciating pain to nothing in a split second. I took a deep breath and before I knew it, my instincts kicked in, and I flipped off the bed, a movement so fast, that everything should have been a blur, but I saw every single detail.
I hit a wall, plaster crumbling around me as I landed in an aggressive crouch, a growl erupting from my mouth without my permission, staring into the wide eyes of seven vampires.